Held

by LeBelle

Meeting the guy was hard enough, and the path to happily ever after? Forget it, it never did run smooth.

6. My Tongue

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AN: I spent far more time in the build up to this story than I had originally intended. In my head before I sat down to write it, I was like – ok Kurt's dating Adam, Adam leaves and then can get into the next section of the story. My own summary was prophetic for myself. That's ok though, I like how it turned out and I'll speak to that more at a later juncture once I finish this story and you see why I kind of liked it better drawn out like this, it's just more fitting to the story as a whole. :) I really couldn't rush it any faster than I did and I did fast-forward through that time period without rushing through it. It was definitely necessary for what I was intending to do and still am planning to do. :D Again, I'll speak more to that at the end. Lol.

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6

My Tongue

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Kurt said goodbye to Adam on July 25th with a whole host of friends wishing him off and Sebastian didn't see Kurt again until August 2nd. He didn't know what Kurt was up to in that week. Was he mourning the loss of a long-time boyfriend? Was he afraid Sebastian was going to jump him the second that Adam was gone? Sebastian had certainly thought about doing so.

Yet the way that Adam had been before he left had convinced Sebastian that he had to be better than that. Sebastian had begun to realize that he had become friends with Adam too over the last couple of years. Adam deserved some respect and Sebastian didn't want to step on him like that.

He also didn't want to be a rebound. It was always obvious that Kurt cared about Adam.

They didn't know how to interact with each other now, not after nearly 7 months of pretending that there wasn't more between them. Kurt had point-blank ignored his admission and had continued on with Adam as if nothing had changed.

Was that pure loyalty or had he been confused or something in between? If he had felt that way, did he feel that way still? Sebastian's feelings hadn't budged an inch over the last, what was it – two plus years now? Kurt and Adam had been dating nearly 3 years, that was a very long relationship in Sebastian's opinion. Of course, he didn't know when their anniversary was, nobody had ever mentioned it to him. It could be longer or shorter than 3 years for all he knew.

Sebastian finally texted him and asked him to meet. He didn't plan on it being a date, he reiterated that 5x in the text. He just missed his friend and wanted to see him. This was the longest they'd gone since Christmas without seeing each other.

Kurt had concurred and they met at what Sebastian considered their place even though others, including Kurt's now ex, had joined them at.

Kurt came in and gave him a very wobbly smile, attempting to be at peace and nonchalant but failing, he too knew what this meeting was about. His smile slipped off quickly when he conceded that he was not doing well. He slipped into the seat across from Sebastian and Sebastian just soaked him up. He was dressed somewhat casually for his typical style, but it was summer and even then it was fashionable with summer loafers and shorts, not cotton nor jean material, that ended below his knees and a, Sebastian smirked because of all the times Kurt made fun of him for wearing them, a polo shirt, opened at the throat and a pair of sunglasses on top of his head. He looked somewhat like a stylish possible tourist, actually, or just coming back from the Hamptons.

Sebastian said as much and Kurt grinned at him, totally back in his wheelhouse when talking about clothes. "You saved me from a long weekend with Rachel and Blaine. We were going to go to the beach and you should know just from looking at me how my skin would do. I don't know what either of them were thinking by inviting me along. I said yes as long as nothing else popped up. Your message popped up just as we were about to leave."

"What did you end up telling them?"

"That I had a very important meeting crop up." It wasn't a lie and the reminder had Kurt falling silent again.

"So you weren't avoiding me?" Sebastian checked.

"Avoiding? Sebastian!" Kurt rolled his eyes fondly. "Why would I be avoiding you? We're friends and you know I'm still working while everyone else has the summer off."

"I know, I just... well... you know why I texted you right?"

Sebastian watched Kurt's Adam's apple bob as he swallowed hard. He took that as a yes. "It's an inappropriate time." Kurt finally said. "I just said goodbye to Adam."

"Yes, I know, I was there." Sebastian cut in. "And I'm not suggesting right now, I just wanted to check in with you, see if you felt the same way still."

"Is it that hard to tell?" Kurt played with the bracelet around his wrist.

"You kept dating a different guy."

"As I told you I would." Kurt pointed out. "You agreed that it wouldn't go any further after that. You even seemed to become better friends with him after that."

"Yeah, I know." Sebastian shook his head, letting his hair get out of place. He didn't notice Kurt reach out to fix it until he felt his fingers soothe it back. Sebastian nearly sank into that touch and purred but Kurt's fingers were gone just as quickly. He was looking at his hand as if he didn't know what it was up to, as if it had a mind of it's own. "Today's more about timing than anything else. I wanted to check in with you to find out, A if you were still interested and B when would be a good time to go on a first date."

"I think we should give it a month." Kurt answered, honesty in his eyes. "It'll give me time to be by myself for a change and it will make things easier for everyone else and hopefully Adam won't feel so betrayed if we wait for over a month since the breakup."

"You mean another month from now?" Sebastian checked, not super excited to have to wait that long, but he supposed he could do it, he'd already waited as long as he had for the opportunity. Sebastian did a quick calculation, the time when they were able to start dating would be after their trip to London, it wouldn't even be anything they could announce to anyone else at that point. "And then what?"

"We date, we take it slow, we get to know each other in the romantic sense and when the time is right, if it's right, take it further." Kurt nodded to himself, pleased with himself and his own plan. "Give you time to wrap your head around being a boyfriend and we can end it if it doesn't make any sense before either of us get in too deep."

Sebastian opened his mouth and then closed it. He didn't want to scare Kurt off when he didn't even know how he could describe his feelings. He didn't have a name for them. Until he did, he didn't want to say anything out loud least he give Kurt the wrong idea or palpitations. He could follow Kurt's timeline, he could, but he knew that he wouldn't call in the towel until he'd at least had Kurt in his bed once. Until they went all the way, neither would know anything for sure. That would clarify so many things for Sebastian.

"It's unlike you to hold your tongue." Kurt pointed out, further away from Sebastian than he'd ever been during these meetups. It was ironically directly opposed to what they were supposed to be about today.

"I think you're still underestimating me and my desire for this relationship."

"I hope you don't hold it against me to remain reasonably skeptical until I see it in action." Kurt was strangely hurtful in his words.

"You don't really want this." Sebastian accused. "Or me. If you did, you wouldn't be so harsh."

"The trouble is, I do and it's so unique for me. I'm more suspicious of myself than of you. I'm sorry if I hurt you while I reconfigure my brain and way of thinking. We know each other, we're friends and I like you as a friend and in this way too. I have... well, I don't trust myself and my choices quite often when it comes to men."

"Adam was a perfect boyfriend and friend." Sebastian shifted. "You're always going to be comparing me to him and I'll always come up short, especially as I haven't really done the boyfriend thing. I dabbled in it but those didn't last long at all."

"I can assure you, that's one thing I won't be doing." Kurt promised.

"How can you not?" Sebastian countered. "Everyone always compares to what they know."

Kurt shook his head and this time reached out for Sebastian's hand. "I won't be, ok?" Then he smiled wickedly and Sebastian had never seen that side of him. "Not on the boyfriend side of things at least."

"Oh, is that a challenge?" Sebastian's eyes became fairly dangerous themselves.

"Not yet but it certainly will be when the time is right." Kurt's fingers danced along the back of Sebastian's hand before sliding away. He didn't take it all the way back across the table though, just rested it lightly around his cup. Sebastian had ordered ahead and so it was ready for him. "Look, I'm sorry, ok? I know I'm coming off hot and cold and I assure you that I want this, I want to try to do this thing with you. I'm just really afraid too, ok?"

"I get it. I'm terrified." Sebastian admitted and he didn't think he'd ever said he was scared to anyone since he was a little kid. Even then he tried to be macho and appear unafraid even it was stamped clearly on his face. He would deny it the whole time.

They finished their coffees in a fashion that they were used to, not pushing things right now. They had another month before they could even figure out this dating thing. Kurt would be busier in some ways come mid-August but in some ways things would settle down more. He wouldn't be able to run all over like he was now but school would be starting up again, his senior year and Rachel would be expecting him to do things with her too. Sebastian's own schedule would get a little tighter as he went back to classes.

It made sense to try starting this in September when they'd been back for awhile and things settled down into a somewhat sane pattern. They'd know how to fit each other in better then too.

Sebastian and Kurt didn't have any plans or anywhere to be. Sebastian had been Kurt's excuse out of a weekend commitment and Sebastian had the summer off to do whatever he wanted. He had picked up an internship but it was a slow Friday and he didn't have to be there again until Monday.

Still, they got up to leave when they finished their coffees. During the school year they'd stay and order another round while studying but neither needed it right now. Kurt didn't even look at his phone. He'd asked for the day off and Isabelle had surprisingly respected it. She was deep in the midst of picking new interns though, so maybe that was part of it. Though at the same time, she should have been calling Kurt more to help her out with them.

