Chapter XXII – A Loose End

Aeyrin shifted on her feet in front of Breezehome nervously.

She sent a letter to Lydia previously, promising to come and talk to her whenever she made her way back to Whiterun.

Now it suddenly didn't feel like such a great idea.

But she had to push through her anger and trepidations. If she ever wanted things to go back to the way they were, she had to start somewhere. And it was a good incentive to leave the streets of Whiterun already. She could feel people staring at her, whispering about her. It was an incessant uncomfortable feeling. She needed to get away from it quickly.

With a heavy sigh, she reached for the handle and opened the door.

Oh… perhaps she should have knocked. The unannounced visits never went well at Breezehome for some reason, who knew what she could have walked in on? But it was too late for that now.

Much to her surprise, however, she was only faced with one sight when she entered – Saadia sitting by the large table alone with her balled fist supporting her head. She looked bored out of her skull.

"Oh! Aeyrin? You… came." The Redguard perked up instantly with palpable surprise in her eyes.

"Yes… I… I did," Aeyrin nodded. She slumped her pack onto the floor and approached Saadia tentatively before she sat herself down by the table beside her. "I'm sorry I was so… well… I'm sorry for last time. You were right."

"Of course I was," Saadia scoffed, but it was not malicious. Her face bore a gentle and somewhat relieved expression.

"Is Lydia here?" Aeyrin looked up at her. She kind of hoped that Lydia wasn't here, but she knew that it would be better to deal with this now. There was no sense in delaying what needed to be done. She needed to make things right between them again. She needed to have a place here again where she could return and hide away if she needed to. And she wanted her friend back.

"Not right now. She got a word from the barracks that they had some news for her. I… I have no idea what it could be about," Saadia sighed.

That was odd. Aeyrin thought that Lydia had no obligation to the guard ever since she became a full-fledged housecarl. What could they possibly want from her? An unpleasant feeling washed over her as a thought crept into her mind. What if somehow they knew about the murder of that bandit girl? What if they knew that Lydia was involved?

She knew that she shouldn't voice this worry in front of Saadia – there was no need to make her panic too. But she couldn't help herself.

"Do you… do you think it has something to do with… you know?"

"Satakal's word, don't even think that! No. It can't be. Lydia assured me that it all went… smoothly. And if they found something, they would have found it earlier," Saadia shook her head vehemently. She looked like she said that as much to calm down herself as well as to calm Aeyrin down. And she definitely looked like this thought had occurred to her before as well.

Before Aeyrin could respond, the front door swung open and then shut closed again swiftly with force. Lydia leaned on it with a panicked look in her eyes and started talking before she even looked around the room.

"Saadia, we have a problem, the… oh… Aeyrin." Lydia's face turned into shock within a second.

Aeyrin merely waved at her awkwardly in response, but whatever was happening seemed to erase any prior worries about their encounter now. She gave Lydia a pointed questioning look, waiting for her to continue.

"No matter. It's… it's good that you're here. There's a problem," Lydia sighed and approached them to join them at the table with a forlorn expression on her face. "My friend in the guard, a jailor, Delmonley, he called for me. Apparently the Alik'r I questioned is being released."

Saadia let out a horrified gasp, but the situation only served to confuse Aeyrin further. Saadia had told her previously about the Alik'r warriors that were after her, but she thought that they had all been killed by Lydia and Bishop.

"Wait, what? I thought you got rid of the Alik'r," Aeyrin interrupted Lydia promptly.

"Not all of them. I had to pry their location from the one that was already captured here in the city. We had… an agreement of sorts. I thought that with the rest of them dead, he would just rot away in prison, but… Delmonley said that an order came in to release him today," Lydia explained with a somber look on her face.

"'Released'? That's impossible. Why? On what grounds? He wasn't supposed to be released. You said that Delmonley had it covered," Saadia desperately pried for more information.

"It was… on a Thalmor order," Lydia gave her a defeated look which elicited shock gasps from both the women by the table.

"What? And this Alik'r man knows about Saadia?" Aeyrin frowned.

"No. But he knows me," Lydia bit her lip nervously. "Not by name, but… he could describe me to them and they could simply have their spies talk to the people around the city and… I don't associate with most of the locals, but people know me. And they know… about me and Saadia." It would be instantly obvious that it was Saadia whom she was protecting by questioning the Alik'r man.

