Shepard was honestly getting pissed now.
All things considered, he shouldn't have been. Considering that according to the doctors, he was rapidly improving from a physical standpoint, he was on the mend psychologically, and he'd roped Admiral Raan into a quiet little wedding ("My translator did not pick up that last word") - bonding - scheme.
Things should have been great. Realistically, they were. So why did he feel so damn frustrated?
Well, Shepard reckoned it was because he'd done countless extranet searches, been through who knows how many sellers (admittedly, there were far fewer now than there were even a year ago); hell, he had even checked locations in the Terminus systems. No luck. Not a bit.
Hi sighed, rubbing his forehead in frustration.
It would appear, at least to Shepard, that the Milky Way galaxy was completely out of gold.
Whoops.
"Unbelievable. I cannot have all of this go to shit because 'Commander Shepard' couldn't find any…fucking gold." He was growling now, and he found himself, for the first time since the end of the war, truly angry. He was so angry, in fact, that the telltale blue glow of his biotics - another "first", this time since waking up in the Citadel - was starting to light up around his balled fists. He took a few deep breaths to calm himself down after the initial shock had worn off.
Out of morbid curiosity, he had even done searches for other precious metals - silver, platinum, and the like - and those, too, had come up empty. "Un-fucking-believable," he muttered, trying to calm himself down again. Was it all just another byproduct of the war? Should he have done a bit more research before jumping headlong into making promises that he couldn't keep? Then he'd been stupid enough to first bring Admiral Raan into this before he could guarantee that he could find what he needed.
He was going to look and feel like a complete ass.
"Really should have tucked away some of it while scanning every damn planet in the Terminus," he chastised to himself.
His mood was not at all helped by his missing half, of course. After Kasumi had hopped out of the hospital, he'd spent the rest of Christmas night watching a few vids of he and his crew goofing off between missions. Because of the coinciding dates, he wound up watching video of their last Christmas - before they had hit the Collectors.
The Christmas of 2185 bash had been a wild affair, for a number of reasons. Not least of which was their impending suicide mission (which they would in fact complete just two days later), the presence of Zaeed, Garrus, Grunt, and Jack on the same ship at the same time, and the generally festive nature that had still permeated the human crew. The mood was quick to transfer to the aliens on board, who found the idea - well, at least the gift-giving, party idea - rather endearing. He had smiled warmly as Tali had streaked by with a sealed container of dextro-liquor in one hand and what appeared to have been a Santa hat over her realk as she stalked around the ship, looking for "that bosh'tet turian." He had no idea where she might have gotten one of those.
Ah man, those were the days.
He found another one - that same night - of just him and Tali in their cabin. She had been quite…inebriated…and had insisted that she "was tired of waiting for Morrrrrrdin" to come up with a way for her to finally be with him in a way befitting the person whom she trusted the most - with her life, and she had just started to wonder by then - with her soul. She had been so distraught ("But Jooooohn…I want to kissss you, and just touch you and -") that she had started to sob quietly. He had told her that as soon as it was safe - and not a second before - he would make sure that she would remember it, and that it would be worth the wait. The next morning, after he had shown Tali the recording, she had thanked him profusely for looking out for her like always. She would have regretted it, mostly because she would have had no idea that any of that had even happened.
They both remembered what had happened two days later.
Shepard wasn't referencing the successful destruction of the Collector base, either. He was referencing something far more important and, he would argue, pivotal.
Turns out that the wait had, in fact, been totally worth it.
With a huff, Shepard gave up on his search for gold for now, and he closed his omnitool. Instead, he thought of Tali, like always. He thought of her hand in his. He thought of some of the times at night when she would fall asleep, not quite making it to the end of whatever dumb vid he'd suggested that they watch. Even asleep, he would lovingly caress and lightly rub her back as her helmeted head laid in his lap. God, what he wouldn't give to be able to do that right this fucking second. Well, he wouldn't give gold, if he actually had any. "Damn it," he muttered again in frustration. That thought pulled him out of what had been a somewhat peaceful meandering of thought. With a start, he slouched forward with his head in his hands and his elbows on his knees. His right foot bounced in a steady, speedy rhythm on his toes. Why couldn't shit ever - literally ever - just be relatively simple?
He needed a backup plan, and soon. He needed a -
"Hiya, Shep!"
Thief?
He froze, his foot stopping its frenetic pace with his heel at its apex above the floor.
Finally reconnecting all the dots, Shepard chuckled at the timing and turned to look at the intrepid thief. "Hey Kasumi. Forget something?"
She bounced in cheerfully. Despite what had been bothering her - well, at least what Shepard knew about - she maintained her cheerfulness that was so infectious. She skipped into the room, garnering confused glances from the few nurses that had watched her glide past their station, wondering where the hell, exactly, she had come from.
She sat in Tali's chair and smiled at him. "Nope. I've got something for you. Call it a 'Christmas gift' of sorts."
He was unsure whether he should be appreciative, apprehensive, or both. "Um, thanks? You didn't have to get me -"
A smile was easily evident on her face. "Shepard, stop it. It was the least I could do. And besides," she opened up her omnitool and tapped a few buttons, "it's not really for you. Well, not just you, that is." Shepard's omnitool pinged to life. He looked at it, then at her, then back again, before opening it up and tapping a few keys (with more than a hint of trepidation) to see what exactly she had sent him.
He muttered something incomprehensible. "Kasumi…how did you? You didn't steal this did you?"
She regarded him with that comically hidden grin.
Like the damn Cheshire Cat.
