A/N: This chapter follows directly on the heels of the last with Severus and Lily making some plans for the future, and their first proper date. Lily provides more of her insights into her previous relationship with James, and Severus, eager to not replicate his mistakes, listens intently.

Chapter 10 Growth and Understanding

Severus woke up the following entirely aware of how everything had changed between he and Lily. Waking long before Lily at a pre-dawn hour, Severus went about his morning rounds bright and early, pushing his entire schedule forwards by an hour to have some time to himself. Spending some time alone with his birds worked wonders for Severus with putting his mind at rest. He met with Frank at the flock leader's hilltop and then personally fed all six members of the senior flock their breakfast. He made sure to leave a note for the rangers at their lodge that the senior birds had already been fed and that they need only feed and release the juniors from the stable. Severus apparated back to farmhouse after leaving the note, popping into existence on the front porch. He brushed the dust and dirt off his clothes before reaching for the handle and entering the house. No sooner had he stepped through the doorframe did the telltale crackle of oil in a pan, and the pervasive scent of brewing coffee assault his nostrils. Removing his hat and boots in the foyer in exchange for slippers, Severus headed for the kitchen.

Lily was sat at the kitchen table with a newspaper propped open in front of her, all the while, Poesy was working her house elf magic to prepare their breakfast, a pair of floating pans and a brewing pot of coffee showing as such. As Severus entered, Lily lowered her newspaper and greeted him with a smile, one he readily returned.

"Good morning," she muttered, trying and failing to keep her fatigue out of her voice.

Severus frowned slightly at hearing her tone. "You didn't sleep well?"

Lily bit back a grimace and nodded. "Not really," she admitted. "Though…I'm fairly certain I know why…" she added coyly.

Severus resisted the urge to chuckle and moved to sit down across from her in his usual spot. "What's in the news?" he asked, nodding at the paper.

Lily smiled faintly at that and flipped the paper around to show him. "There's a Space Shuttle launch coming up, this—erm, Challenger, is supposedly going into orbit on the thirtieth of October," she said, pointing at the article.

Severus poured them out two glasses of water, then nodded. "Hmm...yeah, I'd heard that on the radio the other day," said Severus.

Lily mouthed a 'thank you' as she accepted her glass and drained a big gulp. "That's what the article said," she replied. "And I've been meaning to ask…one of these days, doesn't even have to be this year…but would you be interested in ever seeing one of those launches live?"

Severus raised a brow at that. "A space shuttle launch?"

She nodded eagerly, her eyes brightening significantly. "Yeah. I figured it might be something the kids might like…and if I'm being honest, I know it's something I'd enjoy. I've always wanted to see one ever since we were kids."

That was news to Severus and he made no attempt to disguise the fact. "I never knew that."

Lily smiled shyly and tucked a few stray locks of auburn hair behind her ear. "Yeah, well…girls weren't supposed to like spaceflight, you know? That was very much a boys thing, so imagine I let slip that I wanted to be an astronaut, that wouldn't have gone over well."

"Sally Ride is an astronaut," Severus pointed out. "And she's not that much older than us, is she?"

Lily's lip twitched upwards into a surprised smile, a thin brow lifted in a perfect arch of intrigue. "You know who Sally Ride is?"

"She was the talk of the town, rather, the country, when she traveled to space. And of course, it made national headlines," Severus replied, indulging Lily with a smirk.

All of a sudden, their food appeared in front of them courtesy of Poesy, who then excused herself with a bow after Lily and Severus expressed their thanks.

"As I was saying, she made headlines, so I'd have to have had my head in the sand to not have heard of her."

Lily ladled some beans on to her plate, and then with a wave of her hand, she levitated the bowl of beans over to Severus. Severus raised a brow at the sight.

"You've been working on your wandless magic," he observed, receiving the bowl and setting it down.

"It's incredibly useful in combat," Lily said nonchalantly. "After all…an opponent that can still fight without a wand was a rare commodity on both sides of the war," she said with a hint of pride.