They went outside together, reluctant to leave but lingering was unlike each of them. Someone bumped into Sebastian from behind as they were definitely on a different schedule and pace to the two of them. Sebastian stepped forward into Kurt's space as an effort to keep his balance and Kurt's arms went around his waist, they supported each other after the jostling. Their close proximity wasn't lost on either of them and Sebastian's head turned toward Kurt to apologize, his head tipping down as Kurt's tipped up and their lips brushed.

Fire snaked through Sebastian's veins and his hands moved on their own accord, pulling Kurt closer, one hand clenching the fabric at the small of Kurt's back and the other wrapping around the back of his head, his fingers burying into the short hairs there. Kurt's hands tightened around his waist, drawing himself in even closer, his mouth matching Sebastian's brush for brush, press for press.

"Shit, Kurt." Sebastian gasped against his mouth. "We said-."

"I know." Kurt pressed his mouth more firmly against Sebastian's. "I know, I know." His hands moved and Sebastian thought he was releasing him, cooler heads prevailing and all that. Instead they slid up Sebastian's chest and then around his shoulders and neck. "Screw convention, we've been friends for so long, it's akin to have been dating for months."

Sebastian wanted to argue, they had both made really good points about school, Adam, their friends, the speed of which they were going to go, but then his tongue was in Kurt's mouth and he threw all that out.

His apartment wasn't far from the coffee shop and he had no idea how they'd gotten there but they were inside it now and were kicking off shoes. Sebastian guided Kurt to his room. He'd never invited Kurt over before, didn't let Santana either. He couldn't handle Kurt in his space without breaking all the rules and ruining a few friendships. Santana had respected that.

They were in his bedroom, Kurt's shirt was flung somewhere and Sebastian was nearly naked save for his socks and boxers. He was undoing Kurt's pants, hoping to get him in the same state of undress when Kurt pulled back. Something flashed in his eyes that had Sebastian stopping without even needing to hear Kurt say anything or do anything.

"We haven't discussed so much-" He started, giving Kurt an out. He didn't bother talking with his one-night stands about anything, neither cared about making the other comfortable. There was an unwritten rule for those kinds of hookups that if they wanted something they would take it but if the other said no, then you didn't cross that line. You had to vocalize your nos; unless the other was too drunk then you didn't touch them at all and let them sleep it off. It was the complete opposite of conventional relationships except that drunk rule.

Kurt looked like he wanted to say something and then he shook his head deciding against saying what was passing through his mind right then. Instead, he pushed Sebastian onto the bed, he landed on his back. "Only one preference, really. I am never under you."

"I can handle that." Sebastian grasped at Kurt's hips, already losing his ability to focus on what he'd seen in Kurt's eyes, losing his best intentions to the prospect of having Kurt fully with him. "Too many clothes." He protested as Kurt came down over him. They slipped the pants off and every other layer in their way, pressing kisses to any parts of the body they could reach. Their mouths met up constantly, fingers intertwining and palms pressing together.

Their exploration of each other's bodies lasted for what seemed like forever and not nearly long enough. He could spend eternity exploring Kurt's body and letting him touch and explore his in return. The slide of their skin against each other was delicious and gorgeous and for awhile he lost track of what was touching what, just basking in the glorious feel of Kurt against him.

Kurt helped him prep and that was such a turn on. He didn't really know what to expect but from what he'd seen, he'd feared that he'd be like Elliott and just lay back and let Sebastian do all the work. For a second he thought maybe Kurt was going to want to top since he slicked up his fingers and played with Sebastian, slipping one in and causing Sebastian nearly to have an orgasm then and there. He worked Sebastian over for a little before wiping his hand off and sliding a condom onto Sebastian before slicking up Sebastian's fingers and guiding him to his own entrance.

Sebastian found Kurt's eyes, checking in with him as he slipped a finger in. Kurt ground down on him and twisted his hips and nodded that Sebastian didn't have to wait that long before moving on to more digits. Kurt reached for the lube and lathered Sebastian up, slipping off Sebastian's fingers and moving to position himself over Sebastian. He lowered himself slowly, not because of the potential for pain, but because they both wanted to savor the moment. He wanted to draw it out for as long as possible, let them feel every single part of this with such exquisite detail and sense memory.

"God, Kurt, you're more than I could have ever imagined." He whispered along the line of Kurt's neck, pressing kisses but not marking him up. He had enough sense to know that Kurt would be under a long line of fire if any of his friends saw that. "You're amazing."

Kurt had no breath, all of it had left him somewhere along the first orgasm and he hadn't gotten it back. "Not... disappointed?"

"No pedestal could have matched up with the heights you've taken me to." Sebastian confirmed. Sebastian didn't know what did it. The sex was mind-blowing fantastic but nothing he hadn't technically done before. Perhaps it was the connection he had with Kurt that made it so much more? Maybe it was just Kurt himself or the way their bodies responded to each other. Or it was all of it. "Anything like you imagined?"

"Better." Kurt announced, his hands pressing down on Sebastian's shoulders to give them a little bit of space. "Nothing at all like I imagined, actually and so, so much better." He swooped in for another kiss.

Their gym acrobatics lasted another few rounds, with a few breaks between to laugh and joke and talk and a few showers. Kurt's head was pillowed on Sebastian's shoulder, looking up at him as they chatted about nothing in particular but whatever it was, helped bring them even closer. They needed a moment between rounds to just connect in other ways, to cement this as more than a haze of sex. It made it all the more real.

They had been intending for one more round before calling it a night, it was far later than either had imagined but the sun having gone down and the clock reading that it was two AM were both tell-tale announcements that they'd been at it for hours. Kurt suggested going home but Sebastian wouldn't hear of it. "It's not safe."

"I've done it a million times before." Kurt was in no hurry to move away from his spot cuddled into Sebastian's side. He looked like a cat, happy, fed, tired out and warm. Sebastian stroked the back of his ear, unintentionally playing into that image. He wasn't even arguing, just putting it out there.

"Yeah but never after leaving my bed." Sebastian wrapped a leg around Kurt's, just in case he had any thoughts about changing his mind. "You don't need to go anywhere. I'm not even close to done with you yet and you going across town is a needless waste of time and energy."

"Hmm." Kurt agreed happily, snuggling in more. "I'm glad we're in agreement."

"You just want me to know you can." Sebastian didn't want to take it the wrong way.

"I just want you to know that I'm not pushing things onto you. That I'm a strong male that can take care of himself and you don't need to feel guilty if you wanted me to leave."

"Do I look like I want you to go? I finally got you here. There's no way in hell I'm letting you leave any time soon. We have an entire weekend together before anyone gets concerned about your whereabouts." All the more reason Kurt shouldn't go home tonight. Sebastian dropped a kiss to the top of Kurt's head. "If you were to go back at this time of night, I'd call you a car." And a bodyguard, but Sebastian didn't add that part. Getting in and out of cars in certain areas could be dangerous, especially at different times of the day.

"The subway is fine." Kurt started but Sebastian's shudder caused him to chuckle. "Such a elitist." He poked Sebastian into the side.

"I know, I know, but we've always taken a car or a taxi if I was feeling a little risky. I've never taken the subway to your place." He hadn't taken a subway all that often actually.

"People will look at me oddly in that neighborhood if I'm taking a car all the time. It'll actually paint a target on me." Kurt pointed out and Sebastian should have let it drop, but instead it opened the door to ask what he'd wondered for awhile.

"You're making decent money now, why do you still live there? It's not close to your school, at all, nor is it close to Rachel's."

"I don't know." Sebastian felt Kurt shift against him and he pulled him in closer, not wanting to lose that warmth. "It's home, I guess."

"Hmm." Sebastian finally let it drop, Kurt could make his own decisions and so far it had been fine. The second that it wasn't, Sebastian would push. He ran his fingers through Kurt's hair, helping him relax against him again and Kurt settled in. It worked too well because he felt Kurt's breathing even out. Kurt's rhythmic breathing pulled Sebastian under with him moments later.

Like Sebastian had said earlier, it didn't matter, this would just lead them to waking up earlier and continuing where they left. They had all weekend.

Sebastian was more used to late hours and waking early than Kurt. It gave him time to lay there in bed and soak in his presence. He memorized every detail of his face and how he slept with his hand tucked under his cheek. He looked so peaceful and innocent and Sebastian reveled at having Kurt here with him like this.

It had been everything and more than he'd ever hoped for. Each time better than the time before as they got to know each other's bodies and how they ticked. They had more time to leisurely explore too, sometimes they were faster and sometimes slower. The urgency wasn't quite as prevalent but still there, still wanting to find that completion with the other. He wanted to remember every detail of being with Kurt, so it would sustain him while they weren't together and compare it to when they got together again. He didn't know how long this would last and he didn't want to forget a single moment, no matter how many moments they created.

