A/N: Another chapter woohoo! Also I want to thank everyone for leaving comments and adding this story to their favourites or just following, I appreciate it very much!

I hope you like this chapter, enjoy ^^

The weather had become drowsier. Autumn had come and so did the rain, accompanying colder temperatures. Students who were clever or didn't have to go outside stayed indoors. That couldn't be said, however, for people on the quidditch team.

It was late when the Gryffindor quidditch team made it back to Gryffindor Tower, Hermione and Remus practically the only ones still up. They each had claimed a couch for themselves, stretching out on it, relaxed.

The team entered the room and immediately Sirius flung himself on her, lying on top of her. She shrieked out of surprise, almost throwing her book across the room. "What are you doing?"

"I'm tired. James was brutal today, absolutely sadistic."

"And that's a reason to crush me, why?"

"Because I need to be comforted for the way I suffered out there on the pitch. So comfort me, Mione."

"After you take a shower, you smell." He huffed, shuffling on top of her, crushing her a little more. She laughed. "I mean it, you reek of sweat."

"Ugh, fine." And he stood up, ready to go shower and put on a change of clothes.

After he had left, she turned to Remus. "I sometimes wonder if his animagus side influences his human side. I could swear at times that he is more dog than human."

Remus laughed, shaking his head. "I'm glad I'm not the only one who noticed," he said jokingly.

Not twenty minutes later Sirius was back downstairs and had her back in his grip. "Sirius, why didn't you just go to bed if you're this tired?"

"Because." The word came out a little slurred. She could only chuckle and let him be. Eventually, she managed to send him upstairs, Remus following after him. It was too late already, no need to make it even later.

Several days later she was called to Dumbledore's office. "Miss Granger, please take a seat. I have news for you. It's connected to the Order."

"Yes, sir?"

"After a lot of discussing the Order has decided that you may join after you graduate from Hogwarts." There was a small pause. "But I have to inform you. You do know that it is dangerous to join us? You may get hurt. You may even be killed. Have you considered this? Are you absolutely certain you still want to join, knowing this?"

"With all due respect, Sir. But I knew what I was getting myself into from the moment I decided to help the Order. I've been fighting alongside my friends for years. I've been hurt, have seen people die and I almost died myself a few times. I know what it entails to be part of the Order, to fight against Voldemort."

He looked at her, observed her. She was speaking the truth. She had indeed seen a lot in the few short years she had walked the earth. "As long as everything is clear and you are certain, there are no problems." She nodded.

They worked out a plan of when she would give information, thought about when it was needed to give him information. They thought about how she should give it, piece by piece or everything at once. They decided to wait a while longer before making a definite decision, wanting to see how things developed during the next couple of months before deciding to take action.

Then came the first quidditch game of the season: Gryffindor against Slytherin. The weather was just absolutely horrid: it was raining like never before, the sky so dark you hardly saw anything and it was cold, very cold.

The Gryffindor team gave it their all but it wasn't meant to be. The awful weather conditions combined with the cunning and cheating abilities of the Slytherin team resulted in a loss for Gryffindor. The atmosphere in the common room that night was gloomier and filled with more disappointment than was expected. Instead of a party, everyone was doing their own thing, the boys of the quidditch team still feeling upset about losing.

"Come on, guys," Hermione told them. "It's just a game. Nothing's lost yet. No reason to feel upset about anything." She was trying to cheer them up, letting them know that it wasn't a big deal.

"We lost against Slytherin, of course it's a big deal."

"It's only a big deal when you make it so. Don't waste too much energy thinking about that. What happened, happened."

"Easy for you to say. You don't know what it feels like to lose to someone like Slyhterin, especially after all the hours and days on end we spend practicing," Sirius snapped, his anger getting the best of him once again.

"Okay, no need to snap like that." Her lips were drawn in a thin line. "I was just trying to make you feel better."

"Well don't! It's already bad enough that we lost, there's no need for you to try and 'make us feel better' by saying that the game was not even important."

"But it really isn't a big deal. It was just the first match, you still have enough chances of winning."

"Of course it's no big deal to you. The only thing that matters to you is your freaking books and the marks you get on your tests! Merlin forbid anything else could be important. You have no idea what it feels like to lose something that is important to you."

The common room was quiet, silence falling over the room after his outburst. She took a tiny step back, willing her voice to stay calm as she replied. "I know all too well what it is like to lose something important, thank you very much. But fine, if you don't need me then I'll leave so you can wallow in your anger alone." Her voice was calm, steady, her eyes were cold. With that being said, she left the common room.

