A Romeo and Juliet Story

Chapter Five

Akira arrived at Hato Street the following weekend at 9:30am, half an hour before his scheduled meeting time with Kaede. He'd taken two buses and the subway to get there. He had his own car of course, but since it was particularly distinctive and particularly valuable, it was far too noticeable to bring on a day of secrecy.

He'd spent the whole journey contemplating his new favourite daydream: Kaede Rukawa. What would he say? How would he act? Would he even come at all?

The day was shaping up to be hot, with the sun already bright in a cloudless morning sky. Even in his breezey basketball clothes; a Nike t-shirt and baggy black shorts which reached his knees, he could feel the heat rising, and a fine sheen of sweat was already brushed over his brow.

He didn't have to wait long for the sound of Kaede's bike approaching. The engine gave a distinctive low, powerful rumble which rose above the noise of the other traffic before the bike even came into view. Kaede was also early.

Akira hoped that it was a good sign that they were both so keen, perhaps a promise for a good day ahead.

He watched as the uniquely painted bike swerved into view, rounding the corner of the road sharply, and he suddenly felt the unfamiliar bite of nervousness in the pit of his stomach. The object of his curiosity and his recent daydreams was approaching. He wasn't usually the type to feel self-conscious, but something about Kaede gave him a feeling of a gentle but insistent pressure. As if he wanted, needed, to appear significant; as if it was important for him to somehow win Kaede's respect.

Passion lends them power, time, and means to meet.

Hato Road was on the south side of the city of Yokohama in the Totsuka district. It was Sendoh territory but at such a distance from the main hubs that the area was little frequented by anyone from the families. Still, it was not safe, even here, for the two of them to risk being seen together. Akira had a longer trip planned, to take them out of the city completely.

Kaede drew up to the kerb where Akira stood and dropped a foot to the pavement but did not cut the engine. He flipped open the visor of his helmet to reveal his blue eyes which fixed cooly on Akira's welcoming smile.

It seemed that Kaede had also realised that the day would be a hot one because he had abandoned his riding leathers and simply wore loose sports clothing like Akira.

Kaede considered Akira silently. He felt a reluctant recognition that Akira was somehow different. Beyond his experience. A realisation that this odd Sendoh boy was probably worthy of his time. However, these were things that stirred only very dully the dark depths of Kaede's consciousness. Unlike Akira he found that he could dismiss such fleeting thoughts and observations easily, refusing to allow them to affect him.

His soul had been barricaded in so securely for so long - necessary for the preservation of his very sanity - that he was distanced from his own thoughts and feelings as though he was looking at them through fogged glass.

Akira raised a hand in greeting to the boy perched on the bike. He moved closer in order to be heard, oddly conscious of every movement he was making and the nearing proximity of their two bodies: "We're going to Odawara, okay?"

Odawara was a city in Kanagawa further south along the coastline, approximately an hour's journey from Yokohama City. It was a small place known mostly for its beautiful feudal castle and was a popular spot for tourists. It was small enough and far away enough to be of little interest to the drug barons of Yokohama, so the area ought to be safe enough for them.

Kaede considered this for a moment before he nodded shortly, flipped his visor shut again and turned back to the road.

Aware that his companion hadn't yet said a word, Akira pulled his own helmet down over his head and climbed onto the bike behind the boy. Perhaps he should have felt disheartened by Kaede's short and unwelcoming manner but somehow he didn't. It only served to make Kaede all the more interesting to him. He wondered what it was like to be able to go about life in such a simple, straightforward way. To so confidently dismiss those you deem unworthy of your time, and to interact so directly and plainly with those who were.

He gripped the seat with his knees, feeling the warmth and vibrations of the engine between his thighs. His legs pressed against Kaede's legs. His chest close to his back. He placed his hands on Kaede's waist and swallowed. Luckily his face was hidden by his helmet.

He didn't have time to adjust his position because Kaede had already opened the throttle and the bike was surging forward eagerly. Akira's gentle touch tightened into a firm grip as their rapid acceleration suddenly jolted him.

They would be following the road west until they could join the main highway which would take them all the way down the coast to Odawara.

Kaede, Akira came to realise very quickly, was a skilled but very fast driver. Several times his heart leapt into his throat as the bike wove quickly through traffic and round corners, coming so close to contact with other vehicles or obstacles that Akira would wince involuntarily and close his eyes in nervousness. Cars would come at them from all directions but Kaede would handle the bike easily, reacting quickly, winding it from one side of the road to the other and back again without slowing; continually avoiding collisions by an ominously narrow margin.

It took very little time for them to get away from the residential streets and out onto the highway. They were already traveling at speed when they joined it, but once they had lined up straight Kaede could really let the bike go.