"Are you bragging?"

Lily's eyes flickered and her lip curled just a bit higher. "Well, of course. I can count on one hand the number of people on my side that can fight without a wand, I think it is something I'm entitled to brag ab—"

She cut her sentence short half-way as Severus levitated the bowl of eggs from his side of the table, to her, also without speaking. Lily couldn't help but grin as she received said bowl.

"My, my…I'm impressed Severus," Lily said with faux-mockery, then helping herself to said eggs.

"I've been practicing," he acknowledged.

The truth of the matter was that he'd practiced an awful lot in order to develop that skill. There were some areas of magic that came easy to him, like casting various hexes, or potion-brewing, but other such as wandless magic that were all but easy. Lily, on the other hand, was perhaps the only person he knew who could claim that wandless magic was 'easy', having been proficient at it since her pre-Hogwarts days.

"I've never really had to practice it much," Lily remarked truthfully, though with a hint of smugness. "I guess it just comes naturally to me."

"Yeah, well, not all of us are like that," said Severus.

Lily could attest to that wholly, she'd tried to teach other Order members how to utilize wandless magic, and not many of them had been successful at it. Out of the lot, only Edgar Bones had some success, and he brought his success with him to the grave in 1980 when he and his family were killed. When she tried teaching James, Sirius, Remus and Peter, all four boys crashed and burned in their efforts to learn; leading Lily to believe that there must be some form of prerequisite required to learning the skill, something that she, and perhaps Bones possessed that the others didn't. When she asked Dumbledore about it, who also just so happened to be the best wandless-magic practitioner in Britain, he claimed that one must be incredibly attuned with their spirit in order to make it work, and that was likely the reason so few other than himself and Lily could grasp the skill. Evidently, Severus was quite attuned with his magic as well, maybe not as much as Dumbledore, or even Lily for that matter, but he still held a good grasp of his magic nonetheless.

"Hmm…" Lily hummed. "So, what's the plan for today?"

Severus took a moment to swallow his mouthful of food, then another to wipe at his mouth with a serviette. "Nothing much, really. I suppose we could head into town if you're feeling up for it, or we could just lounge around here, too. I haven't got much on my plate for today so…I'm game for almost anything."

"How about we have lunch in town, then?" Lily suggested, before reaching for her mug of coffee.

Severus nodded readily in assent. "Sounds good to me. There's a place I've been meaning to try but've kept putting off," he answered, smiling. "Would you be interested?"

"Count me in," Lily replied.

They quietly went about their business for the rest of the morning, and come noon, they prepared to set off for town in Severus' Mustang. Severus was waiting for Lily on the front porch when the front door swung open and out came Lily. His brow arched in surprise at her attire, Lily noticing in and smiling in response. Ever since she'd come to Arizona, Lily usually tended to dress practically, something Severus also subscribed to on a daily basis; so seeing her looking more dressed up now came as quite the surprise to him. Wearing whitewashed, high-waisted jeans with a blue, smart-looking, button-down blouse tucked in, Lily definitely looked eye-catching to Severus, something her smirk told him she was going for. She held out her hand for him, and he grasped it, pressing a kiss to her knuckles.

"You look good," Severus said truthfully, eliciting a smile.

"As do you," Lily replied, giving his checkered shirt and white Bermudas a once-over. "Shall we?"

Severus nodded, and the two made straight for the Mustang and set off towards town. The drive into town was spent mostly in silence, though the two friends made sporadic conversation here and there. They arrived on main street, Severus parking the car just opposite to the restaurant. From the looks of things, it was a Thai restaurant, leaving Lily more than a bit surprised that this was the place Severus was bringing her to. Nonetheless, on the few occasions she'd had Thai food before she'd enjoyed it, and she hoped this time would be no different. Lily grasped Severus' hand tightly, and with an impish glint in her eye, they dashed across the street together. When they entered the restaurant, their nostrils were flooded with a scent of herbs and spices from half a world away. Lily expelled a happy sigh, recalling the few occasions her mum and dad had brought her and Petunia out for thai food as children. It'd been years since she'd last eaten the exotic cuisine, but she hoped that her tastes hadn't changed in the time since. In case it wasn't obvious from the outside, upon entering, the fittings and interior of the restaurant betrayed its heritage clearly for anyone still oblivious to it. Severus seemed just as surprised by the interior as Lily was, leading her to believe that he'd never set foot here before today as well.

