Chapter 42 – A Rising Darkness

Author's Note: Everything in this chapter has been the plan from the beginning. :):):)

To Guest: I don't know anything about Exar Kun, so Theseus won't be training with him. :P And like I've said before, we don't know anything about the Dark Disciple arc, so none of that will be included or appear. :)

Thank you so much for reviewing! :D

~ Amina Gila

The sound of rain hitting the window finally wakes Theseus. No, he's not ready to get up, not ready to face the day yet. He wants to pretend yesterday was nothing but a horrible nightmare, but in the end, none of that will change anything. Whether he gets up now or ten minutes from now, it will change nothing.

A sigh escaping him, Theseus slowly sits up on the couch in the living room of Anakin's apartment. The day might be just beginning, but he's already so worn out that he doesn't want to move or do anything.

Not that he's going to realistically have the luxury of that. He's been in the healer's wing for days, and Obi-Wan and the 212th definitely need his help. He finally drags himself off the couch, heading in to the 'fresher. By the time he's out, Anakin is sitting listlessly on the couch, staring almost blankly at the wall.

Theseus heads back to the couch, taking a seat next to him. The silence, other than the rain outside, feels practically deafening, but he isn't sure what to say. He's not going to ask him if he's alright. Neither of them are, and there's no point pretending otherwise.

"Want to eat anything?" Theseus suggests finally.

Anakin shakes his head.

"Me neither."

Silence falls over them again, and Theseus can only try to take comfort in Anakin's presence. At least he's one person he hasn't lost. Yet. He's lost so much in the past month.

"I wanted to thank you," Anakin says, finally. "For everything you did for me, and for... her."

"It's what friends do," Theseus replies. He's well aware of how they both need to get moving, but they're equally exhausted from the past couple days. And besides, he really thinks they could use a break. Ahsoka's always been here, for nearly as long as Theseus was Obi-Wan's padawan, and... he has no idea how to start without her.

He doesn't know how long they've been sitting there before Obi-Wan enters. Even if he hadn't been nearly as involved as the others, he seems unusually subdued. "I'm sorry," he says at last.

"I know." Anakin stands, avoiding his gaze.

"You told us to let the Senate decide her fate," Theseus says, bitterly. It's not Obi-Wan's fault and he knows it. It's unfair to hold him accountable for it, but... He's angry and hurt, and he's lashing out, even if he ought not to.

"I thought they would look into it more."

"Like the Council did?" Anakin snaps.

Surprisingly, Obi-Wan doesn't argue. "The Senate requested she be handed over," he replies, "Refusing would have been seen as opposition, and we assumed that she would receive an impartial trial regardless."

"I heard," Anakin replies, flatly. "It – I should go. I don't suppose Rex heard what happened yet."

Somehow, Theseus hadn't even thought about it yet. The clones don't know she left, even if they've heard everything else, and breaking the news to them will be the hardest part.

Anakin slips past them, heading out, leaving the two of them standing in silence. It feels almost uncomfortable, even if it ought not to be.

"We have things to attend to, padawan," Obi-Wan speaks finally, though the tone is more gentle than normal.

Theseus nods, silently following his master out the door.

**w**

Every time he turns around it's like he's expecting to see Ahsoka suddenly walk up, to tell him that she's coming back, or maybe that he imagined the previous evening entirely and she never left at all. Almost nothing he's ever felt has hurt worse than this, then the fact that his little sister, his daughter even, is gone, that he's never going to see her again. That she chose to walk away. Anakin knows nothing will ever be the same again, not now. He doesn't even know how to keep moving. It feels like time should stop, with how much everything has fallen apart, but of course, it won't.

He has to keep moving, like he always does. The galaxy is depending on him, the boys need him. He can't sit here and let himself fall apart even if there's nothing he wants more right now.

But in a way, sitting here in the apartment is only making it hurt even worse – since apparently that's still possible. Everything still feels like Ahsoka. Staying in here is nothing more than a blatant reminder of how empty the apartment is, of how he's always going to return to an empty apartment now, of how the one person who was always at his side from practically the beginning of the war is gone forever. She was his to take care of, to protect, and he failed. And now, she's gone.

