WHAT IF? - SEASON 3 EPISODE 15 - YOUR OWN WORST ENEMY
Disclaimer: I don´t own Degrassi or the characters from it.
I´LL TRY NOT TO DO ONE OF THESE BEFORE EVERY EPISODE, BUT I WANTED TO FEATURE JANE´S GRADE (THE JUNIORS) IN THIS ONE, BECAUSE THEY´VE BEEN VERY UNDERUSED THIS SEASON. IT´S ALSO A NICE, LIGHT HEARTED EPISODE BEFORE THE MAIN STORIES GET KICKED INTO HIGH GEAR IN THE FINAL EPISODES. I HOPE THAT YOU´VE LIKED THE SERIES SO FAR AND WILL ENJOY THIS EPISODE TOO. IT´S NOT AN ORIGINAL IDEA TO DO THIS AS A THEME FOR AN EPISODE, BUT IT IS ONE OF THOSE "HIGH SCHOOL SHOW STABLES" THAT IT´S FUN TO PLAY AROUND WITH!
1. Int. Classroom. Day.
The Juniors are having math class with Coach Petrino as their teacher. The girls (in particular Chantay, who´s sitting next to Mia) look like they´re looking forward to what´s to come, while some of the boys (Danny especially) are fearing it.
Chantay (whispering to Mia):
I bet he´s gonna tell us now!
Mia (whispering to Chantay):
I´ve been waiting for this, since the school year began!
We cut over to their respective boyfriends Danny and Peter, who are less enthusiastic.
Danny (whispering to Peter):
What can she expect me to know about home economics? I have enough problems making my allowance last the entire week!
Peter (whispering to Danny):
Mia´s gonna dump me after this, I can feel it! I´ve practically had everything I want given to me, since I was born! It´s the one advantage to being an only child!
Danny (whispering to Peter):
Maybe we´ll get lucky and you´ll get Jane and I´ll get Darcy or something.
Peter (whispering to Danny):
Fat chance! I saw Chantay slip Petrino a twenty before class.
Danny (whispering to himself):
This is gonna be the worst!
Petrino comes down to them, making them stop talking.
Petrino:
If you two ladies are done with your tea party, can we get on with class?
Danny:
Sorry. We´re nervous because we know what´s coming.
Petrino:
So would I, if I were you!
He walks back up to his blackboard and picks up a piece of chalk. On it, he writes in large letters the words "Family Economics".
Petrino:
It´s a part of the curriculum for all Juniors, so if you didn´t know it was coming, you only have yourself to blame. You will be paired up two and two, boy and girl when possible and you will pretend that you are just married and it´s time for you to build family. What are the main things that you´ll need?
Many students raise their hands and he picks out Darcy.
Darcy:
Somewhere to live, like a house or an apartment?
Petrino writes "A place to live" on the blackboard.
Petrino:
That´s a good place to start. As much as I´m sure your parents love you, they also don´t want you living with them anymore, once you´ve tied the knot! I´ll be time for you to grow up, which for some of you would be a welcome change!
He looks down at Peter and Danny, just so there´s no doubt, who he´s talking about.
Petrino:
What else?
Peter:
Jobs?
Petrino:
While it would be nice, if you would raise your hand like everyone else, you would be right, mister Hatzilakos.
Peter smiles to himself on account of his small triumph.
Petrino:
You can make up any job titles you want for yourself, but you will have a combined income after taxes of 2500 dollars a month. While I know that may sound like a lot of money to many of you right now, you´ll find that it´s not a whole lot in reality. What else will you need?
Jane raises her hand and he points her out.
Jane:
Food would be nice, so we won´t have to starve to death!
She gets a small laugh from the rest of the students, but Petrino isn´t finding it as funny, as he writes "Food" on the board.
Petrino:
I want you to take this seriously, miss Vaughn. Do you think you would be capable of running the economy of a small family?
Jane:
I´m pretty sure, I could. I mean, it´s not like it´s rocket science!
Petrino smiles to himself.