They claimed a small table towards the front of the restaurant, and as they were sitting down, a waitress came up to them holding two menus. Severus heard tell that the restaurant was family-run, so it came as no surprise to see that their server was thai. After giving them their menus, she parted with them wearing a kind smile. Lily flipped open menu, her green eyes darting to and fro all across the page as she quickly sought out her favorite dishes. Severus perused his menu at a far more relaxed pace, casually flipping through the pages as he began putting together his order in mind.

"See anything you like?" Lily asked, still not lifting her gaze from the menu.

"I've got some ideas in mind," Severus said noncommittally.

"Let's here 'em then."

Severus arched a brow in surprise and set down the menu in front of him. "Alright. Well for starters…I think we should get the chicken green curry, I think it's pretty good. The basil and chili fried fish also sounds rather nice too…beyond that I'm open to suggestions."

"The duck red curry sounds like it'll taste delicious to me," said Lily. "Ooh, and the pad thai as well. Perhaps we could order some other dishes for takeout? There's so much on here that's—"

"We can do that," Severus agreed, already having thought of it himself. "Let's just stick with the four we've mentioned for now, and then anything else we like, we can take away."

Lily licked her lips and nodded in agreement. They ordered their four chosen dishes promptly, along with a pitcher of lime juice to share between them. When their waitress left to give their order to the kitchen, Lily turned her attention to Severus, her eyes wide and curious.

"Tell me, Sev…" Lily began, when their server was out of earshot. There was no disguising the gossipy gleam in her eyes as she trained her full focus on the man across from her. "How many dates have you been on over the years?"

"Is that what we're calling this?" he asked, his brow raised in surprise.

"I don't know, do you have any better ideas?"

"None, actually," he said with a little smirk. "And to answer your question, a few…but none beyond a first date."

"I know for certain that that's gonna change," Lily said promisingly.

Severus flashed her a mellow smile.

"In any case…you've definitely had more experience with first dates than me," Lily went on, sounding contemplative.

"Only two for you, right? Watkins in fifth year, and Potter in seventh."

Lily made no secret of her surprise at his awareness of her dating life. "I'm surprised you knew, not that there was much to learn about, mind."

Severus gave her a wan look. "Come on, Lily…you and Potter getting together was the talk of the town for the entire first half of Seventh year, can you expect me not to know about that when it was heralded as some aligning of the stars or an expression of true love—"

"—Utter, fucking hogwash," Lily sniped, Severus unable to contain his grin at her shoot-down. "Complete nonsense, though at the time, I suppose it felt a lot like true love. But who am I kidding, any eighteen year old pretending to know about true love is fucking full of it, and so was I."

"Since you think you've wizened up so much then…what is true love to you?" Severus pondered, his dark eyes glittering curiously.

Lily lifted her gaze to meet his and blinked slowly. She brushed some hair out of her fringe and said; "There is no such thing as true love. Sure, there's many kinds of love…but true love, where one is greater than all the rest…that only exists in fairy tales—at least that's what I think—"

"—I'd agree with that," Severus said in response, Lily smiling.

"With James…what we had was a flash in the pan, it was hot…and fiery and passionate—" Severus winced, the insinuation of her words scalding his mind's eye, "—but in the end it was bound to be short-lived. It was…it was problematic and we just kept adding oil to the fire…trying to prolong it and keep it going when it was never meant to be." Lily paused, sighing, "I gave up trying to salvage what I had with James when you told me the predicate for our dating was a lie."