"Oh come now, Shep. I would not hand off hot merchandise to you. And I don't do 'petty' thievery. It's so…tacky. Besides, it's already on its way."
Shepard again studied the letters and numbers on his omnitool. It was a receipt for shipment of five kilos of gold…to be sent directly to the Tonbay, care of Admiral Shala'Raan vas Tonbay. He could have hugged her if he wasn't still so shocked.
"Kasumi…" he breathed. At first, he had no reaction. So taut was his mind with the stress and strain of his lamentable search that it was unable to elasticize itself enough to enable comprehension. In short?
Dumbstruck.
Flabbergasted.
Gobsmacked, even.
Once more, he was reminded of friendship, and what it meant to him. Even someone like Kasumi, whom he would not have considered to be one of his closest friends, had managed to have been moved enough by him to warrant an act such as this. He was eternally grateful for her kinship.
He cleared his throat as she eyed him hopefully. "Kasumi…I don't know what to say, except just…thank you. This means so much."
"Aw, c'mon now Shep. Don't get all sappy on me now. I owed you as much."
He smiled and shook his head, still not quite believing the astonishing circumstances that found him now, face-to-face with the eminent thief in the galaxy. And he wasn't some mark, or some fool to be taken advantage of, they were friends who helped one another. If dying once and coming damn near it more than a few other times was the price to pay for such things? Well, it was almost worth it.
Almost.
"You owed me nothing, and you know it. Besides, if I recall correctly, Cerberus paid you well for your services."
"Yeah Shep. I know." She turned her face up to him, almost revealing her full features. "And you're welcome."
He chuckled. "So, I have to ask: where did you come up with it? I searched literally everywhere for even a measly kilo of the stuff, and you just casually ship off 5 of them to Rannoch for me."
"Well, I didn't like getting paid in credits. I like tangible things that have value, 'hedge against inflation' and all that. So I converted a lot of it to precious metals - including gold."
"I guess that's explanation enough. I suspect that you're probably set for the rest of your life then."
He caught her smirk. "Something like that."
She paused again, before asking an obvious question. "So when are you going to ask her? Or tell her? Or whatever quarians do when they want to get married?"
Shepard became incredibly still, his eyes wide. Between therapy and all of the trouble that he'd had just to get what he needed, he hadn't even thought about this part. He knew that Tali would say "yes" - that was obvious - but the topic still needed to be broached properly. How had it slipped his mind?
"Uh…that is a very good question."
She laughed at him. Mightily.
Men.
"You know," she brought her legs up to sit cross-legged in Tali's chair, "I think maybe you should do it on Rannoch. Can you imagine?" Kasumi began to move her hands dramatically. "Walking along some great cliff on her homeworld, the sun setting behind you, the light touches her mask." She let out a sigh. "Shep, it'll be beautiful."
He considered this, and was at once entranced by the idea and embarrassed for not thinking of this part himself.
"Kasumi, you're brilliant. And…I'm…well I guess I'm still not very good at this sort of thing. Considering all that's happened, I've only been wired to do one thing, and this wasn't it."
"Shep, it's okay. That's what I'm here for. After all, I'm the hopeless romantic here."
When Kasumi stopped talking, he could see her lips draw into a small frown, and he was convinced that there was something else on her mind. For obvious reasons.
"So, what else is going on Kasumi? I figured that you would have bounded out of here by now, not that I mind the company."
"Yeah…about that, Shep."
Finally. Here it comes.
She bore holes into the tiled hospital floor while pulling her knees back up to her chest. She took a deep breath.
"I'm sure you're aware that Garrus and I had a thing. Or have a thing. I don't really know which now." She said this simply, without tone or emotion. Shepard figured that she was putting forth a supreme effort to say it in such a way.
"Yeah, something like that. He didn't talk about it often during the war, and I didn't pry. But you did come up from time to time."
"I'm sure." He had expected a disdainful tone with that remark. There was no evidence that there was any. Again, matter-of-factly. "He wanted us to focus on just making it out of the war alive. That was his priority." She paused then, clearly lost in her thoughts. "He said that it should be my priority too."
"And was it?" The question was automatic, he didn't even think to not ask it.
"What kind of question is that, Shepard? Of course it was. But…it was so…messy, feeling that way." She looked him in the eyes. "And I hate 'messy'. I like 'clean and easy'. This was anything but. How did you and Tali do it? Be so close, so damn in love throughout the war?"
"Well, I can tell you that we needed each other, Kasumi. In a very personal way." She cocked her head in curiosity. "It's kinda complicated to explain, but well, let's just say that it became very difficult to be without each other. I could not have done it - and I mean this literally - without her with me."
Shepard thought about what she'd said about herself and Garrus. He knew that Garrus could be complicated, that he avoided attachment if he could help it. But he also knew that he was a good man, and that his intentions were good. He remembered a few times over drinks in the Normandy bar when Garrus would question if he had made the right call. Shepard had reminded him that, if he hadn't, and Kasumi ended up hurt - or dead - alongside him, that he would have never forgiven himself.
"For what it's worth, he cared about you, Kasumi. He wanted you to be safe, so that when we finally defeated the Reapers, you two could perhaps get a fresh start." He smiled at her reassuringly. "You're just going to have to get used to it. You have people that give a shit about you."
And it wasn't just David Archer, my friend. He did not say that part out loud.
She returned his smile with a sad one of her own. "I know, but attachments are so hard."
"Yeah, I know. But sometimes they're worth it, right?"