He needs to talk to the boys about what happened. Somehow Anakin manages to drag himself to the hanger, taking a ship up to the waiting cruiser and going to find Rex.

"General," he greets immediately.

"Rex..." Anakin replies, suddenly realizing he's at a loss of how to go about telling them what happened. Ahsoka was important to all of them too, very much like a sister – or as much as she could be when she technically outranked them, and they were at such different statuses.

"What happened... with the Commander?" Rex asks after a moment, which reminds Anakin that they don't even know yet that she was found innocent. The last they heard, she'd been arrested and put on trial, but nothing beyond that.

Talking about it only drives the lightsaber deeper into the already gaping hole in his heart. It's like Ahsoka took a piece with him, and he doesn't know how he'll ever be whole again. He won't be. He can't be. It's simply not possible. "She was thrown out of the Order and... declined the offer to rejoin after she was found innocent," Anakin replies, struggling to keep his voice level as he talks.

The captain's muted shock and horror swirl in the Force around him. "She's not coming back?" Rex asks slowly, clearly struggling to accept what he's hearing.

"No." Why does it feel like every moment, every second, the pain is only getting worse?

Rex hardly even seems sure how to respond to that. He's in shock, which is unsurprising. Not that there's really anything to say even, anyway. Ahsoka is gone, and nothing anyone does can change that.

**w**

"Is everything alright, Commander?" Cody looks like he's feeling seriously awkward and uncomfortable the moment the question leaves his mouth.

Theseus is hardly surprised that he noticed. Even if he still doesn't want to do anything, he finally headed up to the main 212th cruiser. Life won't stop, no matter how much he wants it to.

"Not really," he sighs, "I'm assuming you heard about what was going on with Ahsoka?" Saying the name out loud sends a fresh wave of pain and longing washing through him.

"We heard that she'd been accused of bombing the Temple," Cody replies.

"She was thrown out of the Order and put on trial by the Senate. Anakin and I found who did it in the meantime, so she was acquitted, but after that, she didn't want to come back." He doesn't hide the bitterness in his tone. It's all because of the Councils' stupidity. They should have listened to the Force.

"I... didn't realize that the Jedi were able to leave."

"What? – Oh. Yeah, we can, even if it's rarely done." Why did it only hit him this very moment that no matter how much any of the clones want to leave – and he could hardly blame any of them for that – they can't? They'd be arrested if they even tried to leave, even though fighting the war was never their choice in the first place. To be fair, it wasn't really most of the individual Jedi's choices to join the war either, but technically, they at least have the option of leaving.

"I'm sorry to hear what happened," says Cody, sounding slightly uncomfortable again. They generally never have conversations this personal, so he knows it's got to be awkward for the clone, even if they are friends.

"We'll be fine," Theseus says, instead, because they have to be. There's no other choice but to keep moving, there never is. "What's the update on the war?"

**w**

"How is he?"

Athea looks up as Theseus enters Caleb's room, moving to take a seat next to her. It's hard to have to tell him this only the evening after Ahsoka left. Athea can understand why she did what she did, after being thrown out like that. In Ahsoka's place, Athea supposes she would have done likewise. Now that it's over, she can't deny feeling a nagging guilt for not doing more to defend Ahsoka. It's too late for regrets, and... in a way, that's what makes it so bad.

Still, all the questions she herself has always had about the Order are resurfacing again. They're wrong about a lot of things – about having families – and she doesn't know where it ends. She can see now, why Theseus continues to touch the Dark Side, even when all the other Jedi around him are against it. She's not sure she'd actually be ready to go that far, but still.

"It's getting worse," Athea finally answers her son's question. She has to face it now, that her first padawan could be about to die. She failed him.

Theseus looks down, a pained look flickering across his face. Moments like right now she remembers how young he still is. "I'm sorry about what happened with Ahsoka," Athea says softly, moving closer to rest a hand on his shoulder.

He stiffens a little at the mention. "I can't believe she's really gone," he mumbles.

It hurts so much, seeing him like this. Theseus on the verge of falling apart, and Caleb so close to dying, and there's nothing she can do about it. She's supposed to be a Jedi Master. She should be able to do more, to help them, to help the galaxy. "It may not be forever," she offers.