Petrino:
We´ll see about that, won´t we? By the way, since there´s two more girls than boys in this class, you and miss Edwards will be doing this assignment together.
Jane and Darcy smile at each other and don´t look too unhappy with being teamed up for this.
Petrino:
I think you´ll find out, that it´s not as easy you think. Some of you may want to thank your parents for doing it for you, so you could concentrate on having fun, before all of this is over. Here are the other couples: Black and Van Zandt, Jones and Hatzilakos ...
He continues talking, but Danny and Peter have stopped listening and are now only concerned with how they´ll get out of this in the easiest way possible.
OPENING CREDITS
2. Int. Cafeteria. Day.
Mia has a sheet of paper in front of her and is holding a pencil. Peter, sitting across from her, tries to appear interested.
Mia:
What´s normal to pay in rent?
Peter:
How should I know?
Mia:
I can ask my mom.
Peter:
What it costs to live on skid row?
She looks at him angrily and he realizes that me messed up (again).
Peter:
I didn´t mean it like that ...
Mia:
How did you mean it? My dad walked out on us, when I was two months old and left her with nothing!
Peter:
I know. You´ve told me a thousand times.
Mia:
Everything considered, I´m proud to call her my mom! Like you should be proud of yours.
Peter rolls his eyes at her.
Peter:
The woman, who has forgotten what the word "Fun" means?
Mia:
Maybe you should try for once to take something seriously, in stead of goofing off with Danny and Derek, like you spend nearly all your time doing!
Peter:
Excuse me for wanting to enjoy my teenage years! You do know that we only get to be this age once, don´t you?
Mia:
Enjoying them is one thing. What you do is ... never mind!
Jane and Darcy come over to them, as they try to avoid eye contact with one another. Darcy and Jane pick up on what´s going on right away.
Darcy:
Is it me or did the temperature in here drop all of a sudden?
Jane:
Things not going well?
Mia:
He has no sense of responsibility!
Peter:
She wants us to start behaving like we´re 32 in stead of 16!
Darcy and Jane collectively wince, at what they just interrupted.
Jane:
If you need us, we´ll be over there, which is away from you!
Darcy:
I second that idea!
Jane and Darcy hurry away from them, as any sane person would in that situation!
3. Int. Hallway. Day.
Danny and Chantay are sitting on a bench. He´s trying to get his homework for the next class done in the nick on time, but she keeps interrupting him.
Chantay:
2500 isn´t a whole lot, but you could make it stretch, I suppose.
Danny:
A-huh?
Chantay:
Then again, we´ll also want to save up for when we start having kids. Have you seen how expensive baby clothes are?
Danny:
They´re expensive, alright.
Chantay:
And they grow out of them in no time! You should see how fast my cousin´s baby is growing! It´s crazy!
Danny:
Yeah, crazy.
She starts to realize that he´s not paying any attention and decides to test him.
Chantay:
It´s only gonna be seven months, until it´s our turn. I want you to be ready.
He continues writing for a few seconds, before stopping when he realizes what she just said. Putting the books way, he slowly starts to panic.
Danny:
You´re pregnant?
Chantay:
Would it be so terrible, if I was?
He practically jumps off the bench to put some distance between them.
Danny:
Yes it would! We´re 16, for Christ sake!
Chantay:
I´ll be 17 next month.
Danny:
Like that makes a difference! You have to get an abortion!
She stands up and moves towards him, as he continues backing up.
Chantay:
No, I don´t, because I´m not really pregnant!
He eases up a little, but is still apprehensive.
Danny:
You´re sure?
Chantay:
Trust me, there would be signs if I were! You can´t ever see yourself starting a family with me?
Danny can see that she´s feeling hurt and tries to comfort her, but she won´t let him.
Danny:
Chantay, you´re so much fun and I love doing all the things, we do together. But can you really see us lasting beyond high school?
Chantay looks him in the eyes and backs away from him, to his frustration.
Chantay:
The thing is, I could. I thought you were the one. I´ll tell Petrino, that we´re doing separate assignments.