"Hmmph. Yeah, sometimes." He caught a hint of a smile. "So, speaking of 'attachments'…"
"Uh huh…?"
The hint of the smile became much broader now. "Oh, I think you're going to be stuck with me for a while longer."
He cocked an eyebrow. "Oh?"
"Yup. Whenever you and Tali decide to go to Rannoch, I'd like to come with you." Her voice was lively and bright, like she was excited about something for the first time in years. Perhaps it wasn't far off the mark.
Shepard was not even surprised. "Well, that's good to know. Any particular reason why, Kasumi? I mean, that seems a little random. Again, not a complaint."
"Oh, I know Shepard. I'm coming because that's where you and Tali are getting married, right? Or 'bonded'?" She shook her head and waved a hand dismissively. "Whatever the quarian term is. And I want to be there for her. Well, you too. But she needs another girl to help her out." She giggled again. "Well, someone besides Liara, anyway."
Shepard shook his head. "And I'm sure that Garrus has nothing to do with it."
An expression of mock surprise spread across what he could see of her face. "Oh definitely not, Shep."
What a kidder.
The air was, to no one's surprise, crisp and cold (albeit quite damp) on this late December evening. A light fog had descended as the sun went down, typical weather for almost anywhere located along the banks of the Thames. It gave the world an ethereal, ghostly look to it. Ghostly, but not in a dreadful or overbearing way. Perhaps "ethereal" was the better, more accurate term. If anything, Shepard found it to be refreshing. He was feeling much better today, he realized, on this 27th day of December of 2186. Quite a bit of it, he thought, was in no small part to the activities of one Kasumi Goto. Looking over his shoulder, he saw her keeping pace a few meters behind him while making sure to give him some space. A small smile touched his lips.
He still couldn't get over - and likely wouldn't for a fair bit of time - just how insanely fortunate he was. Despite all of the hardships, all of the trauma and baggage that had been woven into his life, he really was fortunate. As he walked to the rhythm of his footfall and the oddly-timed clunk of the cane against pavement, he was not overly surprised - but certainly amused - to think of another very old Earth vid from damn near 250 years ago - It's a Wonderful Life. Now, Shepard was certainly no George Bailey and he was fairly certain that there was no Clarence waiting for some bell chimes, but perhaps the sentiment was the same. He'd already seen what his brutal absence had done to his friends, and now that he had faced the prospect of a far more permanent absence…well, let's just say that he drew some parallels.
Despite the price.
But what made him truly appreciate his fortune, especially this evening?
It was, of course, the pending return of his saera. The last couple of days had been difficult for him. Certainly he had grown more accustomed to the hole that he felt as his time apart from her edged on, and he did not feel quite as defeated as he had during their forced separation, but he would definitely not recommend it. Having a bit of hope, he thought, could make a world of difference. Even so -
"Zero stars out of five, would not recommend," he muttered with a wan smile.
How he had so wanted to hold her, see her, talk to her - to just be near her. And now that time was coming.
He thought of the conversation they'd had while they were on their way back.
"John, I missed you!"
Garrus mockingly repeated her line from somewhere next to her, for which he received a pointed order from Liara to "shut up and let them talk." He had agreed with a gravelly "harumph."
"I missed you too, Tali. How did it go?"
"Keelah, John. There is a lot we need to talk about, but we will not discuss it here. It has to be in-person."
He had frowned slightly at that.
"So, you got what you needed, at least?"
"Yes, we got what we needed, and then some." She shook her head, still in disbelief. "And soon I will get what I need." The implication in her voice was obvious, and he smiled at that.
"What do you mean by 'and then some'? What hap-"
She cut him off. "We'll discuss this when we're back."
That just made even more curious. Like he wasn't antsy enough.
He couldn't help but wonder what they had found there. The way she had spoken…it sounded like there was a lot to unpack. For now, he had no choice but to wait. Besides, he figured that he would find out soon enough. Not that finding out was actually the most important part.
Now with the base in sight, he heard a slight gasp from behind him.
"Hey Kasumi, you good?"
"Shep, look who's here." She had pointed towards an area just to the west of where the Malinor had launched from. Shepard indeed followed her command, and then followed to where she was pointing.
"Well, I'll be damned…"
Under the glorious light of high-powered flood lamps and offset by the water vapor that hung in the air, the SSV Normandy SR-2 lay before them. In a peculiar instance of nature providing the fireworks, its hull gave off a shimmer, it sparkled under the influence of light bent by water. Her long, sleek curves enticed Shepard even now - it was a strange mix of emotions. All at once, memories and feelings - pleasant and otherwise, new and old - came rushing through him.
…If you'll excuse me, Shepard, I have some calibrations to do here…
…See, Gabby? I told ye he'd come downa visit…
…You read Tennyson…
…There's one entry I wanted your opinion on.
Which one?
Your own…
…I brought some music, but I didn't know what you'd like - and I'm babbling…
Suddenly, he stopped. Closing his eyes, he lifted his face to the sky and let out a long, drawn out shudder of a sigh. He hadn't been prepared for this. For the past few weeks, he'd been so focused on what he'd done to stop the Reapers, how much he (and everyone else, as well) had paid to stop those monsters, how he was working to get his future with Tali to take shape, to get himself together so that their future could take shape, that he'd forgotten so much about everything that had led up to that point.
In truth, it was a ridiculous amount of life to take in.
He had simply not been prepared for it.
At all.
Soft footfalls approached from behind, stopping alongside him. A hand touched his shoulder.
"Shep…? You okay?"
With his eyes still closed, he faced the ground and let out another long exhalation.
