AN: This is set between S3E06 and S3E07. As for crossover characters; if I've done my homework correctly it's Chicago Fire season 6 and Chicago PD season 5 that airs when Chicago Med is in season 3. Just a warning – I know nothing about patient care, or the medical profession in general. So, if you are a professional reading this, please accept my apologies in advance. Here we go.

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Chicago Med

The Road to Hell is Paved with Good Intentions

1

Broken Heart

Connor Rhodes stepped into the elevator and stifled a yawn with the palm of his hand. He closed his eyes and slid his palm to his forehead, gently massaging the area, in an effort to ease his headache. Not that he expected it to help in any way but it gave temporary relief until he could get his hands on the pills in his locker.

The surgeon had worked way over the limit of his sixteen-hour double shift by now and Latham had practically shoed him out. The first seven hours of his shift had been spent over the open chest cavity of an elderly man in severe need of a complicated heart valve replacement. It had been a scheduled operation for once; one of the few high-profile cases they'd had lately since the death of their own 'rockstar' Doctor Downey. Upbeat from the praise he'd been receiving for his excellent handiwork, he'd thrown himself into more work and things had gone from good to bad and then from bad to worse.

Connor chuckled to himself bitterly in his sleep-deprived state. If someone had told him that he would abandon his offered position as trauma attending after his finished fellowship and begin another fellowship at the cardiothoracic department, he would have dismissed that person as delusional. But then again, maybe he shouldn't have been surprised at all?

A lot of things had happened during his time at Gaffney Chicago Medical Center; some bad and some good. For example, on his first day, he'd taken the commuter train to avoid speculations about his background. Gliding up at the entrance with his new BMW SUV would have turned a few heads. However, while his reasoning might have been sound, it didn't exactly turn out the way he'd planned. Instead of arriving quietly and figure out his place at the hospital, he'd barged in, sitting on top of a gurney bent over a badly injured patient, doing chest compressions.

Instead of introducing himself properly to his new colleagues, he'd ticked off one of the residents – Will Halstead – while refusing to let go of his newfound patient. Now, in his defense, he had every right to do so because, like he'd explained to the ginger head; he was the new trauma fellow and Doctor Halstead was just an emergency resident.

Luckily, he hadn't alienated everyone on his first day. He'd found the fourth-year medical student Sarah Reese to be an excellent health care provider even though she insisted that she detested being placed on an ED rotation. She was perhaps a bit insecure and perplexed at times, but who hadn't been while being a student?

Nathalie Manning was an emergency resident whom he'd come to like and respect as a colleague even though they had had their share of disagreements. Nathalie was a good doctor and very considerate and caring when it came to her patients.

Ethan Choi was another emergency resident he'd come to grow fond of and appreciate as a friend. The Korean was a veteran, a former medic in the navy. He was used to battlefield zones and emergencies far beyond the comfort of the emergency department at Gaffney. He was a straightforward kind of guy, a no-nonsense doctor, yet he was humble and gracious. Although Connor realized that what Choi had experienced on the field was far more gross than any of the things he'd endured while in Riyadh, they could still bond over a few things.

Both Natalie and Ethan had moved on to attending positions now and Sarah Reese was currently doing a residency at the Department of Psychiatry.

He also felt like he'd bonded with some nurses. Especially Maggie and April down in the ER and Beth and Rose up on the surgical floor. He considered all of them to be great coworkers. Unlike many of his fellow doctors he considered them valuable members of his team, not some subordinate robots who didn't have a care in the world or a will of their own. Perhaps that was due to his upbringing? The way he'd seen his father manipulate everyone around him to get what he wanted; the tendency he had to treat everyone around him as servants. Connor despised that and he despised his father. He blamed him for everything bad that had happened when he was a little boy, especially for the traumatic experience close to his tenth birthday when his beloved mother had stepped off the sun roof and plunged to her death.

He would never be able to forget his mother's suicide. It drove a wedge between him and his father. After years of processing and still not being able to move on, he began to spiral out of control. Ironically, it was only his father's connections that had prevented him from ending up in jail. It was another low blow to a young man with low self-esteem who didn't feel like he belonged anywhere in the world. It was another testament to the power of money and wealth. It was proof that the whole justice system was corrupt and broken.