She fixed him with a firm look then. "The thing with short, fiery love is…if you try to prolong it, it'll burn you—and that's what happened with James and I. It was…intense, but the foundation of our relationship was shoddy at best which is why we didn't last. Simple as that."

"I knew those rumors about the stars aligning were bullshit," Severus said, smiling in mock-sympathy. Lily could only laugh in response.

"Too right you are," she agreed heartily, before sobering. "I digress…that's enough about my past love-life, I say we look forward to the future."

"Yeah, let's," Severus murmured, a relieved expression crossing his face.

A slight smirk crossed Lily's features then as she leaned forward in a conspiratory manner across the table. "Assuming a first date is successful for you Severus," she said slowly, speaking each word with razor-sharp precision. "What would've come next?"

Severus doesn't truly know the answer to this, so he gave a shrug of his shoulders. "I don't know, I presume it'd depend on a case-by-case basis. Ideally…I'd make plans for a second date, if it'd gone successful, but I wouldn't know."

"Let me narrow it down for you then," Lily pressed. "What will we do following our first date?"

Severus sharpened his gaze at Lily in concentration, there was no disguising the impish glint in her eyes, and it was clear from her demeanor and teasing expression that she wanted him to see that glint in her eyes. There's a sense of smugness there too, twinkling away in her eyes, like she knew something he didn't, or that she's somehow got a leg up on him in some way. Then again, in terms of romantic experience, she does have a leg up on him, an awfully big leg at that; and now all of a sudden, a million thoughts swirl through Severus' head on what Lily's done following the various dates she'd been on earlier in her life.

"Sev?" Lily's voice snapped Severus out of his musings, his eyes refocusing on her just across from him. Her eyes are no longer twinkling, now softened and tempered with what looks like concern. "Are you alright? You looked like…you were staring into space there."

"I was," Severus said quickly, hoping that'd put her concerns at rest. "Sorry, I…well, to be honest, I don't know how to answer your question Lily, not definitively at least. So…I suppose we'll just have to wing it."

"That works," Lily said airily, twirling a loose strand of auburn around her finger. "It leaves your options open, and the sense of anticipation over what'll come next, whether it's a romantic stroll through the park—" Severus quite likes the sound of that, "—or we've shed all our clothing and are shagging like bunnies—" he nearly chokes on air when he hears that, "—or whatever else we might end up doing…the anticipation makes it better."

"And what would you have us do…if it were up to you, oh, wizened one?" Severus asked in return, his dark eyes glittering.

Her fingers brush against his, and that wicked gleam returns to her eyes once more, pulling Severus closer and sucking him in. He'd never known Lily to be such a seductress, but now, not even an earthquake, tornado and atom bomb going off all at once could pull his attention away from the alluring woman sat across from him. "Oh, if it were up to me, you say? Well…I'd—"

Severus never heard the end of her sentence, for she abruptly cut herself short when their server returned bearing a pitcher of lime juice and a couple of glasses. Once their server left to collect their four dishes, Severus turned his attention back to Lily.

"You were saying?"

"On second thoughts…perhaps I won't tell you. Not now, at least," she said teasingly.

Severus gave a snort of exasperation in response.

She poured out two glasses of lime juice, her expression sobering as she did, then lifted her gaze from her gaze from her glass to Severus.

"In all seriousness though, Sev, I'd like to take my time with what we have here, with us," she said earnestly. "My last romances were rushed…and they ended up crashing and burning…that's the last thing I'd want to happen with the two of us." She slowly reached a hand out across the table, Severus meeting her halfway and their fingers coming together in a gentle coupling.

"That's the last thing I'd want too," Severus replied. "And based on what you've said…I vow to be as truthful and transparent with you as I can be. I don't want there to be any secrets between us."

"No secrets, only truth," Lily avowed, holding his gaze with promise.

Silence fell upon them for a few moments then, as the two sipped at their drinks in waiting for their food, which would come moments later. Red and green curry, pad thai, fried fish and rice arraying themselves in front of them, courtesy of their waitress. They quietly helped themselves to portions of each dish, the idle chatter of the restaurant masking the fact that they'd lapsed into silence again.