The machine howled in eagerness and leapt forward, covering the ground greedily as though it were a starving beast seeking to devour the road. Akira felt as if his organs were being pushed back into his spine, and he clung to Kaede fiercely. For the time they were accelerating rapidly his whole world was reduced to nothing but noise, power and speed; a whirlwind of insanity. The bellowing of the wind and the engine was deafening. He could barely think above it all.

Eventually their speed levelled out and Akira could finally relax and enjoy the sensation of their wild abandon. Green fields and farms passed intermittently on the right while on the left he could catch short glimpses of the blue of the sea beyond the trees. The wind's resistance on his body was exhilarating, even though Kaede was sheltering him from the majority of the blast. And all the while he was conscious of Kaede's warmth, his body, his presence. It was a sweet madness. To Akira it felt as though they were running away, escaping. The speed had a sense of urgency, of desperation. What they were doing was sheer madness. Whether or not Kaede felt the same way was impossible to tell. He did not turn or make any kind of indication, keeping his face forwards towards the road in concentration. Akira genuinely hoped that Kaede was enjoying the ride and the sense of freedom just as much as he was.

Finally he became aware of their deceleration. He saw the city of Odawara looming over to their left. They took the ramp off the main highway and joined a more minor road that skirted the eastern side of the city. Kaede then took them down a residential street, seeming to know where he was going. Akira allowed him to navigate.

After a few more twists and turns they arrived at a park situated next to the Sagami River. It was a grassy area that covered the river's immediate flood plain. There was a tow path stretching in either direction along the river bank with only a couple of dog-walkers to be seen in the distance. Parallel to the river, the residential estates were set well back from the river's edge for fear of high waters. It was in this park that an empty and inviting basketball court awaited them, peppered around its edge with a few young trees.

As before Kaede rode the bike straight across the grass, not bothering to dismount and walk, not in the least concerned about the damage he was doing to the turf, and pulled up at the very edge of the concrete. They had arrived.

Akira climbed excitedly off the back and yanked off his helmet, still feeling the last of the adrenaline from the ride in his veins. Kaede also removed his helmet, still in his seat on the bike. His curious eyes met Akira's bright ones. The older boy couldn't help it when laughter bubbled up inside him and he had to let it out in a great peal of unabashed joy. They were miles away from their families, their enemies, their responsibilities. They were just two boys with an entire lazy day ahead of them. There was no Hisashi, no Hanamichi, no Tetsuo to disturb them. They could play as long as they liked, and perhaps afterwards they might… talk. Such a feeling of joyous lightness was the cause of Akira's open laughter. Feeling much the same sensations, and watching Akira's happiness, Kaede could even feel a twitch in his own lips – the beginnings of a smile. He hid it by turning away in order to dismount from the bike.

Still chuckling to himself, Akira unzipped his sports bag and pulled out the bright orange ball. Leaving their helmets hooked on the bike's handlebars the two boy set out to make use of the empty court, commencing their own particular war. Their attitudes were very different from the last time they had played.

What Akira had instinctively known before was true: Kaede was a proud individual. What he hadn't taken into account was his own streak of pride. The last time they had played together they had been anonymous. This time they were real rivals. They were the two great houses: Sendoh and Rukawa. Neither boy underestimated the other but both were unshakeably determined to triumph. Every point was so vehemently won or lost that the stakes couldn't have seemed higher had they been playing with guns and bullets instead. It was as if they both came alive in the manifestation of their shared rivalry.

Akira gasped air into his lungs as Kaede jostled him, pushing him backwards, attempting to get closer to the basket. The younger boy quickly feinted to the left but Akira didn't follow him, instead throwing his hand to the right which gave him a lucky strike at the ball as Kaede turned that way. The younger boy hissed in annoyance and quickly chased to recover his lost possession, losing himself precious ground. Akira didn't give him space to move, immediately appearing at his side again, pressuring him. Kaede made as if to dash around Akira to the left and Akira took a step in that direction before realising that he'd been taken in. Kaede rose up and took a shot, well outside the key, close to the three-point line. Akira watched the ball swish cleanly through the net. Two points. He raised an eyebrow at Kaede, who wiped the sweat off his forehead with his wristband tiredly.

"That was risky," he commented.

Kaede only shrugged.

It was a gamble. Taking a shot from such an unfavourable position for only two points. The reward was nominal and the difficulty increased due to the distance. Most players would consider, in such a situation, that a drive towards the basket, or even a step backwards to make three points would give them a better situation.