After getting his wits together and graduating school he was coerced into working at the family company – something he had only even considered because of his sister – but he couldn't stand it. He didn't like the ruthlessness of businessmen and the opportunities a thick wallet could present.

He decided to be something, someone, who could make a difference in the world. That's when he took his belongings and left the country to pursue a career in medicine. He went to Guadalajara, where no one knew the name Rhodes, and worked hard to prove himself. From there destiny took him to Riyadh and then all the way back to Chicago.

Connor had never regretted going into medicine nor had he regretted becoming a certified trauma surgeon and CT fellow. However, there had been times when he'd wished life in general wasn't so complicated and there had been moments when he had questioned his sanity when he decided to move back home.

Doctor Rhodes watched as coworkers filed out of the elevator before him and sighed. He broke out of his reverie and stepped onto the ED floor, heading for his locker in the doctors' lounge. A rare moment of peace seemed to have fallen over the emergency department and he watched as the wall-mouthed clock turned four after midnight.

Connor was tired and not in a good mood as he opened his locker and popped two Tylenol into his mouth. He'd started his shift being on top of his game and ended it hitting rock bottom. He hadn't seen it coming; the complications that followed from a quick decision during the latest surgery. He hadn't been able to correct the mistake quickly enough and lost his patient as a direct result. Ava was chastising him for it; blaming him. The next of kin had threatened to sue him for malpractice. Also, he had seen the split-second disappointment in Doctor Latham's eyes before he'd stepped in to redeem the situation. That disappointment had hurt him more than he cared to admit.

Rhodes had lost so many things in his life and no matter what he did, he didn't seem to be able to save those who meant the most to him. He'd never truly gotten over the death of his mother and he'd lost friends in Riyad; friends that meant a lot to him, friends that hurt too much to speak about, even now, several years later. During a moment of weakness in the middle east, when grief had threatened to overcome him, he had decided to run again. Running away from his problems was something that he'd mastered to perfection after all these years. Only this time, instead of running further away, he went back to the place where it had all started. He returned home.

Connor wondered bitterly, as he reached for his coat, whom he'd been trying to fool. How long he'd been hoping to avoid his past? It surely didn't take long for his father to try and nestle his way back into his life again, trying to manipulate him. Unfortunately for Rhodes's senior, he was stronger now, older and experienced. He'd made a reputation for himself. He was still a Rhodes, there was nothing he could do about that, but he tried to be himself and be guided by his own moral compass. His upbringing – even though it left a lot to be desired – did come with benefits when he needed them and he knew that it irked some of his fellow colleagues.

Right now, however, he couldn't care less as he buttoned up his coat, closed the locker and got out. It was late, too late in fact, to actually even go to bed before his next scheduled shift at 8 am. Day and night had seemed to blur into one horrible long stretch of agony of late, especially since left him with a handwritten note thirty-six hours ago.

He snorted bitterly as he reached the parking lot and his BMW. Thirty-six hours. That's how long he'd been driving himself crazy over Robin's betrayal. She didn't answer his texts or his calls. It was as if she'd vanished into thin air and never existed, like the last year hadn't existed, and it hurt him more than he cared to admit. Maybe he had never experienced real love before he'd met Robin because it sure as hell hadn't felt like this when Zanetti left him, nor any girlfriend before that for that matter. He was emotionally distraught and irritated as he got into the car and fired up the engine. He cranked the wheel and headed off with shrieking tires.

He rolled out on one of the main streets, wondering why he should go home to an empty apartment where everything just reminded him of Robin and how much he had lost. Deep in thought, sleep-deprived and miserable he drove through the city in silence with his ire directed at Doctor Charles as he blamed him for Robin's sudden departure. However, deep down, Connor knew it was irrational to blame the psychiatrist. Daniel had insisted he didn't have anything to do with her departure and claimed he had nothing against his daughter's relationship with Connor but it hurt too much to believe Robin had made the decision all by herself. He loved Robin and he loved-

He was brutally forced out of his reminiscing and painful thoughts as all hell broke loose at the intersection within seconds. Connor slammed on the brakes but it was too late.

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To be continued