AN: Song title from "Unwell" by Matchbox20.

And I'm a bit embarrassed. I did a allegory here I swore I'd never do but didn't realize until it was too late. Oh well. I guess I needed to get it out. Enjoy.

"Are you going to punish me?" Dianna asked.

Gourry watched Luna tensely as she sat down beside Dianna, "I imagine that the guilt that you are feeling right now is far worse than anything I could do to you."

Dianna buried her face in her hands as Luna continued, "Plus the destruction of your relationship with your sister. That may be irreparable."

"Luna…" Gourry said.

"At the same time, did you mother ever tell you what I did to her after she took those photos?" Luna asked.

"I deserve it." Dianna said.

Luna looked at her, "Where did the break down occur?"

"I got too big headed." Dianna said, "Years without an incident. I thought I'd beaten him. I was completely unprepared for a setback."

"I was also careless." Gourry said, "I should have been there waiting for you when that first interview was over."

Luna nodded, "I should have been keeping a closer eye myself. I think we all owe Min and Drake an apology."

"I would have gotten mad if you'd kept a tighter leash," Dianna said, "I would have insisted…"

"Helping you fight him is a responsibility all of us share. And you never asked for this." Gourry said firmly as he sat beside her and wrapped an arm around her. "There was a reason Ceiphied did what he did, because he expected your mother and I to be on it. We all got distracted."

"You have a right to expect me to grow up and shoulder this on my own one day." Dianna said.

Luna grabbed her face and turned it towards her, "That being inside you is strong. It overpowered Rezo the Red Priest, who was far older than you. I believe you are stronger, and part of that strength is the people in your life. No one has defeated Shabranigdu on their own. Your mother had your father's help, as well as a chimera's and Rezo's when she first defeated him. The second time Luke wanted to die and stacked the odds in her favor. Defeating him isn't something that someone does on her own. So, what are you going to do to ensure that this doesn't happen again?"

Dianna sighed, "I've already been spending all of my time with Dad in case I feel the urge to do something. Training starts tomorrow, I guess that will keep me busy. Focus on being the best midwife I can be. Stay away from Drake."

"And?" Luna prompted.

Dianna shook her head as if mystified by what else.

Luna got into her face, "Your mother has told me about that young man. Even before all this, getting involved with him was a stupid thought on your part. But if I catch you with him again then I will do to you what I did to your mother decades ago."

Gourry looked at Dianna and felt torn. While he shared the concerns that Lina and Luna had about Dianna pursuing a romance, and possibly settling down, marrying and having children of her own, he also didn't think it was realistic to prohibit her from pursuing it. Romance and intimacy were natural things to want, and rather strong drives to ignore. Still, though she looked pained, Dianna said, "I feel so bad about what I did to Min I couldn't possibly right now. It wouldn't be right."

"Hold onto that feeling." Luna said as she stood up. "Now I must be going. You, brother-in-law, keep a close eye on her."

Usually at night Min and Attie would be talking and laughing in their room even after the lights were off off while the light to Dianna's room remained on as she worked on her various projects. So it was strange that the house was silent and dark as Lina walked through it as she checked it before going to bed. But then after a day like today who wouldn't want to just go to sleep in the hopes that they would wake to find that it was all a dream? With a sigh Lina opened the door to the master bedroom. Gourry was already in bed, though his eyes were open and the light was on. "Hey." He said.

She closed the door behind her and grabbed her brush and started running it through her hair. "Hey." She replied.

"I still can't believe I didn't know something was up. That I wasn't there after the interview was over. I was so willing to believe the best…" Gourry said.

Lina put a hand on his knee. "And I was too willing to believe the worst."

"Huh?" he said.

"I felt something was off, and I thought Di was luring us into a false sense of security before she attacked. I didn't see that she was already in over her head and feeling guilt but didn't know how to ask for help." Lina explained. "That after it happened she went to you for help, well, that shows that she wants to do good, and here I was thinking she was going to attack Min at the first chance she got. That's what I can't get over. She's trying so hard and it's still not enough. Min's not going to see that, and part of me can't blame her."

"But if Di gets too discouraged…" Gourry said.

"She'll merge with him." Lina said as she laid in bed, "And I sure didn't help things by being willing to believe the worst."

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head, "Unfortunately our tendencies didn't cancel each other out this time."

Lina smiled wryly, "But there will always be the next time."

Dianna hoped that she looked calm and professional when she went to the temple. She was relieved when Julienne smiled warmly at her, not betraying any of the reticence she had felt about hiring her as she introduced her to the other midwives and showed her around. Dianna did her best to focus and pay attention, and to ask for things to do. Fortunately Julienne soon talked about rounds to check in on patients. "The first woman we'll see today is a rather tragic case." Julienne explained. "She's had four pregnancies, two miscarriages and two stillbirths. During the last pregnancy she caught an infection she's never recovered from and it was advised that she not get pregnant again. Still, she wanted a baby, and she is doing poorly. She still has two months to go, and this time I fear we'll have a dead infant and mother on our hands."

