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Disclaimer: I own no source material.

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Chapter 8: HOTD Zombies Part 4: Meeting the Main Cast

Jafar smiled into the screen as he looked at the teen before him. "Takashi huh?" The Japanese name rolled off his tongue nostalgically. 'Feels like years since I've last spoken in Japanese, wait, what language have I been speaking?'

It had only been a bit over sixth months since his new life began, and yet his 'normal' life already seemed like a fantasy dream.

Considering he was sitting half naked on a small hill of human corpses that used to be zombies until he stabbed them through the head with an alien spear while a demon raccoon trapped in a ring on his finger gave commentary, he was pretty sure this was his new normal.

He shrugged and removed a pack of cigarettes from his ring as Takashi answered. "Yes sir, who am I speaking with?" It was his first conversation with someone not named Alfred or a zombie in six months. Zombies were better conversation partners.

"I am Jafar. Not to be rude, but you mind putting the phone in front of Bob for a minute? I want to hear from my little buddy."

Takashi blinked and mouthed 'Bob' silently in confusion but Bob heard him just fine and stuck his shelled face into the camera. "Shed!"

Jafar's manic smile dimmed a bit as he smiled warmly at his friend. "Hey bud, how you doing."

"Shed, shedin."

He lit his cigarette and inhaled with a chuckle. "Hm, that's good to hear. How's the journey been? You're not pushing yourself too much right?"

"Shed! Shedinja, shed."

"Really?"

"Shed."

"Haha and his names Tom?"

"Shed, shedin."

"She can cross the ocean?"

"Shed!"

"Hahaha alright, alright. We can talk all about it later. Give me a status update."

Shedinja saluted him and started speaking his name for a full three minutes while everyone else in the room with Bob sweat dropped.

Saya, a pink haired intellectual genius and tomboyish girl, leaned over to Saeko, a purple haired swordswoman, and whispered. "Is that thing speaking in some kind of code?"

Saeko hummed and narrowed her eyes at the floating Bob but shook her head. "I don't think so. I can't hear any inflection of change between one word to the next."

Kohta, a muscled teen who looked like he recently lost a great deal of weight, leaned forward on a reversed chair and hummed. "I don't know; that guy seems to understand him. Anyone else still wondering how the hell he has a cell signal?"

Saya growled lowly in annoyance at the reminder. It should have been impossible with the cell towers down. "I really want to take apart that phone and find out."

""Don't."" Saeko's answer was almost instantaneous with Rika, a fellow woman with purple hair yet dark skin in a military outfit. The two women matched eyes and nodded while Saeko explained to her allies. "That man is dangerous. He is far too casual and comfortable sitting on a hundreds of corpses he likely killed himself. He has the eyes of a predator, and his first glance at Takashi was evaluating if he was prey or not."

Rika clicked her tongue leaning on the wall behind them. "Just the way he speaks reminds me of some of the veterans who had seen some shit. I'm not saying he's an enemy but be wary."

The other two teens paled at their words and Saya squashed every instinct to steal the phone. Kohta meanwhile added in helpfully. "Besides, isn't that thin…Bob I guess. Isn't bob the one they call the angel of heaven who leads that monster team that had been cleaning out China of undead?"

The allies shared uncomfortable looks at that. The military figures who showed up at their base to talk were downright fanatical about their support for Bob. They had nine fortress's set up across southern China all connected by moderately safe paths and kept the supply of resources going to care for close to fifty thousand people.

It wasn't yet at religious faith, but the fanaticism was scary to see in such a large group. Meeting Bob had done a bit to downplay that seeing how innocent it looked. But now realizing it worked for someone else made things scary again.

"Alright bud, I think I got it. You did amazing you know that? You're the best Shedinja a guy could ask for."

"Shed!"

"Haha I believe it. Give the phone back to Takashi would you?"

Jafar's voice rang out in the room and brought everyone back to silence as Takashi took the phone again. "Hello? Jafar-san?"

Jafar chuckled. "It's just Jafar man. It's the apocalypse, don't sweat the small stuff."

Takashi felt the humor was infectious and shared the chuckle. "Yeah, I guess so. So, do you think you could answer some questions for us?"

