Neither one of them shows up to dinner. When I get back to the library, they're sitting at my table. After they left, I pulled out some craft books and bookmarked a few pages. Garfield is jabbering on about something. Richard is still a little annoyed, but they both seem pretty happy, despite running off and skipping dinner.
"Hey this is a great idea!" Garfield points to a piece of paper where I wrote down "pop-up poster". It was the best solution I could come up with. Garfield wanted something more elaborate and we wanted to do something easy. The craft books had instructions on making pop-up greeting cards. We could use the same technique to add some 3-D elements to our poster. I'd also gone through the research that Richard printed out and highlighted the things we should include in our poster. I take a seat across from them at the table.
"He's right. This is a good idea." Richard agrees. "Still unnecessary, but whatever."
"It'll be fun." Garfield says. "Speaking of fun, who wants to play a game?" He goes over to the stack of board games.
"Pass." Richard says, he gets up and goes to the computers. Garfield looks at me, but I grab the book I was reading. He sighs, but pulls out his handheld game thing from his pocket.
We all leave the library before lights out and get to bed on time. In the morning Richard doesn't sit with us at breakfast. We spend the morning watching a movie, doing holiday crafts and only after lunch does she force us to work on our projects. We go to the library where she's prepared art supplies and kids who need to do their research can use the encyclopedias and computers. Garfield and Richard come over to my usual table. Richard sits down, but Garfield snags a bunch of art supplies and a big white posterboard.
"I'll copy all the information onto the board." Richard volunteers. "If you two want to decorate." That was the job that I wanted to do, but to argue I'd have to talk to them, so instead I grab a sheet of paper and do a quick sketch of a layout for the posterboard, scribbling where the text should go and where Garfield can put his popups. We'll do a big candy cane popup to the right. Then to go with one of the ideas on where they came from, we'll do a popup of a few chorus boys on the bottom left. I show it to them and Garfield grins, but takes it for a minute and adds some snowflake popups in the left corner. I shrug because he can do whatever he wants. Richard doesn't seem to mind either. I point to the chorus boys and start working on cutting paper out for the shapes. Garfield starts on the giant candy cane. At first Garfield tries to tell jokes, but Richard threatens to cut his tongue off with the scissors, so he stops.
"This is looking nice," Ms. Flores says. "What are those?" she points to what I'm working on. They boys look at me for a minute, but I'm not saying anything in front of them, so they'll have to talk.
"It's thought that candy canes came from Germany. A 1670 choirmaster made them to keep his choirboys from fidgeting during the long nativity ceremony." Richard explains. "His bosses didn't think candy belonged in church, so he shaped them like the shepherds cane. They were originally white; they didn't get their red stripes until later." Ms. Flores beams and I sense she's very happy.
"That's very interesting! I can't wait until you present to the class on Thursday. Good work," she moves on to another group and we finish working. By the end of class, we're done, or so I think. The next day Garfield adds glitter to the snowflakes and red of the candy cane.
On Thursday we spend the morning presenting, which is done with the enthusiasm of taking an exam. Everyone chose to do posters, but I have to admit ours is the best. The 3D elements really pop and none of my classmates are artistically gifted. When it's our turn to present Richard and I hold the poster, Garfield volunteered to do all the talking. He just reads the stuff on the poster and I'm relieved, because I was sure he would add in some jokes. When everyone is done, we spend the rest of the day watching a movie and Ms. Flores passes out cupcakes, cookies and hot chocolate to celebrate the last day of class before break.
On Friday I make sure to eat everything on my plate at breakfast. The annual party is right after lunch, so I'll have to skip in case anyone shows up early. Garfield joins me, the way he has been every day since the nightmare accident. He still hasn't said why, but I'm getting used to it. If anything, it makes me look more normal, so I can't complain. The more I blend in the better. He's excited about the party and already talking about how he'll impress the guests with his jokes. I want to warn him to keep his mouth shut, because his jokes suck, but maybe it's better if he finds out the hard way.
After breakfast Garfield disappears, probably to pick out his clothes for the party and get ready. The girls in my room are probably doing the same. When I get to the library Richard is already there on the computers. He turns around for a half-second, but then goes back to what he was doing. I spend the morning reading. After lunch the door opens and Garfield comes in. He's wearing nice pants and a button-down shirt with a clip-on bowtie. He has his hair slicked back with gel.
"How come you guys didn't come to lunch?" he asks.
"Not hungry." Richard says. Garfield looks at me, but I look away.
"Aren't you coming to the party?" He asks. I shake my head.
"You know I don't go to those things." Richard says.