Danny:
Can´t we talk about this?
Chantay:
You´ve said everything, that needed to be said.
She walks away from him and he tries to grasp that he´s just been dumped.
4. Int. The Dot. Day.
The one couple that everything is going well for so far (Jane and Darcy) are doing their planning over a shared portion of fries and a pair of sodas at the Dot. Darcy is writing and it looks to be going great.
Jane:
There´s an apartment opening up, in the building I live in with my mom.
Darcy:
How much is it?
Jane:
900 plus utilities.
Darcy:
What are utilities?
Jane:
You know, water, electricity, gas, et cetera.
Darcy:
I´m so glad, that I got partnered with you! You know so much more about this stuff, than I do.
Jane:
My mom makes a big deal out of teaching me to be independent. It´s not always interesting, but it is good to know these things.
Darcy:
You never know when an assignment like this is gonna come along!
Jane stops eating and looks at Darcy.
Jane:
You should know all of this too.
Darcy:
I´ve always figured that I would have a boyfriend or husband, who will take care of it.
Jane:
Maybe when you´re older and ready to settle down ...
Darcy stops writing and looks back at her.
Darcy:
How old do you think you should be, until you settle down?
Jane:
At least 30! Maybe not even then!
Darcy:
By that time, I´ll already have had my five kids.
Jane:
Five? Are you insane?
Darcy:
I want to have 3 girls and 2 boys and I want to have them, before I turn 30, so they´ll be off to college by the time I turn 50 and I can start enjoying my retirement years. What´s wrong with that?
Jane:
Nothing, I guess. It´s just way different from how I see my future. For one thing, I have to see the entire world first, before I can think of settling down!
Darcy:
We would make a terrible couple.
Jane:
We wouldn´t even make good room mates!
They nod in agreement.
5. Int. Peter´s Room. Evening.
Peter and Danny are moping over getting dumped by their girlfriends.
Peter:
It´s not like I meant to talk bad about her mom. She´s a nice woman. She just isn´t someone to look up to. Mia needs to strive for more.
Danny:
Can you see yourself living where she lives?
Peter shakes his head.
Peter:
If she can´t handle me being honest, then we´re never going to last.
Danny:
It´s not like all we do is goof off, either!
Peter:
We can be serious! There´s just no reason to!
Danny:
Exactly! I still can´t believe Chantay!
Peter:
Where does she get off, pulling a move like that on you? Of course you were gonna panic!
Danny:
Who wouldn´t in that situation?
Peter takes a moment to think about it.
Peter:
I don´t think I would, if it happened with Mia. As crazy as it sounds, I think I would be happy.
Danny eyes him in disbelief.
Danny:
For real? Even though you´re 16 and it would change your entire lives completely?
Peter:
I wouldn´t want it to be now! Jeez, let me get my diploma first! What I mean was, that I can´t see myself having kids with anyone besides her. She would make for a terrific mom.
Danny:
Where as with Chantay, she would force our kids to live in a house that´s entirely pink, inside and out, where they know ten times more about what´s happening on "West Drive", than how to take care of themselves!
Peter:
She´s not that bad.
Danny:
I love Chantay, don´t get me wrong ...
Peter smiles at him, making him stop talking.
Peter:
That´s the first time I´ve heard you say that you love her.
Danny thinks about her and smiles to himself.
Danny:
Why wouldn´t I? She´s so sweet and caring.
Peter:
Same with Mia. She can be a little uptight and maybe we don´t make for a picture perfect couple, but whatever we have has worked for close to a year. How many couples at school have lasted that long?
Danny:
The closest in our grade are me and Chantay. I took it for granted, that we would last until graduation at least. Now I don´t know if she´ll ever talk to me again.
Peter:
We both have some serious sucking up to do, if we´re going to get them back!
Danny:
We´re two intelligent young men in our prime! We have to be able to come up with something, that will win them back!
They try to come up with something.
6. Int. Classroom. Morning.
We see Peter, Derek and Danny looking over a sketch, that Peter has drawn up.