He shakes his head sharply. "She already said she can never come back to the Order, and I don't want to hope..." he trails off, voice slightly shaky now, "Just to be disappointed."

There isn't a risk of anyone coming in unnoticed, so she doesn't hesitate to move closer, pulling Theseus into a hug. It's the only comfort she can really offer him right now.

He leans into her embrace, and for a long moment, neither of them speak. "I never did tell you what happened on Mandalore," he says finally, staring at Caleb's still form.

Right. In the midst of everything, being thrown from one mission to the next and then with the whole bombing thing, she hadn't even had the time to think about it. "What did happen?" she inquires. "Obi-Wan reported that Maul is apparently in control under cover, but..." She's pretty sure that's not what Theseus is planning to tell her. It's likely something more personal, something about... their family.

"It's... Dad..." he begins slowly.

She twitches slightly at the word. It's so jarring to hear him calling Vizsla that, even if it's the truth. Things between her and Pre hadn't ended well, to say the least, and it's something she prefers to not think about at all. (Or how she knows she'll never ever get to know her daughter, who's been raised to hate her.)

"He's gone," Theseus finishes, "I figured you might want to know."

Gone, as in – Oh. Oh. She knows what he's saying. Pre Vizsla is dead.

She... frankly doesn't even know how to react to that news. Personally, it doesn't bother her very much, all things considered. He was a terrible person; she can't believe she didn't see it from the start, and she let him go a long time ago, but she knows how much it's obviously hurting Theseus. (Not to mention her daughter, but she'd rather not go there.)

"I'm sorry," she says quietly.

"I know he was horrible, but he was my father, and..."

"You still care for him."

"Yeah... I guess." He sighs quietly. "He loved me. I know he did, and I never told him it back. I never even said goodbye. Now Ahsoka's gone, and Caleb... who's next?"

She wishes there was something she could tell him, some way she could reassure him that he doesn't need to worry, and everything will work out fine. There's nothing she can say. "It's getting late," Athea observes instead, "I need to prepare for the next mission." The one she'd really rather not go on while Caleb is dying, but...

"You're leaving?" Theseus frowns.

"Yes, unfortunately," she agrees, "Some ancient Sith artifacts were located on a planet in the Outer Rim, and the Council wants me to go retrieve the objects before they fall into... unwanted hands."

"Oh." For some reason, he seems worried.

"What?" she queries.

"I don't know," he sighs, "I... something doesn't feel right, about it? Maybe I'm just paranoid."

Or maybe he's not. There are things he's been able to notice more now that he's been touching the Dark Side, she has to admit. It makes her question things that she'd rather not be thinking about. "I'll be careful," she promises, "Don't worry. I'll be back before you know I'm gone."

**w**

The Dark Side is hanging more heavily in the air here than Athea has ever felt before. She can understand now why they wanted a Council member to come here. It's not good for any Jedi to be exposed to something like this. Especially not when they're unstable, but she chooses to ignore that thought as she approaches the ancient building.

Is this a trap? Theseus' concerns ring through her mind again. Even if it is, she can't turn back. This is her mission, and it's a simple one.

The feel of the Dark Side, the coldness of it, wraps all around her as she enters, keeping a hand on her lightsaber as she moves through the building, heading for where the artifacts should still be.

Finally, she reaches the door at the end of the hall, pushing it open and stepping into the dark room. The door hisses closed behind her, plunging everything into pitch blackness, except for the glowing red holocrons on the far side of the room. The artifacts she came here for.

The strength of the Dark Side here is suffocating, and somehow, it's also managing to bring all her dark emotions, all her doubts and questions about the Jedi, spiraling to the surface. About how they could do the things they do if they're really right.

Open me. The holocron seems to ask. With promises of power, strength, knowledge, and guidance... everything she so badly needs right now.

It's forbidden, Athea knows that, but as she stares transfixed at the glowing red objects in front of her, the only thing that might be able to provide answers in a situation like this, she suddenly can't find it in herself to care anymore.

**w**

In his mostly unconscious state, time is of little meaning. Distant noises, people talking, lights on and off, it all vaguely blends together in the back of Caleb's mind when he occasionally slips a little closer to consciousness.