Akira grinned and went to recover the ball since it was now his turn to attack. He, too, had some tricks to show. Quickly collecting himself in order to begin his assault he put his back to the defending Kaede and raised his right arm high to protect the ball. He concentrated on the net which was a good distance away. He had to hit it just right…

He baited Kaede into taking a lunge for the ball before spinning away and throwing it towards the basket in a quick over arm loop. It clanged loudly against the nearside of the rim and bounced out. Kaede didn't react, surprised by the strange move, and could only stare as Akira ran and jumped high to meet it in mid-air, slamming it forcefully into the basket.

Akira dropped heavily to the floor and doubled up, trying to catch his breath. Beads of sweat dripped sparkling to the floor.

"Self-alley-oop tensai-style" he named it, still gasping in exhaustion but grinning up at Kaede who hadn't moved. He picked up the ball again and stared blankly at it, his tiredness washing over him like waves. "Something my brother likes to do. Let's stop for a break."

Kaede nodded and without a word headed towards an elm tree at the edge of the court under which they had left their bags. Akira quickly joined him. Looking at his watch he realised that they had been playing at full tilt for close to two hours. It was definitely time to eat something.

They took shelter from the blazing sun under the tree and Akira pulled some wrapped sandwiches, a bag of fruit and some cans of juice from his bag and passed some to Kaede. The younger boy looked doubtful as he took them. Akira gave him a reassuring smile.

"I didn't tell you where we were going, so it's only fair that I provide lunch, right?"

Kaede hesitated for a moment more before starting to unwrap the sandwiches. With another smile Akira turned his attention to his own neatly wrapped lunch. He picked up a green apple from the collection of fruit, preferring the sourness of them over the sweet reds, and tucked it into his pocket for later.

"This is nice, right?" he asked, bringing his first sandwich up to his mouth. He took a bite.

Kaede gave a soft "hmm" as he took a bite of his own.

Akira chewed contentedly for a while. He felt inexplicably happy. It was gathering up inside him, in his head and in his chest, insistent that he acknowledge it somehow. He felt almost dizzy with the weightlessness he felt. He couldn't help but to speak out to the strange boy who was the cause of it.

"Kaede…?" The younger boy turned his head slightly to look at him. "Let's be friends."

Kaede's eyes flashed with sudden confusion although he disguised it almost immediately.

Akira at once regretted speaking so casually about a topic so potentially serious. He hadn't really thought about it, the question had just jumped out of him. The enjoyment he was feeling, the contentment, had lulled him into a fantasy world. One where the two of them were not enemies. He didn't want this to be the only time that they ever met like this. He wanted it to be the beginning of something bigger, and not just the end of their brief acquaintance.

There was a long silence. Kaede didn't move, just watching Akira's profile blankly. When he finally spoke his voice was very soft, almost just a breath of air;

"I don't know, Akira."

It was laced with uncertainty, and perhaps regret.

Akira turned his head to look at him. The bruise that had covered Kaede's cheek last week was all but gone. Only a faint shadow lingered around his right eye. His eyes were as entrancing as always –dramatic blue, deep and full of secrets. They were alight with that remarkable vividness which gave him his nickname – kitsune. He looked delicate, breakable. Beautiful.

"Neither of us are really our father's sons" Akira said, fully believing his words. The boy before him was different. The fact that they were here together, as impromptu companions, was proof enough of that.

Kaede quickly looked away. "You've misjudged me, Akira Sendoh."

Akira smiled. "I don't think so." He finished off his current sandwich and began on the next one while Kaede slowly sipped his drink.

"Kaede..?" Akira began again. "Why did you help me? I mean, with Tetsuo…?"

The fox-eyed boy paused with the piece of bread halfway to his mouth. After a moment he put it back down, his eyes narrowing slightly. He knew exactly what Akira was attempting to do. He was trying to get Kaede to prove that his last comment – 'not our father's sons' – was justified. To suggest that Kaede's action of letting him go meant that he could at least be partially blamed for initiating this whole… whatever it was.

Friendship.

Acquaintance.

Mess.

But Kaede could not afford to admit to such weaknesses. Not even to himself. His eyebrows creased slightly as he focused on the eyes of his companion for a moment. They were utterly unguarded; so readable, so open, so naive. He found that he had to look away in order to speak, although he didn't understand why.

I care not.

"I just want to know more about you," he said finally. "You are my enemy, after all."

It was calculated self-interest. Selfishness. No one in the world gave a damn about Kaede Rukawa, he reminded himself. Of course the same was true of this Sendoh boy, whether or not he realised it. They were alive only because it was more convenient that way. Both of them. Just chess pieces for their families to use and discard at will. If Akira was foolish enough to believe that Kaede thought of him as anything more than a commodity then – well – he was too naive.

There was silence.

