Now that the match with the girls is done, let's see how someone else is feeling. There's another girl who might be feeling more than a little anxious about the current state of affairs.

The Finals have begun! The Pokemon Academy Best Girl Finals is heating up, I can't wait to see how it goes. The race is really close, and it's still anyone's game, showing just how great these girls really are. Any one of them deserves the title of Pokemon Academy Best Girl, but only one of them will be able to win! If you haven't voted for your best girl yet, better get those votes in quick! This contest is gonna be a close one it looks like, a single vote makes all the difference! Who will be the Pokemon Academy Best Girl?

Finalists: Sango, Ayame, Marion

Hellraiserphoenix: Next battle will probably be with Elaina and Blake.

KedharS: Well, we'll be catching up on someone else here.

Aquahaze675: That's exactly why, harmonia + return (and STAB) is powerful.

Pokemon Academy: Beginning of Beginnings

Chapter 313

"I'm sorry."

Ayame felt like her world was coming down around her. No, this just… this couldn't be real.

"What… Blake, what are you trying to say?" Ayame asked. Her voice sounded hollow and distant, like she was listening to an empty recording of herself, rather than hearing the words coming out of her own mouth.

"I know this isn't fair to you," Blake said. She could see the pain on his face, and seeing him suffer eclipsed the pain she was feeling herself. "You can hate me if you want. Maybe that will make it easier somehow…"

No, don't say that! Ayame wanted to scream, but the words wouldn't come out. Don't tell me I can hate you! I can't hate you, I'll never hate you! I love you, Blake!

"And maybe having this happen so fast, so soon, after we got together…" Blake shook his head. He couldn't even look her in the eye. "But I think…"

Not again. Don't say it again. Please don't say it again, tell me you're kidding, tell me you're lying, tell me this is some cruel, sick joke. Most people wouldn't forgive you, but I would. I love you, Blake, so please don't tell me-

"I'm in love with Elaina," Blake said quietly. "We need to break up."

Ayame's heart crumbled to pieces.

"But… don't you love me?" Her voice came out like a small squeak, and suddenly she felt like a weak and helpless child.

"I thought I did. But that night… with what happened… I was confused. My emotions were jumbled… and I told you things I never should have."

No. Don't tell me that was all a lie. Those kisses, those smiles, the way you hugged me, that wasn't a lie! You can't say it was all a lie.

"I'm sorry I did something so cruel." Blake looked like he was going to cry. That hurt in his eyes made it so much worse. He felt so bad for how he hurt her that it made her want to cry even more than she already was.

"But…" she croaked out in a voice that wasn't her own, "but I love you…"

Blake's face was hard when he said two words that she didn't want to hear. Not again.

"I'm sorry."

Ayame awoke in a cold sweat, her face soaked with tears.

"No… don't…" She mumbled, shaking her head, unsure of where she was. It… it wasn't real. She was nearly hyperventilating, and it took her a few minutes to catch her breath and stop panting, the warm sheets around her feeling like a coffin smothering her.

"Just a dream…" she murmured, sitting up in bed and clutched her knees tightly up against her chest, rocking back and forth, numbly repeating to herself "it was just a dream… it was just a dream… it was just a dream…"

Ayame glanced down at the floor, where her precious Blaiwooloo lay discarded on his side, kicked loose in her fever dream. She slid her legs over the edge of her bed and leaned down, picking up the stuffed toy, that was no different than any other stuffed Wooloo, but was one of the most precious things she owned.

"It's not true," Ayame sobbed, hugging the soft fuzzy pokemon plush to her face, wetting it with her tears. "I know that he loves me."

If only she still had the same confidence she did when confronting Claire.

Ayame cried a lot that morning. She cried some more in her bed, she cried in the shower, while brushing her teeth, while getting dressed…

At some point she couldn't cry any longer, and that's when she dragged herself downstairs, half-dead, to begin making a late breakfast.

Ayame was slogging through her eggs, a half-eaten piece of toast on her plate, when Olivia walked into the kitchen to greet her.

"Well, don't you look like death," Olivia said, leaning back from the refrigerator and staring at Ayame's disheveled appearance. "Trouble sleeping?"

