Seventeen.
Olivia positioned herself in the middle of the bed, tucked one arm under her head, and waited for Ed. He and Noah had been in Riverdale most of the afternoon and evening helping Caroline set up her spring furniture on the deck. They returned with full stomachs, a few scrapes, and, for Noah, a root beer float moustache. After his bath, the five Tuckers gathered on the sofa for their regular Saturday night movie and junk food fest. Everyone wanted a piece of the soft blanket from Ireland. Maggie liked to rub the lamb's wool against her face as Ed had done when he and Olivia video chatted. Poor Wyatt tried to commandeer the entire thing, and Noah merely giggled and wisely said he'd wait his turn since he had the privilege of staying up later than his siblings.
"We'll haveta go back soon and get another one," Ed murmured.
"We could order online," Olivia suggested.
Maggie was in her lap, the two of them using Ed as a cushion. After Wyatt gave up his quest for the blanket, he and Noah snuggled together on the chaise. Ed played with Olivia's fingers.
"Not the same," he mumbled into her ear.
The kids went to bed without protest. Olivia had been lax on Maggie's nap, so even the reluctant sleeper willingly turned in for the night. Olivia went to bed, and Ed double checked the locks, turned off lights, and adjusted the thermostat; however, he was gone longer than he should have been and when he finally joined his wife, she was a wee bit impatient.
Until she saw the bottle in his hand.
"I didn't know we had any of that left," she said, smiling up at him as he stripped down to his underwear.
"I didn't either." He tossed his t-shirt on the armchair and assessed the bed. Olivia had left him very little space on his side. "Um…s'cuse me?" He put one knee on the mattress and waited, pretending to be unaffected and immune to her advances. The trouble was, it was impossible not to be aroused by the sight in front of him—dark hair splashed on the fresh white pillowcases, raised eyebrows challenging him to carve out space for himself, and lips curled in an alluring pucker as she ran an index finger along his thigh.
He held out the bottle, "Wanna sip?"
"Not yet," she purred.
He put the bourbon on the nightstand and slowly crawled forward until he was propped on his forearms, straddling her. Olivia played with his hair, his ears, and traced his cheekbones. "You have a scratch here," she said, gingerly touching a half-inch long streak below his earlobe.
"Shrubs," he mumbled, "Needed to be cut…it really hurts."
Olivia grinned, lifted her head, and kissed the mark. "Better?"
"A little."
She kissed him in the same spot then bit his earlobe. "How about now?"
"Mmmmmm."
He let his body fall into hers and initiated a passionate kiss. They held each other tightly, unwilling to surrender a millimeter of separation between their bodies. Sex was inevitable, so they silently agreed to savor this simple intimacy. When they paused for breath or to switch angles, they exchanged coy smiles.
"I love you, Liv," Ed whispered, taking a second to stare into her eyes, emphasizing the words were more than a trite phrase. Ed loved Olivia every second of every day; in everything he did, he lived and breathed her. From the moment they'd shared their first kiss, Ed vowed to devote the rest of his life to making her happy. He was succeeding, but he would never surrender to complacency. Each day presented another opportunity to find new ways to love her.
….
The host seated the Tuckers on the deck at a corner table with an umbrella where they had an unobstructed view of the ocean. The kids ignored the laminated breakfast menus and fixated on a beach volleyball game being played on a court situated about twenty yards away. They rearranged their chairs and were sitting with their backs to Ed and Olivia.
Ed grinned and leaned over for a kiss. "I guess we're, uh, a party of two now?"
"I guess so," she replied, "Kind of early for volleyball."
"Prolly figure it's cooler now."
A bubbly young waitress arrived for drink orders and the kids turned around, suntanned fists gripping the backs of their plastic chairs.
"I like your goggles," she said to Wyatt.
While Maggie insisted on wearing her bathing suit most places, Wyatt rarely relinquished his swim eyewear. He either wore the goggles around his neck or on his forehead. They were an expensive pair, black with blue-tinted lenses, and were among Wyatt's most prized possessions.
"Thanks," Wyatt said shyly.