"Can I ask a bit of a personal question?" Severus asked quietly, as they continued to heap portions of their meal onto their plates.

Lily lifted her head, her gaze curious. "Sure, what is it?"

His dark eyes radiated intensity, but beneath all that, Lily could see a sense of uncertainty, even fear in his gaze. She didn't have long to wonder what might be causing that fear though, for he soon spoke again.

"What is it you like about me?" he asked plainly.

Lily didn't know if her ears were deceiving her, or not, because she still couldn't believe that Severus had asked that of all things.

"What is it I like about you?" she parroted, still not quite sure of what he'd said, but sure that her ears weren't deceiving her. Not this time at least.

Severus nodded subduedly. "There's gotta be something, right?" His smile was self-deprecating, even a little ashamed-looking. Lily's heart lurched for all the wrong reasons at the sight. "Otherwise, how would your patronus be—"

"—There's a lot more than just something," Lily said swiftly. "There's…so much, and unless you want me to monologue for…I don't know, half an hour, perhaps I'd better give the condensed version. And after that, maybe you can do me the favor of telling me what you like about me."

"I can do that," Severus agreed readily, then nodded at her to begin.

Lily flashed Severus a brilliant smile, then pushed some hair behind her ear and began to speak.

"Hmm…well first and foremost, I love your passion, your dedication, your commitment. All of those things have…inspired me to do better, to be better even now, and I love how passionate you can be about the things you love, and care about. Potions and your thunderbirds being a chief example of that. There's also…there's also the fact that you're absolutely brilliant in every sense of the word. Your mind—your attitude—your unwillingness to settle for less than you can achieve. Your inability to quit…or to surrender or roll over no matter what challenge your facing…has inspired me from afar as well." She paused then, a saddened look passing over her visage. "It helped inspire me during the war, you know. Your never say die, no-quit attitude…Merlin knows I only had to look to how you stood up to your father…or to the Marauders and I could draw inspiration from that alone to not lose faith, to keep fighting the good fight. You always fought and clawed, tooth and nail for not just yourself…but those you care about, I—I respect and value that immensely in you, it's something I strive to emulate each and every day."

With each word she spoke, Severus found his heart lifting higher and higher, his smile so blindingly bright, Lily knew she'd never seen him look so euphoric, but she wasn't even done yet. Not even close.

"I also love how caring you are…about those you love and treasure," she said softly, now holding his gaze with her bright, vivid, green eyes. "The love and attention you so willingly give the birds is clear as day for me to see…and you always hold their best interests at heart and show your love and affection for them so proudly on your sleeve. It's wonderful to witness, the love you so freely give them," She smiled abashedly. "The truth is, I love seeing you adore them…cherish them, and treat them with such love and tenderness I sometimes struggle to rationalize it's you."

Severus couldn't help but chuckle then, for not long ago he was an apathetic, moody teenager who didn't care about anything except for Potions and the Dark Arts.

"And—and if the birds aren't proof enough of that…I love seeing how you interact with my children too," Lily said reverentially, her green eyes sparkling, earnest, and dare he say it, loving. "It's…clear to me that they love you, and I—I don't want to sound presumptive here…but I think you—value them too."

"I do," Severus said softly. He couldn't commit to using the L-word yet, but in time perhaps he could. "Your children are amazing, and prove your brilliance as their mother, Lily."

Lily smiled fondly at him, the small upturn of her lips and her sparkling eyes ensnaring his attention and holding it fast. Try as he might, he was unable to turn away from her brilliant, emerald eyes.

"And the way you interact with them and have taken them under your wing…is amazing too," Lily said softly, sending his heart soaring ever higher, ever faster. It felt as though it might burst out of his chest, yet all the same, it was clear he was hanging on her every word. "I love that about you, Sev. I love your intelligence, your dedication, your resolve and humility…and I love your passion and willingness to go the extra mile for all whom you care about most of all."

