He gave me the name Zaugustus. Whether that was his given name, or an alias, we didn't know. Saying that he was a slave runner implied that he merely provided the transport, but the deeper we dug, the bigger his network grew. He was a cartel King who had built his empire on stealing people, and had a massive trafficking ring throughout the galaxy.

He did Hux's dirty work, he was particularly skilled at making people disappear, and in exchange, Hux kept him and his exploits off the radar.

I had little choice but to return to Mustafar while Ushar sent his spies to find what they could. I abandoned my other duties, and put all of my efforts into finding him.

I felt Rey's absence like a missing limb, seeing the loss of her everywhere. I couldn't sleep in our bed, couldn't even stand walking into our bedroom and not finding her there. Every time I closed my eyes, it wasn't my own memories that overtook me, but Hux's. When I dreamt of her, it wasn't the dreams of us being happy together, it was of what I saw happen to her, and the fact that my happy moments with her were replaced with the last thing I saw of her, had me seeking the familiar oblivion at the bottom of a bottle.

I told myself, when I'd taken that first drink, that it was just so that I could sleep. It wasn't the first lie to myself, and it wouldn't be the last.

When I didn't pass out in my office from exhaustion, I slept on the chaise in Vicrul's room. He'd been moved as soon as he was strong enough, and would be in our infirmary until he was cleared. My surgeons did what they could to repair the damage to his shoulder, but it'd been so extensive and there was more work that needed to be done.

I heard the door to my office softly close late one night.

"Anything?" I asked, not turning as I studied a map of known cartel runs.

But, Ap'lek didn't answer, and I looked over my shoulder.

To see a young woman dip into a small curtsey.

She wore an off the shoulder, cobalt blue gown, the color contrasting well with her porcelain skin, and her sunset red hair was braided up, putting her angular face on display. Her square jaw, her high cheekbones, her straight nose, and her full lips. Her russet brown eyes met mine as she stood.

I gasped, taking several steps back until I rammed into my desk. Though she hadn't said a word to me, I knew exactly who she was and I could not, I was not in a mental state to speak to her.

"I'm-"

"I know who you are." I snapped. In the way that didn't fucking matter, she was my wife. I'd been actively avoiding her since she got here because I wanted absolutely nothing to do with her. An awkward silence fell over us while she chewed on the inside of her cheek.

My heavy sigh broke the tension between us, and I pulled the top off of the decanter on my desk. "Is there-" I poured a drink. "Something that you need?" I turned my glass up, draining it.

She shook her head, her drop earrings dangling from her ears, and catching the light as they swayed. "I just wanted to meet you."

Her huge, round eyes were innocent, untainted by the harsh realities of this galaxy. They stared into me, and I set my jaw, pouring another drink.

Rey had had that same look in her eyes the first time I'd seen her. They were so much alike in circumstance, and it was stirring memories in me that I was in no way prepared to deal with. The scotch warmed the hollow ache in my chest as I drank, then poured another.

"Well, we've met." I said, and downed the shot. "So, good night."

A line formed between her red eyebrows. "Aren't we…" She trailed off, and I let out a frustrated sigh, closing my eyes.

"No." I set my glass down, and picked up the bottle, taking a long swallow from it.

"No?" She echoed.

"No." I repeated, anger filtering into my tone. "I don't know what you were going to ask, but the answer is no." I turned the bottle up.

Hurt flashed in her doe-like eyes. "We're married."

"No we are fucking not!" I snarled. "You're not my wife."

Her voice shook when she said, "What about the contract-"

"FUCK the contract!" I screamed, and she flinched, her impossibly large eyes widening further. "Fuck the official who bought you, fuck your demented ass parents for selling you, and fuck whatever it is you think you are to me!"

The door behind her burst open, and Aplek was there, his blond eyebrows drawn into a tight line. He eyed me, the bottle I still held by the neck, and then his gaze lifted to the young woman in front of me, just as two fat tears slid down her delicate face.

She held her chin high, her dark eyes not leaving mine as she curtseyed. "Supreme Leader." She said, and left, breezing past Ap'lek, who still stood in the doorway.

I turned the bottle up, and he rushed forward, snatching it from me. "The fuck is wrong with you?"

I gave him an incredulous look. "What's wrong with me?" I screamed. "Rey is fucking gone!"

"So you take it out on an innocent girl?" He demanded. "This is not her doing, and it's not her fault. She had as little to do with this as you did."

But, it was my fault. I'd known that this could happen. I knew that the Official was ruthless. The second that I realized I'd actually wanted to be married to Rey, I should have had the contract annulled, or redrawn, or fuck, i should have done something. I should have killed Hux after the first time he put his hands on her, and weathered whatever fallout came.

I could have prevented this, and I hadn't. It was my fault she was taken by the Official, it was my fault she was sold. It was my fault Hux had-

My knees buckled, and I fell, burying my face in my hands as my breath sawed out of me in quick gasps.

Ap'lek knelt beside me. "Breathe." He commanded, softly.

I couldn't. My chest was too tight, I couldn't take in enough air.

I was vaguely aware of Ap'lek calling a medic, and I wanted to object, I wanted to tell him that I would get control of myself and to leave me alone. But, he knew better. He'd seen this before, seen me like this before.

I don't know when the medic arrived, don't know what they gave me, or how they gave it to me, but the next morning, I woke up in my bed, fully clothed in my rumpled slacks and button down. I laid there, staring at her pillow, and couldn't help but remember waking up on my back and finding her sprawled across my chest. I would trace the knots of her spine with my fingertips, bury my face in her hair and breathe her in, the smell of jasmine and vanilla and...Rey.

