In this chapter, we get the aftermath of the cataclysmic battle. Things aren't looking well for anyone, what will the fallout entail? And what will Kitty's reaction be, with the benefit of hindsight of all that occurred?

KedharS: The question is, will she learn better for next time?

Rosealine gold: I don't know how long the arc will take to finish, but I'm hoping it'll happen soon! We've gotten through most of the important stuff already!

Thunder Fire: I have no idea what the answer is to either of your questions, those are questions for his creator.

Pokemon Academy: Beginning of Beginnings

Chapter 355

Kitty woke up feeling like she wanted to be sleeping. There was a feeling of nausea in her gut, but it wasn't telling her to throw up. It just made her feel awful. Her headache was killing her even as she was trying to sit up. She blinked wearily, trying to shake the fatigue from her harmonia away, but it wasn't working no matter how hard she tried.

Unfortunately, Kitty had gotten all too used to waking up in the infirmary. She was scarily aware that this was becoming a familiarity. And yet this time felt different. She didn't know why, but it did.

This time she felt miserable.

"Kitty! You're awake!"

Kitty turned her head in the direction of Julia's voice, and just the slightest turn of her head was enough to send another wave of pain rolling over her skull, causing her to wince in pain.

"Ju… Julia?" Kitty whispered. Her voice was hoarse. It was all coming back to her. Her battle against Nick and Will, her harmonia building up higher and higher, until she finally let it all go into a massive release of power that defeated everyone, draining her of her strength and knocking her unconscious. But one thing she remembered was that she had won. No one can dispute that she had won. And that brought a smile to her face.

Kitty scooted back, sitting up in bed even though it made her headache throb even more.

"No, Kitty, you need to lie down," Julia urged her, running to Kitty's side. Kitty glanced over to her. Behind the frantic Julia were Nikita and Reiner, Nikita looking a strange mixture of relieved and scared and even Reiner was looking a little anxious. "You're lucky that you're the only one who got injured. Nick, Will, Nikita, they're all fine, but you, you passed out after the fight. So sit back and take it easy, okay? Now isn't the time for this."

Kitty scowled through the pain, shaking her head.

"I'm fine…" she murmured, even though she didn't feel fine at all. She didn't want Julia to think she was weak or fragile. She was able to keep going, even if she felt miserable. She was stronger, she had managed to win.

"No, you're clearly not fine," Julia snapped. "You look like death! After what you just did, you need some serious rest!"

Kitty scowled. Julia was still looking down on her!

"I am!" Kitty snapped back at her, flinging out her arm and knocking Julia's comforting hand away. "Didn't you just see what I did?"

"Kitty?" Julia stepped back, a little confused. "What… huh?"

"I just won that battle," Kitty explained. "Weren't you watching? Didn't you see?! I was strong! I won that fight, using my harmonia! I'm stronger now, so just stop treating me like I'm a child who can't do anything! I defeated Nick and Will, because I'm strong! I don't need to stay here! I don't need to be cared for and babied like this!"

"That's… Kitty!" Julia sputtered. "How can you say that?! Don't you see what just happened?! You won, sure, but look at you! You put yourself in the hospital! How can you tell me not to worry about you when you do something reckless like that?! Don't you remember what happened to Elaina when she overused her powers? She ended up in a coma! Is that what you want, huh?! Don't you have any idea how worried I was, seeing you pass out like that?! I was… I was so scared… I…"

Kitty was stunned into silence, seeing Julia start to tear up.

"Julia…"

"I was scared that you would never wake up!" Julia sobbed. "That you had just knocked yourself into a coma that you'd never be able to escape, and I'd never be able to see you again, or talk to you, I… I was terrified! So please, don't… don't do that again! Please, stop using that power, Kitty, please!"

Kitty frowned. To hear Julia feeling so strongly for her, it was truly touching. She felt happy that Julia was concerned for her and wanted to spend time with her, but… but she was fine. Julia was concerned, but Kitty… Kitty didn't feel concerned. She felt a little nauseous, sure. Her head hurt, sure. But she hadn't hurt Nick or Will, right? She wasn't like Elaina, she hadn't lost control, not really. She'd released her power to its fullest, and everything had been fine. Because she could control that power of hers. It was a part of her, and as long as Kitty knew that, she would be fine.