"We have to do something!" Saadia yelped in palpable panic. It was no wonder. If the Thalmor learned of her whereabouts, she would certainly be captured by them in no time.

"Is… is there a way to null the order? Maybe if I talked to the Jarl," Aeyrin suggested.

"After what happened last time?" Lydia gave her a doubtful look. "Besides, the Jarl has no right to void Thalmor orders. For that, he would have to officially proclaim his intention to descend from the Empire and he would never risk doing that."

Gods, she was right, wasn't she? Balgruuf was too careful about his while neutrality business to ever risk going against the Thalmor. But… if the Thalmor knew about the Alik'r, why even release him? Could they not simply question the man like Lydia already did?

"Are the Thalmor here?" Aeyrin scowled. If they were, there was no way in which they could stop this now. They would need to smuggle Saadia out of the city instantly.

"No. That's the only good news, I guess. I don't really understand the politics of this, but Delmonley said that they only sent the order by a courier. Apparently, since the city is kind of neutral, the Empire does not want the Thalmor to operate in Whiterun Hold at all until they secure an official alliance. They fear that it would push Balgruuf to join Stormcloaks if his citizens started to complain about Thalmor harassing them about Talos worship and such," Lydia explained.

"So… the Alik'r actually has to leave the Hold to get to the Thalmor?" Saadia looked at her hopefully. She seemed to have been holding her breath the entire time.

"Yes," Lydia nodded. There was a long, heavy silence for a while before she uttered her next words: "We have to kill him."

"What?! Lydia!" Aeyrin gasped incredulously.

"What other choice is there, Aeyrin? We cannot let the Thalmor get Saadia!" Lydia buried her head in her hands desperately.

"But… there must be another way! We can't just murder him! Maybe we can convince him not to talk!" Aeyrin tried to convince her, but it only earned a derisive scoff from Saadia.

"'Convince him not to talk'? Do you have any idea what the Thalmor will do to him to make him talk?" the Redguard shook her head in disgust.

"But… why would he even go to them voluntarily then? I doubt that they will let him live after his blunder," Aeyrin again tried to stray them from this plan. It was insane. And a lot of this still didn't make sense to her.

"Again, do you have any idea what they will do to him once they track him down? Telling them what he knows and earning a quick death is the best option for him," Saadia narrowed her eyes.

Well… that was… bleak.

"Besides, he will be escorted from the Hold by guards. It's part of the order. He is to be delivered to the border straight into Thalmor hands," Lydia shook her head.

Gods, there really didn't seem to be a way out of this. Aeyrin shivered just at the thought of what would happen to Saadia if she were to be captured by the Thalmor. This was… disturbing. And she suddenly realized the scope of her unfair attitude towards Lydia. Sometimes… it seemed like there really wasn't any other choice when one needed to protect those they cared about.

That Alik'r man was a mercenary hired to drag an innocent woman to a dreadful fate, right? They hired a monster like Thorn to actually capture her and deliver her to the Thalmor… and from what Saadia had implied previously, they would not be all too concerned over the state in which Saadia was brought to them. She would have suffered worse than Aeyrin did under Thorn and then she would have suffered even more under the Thalmor's treatment.

What else was there to do? That man was capable of doing this to Saadia, knowing full well what would happen to her. And he was marching to his certain death anyway. Maybe… maybe a quick death would even spare him some torture.

Aeyrin felt sick to her stomach as she justified this in her mind, but… she didn't see any other way either.

"What about the guards? We can't just kill them too," she said desperately. There had to be a line somewhere. It was one thing to kill in the heat of battle, bandits and people who had no qualms about attacking first. But this felt different.

"No… we can't. None of this is their fault," Lydia sighed.

"If only we had a skilled assassin at hand. Someone who's done this before," Saadia noted almost matter-of-factly, giving them both a meaningful look. Did she seriously mean Bishop?!

"Don't call him an 'assassin'!" Aeyrin scoffed at her. Just hearing that made her stomach churl unpleasantly.

Besides, who knew where he was now? The Alik'r was to be released today. And she didn't want to do this to him. She didn't want him to have this on his conscience too. He likely wouldn't mind killing this particular man, but… it still seemed cruel to ask him to do something like this after he had surely been given orders like these from Thorn and Mercer before. She did not want to treat him like they did in any way.