"Shoot man, I got about ten minutes to talk but then I gotta get back to things. You know how it is. I only need a minute so you start." The fact that he saw forms already growing closer in the distance made him question if ten minutes were too much, but Jafar could handle it.

Takashi nodded and went on, manfully ignoring Jafar's lack of a shirt and his choice in seating. Sometimes you just got knee deep in bodies these days. "Alright, where are you based out of?"

"Australia."

A few eyes widened at that. "Australia? How many survivors do you have?"

"Survivors?" Jafar looked at him curiously before understanding from what Bob told him. "Ah, you mean like how you guys have a bunch of bases right?"

Takashi nodded unsurely. He thought the question was rather straightforward. "Yeah."

"None."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me man. None. Hahaha, Australia got fuucked~."

There were more than a few cold breaths of air at that. Australia wasn't the most populace filled place, but it still had around twenty five million residents. "N-none?! What? How!?"

Jafar shrugged. "No idea bud. Been to almost every main city of the west coast of this place and didn't see a living soul. Well, not counting that goddamn crackhead who almost married me to a zombie and the fucking wildlife. You know the kinda shit they got down here? Man, you do not want to fuck with a kangaroo. They do not like hugs, or marriage, I tried. There could be more people in the east but I'm kinda busy over here."

The room went silent and Bob buzzed something that made Jafar laugh. "No, but I'll try that next time."

By this point most people in the room were wondering on Jafar's sanity and Takashi chose to push on. "Alright, well, how many people are fighting with you? Do you have a team?"

Jafar's smile at that question was definitely not sane. He pointed his burning cigarette at the screen and answered. "Counting me? Me."

This time even Takashi was floored. "W-what? Do you need help?! We can try to get a rescue ship down there!"

Jafar laughed loudly and shook his head while ashing in a corpses mouth. "I'm good man, trust me. I'm doing plenty fine on my own."

{"Fine is one way to put it meatbag."}

Jafar's laughing face abruptly twitched and frowned as he looked off screen. "So much help you are Alfred, why don't you pick up a rock or something."

{"Why don't I shove a rock up your ass!"}

"Yeah, you and what arm?"

{"I will stab you one day."}

Jafar rolled his eyes and turned back to the camera. "Alright, alright, counting me it's one and a half."

{"Oi!"}

"Tell me I'm wrong."

{"…"}

"That's what I thought."

Takashi looked unsure. "Right, then you and…Alfred?"

A glutaral inhuman voice shouted back promptly. {"MY NAME . IS NOT . ALFRED! I WILL KILL YOU ALL!"}

There was a banging sound off screen as Jafar came back into focus. "Don't mind him, he gets a bit.. OW! DON'T BITE ME!"

Everyone in the room jumped to their feet in shock as Takashi grabbed the phone and shouted into the receiver. "Jafar?! Did a zombie bite you?!"

The screen waved around too fast for anyone to see much except something large and orange colored as Jafar's voice went in and out in volume screaming and the secondary voice belonging to someone named Alfred just laughed.

There were more than a few concerned looks sent Bob's way but the little guy seemingly just floated there peacefully. Hell, he wasn't even looking at the screen but a coffee cup.

"Alright, I'm sorry! You happy?!"

The screen finally stopped waving around as Jafar came back into focus with a frazzled look. "Sorry about that, Paul was not happy to not be included. Its two and half. Final count. Any zombie who disagrees is getting stabbed. I'm looking at you Scrub."

Sweat drops around were his only answer accompanied by Bob nodding his head in understanding. Paul deserved to be counted.

Takashi awkwardly continued. "Er…um…so you didn't get bit by a zombie?"

Jafar focused back on him. "Huh? You mean right now? Nah, no way. Well, there was that one from a couple months ago when I got dared into doing some WWE moves, very bad idea I might add, but it turned out fine."

Rei Mayamoto, Takashi's girlfriend and someone who easily got heated had enough and yelled back. "Excuse me?! How are you not a zombie if you got bit by one!?"

Jafar just looked at her like she was stupid and it infuriated her even more. "What are you talking about girl? I got bit in the arm; I just removed it."