"I won't," Kitty replied, her eyes flashing. "I'm strong now, Julia. This power… I was scared of this at first, but now I see that it's everything I wanted. I can connect with my pokemon, really reach them, be happy with them. And I can feel us growing stronger together. You don't need to be concerned for me anymore, Julia. I'm strong now. I might be even stronger than you."

Julia didn't know what to say. She wiped her eyes and opened her mouth to reply to Kitty's words, but the opening of the infirmary door brought something that no one was expecting.

Blake stood in the infirmary door, panting. And right behind him, to the shock and discomfort of everyone else in the room, was Elaina Bishop, her cold white mask staring out at the uncomfortable students.

"Kitty…" Blake stepped into the room, the worry on his face clear. Kitty almost felt bad, seeing him like that. Just like Julia, he was obviously worried about her, given his experience with harmonia. But he didn't need to be worried. If anyone would understand what she was going through right now, it would be Blake.

Elaina stepped into the room and flinched, her body freezing up. She held her hand over the front of her mask, where her mouth would have been.

"Elaina Bishop," Julia scowled.

"What are you doing here?" Nikita asked nervously, hoping that she didn't come across as accusatory with her question. She was too timid to be that confrontational with someone like Elaina. She gulped when Elaina turned to look at her.

"…I'm leaving," Elaina coldly replied. She turned and brusquely walked out the door without another word. Blake glanced at her, but couldn't follow after her yet. He needed to talk to Kitty, this was important.

Blake walked to Kitty's side and looked down at her, his face white with concern.

"Blake…" Kitty murmured.

"What happened?" Blake asked, the quiver in his voice clear to everyone. "Are you… I thought… wasn't Marion helping you control your abilities? So how… why… I don't understand. Are… are you okay, Kitty? What happened?"

Listening him stumble over his words out of worry sent a twinge of pain through Kitty's heart, and the resulting wince made his face pale even more.

"Are you-"

"It's not that," Kitty said, shaking her head, dismissing his concern. "Don't worry about me, Blake, I'm fine. I won."

"But you ended up in the infirmary!" Blake exclaimed.

"That's right, you tell her," Julia said, nodding in agreement. Kitty gave him a sour look.

"I lost control," Kitty said calmly. "That's it. I overdid it a little. But I didn't hurt anyone, I… you know, 'losing control' isn't even the right way to put it! I didn't 'lose' control, I focused my power to get even stronger and let it out! Because I wanted to win! And look what happened, I managed to win!"

"And you hospitalized yourself," Blake reminded her.

"Yeah, but…" Kitty winced again, this time it WAS due to her harmonia. A throb of pain shot through her forehead.

"See?" Blake said, Kitty's migraine proving his point. "The reason that Marion is teaching you how to use your power is so that stuff like this won't happen, so that you won't overdo it and hurt someone, or yourself."

"But if I didn't, then I might not have won," Kitty said. "You… you don't understand. I need to win, Blake, I need to! If I don't, then…"

Kitty hung her head.

"Then I'm just going to stay weak."

"Kitty, you don't need that power of yours to be strong," Blake told her. "You can train with your pokemon and raise their abilities normally, without relying on your harmonia."

"I tried that," Kitty said. "And it wasn't enough! That's why… this power… if I can use it connect more with my pokemon, to link with them, we can grow stronger together, and then we can win! Blake, don't you get it? Stuff is happening! Bad stuff!"

Blake winced. Kitty's tone of voice was something that he had never heard from her before. But it sounded eerily close to a voice that he was quite familiar with. And it was so stunning to hear that he couldn't think of what to say.