But… perhaps asking for help with this wasn't the worst idea. It was a man marching to his death after all. It was almost a merciful thing to do, wasn't it? It could be quick, virtually painless and most of all, subtle.

"I… I may know about someone… who could help," Aeyrin sighed forlornly.

Both Saadia and Lydia perked up with a hopeful glimmer in their eyes. It was quite disturbing to see such enthusiasm at a planned assassination.

"He could be released any minute. Where is this person?" Lydia asked.

"Close. I hope," Aeyrin nodded before she rose from her seat. Lydia was right – this had to be handled fast. She had already determined that there was no other way. She couldn't allow herself time to back out now.

"I'm coming with you," Lydia stood up abruptly and gave Aeyrin a reassuring nod. "I… I need to make sure," she gave her a surprisingly pleading look. She didn't even know where Aeyrin was going, but this whole situation had obviously rattled her. She must have really cared for Saadia deeply.

"I'm coming too," Saadia rose from the bench as well, but in contrast, was instantly met with a stern stare from Lydia.

"You are going nowhere! We cannot risk anyone seeing you. Not outside of the city and not with us!"

Saadia sat back down heavily. It was clear that she knew that Lydia was right, but that didn't erase the dejected expression on her face. Lydia's own face softened at that and she gently put her hand on Saadia's shoulder. "You will be fine. Everything will be taken care of, I promise," she smiled at her reassuringly and bent down to place a gentle kiss on Saadia's lips.

Despite the situation, Aeyrin couldn't help but grin at them joyfully. Apparently Lydia took her and Bishop's advice and made her intentions towards Saadia clear. It was heartwarming that their relationship blossomed. Hopefully they would be able to stop it from ending in tragedy.

Both women cleared their throats uncomfortably when they noticed Aeyrin staring at them.

Without a word, Lydia quickly rushed up the stairs to get her equipment while Aeyrin moved back towards the door to retrieve her pack.

Hopefully the much needed help would be there to assist.

She could not imagine either her or Lydia actually pulling off a covert assassination.

…

Lydia paced in front of the large building, waiting for Aeyrin to finally emerge with their 'help'.

They have been silent throughout the journey across the city outskirts – she had no inclination to talk just then, as much as she wanted to reconnect with Aeyrin again. She had too much on her mind with what was going on.

She really hoped that Aeyrin's contact would be reliable. Saadia's life was in danger. Just the thought of what the Thalmor would do to her made Lydia boil with rage. She would kill all of them if she could, just to keep her safe. The Thalmor were a menace anyway.

All this gave her a new appreciation towards Bishop's actions with the bandit girl.

She understood now. Completely. There was no other avenue than to act and to do what was necessary. Especially when someone he loved was in such danger. When someone she loved was in such danger.

She looked up at the building again with nervous anticipation.

Why a meadery? Whoever could be in a meadery that could help with this? She really hoped that it wasn't some unreliable drunk. But… Aeyrin would hardly risk everything like that.

Lydia was a bit surprised that Aeyrin went along with this plan. But she clearly saw what was at stake. Maybe… maybe now she would understand why Lydia lied to her, why she did what she did. Aeyrin's letter alone suggested that she was rethinking avoiding Lydia. The message made her so hopeful. She only made very few friends in the guard and they were mostly busy with work. She wasn't great around people, she didn't make connections easily. It hurt to lose Aeyrin, just because she had tried to protect her, just because she had believed Bishop.

But now she knew for certain that she did the right thing, even if Aeyrin couldn't see it before.

Hopefully she could see it now.

Lydia kicked a small stone by the road idly with an impatient sigh escaping her lips.

Luckily, just then, Aeyrin finally emerged from the meadery with a stranger at her heels.

It was clearly a man, but he was draped in all black leather armor with a hood drawn over his head. Lydia really hoped that the man wasn't trying to be inconspicuous – he looked exactly like she would imagine an assassin to look.

"Aeyrin! Good. I'm glad you found… someone," Lydia let out a sigh of relief. No matter how the man was dressed, he was surely up to the task. "Uhm… hello. I'm Lydia." She extended her hand towards him nervously.

The man nodded and shook her hand briefly. He didn't really introduce himself, but maybe that was his intention? Perhaps he was a professional assassin. He would likely not want people to know his name.