Kaede imagined the disappointment on Akira's face. It was like bullying a child; the ridiculous optimism Akira had, his lack of barriers, the way he opened himself up so readily to hurt and rejection. The real world was cold and cruel, it had no place for children - Kaede had learnt that long ago. Finally he turned to look over at him.

Akira was… smiling. His eyes were cheerful. Kaede stared at that anomaly in surprise.

"Kaede," he said simply, "I don't believe you."

The young Rukawa blinked and then frowned. Did this boy's optimism know no limits? He could have sighed in frustration.

And yet.

Meeting his eyes reminded Kaede of another time. Another moment. Years ago. It came upon him suddenly, the recollection of that day, unwelcome and unbidden.

Just once. Just once in his memory he could recall acting out of kindness. Could he have unwittingly done it again for Akira even while convincing himself otherwise?

The memory was of a moment when his world had been changed irrevocably. The point when he'd become aware of the difference between right and wrong. A crack across the glass of his sanity that had tormented him ever since.

The man lay dead on the bed, blood seeping from the hole in the back of his head, marking the path of the bullet. The blood trickled down his naked back, onto the sheets. Under the corpse, a child near Kaede's age was whining in quiet distress. Struggling to push the weight of the dead man away. He was naked and crying. For a moment, Kaede could do little but stare, Hisashi just behind him, the gun still clenched in his hand. His world suddenly awash with a strange new understanding. He had done this. Evil. Monstrous thing. And yet, for the first time he knew that even his cursed existence could be justified.

Echoes of this memory ran through him now as he faced Akira's smile and was forced to question himself. Akira had planted doubt in him with one simple phrase. He'd forced him with brutal gentleness to acknowledge the falseness of his self-inflicted illusion.

And worse: he knew his sudden confusion was visible on his face, and he couldn't recover his composure. His frown, his mistake, his uncertainty, everything was revealed to Akira. He felt exposed, naked, in a way he hadn't felt for years. He didn't like the sensation one bit.

It was the first time Akira had seen such a clear expression on the usually cool and unreadable features. Akira felt his heart speed up knowing that for the first time he'd caused Kaede's faultless mask to truly slip.

Unfortunately it was a negative emotion rather than a positive one. Akira would have been thrilled to see perhaps a smile, laughter even, but despite that small mishap he knew what he was seeing. A glimpse of Kaede - the real Kaede – the emotions that were hiding under his façade, proof that there were emotions hiding there, just out of reach: even if it was a frowning Kaede it was still incomparably precious.

Kaede leaned back against the tree trunk and closed his eyes, his face quickly settling back into its usual blank expression. The emotion Akira had seen there vanished, as though it had been nothing more than a mirage. What strength of will allowed the boy to erase the expression on his face like that? What self-control was involved in keeping his emotions concealed so infallibly? It was extraordinary.

Kaede silently reprimanded himself. He had assumed he'd had the upper hand, thinking of Akira as an innocent child, dismissing him as foolish and simple, but in the end the tables had been turned on him so easily. Effortlessly.

Now it was he, and not Akira, who was the child. He mentally rebuked himself, unable to believe that he had lost control of his foolish pride. He'd underestimated Akira, not for the first time, and he needed to recover his composure. He kept his eyes shut tight to the world, blocking that open and smiling face out. And yet for some reason it kept appearing unwelcome behind his closed eyelids. Akira's smile: irritating, mocking.

He seemed to find it all so simple. The ease about him, the straightforward way he conversed. It was all so natural. Almost perfectly Kaede's opposite. Just his presence was disarming. He didn't need to lay traps or trick others; they revealed themselves of their own accord just as Kaede had accidentally done a moment ago.

It seemed that Akira would turn out to be dangerous, truly dangerous, just as he had suspected. Kaede shivered despite the heat of the day.

They sat in silence for a long while, Akira finishing the last of his lunch, apparently oblivious to the internal conflict he'd caused, and Kaede seeming to doze against the tree. A passer-by would have just seen two teenaged boys simply enjoying each others company. Friendship. Or something like it.

Akira looked up at the sunny sky contentedly, following a cloud with his eyes as it floated gently through the blue. Kaede's eyes cracked open to consider him silently. He was close enough to reach out and touch, and yet he was completely unguarded. He paid no attention to the enemy who sat only a hand's reach away. He was completely unconscious of any danger; confident and relaxed.

"Kitsune..." Akira muttered thoughtfully to himself.

Kaede stiffened. "What?"

Akira looked towards him. "You're said to be quite a gunman."

Kaede gave a small shrug.

"Isn't that what they call you? Kitsune?"

Kaede couldn't help giving a shudder at the sound of his alias, as he did almost every time he heard it. He'd traded under that pseudonym for over eight years now, but it still brought about that inconvenient unconscious reaction in him.

