November 9th
Hermione's life had simply become one long series of questions that never seemed to have any answers. When it felt like she finally had the answer to a question she'd been confused about for months, at least three more would pop up in its place. Would there ever come a day when she knew it all? When she no longer had to worry and wonder about her future? Unlikely. She assumed that she would only have her answers at the same time that she experienced the peace of death. Of course, as she didn't truly understand what happened after one died, it was possible that there would be mysteries that never had resolutions. The very thought depressed her beyond measure. For someone that desired answers above most others, it was positively maddening to not understand what was happening.
One person that confused her was Kingsley Shacklebolt. Though not the person who confused her the most, he nonetheless was present in her thoughts quite frequently. When it would seem like she understood why the wizard was behaving the way he was, something would happen or he would say something that made her doubt her previous beliefs. He was a mysterious man with a past that she knew he wasn't telling her everything about. As the last remaining member of the Shacklebolt family, it was up to him to represent the proud Pureblood family that held a great deal of influence in their society once upon a time. He was exactly the sort of person that Rodolphus would seek out to complete his Wizengamot scheme.
Kingsley urged Hermione weeks earlier not to make any rash decisions about Rodolphus until she learned about his plans. Was that his way of saying that at least in that instance he felt that Rodolphus was better for his survival than Antonin? She was unsure of everything. While she knew that Rodolphus was open with her about his plans, she wasn't foolish enough to believe that he told her everything. That was complete madness. He would never let anyone get close enough to know all of his secrets. How did Kingsley factor in to all of the parts of Rodolphus' plans that she didn't know?
There was only one possible way she thought she might be able to get more answers. War wasn't fought entirely on the battlefield. That had been a lesson learned the hard way more times than she wanted to recount. No, it was most often fought in back alleys or private meetings. It was scheming and spying and dozens of other underhanded tactics. While a Gryffindor might desire to rush out into the heat of the battle and fight with blood and viscera, it was hardly the most effective way to win. Strategy didn't always come easy to the ones that admired courage and daring, but it was necessary.
When the door opened to Kingsley's flat, he wasn't surprised to see Hermione standing just outside. Maybe he was even convinced that she would've come earlier than she did. It wasn't like her to keep away for very long when she knew someone had answers she wanted after all. The handsome former auror simply stepped back to allow her entrance into his humble home.
"Don't you have a job? How are you always home when I come here?"
It was hardly the first question she really wanted the answer to, but it was the first one that tumbled out of her mouth. Kingsley only laughed. Part of her felt like a petulant child annoyed that something silly she said amused the adults when she was trying to be serious. He pointed to a closed laptop computer on his dining table. Papers were neatly stacked beside it.
"Muggles are amazing. I never have to leave home to complete my work."
She rolled her eyes. It wasn't the life that she expected the wizard to really desire. Years earlier when they were still fighting on the same side, she assumed that he would one day rise to the top of the Ministry and become the Minister for Magic. Something about his commanding presence seemed made for the office. She would've gladly worked in the Ministry under his leadership. Their world would likely have been much better if the final battle's outcome was different.
"Are you on Rodolphus' side?"
There was no reason to delay the blunt discussion she wished to have with Kingsley. He didn't appear to be taken aback by the question. Once he'd settled down in his armchair and she was perched on the edge of his sofa, he responded. Just another reminder that there was only one man that he fought for. She was frustrated enough with his refusal to answer her question the way she wanted it answered that she considered leaving his flat for good. What was the point in remaining if he was going to do nothing but make her angry?
"But you've been working with my husband for years."
"Yes, when it suited me and was in my own best interests."
Something about the wizard made her feel like a teenager again. Maybe it was because of all of the conversations they used to have over tea while they sat at the kitchen table in Number Twelve. Even back then he was careful with the words he used. Vague answers and riddles were often spoken. She rolled her eyes again, not even caring that she was nearing forty.
"I hate when you don't answer my questions, Kingsley. It's infuriating."
"But I did answer them, my dear."
"Don't be patronizing. It's unattractive."
He laughed again. For once, it wasn't a sound that she liked. Hermione began to regret ever coming by his flat in the first place. What was she really hoping that she would learn? Kingsley had already proven that he wasn't just going to reveal all of his secrets simply because she asked him nicely. He knew how the game was played.
"If you've been working with Antonin for so long, why didn't you tell him that I was here when you found me?"
