August – September 1815

20th August 1815

Mr. D,

LM died; G is fine.

R

Towards the end of August Darcy received the expected note from Mr. Reynolds. They had agreed on the code they would use to communicate in case the letter fell into the wrong hands. Although he did not have any kind of tender feelings for his wife, her death saddened him. On the other hand, a girl was born, which made his decision easier.

He remembered the first time he was intimate with his wife again was on December 10th, two days after he arrived in London. The girl could be his, although he had too many doubts.

He immediately went to Scotland to make all the necessary arrangements for Lady Maria's burial at Pemberley. The girl was very small, but according to the wet nurse and midwife, she was going to be fine. Mr. Reynolds gave Darcy a letter that his wife had written to him the day before the childbirth.

16th August 1815

Mr. Darcy,

It is strange to write a letter that you will only read if I die in childbirth. Honestly, sometimes I would rather die since I know my future is going to be even worse than death.

The last letter my family sent me was two months ago; they are furious with me because you want to divorce me for adultery. My father had a heated argument with Lord Matlock because he supports your decision.

I know that even if I beg you on my knees and swear before God that I am going to be an exemplary wife from now on, you will not believe me and you will go ahead with the divorce. In these months you have never responded to any of my letters, and it is clear you do not care in the slightest about what happens to me or what I feel.

I admit that I was wrong; I never should have done what I did. Why did I do it? I have asked myself that question thousands of times. The honest answer is Sir Thomas was very attentive to me, he made me feel beautiful and loved, he flattered me and said everything I wanted to hear. I never felt loved or desired by you.

Believe me, I am very sorry for my actions, but it is unfair that I have to pay for life for that mistake. I know you have a mistress named Elizabeth, as I heard you say her name twice after being intimate on the few times you exhaustedly fell asleep next to me. You were unfaithful first, and yet your life continues as before.

The irony is probably none of your acquaintances and friends care in the slightest that you have a mistress or a lover, many of them are even likely to congratulate you. However, if you go through with the divorce I will be considered a woman of low morals, and I will have the same respect and consideration as a cheap courtesan.

Even if you do not believe me, I am almost sure the child I am expecting is yours. I was only intimate with Sir Thomas five times and we were always very careful. I also swear to you that I ended my affair with Sir Thomas when I found out I was pregnant since I wanted our marriage to improve for our child.

If you are not convinced this child is yours and you want to give it up for adoption, the only thing I beg of you, is you use the money from my dowry to ensure he or she has a good life.

Lady Maria.

Darcy returned to Pemberley with the little girl and christened her Anne Darcy. Lady Maria was buried at Pemberley churchyard.

End Part II