At this point, Sebastian never wanted this to end. He thought about waking Kurt up while he was so hard for the other male but he could see the dark circles under his eyes. He wasn't getting enough sleep, Sebastian realized, and would let him sleep in a little. He didn't know the next time Kurt could sleep in, except maybe tomorrow morning. It was fine, he just took that time to watch Kurt and enjoy in the fact that he'd finally gotten Kurt where he wanted him. He basked in the knowledge that they were now together and he wouldn't let anything interfere with that.

He was so lost in Kurt's presence that he didn't hear Santana come home. He heard her when his door opened though. He turned to her gesturing to be quiet and to push her back out again. He tried to hide Kurt from her view too, that knowledge could wait.

"Bas, I typically wait for you to urge your conquests out of your room before I complete the process and kick them out of the apartment but I don't have time to play that game today. You and I are due at Hummel's in about an hour and a half and I don't want to be late. There's no way I am going to sit through that bitch-fest because you made me late."

"Shh!" Sebastian hissed at her and grabbed the still damp towel from the chair next to him and wrapped it around his waist as he got up and pushed her back out. "Quiet, he's still sleeping."

"Tired him out, did you?" She had on a jagged smile, half proud of him and half annoyed that he was letting the interloper sleep. "We're leaving in thirty, I don't care if I have to go in there and pull him out by his hair."

They'd thought about waiting to tell Santana but she was going to find out anyway. Part of Sebastian wanted to be naughty and let her find out when she did. Yet at the same time, he didn't want her disturbing Kurt.

"Kurt will be fine if we're late. He's not even going to be there if you get there on time." Sebastian predicted and Santana was already back in the living room as he joined her, closing the door softly behind him.

A brow was high on her forehead. "Oh yeah? What makes you say that?"

"Let's just say I know he didn't spend the night at home last night."

"Did he go to the beach house after all?" Santana asked. "He must be fried to a crisp, poor boy, if he's going to be coming back to meet up with us instead of staying until tomorrow afternoon. Did he text you to let you know he was going to be late?"

"Something like that." Sebastian didn't recall them agreeing to going to meet up with Kurt today, but a lot had happened. He was tired himself. "Why don't you make coffee and I'll be out as soon as I can?"

He really wanted to go back in there and sleep some more with Kurt. He had been tired out but he had boundless energy, or so he'd been told. Besides, it was about time they faced off with Santana. She'd barge in again if he didn't join her in the kitchen in a timely manner.

So he took another shower, roused Kurt gently with a kiss and told him he'd be outside in the kitchen with coffee. He joined Santana at the center island and the bar seating there. They chatted for awhile. They could both hear Kurt turning on the water for a shower.

"Where'd you find this one?" Santana asked mildly interested.

"Coffee shop."

"Oh no, Sebastian, that's the worst place to pick someone up, especially where you and Kurt frequent!" She was worried for him and Sebastian wanted to see if she'd put things together on her own. "Crap, how am I going to convince this one to beat it?"

Sebastian opened his mouth, but then held his tongue. He was going to tell her that he didn't want this one to go, but he was kind of curious to see how these two would play the game. Of course they knew each other but would Santana just start in or would she look at who he brought home first?

Kurt came out in Sebastian's robe and a towel around his head, using the end to pat at his skin to help try it faster. He was humming and Santana rolled her eyes and pulled her shoulders back.

She put on her best impersonation of Rachel. "How could you! Sebastian you promised me that you weren't going to bring girls back here anymore but I didn't expect you to start bringing back guys! I swear, if I believed in divorce I'd have you in the court system so fast-."

Kurt had spun, not realizing Santana was here too, his chest was heaving at the loud screeches though he should be used to it with Rachel. Maybe the time and place had taken him aback. Maybe it was Santana's words. Kurt recovered himself quickly but he just started laughing and he laughed hard and long.

Santana was annoyed at the laughter. She turned to him, already on a tirade. "Oh, that didn't work, did it? Well too bad, you're going out the door. I don't have time or the patience to explain it to you, just know that I'm saving you a lot of future pain- KURT?" She spun on Sebastian when she realized it really was Kurt and that Sebastian was laughing. "What the hell are you thinking?" She raged at Sebastian. "This is the very worst possible timing!"

Sebastian pushed away from the counter and went around to wrap his arm around Kurt's waist. "This is one guy I don't want you scaring off." Sebastian bent to kiss Kurt on the lips.

"But- he just broke up with his boyfriend last week." Santana cried. "This is going to end in disaster!"

"Thanks 'Tana." Sebastian said dryly, pulling Kurt more firmly into his arms and wrapping both around him.

"Oh God, I'm sorry." Santana bounded over to them and threw her arms around both of them. "I'm happy for the two of you, I am. I know at first I was against this relationship but I was more worried about how Sebastian would cut and run the second he found himself faced with anything serious. He's changed, grown since we've moved out to New York." She said quickly. "I'm just a little worried about the timing of it, is all. I want the two of you to be together for a good long time."

Kurt laughed. "You don't see me running, do you? I'm well aware of how the timing looks." Kurt looked up at Sebastian and smiled broadly at him. "Yesterday I might have shared those worries and then some, but I am at ease now."

"When did you make plans with Santana?" Sebastian asked, tightening his hold on Kurt in response to what he said.

"Oh, when you were trashing the cups. I told her today would be fine. I clear forgot about it when our plans changed." Sebastian nodded along with what Kurt said. He supposed Santana could have text him to firm up plans as well and he never would have seen them. She just assumed he would go along with them since it was with her and Kurt. Whatever guy in his bed would be kicked out whether or not he was planning on a weekend thing at the prospect of hanging out with the two of them. This way worked out better, two birds, one stone.

Kurt turned to face Santana and leaned back against Sebastian's chest, letting his arms embrace him even more. He was encapsulated by Sebastian like that and Sebastian's chin rested on the top of Kurt's head. She melted a little as an internal squee wanted to bust forth at how cute and right they looked together. It was a long time in coming.

"We agreed that you could know, you're pretty good at keeping things quiet when you want to." Kurt started. "We want to keep it a bit quiet though because not everyone will understand how this could be so soon, they'll wonder if we cheated and we didn't."

"No, no, of course not." Santana would have seen a change in them, in Sebastian especially, if they had. She knew him too well and lived with him. "I won't tell anyone, I promise." She hesitated and looked at Sebastian in concern. "How long are you thinking of waiting to tell everyone?"

"One month from now." Kurt explained. "It will be a good cover for time and it'll be after we go to England... I don't want to hurt Adam unnecessarily. Maybe we could say something about the romance of the city got to us and opened our eyes to each other?" Kurt wasn't sure what he would say. "And then it was only supposed to be us dating but it's going to be hard enough to pretend like nothing's happened that when we can start being more open in public it'll likely be floodgates."

"Well you told me, and I'm the only one that's important." Santana beamed. Kurt wasn't trying to keep this a secret but knew what he wanted and wanted to keep from hurting everyone. "Elliott's going to be pissed."

"He already knows." Kurt sighed and looked at them. "He told me that Sebastian and him would have never worked out because they were both interested in the same guy and it wasn't each other." Kurt shifted uncomfortably. "Sebastian and I already talked about it by the time it came up with Elliott. I wasn't expecting it from him too though. He was surprisingly cool about it though, knowing I didn't return his feelings. He read between the lines when I didn't say the same about Sebastian's. He's kept my secret, he'll be expecting something to happen soon."

"I didn't know that." Sebastian had obviously known that Elliott was attracted to Kurt, had looked to him again and again but not that he still felt that way or told Kurt.

"Yeah, he said that he was cool being just friends, he just needed to admit his feelings out loud for his own sake." Kurt linked his hand with Sebastian's over his stomach, attempting to keep him there. Sebastian wasn't foolish enough to pull away, he wasn't going to let any unnecessary space get between them. He had three other guys interested in Kurt and to act like a foolish jealous ass would open the door for them to try and get closer. He didn't want to give them that space.

Sebastian's cheek found the top of Kurt's head instead of his chin. "Makes sense, I'm surprised more guys haven't befriended you or hit on you." Sebastian saw Kurt close his eyes through the mirror on the wall, soaking in Sebastian's touch. He rubbed his cheek against Kurt's hair and Kurt's reaction was priceless. "Do we really have to spend the day with Santana?"

She scowled. "Yes!" He looked to Santana with puppy-dog eyes and she bent a little. "I wasn't planning on meeting up with Kurt for another hour or so... I can wait that long." She shooed them back toward the bedroom. That was a bit far for Kurt and he dragged his feet.

"Not while Santana is out here listening to us!"

"I'm going to go to my room. I'll listen to music."

"But still, you'll know-."

"Get over it, Kurt. We're going to be in the same apartment a lot with one of us having sex and the other knowing about it. Didn't you have that same set up with Rachel at some point?"