Ayame grunted something in response, which gave Olivia pause. She held the door open, letting the cool air blow into the kitchen.

"…Aya, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Ayame muttered, draining the glass of orange juice and slamming it down on the table. "Leave me alone."

Olivia shut the refrigerator door and stormed over to the small table Ayame was eating at, pulling the chair across from her back and sitting down in it. She stared into Ayame's eyes. She could see that the familiar light in those eyes…

It looked so dim.

"I know you better than that, Aya."

Ayame gritted her teeth, telling herself to stop trembling. She hung her head and stared down into her lap, resisting the urge to cry.

"I'm scared…"

Olivia reached across the table and ran her fingers through Ayame's hair. She lowered her hand and cradled Ayame's chin, tilting her head up to face her. Her eyes were red and swollen. She'd clearly been crying for a long time.

"Is it Blake?" Olivia demanded. "What happened? Are you guys having a fight? If he's the one who made you cry then I'll-"

"No, it's not…" Ayame sighed, tears welling up into her eyes again. "It's… it's my fault."

"It can't be," Olivia said, lifting her hand up and wiping the tears from Ayame's eyes. "It could never be your fault, my sweet girl."

"I'm so afraid… Blake, he… right now, he's with the fucking Elaina Bishop, and I…"

Ayame began trembling.

"I'm afraid he's going to leave me…"

She hadn't wanted to say it. Saying it made it real. After all her bluster to Sango and Claire, the truth was she really was the weak girl that she'd denied being. It wasn't that she doubted Blake. She trusted him. She trusted him more than she trusted herself, more than she trusted even Olivia. It wasn't Blake that she had lost faith in. It was herself.

"He wouldn't," Olivia said, shaking her head, but her words of comfort fell upon deaf ears.

"Why the fuck would he fucking want someone like me? He fell for me because… because I was fucking there. Not because… not because I'm someone fucking special! The way he fought for Elaina… the way he cared for her, tried to help her… he never did something like that for me. Because I'm just… I'm not fucking important I guess. Anyone could have fucking done what I did."

Ayame's painful words were like venom seeping into her heart. She was just some girl who'd helped Blake when he was down. Taken advantage of his vulnerable state to… what? Fool him into thinking that he had feelings for her? Who was she kidding? It wasn't like the two of them had a future together. No matter how much she loved him, no matter how much she wanted to be with him…

"I'm just not the right fucking person for him. Even if I love him, even if he loves me for some fucking reason, he should be with someone he can really-"

A loud slap resounded across the room, and Ayame felt her vision swimming. Her head had spun so fast she felt a little dizzy. She shook her head from side to side for a second or two to try and get some clarity. Her cheek stung.

"Oof, didn't expect that to hurt so much," Olivia said, blowing on her hand as she shook it in the air. "You really are thick-headed."

"You… you fucking slapped me!" Ayame gasped incredulously.

"And people call you dense."

"You've NEVER hit me! What the fuck was that?!" Ayame snarled, rising up and pushing her chair back, glaring at her friend.

"Never needed to before," Olivia said. "Now then, since I've slapped some sense into that pretty little head of yours, are you ready to stop being an idiot?"

"I'm not being a-"

Olivia raised her eyebrow and her hand twitched, causing Ayame to flinch in response. Even though Ayame had a good six inches and on the girl sitting across from her, and a sizeable weight difference in muscle on the size-0 model, she was still a little cowed. Olivia seemed to not be in the mood for backtalk right now. Ayame sighed and sat back down, letting Olivia continue talking.

"Aya, Blake loves you, right?"

"Of course he does," Ayame said automatically. "But I mean, he fucking shouldn't, or… he wouldn't, he just… it's because I'm just fucking…"

"Aya, you're beautiful," Olivia crooned, gently cradling the swollen red mark on Ayame's cheek. "Is it so hard to believe that Blake didn't fall in love with you because he was at a low point, or because he felt bad for you, or because you were the one there, and it could have been anyone else? Are you so insecure that you think that Blake couldn't have fallen for you because of the lovely, sweet, charming girl that you are?"

Ayame wanted to believe that was true so badly. Not only would that being true make her feel over the moon, but it would also assuage the guilt she was feeling in doubting the sincerity of her boyfriend's affections for her.