Peter:
Here´s the plan. At precisely 11.30, the dinner bell will ring and that´s when we spring into action. Everything has to be done perfectly and according to plan. Got it?
Derek:
Tell us what to, Captain Kirk!
The other two shake their heads at his Trekkie nerdiness.
7. Int. Hallway. Day.
We cut to Kendra, who´s coming out of a classroom. Derek rushes up to her.
Peter (voice over):
Derek, your job will be to distract Kendra, so she can´t host Degrassi TV. Whatever you come up with had better be good, because if you fail, the rest of the plan will too!
Derek:
Kendra! I´m so glad, I caught you!
Kendra looks puzzled as to why he´s talking to her.
Kendra:
Do I know you?
Derek:
I´m Derek. There´s an emergency, so you have to go and see Hatzilakos. She wants to tell you in person, I guess.
Kendra:
I could just call home and find out ...
She starts to get her cell phone out, but Derek stops her.
Derek:
Please! She entrusted me with telling you. If you don´t show up, it´ll reflect badly on me.
Kendra:
Why would she want you to tell me, when we´ve never spoken until now?
Derek:
That´s a great question and one you should be asking her in stead of me! Now go!
Kendra:
What about Degrassi TV?
Derek:
I´ll let them know that you´re running late. It can´t be the first time it´s happened.
Kendra:
Tell them that I´ll be there as soon as I can.
She runs off to the principal´s office, as Derek gets his phone out and calls someone. He puts the phone to his ear.
Derek:
The Sparrow has fled the nest.
He puts the phone away and smiles to himself.
8. Int. Other Hallway. Day.
We cut to Peter who puts his phone away, as he shakes his head to himself.
Peter:
Can he be any more of a geek?
Danny:
I don´t see how. Did he get the job done?
Peter:
That´s what he said. Are you ready?
They fist bump and do a secret handshake, that´s as nerdy as anything Derek has done. We see that they´re right outside of the TV studio and that Peter has a guitar case with him. Danny leaves him and goes into the TV studio, as Peter sits in waiting.
9. Int. TV Studio. Day.
Danny comes in to find a worried Toby there.
Toby:
Have you seen Kendra? It´s not like her to be late and not give word.
Danny:
They didn´t tell you?
Toby:
Tell me what?
Danny:
The show today has been cancelled. That´s why she´s not here.
Toby looks like he´s having trouble buying it.
Toby:
Why wouldn´t they have told me?
Danny:
How should I know? Ask her.
Toby:
How do you know, when I didn´t?
Danny:
I happened to be waiting outside the principal´s office, when Hatzilakos told her.
That Toby can buy!
Toby:
What did you do this time, Danny?
Danny:
Nothing too bad. Anyway, I´m off to get some lunch. Are you coming?
Toby:
I´ll find Kendra first to find out, what´s going on.
Danny:
All I know is that there´s a sloppy joe with my name on it, calling my name all the way from the cafeteria!
The leave the studio together.
10. Int. Other Hallway. Day.
Peter watches Toby and Danny walk away from the studio together and quickly hurries into the TV studio.
11. Int. Cafeteria. Day.
Mia is in line for food, when Danny pushes past several people in line to get to her, making some of them angry at him with some almost getting violent.
Danny:
Chill! I´ll get in the back of the line, after I´ve talked to Mia!
Mia turns her head and is surprised at the sight, as he finally reaches her.
Mia:
That was brave!
Danny:
You have to watch Degrassi TV today!
Mia:
So I can find out how the Lacrosse team did and be told, that the cafeteria menu once again, to my surprise every time, hasn´t been changed?
Danny:
It´s a ... special broadcast today. Trust me, you do not want to miss it!
Mia:
Thanks for letting me know.
Someone throws some food at Danny, who gets the message and goes to the back of the line.
12. Int. Classroom. Day.
Mia comes in and goes to join Darcy, Jane and Chantay, who are waiting for class to start. She sits down with them.
Mia:
I hear that there´s something special on Degrassi TV today.