"I didn't think it'd be this hard, seeing it again."
"The Normandy?"
A sigh. "Yeah. I don't know. It's just…well, there's a lot of my life tied up in that ship."
Kasumi scoffed quietly. "Shep, you're barely past 30."
"I know, but I didn't mean a measure of time."
"Yeah, I knew that. I was just trying to make you feel better."
"I figured." He turned to her. "Thanks, Kasumi. For being here."
A small smile. "Least I could do, Shep."
"Roger that, Malinor. You are cleared for landing at Pad 1"
"Copy. Thank you, Base Control. See you soon."
Liara had taken the controls for the last couple of hours of the journey back to Earth. Garrus had needed a rest - he had piloted the ship the entire way out and most of the way back. Liara felt that it was only fair, since she had been able to take an honest-to-goodness nap on the way out. They hadn't asked Tali since she wasn't at all familiar with the setup of the salarian-made craft.
It was just as well. Tali had far too much on her mind to try to concentrate on navigating a new ship with unfamiliar controls. The admiral scoffed.
"Far too much on my mind." That's an understatement if there ever was one. Keelah, I just need to keep it together for a few more minutes until…oh…I can't take this. I need…
Abruptly, she stood up and starting pacing behind Liara. Back and forth. Back and forth. Back and -
"Tali, it's okay. We're almost there," Liara assured her.
"I know, Liara." She had added far more force than she had intended. She huffed a frustrated sigh. "I'm sorry. But it's…" She had been reasonably fine for this entire trip (aside from her awkward handling of wiping the memory of the Geth ship), but now that Earth was so close, keelah, her body would not let her rest. She had been overcome by this daunting need for him. It had crept up on her slowly but steadily, like the way John would slowly increase the temperature in the shower. What had he said? "Boiling a fog" or something. She hadn't understood the reference, but certainly understood the feeling.
And boy, was she feeling it now.
"It's so hard, being like this. I didn't think that -"
"Being so horny would be this difficult?"
The gravelly voice of Garrus had interrupted her frenzied mutterings in the only way that he knew how - with a stab of well-timed humor blended with yet another human idiom. Tali simply stood there, completely frozen in motion and staring daggers at his smirking face with her unblinking eyes.
When she could respond, it was a response none of them expected - including Tali.
"Yes, Garrus. Because I've never been that before, being stuck in this…in this…" she began to erratically gesture toward her body, "…this fucking suit…and…away from…" she trailed off in a soft sob, and simply crumpled to the floor, shaking quietly.
Concerned, Liara had to break him from his stupor. "Garrus, is she okay?"
He shook his head as her voice yanked him from his malaise. Kneeling down, he put his hands firmly on Tali's shoulders, steadying her quiet shudders before speaking to her in as gentle a tone as he could muster. "Tali, hey. Look at me, okay?"
She hesitantly lifted her head as he'd asked.
"Garrus…" she sniffled, "I'm sorry. It's just…"
"Hey, it's okay. If anything, I'm sorry. I was only trying to lighten the mood. I didn't mean anything by it, you know that, right?"
She gave a sad smile. "Oh, I know that. It's just…I guess I'd heard about how difficult it could be for…bondmates to be away from each other for an extended period, especially early on…and maybe I underestimated it?" Tali released a small laugh. "Liara, I'm sorry for acting like this around you, too."
Liara didn't turn to her since they were entering the atmosphere now. She answered her anyway. "Tali, it is all right. Were you not the one who said that we were 'family'? You do not need to apologize. We're here for you, too." Still looking down at the nav display, she added, "Besides, I recall that you have an asari friend who had her own…breakdown recently, which you helped her work through."
Garrus helped Tali back to her feet. "Liara, I know. And thank you. I mean that."
The asari glanced quickly back over her shoulder to give her a soft smile in return. "We'll call it…'even'?"
Tali's smile was evident, even to them. "Yes, I think that we can."
"Tali, I have a question." A thought had struck the turian. "What about when you were, uh, you know, back with the fleet? You were separated from him for a lot longer and -"
She interrupted him. "I know what you're asking. And while yes, I loved him, I wasn't yet at the last 'stage' of bonding. It hurt to be away, yes, but it wasn't soul-crushing." Tali sniffled once more. "Not like this."
There was a pause as both of her friends digested her explanation.
Liara's loud gasp interrupted the contemplative silence. "Goddess! Look at that! It's the Normandy!"
Her companions immediately peered out the cockpit window, and sure enough, the beautiful form of the SR-2 was laid bare before them in all its shimmering glory.
"Hmmm. I wonder why it's here in the first place. Maybe Ashley was finally able to swing some time to see Shepard?"
Tali didn't respond in any discernible way. Instead, she shifted her weight back and forth on the balls of her feet, as antsy as she could ever remember being.
Ha. Almost. I still think my first time with John - "I brought some music…" - tops this. But it's close.
Ignoring the sidelong glance she got from Garrus as she continued to fidget, she thought of one more "almost".
Almost home.
John saw the other ship first. While Kasumi was still gawking at the (admittedly beautiful) sight of the Normandy, something within him told him to shift his focus up and to the right. On cue, the sleek, reflective hull of the Malinor lowered its way through the partly cloudy skies and the fair bit of mist that now hung in the air around them.
"Yeah, that's nice," he started, looking back at the Normandy before shifting his attention to the Malinor, "but I like this." He was watching intently as it got lower, and lower, until finally the ship hit reverse thrust with a hiss and settled softly onto the landing area with its landing clamps extended.