"This is Raven. I explained the situation to him and he's willing to help," Aeyrin smiled. "He will find the man and… take him out from afar," she pointed towards the bow fastened on the man's back. "He will then disappear, leaving the guards none the wiser. It will have to be done on a good spot, obviously, so he needs to know the trail that the group will be taking and the exact description of the Alik'r prisoner."

Lydia scowled a bit. The man still stood there, still as a statue and not a word left his lips. He let Aeyrin do all the explaining. But that hardly mattered.

"I know these things," Lydia nodded. She knew from the start that the prisoner had to be dealt with. She made sure to ask Delmonley as inconspicuously as she could about the route and the guards who were taking him. She pretended to be curious about where exactly the Thalmor were welcome to reclaim their prisoner, so she asked about their meeting point, how they were going to get there safely and whatever else came to her mind.

The strange man nudged Aeyrin with his elbow suddenly and, after a brief moment of pondering, she added: "Oh! And he needs to know how many guards there will be."

Lydia nodded again, but she narrowed her eyes at the man all the while. He was really adamant about not talking.

"Alright, well…"

The man raised his hand to stop her from saying anything more and he inclined his head towards the meadery.

"Right. Let's go somewhere a bit more private. This might be a longer discussion and it would be better not to rely on us being alone out here for too long," Aeyrin lowered her voice and, with a determined nod, the man started to lead them towards the side of the building.

This was all very strange.

But this was all for Saadia. It was all worth it.

…

"Are you sure he can be trusted?" Lydia asked Aeyrin nervously after Raven had already left to do the deed.

They settled themselves by a cliffside near the road to Riverwood. It was a secluded place where they could lazy about and wait for Raven to return. They had no idea how long he would take.

"Yes. I trust him," Aeyrin smiled at her reassuringly. She went into the meadery praying that either he or Karliah were there. She had no idea how they would have managed to kill the Alik'r otherwise – they needed someone stealthy who could do this from afar and without being seen. Neither her not Lydia were really capable of that. Their archery skills left a lot to be desired and subtlety wasn't really their strong suit either.

Luckily, Raven was at the meadery and he was more than willing to help. It didn't seem to bother him at all that he was asked to assassinate someone like that. Perhaps it was the circumstances that she had explained to him – the man was going to die at the hands of the Thalmor anyway and he was a hired thug. Still, it bothered her to be dealing with things like this. But fortunately, it didn't seem to bother Raven. And… mentioning the whole business with the Alik'r hiring Thorn of all people to capture Saadia probably helped a bit in swaying him too. The look of disgust on his face when Aeyrin had mentioned that name said it all.

"So… how much did he ask for?" Lydia asked nervously. It seemed like she should reimburse Aeyrin for the hit… she was against this at first, it was hardly fair.

"What? I didn't pay him. He's doing me a favor," Aeyrin smiled at her reassuringly once more.

"Oh… a 'favor'? What… what do you have to do in return?" Lydia cringed. That somehow sounded much worse. She didn't even want to imagine what someone could want in exchange for a murder.

"Nothing! Lydia, he's a friend," Aeyrin giggled softly. Granted, the situation was tense, but Lydia made it sound like Aeyrin was hiring the Dark Brotherhood to take some innocent person out. This was no innocent person and it was no assassination contract. She had to remind herself of that.

"Oh… I never really thought about assassins having friends," Lydia pondered for a while. To be fair, she never really thought about the day-to-day life of an assassin at all.

"He's not an assassin!" Aeyrin shook her head vehemently. Lydia and Saadia sure did like to throw that word around. "He's… he was in the Guild. The Thieves Guild, with Bishop. He's stealthy and good with a bow. And he knows how to hide from the law, that's it."

"Oh! Oh, that's a relief… for some reason," Lydia let out a sigh before her brows creased deeply yet again. "The… same 'Guild' that has that bounty on you?"

"Well… yeah, but he's not with them anymore, he's… he…" Aeyrin racked her brain on how to explain as briefly as possible, but Lydia interrupted her with unexplainable excitement, as if she had just figured out a difficult puzzle.

"Oh! He's with that woman and the people who want to take down the Guild, right? The ones that… that killed the bandits in Falkreath?"

Aeyrin almost forgot that Bishop had already revealed much of what happened to Lydia. She wasn't sure if she was relieved that she didn't have to explain, or uncomfortable with just how much Lydia knew.