"There's a lot more I have to say on the matter, and that's just the beginning of it…like I haven't even touched on your physical attributes yet—" Severus paled a little bit, but if Lily noticed she pointedly ignored it. Her smile bloomed even brighter as a faint dusting of red crept up on her cheeks and across the bridge of her nose, "—You've got nice, rough, and very strong hands. Oh, and your eyes are very…deep, dark and mysterious too. You've also got a lovely, big nose, and you know what they say about men that have big noses, right?"

"I don't think there's any need to get into that," Severus said hastily, shutting down that train of conversation.

Lily could only grin, whilst letting her imagination secretly ran wild. She raised her glass of lime juice to her lips and took a sip, then said; "Now I do believe you promised to return the favor."

Severus swallowed his mouthful of food and nodded. "Alright, but there's a fair bit to unpack here," he said calmly, Lily nodding in encouragement.

"Your kindness has always been something I've valued…and treasured," Severus said softly. "As has your compassion to all those around you…like me. If how you've befriended me wasn't enough proof of it, I think your friendship with Avery during the war further shows that…from what you've told me, you went above and beyond to make him feel welcome on…on your side of the fence. Your compassion and kindness is something I've tried in recent years to emulate, with my rangers…and the birds too, of course…but there's only one you, Lily, and try as I might I don't think I'll ever manage to be as compassionate and caring as you are."

Lily was smiling brightly, and Severus found himself smiling too. Just the thought of Lily's kindness and ample love she had to spare for him, whether it be now or in their childhood, was enough to set his heart soaring high through the stratosphere.

"Beyond all that, I've always admired your courage too…your willingness to stand up for what you viewed as right…in spite of your bull-headedness…I've always looked up to. I know we've had our disagreements in the past…and at the times I thought you were just being a stubborn bint, but—"

"Hey! That's hardly fair to say, Sev—"

"—I'm not finished yet," Severus interjected swiftly, "hear me out."

Lily sent Severus a mock-glare, but didn't say anything more.

"Despite your bull-headedness with regard to your beliefs…and your values too—" Lily's glare deepened, but she heeded Severus' request and didn't say a word. "—I've always admired your resolve and grit, your inability to fold when your morals are on the line. And at the end of the day if one's morals are not in line with your's, Lily…then they're standing on the wrong side of the fence." He gave her a serious look then, his coal-black eyes glimmering intensely in the warm glow of the wall-mounted light.

"I learned that in my seventh year, and in many ways I can credit my decision to come here and start anew in America to your tenacity and strength. Your strength and resolve…but most of all, your kindness, love…and even your cheekiness and vivaciousness are all things I love about you, Lily," Severus said earnestly.

Somewhere in the midst of his heart-felt monologue, Lily's hand had slid across the table to grasp Severus'. Her warm fingers sliding against his cool ones, he shivered slightly at her loving touch, but that only made her grasp him even tighter.

"There's a lot more I could say," Severus chuckled, squeezing her fingers tightly. "Your sense of humor and your snark…your brilliance at magic with or without a wand. I love your positivity, your intelligence and integrity too; but it's your kindness and compassion I adore most of all. The fact that you're drop-dead-gorgeous certainly doesn't hurt as well—" Lily blushed visibly and her lips quivered in delight, "—anyways…there's a lot more I could say that I love about you too, but—

"Why don't you save the rest for a rainy day?" she suggested, now smirking devilishly. "If I'm feeling down and could use a pick-me-up, you can just carry-on listing all the things you love about me from where you left off, okay?"

Severus' eyes crinkled around the edges as he released a reverberating, hearty chuckle. "We'll see. But only if you're willing to do the same…aside from talking about my—err, anatomy, of course."

"You've got yourself a deal, my friend," Lily grinned, her eyes twinkling with love.