"Uh, yeah…" Kaede didn't meet his eyes. "I don't know who came up with that."

"You like it though." Akira grinned.

Kaede stared at him for a moment, trying to imagine what distorted world Akira must be living in to believe in something so shockingly incorrect as that statement.

"Why do you say that?" he managed to ask.

"Your gun. It's engraved with them, right?"

Kaede frowned, realising that Akira's mistaken assumption may have been semi-reasonable after all.

"It was a gift; I didn't choose it," he said defensively. A little too defensively for his own sanction. He mentally shook himself again, remembering that he needed to be more careful around Akira lest he trip up again.

"May I see?"

Kaede looked suspiciously at him through his fringe. Akira's face was still marred with that irritating smile of reassurance. Kaede felt like he was being pitied and patronised by that incessant expression. It annoyed him.

But Akira's eyes held nothing but open curiosity, not a single glimmer of malicious intent. So Kaede slipped his hand under his shirt and felt the familiar metal there. It was warm to touch after being kept pressed so close against his body. He slipped it out and brought it into the sunshine. The foxes engraved down the barrel of the gun winked in the light as though laughing at them both.

The gun was one of an identical pair, although he usually only bothered to carry one with him. They had been gifted to him by the Mitsui family, the family of Hisashi's mother, once the reputation of kitsune had become established.

"Ah," Akira picked it up with curiosity from Kaede's open and unresisting palm. It was heavy and unfamiliar to grip. "It's a Wesson. 9mm right? Standard?"

"Modified bull barrel and chamber." Kaede corrected him softly.

Akira turned it to examine the engravings. There were six foxes on each side, all unique. They were pictured in various attitudes of running, jumping and turning. The detail was minute, right down to their whiskers. Yet there was something a little disturbing about seeing them pictured there. They looked like drawings for children and yet they ornamented such a lethal weapon.

"So…" he said finally, passing the gun back to its owner "…just how good are you?"

Kaede looked up at him and hesitated over the answer, not too sure how to reply. How did one measure a talent that brought nothing but nightmares?

He'd been happy at first that finally there was something he could do; something that he excelled at over Hisashi. His father had been pleased. The young Kaede had thought that perhaps he might finally know his father's favour and that was why, when the reality of it became apparent, he hadn't shrunk back from it. It was his talent, and he clung to it even as it bucked and threatened to shake him off. Even as it rolled and crushed him. Because guns were made for killing. Because being able to hit a target in a competition and win a trophy was just a child's game and Kaede didn't live in a child's world. His reality was destined to be much more brutal despite his young years. He was, after all, just a useful tool and his talent, his curse, would not be overlooked.

"Not... bad," Kaede muttered, his mind suddenly flooded by the memory of all the blood that his little skill had shed.

Detecting the high level of modesty Akira laughed, causing Kaede to look at him in curious bewilderment. His face was light-hearted, the sight of which gave Kaede a stab of pain to know that it was impossible for Akira to see the misery that that gun had caused. He wondered, for a moment, what it would be like for Akira to see through his eyes. To know what he had done. To see what he had seen.

Would he be able to laugh so easily then?

"Let's have a test!" Akira suddenly climbed to his feet and snatched up one of the uneaten sandwiches from the floor. He grinned mischievously. Kaede watched as he jogged away across the basketball court to the far side where a young tree stood apart from the others, creating a small isolated patch of shade.

Akira reached up and set the sandwich on one of the lower branches of the tree, then turned and waved back to Kaede across the court, calling out;

"Okay! Shoot this!"

Kaede raised an eyebrow. It was difficult to dwell on morbid thoughts in the company of someone so cheerful. It seemed even something as deadly as a gun could be turned into an innocent game by the smiling eyes of Sendoh Akira.

A part of Kaede told him that he should refuse. It was silly, pointless, and he didn't have anything to prove. Why should he show his skill to this man? The whole idea of shooting was weighed to such heavy milestones in his heart that he hadn't thought it would ever be possible for him to treat it lightly. And yet Akira made him feel like it was almost… innocent. That it was a simple game, a little like those quaint competitions he had entered and the little trophies he had won which still sat in his room.

He'd not felt innocent in many, many years.

Without really knowing why he stood up slowly, the gun grasped in his right hand. He tossed his head in a gesture of arrogance and raised the gun to eye level, his right arm fully extended straight before him with his left dropped casually at his side.

"Whoa!" Akira threw up his hands as the gun pointed in his direction "hold on!" He moved sideways out of danger.

Kaede couldn't help the amused snort of air that escaped his nostrils. "I thought you were giving me a challenge Sendoh Akira?" he said, and fired.

The sandwich exploded. Blobs of tuna splattered down the tree trunk. Akira threw a hand over his mouth, and then doubled over with laughter.