"Listen, I'm not much one for commitment," Olivia admitted, "and being as lovely as I am, such a notion that a girl I was interested in would prefer to be with someone other than myself has not occurred to me even once, so…"

Olivia trailed off on her narcissistic self-lauding.

"…Where was I going with this again?"

Ayame sighed.

"Well, look, there's nothing wrong with feeling a little insecure," Olivia assured Ayame. "But I suppose a little confidence boost wouldn't be out of the question."

Ayame tilted her head to the side.

"Do you know what I told Blake when I caught you two that morning? Our little conversation in private?" Olivia asked. "Well, I'll spare you the more… 'risque' parts, but in short, here's what he told me about his feelings for you. Sure you want to hear them?"

Ayame swallowed. She wasn't sure if she did, but she knew that, as Blake's girlfriend, she had a responsibility to do right by him. And she couldn't be a good girlfriend if she kept harboring these doubts in her chest. Maybe what Olivia said would make her feel better. Maybe it would make her feel worse. But either way, it would help her decide what to say to him when the topic came up. Because she couldn't keep this feeling bottled inside her.

She nodded.

"Blake said to me, and I quote, 'this isn't some whim'," Olivia informed her. "'I just… I finally realized that I'm in love with her, and I want to make her happy!'"

Ayame felt her cheeks flush.

"R-really? But couldn't he-"

"You and I both know that Blake isn't the kind of person who would tell you he loved you if he wasn't sure of it. He didn't fall in love with you because you were there when he needed someone. If you can't believe that, then there's nothing I can say to get you to think otherwise. But then again, that was always the case, wasn't it? Isn't there someone else you could talk to?"

"You mean… Blake?"

"Oh, I'm certain that talking to Blake and hearing from him just how head over heels he is for you would make you feel better, because you're a simple sort of girl like that. He'd say how much he loves you and you're the one for him, and you'd get all red and flustered, and that would be that. But that's not what I'm talking about."

"Then… who?"

"Her," Olivia said, pointing her finger.

Right at Ayame's chest.

Olivia leaned forward and poked Ayame in the breast, right above her heart.

"The only person you can talk to who can make you feel better is right here," Olivia said. "What does Ayame have to say about it?"

"I, I…"

"See, here's what I'm thinking. I'm thinking that you and I know full well that Blake's in love with you. For whatever reason, we both know that those feelings are real. And yet, even though you know that, you still have doubts. Because the Ayame right here is wondering if she deserves it. If she's really worth the love of the boy that she's so smitten with. That sound about right?"

Ayame hung her head and nodded glumly.

Olivia sighed, pulling her hand back, and massaged her temples.

"Aya, I could tell you that you're the sweetest most perfect little tomboy princess and that you're so far out of Blake's league that the thought of you settling for him can only be attested to a miracle, but that wouldn't do any good," Olivia replied. "What does Ayame think? Does Ayame think that she deserves to be loved by the boy she likes? Because I'll tell you right now, if you think that you aren't worthy of the love of someone else, then you aren't. You have to love yourself before someone else can love you, Aya. So tell me. Are you worthy?"

"I am!" Ayame insisted, bringing a smile to Olivia's face.

There's my girl.

"I am worthy of Blake's love!" Ayame insisted. That fire was back now, and Olivia was overjoyed to see it. "But even so, I still feel like… like…"

"I get it, jealousy sucks," Olivia shrugged. "So tell me, Aya, what are you going to do about it? Are you going to stew and wonder if you're good enough? Because that sounds like something that the normally confident you wouldn't do. Where's the Aya who would proclaim that she wouldn't give up on Blake no matter what? That she was in love with him and pursue him with all of her heart? You aren't getting all weak now that he actually said yes, are you? Afraid that you've got something to lose, hmm? Well, if you're gonna give up, then-"

"I'm not giving up!" Ayame exclaimed, standing up again. "Who the fuck said that?! I'm not giving up on my feelings, I just-"

"Like I said, jealous and worried. Like any other teenaged girl with a mountain of troubles sitting on her relationship. Admittedly, you and Blake have more issues than the average couple, but… you're still a couple, aren't you? Don't you both love each other and want to make each other happy?" Olivia asked her.