Rei paled at that. "You…removed it?"

"Yeah, it was annoying. Don't worry, I grew a new one back."

"You…grew…" Rei sat back down and moved out of the camera's view with a pale face.

Takashi himself was at a loss for words so this time Saeko stepped forward and picked up the phone. "Sir Jafar, my name is Saeko, would you be kind enough to share what Bob's purpose is here?"

Jafar eyed the new girl with a raised brow and winked. "Damn girl, I like those eyes. You ever want to go get all bloody and sweaty, give me a heads up."

A few people blanched at that but Saeko hid a small blush at the idea. She had backed away from her interest in Takashi due to his and Rei's relationship, so her only outlet these days was the blood pumping excitement of tearing flesh apart with her blade. "Perhaps. But the question?"

Jafar chuckled and leaned his chin on the back of a wrist. "Bob's purpose ties into what I wanted to share with you anyway, so I'll make this quick. Looks like I've got some guests coming, so I'll be busy in a few minutes."

"We can always schedule another time if you need to prepare?"

"Ha! I like you woman, but people like us don't need to prepare. We're either fighting or were not."

Saeko's eyes twinkled but she didn't say anything else and Jafar got the hint. "Heh, fine. Alright, here's the laydown for anyone listening.

I don't got all the answers you might want, but I know some shit.

I know how this all started. And I know how to find the place it started from and end it.

The Job I gave Bob ties into that. The only way I can learn where it started from is if at least 25% of the zombie population is killed off. Bob's job is extermination. Of course, the little guy got a soft spot for kids and wants to secure any survivors with a safe nest, but that's his call. I won't stop him from that."

Pindrop silence extended to the whole room at his words before it all exploded at once with people talking. Not just the introduced characters but the military and organizational members in the background who were listening in.

Jafar pushed the screen away from his face with a wince. "Oi, did I not say I was on a timer here? That phones only got a few charges anyway and I'm the only one who can charge it. So, don't waste my time."

Somehow his annoyed words conveyed through the phone and more than a few flinched as they swore they saw a shadowy tendril and eyeball form behind his head. But they blinked and it was gone.

Of course, the point about the phones charge was a lie to make them not annoy him with calls. He gave it to Bob, not them.

Saeko was the first to speak. "We apologize, that was simply very big news. Can you elaborate a bit Jafar?"

Jafar shrugged. "Like I said, I don't got all the answers. If you're going to ask me on the 'how's' then I got nothing for you. Believe me or don't, I really don't care. I'm doing this more for Bob then you, I won't lie. But you people and your forces can speed up the process if you get on board."

Saeko silenced a few speakers with a sharp look. "That's fine, please share."

Jafar cracked a smile at her. "I knew I liked you. Anyway, some moron, or maybe a group of morons? Sounds like something a group of em would do. They cracked open a dimensional door for a promise of power, got duped by a lich who wanted more souls, and said lich threw a bunch of zombies through the portal to convert the population." Now more of them were sure he was insane.

"It only cares about human souls as well, seeing as animal life went untouched." A few considered that point. "Well, until an animal went and ate a human and now the animal kingdom is fucked, but hey, at least we got fish."

{"Only your happy about that."}

"Shut up Alfred."

The byplay was so natural no one could even interrupt to argue his point as Jafar went on like nothing happened.

"Oh and this is just stage one of the plan for it. As far as its concerned, your all gonna be dead in the next year and a half." That got a lot of alarmed looks. Even if he was crazy, the idea that there was something more was not comforting.

Saeko was one of the few that felt different about it. She thrived in combat. "And what would the next stage be?"

Jafar blinked. "Oh right. Well, after a year passes from the last time a zombie ate a living being, they will begin cannibalizing each other to evolve into ghouls and banshees. The good news is you don't gotta worry about becoming a zombie anymore. Bad news, there will be new kids on the block. Ghouls are at least vulnerable to fire but banshees will ignore live ammunition not primarily made of iron. Zombies are relatively easy to kill if you hit the head; these two will not be. Neither have an easy weak spot, so hit them until they go down for good, better yet, set them all on fire."

The room was completely silent with concerned faces and Bob found an office plant to use [Absorb] on. Everyone kept talking and he was getting hungry.