Two things happened then that Shepard was unaware of: he had begun to walk purposefully toward the ship as it landed, and Kasumi had cloaked herself once again. A victim of his purposeful walk, Shepard's cane was lying discarded on the pavement. He had no idea that he had even brought it, let alone left it. He currently had one focus, and he thought only of her.
As the hatch opened from the underside of the ship, located along its sleek "neck", three shadowed figures appeared. Shepard saw all three, but was aware of only one - the one that almost immediately began sprinting toward him as soon as the ramp touched the ground. Her long powerful legs churned mightily in a straining effort to reconnect her soul with his.
For Tali, there was almost no room for rational thought left in her brain. She was nearly completely consumed by her aching need to be with him. To that end, she increased her pace into a complete and maniacal sprint. She saw only him, heard only her soul's need to be with him, yearned to be enveloped by him.
As for Shepard, well he at least had the wherewithal to stop moving toward her and instead focused on bracing himself for the streak of violet and black that was about to crash headlong into him. With a shred of awareness, he subtly planted his right foot behind him in order to brace himself against a flying quarian that was about to -
"Tali!"
He caught her as she leapt into him, wrapping her strong legs around his waist. His left leg had buckled only in the slightest, while the weight-bearing right held up and did its job. Shepard wrapped his arms securely around her waist, pulling her tightly against him. He closed his eyes just as tightly, wanting to only focus on her, this feeling of her pressed against him.
As for his saera, well she sobbed lightly as she pressed her head into his neck while running her hands through his hair. Nothing needed to be said between them - no "I missed you"s or anything of the sort. Whatever they needed to express to each other was done so in this simple act of feeling.
Garrus and Liara had kept their relaxed and measured pace, and were well over a hundred meters from the two reconnected lovers.
"So, Liara…do you think she missed him?" He looked over at her with a sheepish turian grin.
"Yes, Garrus. What do you think gave it away?"
He snickered at Liara's reply. Delivered in her typically stoic manner, he was pretty sure that she was attempting a bit of dry humor.
He didn't mind the competition. In fact, he was all for it.
They continued to walk steadily toward Tali and Shepard, who were still locked in their embrace, when a quiet voice gave away the presence of a certain heretofore "missing" thief.
"Hi, Liara." A pause. "Hi, Garrus."
Garrus stopped immediately (along with his heart for an instant, but he would never admit to such things).
"Hello, Kasumi." Liara kept walking before looking back at them with a smirk. "Enjoy your chat, you two," she called back to them as she jogged to catch up with Shepard and Tali - who had finally recused herself from his grasp.
They greeted Liara at the sound of her footfalls.
"Hmm. No Garrus and Kasumi. I take it they're catching up?"
A soft chuckle. "Yes, you could say that, Shepard."
"Wait - Kasumi? She's here?" Tali's surprise was very evident, and she almost started to tear off to see her friend in person before Shepard firmly grabbed her arm.
"Hold on, Tali. They have a lot to catch up on. We should probably let them start."
"You knew about this, didn't you." She pressed an accusing finger to his chest in mock indignation.
He laughed. "Guilty as charged. But I only found out that she was here a couple of days ago. And about 'them'," he looked knowingly over his shoulder as they tentatively hugged each other, "about an hour ago."
"Well, it looks like they are off to a good start."
"Yeah, Liara. I agree." He looked back at them once more before placing Tali's hand in his and letting out a satisfied breath. "Good. I'd hoped as much." He looked over at Tali. "So, uh, what exactly did I miss?"
"Not now, John. I've requested the use of a conference room in the base, and I need to get an HCOSD first. But don't worry," she squeezed his hand, "it's worth the wait."
John was actually stunned.
What exactly did they find that Tali needs an HCOSD for? That's a shitload of data…
The four of them - Shepard, Tali, Liara, and Garrus - sat around the long black table in Conference Room B. The base commander was more than happy to allow them its use (again, the four of them had quite a bit of capital in the bank with which to ask favors) for as long as they needed. Kasumi was (presumably) hanging around the mess hall. Tali had explained that the information needed to be kept among as few of them as possible. She had frowned at this, but had understood the admiral's position. This was very sensitive information, and Tali's duty came first.
"So Shepard," Tali had begun timidly, "the Geth were working on our immune systems, and trying to make them stronger…so that I could…we could - well, not "we" - but quarians could -"
Mercifully, John stopped her with a gentle hand on hers, giving her a light but meaningful squeeze. "Tali, it's okay. I know that they were working on getting you out of your suit." He added the smirk to indicate that he was clearly joking.
She simply looked at him, eyes blinking comically behind her visor. "Well they were, but not in that way, you bosh'tet."
From behind them, Liara and Garrus simply looked at each other for a moment before laughing at them both.
"Right. Okay, sorry Tali. I didn't mean to get you off track there." He patted her hand before pulling his back. He thought he felt her fingers reach up slightly as he did so, but he wanted to help her stay on track. "Please, go ahead."
He watched her eyes turn to crescents as she smiled back at him.
"Right, so they were working on a number of theories to enhance and strengthen our immune systems. Obviously, you know that they had uploaded into some of our suits on Rannoch, and had seen some progress. Unfortunately, they didn't have too long to really get a lot of real data. Based on what they did get, the Geth actually thought that we could shed our suits completely…in less than two years."
That stopped Shepard in his mental tracks, and his mouth actually hung open. Tali giggled a little, then placed her hand under his jaw to close his mouth herself. He gave her a dumb smile in return.