Kaede gave a flicker of an uncertain smile. He couldn't tell whether Akira was mocking him or not, but his laughter was so real and so infectious he couldn't help but feel its influence. Perhaps it had been okay for him to play around a little bit.

"Hey…" Akira straightened and wiped away a tear, still chuckling, "…that was great. Let me find something else…"

He thrust his hands deep into his pockets and pulled out the shiny green apple that he had placed there earlier. "What about this?" He began to laugh again, already imagining the pulverised fruit.

Kaede felt his uncertainty return. He'd already played along once; it wasn't necessary for him to do it again. After all, he wasn't there just to entertain Akira by shooting at things… it was childish. He was about to put his gun away when Akira appeared to think of something and gave him a knowing smile.

"I know…" he called, approaching the tree again, apple in hand "…what about that William Tell shot?"

Kaede paused with the gun halfway to its holster, casting his mind about, trying to remember where he'd heard that name before.

Instantly he remembered the classical music piece which had taken the name, but then he recalled that that musical piece had been inspired by a folk legend. A folk-hero named William Tell who had been a great crossbow marksman. Kaede could recall the story now, one of his tutors had told him a little about it. The man had been arrested for defying the mayor and as punishment he had been made to…

Even as he thought about the story his eyes followed Akira's actions simultaneously, suddenly aware of what he was going to do, his eyes widening in surprise and disbelief. The Sendoh boy leaned back against the tree, standing upright. He couldn't mean that, surely? He couldn't intend to try… that…?

But trust me and I'll prove more true

Than those that have more cunning to the strange.

Akira reached up and placed the apple carefully on the top of his head, balancing it against the tree.

"Here…" he called, his voice a little less brazen than before. His smile was still wide but his tone and his eyes revealed an unprecedented seriousness, "…shoot it now."

Of course, in the story of William Tell the arrested man had been made to risk shooting an apple off the head of his son as punishment.

Kaede stared at him with wide eyes.

Are you mad?

It was one thing to converse with your enemy. To meet him, to call a temporary truce, even to enjoy your time together as these two boys had been doing this day. It was quite another thing to put your life into his hands unnecessarily.

It could only be some kind of craziness.

As for the shot, it was simple enough for him to do safely, but if he wanted to (and who was to say that he didn't?) he could just blow that naïve boy's brains out like he'd done to the unfortunate sandwich.

Didn't Akira know that? Couldn't he see the complete folly of what he was proposing? Wasn't Akira aware that Kaede was his enemy? This was no longer a child's game, the innocent thing that Akira had first proposed. It had turned into something quite different. Something much more serious. More dangerous.

At the other side of the court Akira closed his eyes and took a long steadying breath. He hadn't planned this; it had just come to him in a flash of inspiration. He had proposed a test and this was it. A test for both of them. It was not, as he had initially intended, a test of Kaede's skill with a gun. It was now a test of trust.

It would be inaccurate to say that Akira was not afraid. His heart was truly jumping in his chest, his palms quickly becoming hot and sweaty. He knew that Kaede would be able to hit the apple, he was sure of it; the boy's skill was well-renowned. The question, of course, was whether he would actually aim for the apple at all or whether he would just try to kill Akira instead. Akira Sendoh. His great enemy.

And yet Akira felt strangely confident. Perhaps it seemed like a big risk but Kaede had had the chance to kill him before and hadn't done so. There was more depth to the frosty boy than he liked to reveal. Much more. The picture of a distant, unfriendly, dangerous young man was not the whole one. Akira was so sure of it.

With these things foremost in his mind Akira spoke clearly, keeping the tremble in his voice entirely under control, the words that, for better or for worse, would stay with the two of them for a long time to come;

"I trust you, Rukawa Kaede."

And that was that. This was the test. Not just for Akira to test his trust in Kaede, but a way for him to prove that trust to Kaede himself. When he opened his eyes they were certain and resolute.

Kaede quickly realised the nature of the game. Their entire involvement from this point onwards must be first founded on this. Until it was done neither of them could be free of suspicion of the other. Perhaps even this would not be enough, but there was no greater gamble they could offer than their own lives. It was a risk that had to be taken. Akira would put his life into Kaede's hands and Kaede could chose to either honour his trust or take that life.

He could see that Akira was deadly serious about the whole thing, and so Kaede didn't intend to drag it out. It would be quick and painless. The younger boy moved swiftly, without ceremony, entirely efficient and direct. The gun was raised in two hands, sighted for the briefest of moments, and then fired before Akira really had a chance to realise what was happening. The bang reached him just before the bullet did. It slammed into the tree trunk, apple pieces flying everywhere.