"I'm not blind," Kitty continued. "People… people are after me. The Phantom, the Commander, all because of this power of mine. And if I can't do anything, if I just remain a scared, helpless victim, a burden on everyone, then… then it's only going to get worse! Julia nearly got hurt before, who's next, huh? Even today, someone was recording the match to monitor my powers! I can't just sit back and take it slow, or pretend it's not a big deal! People are fighting and hurting each other, and it's over me! But… but if I use this power, if I get strong enough, then maybe…"

Kitty was starting to cry now, too, the pain in her head becoming as unbearable as the surge of grief in her chest.

"Maybe I won't… maybe I won't have to see anyone get hurt anymore… maybe everyone will finally see how strong I am, that I can take care of myself, and fight my own battles… I don't… I don't want to be protected, I want to help…"

Kitty broke down into tears again, cradling her throbbing forehead.

"Just… just go, everyone, please…" she sobbed. "I'll be… I'll be okay, I promise, so… so please, just… just leave me alone for a little bit, okay?"

"Kitty-"

"Go!" Kitty interrupted Julia. She hung her head and nodded, heading outside, followed by an equally Reiner and Nikita. Blake was the only one who didn't obey, remaining at Kitty's side.

"That means you, Blake," Kitty said. "What part of 'alone' did you not understand? I want you to go too, I'm fine. I don't want you here right now. You want me to get rest? Then fine, let me rest instead of standing there all worried."

"Kitty… remember when I told you about my sister?" Blake asked. "I told you earlier, before I told anyone else a thing about her."

"Of course I remember," Kitty said, nodding, looking away from him.

"The reason I told you… it was because I was worried about you," Blake said. "I wanted to share what happened with you, because I was afraid that the same thing might happen to you, that you might get lost in your power and lose sight of yourself."

"I know!" Kitty said, her tone more insistent.

"Then if you know, stop using your harmonia like this, please," Blake said. "My sister, she… she pushed her harmonia, over and over, all to become stronger. And in the end… she lost herself to her strength. I thought it would be okay with you, since you didn't seem like you cared about getting strong as much as you cared about keeping your power under control. But right now… I'm scare that you aren't like that anymore, that you might go down the same path that Gwen went down. I don't… I'm sorry, I'm just scared, Kitty."

"…I understand," Kitty said. Blake didn't want what happened to Gwen happen to her. She didn't want that, either. "I'll… I'll be more careful, I promise. I don't want to lose myself either. But… Blake, you just don't understand. If you could feel this power, then you would get it. There's… there's so much strength coursing through me every time I fight. Even when I keep a tight grip on myself, try to stay focused and in control, I can still end up… I can still end up feeling that rush, like I just have to feel more! It's something that you couldn't understand, Blake, you just couldn't."

"Even if I can't understand it, I can still see that it's a problem," Blake replied. "Kitty, talk to Marion, okay? Let her know what's going on, and see what she says. And until then, don't use your harmonia anymore, okay? Don't let it out, or you might… I don't know, but please. I'm your friend, Kitty, I'm worried about you."

Kitty turned back to him and smiled kindly, placing her hand over his.

"You're a sweetie, Blake," she told him. "Don't worry. I won't let what happened to Gwen happen to me."

Blake wished he could believe that. In this moment, there was nothing he wanted more. He swallowed and nodded his head.

"You aren't alone, Kitty," Blake reassured her. "You have the rest of us that you can rely on, if you need our help. Whatever's going on here, whatever those people want with you, it's okay. We're your friends, and we're here for you, okay? So you can rely on us when you need to."

Kitty resisted the urge to sigh with frustration. The whole point of this was that she didn't WANT to be a burden on her friends, she wanted to show them how strong she was, so they would understand that she wasn't a helpless little girl, but someone they could treat as an equal. But she didn't have the strength to explain that to Blake. So she pushed a smile onto her face and nodded her head.

"Okay."

Blake nodded, feeling a little awkward now that all the serious stuff had passed.

"So, um, you take care of yourself, okay, Kitty?" Blake asked. "Make sure to get a lot of rest, okay? How are your headaches, are they-"

"Blake," Kitty said insistently, Blake shutting up. "I'm okay. I feel fine."