"You're serious? Two years?" He thought that he'd misheard. He recalled the conversation that he'd had with Shala'Raan, and she had made it sound like it could have taken them decades.
They really had no idea, did they? No wonder they needed Tali to do this.
That necessity, of course, did not absolve the admirals of their shitty behavior, and the way they had treated his saera. He knew that if push came to shove, he would defend her himself - aggressively - if need be. The realization actually came as a mild surprise to him. He hadn't even thought about it, he just…knew that he would.
"With all due respect admirals, I didn't represent one of your people. I represented one of mine."
It would seem that the more things did change, the more that they did, in fact, remain the same.
"But how? What did they have in mind? Do you think you'll be able to make headway with it?"
Liara actually piped up. "Shepard, they wanted to try new immuno-boosters, gene therapy, even nanites."
Shepard's head turned on a swivel at the mention of nanites.
"Right," Tali added, "and they also wanted to make adjustments to the exposure levels - like the amount of time we would be exposed to the atmosphere, as well as how often." She paused, marveling once again at all this. "Saera," she grabbed both of John's hands earnestly, losing herself and forgetting that she was addressing the whole room, "we could walk on my homeworld, and I…you would see me. And I would hold your hand, and feel your hand and all five of your goofy fingers…and the warmth and…"
As for Shepard, he simply listened and watched her with a mix of awe, and gratitude that he could have someone feel this way about him - about them. Not for the first time, he wondered if he should take up gambling, such was his luck.
From their seats, their friends simply watched this exchange with slowly-spreading smiles pushing forward onto their faces. Garrus and Liara gave each other knowing sidelong glances, each conveying to the other how much seeing Tali and Shepard happy meant to them.
After a moment of silence, Shepard glanced back over his shoulder at them, then comically gave Tali a small smirk before ending the silence. "Hey Tal," he was barely above a whisper, "maybe we should move on, or…maybe get a room?"
Her eyes widened and looked up and over his shoulder to their friends who were both quietly laughing at them.
"Oh, keelah, I'm sorry! Let's get…uh, let's back to it." A comical pause. "Um, where was I?"
Liara gave her a hand. "Tali, I think you had just finished talking about your immune system."
Shepard knew she was giving a mildly embarrassed but grateful smile. God what he wouldn't do to see it in the flesh right this instant. It was so beautiful, so radiant.
"Right, so…moving on. Now John, this is going to be a little…odd. But we had no idea what to make of this."
She tapped a few keys on her omnitool, and the command lit up the holodisplay over the conference table.
When the image appeared, Shepard's eyes widened noticeably. He barely managed to keep his mouth shut this time. Weakly, he pointed at the image for emphasis.
"Tali, what the fuck is that?"
He was of course staring blankly at an image of Anomaly 1.4x10^7. A trident of mass relays. Again, he tried to formulate a question.
"Tali. What the fuck is that." The words had escaped his mouth almost as a statement. As if, because his initial question had gone unanswered, he rephrased it hoping for an actual answer.
Garrus finally spoke up. "Shepard, we have no clue."
He looked back at the turian before returning his uncomprehending face to Tali. "Tal, do you have any -"
"No, we have no idea either."
"Do you think the Geth built it? Could they have built it?"
She was standing at the end of the table, gesturing at the holo-display of the eerie visage of three tethered mass relays floating over the table. "I don't know, Shepard. We barely knew how the relays worked in the first place. The Geth were advanced, but to be able to do this? I don't know." She shook her head. "I don't think so."
"Where would they have even gotten them from? I can't imagine that the Reapers just decided to leave them hanging around to, what is it? 'Collect dust'?"
Shepard chuckled at Garrus's remark. "Yeah, that's about right. It doesn't make any sense."
Liara drummed her fingers on the table; she did so with a surprisingly fast rhythm. "Perhaps something happened that altered their locations? Perhaps a star went supernova and threw off gravity in that sector? Maybe making them useless or inert?"
"But that doesn't explain the configuration," Garrus had reminded her.
"Nor why the Geth were interested in it," Tali had countered.
"Nor its actual purpose." Shepard had finished off the trifecta. Liara sighed; she had known that it was just conjecture.
The whole damn thing was conjecture.
They had posited a few more theories based on what little knowledge they had before Tali decided to hit him with the big one.
"Shepard, are you ready for this?"
He looked at her dumbly. "Uh, sure?"
She tapped a few more keys, and when the image appeared, Shepard's mouth did in fact hang open.
"Tali, is that? That's the…" He looked up at her to see her regarding him with arms crossed across her chest in an absurdly proud way. As if to say "Look what I found! Isn't it neat?"
"Tali, how the fuck am I looking another Normandy?"
"Yeah, Shepard. We don't have an answer for that one, either," Garrus had replied dryly from the back.
Liara stated again that perhaps Legion had something to do with it.
"Why, that sneaky little…" Shepard trailed off once again.
Legion. You dirty little robot. Figures there was more going on than just hanging out with a bunch of organics. Well played, old friend.
Well played.
"So, was there any indication that it was completed, or…?"
His saera shook her head. "No. Maybe it's somewhere else in the files, but just glancing through while we were on their ship…well, I didn't see anything. Garrus, did you?"
He huffed. "No, not that I recall. I pulled everything I could, but I don't remember seeing anything like that. Maybe it was just a hypothetical design?"
"Yeah, maybe."
Shepard inhaled deeply before letting it in a slow breath. Just to remind him, he had contorted in a small coughing fit afterward. Tali immediately began stroking the back of his head, knowing that it didn't actually do anything for the cough, but just to remind him that she was there. He resumed once it died down.