She made excellent points and Sebastian nodded along enthusiastically and Kurt looked to him, a little nonplussed. "Come on Kurt, a bed beckons." Sebastian tried to sound as seductive as he possibly could, as much as he ever had, more so even. Kurt became boneless and let Sebastian pull him back into the room. Santana purposefully turned up her music loudly to give him some cover and reassurance. Sebastian thanked her silently for her thoughtfulness for a change. Sebastian's mouth found Kurt's shoulder and he nipped and sucked and licked and Kurt melted even more into his arms and let Sebastian guide him to the bed.

–

They had a bit more time before Santana would be knocking down their door. Sebastian drew patterns on Kurt's stomach with the tip of his finger. He was enjoying how his skin shivered and shuddered, retracted and moved toward his finger in turns, depending on how sensitive any given spot was or how he touched it, with what kind of pressure or part of his finger. "You really didn't have any feelings toward me until after New Years?" Sebastian just found that so implausible, he'd wanted Kurt with the same intensity the entire time, now that he'd had Kurt, it had only grown.

"Seb..." Kurt placed his hand over Sebastian's, stopping him so they could have the serious conversation without any distractions. "I don't allow myself to feel for anyone else when I'm in a relationship, especially when it's in a good place. I don't even really look unless you're a model or an actor and then it's only more as a joke because they're on a screen and not real. I push it out, compartmentalize it and refuse to evaluate any of it. There were times when your touch pushed through that boundary I drew in the sand but then I would just retract further away, not allowing even that to penetrate my happy bubble. You don't have to worry about my attention moving onto someone else. Even before I started dating, I told myself that if I was going to be in a relationship, then I would be in a relationship and nothing outside of that relationship mattered or existed, even if it had in the past. I'm all in with my relationships. I only ever liked one guy at a time even if I wasn't in a relationship. Me acknowledging I had feelings for you while dating Adam was a fluke and was partly homesickness and knowing that Adam and I weren't going to last, the ending was clearly coming."

"Yet you stayed with him nearly another 7 months."

"Because we were in a relationship and I still cared about him. If I were ever married and we hit a rocky spot, I wouldn't fill it in with someone else. Someone might be able to break through my walls but I'd reinforce them and push him back out. I commit to people until the relationship is over and I never accept the relationship is over because of another guy entering the picture. On my side it'll never matter because I'll never do anything about it. For him, if it does matter, then it matters. I won't be in a three person relationship."

"I'm not sure if I should be offended or reassured with that." Sebastian teased. "I wasn't enough to break through."

"No, but if I was single and you were both wanting to date me, I would choose you." Kurt looked away and then back again and Sebastian knew there was more to that answer. He attempted to push but Kurt shook his head. "Don't ask me, not right now to clarify anything. I don't want to talk about him, I want to focus on us. I don't want to take away from these first days with my messy history. I'll tell you everything you need to know at a future time."

Sebastian sighed and leaned down to press a kiss against Kurt's chest, then another to Kurt's lips. "I don't want to talk about him either right now." It was going to be a topic brought up enough by others in the future anyway. Sebastian had to be content with Kurt's answer, he'd chosen him over Elliott and Blaine after all. Not that it was that much of a competition.

Sebastian wondered how Kurt could call his own history messy when they were both aware of Sebastian's past. That reminder was enough to help Sebastian move beyond any lingering questions he had. He also had a past he didn't want to dwell in, nothing quite as recent as Kurt's but still pretty recent and relevant.

–

Their day out with Santana was like any day out with her except Sebastian's hand kept sneaking into Kurt's back pocket and resting on that perfect mound of flesh. Sometimes he squeezed but usually he just let it lay there, cupping it. Kurt squealed the first couple of times he did that and contorted himself into a million different poses to get away from the hand without just pulling it away, not wanting to draw attention. He more than drew attention when he did that though. Eventually he became wise to it and more discretely pulled away. He was getting used to it though and so Sebastian thought of other ways to shock him without getting him angry and stalking away.

Santana rolled her eyes at them in exasperation occasionally but she didn't call them out on it or tell them to stop. There was an amused grin peaking out with each sigh.

This was really risky in some ways, there were still plenty of friends in the city that word could get back to others. Yet, they also needed it and just didn't know it until then. They could have been perfectly happy holed up together in a sex nest but getting validated so early on with a trusted friend was also nice.

Kurt would slap his hand away if it got too intimately located but would then link his fingers with Sebastian's. "How are you such a sex god in bed but then so modest out in the real world?"

"I have decorum." Kurt said haughtily with his nose up in the air but his side eye ruined it and they both broke down into laughter. Sebastian wouldn't admit that it was borderline giggles.

Sebastian would have to be content with the fact that Kurt did allow him to touch him in public even slightly indecently, something he'd never seen with Adam, and that Kurt reached for him in return. He might not lavish sexual attention onto him but it was more than the sweet interactions he'd seen with Adam. It was the sweetness but something more too. Kurt just wanted to be close to Sebastian, wanted a connection at all times. He even snuggled into Sebastian's side at times when they were pretty much alone but would always hesitate, as if unsure if Sebastian would be ok with it.

Sebastian was practically groping Kurt every two seconds, he didn't know why Kurt wouldn't think he would be ok with the physical touches. Santana had brought them to an art gallery and they stood in front of one piece for a long time. Sebastian wrapped his arms around Kurt's middle, chin on Kurt's shoulder and both stood and appreciated it, absorbing it.

"I'll buy it." Sebastian eventually said.

"That will look nice in your apartment." It would too but Sebastian had been thinking more for Kurt's. Even Rachel and Blaine would appreciate this piece. More people would see it at Kurt's than his and it should be seen.

"I was thinking there was a wall that needed it in your place."

"It's outrageously expensive, Seb." Kurt shook his head no. "If you want it, then go ahead and spend your money how you see fit but you're not buying it for me."

Sebastian sighed, he wanted to buy it for Kurt. It had stopped both in their tracks but he got it. It was early in their relationship, they weren't even officially out to the majority of their friends and didn't have a label yet. Sebastian couldn't stand the idea of never seeing the piece again though and so did have it delivered to his apartment, there was a wall it would work on too.

He left Kurt long enough to square that away. While he was gone, Santana linked arms with Kurt and they were deep in some kind of conversation when Sebastian came back. She totally had Sebastian's back, Sebastian couldn't help the quirk of his lips. She kept glaring at guys who tried to approach the two of them. She turned that glare on him for the briefest of seconds before registered it was him. She dropped the glare but not Kurt's arm or the conversation. Sebastian stopped next to them to look at the new piece they were admiring and he was surprised to feel a hand slip into his.

He looked over to Kurt who was looking at him questioningly and he squeezed it in reassurance. Kurt smiled brightly at him and then went back to what he was saying to Santana. He wasn't cut out, but the conversation didn't need to include him. He brought Kurt's hand up to his lips and kissed the back of it. It felt so easy, all these things that he'd seen before but had never been attempted to do just rolled right out of him with Kurt as the recipient.

That wasn't entirely true, Sebastian had wanted to do these things, had envisioned doing so with Kurt for some time now. He had tried not to dwell on it too much, wanting to stay in the safe realm of what he knew, making things a lot more base. Still, he'd thought about it.

It was worth it to see Kurt's face brighten up like that, to ease the worry out of his eyes. It was Sebastian putting that look there. Sebastian never thought he'd make anyone happy like this.

It was going to be hell over this next month not being able to continue touching Kurt like this in public.

They still had one more day before reality settled upon them.

Santana left them alone on Sunday and they spent most of the day in bed, just exploring each other all over again and again. Sebastian was glad that Kurt was in agreement with him, they'd swung over to Kurt's on Saturday morning for not just a change of clothes for the day but for the entire weekend.

All too soon though, Rachel was calling, wondering where Kurt was and that she wanted to get dinner with him and Blaine. "All weekend together and they're still not sick of each other." Kurt rolled his eyes and he slid over Sebastian to get out of bed. Sebastian halted his progress to steal a kiss.

"Nothing like us." Sebastian teased.

"This is different, we're different." Kurt pressed another kiss to Sebastian's mouth. It wasn't even evening yet and Sebastian reluctantly let Kurt take the subway back. Kurt made a good point that it would be too telling if Sebastian's car dropped him off with an overnight bag. He would already have to think of a good excuse to have the overnight bag filled with 'casual' clothes.

"When will I see you again?" Sebastian asked, stretching out to fill the bed and soak up it's warmth.

"Text me and we'll figure it out." Kurt tossed silkily at him as he got dressed and Sebastian thought that's where he would leave it. It was a bit disappointing. Kurt regarded him and his reaction as he buttoned up his shirt. "If nothing else we'll have our coffee date."

Sebastian grinned lazily at him as he repeated Kurt's words. "Coffee date."

"Yep." Kurt came closer but already was too smart to let himself get too close. He bent for another kiss. "Text me, we'll work out the details for the next meeting, ok?"

"Ok." Sebastian agreed and didn't grab at Kurt to bring him back to bed. He prioritized seeing Kurt again over getting a bit frisky. Kurt had to appear somewhat untouched when he got home and Sebastian didn't want him looking bemused on the subway.