"…Right," Blake said, laughing awkwardly. "Um, get well soon. Bye."

Blake turned and walked to the door, before pausing. He glanced back at Kitty.

"Kitty, this might sound like a stupid question, but… you aren't… you aren't 'seeing things' right?"

Kitty blinked, confused. What did he mean by that? She shook her head.

"Seeing things? Like what?"

"I don't know, just hallucinations or something?" Blake offered awkwardly. He didn't even know what he was suggesting.

Kitty shook her head again.

"…Okay, well, good, that's good," Blake said, nodding. This time he made his exit.

Blake walked out of the room, flustered, his heart pounding in his chest. He was worried and scared, Kitty was just…

I hope she's okay… Blake let out a sigh as he closed the door behind him. He glanced up. As expected, Julia, Nikita, and Reiner were still waiting in the hall, looking expectantly at him. What WAS a surprise was that Elaina had stuck around, as well, waiting a little ways down the hall, leaning back against the wall with her arms crossed in front of her chest.

"She's fine," Blake assured them. "She just… she just needs some rest and some space. For the rest of the day, maybe longer. I don't think we need to worry."

Truthfully, Blake still felt a little worried. There was a nagging feeling in his gut that something was wrong, but he didn't want to pull on it in case it evolved into something worse. Marion had said it herself. There wasn't anything that Blake could do. Harmonia was the problem of the one who had harmonia. Right now, he had to believe that Kitty would be able to get control of this herself, or at the very least, that Marion would be able to help her. If Blake kept pulling, well… he was going to get himself all worked up and worried about something that he couldn't do anything about. That wouldn't help.

So he decided instead that he would just let Kitty handle things, and believe in her. Better than treating her like she couldn't think for herself or didn't know what she was going through, after all. She knew the risks, he'd done all he could.

…So why did he still feel guilty watching his friends' relieved faces, and seeing them glance hopefully at the door behind him?

Blake shook his head. This was the best he could do, for now.

"I'm going to head back with Elaina," Blake said. "We still have some time to get some battles in, it's pretty early. What about you guys?"

"I'll stay here with Kitty," Nikita said. "Even if she doesn't want me in the room, well…"

She glanced at the chair beside the door, and sat down in it.

"I'm her teammate, so it's not like I have anything else I could be doing, you know?" She chuckled awkwardly, the sadness in her voice evident. "Besides, I can get studying done while I'm here!" She set her bag down beside the chair and pulled out her laptop.

"Er… I…"

Julia, honestly, wanted to stay too. But she was worried that Kitty wouldn't want her there. She was concerned about Kitty… but she was concerned about making Kitty's condition even worse. From what little she knew about harmonia, it seemed almost… no, that was impossible.

There was no way that Julia was making Kitty's harmonia act out like this, right?

"I should… probably… leave…" Julia said through gritted teeth, clenching her hands into tight fists. It hurt her to say that, to leave Kitty when her friend needed her most, but if it was true and she was a partial cause of this, then she couldn't just stay here and let her friend suffer even more, could she? No, of course she couldn't. So she wouldn't. Even if she wanted to.

"Yeah, I'll head out with her, too," Reiner said. "We'll go check up on Nick and Will."

"Nick and Will? Are they okay?" Blake asked, widening his eyes. He'd been given a brief, frantic summary from Julia over the phone (he'd been the only one she'd thought to call when it came to the matter of harmonia, not having Marion's number) so he knew they had fought Kitty, but he hadn't even stopped to consider that they might have gotten hurt.

"A few scrapes and cuts, and a big bruise on Will's ego, but beyond that nothing serious," Reiner reassured him. "Still, we told Kitty that they were perfectly fine. If she knew that she had hurt someone on top of losing control like that, well…"

Blake understood, and nodded his head. That was a good call on their part, no sense to make her even more anxious out of potential guilt, and result in her mental state taking another blow that could result in her losing control again.

"Hopefully Marion will know what to do, as for Kitty, let's just give her some space, okay?" He suggested, everyone nodding in agreement. Reiner and Julia headed down the hall towards the section for minor wounds, while Blake walked over to Elaina.