"Yes," she only nodded without further elaboration.

"Why doesn't he speak? I thought that it was some creepy assassin thing," Lydia pondered.

"No… the Guildmaster had his tongue cut out… because he told me secrets," Aeyrin sighed. Another casualty in hers and Bishop's conflict with Mercer. Bishop claimed that it would have happened to Raven sooner or later anyway, but that somehow didn't make it any better.

"Oh… that's… awful," Lydia scowled regretfully. She didn't want to talk about that Raven person anymore though. There were other things on her mind, besides the obvious worry for Saadia's safety, but she had no idea how to broach the subject. She had to try though. Aeyrin certainly didn't seem eager to bring it up herself. "It… it kind of makes you think, huh? About… about what some people are capable of… that… sometimes some measures need to be taken to stop them."

"Subtle," Aeyrin scoffed at her, but despite Lydia's pathetically transparent attempt to broach that sensitive topic, she smiled weakly. "And believe me, the irony of this situation did not escape me," she snorted derisively, mostly at herself. She was now doing pretty much the same thing that Bishop and Lydia had done to protect her. Except for one thing… she wasn't keeping this from Saadia.

"Aeyrin, I… I am really sorry for lying to you," Lydia turned to her as they sat next to each other in the empty clearing. Her eyes were palpably pleading. "I didn't want to! I didn't want to do any of it, but… I believed him. And… I don't want it to sound like I'm blaming him. No. I did do the right thing. Just like I'm doing now. And so did he. We both did the best we could in the midst of this mess."

"I know," Aeyrin only nodded. She kept her eyes on the horizon visible behind a foliage of trees that hid them from view. "I was angry at you for lying. I was angry at everyone for lying and deceiving me. But I know that your back was to the wall. I just… I couldn't talk to you. I know that it was selfish and that I hurt you, but… it was too much." Tears sprang into her eyes involuntarily and she quickly blinked them away. For some reason, just saying that sentence was like something was bubbling up inside her.

"Aeyrin, please, don't apologize. I… understand. Not that I could… understand, I just… I didn't mean for Saadia to accost you like that. She was just worried about me. I told her to leave you alone. I mean… you must have gone through something awful…"

Aeyrin felt something strange overcome her. Lydia's voice bore an unprecedented amount of emotion and it somehow made her unable to stop herself from talking, as much as she might have wanted to stop. She didn't want to discuss this at all, did she?

"It's not like… it's not like I've never been hurt before. Or captured, or… humiliated and made powerless. I've never been tortured like that before, so… that was new," she scoffed at herself with obvious disgust in her voice. "I know I got off easy. I saw… a corpse there, in that place… I barely recognized that it was ever a person. And… I was sure that I would end up like that," a tear slipped from her eye at her own words and she quickly wiped it away.

She wasn't sure why she said that part. It wasn't the point that she was trying to make. She nervously brushed her hair behind her ear but stopped herself abruptly when she felt the flat tip. She could feel Lydia's constant stare on her, as if she was watching a deer and worried about frightening it away.

"It wasn't just that. But… it was… all of it, with the lies and everyone conspiring behind my back… and… and how… how stupid I was for getting captured like that. I… I'm not saying it was my own fault… I'm just saying… it was all of it. I didn't want to hurt anyone, but I couldn't talk to anyone. I can't take the questions, the looks of pity. It's just… I don't want to talk about it, Lydia," she shook her head, but the words stung her bitterly as she realized that it was exactly what she was doing.

Bishop was wrong – it didn't make her feel better.

"Aeyrin, you could have told me. I wouldn't have made you talk about anything you didn't want to," Lydia gave her a concerned look. She looked like she wanted to reach out to touch her shoulder comfortingly but her hand jerked back in an instant. Aeyrin really felt like some elusive prey just then. She didn't like how careful Lydia was around her. This was exactly what she meant.

"I was angry! You lied to me and everyone else lied to me too! I didn't want to think about your side of things. I didn't even want to think about anything related to what happened," Aeyrin scowled. Actually, she still didn't, but it was kind of late to back out now. Her mouth somehow worked without her own volition, it seemed. She certainly didn't want to share half of the things she already had.