Over the course of the month it was obvious to anyone who was looking at them and actually seeing them that there was something new going on between them. There was a time when the five of them got together for a dinner and Rachel and Blaine both claimed spots beside him and Santana beat him to sitting across from Kurt. There were times when Sebastian would make a joke and others would laugh but Kurt would have a softer smile on his face tossed his way. Or he would look at Sebastian over his shoulder or eyes would linger.

Sebastian knew he wasn't doing much better keeping off his face or his interactions. He was guilty for coming up behind Kurt and whispering naughty innuendos before walking away. He left both of them keening for more when he did that. Sometimes they weren't even innuendos, just sexy talk, often dirty compliments.

Sometimes if he knew he wouldn't get caught, his hand would stray to places that weren't exactly appropriate for their setting.

Kurt slipped away from the others and met him at his apartment or they'd just 'disappear' for awhile when they went out. Rachel dragged Kurt to a club with her and Blaine and Kurt told Sebastian where he'd be. Sebastian went without Santana in tow because he didn't want her presence giving his away. They met up in one of the back rooms, Kurt wouldn't agree to anything that would get them kicked out or arrested. Still, they had fun making out under the noses of the other two.

Kurt was still busy and so they didn't see each other nearly as much as Sebastian would have hoped and it was usually with at least one other person. They couldn't exactly explain why they wanted to be alone until they started 'dating'. Still, they managed to get a couple of dates in there, alone, during that month.

Then they were in London.

He forgot what they'd been arguing over. It hadn't been anything important but Sebastian supposed both of their anxieties were high. They didn't come right out and say it and it was under the guise of something else, but he knew it was about Adam.

Sebastian was worried that Kurt would go back to Adam now that he saw him again after so much time apart. Three years was not nothing.

He wondered where Kurt's anxiety sprung from. Santana suggested while they got ready for the theater that it might have to do with feeling guilty. Did Kurt feel guilty about getting together with Sebastian so quickly? Did he regret it?

Being Sebastian, he did the dick move while they sat in the theater, his hand slid to Kurt's upper thigh, trying to break the weird tension between them. Kurt's fingers dug painfully into his wrist as he lifted his hand subtly off of his leg and put it back in Sebastian's lap. Sebastian swore he lost feeling in that hand for a good twenty minutes. Kurt was not pleased and after intermission switched spots with Santana so she sat between them.

Being Santana, she did, the bitch.

Afterward, Kurt was the first that Adam spotted in the crowd and came over, still dripping sweat and in his stage makeup. Kurt didn't protest when Adam engulfed him in a hug, even hugging him back. Adam pressed a kiss to Kurt's cheek and got lost in his enthusiasm of seeing Kurt and his first big show. "It's so good to see you, Love." Kurt matched his excitement, honestly and truly happy for Adam. Sebastian's stomach tightened at the endearment and Kurt not doing anything or saying anything to dissuade him from using it.

Eventually Adam realized he forgot to thank the other two for coming or acknowledge them. He went in for a hug and Santana let him and a kiss on a cheek from each. However, Sebastian gave a clear, don't even try vibe. Adam settled for a handshake.

He brought them over to meet the rest of his guests there that night, his parents and a couple of friends. Sebastian eyed the mix, wondering if any of these were the ones that had given Kurt such a hard time. They greeted Kurt somewhere between polite and warmish.

"Welcome back, Pet." Adam's mother hugged him tightly and waxed poetry about how they were still friends even after breaking up and that distance between them. She thanked him for coming.

Nobody called him and Sebastian out for being more than friends that night. Though a couple of Adam's friends eyed him up or flirted with him. Throughout the night, Kurt's back got stiffer and stiffer and thankfully Santana was there to throw an elbow into Kurt's side to remind him to chill. She also sent Sebastian a stink eye, daring him to try something.

Sebastian was honestly not interested. He barely acknowledged their interest and only lighted flirted, nothing ostentatious or anything that was taken seriously by the other guys. One of the guys hit on Kurt when they were out of sight from Adam and Sebastian nearly took his head off but held back as Kurt rolled his eyes and pushed the arm off his shoulders. Sebastian didn't hear what Kurt said but the other guy was suitably chastened and retreated with his tail between his legs. He gave Kurt a wide-berth the rest of the night.

The next day after the show, Adam met up with them for 'tea'. It had been a frosty night with Kurt sleeping in Santana's bed. Sebastian wasn't even sure what the fight was about anymore or how to come back from it. None of them looked well-rested and Adam buttered his roll as he chatted at them and Kurt mustered up some appropriate responses.

Adam suddenly laughed as he looked at all of them. "Yikes, you lot are suffering severely from jetlag. You look worse than a night out partying and since I saw you home, I know you weren't, unless you went out after." No, but that would have been preferable.

"You'll be back on your own soil soon and timezone." Sebastian wanted to protest, he'd gone back and forth several times before. Except he usually had a more agreeable flight time on a better plane and in better seats. He also didn't usually have a fight with a grumpy Kurt or have an irritable Santana tagging along.

This whole thing would have been resolved last night had she not played into it or copped to Kurt's requests. She was such a sucker for him and took his side in nearly everything. She didn't need to protect him from Sebastian! She definitely shouldn't have let him sleep in her bed last night. Santana and Sebastian had never shared a bed before.

The only highlight of this whole sordid mess, Kurt and Adam while playfully affectionate, it was all in good fun and as friends. The term 'love' was tossed about freely by Adam, as he attached it onto Santana too and looked ready to say it to Sebastian but refrained and called him 'mate' instead. He also called Santana 'pet' like his mother had with Kurt. It was a slow realization but once he did, he realized it was just a general term of endearment and nothing overly specific. He really should have known better but perhaps being in America for so long had dulled his memory. It was more like the Southern USA's terms of 'dear' or 'sweetie' or 'honey' or the like, even with strangers.

Any indicator of being in a relationship they might have had in the past was stripped away. There were a few looks from Adam toward Kurt but Kurt was oblivious to them and didn't return it once. He looked upon Adam as a friend. Even while he and Sebastian were in a bad place on this trip, he didn't foster any type of feelings of the sort with Adam.

Kurt had a good read on himself, when he was in a relationship, those kinds of feelings just didn't exist for anyone except the one he was with.

That helped to soothe and ease some of Sebastian's worries and tension. His mood improved considerably and he even chatted with Adam a bit. Now that Adam was back on his own turf, maybe because he wasn't dating who Sebastian coveted, Sebastian's opinion of Adam improved. He found Adam somewhat interesting now and could appreciate his finer qualities. He still complimented Kurt almost too much but Kurt deserved that kind of praise so didn't fault him.

He respected Kurt's desire to protect Adam's feelings and so didn't do what he wanted, which he probably should have done in the theater. While it was dark, Adam still could have seen and it was wholly inappropriate, he got that now. He didn't attempt to touch Kurt now but he did try to include all of them when he talked. Slowly Santana started talking more and the ice around Kurt started chipping away. A smile even broke out along his lips at something Sebastian said and Adam didn't catch or get.

That was good, he could still make Kurt smile. He wondered if he could still make Kurt laugh. He hadn't been attempting the first, but was still glad that he achieved it. He tried a bit harder to see another smile crack that marble face. Until that moment, he only seemed to have smiles for Adam. Sebastian wouldn't read into that, he'd already reassured himself there was nothing there.

They caught another inconvenient flight back but Kurt had to be up and at work early Monday morning. Sebastian had enough of the economy class that Adam had booked and upgraded all of their seats. He put Kurt next to him and Santana in the row ahead. If Kurt pulled a switch, he'd be right in front of Sebastian and would be at his mercy. It would actually be to Kurt's benefit to stay next to him.

Santana took it as her due to have the upgraded seat and didn't even mention it other than to take the ticket from him and kiss him on the cheek. She would have done it herself anyway and sauntered to her seat ahead of them. Kurt was stuck with him and was glaring at Sebastian.

"Did you want to sit in economy on your own?" Sebastian tossed at him when that glare didn't move even a little even once they were seated in the lap of this plane's luxury. "Ugh, we're not flying commercial anymore." He said to Santana who was in the process of popping in her buds.

"No shit. This was the worst." Santana rolled her eyes. "If we do fly commercial again, there are far nicer airlines and a whole pick of better flights."

"For a lot more money." Kurt said through gritted teeth.

"Yeah, and?" She batted her lashes at him, not waiting for his response, finishing putting in her noise canceling buds and tuning him out. Sebastian was glad he sat behind her, he was pretty sure Kurt would have kneed her seat, hard.

"Just accept it." Sebastian tried to ease Kurt back into the seat. "It's who we are and what you signed up for when you agreed to be friends with first Santana and then doubled down with being my friend. Dating me, you're stuck with us permanently."

"Am I?" Kurt asked perhaps a bit too sharply for what he intended, or Sebastian read more into that tone than Kurt meant. Sebastian reared back with surprise. Kurt thought better of his tone and modified it. "I mean, you didn't seem too keen on being tied down."