For the rest of their meal, conversation returned to more familiar territory for Severus and Lily. Lily revealed that she wanted to begin some practical tests soon of her new spell, and that she was currently theorizing how she could combine the constituent charms together that would make up her anti-Fiendfyre spell—still no luck with regard to a name. Severus, on the other hand, had news to share himself, for next month he planned to start creating a partition of the reserve for another magical bird species, Phoenixes, specifically. Chatting about their work lapsed them back into familiar habits, Severus almost forgot that he was even on a date. Were it not for the fonder-than-usual smiles, and the not-so-discreet touches, Severus would've indeed forgotten that they were on a date. When they finished their meal, Severus and Lily decided to order a few more dishes to bring back home with them, and after paying their tab they left the restaurant. A suggestion by Severus to go for a walk in the park was turned down by Lily, who asked if they could return home instead. Lily's use of the word home wasn't lost on Severus, it filled his chest with a swell of pride and brought a smile to his face too. Even the radio blaring one of his least favorite songs, coincidentally one of Lily's favorites, couldn't quite wipe the smile off Severus' face as he drove home.

Severus pulled to a stop in front of the house and they headed inside with their takeout in hand. Lily followed him into the kitchen, keeping a few paces behind him as Severus walked towards the fridge to put away their takeout. He'd only just closed the fridge door and hadn't even turned around yet when he felt the presence of a hand on his back, and another on his hip. A firm pull whirled Severus around to come face-to-face with Lily. Only a fool would've mistook the want, no, the need in her eyes. So, he didn't waste a second more and kissed her. Her lips parted pliant and willing under his, allowing him just a taste of her before she brought her teeth down and gave a careful nip of his lower lip. Severus didn't allow it to deter him though, for he soon resumed exploring her with his tongue, and for her part she allowed it whilst replicating his actions herself. Her palm came up to brace herself against his chest, the other grasping his hip and pulling him flush against her with surprising urgency. Severus felt the heat between his legs growing and he couldn't suppress a groan as a result, his hips giving an involuntary buckle against her's. Lily smiled against his mouth, leaving another teasing nip on his lower lip before pulling away from him.

Her eyes shone with challenge, and Severus had every intention of rising to said challenge, whatever it may be. Hand in hand, they left the kitchen to the sitting room whereupon Lily roughly pushed Severus down onto the sofa with strength befitting of her house mascot. Severus stared up at her in awe, as Lily moved to sit astride his thigh and her lips found his once more. Severus' hands once again found a home on her hips, guiding her to sit atop his thigh, and inadvertently spurring Lily on to grind her hips against the rough fabric all the while continuing their plundering kiss.

"Lily," Severus groaned into her mouth, trying to still her hips as they ground themselves into a frenzy in his lap, her knee getting uncomfortably close to his groin. His pants grew awfully constricted all of a sudden, and he was certain that she somehow knew. Yet it didn't stop Lily from grinding the apex of her white, jean-clad thighs into his leg with reckless abandon.

"Sev," she murmured back, kissing him again ravenously.

"We need—to…to stop," he said hoarsely, forcefully pulling his lips away.

She licked her lips but quickly worked to suppress her expression of hurt as she peered intently at him. "Why? Was it…did you—"

"—We should take things slowly," Severus interrupted, still breathing heavily. His use of Lily's own words earlier evidently surprised her, but she still nodded nonetheless. "As you said…we should take our time…and not rush things."

Lily swallowed thickly, then shut her eyes and tried to slow her breathing. She shifted off his lap and sat down beside him, her knees hugged tightly to her chest. The flush on her cheeks mercifully seemed to recede, in its place a sense of calm rising to the fore. "Alright," she said softly. "It's just…I—well, you know—" she gesticulated awkwardly with both hands and then gave a hoarse sounding laugh, "—it's…been a while, and I—yeah, I'm sorry for that."

Severus reached across to cup the porcelain skin of her cheek, then kissed her forehead, Lily sighing pleasantly. "Our first time will be all that much better, won't it?" He withdrew his hand, his warmth going with it.

Lily gave him a wan smile. "Definitely." Lily's expression seemed to shift rapidly, a sobering look of curiosity replacing her smile. "Erm—if it's alright for me to ask…how long has it been for you?"