"That's fair. I understand that," Lydia sighed somberly. "And yet… you're here. We barely even said a word to each other and you were willing to help me," she smiled fondly with a grateful expression on her face.

"You think I could just walk away with Saadia in this mess?" Aeyrin finally turned her eyes to her. Her expression was almost accusing.

"I think that it would be understandable. There's nothing wrong about being selfish after what… what happened," Lydia gave her a sad look, but she quickly averted her eyes, as if she had just remembered Aeyrin's words about 'looks of pity'. It hardly helped – her words were already charged with the things that Aeyrin hated the most. She would really prefer if her crappy behavior wasn't being excused by a bad experience. Maybe then it wouldn't need to have such weight.

Besides, calling it 'selfish' seemed like an understatement when Saadia was faced with a very cruel death at the least.

"I don't want to be that person," Aeyrin answered curtly.

"Well… you're not. You're here," Lydia gave her a genuine smile.

Luckily, that seemed to put an end to the discussion.

Aeyrin wasn't sure what came over her, but she certainly didn't mean to get into this particular topic that much. It wasn't helpful in any way.

Hopefully Lydia's trepidation would at least steer her away from returning to it.

…

They have spent another two hours in the clearing, idling silently or talking.

Luckily, the topics mostly concentrated on more pleasant things after the initial discussions.

Lydia was questioned substantially on her relationship with Saadia, and after endless prodding, she admitted that things were going well, that Saadia was often staying at Breezehome with her and that she believed that she was in love. She only admitted that with constant uncomfortable coughs and blushes and she instantly asked Aeyrin not to tell a soul, including Saadia, but she did admit it.

Lydia steered away from a lot of topics during their discussion. Including Bishop. Aeyrin wasn't even sure what she knew now. Bishop was certainly surprisingly open with Lydia, but she had no idea how often they were actually in contact. And it wasn't as if she minded being spared agonizing over their relationship for one day. Things seemed good the way they were now.

In general, the conversation seemed to cover anything, just so it would make them too distracted to think about their current predicament.

But soon enough, a rustle of leaves disturbed their lazing about and a figure in dark leather armor appeared in the clearing.

Aeyrin sprung up on her feet and gave Raven a questioning look instantly.

His only answer was a brief smile and an affirmative nod.

"Oh, thank the Eight," Aeyrin let out a relieved sigh and, without a second thought, she threw her arms around Raven's neck and pulled him into an embrace. It was hardly an unusual gesture between them by now. "Thank you so much, Raven," she squeezed him to herself, but somehow, this time, the moment turned… strange.

Raven's arms wrapped around her waist, as usual, but he seemed to hold her with a strange intensity. His head lowered so that he buried his face in her hair and… it sounded like he inhaled really exaggeratedly. His grip on her tightened even more then and one of his hands lowered a bit, not too low, but enough to grip firmly at her hip.

Aeyrin quickly pushed herself away from him.

Gods, why would he do that?

It felt so strangely intimate just then. Maybe she shouldn't have hugged him after what happened between them when they shared his bed. But she really hoped that they would both just forget about that and pretend that nothing was different. Besides, even if he didn't want to forget about it, Lydia was right there. Did he really have to do this in front of her?

Aeyrin's face turned deep crimson and she stammered her next words awkwardly: "I-I-I… I hope you… I hope everything is… alright. No one saw you?" She tried to voice that question as quickly as possible, just to move on from that embarrassing exchange.

Raven shook his head with a gentle smile, but soon enough his brows creased in worry and he gave her a searching glance. As if it was so inconceivable for her to get uncomfortable at his intimate hug.

"G-good. Thank you again, really. I… I'll be waiting for your message," she gave him a weak encouraging smile.

Please, go away. Please, go away. Please, go away.

Raven nodded at her and gently reached for her arm to squeeze her bicep for a brief second. Then he inclined his head towards Lydia and gave her a brief acknowledging nod before he turned on his heel and disappeared into the thicket.

Thank the Divines!

There was a moment of awkward silence when Raven left. Aeyrin could hear Lydia's armor clank as she got up from her position, but nothing more. Why was the atmosphere so tense suddenly?

"S-so… you and that man…?" Lydia asked carefully after a while.

Oh Gods! Raven, you idiot.

"No! No… it's nothing like… no. I told you, we're friends," Aeyrin turned to her sharply. She really didn't want to give any importance to whatever had happened between her and Raven. It was a momentary lapse of judgment on her part.