"Okay, do you have any more surprises for me?"
She giggled before telling him that no, the surprises ended there.
"OK, good. So what's next? I presume this gets taken to your colleagues?"
Tali's eyes narrowed at their mention - particularly at how he phrased them. "Yes. That's the next step." She looked down at the table before looking into his eyes again. "And then we'll go from there, I suppose."
John looked around the room at their friends with a smile - keelah, that smile. "Well, guys. We know where we're going - back to Rannoch. Do you guys mind coming with? Just a quick jaunt to the Perseus Veil? In and out; no muss, no fuss?"
Garrus fixed his gaze on them both. "Well, you know I'll see this through. Besides, somebody has to watch Tali's back since who knows when you'll be able to do -"
With a smirk on his face, John had tapped into his biotics - this time intentionally - and lifted Garrus from his seat, holding him there. With a comically surprised expression on the turian's face, Shepard merely grinned playfully at him. Tali shook with laughter, and even Liara covered her mouth trying to hide her own giggles. John set him back down on the floor after a moment, but it was long enough to prove his point.
He was not helpless.
At least, not completely.
"Okaaay. Perhaps he's not as lame as he's led us to believe. Tali, did you know about this?"
She eyed her seara from head to toe, quietly impressed with how quickly he could bounce back from everything that he'd endured. She knew he wasn't perfect physically, and that he likely never would be. But to see him do something that would have been unthinkable just a few weeks ago? After the absolute mind-shredding trauma that he'd faced? "Keelah, no I didn't. But it's good to know that some of that is back."
John chuckled lightly. She had given his hand a light squeeze as she had said "that". Shepard had also caught the slight undertone in her voice, knew that she was smiling, and knew precisely why she was smiling and what she meant. There were times on the SR-2 when they would "experiment" with his biotics. Just how precise could he be? Could he concentrate a biotic field inside -
"So what about you, Liara? Are you game?"
Liara didn't even pause before delivering her answer. "Of course, are my friends. I will help see this through." She paused, considering. "Maybe it turns out to be nothing, and we have all gotten so dramatic over something trivial." She looked around the table. "Besides, I have not seen Rannoch in some time. I am curious to see how your people have progressed there, Tali."
"And besides," Garrus intoned, "we have to take you guys home."
Shepard smiled broadly at the mention of home. With Tali.
He looked into her eyes again, lost himself in them for a moment. It was long enough to fill him with an overwhelming sense of contentment, and if he was honest?
Confidence.
Then Liara asked a question.
"Shepard, have you been told when you're being discharged?"
He blinked a couple of times, unable to form a reaction.
Well now. That was a good question.
"Well, shit," he huffed. "That's probably a question that I should get an answer to."
By the time their meeting was over with, night had fully descended. Coupled with the fog that had already been in place, Tali and Shepard were walking hand-in-hand through an atmosphere that largely reflected their current mood. Garrus had elected to stay on board the Malinor in order to run diagnostics and calibrations (all four of his friends had rolled their eyes hard at the mention of Garrus's favorite shipboard pastime), while Liara and Kasumi elected to remain on base.
Shepard thought it strange that Garrus and Kasumi had decided not to spend more time together, but perhaps there was too much between them to simply "dive right back in" to whatever they had been before. Without the Reapers as a threat, perhaps they actually did have the most precious luxury of all on their side: time. In any case, he would not press either one of them about it. It was never his place, and he respected both of them too much to impose anything.
As for Tali and Shepard themselves, by the time that they reached the hospital, they had relinquished each other's hands and instead had arms around waists (and Tali's head resting comfortably on his shoulder) with the only sound being their footfalls alongside the muffled rubber thud of Shepard's cane in time with his every other step. Fog aside, it was a glorious winter evening in this, the rebuilding city of London.
When they finally did reach room 407, Shepard was only mildly surprised to find it already occupied by a certain former Cerberus operative; well-known for her intolerance of bullshit, admiration for a skintight suit, and now for her vital contribution to Shepard's medical recovery.
"Hey Miranda. How are you?" Shepard intoned with the positivity and exuberance for which he had been known (and with which Tali had fallen so completely in love), and until quite recently, had been largely absent.
What a relieving sound it was that filtered into Tali's ears.
Miranda had been seated in what was ostensibly Tali's chair, with her eyes glued to a datapad. She had been studying information regarding the Alliance's Special Projects division - forwarded to her by Admiral Hackett himself. She stood up, dropping the pad onto the chair that she had just vacated.
"Shepard, Tali. Welcome back." After a quick handshake with Shepard and even a hug (keelah!) for Tali, Miranda wasted no time in getting down to business. "As for how I am…we'll get to that shortly."
"Okay, you've piqued my curiosity, Miranda. What's up?"
"Well, it's good news," she started with a small smile, "for the most part, I think."
Tali and Shepard looked at each other in curiosity and a little bit of worry. "Miranda, should we sit down?"
She let out a small chuckle. "No, no. Nothing like that." She sat back down in Tali's chair while John leaned casually against the bed. His bondmate was sitting cross-legged on the bed itself. Shepard couldn't help but notice a very curious thing as she began: Miranda was fidgeting. She continued. "I guess…I came to say goodbye." Shepard had expected a dramatic pause here, but she did not give him one. He felt Tali's light squeeze on his shoulder. "It's nothing as dramatic as it sounds, you two. It's just that you're being released tomorrow, Shepard."
Both he and Tali shot each other a look that contained surprise, delight, and even…trepidation. "You mean…I'm free to go?"