"Because like I said before, I worked with your husband when it suited me and was in my own best interests. What would I have to gain by telling him where you were? It seemed like a domestic squabble that I didn't want to get involved with. Besides, why would you have attacked your own husband unless you were in danger? I do still possess a conscience, Hermione. I didn't want to put you back in a position where you could've been hurt again."
It was a more honest answer than she expected. There had been a lot to think about since she discovered yet another secret alliance that she'd been unaware of. She'd wondered why Kingsley didn't immediately turn her back over to Antonin when she was laying on his sofa covered in her own sick. Surely he didn't actually enjoy caring for her while she was going through the process of withdrawal from her potions.
"Speaking of your husband, he was here yesterday. Very angry too. I'm worried about his blood pressure. Has he had it checked by a Healer?"
"Why was he mad?"
"Because it looks like someone he believed to be an ally of his double-crossed him. Lestrange asked Augustus Rookwood to take over the Ollivander seat on the Wizengamot. Thanks to his recent marriage, he's been promoted to Lestrange's inner circle."
Hermione wondered if she should seek out Antonin to tell him the truth of the plan she made at Augustus' kitchen table. When they'd had their horrible fight, she'd had every intention of telling him. Once she dropped Antonin's watch, she no longer had a way to track him. It seemed safer that way. She didn't know what was happening between them, if it could be fixed or even if she wanted it to be fixed.
She pushed aside the depressing reminders of her failing marriage to focus on the silver lining in the news she'd just received. With Augustus offered a seat, she could fulfill her promise to make him a widower. There was nothing stopping her from seeking Alecto out and giving her the bloody painful death she'd wanted to give her ever since she discovered the bitch's betrayal. Remembering the fun she'd had with Thorfinn when he killed Aubin, she decided that she would confide in the wizard the promise she made to Hannah about Alecto. No doubt he would want to help get rid of the sister of the monster who harmed his wife so after the final battle. Thorfinn could be the one to tell Antonin the truth about Augustus. After all, he had one of those damned mirrors. He wouldn't have any trouble getting into contact with her husband.
Deciding that she'd had enough of being in Kingsley's flat without getting proper answers, Hermione decided to be blunt. He was the sort of man to appreciate bald honesty after all. Maybe it would work in her favor.
"Do you see Rodolphus as being your way to get back into the wizarding world?"
It was foolish and naïve to believe that he hadn't already been approached by Rodolphus. For reasons she couldn't possibly understand, it was important to the man that the Wizengamot be stocked entirely with Purebloods. She hated that despite being in the twenty-first century, their society was still so backward. Would they ever catch up with Muggles? She highly doubted it. They were still so enmeshed in a disagreement that had already lasted over a thousand years. Half-bloods and Muggle-borns would always be second-class citizens in their eyes. A million years ago when she was young and idealistic and the reality of life hadn't crushed her innocence, Hermione actually thought she might want to one day tackle the pro-Pureblood laws. Maybe she could even be the Minister for Magic. Just thinking about it only made her stomach churn. She didn't have the energy or the desire to change the world. She simply wanted to survive.
Kingsley was in no rush to answer her question. That in itself was telling. For a man who spent over twenty years on the outside of the world he'd grown up in, it had to have been tempting to be allowed back in, especially with a modicum amount of power that his position as the Shacklebolt family representative on the Wizengamot would provide. She knew all too well how lonely it felt being away from the wizarding world and she'd only done it for less than a year.
"You're not really on Antonin's side, are you?"
Still he said nothing. Kingsley simply stared. He didn't appear uncomfortable, just unwilling to tell her what she wanted to know. Frustrated that once again she had more questions than answers, Hermione stood to her feet. There was no attempt to get her to remain.
Secret alliances had a way of coming back to bite the ones involved when they least expected it. As much as she always admired Kingsley when she was younger, most of her hoped that he would be the one burned, not her husband. She slammed Kingsley's front door shut behind her, promising that she wouldn't return. Not if he was going to remain so tight-lipped and secretive. She had enough men in her life who wouldn't tell her what she wanted to know. One more was likely to drive her completely round the bend, something she was already afraid had happened.
It was tempting to seek out her husband to tell him her suspicions about Kingsley. Didn't he deserve to know that the wizard only cared about what happened to himself? If Antonin relied too heavily on him, he might get himself hurt or worse. Only her pride kept her from trying to find her husband. Surely he already knew who could be trusted and who couldn't.
She loathed Kingsley. It was unlikely that she would ever change her mind. Another part of her childhood was cruelly ripped away. There was a time that she respected the former auror. Those days were over.