She needed a place where she could be alone, a place where no one would find her. After only a second she knew where to go. The room of requirement. She needed to go to the room of requirement. Nobody would find her there.

When she entered the room, her breath left her. It looked just like her bedroom back at home. The same bed, the same wallpaper, pictures of her parents and friends lining the walls. She crumbled down.

A sob wrecked through her body, her shoulders shaking, the tears flowing out of her eyes. She managed to drag herself onto her bed and grabbed a pillow, clutching it to her chest, smelling it. And though it looked like home, it didn't smell like it. It was sterile, no scent at all to be detected. More sobs left her.

How could he tell her that? How could he tell her that she didn't know what it was like to lose something important? He had no idea! She had lost everything! She had lost her parents, her friends, even her time was not hers. Everything was just gone.

Oh, how she missed everyone. Her parents who would look after her, take care of her, smile at her, be proud of her. Harry, Ron, Ginny, Fred and George. She even missed their stupid, stupid pranks. She knew everything about Hogwarts so she knew what the room of requirement could and couldn't do. And now she cursed the fact that the room couldn't create people, couldn't bring people to her. What she would give to see them all again.

Everything was too much, too overwhelming. Every emotion came crashing to the surface, every emotion she had kept inside for the past year. Too many thoughts, too many emotions, the sobs wrecked her body.

She crashed.

Finally, sometime after she had stopped crying – only because she had no tears left to spill – she had fallen asleep, drained, exhausted.

And while Hermione let everything out, the boys were talking in the common room, having no idea of what she was going through.

"Padfoot, don't you think you went a little too far?"

"Don't start with me, Moony. It's enough that one person is butting in, I don't need a second one doing the same." Remus raised an eyebrow, not impressed with his friend right now. Sirius couldn't help it. He was just so angry at the loss, so disappointed. And he got that she wanted to cheer them up, he really did. But it was not the freaking time.

"Pads, I like it as much as you that we lost but Hermione didn't do anything wrong. You didn't have to lash out like that."

"Just leave it, Prongs," he huffed. "I'll apologize when she comes back later tonight."

"You better. I don't want a repeat of last year, that was just plain awful."

"Me neither." And as he said it he realized just how much he meant it. It had been horrible not being able to talk to her. And he realized he shouldn't have lashed out, but his temper had just got the better of him. Again. When she'd come back later that night, he would apologize.

But she didn't come back. They waited and waited, hours passed but no Hermione.

"Where is she?" Sirius was getting impatient – and slightly worried – that the brunette still wasn't back.

"How would I know?"

"Calm down, Padfoot. It's not like she has many places she can go to."

So they waited and waited a little more until he was tired of it. Where was she? "The map. I'll go get the map." And he was off, running up the stairs. "Guys," he said as he made his way back to the couch, map open in his hands. "I can't find her."

"What do you mean you can't find her?"

"Exactly what I said, I can't find her. She's not on the map."

"You must be wrong. She has to be on it. The map never lies."

"Then you look and see if you can find her," Sirius said as he shoved the map in James' hands. They all bent over the piece of parchment, looking for the brunette's name. However, they couldn't find her.

"Why isn't she on here?" Remus asked, confused.

"See, I told you she wasn't on there."

"But then where is she? She can't have left the castle, right?" Peter asked.

A feeling settled in Sirius' chest. It was almost something akin to panic but worse. It settled in his chest and constricted around his heart. She couldn't have left the castle, right? Right? 'If you don't need me then I'll leave.' That's what she had said. She hadn't actually left, right? She wouldn't just leave him, right?

"No, Dumbledore would know if she had left. And I don't think he would even allow her to leave."

"But then where is she? Why isn't she showing up on the map?"

"I don't know. But I bet she's just somewhere in the castle. She probably just wanted to be alone for a while."

"That still doesn't explain why she isn't showing up on the map."

"I know, but it's not like I know why that is."

They decided to let it be, see when she would come back. If she wasn't back in the morning they would go to Dumbledore. In the meantime they decided to head to bed, it being past two in the morning. It was not like they could do anything anyway to try and find her if her name didn't show on the map. By the time they would have searched through the entire castle, she would probably show up by herself anyway.

That didn't mean though that the feeling in Sirius' chest had settled down or vanished. He couldn't shake it off, it was tangled around his heart and his lungs. He didn't sleep a wink that night, concerned about Hermione. Where was she? Why didn't the map show her name? She hadn't left, right?