Akira blinked in surprise, and Kaede had already lowered the gun. It was done. So simple. So efficient. Anti-climactic, one might say.

Realising that it was over, Akira allowed the adrenaline, that primeval fight or flight instinct, to finally wash over him and he sank to the ground suddenly dizzy. The fear he hadn't even allowed himself to acknowledge up until this point was suddenly lifted and he felt unexpectedly light-headed. He looked over and saw Kaede approaching him across the court. He gave a sigh of exhaustion and lent his head back against the hard wood of the tree, closing his eyes against the view of the green leaves and the blue sky above him. He realised that his hands were trembling.

"Akira?" the voice was soft. Akira opened his eyes again and saw the blue eyes of Kaede looking down on him. "Are you... okay?"

Something had changed. And it was no small thing, although it was hard to give a name to. Glad of it, Akira gave a weak smile, different from all the ones he'd given before. Kaede noted it.

"That was very scary" he admitted breathlessly. "Was it scary for you too?"

"No." Kaede offered him a hand and helped him to his feet. "I knew you weren't in danger."

They stood together for a moment, just a breath apart, looking directly into each other's faces, and thinking over what had just occurred. Kaede could feel the change between them. Akira wasn't smiling that ridiculous smile. His lips were still curved upwards but he was serious. He looked more handsome that way the fox-eyed boy caught himself thinking. He wanted to say something more but didn't have any words. It was Akira who began to speak;

"Would you believe me…" the older boy paused mid-sentence as if distracted by something. Then he hesitantly reached out a hand to gently brush a few strands of Kaede's fine fringe away from his eyes in order to see them more clearly. He dropped the hand heavily to his side again, his gaze locked with Kaede's; "Would you believe me if I said I knew that too?"

Kaede did not shy away from the gentle contact. After a moment he nodded silently. Akira trusted him: this he believed. But he knew their strange game was not over yet. The greater challenge was yet to come. Could Kaede trust Akira?

"Now it's your turn, okay?"

If Kaede was entirely honest he'd known it was coming, and he'd also secretly hoped it could be avoided. He creased his eyebrows. It was only fair, but…

"Akira…" he commented "…how? Can you even hit it?"

Akira smiled; he was ready for such a question.

"Don't worry. I won't shoot. I'll just raise the gun, I won't pull the trigger."

Kaede took a few moments to force himself to breathe in and out slowly in measured breaths. He found he had to once again close his eyes to shield himself from Akira's scrutiny. He could feel his heartbeat speeding up and his palms becoming clammy in nervousness. The question, the purpose, seemed to fill him up, transcending words and becoming an emotion, a physical force that filled his chest – could he trust Akira?

It was madness. A desperate game. Russian roulette. He was gambling his life, but gambling his life on what? This… friendship. To what purpose? What did it mean to trust this man? What difference would it make?

Kaede Rukawa didn't trust people. He'd withdrawn from all that. He'd seen and done too many cruel things to have faith in humanity any longer.

And here was his enemy, his enemy, asking him to risk his life. Offering him something… new. Was it just another meaningless escape, or was it really a way to move on – move forwards?

It was Akira who had taken the gamble first. Akira. Akira Sendoh. The name seemed to pulse through Kaede's veins.

He could see the scenario in his mind's eye: himself exposed, trapped with his back against that tree, held there not by ropes or restraints but by his own will, his foolish trust, and Akira's triumphant smile as he pulled the trigger, perhaps even a laugh of victory as he extinguished the life of such a dangerous enemy with such ease.

Fearing such things he looked up into Akira's eyes once again and saw no comfort there. Only a gentle sincerity. The choice was his and his alone; Akira would not attempt to sway him.

He could refuse… but if he did, what would become of him? He would go back to being a Rukawa. Go back to being a worthless son. Go back to his numb existence. Was that really a fate any better than his body destroyed as he stood against that tree?

This was madness to escape from madness. An initiation in blood. His all or nothing. Trust or despair.

His hand was shaking as he pressed the gun into Akira's palm. Realising it Akira's face filled with concern.

"Kaede… you don't…" You don't have to.

"Do it." The younger boy whispered hoarsely. Everything was weighing down on him unbearably. His reason appeared to have cracked. His eyes were so wild that they actually brought about a momentary burst of fear in Akira.

Kaede didn't look at him, but approached the tree with his eyes downcast and leant his back against it where Akira had just stood. It felt rough and uncomfortable but he forced himself to push himself back into it as hard as he could. He focused all his attention on it. All he had to do was stand there. Keep that tree at his back. That was all. Don't move.

Akira went to the far side of the court where Kaede had been, gun in hand swinging gently at his side. Once he reached the place he turned back to face the younger boy across the distance. Kaede finally looked up and met his eyes. What felt like electricity passed between them. Akira was startled by the raw emotions he could see on Kaede's face. He couldn't have imagined it more beautiful than it was at this moment.