"Awe... Can't you just go this once? I want to go to the party with friends for once." Garfield says. There's that word again, friends. What does he even mean by that?
"No." Richard doesn't even turn around to look at him. He looks at me again and I return my gaze to my book.
"Fine." he pouts. He turns to leave.
"You can tell us how much fun we missed after," Richard says without turning around. His words turn Garfield's sadness into joy almost instantly. He turns back around and grins, radiating happiness.
"I sure will!" he says. I watch him head outside and look at Richard, but he doesn't turn around.
It's obvious when the party starts. Music booms into the library from downstairs and I can feel the house filling up with strangers, all their emotions swirling together into a massive blob of chaos. In case anyone gets curious and goes places they shouldn't, I move to sit between the shelves. Last year I was too preoccupied to think about what was happening downstairs, but now I'm curious. Why is Garfield so excited? We got extra sweets in class yesterday, so it's not like getting candy and cake is all that exciting. There will be more on Christmas too. Why is the music so loud? Can they still talk to the strangers if the music is that loud? Why are the people here anyway? Whenever strangers come for these parties, it's rarely those strangers that end up taking any of the kids out of here, so why bother? Do they just eat and talk to people? Are there games? It's probably not that fun, but I'm still curious...
When the music stops and the house calms down Garfield doesn't come back. I move to the table so he knows I'm still here and Richard stays at the computer, but by lights out he's not back. Richard notices too. He doesn't say anything, but he keeps turning around to look at the door. I shouldn't, but I follow him to the boy's room when he leaves. He's surprised, but he doesn't say anything. He just goes in on his own. I can tell even without following him that Garfield isn't there. We're not supposed to go downstairs this late, but I go down anyway. The living room is covered in green and red streamers, there are balloons on the ceiling, but no Garfield. I go to the kitchen next, but he's not there either. I head back towards the stairs and find Richard coming down them.
"I think I know I where he is." I follow him to the kitchen. He goes out the back door. It's freezing and neither of us is wearing a jacket. I hug my arms to my chest and shiver. We go to the side of the house and Garfield is sitting under a tree in the snow, his head buried in his arms. Despair... Sadness... Hurt... Why is he upset? Didn't he say the party would be fun? Richard stops walking a few yards away, but I go in front of him and pully myself into a squat, letting my weight rest on the backs of my heels. I rest my hands on my knees. If he notices I'm here he doesn't say anything, so I touch his hand, but only for a second. He looks up and his eyes are watery.
"Are you okay?" Richard asks, which is a stupid question because obviously he's not okay. As if in agreement, Garfield puts his head back down. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"What do you care? You're both nice to me one minute and ignoring me the next." Oh... his words surprise me. Why does he insist on following me around if he doesn't like how I treat him? Richard is less surprised. He remains calm and bends down next to me.
"I'm sorry." His voice is soft, but I can tell Garfield hears him because his hurt lessens up a bit. No one says anything for a few minutes, but then Garfield speaks.
"Some of the other kids made up a song about me. Everyone laughed." he mumbles.
"At least you'll be memorable. No one will remember any of them." His words don't comfort Garfield. Being remembered as the target of a joke, is not something valuable to be remembered as. Richard is useless... Other than his apology, everything that comes out of his mouth is just making it worse.
"They'll remember me as an interesting story to tell their friends, not as someone to call family." I pat his hand again a couple times. There's nothing we can say that will make him feel better. He'll just have to learn to let what they think go and maybe learn to deal with the fact that he might not ever find someone here who wants to call him family. I haven't been here very long, but I know that the odds of anyone here being adopted are slim. The other girls talked about it all the time. People want babies, whom they think they can shape and mold into the perfect child or who at least don't have ugly histories. No one wants a kid who's already had parents.
"It looks like you got what you wanted at least." Richard says. I look at him, because I don't know what he's talking about. Garfield looks up too. "If we weren't friends, we wouldn't be out here in the cold for you." There's that word again... I'm not sure how I feel about it, or if it's even true, but for once it was the right thing to say because Garfield perks up just a little bit.
"We better get inside." Richard stands up and gives Garfield a hand, pulling him up before we head to the house. The warm air that flows out from the kitchen is heaven. My hands hurt from the cold.
Ms. Kinders is on duty tonight and she finds us halfway to the stairs.
"I see we have three volunteers for cleanup duty tomorrow morning," she crosses her arms over her chest and gives us that look, that adults give to kids when they're in trouble. "Get upstairs right now." I go to bed without brushing my teeth or even changing my clothes. So we're friends?