"Wyatt has those goggles 'cause we always swim!" Maggie interjected. "Like, we could swim out there before our br'feast comes!" She lifted her cover up, "And I have my bathin' suit!" Maggie grinned triumphantly. Her hair was pulled back in pigtails and each of her fingernails was painted a different color because the last time Sarah took her for a manicure she couldn't decide on only one hue.
Amused, the waitress chuckled and asked for their drink orders. "You need to stay hydrated for all this swimming," she said. The kids politely ordered their preferred beverages and went back to the volleyball game.
Ed ordered a Bloody Mary and Olivia went with mimosa. They didn't pressure the kids into selecting their breakfasts quite yet. The ambiance was peaceful and relaxing, and they weren't in a hurry to leave.
The volleyball players were incredibly skilled. They raced around the sandy court with ease, made sharp passes, diving digs, and laser-like spikes. It wasn't long before all three Tucker kids were on their feet and visibly reacting to the action.
"Mom can we go down there?" Noah eventually asked.
Ed glanced at Olivia. There were a few other spectators. The beach was wide open, and they could easily keep an eye on their trio. She shrugged.
"Sure, bud. We're gonna order in a little bit. Maggie, I know you want waffles and bacon."
"I want cheesy eggs," Wyatt said.
"I want dippy eggs and toast and bacon," Noah said.
"You got it."
Olivia simpered at Ed. They could have requested anything on the menu and he would have ordered it.
Noah led the twins down the steps toward the court. They each had their plastic kiddie cups in their hands. They took a seat in the sand and, soon, Ed and Olivia heard them cheering when someone made an outstanding play. A few of the players started giving them high fives. When the ball bounced far away from the court, the kids retrieved it.
On the deck, Olivia never once took her eyes off her children. Noah, always one to follow rules and consider safety, would never let his siblings wander off. She and Ed could be at the court in seconds if their kids were threatened. Nevertheless, she refused to divert her vision to anything or anyone else.
Ed propped his feet on Noah's chair and sipped his Bloody Mary.
"Those guys are good," he remarked.
Olivia didn't let her overprotectiveness stop her from teasing Ed. "They are. And they're also…in very good shape."
Ed grinned and puffed out his chest. "Maybe we need to have a game later…"
"Sarah and Justin are never going to invite us back," Olivia joked, "I think everyone's tired of trying to keep up with us."
"They needta suck it up," he said, "We're in our mid-fifties for Chrissakes. And we dominated on the football field last night."
"You mean I dominated."
"I was the only one who could keep up with you."
"Then why did I score four touchdowns? And you had to cheat to stop me!"
"I didn't cheat," Ed said of the illegal tackle, "I wanted to be close to you."
"Uh-huh."
The food's arrival interrupted their banter. Ed put his thumb and forefinger into his mouth and his shrill whistle pierced the air. All three kids' heads snapped in his direction and they came running back to the deck.
"Ya think you wanna play volleyball tonight?" Ed asked after Maggie, Wyatt, and Noah excitedly described the players' skills.
All three of them responded with an enthusiastic "YES!"
"We gotta get a volleyball, Daddy," Wyatt said.
Noah furrowed his brow, "That ball was kinda hard."
"We'll find something a little softer," Olivia said. "What should the teams be?"
Organizing teams was Maggie's forte. She stopped eating and articulated her plan, waving her hands around as she spoke. It was a classic Olivia-esque mannerism, and Ed smirked proudly.
"It should be us," Maggie said and pointed at each of her family members as she counted, "One, two, three, four, five. We're one team and we're 'gainst Brooke, Sonny, Justy, Sare Bear, and Sof. That's five, too. So, it's even, but," she bit her lip and thought out loud, "there's more old people on the other team…but…" she thought for a few more seconds and shrugged, "We winned at Marco Polo and it was little people 'gainst big people and Sare Bear always goes and gets a drink in da middle so…s'okay."
Noah and Wyatt agreed with Maggie and they began plotting strategy.
After they stopped their gentle, loving laughter, Ed whispered to Olivia, "Did she call us old people?"
"Indirectly," Olivia said, "But, to be fair, she also called all adults old."
"We're gonna kick ass," he murmured.
Olivia raised her glass. "Cheers to that."
….
