January 24th
Hermione never expected to find such peace in the happy, lively home belonging to Lee Jordan. Still feeling very much like an outsider even after over a full day and a half amongst them, she existed on the edges of the activity, silently watching the interactions between the loving family members. It was hard to see the wizard she had known as a child kiss his beloved wife or twirl one of his charming daughters around their cozy house without feeling a great deal of jealousy.
There had been laughter in Hermione's home. Sometimes tears even rolled out of their eyes as a joke struck a particularly amusing note or a story retold with all of the accents and inflections of those involved was performed. Very few would have ever guessed that her husband had a talent for mimicry. There were certain sides to his personality that he never showed to anyone outside of their home. Once upon a time it made Hermione feel special. Laughter was also common in her marital bed. The one place they could ensure complete and total privacy, there had been nights they stayed up long after the rest of the world had gone to sleep to talk and laugh. Even in their most intimate of moments, they could usually find reason to laugh. A bumped head on the headboard. A slip in the sheets. A strained muscle when their activities had either gotten a little too vigorous or a little too creative. It might have seemed to an onlooker that they were happy.
But she understood all too well that their family had been far from a happy one. It became even more evident the longer she spent around a family that was actually happy. She had been invited to join in all of the family's meals. Both of the Jordan girls, aged six and nine, were curious about their guest. The eldest whom everyone called Lizzie, was particularly so. Hermione had the distinct impression that the clever girl knew exactly who was sleeping down the corridor in their guest room. Though there was no element of fear in the bold manner in which Lizzie stared at her, she felt unnerved. Perhaps the girl was too clever for her own good.
She tried not to let the insatiable monster of envy take its hold inside her body. It was a fight she was destined to lose. How was it even possible to be so content and seemingly carefree when there was so much evil in the world? Perhaps Wales was an even more magical place than she realized. She wondered if she could find her own happiness there. Could the fresh start she was needing be found somewhere close by?
Late in the third night she was a guest, Hermione laid in her borrowed bed to think over the possibilities. It had been an all around surreal couple of days. There had been several people that had been kind to her when she was on the run. She remembered the man who bought her a meal right after New Year's. A twinge of guilt at the memory of lifting his wallet surprised her. Survival meant doing away with superficial worries and concerns about one's conscience. Had she begun reverting back to flashes of the morality her Muggle parents worked so hard to instill in her before their memories were altered? Was she forgetting what it was like to be desperate?
After breakfast, she'd had a long talk with Lee. His wife would flitter in and out of the kitchen as they spoke. It was evident that she was as curious to know what they were talking about as Hermione was to know what Lee would say next. He had been clear from the start that he wanted no trouble. Taking her from the police station before anyone else with less savory intentions could have been what he deemed a rash act, but one which he was hoping he wouldn't come to regret. Internally, Hermione hoped so as well.
"I have my girls to think about, Hermione. Please don't make me regret inviting you in my home."
She wanted to promise him that he would have no cause for remorse. It was, sadly, not a promise she was willing to make. There were too many variables. What if someone else knew that she'd been in a Cardiff Muggle police station? Lee couldn't possibly be the only person who had a spy working within their network. All it would take to discover what happened when she was picked up would be a few spells. And if the person casting them had no care for the life or sanity of the Muggles in question, they could learn a great deal. Maybe there were already some who knew she was in the Jordan home.
Once she gave him all of the assurances she was willing to give that she wouldn't personally harm anyone in his family, Lee returned her wand and her beaded bag. She was grateful for the weight in her pocket reminding her that she could run any time she wanted. Understanding all too well that any use of her wand would immediately bring Ministry officials and Death Eaters within their borders, invited or not, she vowed to not put them in any danger. It was the absolute least she could do to repay them for their kindness. Their completely undeserved kindness.
Sarah spent most of the rest of that first day ensuring that Hermione wanted for nothing. Recognizing a woman who hadn't enjoyed hot meals in a long time, she made excuses to keep cooking. When her guest's eyes lit up on their own when the suggestion of fresh biscuits was made, the cheerful hostess pointed her wand at the cupboards to summon the necessary ingredients. While they waited for the biscuits to bake and cool, she even washed every single piece of clothing and blanket Hermione carried inside her beaded bag. The dangerous Death Eater would have cried at the generosity if she even remembered how.
As her late-night thoughts drifted back to what her future was going to be from the recollections of the bizarre couple of days she'd experienced, she felt even more at a loss of her next steps. Returning to Hogsmeade was not an option. She knew there was only one option for leaving the Dark Lord's service entirely. It was a price she wasn't sure she was ready to pay just yet. Imagining returning to any sort of routine with the family she left behind left her almost breathless. How could she ever convince herself that they were happy and normal after spending even a single moment with the Jordan family? The lies she used to tell herself wouldn't work. She would know that they weren't a normal family and she had no doubt that she would come to resent them even more than she already did.
Staying in Wales was an attractive prospect. Within the neutral zone, perhaps she would be left alone. Lee and Sarah might even be able to help her find somewhere to stay and some kind of job to support herself. She lived under no delusions that the neighbors would likely ever fully accept her, but she didn't mind. Being alone sounded like a welcome prospect after so much time within the Dark Lord's Inner Circle. She was exhausted being around people. Maybe there was a quiet cottage in the middle of the country she could find. Ever since the woman with the farm had been kind to her, she hadn't been able to stop thinking about how lovely it would be to live somewhere similar.
But, every time she considered the possibility for even a moment she remembered the day that she finally left Hogsmeade. Not only would the Dark Lord not appreciate her running away permanently, she was certain that Antonin would never forget what it felt like to have a fork shoved in his eye. He'd already proven that he would keep searching for her no matter how long it took. Somehow violating the terms of a treaty didn't seem like a concern he would worry much about. He often felt like he was above the law. He wouldn't stop until he exacted his punishment. He would find her if she chose to stay in one place for too long.
She turned over in bed to rest on her side. Even inside the home of a family that hadn't yet tried to harm her, she kept a tight grip on her wand. There was danger everywhere. It was only a matter of time before it finally caught back up with her again. She had to be ready.