Miranda let out a quiet laugh. "Yes, Shepard. I've been reviewing your latest test results with Doctor Hertz, and we're in agreement. There is nothing further we can do for you here; you are as well as we can make you." She watched him then, reading his expression, and it was one that she had expected: he was mildly fearful, yes, but there was also relief and a stern determination. "Your implants have done what they were designed to do, and I cannot tell you how pleased I am that they did the job."
"That makes three of us, Miranda," intoned the previously silent quarian.
"Yes, I suppose that does. At least three. So here's what you're going to have to deal with, Shepard: your ankle is about as good as it will get. It may strengthen over time, but it will always be one of the weaker points on your body. Your lungs are never going to be what they were." She gave him an apologetic look, like she should have done more. Shepard scoffed at the notion. "But, perhaps that is a good thing." She had looked over to Tali with a knowing look.
All three of them knew what she had meant.
"Forcing his hand" and all that.
"Aside from that, you may have some occasional pain in your shoulder, but if you keep it strengthened, it should pretty much be good to go."
A thought struck him. "You know, Miranda, I find this all a bit convenient." He smirked at her as he said this, he had an inkling that the Normandy hadn't just shown up when it had just out of happenstance.
She returned his smirk with one of her own.
Keelah, these two.
"You noticed that, did you? Thought you might have. I, uh, might have informed Admiral Hackett of your pending release. So, he might have coordinated the Normandy to arrive back at Earth at a convenient moment. Conveniently enough, I understand their next mission involves the Perseus Veil."
Tali laughed heartily, unbelievably. "You know, Miranda, I'm starting to actually like you." There was an audible playfulness in her voice.
As for Shepard? Well, he didn't know what to say.
A growing trend, it would seem.
"Are you now? I think I can live with that. Even if I am the Cerberus cheerlead-"
Shepard interrupted then. "Miranda, you haven't been Cerberus for a long time. I won't repeat what Jack might have thought of you, but I think that even she might have a different opinion of you by now."
"Hmm. Maybe. In any case, I wanted to tell you personally about this." She stood up, datapad in hand. "So what next for you two? Rannoch, I presume, on a relatively permanent basis?"
Shepard gave Tali a loving look as a smile spread across his face. "Yes, to Rannoch. I think it'll be nice."
"'Think it will be nice'? That's the best you've got, you bosh'tet?" The angry quarian leaned forward and punched him in the shoulder. "John, it's going to be wonderful."
He groaned in mock annoyance while they fell into a fit of laughter.
"God, okay. Seriously, I can't wait." He let out a deep breath. "Miranda, do you think it's strange that I'm nervous about this? That…since the war is over…I'm kinda guessing now?"
Tali gave him a sympathetic squeeze before leaning in and wrapping her arms around his right arm as she rested her head on his shoulder. She softly spoke before Miranda could. "No John, I don't. I think we're both - maybe all of us - facing the same problem."
The former Cerberus agent simply nodded her agreement. Then no one said anything for a bit; it was true of course. And it gave them pause.
Shepard asked the next question. "So what about you? Freelancing it?"
She shook her head. "No…I, uh, actually have something lined up." Shepard cocked an eyebrow in curiosity. "Yeah, it's actually with the Alliance. Admiral Hackett again. He offered me a position overseeing the Alliance's Special Projects division." She shrugged. "I said 'yes'."
Tali smiled at this. "Oh Miranda, that's great!" She paused. "You're not going to be installing any VIs in anyone yet…are you?"
Shepard huffed a small laugh while Miranda simply smirked before responding coyly. "I'm not at liberty to say, Tali."
"That's good, Miranda. I'm happy for you. Anything else?"
She let out a deep breath. "I'm actually going to…well…" Shepard was confused. It was not often when Miranda was at a loss for words. "They're…well, Oriana is coming here. To Earth. To stay with me, at least for a little while." She sighed in what appeared to be nervousness. It looked so completely…foreign on her.
"How is she, Miranda? Is everything okay?"
"Oh yes, she's okay. We've been talking for the past couple of weeks, and I just…after the war, I didn't see a point in not being in her life - to at least get to know her." She thought for a moment. "Does that make any sense, Shepard?"
The half smirk returned. "Yeah. I think it does. War…changes people, and this one in particular did a real number on a lot of us." Tali was acutely aware of his tone of voice, and knew that he had meant himself in particular. She tightened her grip on his arm. "It alters perspectives and…priorities. And without the looming fear of death - and in your case, your father as well - hanging over everyone, maybe we can all get back to living, instead of simply trying not to die."
They chatted idly for a while, discussing what it might mean to do something more than simply "trying not to die", until all three were yawning in earnest.
Miranda stood up, smoothing out her jumpsuit as usual - the "Miranda Maneuver", as it were. Whe
"Shepard, I can't…I can't thank you enough. For everything." The recently retired admiral blushed. "I'm serious, Shepard. You changed all of us. You changed me. And I'll never forget it." She turned to Tali next. "And Tali, thank you for being patient with me. And for not giving him," she nodded in Shepard's direction, "that grenade."
It was Tali's turn to blush. She would likely never get used to a Miranda that she actually liked. "Miranda, I meant what I said when I first came up here. I was thankful for you then, I am eternally grateful for you now. By bringing him back," still fidgeting, she looked down at the bed that she sat upon, "you brought me back, too."
It was more of an admission than any of them would have expected from her - including the woman who made it.
And then the hugs began.
Keelah, Tali thought, I am actually going to miss this woman.