Caroline was thrilled to learn she would have to set an extra place for dinner late Sunday afternoon. Mia came over for what was supposed to be a two hour play date, but her father called and begged the Tuckers to keep Mia longer. He had a work emergency, was on his own with his daughter for the weekend, and couldn't get a hold of the nanny on her day off. Ed explained they were headed to Riverdale. They were happy to take Mia, but wouldn't be back until later in the evening. Mr. Bianchi saw this as a positive—he could focus on work and definitely finish by the time the Tuckers returned his daughter.
Ed ended the call and announced the news. Mia and Noah were ecstatic and the twins joined their celebratory laps around the living room. Olivia smiled but fretted about travel. With the car seats and Noah's booster, room in the back seat of the Tuckers' small SUV was at a premium.
"We'll take out Noah's and put 'em in the middle?" Ed suggested.
"That's so dangerous," Olivia said through gnashed teeth.
Ed kissed her cheek and whispered, "I'll be extra, extra careful."
She squeezed his hand and nodded.
Once everyone was safely at Caroline's, Ed hovered around the guest and his son, ready to pounce on his mother if she said anything he deemed inappropriate. Like everyone else, Caroline quickly became smitten with the sprightly little girl, especially when she wandered through the cluttered living and dining rooms and marveled, "Gramma, you got a lotta stuff!"
"Think so, dearie?" Caroline replied. "Should I throw anything out?"
"Nah," Mia said, scrunching up her nose, "It's cozy." She jumped into the recliner and cuddled with the train pillow Caroline purchased for Noah years ago. "This yours, Noah?"
"Yep! We got lotsa toys here, too! Daddy? Can we go out in da back?"
"Yes you can," Caroline answered before Ed opened his mouth, "Because your Daddy is grilling the sausages I snuck into the country from Ireland." She shoved a foil-wrapped package into Ed's hands, "Let's not have a repeat of the turkey fiasco, huh?"
Ed's face reddened and he jumped to his own defense, "That was the smoker, Ma! That thing's broken."
Brooke was concerned about the meat itself, "Are you sure it's safe to eat?"
Sarah cast her eyes upward, presumably calculating how long the sausages had gone without refrigeration.
Caroline checked her granddaughters' apprehension. "Those babies were frozen solid when we left! I ate one last night and look! I'm alive and not vomiting nor do I have the runs!"
"Gross," Sarah muttered. She and Brooke followed the others onto the deck. Noah was already trotting toward the garage and Sarah nudged Ed. "Anything broken in there this year?" She asked, her eyes wide and innocent.
He couldn't help but smile. "Nah. Everything intact."
"Oh good, she said, "Well, on second thought…a little disappointing if ya catch my drift." She winked at him over her shoulder and began taking everyone's drink orders.
Olivia came outside with Maggie, and the little girl, seeing everyone in the yard, made a beeline for the steps.
"Whoa, whoa, sweetheart," Ed cautioned, grabbing her hand, "Lemme help ya. Big step."
"BI'STEP!"
"Another one."
"JUMP!"
Ed took her other hand. "Okay, one, two, threeee, jump!"
Maggie's "jump" skipped the final steps and she landed on the grass. Ed flipped her upside down, blew strawberries on her belly, and wrapped her in a bear hug before she joined everyone else. Brooke was helping Noah and Mia arrange the croquet set. As backups, Noah had also found the golf clubs, the Little Tikes basketball hoop, and Caroline's assortment of years-old ride-on toys.
Ed bounded up the stairs to a smiling Olivia. She planted a firm kiss on his lips.
"Wow," he said, "What did I do to deserve that?"
"I love watching you take care of people."
He clasped his hands around her waist and smirked. They swayed together for a moment until Caroline stepped outside with her cocktail in hand.
"Jesus Christ, you two, I can't leave you alone for two minutes! Eddie, you're supposed to be starting the grill, not making love to Olivia in front of everyone!"
Ed played along. "I make love to her everywhere, Ma."
Caroline lovingly shook her head. "Will you take a tiny break and start the goddam grill?"
"Sure, Ma."
"You were only gone a week," Caroline continued, "I thought you would've made up for the lost time the day we got back!"