"Thanks for waiting," Blake said. "I can imagine you don't like places like these very much. I know I don't."

"Whatever," Elaina scoffed, pulling forward from the wall. "Let's get going."

Blake nodded and followed her out of the hospital and into the snow. He didn't feel much like talking anyway. There was a lot to think about, and none of it was good. No matter how hard he tried to tell himself not to worry, that things would be okay, he couldn't quite make himself believe it. He was so lost in his thoughts he didn't even notice that Elaina had stopped walking until he bumped into her in surprise.

"Oh! Sorry, I… I was lost in thought, and I-"

"That girl," Elaina said, turning back to him. "Her name is Kitty, right?"

Blake nodded.

"We've met a few times, but this time was… different…" Elaina murmured. "Maybe it's nothing, forget about it-"

"No, tell me!" Blake said, a little more insistently than Elaina had expected. She blinked in surprise behind her mask.

"Uh…"

Blake dropped his hands from her shoulders and recomposed himself, looking seriously at Elaina. This was something important, he couldn't take it lightly.

"What about Kitty?"

Elaina took a moment to get composed herself.

"Maybe it's nothing, but… harmonia, it… it's hard to explain to someone who doesn't have it, but those who do… we can tell. It starts with some light headaches when we're around other people, and as our powers evolve, we begin to get a sense for an… I guess you could call it an 'aura' around our peers with the ability."

"An aura?"

"I really can't describe it," Elaina said, giving him a half-hearted shrug. "But what I know is that each person's is different, with a different feeling. Marion Rivers usually feels calm, warm, and soothing, like a nice river, but yesterday it was like a tidal wave slamming into me. Well, I mean, my harmonia. Ugh, I'm not explaining this properly, just…"

Elaina scratched at her hair, trying to explain.

"That girl, Kitty… when I last saw her, her harmonia was like… like this bright, warm light that engulfed her."

"Okay, so Marion is like a river, and Kitty is like a lightbulb, so-"

"Before," Elaina said, drawing attention to that. "I said 'when I last saw her'. Before."

Blake swallowed. He felt a chill down his back, and it wasn't just from the winter air.

"And… and now?"

"I had to leave earlier because I couldn't look at it," Elaina said, holding her hand in front of her mask, pressing it closer to her mouth to resist the wave of nausea that was roiling back up. "It was so stained and dark, like something… something I can't even explain was seeping its way into her. I don't know why… but I do know that this cursed power… nothing good can come from it. That girl… she's just like me. She might be sweet and kind and nice, but I know what it's like. I wasn't always a monster, Blake. At one point, even I was a sweet little girl. But I started somewhere. And that girl is probably starting down that same path too."

"No, you're wrong, Kitty isn't-"

"Kitty isn't what? She isn't like me?" Elaina asked. Blake flinched. That wasn't what he was going to say, but he couldn't find the words to reject her assertion.

"That…"

"I'm not some sweet, kind little flower, Blake, that part of me died a long time ago. I know as well as anyone that harmonia will twist you, warp you, make you hurt people, make you like it. That girl will be swallowed up by it. I was a good person once, Blake. Now I'm this. And she will be too."

"No," Blake said, shaking his head adamantly. "You aren't a monster, Elaina. And Kitty won't become one, either. I refuse to believe that harmonia is something so sick, so evil, that there is no way back from it. No matter how far gone someone is, no matter how lost they are… they can still come back! They can still be the people they used to be!"

But his words fell on deaf ears.

"Are those words for my sake?" Elaina scoffed. "Because where I'm standing, it seems quite clear that not even you believe what you're saying right now."

Blake couldn't answer her. He hung his head in shame. He wanted to say she was wrong. But for some reason the words just wouldn't come out.

No! I believe that Kitty can bring herself back! That she won't be seduced by the dark side of the harmonia! If Kitty can come back, then doesn't that mean that Elaina isn't too far gone, either? And what about Gwen? There's gotta be a way this can end happily!