Chapter 26 – Confrontations

DISCLAIMER: We do not own Star Wars or any of the characters in it, though we wish we did. xD

Author's Note: In which Ahsoka talks to Barriss and Anakin and Padme have a long overdue conversation. :P

I'm sorry, but I won't be able to release chapter 27 until August 1st... It'll be a flashback of moments in Anakin and Padme's relationship. :)

~ Amina Gila

Anakin steps forward, passing Rotta to Jabba and acting as if it's his great pleasure to do so. "You have my thanks, Count Dooku, for returning my son safely to me," Jabba declares. "I am willing to discuss the terms of the treaty between the Hutt clan and the Separatist Alliance."

Padme's horror echoes sharply into the Force, and Anakin winces. Again, this is his fault. "Jabba, Count Dooku is deceiving you!" she exclaims, stepping forwards. "He is the one who kidnapped your son. He is doing this for himself, not for you. The Jedi would never kidnap your son. You must understand this!"

"Leave my presence," orders Jabba harshly, and Anakin lets his fury mount at the dismissive way the Hutt is speaking to Anakin's fiancée. "You are not welcome on Tatooine."

"This is wrong!" protests Padme, totally ignoring the command.

"It would be best that you depart," Dooku cautions her, and she gives him a scathing look.

"You must have been complicit in the kidnapping," Jabba accuses. "You will not leave this planet alive."

Anakin freezes hardly able to quell his rising panic when guards approach Padme, clearly planning to take her into custody. "No!" he blurts out desperately, stepping forwards. "She – The Senator would never go along with something like that. The Jedi have deceived her, just as they have tried to harm you." He can feel Dooku's gaze on him but refuses to look away from the Hutt. He will not allow anything to befall Padme. He will break her free if he must.

"Very well," Jabba decides after a long, tentative silence. "Take her out of my sight."

"Wait for me outside, Anakin," Dooku instructs him. "I need to finish negotiating with Jabba."

Anakin nods, turning to look at Padme for the first time. She's staring at him, eyes filled with distrust and uncertainty, and it breaks his heart. Even on Geonosis, when she'd first realized that he lied about his training, she had never looked at him this way. He doesn't say anything to try and justify himself. He doesn't even know what he could say. Instead, he motions for her to follow him. She does, and they leave the room, slipping through the beings towards the entrance.

"I don't know what's going on with you, Anakin Skywalker," Padme suddenly says, voice filled with a fierce determination, "But you are going to tell me now. We are going to my ship, and we are going to discuss this like adults. Do you understand?"

"Yes," he manages to reply, everything in him screaming at the wrongness of this. Padme isn't supposed to treat him this way. She's not supposed to order him around like this. He knows that he deserves no less but thinking it and experiencing it are totally different. Force, he doesn't think he can do this. He can't tell her the truth, so he doesn't know what he even can say. He'll have to stick to the official story, obviously, but – but she'll know if he's lying or hiding things. Yes, he's a skilled actor, but this is Padme. How can he pretend in front of her when she'll be questioning everything?

He knows that Sidious would tell him to kill her because she's a liability. He'll never do that, so that only other option would be to capture her. But… he won't do that to her. Obi-Wan and Ahsoka were different since they were Jedi. Padme is a Senator; her life's work is being a politician, and he can't take that away from her without warning. They'd already agreed that she wouldn't have to give up her position in the Senate after marrying. So, that means that he'll have to fool her. Somehow. Why did he ever think this was a good idea? Because he loves her. He'll get through this because he doesn't have a choice.

**w**

Ahsoka is decidedly uncomfortable at being stuck out here with Barriss, and she can't stop herself from fidgeting or shifting around. She blames part of it on the suns which are beating down on her. She pulled up her hood, but there's only so much it can do against the oppressive heat. "Ugh, it's so hot here," she grumbles under her breath.

Barriss huffs out something which sounds like a laugh. "Get used to it," she advices, voice stone cold and devoid of any sympathy.

Ahsoka feels as if her former friend was laughing at her misery more than because of the comment. It stings to see what she's become, and it's even worse to know that she could have been the same if not for Anakin's constant presence and support. But still, she takes it in stride, acting as if she doesn't really care for Barriss' opinion. She rolls her shoulders nonchalantly. "Why? Are you planning to move here?"

The former Jedi scoffs. "I will if my master commands it," she answers dutifully as if reading a script. It nearly makes Ahsoka cringe. She wants to scream and ask her how she can act like this towards the Sith Master who commanded her captured and broken. She doesn't.

"Luckily for you, that won't be necessary, I'm sure," Ahsoka comments, still carefully keeping her voice casual and detached.