Olivia burst into laughter and put an arm around Caroline's shoulders. "I love you," she said softly.
"I love you, too, dearie. Now, get yourself a drink. Don't always feel like you have to go along with Eddie's advances."
A few minutes later, Mia invited Caroline to try and hit the croquet ball. Olivia sidled up to Ed as he waited for the burners to heat up, kissed his cheek, and whispered, "I'll always go along with your advances, Ed Tucker."
….
The apartment was so still, when the icemaker dropped a fresh set of cubes, the sound seemed decibels louder than it actually was. It startled Ed and he flinched. His drooped eyelids snapped open.
"Ed, go to sleep," Olivia implored softly. Her head was opposite his body and her knees were bent across his lap.
"You wanna be alone?"
A bundle of nerves sizzled against Olivia's ribcage.
Alone.
Ed respected her need for independence. He had proven himself adept at allowing her space while gradually showing her shedding the hardened persona she preferred to present to the world and leaning on him did not amount to weakness. Since she and the Crivellos had been taken hostage, he made himself as available as she needed him to be. He was good at reading her; and she appreciated how skilled he was at caring for her without condescension. Unpredictably, Ed Tucker was an excellent listener. He knew when to offer and advice and when to simply let her rant. Most of the time he sensed when she wanted him to touch her, hold her, and when she needed to be left alone. And, when he wasn't sure, he asked.
Like he'd just done.
And she absolutely did not want to be alone.
"I keep replaying it in my head," she said. Her voice was already trembling and she reached for her hand. "Every second. Every decision. How did we…Mike, me, how did we not search him?"
The question was obviously rhetorical. Ed squeezed her fingers and gripped her kneecap with the other hand.
"It was…it was a nice day, it started that way…I keep thinking, Dodds and I…we were both looking ahead, this one thing, one minor thing, get her and the kids out of there, it was a trivial piece of our day, then we were back to having cake and…" Olivia trailed off. She stared at the ceiling with unshed tears glistening in her eyes.
Ed's gaze remained fixed straight ahead at the muted television screen. He steeled his jaw. Deep down, he heard Olivia's unspoken words. Like Dodds, she, too, had been floating on air that day, regarding the future with giddy optimism.
"We got careless…"
In seconds, Olivia rearranged her position so she was under Ed's arm. She sobbed into his chest for a few minutes. Then, as suddenly as she'd started, her eyes dried.
"Say something," she said quietly.
Ed touched her cheek with the back of his fingers. Telling Olivia it wasn't her fault was no use. At the hospital he'd insisted there were a hundred ways the scenario could have played out. In other conversations he speculated he would have done the same thing, he would have prioritized the children. At no point, no matter how he'd crafted the arguments, did she seem convinced.
"I'm glad to hear you say we." He replied after thinking for a few seconds.
She kissed him deeply and cupped the back of his head. After the intense liplock, she stood up and said, "C'mon, let's go to bed."
He rose to his feet and studied her features. "Sure?"
"I don't want to be alone." Olivia took a deep breath and acknowledged her words amounted to more than a simple sentence. She swallowed, bit her lip, and raised her eyes to his, "I need you."
In her room they casually undressed as if they were an old married couple settling in for the night. However, once Ed was under the covers on what had become his side, he wasted no time taking her into his arms. Hearing "I need you" was, perhaps, the most thrilling phrase Olivia Benson could have uttered. He felt a little guilty admitting it, for her "I need you" was almost always the result of trauma. But it gave him the opportunity to make her forget for a little while and to physically show her how he was falling more and more in love with her despite and maybe a bit because of the obstacles they'd hurdled and dodged over the past few months.
During foreplay, she closed her eyes and threw her head back against the pillows, but, as he hovered over her, ready to move on, he insisted she look at him.
"I love you, Liv."
Between the two of them, the phrase was still new, raw, and spoken with an air of hesitancy, not because he didn't mean it but because he was afraid of scaring her away, worried it was too much for her to handle. He needn't have worried. She reciprocated with an equally profound reply and even gave him a little smile as she raised her hips to his.
…..
#Tuckson
(FYI…I had to go back to work so updates won't be as quick as they've been…I know…booooooo)