The pain was a gnawing ache, accompanied by a pounding in my head, which turned to splitting when my door opened, and slammed shut.

"Good morning!" Ap'lek boomed, stomping toward me and loudly rattling a bottle of aspirin before emptying two into his palm and offering them to me.

"Asshole." I groaned, taking them, and the glass of water he held out.

He turned, and sank into a nearby chair, watching me as he leaned back.

"What have you found?" I asked.

He shook his head. "Nothing from Ushar. We got a possible lead, and I sent Kuruk and Cardo. They haven't gotten back."

I drained the water, and put it on my nightstand, seeing Rey's datapad light up with an incoming call. Ovadia.

Fuck. She didn't know.

I waited for her call to end, and moved to get up when it did, only for my datapad to go off almost immediately with another call from her.

I couldn't tell her. I couldn't handle her questions, and I didnt have any answers, anyway.

The screen went black and I looked up at Ap'lek, who was still watching me. "What?" I snapped. "Waiting for me to go into another panic attack? Or, fall into hysterics again?"

He sighed. "I know that this is difficult-"

"No, you don't know." I'd wasted so much time fighting my feelings for her. I'd denied it when everyone else saw the truth. And, even when I couldn't deny it, I still couldn't admit it. I loved her, and I hadn't been able to say it to her. "You can't even begin to know."

He lifted his chin. "That's fair."

I scoffed, and moved to stand, stumbling on my feet, and had to sit back down.

"Do you have any idea what you did last night?" He asked, and I glanced up at him.

"I didnt make any headway in the search for the cartel, if that's what you're asking." I said.

"That's actually not what I'm asking."

I searched my foggy and fragmented memory, but couldn't think of what he might be referring to.

His expression didn't change. "The princess of Cyrilla tried to speak with you, and you screamed at her until she left your office crying."

Fuck. I made her cry? That actually made me feel worse. "Will you talk to her?" I asked. "Apologize? Explain things for me?"

He raised an eyebrow. "No."

I glowered at him. "Why not?"

"Because you're going to have to talk to her, Ky."

"I can't fucking talk to her!" I motioned toward her room. "I don't want anything to do with her, I don't even want to be near her!"

He gave me a deadpan glare. "She. Didn't. Do. This."

I ground my teeth together so hard that my jaw ached.

"She didn't annul your marriage, she didn't sign the contract, and she sure as fuck didn't buy herself for you." He held up a hand when I opened my mouth to object. "I understand that you're angry. I get it, ok? You have every right to be angry. But, she's innocent in this, Ky, you can't treat her like she's not."

"So, you want me to-" I swallowed as a wave of nausea hit. "Talk to her."

"I'm not asking you to braid her fucking hair, Ky." He sighed. "I'm telling you that you can't take this out on her. You're not that guy. Don't be that guy."

After a shower and changing into a fresh suit, I reluctantly went to her room and knocked on the door.

She didn't answer, but when I turned to leave, Ap'lek was behind me, his arms crossed over his chest.

I muttered a curse under my breath and knocked again. "It's Ky-"

"I know who it is." She snapped from behind the door.

Ap'lek leaned on the wall in front of me, and gave me an encouraging nod.

"I'm sorry for….last night." I said, and sighed when silence was the only answer she offered me.

The lock clicked, and she pulled the door open, her russet brown eyes meeting mine through the crack. I was again struck by a title wave of grief and guilt, the pain threatening to drown me with its current. I looked down, having to force myself to breathe. "I am married to someone else." I told her. "To someone that I want to be married to. My wife was taken, and she was sold, and now she's gone." My throat tightened. "And, I'm not ok. But, I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

She considered me for a moment, then pushed the door open further.

"I can't be a husband to you." I said. "In any way."

If I was being honest, I probably couldn't even be her friend.

'Don't tell her that.' Ap'lek scolded, and I gave him a sideways glare.

"You won't be visiting my bed chamber?" She asked.

I shook my head. "And, you won't be visiting mine."

"What am I to tell the Officials, or my parents when I don't conceive?"

"The fucking truth." I suggested.

She thought for a moment. "And, while I'm here, I'm expected to-"

"You're not expected to do anything." I cut in. "At all. You're not even expected to stay here." In fact, if she could go the fuck home-

'Don't tell her that, either.' Ap'lek sent into my head.

She held up her pointer finger. "Let me make sure I understand." She requested. "The officials knew that you wanted to be married to your first wife, yet they sold her and forced you into the contract with me."

I nodded in confirmation. "Yes."

"And, we won't be doing…" She blushed. "Married things?"

"Absolutely not."

She visibly relaxed. "Do you want me to do anything?" She asked. "Or, not do anything?"

I legitimately didn't care what she did.

'Don't' Ap'lek warned.

"No." I said, instead.

She thought for another moment, then nodded. "Alright." Her russet eyes came to meet mine. "Thank you for apologizing."

I only offered a quick nod, before walking down the hall, but I stopped, and turned back to her. "Wait, what's your name?"

"Beautryze P'Meluh January Poem Rigden-Roderick." She answered immediately.

I raised an eyebrow. "Which one do you go by?"

She giggled, smiling as if she knew exactly how ridiculous her name was, and she had no choice but to have a sense of humor about it. "You can call me Beau."