Barriss says nothing, clearly choosing to remain silent and at attention. Ahsoka has so many questions for her, but there's almost nothing she can ask without crossing the line and potentially getting in trouble. Finally, she can't take the silence anymore, and the conflicted, dark emotions filtering through her bond with Anakin are worrying her. "So, what made you see the truth and choose the Dark Side?" she wants to know. Barriss looks at her, something resembling distain in her sickly yellow eyes. "What?" demands Ahsoka crossly. "I thought that it was a Sith thing to boast about choices and power."

"Maybe some things shouldn't be shared," points out Barriss mulishly, "And don't forget, that only the strongest will survive."

Ahsoka narrows her eyes. She's fairly sure that was a threat but forces a laugh anyways. "Well, you and I both know that Anakin is far stronger than we are. Staying on his good side is the only way to survive then."

Barriss seems ready to debate that, but finally shrugs. "You asked why I realized that the Dark Side is the only way? I'll tell you then. I saw the future," she elaborates, narrowing her eyes. "I saw the Jedi destroyed when their own fear consumed them. That's when I realized that they had lost their way, that the only way to stop them from destroying the galaxy was the Dark Side."

Ahsoka swallows, knowing that whatever her friend may have seen was a product of the Sith mask playing on her fears, many of which were likely inspired by Anakin's words. She desperately wants to find a way to assure Barriss that they can fix things together, but if she's not careful she'll be in for a world of trouble and pain. Maybe Anakin is right. Maybe Barriss currently is too deep into the Dark Side to listen to reason. She doesn't want to wait, but she may not have a choice.

"My reasons for choosing the Dark Side were not nearly as noble as your own," she finally admits with a half-smile. "I chose it because it gave me the power I needed to survive. I don't regret it," she adds fiercely.

"And why should you?" Barriss queries mildly, shaking her head. "You're here, serving our master. You want nothing more than to ensure that his vision becomes reality."

Something cold twists in Ahsoka's gut. It takes her a moment to recognize it as apprehension mingled with dread. It's just as she suspected. Barriss is loyal to Sidious, not them. For now, she had best drop this. She doesn't have long to consider her next course of action – it will be dreadfully uncomfortable to stand here in complete silence – when a Jedi starfighter comes swooping down to land a distance away from them. Somehow, Ahsoka isn't surprised to see Master Tachi emerge, leaping to the ground and striding resolutely towards them.

"We cannot let her inside," Ahsoka murmurs to Barriss, who nods. They shift so as to block her path towards the entrance.

She pauses, looking between them, a mixture of confusion and sadness in her gaze. "You don't have to do this," she tells them quietly.

"That is where you are wrong, Master Jedi," Barriss retorts coldly. "I have seen the truth. The Jedi are failing. No, they have already failed. The only way is through the Dark Side."

If Ahsoka lets her continue, she knows that the former Jedi will continue spouting Sith dogma to which she has no desire to listen. "The Huttlet is safe," she interrupts calmly, "And we will not let you through to assassinate Jabba as well. You have failed, so give up."

Siri seems taken aback, but she recovers quickly. "I am not here for Jabba, and you know it. I'm not here to talk to him either." Ahsoka had suspected that, but it's good to have the confirmation. "I am actually here because Senator Amidala is on Tatooine. I am to escort her back to Coruscant and ensure her safety."

Barriss remains firm. "If she is here, it is because she is part of the plot. We will take her into custody and deal with her as we see fit."

Ahsoka shakes her head at Barriss. "The Senator is inside," she informs Siri, "But I am afraid that I cannot let you pass. You will have to wait out here." She lets her hands fall to the hilts of her lightsabers in a clear, albeit subtle, warning that she will resort to violence if necessary.

Siri wavers when a noise behind them draws Ahsoka's attention. She turns to see Anakin walking out of the palace following Padme, who looks absolutely furious. She can't help but wince on his behalf. "Senator!" calls Siri, "I'm here to escort you back to Coruscant."

Padme pauses, giving her a look, before nodding. "I will be ready to leave momentarily," she assures the Jedi Master with a smile that is obviously fake. "I was going to have a word with Anakin before we depart."

Siri hesitates, frowning. "I don't think it's safe," she argues. "He's… dangerous."

Anakin glares at her, the fear and misery which Ahsoka could sense through their bond being replaced with a burning anger. His head snaps towards her, eyes glowing yellow. "Hold your tongue, Jedi," he spits. If looks could kill, Ahsoka would bet that Siri would have long since ceased to exist. As it is, Anakin seems to be about two seconds from killing her simply for existing. Ahsoka can't really blame him. This must be hard for him, seeing his fiancée, with whom he is clearly enamored, but being unable to actually love her, to tell her the truth.