Saeko swallowed and composed herself first, hiding a trace of expectation for more challenges ahead from her voice that no one in the room would appreciate. "And how does killing 25% of the undead help you?"

"I can find where the rift that was opened in the first place is and close it. Once the lich's connection is cut, the undead should either outright die, become much weaker, and or just stop evolving before some real monster is born that kills us all."

"You realize that your saying 25% of all zombies? We don't even have an estimate on how many people survived so far. And that's not counting the animal kingdoms."

"Don't sweat the small stuff, I'll know when it hits there. The zombies evolving actually helps cuz they will condense from fuck you numbers to simpler numbers. Makes it easier percentage wise, not so much surviving wise I'm afraid. I'm sure you will be fine with Bob around though."

One of the older military men smashed his fist on a table and stood up. "This is preposterous! How do we know that any of that is true? This is real life, not a fantasy!"

Jafar and looked off screen at the approaching shambling figures as he spoke. "You don't. I told you that. I'm not saying this to convince you. From a militant standpoint, it's better to know and not need than need and not know, correct?"

The old military general steamed at the clearly insane youth but couldn't deny the point and sat back down.

Jafar went on ignoring him. "Well, you will find out either way in five to six months. So, it's on you whatever you decide to do."

Saeko spoke up then. "And what will you be doing Jafar?"

The manic smile he responded with did things to her better left unsaid. "I'll clean up Australia."

The statement was as baffling as it was arrogant and yet none could deny the face he made when he said it.

{"Meatbag, incoming."}

Jafar looked off screen again and sighed as he stood up. "Well, that's all the time I got boys and girls. Takashi, I like the look in your eyes. Saeko, I'd rail you on top of a mountain of corpses any day. Old man, don't let people die for pride. And Bob, stay classy."

"Shed!"

The call cut out and the room descended into silence before Kohta spoke up loud enough for everyone to hear. "Is everyone going to ignore the fact that he was basically naked the whole call?"

Not a single woman there chose to respond as none of them met Kohta's eyes and an older woman coughed into her hand with a light blush as she steered the conversation toward how to act on the information they just received.

Rika was the only one who noticed Saeko stepped outside to get some air after returning the cell phone to a happily buzzing Bob talking with his Locust female friend and smirked.

The next day, Bob gave a speech to his people that no one understood, but somehow conveyed that everything would be alright if they kept killing zombies and improving their defenses.

Whether people believed in Jafar's words or not, they would at least prepare all they could in case it was true.

Meanwhile, back with Jafar. "Looks like Bob's doing good huh?" He commented while expertly stabbing a zombie in the face while Alfred scoffed.

{"You sure you weren't focused on that human girl, dipshit?"}

"Oh! New insult? And hell yeah, she was hot."

{"Yeah, I felt like meatbag was getting a little old, have to keep it fresh you know?"}

"Perfectly understandable."

{"Thank you. What were we talking about again?"}

"I don't know, I got bored after talking to Bob."

{"Oh right, you gave them a lot of info there for free."}

Jafar shrugged and slashed the head off a zombie before spearing it midair and flinging it to trip up a new one. "I don't really consider it free. Bob said he wanted them to live, so I gave them some advice. If they believe it or not isn't my problem. Plus, if they kill more undead, we can find the source faster."

Alfred hummed and corrected his form a bit before answering. {"Not a bad plan."}

"Yeah, two fish with one spear you know?"

{"You and your fish obsession."}

"WHAT ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO EAT!"

{"You try vegetables?"}

"THIS IS A DESERT CONTINENT."

{"Eat a cactus, I don't know."}

"YOU CAN'T JUST….hm…maybe. I'll try that later."

{"Glad I could help."}

"Appreciate it. Anyway, how are you going to find the source after 25% of undead die? I never really asked."

Alfred chuckled darkly. {"Don't worry about it. I'll explain how my ability works to you later. Just know that I specialize in soul energy, and the demon involved in this little shit show is an amateur at hiding his soul imprint in these things."}

Jafar shrugged in ignorance and focused on what he knew how to do. Stabbing things with a pointy object.

Chapter end.