Ayame sunk back in her seat and nodded.

"Now, I'm no relationship expert, but… isn't that enough?"

"But… I don't know how," Ayame admitted. "I want to be a better girlfriend… but it's not like I'm some pro or something! I'm older than him, so I'm supposed to be the one taking the lead here! But I've never had a boyfriend before!"

"I guarantee you, NO ONE is expecting you to be taking any sort of initiative in this relationship," Olivia replied. "A shy, naïve little virgin like you with a thick skull and the heart of an insecure, pure maiden? Please."

Olivia's words caused serious damage to Ayame.

"Your words hurt… but I can't say you're wrong…" Ayame muttered.

"Well, if you want to be a good girlfriend, there's only one thing you need to do," Olivia told her.

Ayame's eyes widened hopefully.

"Wh-what?!" Ayame asked.

"Simple, Aya," Olivia said, pointing her fingers to the edges of her lips, pushing them up into a smile. "You just have to smile."

"Smile?"

"Aya, to me, your smile is like water in the desert. Food at the end of a long day. It reassures me, fulfills me, gives me nothing short of pure happiness," Olivia replied, holding her hand over her breasts. "I care for you so much, that just seeing you smiling fills me with more joy than anything."

"Er, um…" Ayame's face was bright red, not sure what to say to a confession like that. "I-I like boys, Olivia, er, boss, I mean, so I-"

Olivia rolled her eyes, shaking her head to dismiss Ayame's assumption that she was coming onto her. She reached up and nestled her hand on Ayame's cheek, stroking it gently.

"And if I thought that Blake's feelings for you were anything less than my own, then I never would have let him get anywhere near you," Olivia assured her. "Any boy who just you being there wasn't enough for him has no right laying his hands on my precious Aya."

"But… but that isn't enough for me," Ayame sputtered. "I… I want to do more for him somehow, not just… not just being there and loving him. Like… like right now, Elaina can fight with him, but I'm not a battler, I can't support him like that, I can't… I mean…"

"You want to be a better girlfriend, I get it," Olivia nodded.

"Like… I want to do girlfriend stuff with him," Ayame admitted. "To him, I don't know, not just dates, but, you know…"

Olivia's eyes widened and she lowered her hand, giving a high whistle.

"So by 'girlfriend stuff' you mean-"

"Not!" Ayame exclaimed. "Not… like… that…"

Ayame's face was bright red.

"Like! Like… I want to hold hands with him more! Stay up late watching dumb movies, going on picnics, taking a couples selfie that I can set as my phone background, you know! Girlfriend stuff! Just… I mean, we went on dates before, so it feels… has anything really changed?"

"Well you two kiss a lot more," Olivia sniggered.

"Th… the kissing is nice," Ayame admitted, nodding. "But, like… what am I supposed to do? As a girlfriend? What would a girlfriend do in situation like… this?"

"Well, I've dealt with a few jealous girlfriends in my time, and in my experience they usually would burn the girl's stuff in revenge," Olivia said, recalling a few girls who were rather upset with her advances on their partners. "Let's not do that, 'kay?"

She placed her hand on Ayame's shoulder, rising from her seat. She walked around the table and put both hands on Ayame's shoulders, rubbing them comfortingly.

"You two are going at your own pace, and that's okay. So if you want to be a little more like a good girlfriend, then go for it. Do what makes you happy in your relationship. And if Blake loves you, he'll accept it. If he's not ready, or you're moving too fast for him, then be patient. A relationship is a compromise, Aya. Just like a friendship. That's what I would think, anyway. Is that good enough for you?"

Aya nodded her head.

"I'm not sure what I should do," Aya admitted. "But hopefully I'll come up with a way to be the best girlfriend I can be."

"That's my girl," Olivia purred, moving her hands down and wrapping them around Ayame's waist, nuzzling her chin into the crook of her neck. "You just run straight ahead and give him all the love you've got. I'm sure you can squeeze a lot of it in that tall frame of yours."

Ayame reached up and wiped the tears from her eyes, nodding.

Hopefully, Ayame will get past those doubts. She's a strong girl, so I'm sure she'll be able to realize she can be perfect all on her own.