It's the sudden cold, all-encompassing darkness that wraps around him which nearly jars him entirely back to consciousness. What's happening?! He's never felt anything like this before. The Force – is that the Dark Side?! – only seems to be growing in intensity around him.

He doesn't know how long this is dragging on, but it seems like eternity. The darkness doesn't actually feel dangerous either, which confuses him even more. It's also only serving to scare him more, or it would be, if he was conscious enough to form coherent thoughts right now.

For a moment, he's almost certain that he senses Athea before he suddenly jolts awake. "Master?" Caleb asks, looking around the room. More time must have passed then he thought because there's a healer next to him now who looks almost frantic, and behind her stands a very worried Theseus.

"She's not here," Theseus answers, still looking around the room with a frown on his face.

"I don't know how this is possible," the healer frowns, then looks down at him, "Do you know what happened? Was anyone in here with you?"

"What?" Caleb coughs, confused.

"You were in serious condition," Theseus explains, "And someone must have been in here, healing you with the Force."

"The Dark Side," the healer objects with a frown.

What?! So that's – "How's that possible?" he protests.

"I don't know," the healer responds, shaking her head, "But we need to get you checked up and see what your condition is now."

The healer shoos Theseus out of the room and begins to work on checking on Caleb's condition. Apparently, he'd been close to... dying? It doesn't really feel real to hear, and he's not really sure how he feels about the news. Now he's almost entirely better, except that he'll still have to go through a lot of physical therapy. And there are some things – including being able to walk properly – that the healer says he might never fully regain. Only time will tell.

**w**

This doesn't make any sense, and it isn't looking very good. Obi-Wan isn't entirely sure what to make of it all, but the implications aren't something he really wants to consider. Still, if Luminara's former padawan Fell, then... "We can't find Master Shan anywhere," Obi-Wan informs his padawan.

"What do you mean 'can't find her'?" Theseus demands, voice rising a little.

"She disappeared," he replies. "She won't answer anyone's calls, and we tried tracing her ship and Jedi communicator, but neither gave us any leads whatsoever on her whereabouts. The Council dispatched several Jedi to check out the location of the Sith artifacts, but no one is there, and the artifacts are missing as well."

"But who would take those artifacts other than a Sith?"

Someone who actually had already Fallen, or who suddenly had too much interest in them? Obi-Wan doesn't want to believe something like that could be true about Athea, but the timing doesn't make any sense otherwise. "Someone who was interested in them, perhaps," Obi-Wan suggests finally.

Theseus practically glares at him, obviously understanding the unspoken implications. "Master Shan would never do that."

"It is unlikely," Obi-Wan agrees, "But no one sensed any danger from her. It is a possibility that we may have to face."

"Yeah, the same way we had to face the possibility that Ahsoka might've Fallen," he snaps, turning on his heel and stalking over to the apartment window to glare out at the passing traffic.

It's another blatant reminder of how hard he's taking what happened with Ahsoka, even if it was her decision to leave in the end, not the Council's. Especially given how Caleb was mysteriously healed and the Dark Side could be felt so strongly in the room, Obi-Wan has to wonder about Athea, but he knows Theseus is never going to listen. It might be better if he doesn't anyway. He's already been thrown off balance again, and pushed closer to the Dark Side himself, and trying to accept that something like this could've happened to his mother – whether he should be so attached to her or not – isn't going to be easy.

"There's no guarantee of anything, and the Council isn't going to jump to any conclusions," Obi-Wan promises finally, "Perhaps there is a lot more going on than anyone knows, or her disappearance and that of the artifacts isn't entirely connected. Right now, what we need to do is focus on finding her."

Final Notes: If you want to join our Discord to receive updates or just hang out, here's the invite link, and please delete the spaces! :) discord . gg / nqSxuz2

We also have a tumblr account (and delete the spaces): fanfictasia . tumblr . com

And! We have a YT channel for tributes! Please delete the spaces in the link. :D youtube channel / UC_g1M5rSCxJUzQCRS29B6pA

Finally, if you're interested, you can submit a SW gift fic request via the following form (delete the spaces): forms . gle / rmXWtRomMMaULuPa6