"Never hugged a friend like that," Lydia grumbled almost silently. She seemed oddly… peeved, for some reason. She stared into the ground with a strange pouty expression and her brows creased as in deep conflict.

Aeyrin stared at her in confusion, but it didn't take long before Lydia took a deep determined breath and looked up at Aeyrin, straight into her eyes.

"I know, alright? I know that Bishop lied to you and that he kept things from you, but… look, you said yourself that you understood why we… he… why things turned out like this. I know that it's probably hard to get over, it's just," she stammered. It was apparent now that she was angry about Aeyrin's perceived relationship with someone other than Bishop. Her loyalty was somewhat impressive… and unexpected. Although it did seem like she didn't actually know how to make Bishop's case.

"Lydia, stop. It's not…"

Before Aeyrin managed to calm her down, Lydia interrupted her, talking uncharacteristically quickly: "It's just that I've talked to him and… you know, I've never seen him that… devastated. Aeyrin, please at least talk to him. Or… or at least send him a letter or something. I mean, I've seen that man drag a damn corpse into a house without as much as a flinch and he just… seemed to barely hold together when I last saw him."

Divines, that was so hard to hear.

Aeyrin couldn't listen to this anymore.

"Lydia, stop! I did, alright? I contacted him, I talked to him, and I'm sure I'll see him again soon. We're fine," she raised her hands in mock-surrender as if she was trying to calm down an enraged animal. Mostly she just wanted Lydia to stop talking about this.

"Oh… so… you're back together?" Lydia looked at her curiously. She seemed oddly hopeful. Aeyrin wasn't sure if she was that worried about Bishop, or if she just desperately wanted things to go back to the way they were before all this happened. She could certainly understand that particular wish.

"N-n… uhhh… I… it's complicated?" Aeyrin gave her an uncertain shrug. She really didn't want to get into this. "We're… working on things. And I'm not with Raven," she shook her head vehemently. She really hoped that the reassurance would deter Lydia from ever telling Bishop about the odd moment she had just witnessed. Things were tense enough as it was between him and Raven. Although it did sound like Lydia and Bishop weren't exactly in contact recently. She didn't even know that Aeyrin had responded to his letters, let alone seen him.

"Oh… alright," Lydia nodded. She suddenly seemed all too self-aware of her strange outburst and she shuffled her feet nervously. "So… are you staying at Breezehome or at Jorrvaskr?" she asked after a while, eager to change the subject.

Aeyrin pondered the question for a while.

Today was oddly exhausting. And she wasn't exactly eager to deal with more problems. Whatever was going on with the Companions, it sounded like the exact type of thing that she didn't want to get into after all of this. She just wanted to do nothing for a while, just to find some place to shut herself off from the rest of the world and…

Huh… that actually sounded too tempting.

Was it too soon to contact Bishop? It's been barely two days.

But… she needed to hide herself in his arms. That was the point, wasn't it?

She should write to him right away. But in the meantime, Breezehome sounded like the most drama-free option.

"I'll stay at Breezehome for today," Aeyrin nodded at Lydia with a smile. She would leave the next day and just go somewhere adventuring before Bishop could join her. He couldn't do that in Whiterun anyway. "Oh… unless… you need some… privacy?" she couldn't help but giggle as Lydia's face reddened.

She deserved it. She'd made her embarrassed like this constantly before.

"No! No… I mean… we don't… well… we do… but… if you're not comfortable with that… in your house…" Lydia started to stammer instantly. It was to be expected when dealing with this subject with her. Aeyrin could understand that. She should really end her agony.

"Relax. Your house, remember?" she snickered at Lydia. "But wouldn't you need a bigger bed now? I mean, that thing is so small. I can put in the funds, you know?" She couldn't help but tease her more, at least a little. It was so oddly satisfying.

"We're fine," Lydia sighed exasperatedly. "You and Bishop, really! He already offered, you know? Though I suspect that he was more interested in mocking me rather than being actually concerned about my comfort."

That did sound like Bishop.

Aeyrin chuckled again before she inclined her head towards the road. With the loose end tied, they should really go tell Saadia the good news. She must have been worried out of her mind.

And Aeyrin was pretty sure that there would be some of Lydia's delicious food in the house.

Oh how she missed that.