"What is being done for her?" Dianna asked.

"She is on strict bed rest. We are giving her the proper medicines but nothing much seems to work. Of course I don't think she'll be strong enough to undergo labor, but if we do a c-section we won't be able to use a healing spell…"

"Because that would make the infection worse." Dianna finished as she started to see the scope of the problem.

"I must caution, in a case like this we don't expect happy outcomes. I hate for this to be one of your first, but it does provide lessons in caution, as well as whether or not you can deal with the sorrows of this job."

"I don't want to give up on this before we've even begun!" Dianna said.

"Well, if you have any suggestions I will be willing to hear them." Julienne said as they got to a fancy looking house, and she knocked on the door. "Goodness knows this seems a damned if we do, damned if we don't situation. So no matter how unorthodox I'll likely try it."

A maid answered, and led them to an upstairs bedroom where a young woman was sleeping. "Hello, Beth." Julienne said as she gently shook her awake.

"Morning." Beth said.

"This is a midwife we are training, Dianna"

"Hi." Dianna said, but then she stood back as she observed as Julienne examined Beth. And as she did a growing intuition grew within her about what she needed to do. "If I may suggest something unorthodox?"

"Yes?" Julienne asked.

"Beth, I want you to walk with me down the hallway."

"I'm not sure I'm well enough for that." Beth said. "I feel so poorly. And they said that getting out of bed could send me into an early labor."

"My gut is telling me that won't happen." Dianna said, "Look, I know you want to meet this baby, right?"

"Yes!" Beth said.

"So we're going to need you to push when it's time. And for you to do that your muscles need to be strong. Laying in bed all the time causes them to waste away and you won't be strong enough to push when you need to. So we need to build your muscles up again."

Beth looked at Julienne, "Is she right?"

"That is one way of thinking. Not a common one, but I always say if one of my midwives has a gut feeling then she needs to trust it."

"Come on." Dianna said as she wrapped her arm around her and helped her out of bed, "It's just up and down the hallway today. And we'll work our way from there."

It was late in the evening when Dianna left the temple, heady from watching her first delivery. Everything about it had been delectable! The desire to hurt people was like a constant low level throb in her brain that occasionally grew to something she couldn't control. But now? She didn't feel it at all! Being around a laboring woman has satiated her need to feed on the pain of others. And she didn't lift a finger to cause it!

And then there was the euphoria that came with welcoming a new life into the world. This was what she was born to do, she knew it! If she could keep this job then she was sure that she'd never hurt anyone again. She'd only wished she'd found it before she'd tortured Drake.

Dianna felt as though ice water was poured on her as she remembered the conversation she'd had with her aunt. She exhaled a breath she was holding as she realized that she was thinking dangerously. No, the test of whether or not she would ever hurt someone again wasn't whether or not the low level throb was gone, but whether or not her jealousy could be triggered and she could resist the compulsion to hurt someone. Until that happened, she would have to be careful.

She looked at the sky. It was well past supper time, which would help her to avoid the awkwardness of staying out of Min's way. She nearly jumped out of her skin when she felt a presence behind her, and then Kenneth said, "I've been missing you."

Dianna put a hand over her heart. "I got the job. I've been busy."

"I heard. Congrats!"

"Thanks." Dianna said as she looked at the ground, once again regretting that this had happened after she'd attacked Drake. And suddenly she was feeling foolish for believing, yet again, that she could ever be over this, "Look, I have to end this now. I shouldn't have come onto you in the first place. I'm not right."

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I told you there were things about me you could never know. Things I thought I was past. Things I'm never going to be past. It was reckless of me to think otherwise."

"Dianna…"

"I've done horrible things. It's only a matter of time before you hear about them."

"I really don't care."

"You should!" she said sternly as she stopped to glare at him, feeling a pull between happy that he was fighting for being with her and agonized that she would have to end it, "Because I'm liable to do them, again and again! I'm not right! So I'd better stay away from you before I hurt you as well!"

Kenneth looked at her in bewilderment. She bit her lip as she turned around and headed home. Somehow she found the voice to say, "Goodnight."

"What's wrong with Dianna?" Kenneth asked Gourry as he ate at their house for dinner. As usual since Dianna had started training to be a midwife, she was out working.

Lina and Gourry locked eyes, and Gourry could sense Lina telling him that she had warned him. Min, meanwhile, said, "That's a rather rude question. Especially with all the help we've provided you."

"I'm sorry, I mean no offense. But she herself says that she's not right, but she won't say more than that. And I keep thinking, how can It be that bad? She seems fine."

"Dianna has spells." Gourry said.

"What do you mean?" Kenneth said.

"She has a hard time controlling her anger, and she's hurt a lot of people because of it." Gourry explained. "She tries hard to do better. Every time she thinks she's mastered it, though, something happens to prove her wrong."

"Many people have a hard time managing their anger." Kenneth said.