Siri raises an eyebrow, looking completely unimpressed. "That's what I mean."

He takes a step towards her, clearly intent on inflicting serious bodily harm, and Ahsoka isn't about to stop him. "Anakin," snaps Padme, and he stills, though he doesn't turn towards her. "Leave her alone."

If anything, that only fuels his rage, and he's lost control over it to the point where Ahsoka can almost feel the air vibrating around him. She can deal with him when he's depressed, when he's cold and calculating, but this is totally different. She moves towards him slowly and deliberately, making sure that he's aware of her approach and holds up her hands to help calm him. While she doesn't know how to help, she can at least give him one reassurance. "I won't leave you, Anakin," she vows. "Not this time. Not ever."

Their eyes lock, and Ahsoka can see him struggling to reign himself in. Much as she'd love to hug him, she doesn't think it would be a good idea given their present audience. He finally closes his eyes and sucks in a slow, deep breath. When he looks at her again, the yellow has receded, though she can see it lurking in the depths of his gaze. Then, he turns to Padme. "Let's go," he says, tone clipped. Ahsoka watches them leave, disappearing onto Padme's ship and hopes that this isn't going to end in a disaster.

**w**

It's all Anakin can do to keep himself together as Padme motions for him to sit in a chair at the small table in her starship. He does, though he forces himself to act normal and not simply collapse into it like he wants to. She sits down opposite him, face a cold mask of anger and hurt. It's all his fault. He's hurt her, and he doesn't deserve her forgiveness for betraying her like this.

"I want answers," she states flatly, "But somehow, I don't think you're going to tell me anything unless I ask. So, is that how it's going to be?" She seems… almost disappointed, and he doesn't know how to respond to that. His mind is short-circuiting, and all he can do is nod. "Okay. What were you doing with Count Dooku?" She says the name with no small amount of loathing which he can understand, but he still hates it.

"I was helping him," Anakin answers, breathing a little more easily. "I heard that Rotta was kidnapped by a Jedi, so I offered him my assistance."

"And I suppose that you've been collecting a band of Jedi to help you," she replies sarcastically. "I know Barriss Offee was captured by the Separatists, and she was there along with Ahsoka. So, let me rephrase: where are your loyalties?"

Anakin breathes out slowly. He can do this. He has to do this. If he sticks to the story, it will – hopefully – be fine. "I think you know that, while I support the Republic, I do not agree with everything they are doing. And I certainly harbor no love for the Jedi. Their actions have done them no credit, and this most recent act of kidnapping Jabba's son wins them no favor in my eyes." He's pleased at how reasonable he's able to sound, but he won't get his hopes up too fast. Padme is clever, and he'd better not underestimate her.

She raises an eyebrow. "I think you and I both know that the Jedi were not involved. In fact, I tend to believe that either Ahsoka or Barriss was put up to it which begs the question: why are you helping him?"

"He asked for my help," Anakin reiterates.

"So, does that mean that if I ask for your help, you will help the Republic?" she asks. "That's what I thought. I don't understand why you're doing this, Anakin. The Chancellor has given you… a home, a place to live after the Jedi Council refused to train you."

A bitter laugh escapes him before he can stop it. "I never asked for his help," he spits before he can prevent himself, the helpless rage and fear surging up to drown him. He belatedly realizes that everything around them is shaking, and he sucks in a sharp breath, trying to calm himself. "I would like to think you would have offered the same if he had not," he adds, voice carefully devoid of emotion.

Padme hesitates before deflating. "Yes," she agrees, "I would have." She studies him as though she's never seen him before, dark brown eyes thoughtful. He wants to hug her and never let go, but he's not being given that luxury.

"What is your relationship with Dooku? I want the truth." She stares at him, a stubborn defiance in her gaze, and he knows that she won't stop until she's satisfied.

It takes immense willpower to keep himself together, even when the only thing he wants to do is fall apart and let someone else put him back together again. He's tired of the lying, the constant hiding. He can't give her the full truth, but he can give her some of it. He owes her that much, at least. "He trained me," he responds carefully. "He taught me how to use the Force, how to defend myself."

"So, he's your… what? Master? Sith master?" she queries.

"The correct term would be master," he answers, which, of course, is the truth from a certain point of view. Dooku is so much more to him than a master. He's a confident, an ally, a friend. More than that, he's like Anakin's grandfather.

"Are you a Sith?" Padme finally questions bluntly.

He looks up at her from his pointless study of the table in front of him and meets her eyes. "Yes. Does that scare you?"

"It should, but it doesn't," she admits, shaking her head with a sigh. "I'm worried about you, Anakin. I don't know what you've gotten yourself into, and you're not talking to me. This is not how relationships work, you know."