"Are you serious?" Sebastian snapped. "I would have been all over you all trip if it hadn't been for your self-imposed isolation."

"I didn't want Adam to know that we got together so soon after he and I broke up. I still feel incredibly guilty that I broke the last time I came back from England and even talked to you about having feelings."

"You didn't do anything wrong, you never put one toe out of place. Yeah, maybe that conversation shouldn't have happened but I'm for one really glad. I don't know what I would have done for those 7 months, probably try to find another guy to date after my first two failed attempts then give up altogether, going back to my old ways."

"You did though." Kurt pointed out.

"I wasn't a monk, no." Sebastian agreed. "But I wouldn't have thought to give it a fourth try with you once you were single. I definitely would have thought that it was a fluke if you told me after you broke up with Adam. We certainly wouldn't be here now. I would have thought I was just a convenient rebound."

"How on earth do you survive the nights that I'm not in your bed?" Kurt asked with an exaggerated snark.

"Fuck, Kurt." Sebastian hissed below anyone else's hearing. "Do you think that I'm out those nights that we're not together getting it on with strangers in the dark?"

Kurt was silent, his arms crossed over his chest and staring moodily at the seat in front of him. Thankfully it was empty or the person who would have been sitting there would have a killer headache.

"Dammit, no. I waited forever for you and I wouldn't screw it up by finding a cheap thrill in the nights between having you. I am not a monk but I'm also not a cheater, nor do I encourage cheating. I have some ability to abstain too." Sebastian was furious now in turn. "If you have such a low opinion of me, ok, I get it, but you know Santana would tell you." When Kurt's eyes snapped to him, unmoved, Sebastian insisted. "She would. She loves you more than I think she loves me."

There was a quiver in Kurt's bottom lip and Sebastian groaned and unbuckled Kurt and pulled him from his seat, pulling him onto his lap. "Don't cry. Please don't cry." He pulled Kurt's head to his shoulder and buried his face into Kurt's neck. "I'm sorry this weekend has been such a shit-show. I don't know where things went wrong."

He felt Kurt's hands lift his face and made room for them to look at each other. Despite what Sebastian heartily requested, there were still tears in Kurt's eyes. "I'm sorry." Kurt rasped. "I know you have integrity and that you wouldn't cheat. I don't know what happened this weekend either. We were in such a good place before we came here."

"We were confronted with having our relationship questioned." Sebastian didn't know where he'd become so enlightened all of a sudden. "We've only had Santana's unwavering support."

Kurt's lips trembled a bit but he didn't look on the verge of crying anymore. "I didn't like seeing you flirt with those other guys. I know it's your personality but it felt wrong and we were so far apart, not just physically but in all ways."

"I promise to only flirt with other guys when my arm is wrapped around you." Sebastian said solemnly and Kurt laughed and Sebastian swooped in to kiss those lips. That was the way they should be, not drawn into a straight line or downward. Sebastian rested his forehead against Kurt's. "Don't run again, please? If we have the ability to sleep in the same bed, then stay in it with me."

"I'm in it with you. I shouldn't have slept apart, I was just so angry and unsure and there's things that I haven't told you about my past and I think I just needed this one time to sort myself out. I hated that you were so close and I wasn't in your arms."

"Santana wouldn't let me come in and join the two of you or drag you back to our bed." Sebastian explained. "I'd like to hear about those things, if you want to tell me."

"I do, but not here and now." Kurt implored and Sebastian wouldn't press, he had a feeling there was more for awhile now. He would wait for Kurt to feel comfortable sharing.

"Ok, but don't take this question the wrong way. Any jealousy I feel toward Adam is long in the past." He held Kurt's eyes before he continued, making sure he understand where this was coming from. Kurt gave a small nod to go on. "Does Adam know?"

Kurt's lips turned down a bit and this time he didn't look away as he took a deep breath. "Yes."

Sebastian nodded, it just confirmed what he'd suspected and he spoke slowly when he asked the next question. "Is that why he's always been so gentle with you?"

Kurt laughed and shook his head. "That's just Adam. I've never met a gentler soul." Sebastian supposed that was true but Kurt had missed Adam catching the nuances with Blaine and disliking it. Adam had a backbone, he was just extra good to Kurt.

Sebastian let it drop there though. "You know... the bathrooms in first class are so much nicer than ones in economy."

"No." Kurt wiggled to get off of Sebastian's lap and back to his seat.

"Don't want join an even more elite club?" Sebastian didn't let him move and internally winced because he'd left himself wide open for a very vicious jab.

Kurt tossed his head back and laughed. "The mile high club membership can be achieved in Denver." Sebastian was glad that he didn't take the cheaper shot, Sebastian might have.

Santana took it as she turned in her seat, obviously not as oblivious to their conversation as she'd pretended with her headphones. "And the membership to your body isn't that elite or exclusive."

Sebastian took Kurt with him as he leaned forward to glare at his best friend. "Hold you tongue, Satan! I am very discerning and it's a closed chapter, no more memberships will be given out."

Kurt nodded, sliding a possessive hand down Sebastian's chest as he spoke to Santana. "And all memberships but one have been revoked. They might have gotten tickets to ride at one point but the ride now is a private event with a single patron."

"Worst ride, ever." Santana rolled her eyes though Sebastian was shocked at Kurt's puns.

"Shut it, you never got to ride it. Even before it was sold to new ownership, you wouldn't have passed the bouncer."

"Bouncers have never told me no."

"Management would have caught you and kicked you out." Sebastian returned instantly and glanced to Kurt. "You'd always have been given the velvet rope section."

"I'm ok with clearing the club out and putting up the costs to keep it open for business with only us there."

"Oh, ick." Santana rolled her eyes and turned back around and plugging in to her music again.

"Are you sure you don't want to revisit the bathroom thing? It's not very often you get to have sex while flying above the Atlantic Ocean. You've been holding back on the sexy talk."

"That wasn't that sexy." Kurt a dull pink covered his skin and Sebastian groaned. He'd chased that flush before with his mouth and he was never fast enough to stay with it.

"Maybe not overt dirty talk but it was sexy in its own way." Sebastian confessed. "Really turned me on."

A throat cleared and both their heads turned toward whoever was interrupting them. "Please return to your seat, Mr. Hummel. The flight is getting ready for takeoff."

"Oh, uh, yeah, ok." Kurt slipped off of Sebastian's lap and quickly did up his seatbelt. Sebastian uncomfortably crossed his legs to try and hide his problem from the flight attendant's eyes. No point in giving away what Sebastian had planned for later. When the attendant was out of hearing distance, Kurt turned his head to Sebastian and a slow, sexy as hell smile crossed his lips. It was also pure torture when combined with what Kurt said next. "Yeah ok, let's do it."

He honestly didn't think Kurt would have taken him up on it. Just the fact that he agreed had Sebastian incredibly excited. Kurt didn't even need to follow through with it, he'd already supplied Sebastian with a million daydreams. He was definitely not going to let Kurt know that though, he was still hopeful that it would actually be followed through with.

–

Rachel nearly bit Sebastian's head off when they told her that he and Kurt were dating. Blaine got into Kurt's face and started shouting at him about leading him on. Rachel screeched at Sebastian but he ignored her, striding across the room to put himself in between Blaine and Kurt. He wasn't even sure how they'd gotten separated in the first place, but all of a sudden they were and now Sebastian was remedying that.

Blaine snarled at him and basically frothed at the mouth but somehow held himself back and instead just started ranting, raving and pacing the room. Somehow, Sebastian could see Blaine throwing things any minute but he didn't.

Sebastian firmed his stance, feet wide, ready for Blaine to come at him. His arms were in front of him but not crossed, not letting them get caught if they needed to move fast to catch Blaine but they stayed in front, to protect any vulnerable areas. Kurt wrapped a reassuring arm around his waist and Sebastian tensed for all of a second before relaxing into Kurt's hold.

Blaine, if possible, just got angrier at their embrace. He opened his mouth to say something but Sebastian snapped out first. "Rachel, call back your dog."

Rachel screeched but it was enough to pull Blaine out of his completely unacceptable behavior. He realized he was losing face. He straightened up and looked over to Kurt. "I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me. Of course you're allowed to date whomever you'd like and well within your rights to not return my feelings." Suave, cool and collected now, huh? Sebastian frowned at Blaine's about-face. Sebastian's frown deepened as Kurt accepted the apology graciously.

After the trip to England, it was too hard to hide it from anyone and so they decided to come clean with their friends that following week. This was the worst of the reactions. Most were cool with it, a few laughed and wished them luck, only some were joking.

They probably shouldn't have told the two of them together but if they told them separately the other would have known near instantly anyway.

"I knew you were having sex with someone but I didn't think it was him. He's a disgusting s-." Kurt had basically transported himself from Sebastian's side to in front of Rachel with how fast he moved. The rest of her words were mumbled behind Kurt's hand.