"I know. I'm one of them." Lina said sternly, "And Dianna makes me look like I have the patience of a saint! Look, if you haven't heard the stories by now, it's only a matter of time. Then you'll understand. Just know that she's not going to be able to do the things people do, like have romances and get married. Don't go there with her."

"Yet you expect her to work?" Kenneth said.

Everyone looked at each other nervously. Gourry said, "People need to have a purpose, a mission. Dianna can do that much."

"But what is wrong with her? Why can't she control her anger?"

"Just a reminder," Min said as she ate her salad, "It's rather rude to talk about people behind their backs. Kenneth, I've heard that they are going to recruit royal body guards soon. How is his training coming along, Dad?"

Lina threw open the front door, and found Gourry and Dianna sitting on the couch, talking. Lina grinned, "Di, stay right there."

Lina then grabbed Attie's arm and pulled her inside, followed by Min. Lina decided to ignore the tension that came with the two of them being in the same room at the same time. It had been a few weeks, and Lina was determined that Min put it aside for Attie, who blushed proudly as she opened her arms to show off her pale green robes. Lina, meanwhile, broke into a grin as she announced, "May I present to you Atalanta the Green!"

"I knew you could do it!" Dianna said as she got up to hug her, followed by Gourry.

"It was rather easy." Attie admitted, "I don't know why I was so worried about it."

"You worked hard." Gourry said, "We're proud of you."

Min put her arm around Lina, "Thank you for blazing the trail for us and ensuring that we were never cursed with pink robes."

"The sacrifices I made." Lina muttered.

"I don't know why you don't like the pink ones so much." Gourry said, "They look nice on you."

"Alright, then, you wear them." Lina said, and Min laughed.

"They wouldn't suit me at all."

"Anyway, I'm thinking we should all go out tonight, be a happy family and celebrate Attie's achievement." Lina said evenly as she hoped that they could be a family again.

Everyone looked nervously at Min, who stared at the ground for a moment, "I think we can manage that."

"Good." Lina said as she looked at her youngest and felt her heart swell with pride. "Come on, you get to choose where to eat tonight."

"So," Min said as she wrapped an arm around Attie, "Now that you have a color status, what are you planning to do?"

"I haven't decided yet," Attie said as they left the house, "I heard that they're looking for a detective with sorcery skills, and that seems interesting."

"If you find out who is doing the interviewing, let me know." Min said as they walked down the steps, "I'll see if I have a connection."

Attie's next words were an unexpected punch in the gut to Lina, who actually grabbed Gourry's arm when she heard them. "But I have considered traveling and going on my own journey."

Given that Lina had left home at that age, she knew it was irrational. Still, she couldn't help but to snap, "Not until you're thirteen! And then not until we've had a long talk!"

Even on her days off, Dianna went over to Beth's house to help her to take a walk. Beth did get stronger, even as Julienne remained pessimistic that both Beth and the baby would survive. Still, Dianna felt in her gut that there was reason to hope. And Beth did make it to term when she went into labor, if but barely.

Dianna heaved a sigh of relief as she caught the baby, who made a weak cry. Julienne's eyes widened as Beth stared at them in disbelief, "He's alive?"

"Yes. And he's beautiful." Dianna said as she placed the baby on Beth's chest.

"A bit smaller than we'd like. And bluer." Julienne said, "But alive."

Beth cried as she reached out to touch him. Julienne reached out to grab him, "I want to bring him to the wet nurse and let you rest."

"No!" Beth protested, "Please let me keep him!"

"I think we should." Dianna said as she placed a blanket over the baby and started to massage him through the blanket, hoping that he would liven and pinken. "I know in Saillune they wrap the babies' to their mother's chests. It helps stabilize both of their life signs."

"I'm willing to try it." Julienne said after she'd given it a moment's reflection. "I'd given up hope. But you've gotten us this far, perhaps you can see them the rest of the way through."

"I'm amazed." Julienne said as Beth slept with her infant alive and on her chest. "They are both doing incredibly well. I think sometimes we older midwives are so jaded by our failures that we start to protect ourselves by telling us nothing can be done to prepare for the worse and we fail to look for what can be done. I'm starting to think that they will pull through. Monica Joan, it appears, was right about you."

Dianna smiled as she packed her equipment, "Thank you."

"You have a gift for this." Julienne continued, "Perhaps I should have you speak about other techniques that are popular in Saillune."

"I would like that." Dianna said.

Julienne smiled as she watched Beth. "Beth's father is a Duke. I heard him telling his wife he was going to ensure that you were invited to the Festival Ball."

"What?" Dianna said as she nearly dropped her bag.

"Congrats!" Julienne said warmly as she patted her arm.

"Thanks." Dianna said, as she hoped that Julienne was wrong. Min and Drake would be at the Festival Ball. And after what she'd done, she would have no choice but to turn it down. Dianna exhaled and let the moment pass. She would be too busy with her work to worry about a stupid ball, she told herself. It was just the way it would have to be.