Entirely maskless.

Kaede had discarded any attempt to disguise his fear; it was all clear to see. His ragged breathing, his anxious gaze, even the beads of salty terror which were collecting on his lower lashes.

He looked so small, so vulnerable, so exposed and Akira suddenly hated to cause that distress. He was seized with a desire to toss the gun away, just throw it to the side and comfort him. And yet at the same time he knew that to do so would be the greatest insult he could give. He shouldn't underestimate Kaede.

Hating himself for doing it, but unable to stop the game now, he raised the gun in two hands to eye level. Kaede had just fired it so there wasn't any need to cock it again; it was already ready to fire. The only thing that stood between Kaede and death was a single jerk of Akira's index finger.

Kaede's eyes didn't leave his for a single second. Akira remembered the first day they'd met at the Shohoku courts. He could recall the emotions he'd felt while Tetsuo had directed a gun at him. He'd not been able to look at anything but that gun as though his eyes had been drawn to it by magnets. But now Kaede didn't look at the gun for even a moment. He looked only at Akira's eyes, for that was where destiny lay.

With slow strides Akira began to approach, drawing closer, keeping the gun level and steady. With every step he saw Kaede wince as though in pain. With every step he could see Kaede's face more clearly, the emotions raging there: terror and the struggle to master terror. His pale lips parted and panting.

Akira's palms were sweaty to the extent that he feared the gun might slip, and he held it even tighter, the grooves in the metal imprinting onto his palm. His hands were trembling as much as Kaede's were. This reversal of roles was considerably harder for each of them.

He continued to approach one step at a time, drawing slowly closer and closer until he stood directly in front of the boy. With the last step he pressed the gun against Kaede's forehead. Kaede's knees buckled at the contact and he almost slid down the trunk. His eyes finally lost contact with Akira's and rolled upwards under his now closing eyelids as though he was fainting, throwing his fate entirely to the winds. Two tracks of tears finally spilled over and down his cheeks in two silent lines.

Perhaps it wasn't strictly necessary to touch him with the gun but Akira suddenly felt that Kaede should feel his own helplessness. Feel it not only as an emotion, as fear, but feel it as a physical presence, pressed against him. That loss of control. That giving wholly of yourself. That dependence. He wanted Kaede to feel exactly what it was to trust.

Akira waited only a couple of seconds, staring at Kaede's closed eyes and trembling body. Then he gently squeezed his finger. There was a soft mechanical click from the gun. He'd put the manual safely lock back on.

Hearing that comforting sound Kaede gave a final violent shudder and became still. Akira didn't step back but he lowered the gun and tossed it away without regard as he had been longing to do all along. It fell to the ground some way away with a clatter. He found himself reaching out and taking hold of Kaede's upper arms supportingly. The boy slowly opened his eyes. They were wet with tears, his beautiful lashes clumping together and becoming even more defined as a result. Those pale petal lips were parted and panting, his face gently flushed with emotion and his fringe clinging to the damp sweat on his forehead. His face was open and innocent, gazing at Akira's gentle smile in a daze. Akira's eyes drunk in the beautiful sight like a parched man drinking water. Rukawa Kaede. Rukawa Kaede. The name ran through him like a mantra.

Without thinking about it, without question and without hesitation Akira leaned forward and kissed those parted lips. A straightforward, decisive touch.

Kaede's eyes widened in surprise but he did not attempt to move away. Akira smiled against his lips, his open eyes locked with Kaede's so close by as if to gauge his reaction. Finally, when no rejection was forthcoming, he reached forward and took Kaede's chin with his hand, tilting his face upwards to give himself a more comfortable position, and he let his eyes close, savouring every drop of this forbidden nectar.

Oh trespass sweetly urged! Give me my sin again.

Kaede's arms stayed useless and idle by his sides, neither moving to embrace the other boy nor to push him away. He was much too surprised to do anything; Akira had taken him at his weakest moment. He stood entirely still, accepting the kiss passively. But it might be noted that after a while his eyes slowly closed too.

-tbc

Version Updated: Dec 2018

Notes: Long chapter (and it won't be the only one)!

There was a bit more Kaede in this. It's nice to write from his POV, he's so deliciously angst lol.

Since the narrative jumps between the two boys quite a lot, I hope it wasn't too confusing.

"Self-alley-opp tensai-style" lol – just my little nod to Sakuragi-kun :P

As always, please leave a message, even if just to say "my toes are cold", "I'm hungry" or "let's think of 100 ways to give Kaede Rukawa a traumatic childhood and then write a fic about each one!"