"Don't you dare use those kinds of words about him. I don't care if I'm in the room or not, those kinds of words are off limit. You should know better than to shame someone."

"Brody a least got paid for it." Blaine grumbled.

Kurt spun on Blaine, Rachel seemed to be getting it finally. "Don't talk about him either! You don't know the whole story and he deserves better than the way he was cut out of our lives. I would have still been his friend but it was too painful to have me so connected to all of you."

"I forgot." Blaine gave Kurt attitude. "You are related to a porn star, of course you don't mind if someone sells their body."

"He was a stripper and that company has been raided and shut down for illegally hiring underaged boys. He should have never had to do that in the first place much less allowed to. You're just digging yourself a deep grave, Blaine, keep it up and I will actively insure we aren't friends and you are dis-invited to all activities that include me." He was furious now and Sebastian had no idea which of the guys Kurt was talking about. Well, actually, he could rule one out. Finn seemed awkward and ashamed of his body but the other two had so much confidence in their appearances.

Blaine's jaw dropped, not expecting it from Kurt. Did these two think Kurt was such a pushover? Kurt chose his battles but if it was something he cared about, he fought for it tooth and nail. Sebastian had been able to see that early on. "I-I-" That was a fate that Blaine hadn't expected to be possible. He would now at least pretend to be contrite.

Kurt was done listening, Blaine would have to think of a way to properly apologize at a later date. Kurt was in Rachel's face once more. "You should be ashamed of yourself!" He put her in his place. "How could you share that with anyone? You should be so mad at Blaine right now for using that against him. He was a child and trying to support his family in whatever way he could. He was doing a very honorable thing that should never have been placed on his shoulders. He should be celebrated for all he did, not mocked or belittled! Is this what you do? You appear to be a friend to people and then stab them in the back to use their life's hardships as a dinner joke?"

"Kurt!" Rachel bellowed. "You're my best friend! You should know I would nev-."

"You did." Kurt cut her off. "No matter what you say you wouldn't do, you can't deny that you already did it!"

"It's just Blaine, he and I share everything." Rachel continued to try and defend herself, to prove to all of them that she couldn't have been in the wrong though Kurt was giving her some hard truths finally. "I didn't tell it to him to hurt or make fun of anyone else. I just shared part of my life with him."

"Perhaps you should have asked for permission to share before you did." Kurt huffed. "Though we both know he wouldn't have cared and probably would have told the stories himself if someone asked. He's not ashamed because it wasn't anything shameful." He tossed over his shoulder at Blaine.

Sebastian hadn't gone into this with this motive in mind. He just wanted to share their news. This was just an extra bonus. Kurt was really worked up and while that was all good and Sebastian hoped that it meant the writing was on the wall for their friendships, he worried about the whiplash after all was said and done. Kurt still lived here and he would have to come back to at least move his stuff out. Hopefully it would all be in once piece if Rachel and Blaine got too angry after being put into their places.

Also, Sebastian knew that's not what Kurt actually wanted. He feared losing his friendships, with Rachel especially. Kurt would be really upset about this being the way things ended. He reached out and ran gentle fingers along the small of Kurt's back, letting his palm splay and rest comforting and warm. Kurt looked ready to snap at him but then the muscles relaxed beneath his fingers and Kurt looked at the two of them each in turn. "Think about what you did. I'll be back Sunday night." He disappeared into his room to pack a bag.

"Kurt!" Rachel called out, fear in her voice and Sebastian watched as she and Blaine shared a look, each were upset over the prospect of Kurt leaving now and ending what they'd already shared for so long.

That, Sebastian could understand. Losing Kurt as a friend would be a terrible blow for any of them.

Rachel was babbling and Sebastian didn't catch anything she was saying as Blaine was also talking quickly and he sometimes stumbled over words whenever he was emotion. Their words just blended together creating too much noise and not enough substance.

Kurt re-emerged from his room, his fingers tightened around the strap of his bag as it laid crossed over his chest. His lips pressed together and his jaw firmed and he looked at the two for a long while before he spoke. "Figure yourselves out."

It was a bold move, especially because it was so at odds with what he really wanted, what he feared would happen. Yet, he couldn't be the one bending to them all the time, making compromises. Sebastian was proud of him and didn't have to add anything.

Later, when they got out of Sebastian's car and were in the apartment for awhile, having something to drink and eat and chatting about other things, ensuring that Santana wasn't around. It was then that Sebastian broached the prickly topic.

"Are you ready to tell me about Brody?" He had a feeling a lot of things started with him.

Kurt sighed and put down his cup, he had been staring into it for a good minute before Sebastian asked, reflecting on the day's events anyway. He wrapped his throw around him a little more securely. "I kind of liked you not knowing, not having a shadow over what we do."

"Except it's still there for you and because it's there for you, I know it's there too, so essentially I'm also aware of it, I just don't know what it is."

Kurt nodded, agreeing with everything Sebastian was saying. "I know and if we're going to make this relationship work then I should be open and honest about everything. Romantic relationships don't have deep dark secrets."

"Is- is that what this is?" Sebastian stumbled a little over his words, anxiety gripping his stomach but anxiety that Kurt had been hurt, nothing more. Kurt had always been a little on the innocent side, he'd thought. At one time, he'd thought Kurt was one of the only or last of those who still believed in monogamy and true love and real marriage. Then he learned through Kurt there were others like that out there but Sebastian only wanted to really try that with Kurt, or at least parts of that, for now at least.

Kurt's silence was too long for Sebastian. Then he shook his head. "No, and that's because of Brody." He shifted and settled in to tell his story but in the end it was too short, not enough for Sebastian and too much too. "I was with Rachel at the mall a couple of years ago, she'd convinced me to try out for a role and I hadn't realized she meant as a Christmas elf. There were a few things that happened that led up to me meeting a guy named Cody. He was suave and charming and hot, oh he was so delicious. He was a mall Santa too, or that's what he said. I don't know if that was another lie. Well, we had a bit of a private party, Rachel, Cody and I."

"You didn't." Sebastian wasn't sure he could look at Kurt the same way ever again if he admitted to having a three-some with Rachel.

"Ew, no, she's my bestie but not like that." Kurt shuddered. "Gross. Anyway, when she realized Cody was more interested in me than her, she called up Brody for a booty call. This was before they'd gotten together for any length of time or commitment." Kurt paused, picked up his drink again and took a strong pull from it, gathering himself for what more he had to say. "Well... Brody heard some noises in the middle of the night and went to go investigate. He walked right by the living room without noticing anything amiss. He decided that it was just something outside and while he was up, he might as well get something to eat or drink. It was then that he walked by my room and heard me. No, it isn't one of those stories but nearly could have been. It had definitely scarred me enough as it was to make me change a few habits, created a few triggers."

Kurt left it at that for a moment and Sebastian didn't know if he could press. They were dating, but they hadn't been dating for that long and they certainly hadn't gotten to boyfriend status yet. Though they were friends and had been for awhile and they were being honest and open with each other. "What did he do?"

Kurt swallowed hard and Sebastian almost retracted his question if it affected Kurt so much. "He tied me up and did a little touching that I was no longer consenting to. It would have been much more if it weren't for Brody." Kurt fidgeted, stretching and moving and having a hard time looking Sebastian in the eye, much less looking at him at all. Sebastian took a risk and moved in, pulling Kurt into a hug, loose enough to break free of but strong enough to let him know that he had him if he wanted to sink in."As it was, Brody kicked him out, not realizing that Cody had moved all our Christmas stuff into the hallway for an easy getaway. I was just a bonus treat to his evil Grinch plans except there was no heart enlarging moment afterward where he returned things, apologized and we all sang together." Kurt shrugged a little in Sebastian's embrace. "Though Brody and I got a bit closer after that. We never spoke of it again and he respected that I needed a bit of space after something like that but we knew we respected and cared about each other."

"Did Rachel know?"

"She was sound asleep when everything went down and we agreed not to wake her and tell her. I did eventually tell her the cliffnotes version of what happened and so she knew but she doesn't really know, you know?"

"Does Santana know?" Sebastian would have some serious words with her about what she did if she knew. Kurt should have had someone in his corner that didn't want to pressure him into more but still knew.

"Maybe, what with her third eye and all that." Kurt gave a small shrug. "Though I doubt she knows the specifics or Brody's role in all of this."

"So then who all knows?" Sebastian ran a comforting hand against Kurt's back, glad that he hadn't pulled away or shunned the support.

"In addition to those we've talked about? Just Adam." Kurt took a shuddering breath. "Maybe that's why we were always so PG or maybe it's just who Adam is but I basically told him the first time he asked me out that I wasn't at a place for a boyfriend. He became my friend first and was there for me. I told him pretty quickly about what happened and then suddenly we were boyfriends and it's not a joke when I say that my relationship with him was very much always under a sheet. I didn't think I had it in me to be so bold again but you pulled it out of me. Will it break us if I never-."