Severus raised a brow of surprise. "Do you really want to know that?"

"If you're fine with telling me…then yeah," Lily said swiftly, her eyes wide with genuine curiosity.

Severus heaved a soft sigh then, his head dipping forward as lank strands of black hair obscured his face. "A few years," he said quietly. "I'd have been…almost twenty four at the time, the end of '83…so nearly two years."

The silence in lieu of his answer was deafening, Severus could even hear the audible gulp Lily gave as she reached across the divide between them and grasped his fingers. "Nothing since '83?" she murmured quietly.

Severus shook his head. "It's not been something I've…actively pursued recently," he replied. "I—erm, I've had some issues to deal with recently…and with Mister Whitehall's passing a few years ago sex was kinda the last thing on my mind. I didn't go out of my way for a shag, if you get what I mean."

Lily nodded in understanding, she knew what it was like to abstain for many months at a time, albeit never a full year, let alone two years like Severus was describing…but she'd gone many months during the war when she neither had the time, nor was even in the mood for sex with James. And in the dying months of her marriage…gosh, it must've been more than half a year for her now since she last had sex, her groin throbbing at the mere thought of it.

"I haven't had sex in a while as well," Lily said, in what was surely meant to be a comforting tone. "Erm—six or seven months…so, not quite as long as you—" she flushed dully, then raised a hand to brush some loose hair out of her face, "—but I kinda understand what you mean when a good rump in the sack falls down your priority list…so, to speak."

Severus nearly choked on air upon hearing her, but just about maintained his composure.

"I—yeah, sorry about getting carried away," she said sheepishly, rubbing the back of her head with her free hand. "I guess I was thinking with my metaphorical cock there instead of my brain, sorry about that."

There was something about the way Lily said the word 'cock' that twisted his innards every which way, but beyond that, also sent a jolt of arousal to his groin—his pants becoming awfully tight as the word left her lips.

"It's…no harm no foul," said Severus, working overtime to maintain his composure.

Lily's sheepish smile was quickly replaced by a genuine one. Without a word she quickly reached across between them and kissed his cheek softly. "You're so swee—nope, not that, you're amazing Sev."

"So I've been told," he said dryly, earning him a sarcastic laugh and a light whack on the arm from Lily.

A million more questions darted through Lily's mind with surprising speed, but not wanting to sound desperate or prying, she refused to voice them. The many unanswered questions she had for her old fr—no, boyfriend, would have to wait, though she supposed she could ask one now and that was clarifying what they were to one another.

"I suppose we should've touched on this yesterday," she began quietly. "But we are properly dating now, aren't we?"

"I—yes, I'd presume so," Severus replied.

Lily smiled genuinely then. "Good. Because the last thing I'd want to label our arrangement is something…casual…like friends with benefits or something…that's not for me. I'm in this for the long haul."

Severus swallowed thickly and nodded. "So am I."

"I know," she said softly. "But I'm still glad to hear you say it nonetheless."

Severus couldn't help but smile then, and leaned over to kiss her gently on the lips. Lily returned the kiss readily and hungrily, but unlike earlier the fire that was present seemed to have waned to smoldering embers but still refused to be put out. Their lips caressed each other languidly, kissing laving each other with all the time in the world, which Severus hoped, they would have. That, Severus supposed, was their brand of love. Lily described her relationship with James as fiery and explosive, a flash in the pan she'd phrased it. Whereas the love they shared perhaps lacked in intensity or heat by comparison, but it was always present, always lingering, ready to flare up and intensify on a whim. As Lily's lips moved pliantly and eagerly against his, again, lacking the fire of their earlier kisses, Severus couldn't help but feel that he preferred this brand of love more. Longer, everlasting, inextinguishable love. And judging by the way Lily's lips continued to slide and press languidly against his, Severus was willing to bet good money that Lily preferred this kind of love as well.

A/N2: Thank you all for reading! Up next, some unresolved baggage from Lily's past rears its head.