It is only through labor and painful effort, by grim energy and resolute couragevthat we move on to better things.
Theodore Roosevelt
JENNIE
Lisa's gone when I wake up the next morning, but there's a single black rose on the bedside table, accompanied by a note. My fingers brush lightly against the black rose, amazed by the deep ebony color. I've never seen a black rose before now, and it's beautiful.
It's sitting in a clear vase filled with a black liquid, probably water mixed with black dye to turn the white rose black. I pull the note out from beneath the vase gently, being careful not to tear it. It's typed on a fancy black cardstock, and the text is in a pretty, bold white font that stands out against the black.
Looking forward to seeing you tonight.
I smile brightly. The note is unsigned, but it's safe to assume that it's from Lisa. I mean, we see each other every night, but tonight, we'll both be dressed to impress at a Black Enterprises event. She may be looking forward to seeing me, but I'm also looking forward to seeing her, too. I've already caught a peek at the tux she set aside for tonight, and my mouth waters at the thought of her in it.
Before I move to get ready, I set the black rose carefully down in the vase. A few drops of the black water hits the table, and when I go to wipe it off with my finger, the dye smudges onto my hands. I glance down at my palms, staring at the inky blackness.
It looks ominous against my pale skin.
Lisa sends me a concerned glance when she hears my feet tapping anxiously against the ballroom floor.
Tap.
Tap.
Tap.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
I'm helpless to stop it. The nerves have invaded my body, and I'm no longer in control of my actions.
"It'll be okay," Lisa whispers gently into my ear.
I nod and pull myself together, because I have to.
Lisa and I are at Il Nero, one of her newest hotels in New York, where a Black Enterprises employee event is being held. According to her, Black Enterprises holds these shindigs four times a year to celebrate the end of each quarter. Normally, I'd have nerves, sure, but this isn't normal.
My stomach is churning like it's been hit by an F5 tornado, and I feel like I'm about to vomit. On one hand, the entire board and CEO of IllumaGen are here, and Lisa is about to introduce me to them. On the other hand, this is the last day of the business quarter. That means that Lisa's vote before the Black Enterprises board is set for a week from now, and this is the last day we have to impress them.
And I just happened to stick my nose so far into Suho and Irene's business last time I saw them, I can still smell the stench. I hope Irene made good on her word and talked to Suho on behalf of Lisa. I guess I'll find out soon enough, because they're both standing with the men from IllumaGen.
Oh, and what's up with that?
Why do all these companies only put men in positions of power?
Fuck that.
When she sees me, Irene's eyes light up, and I'm immediately relieved. I allow some of my stress to escape, glad that at least one of my concerns is partially eased.
"Jennie!" Irene hobbles over to me, her heavily pregnant belly preventing her from moving any faster. "I'm so glad you're here!"
My arms wrap around her waist in an awkward embrace given the growing thing in her. "So you don't hate me?"
She rolls her eyes and says, "How can I hate you when we've been having sex, like, twice a day?! Seriously. I thank you. Suho thanks you. My vagina thanks you."
I curtsy dramatically in my evening gown, causing the high slit to expose even more skin. Irene shakes her head in mocking disapproval when Lisa eyes the visible flesh, sending a jolt of lust soaring through my blood.
It's only been a few days since my dinner date with Lisa and about a week and a half since I walked in on Lisa showering, but I can still remember how long and thick she was in the palm of her hands, how great it felt to come undone before her. For the sake of taking things slowly, we've been skirting around what happened, and I'm glad for it… because if she ever brings it up, I won't be able to hold myself back.
"You two are like a bunch of horny teenagers." Irene tuts at us and shakes her head, though her lips are turned up in a smile.
I hip check her. "Says the woman with a vagina that thanks me."
We're laughing when Suho approaches us, a relaxed smile on his face. He looks a lot friendlier than the last time we met, so maybe he actually isn't mad at me. "You look lovely, Jennie." He kisses my cheek then shakes Lisa's hands. "Lalisa."
The four of us head toward the IllumaGen board, where I'm introduced to the C-level officers of the company and a few key shareholders. After the introductions are done, they immediately cut back to their conversation. I frown as they only work to engage Suho and Lisa into the discussion, leaving Irene and I to stand there as mere accessories.
"I propose cutting the research lab in transposable elements. It's a drain on our resources with little to no gain," says the CEO.
He's met with nods from the rest of his board.
Lisa turns to me. "What do you think, Jennie?"
My eyes widen, alarmed by the sudden attention on me. I feel like the kid that's been called on in class because she's not paying attention. But when I look at Lisa, I see that she's genuinely curious. She wants my opinion on this.
"I-I think it would be foolish to cut off TE research."
Well, from a limited business standpoint, I suppose I understand why the CEO would suggest this without truly understanding TEs. TE research is still rudimentary, having only been discovered in the 80s. But once more discoveries are made, the possibilities are endless.
I continue, "Hemophilia A and B, predisposition to cancer, severe combined immunodeficiency, and porphyria are just some of the diseases TEs are known to cause. Research in TEs will be vital to curing these diseases."
When I look at the IllumaGen board, I realize that I'm not convincing them. They make money off of temporary cures, drugs that need to be used over and over again. I need to speak to IllumaGen's biggest moneymaker—antibiotics.
Holding back a grimace, I say, "Already, we know that transposons in bacteria often carry a gene for antibiotic resistance. Imagine if we can figure out a way to prevent these transposons from transposing."
"Antibiotics would be able to be used more often, resulting in an increase in sales for us," the COO finishes for me.
I hate that these men see groundbreaking, potentially lifesaving research as an avenue for profit, but if it means the research will continue, I can't complain. Science saves lives, but there's no science without money. It's irritating, but there's a reason grant writing is a job.
The CEO studies me for a moment, an odd look on his face, before he says, "So, we'll have to make budget cuts elsewhere."
"Not necessarily," I say, earning his interest. "From what I'm hearing, you treat each field of research as a separate division, but if you treat them as interdisciplinary"—I think of Dr. Dennis Slamon, who developed the breast cancer drug Herceptin on the back of birth control research— "you'll be able to cut out a lot of iterative work. Less work, less chemicals, and less time equals—"
"Money saved," interrupts the CFO.
I nod. "Exactly."
When the conversation continues, Irene leans into my ear and whispers, "That was amazing!" At my furrowed brows, she explains, "These guys are misogynistic assholes. They've never once talked to me other than to say hi. It's like my opinion doesn't matter, never mind the fact that I graduated Summa Cum Laude at Wharton while their CFO only graduated Cum Laude."
I squeeze her hand sympathetically and nod, taking the opportunity to lean into Lisa's side.
Lisa is surrounded by these type of men through work, yet she's always been respectful to me. She asked for my opinion, and she's always valued what I have to say.
How am I just realizing how amazing Lisa is? Or have I just been in denial?