"Never what? Submit to being under me? I already told you, I like that you know what you want or don't want and are vocal about it." Sebastian wouldn't let him just change the topic. He'd asked about the relationship with Adam before, asked about the sex and Kurt had always danced around it. Now he was a little surprised Kurt shared as much as he did but still said so annoyingly little. It was more to reassure Sebastian and explain where he was coming from than anything else. "Why didn't you fight to keep Brody as a friend?"

"I don't know what happened there. Rachel and Brody were getting close, there was a bit of a mishap and then they were fine again but Rachel was a bit more cautious. Then all of a sudden Rachel's in tears saying Brody broke up with her via text and refused to see her again. He gave her some kind of excuse when we cornered him but wouldn't add anything to it or tell me anything. He's blocked my texts and basically disappeared. He's graduated and left the state. I don't know what else I could do. Now I know he was having sex for money but I don't know how that was discovered."

"You still want to be friends with him?" Sebastian wondered, already thinking of ways to rekindle that friendship.

"I'd like to be able to stay in touch with him." Kurt snuggled in. "You're nice and warm and comfortable."

"Does Blaine know?"

"I would have said no but after it was reveled that he knows about Sam, maybe. I certainly wasn't the one who told him about what happened to me." Kurt grumbled and it was adorable, Sebastian wanted to reach out and stroke his hair but had to be careful about when he chose to do so.

"Why haven't you told your family?" Sebastian asked, shifting a little so Kurt could be even more comfortable.

"Are you nuts? You've met them."

"Yeah and they all seem like big teddy-bears."

"You obviously weren't paying attention then." Kurt sighed, his cheek pressed against Sebastian's heart. "Maybe they would have gone the legal routes but I didn't want to be dragged through all that. It's the same old story, one person's word against another. It doesn't help that I started out consenting. There's a lot more that can be argued then."

"Yeah but he stole stuff." Sebastian was relaxing despite the conversation with Kurt's weight on him like this.

Kurt yawned and wrapped a blanket more around them. "Rachel reported the theft since that was more clear cut. Nothing's been done about it."

"Hmm..." Sebastian's chest vibrated with the sound that he made with it. Kurt soothed it with calming circles and a press of his lips against Sebastian's throat. "Nothing happened."

"That's not true and you're scarred now by it."

"I make adjustments, everyone does when they've had an unpleasant experience. I'm really ok." Kurt pressed another kiss to Sebastian's neck and then trailed a few more up the side of his throat. "Just forget about it, I mainly have, except when it gets brought up like today."

Sebastian sighed, knowing he'd probably never forget about it but also knowing he'd known people who'd gone through worse. Kurt had been lucky in that sense, had someone who helped him out. Kurt would never have need to be put in that position again. He'd learned from it and Sebastian would make sure that it was never foisted onto him either.

He was sure there was probably more to the situation but he'd respect Kurt's wishes and let it drop. He would make sure he'd be ok with what he knew and not expect anything further on it. He would not push or ask more questions.

–

The most difficult moment Sebastian had for not speaking out was actually one of the most important.

It was Thanksgiving again and as per the new tradition, Kurt's family was coming to New York to spend it with him. It was at the apartment that he shared with Rachel in the, admittedly, not worst area of town. They just had to be careful when they went to different places in the area but it was, as Kurt had insisted, relatively safe. Sebastian had come around to that way of thinking with the few times he's spent over there. It was difficult when Rachel was around and just gave him an icy glare.

He would prefer to spend whatever time he had with Kurt in his own apartment as Santana was often gone but with her glare, it challenged him in a different way. He wouldn't let her scare him away and he'd rub it in her face too. She wouldn't win.

Her retaliation was to bring Blaine over more.

As per usual, he and Santana were helping Kurt in the kitchen when Blaine came in to 'help'. He dropped the box of beer that Burt typically drank and the glass just shattered as it landed, beer seeping out from the cardboard box.

"I'm so sorry!" Blaine had already drank more than he usually did and was slurring and stumbling over words.

Kurt just sighed and held up a hand to stop anyone from moving. He went to the coffee still percolating and shoved a freshly brewed cup into Blaine's hands. "Go sober up some, you can't be this sloshed before dinner." His hands went to Blaine's shoulders, turned him around and ushered him out. "Rachel, you're on Blaine duty!" Sebastian was glad he didn't give anyone else that task.

Kurt sighed again and looked at the mess on the floor and then the clock on the wall. "Hey, what do you need?" Sebastian asked, wrapping his arms around Kurt and hoping to lend him a bit of support.

"Do you mind- going to the shop and getting a replacement?" Kurt tipped his head back and looked up at him hopefully. Sebastian dropped a kiss onto Kurt's forehead, ignoring how it felt oddly reminiscent of Adam's job last year. It was just what the boyfriend was there to do.

The difference was that they'd planned for Blaine messing up the order and so had gotten everything ahead of time this time to avoid going out on this day. Of course Blaine messed it up again somehow.

"I'll go with you." Santana volunteered.

Sebastian shook his head at her. "You need to stay here and help him out." He left it unsaid – since no one else was.

Santana settled and nodded, hearing what he wasn't saying. It was going to be a lot smaller of a party this year. Rachel's dads weren't coming, Elliott and Dani weren't coming. Adam wouldn't be here. As far as Sebastian knew, the five were coming up from Ohio but that could have changed too.

Thankfully, there were six of them that came up from Ohio this time, creating an even number for dinner and the sixth was cute. She was Puck's little sister, Sarah. It still took him a moment to get there though as when he came back in, the Hummel-clan was already there. It had taken him longer than expected as the first several shops had said they were going to be open but weren't. He had to go pretty far away to find the beer.

Kurt was in the room, wiping his hands off on his towel and stuffing it into his apron, so it wouldn't have been long they were here. He was all smiles and greeted his family tenderly. Sebastian slipped around to drop the beer off in the fridge so he'd have free hands too. Even Kurt had missed Sebastian slipping by.

Sebastian came back out to see Kurt giving his dad a hug and turning to give the others a hug as well. "I heard you have a new boyfriend." Sarah said somewhat loudly, had to be to be heard over the mainly male group she was with. Carole smirked a little.

"Yeah, all you said was that it was someone I'd already met." Burt looked around the room and spotted Blaine standing across the room with Rachel. "Blaine!" Burt greeted with warmth and energy, striding forward to reach him.

"Mr. Hummel." Blaine greeted back a little bashfully and reached out to shake his hand. Burt bypassed it and pulled him into a hug.

"Welcome into the family." Burt's voice carried over all of them and Kurt started forward, still not knowing Sebastian was back.

"No, dad, not- not Blaine." He tried not to make the denial offensive. "Sebastian. He'll be back soon, he's running an errand for me and -."

Sebastian slipped behind the Hummel-clan again and stepped out into the hallway, knowing the only way to soothe this over was to pretend that he hadn't witnessed Burt's obvious preference. He didn't have his coat, shoes or anything with him, but he hoped that no one would notice that. It hurt, but he could understand it. Blaine had always done really well with parents, no matter the situation.

He pushed open the door, whistling and stopped dead before grinning widely. "Hummels! You beat me back. I wanted to be here to welcome you in."

The Hummel-clan descended on him and hugged him hello. He had gotten on with the rest of them at least, even if his personality could be a bit abrasive at times. They still treated Rachel with respect and even cherished her in a way he could never see doing.

It was after everyone had their chance to hug him and Burt had shaken his hand, the lack of welcome to the family clean between them. Burt couldn't have known, could he? Was he embarrassed and so hadn't wanted to repeat what he'd already said? Or was it because he didn't welcome Sebastian to the family?

Of course, Santana and Kurt noticed that his cover was just that. It was later, when Kurt had his arms wrapped around Sebastian from behind, his chin resting on Sebastian shoulder as they watched the others look through the possible games prior to dinner that Kurt acknowledged it. He pressed a kiss to Sebastian's neck before returning to his position. "Thank you and I'm sorry. He'll come around. He has to adjust his thoughts."

"He prefers Blaine." Sebastian said softly and Kurt tightened his arms around Sebastian.

"I don't." Kurt said feverishly and Sebastian knew that logically but it felt good hearing it. "They don't either." He nodded toward his huge football playing 'brothers' who were huddled together discussing something and then would look up at them occasionally and grin before whispering together again.

"They look like they're planning something." Sebastian was cautious when it came to them, they didn't look like they were up to anything good and he'd probably be the one to suffer because of it.

"When they like you, they're harmless." Kurt reassured and slid his arms more firmly around Sebastian's torso, watching the rest of them in companionable silence. Sebastian hoped that was all it was, but the rest of the evening would show the truth.

–

EAN: There are things that will be clearer in the future. Bum-bum-bum... :D You probably don't even notice it yet, lol. I just know what's coming, which I'm sure you're glad about, because someone has to know what's upcoming, and it probably should be the writer. ;)