Chantay:
Maybe it´s to tell us, that we can have the afternoon off.
Darcy:
We can always dream, can´t we?
Jane nods in agreement.
13. Int. TV Studio. Day.
Peter has barricaded the door with whatever he could find, including the desk that the host usually sits by. He turns the camera on and picks up his guitar.
14. Int. Classroom. Day.
The TV turns on and the girls are very amused to see a clueless looking Peter with his face all the way up in the camera.
Peter (on the TV):
Is it on or not? How can you tell?
We cut to the girls, who are laughing their butts off, except for Mia, whose face is bright red with shame.
Jane:
What´s he doing?
Mia:
Making a fool of himself!
She can barely look, but can´t not look either.
15. Int. TV Studio. Day.
Peter grabs his guitar and stands in front of the camera.
Peter:
I don´t know how long it´s gonna be, until they break down the door or if the camera is on. If it is then I want to tell you, Mia, that I know that we´re different in some ways, but we aren´t in the one way that matter above all else. I love you and when I´m with you, I feel like I´m with the one, I´m supposed to be with. I know you feel the same way.
He starts playing "With or Without You" by U2 on his guitar.
16. Int. Classroom. Day.
All eyes are now fixed on Mia, whose face is about the color of a ripe tomato. Chantay especially loves the romantic gesture, though.
Peter (On the TV/Singing):
Through the storm, we reach the shore
You gave me all, but I want more
And I´ll wait for you
Mia:
I can´t believe, he did that!
Darcy:
If that doesn´t show that he loves you, what will?
Jane:
Give him one more chance, Mia. The boy at least deserves an A for effort!
Chantay:
I wish, I had a man, who would sing to me like that.
Just as he says so, Danny comes through the door and looks her in the eyes.
Danny (singing):
Slight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails, she makes me wait
And I´ll wait without you
Jane and Darcy´s jaws drop at what an amazing singer he is, as Chantay comes over to him, looking ready to forgive him.
Danny (singing):
With or without you
With or without you, my love
I can´t live, with or without you
She kisses him as the rest of the class explode in cheers for them. After the kiss is broken, they smile at each other, looking happy to be reunited.
Chantay:
Is it true? That you can´t live without me?
Danny:
I can´t tell you what will happen when we graduate. But right now at this moment, I don´t think I could.
Chantay:
That´s good enough for me!
They hug and don´t notice Mia leaving the classroom.
17. Int. Other Hallway. Day.
Peter is being dragged out. His mother looks at him sternly.
Hatzilakos:
I hope that it was worth it!
Peter:
Did she see it?
Mia comes running up to them and smiles at him.
Mia:
I saw it. I love you too.
It makes him relieved to hear her say it.
Hatzilakos:
As your mother, I´m happy for you, Peter. But as your principal, I still have to punish you. Three weeks detention.
Mia:
Can I have detention with him? It feels like the least, I can do.
Hatzilakos rolls her eyes at them.
Hatzilakos:
Lord help us all, if you two decide to have kids!
She walks away from them, as they share a nice reunion kiss.
18. Int. Classroom. Day.
Petrino is teaching math class for the Juniors once again and is handing back their reports.
Petrino:
I have to admit, that some of you did better, than I thought you would.
He hands Mia and Peter their report and they see that they got an A. Both of them look pleased.
Petrino:
While others had trouble with their sense of realism.
He hands Danny and Chantay their report and they see that they got a C. They look disappointed.
Danny:
Sorry, sir. Once we got started, I couldn´t say no to her.
Petrino:
Welcome to the world of every straight guy walking the planet! You actually learned something useful. Then we had those, where their goals seemed to be going in all kinds of different directions.
He hands Jane and Darcy their paper back and they got a B, which they´re not too depressed over.
Petrino:
It wasn´t as easy, as you thought it would be. Was it, miss Vaughn?
Jane:
Not when you want completely different things out of life.
Petrino:
Then I dare to say, that you have learned a valuable lesson too.
Jane looks like she agrees with him.
CLOSING CREDITS