He knows. He knows it much more than she'll realize. "I can't talk about it," he settles on, clenching his mechanical hand hard enough that the gears squeal in protest. "Besides, my situation hardly matters." She opens her mouth to protest, but he holds up a hand to quiet her. "Angel, the Jedi won't care who I am or what I have – or haven't – done. They'll see a Sith, and they'll kill me. They killed Jango simply for existing. He was wounded. He couldn't even fight back, and they killed him."

Her brow furrows. "He was a bounty hunter. He knew the risks."

"Then let me rephrase that. Jango was murdered in front of his son," Anakin explains, "And I know I did something I shouldn't have, but I can't undo what I've done. I'm helping Dooku because I can't be part of the Republic anymore." It's not the truth, but it's close enough. "The choice is no longer in my hands."

"You always have a choice," she replies quietly, a shadow of sadness in her eyes.

"No, Padme, I don't." He shakes his head slowly, flattening his hands on the table. "Perhaps I could make a different choice and return to Coruscant with you, but if I did that, I would be too dead to regret it." He's not talking about the Jedi. He's talking about Sidious, not that she knows that. But she can, no doubt, sense his sincerity.

She straightens suddenly. "This is goodbye then," she states flatly. "I cannot, in good conscience, remain in contact with you if you are willing to actively aid the enemy who, might I remind you, wants me dead." More than you'll ever know. You're looking for him in all the wrong places.

He smiles, though there's no humor in it. "Then consider this my attempt to protect you," he suggests, swallowing and trying to hold back tears which suddenly threaten, the desperation and hopelessness threatening to consume him.

"I don't see how you're protecting me by staying with Dooku," she comments dryly.

"Not just you then," he amends, "But Obi-Wan and Ahsoka too."

"That I might find a little more believable," she agrees.

Finally mustering the courage, he asks the question he's been wondering the whole time. "We're engaged. What – what of that?"

"I might regret this, but I don't intend to break our commitment if you don't." Padme reaches out, resting her hand on top of his left one, and he stills at the contact. It's been so long since he was able to touch her, to hold her. Her presence has always calmed him, and he's been bereft of it for so long that her sudden nearness is making him lose control. Slowly, he turns his hand over, taking her hand in his own.

"I don't," he whispers. "I couldn't."

She smiles slightly, and he can feel her sadness as strongly as he can see it. "What do you want?" she inquires. "I don't mean about the war either."

It seems like it should be an easy question, but it's really not. In fact, it's probably one of the hardest questions he's ever had to answer. He knows, of course, in concept, but he can't quite figure out how to put it into words, and another, smaller part of him doesn't know why it even matters. It's never mattered before. Except, a voice whispers, when you wanted to be with Padme, and she wanted the same thing.

"I – I want to be with you," he confesses, voice barely above a whisper, unable to meet her eyes. "I want everyone to be safe. I want to have a family." By everyone he, of course, means his mother, Obi-Wan, Ahsoka, Dooku, Asajj, Boba, Rex, and all the other clones who have been staying on Serenno. He wants it all to end. He doesn't want to keep living like this.

"Me too," Padme murmurs, rising and gently tugging on his hand until he stands as well. She steps forwards until there is only a couple feet between them. "I don't know what's going on with you, Ani, but I'm going to figure it out." She reaches up, running her fingers through his hair, and he shudders at the familiar sensation, arms automatically wrapping around her and pulling her against him.

She hugs him in return, resting her head against his chest, and Anakin can't prevent the tears from flooding his eyes. "Why can't it always be like this?" He doesn't know why he said it, but the abject misery he's feeling is readily audible.

"You can come back with me," Padme tells him. "My offer still stands."

"You know I can't, Angel," he replies, and she pulls back enough to look at him, her expression sad.

"There are many things which I'm willing to do for you but having a continued relationship and contact with a… Separatist is not one of them." She sounds genuinely regretful, and he thinks that she probably is. For a moment, he expects her to pull away, but instead, she leans up to kiss him. He responds desperately, silently pleading that she does not have to leave, because he can feel that she's saying goodbye. Until the war is over, he'll never be able to interact with her again this way, and he hates it.

Finally, he rests his forehead against hers, not even making an attempt to wipe away his tears which flow unchecked. "Goodbye, Anakin," she whispers, and he can hear her pain as if it's his own. "I hope that, when the war is over, we'll be able to piece something back together."

"Me too," he answers just as quietly, choking back a sob and pulling back. The longer he drags this out, the harder it's going to be. "I don't think you have any idea how much I wish this could be different," he adds before slipping away, not giving her time to reply. Padme is still alive, but for the moment, she's lost to him, and he doesn't know how to even begin coping with the grief.