"So, tell me about your mission," Junso demanded, while the two were setting up their meal on what they had both come to consider "their" fence.
"No," Yori refused. "You first. You are the hostess here, so it is only right that you tell me about what you have been doing since we last saw each other."
"I don't know how the etiquette works for this situation," Junso cupped her chin in one hand, exaggerating a pose of contemplation. "When exchanging gossip, is it the one who made the invitation or the one who accepted that has to tell all first?"
"Etiquette matters not," Yori insisted. "I simply won't speak about my mission until you describe what you've been doing." She paused a moment. "I doubt you would have been so eager to speak to me if you didn't have something interesting to share."
"So now you're getting both humorous and pushy," Junso smirked. "I'm succeeding! But you're right, I've learned some things that are both interesting and may answer a question you asked the last time we were out here."
"Oh?" Yori asked. "What question was that?"
"Why I had to bear the Han," Junso told her. "You were not quite correct in your statement that most of us are descended from Toshimiru. Well, it turns out that this is a half-truth that has been passed down for generations."
"This sounds most interesting," Yori noted. "What is the full truth."
"It may take me a bit to explain."
"I'm counting on that," Yori pointed out, helping herself to a rice ball.
"Okay, buckle in," Junso smirked again. "It turns out that when Master Toshimiru showed up and started to carve Yamanouchi Mountain, he had sixteen samurai loyal to him. These were men whom he had defeated in personal combat, who then served him in return for instruction in Monkey Kung Fu. Over time, they lost their desire to become better able to serve some wealthy lord and joined in his vision of a sheltered sanctum, where they could hone their skills and serve the Mystical Monkey Power."
"That makes sense," Yori nodded. "Toshimiru wouldn't have been able to found a school without students...and unless he had students, it wouldn't have made much sense to create a school."
"Well, the locals at the foot of the mountain weren't happy at first," Junso continued. "It was bad enough that some warlord or another passed through and seized their crops and children every few years. They didn't like the idea of some warrior school drawing more attention to the area. Of course, when Toshimiru and his followers proved capable of protecting them, they became a lot happier. Then, one day, a nameless woman showed up."
"Another great warrior?" Yori asked.
"A refugee, or at least that's how she introduced herself," Junso told her. "In reality, she was a ninja and she refused to speak of her past. To the best that Toshimiru was able to determine, she had lost her clan in some power struggle between several warlords, and she ran away looking for peace. She found it in the lands beneath Yamanouchi Mountain, and she was determined to protect this peace."
"An easy goal to achieve," Yori noted. "If the great Toshimiru and his samurai were already providing it."
"Ah, that's what Toshimiru would have thought, as well," Junso said. "Until one day a powerful warlord took interest in this new realm that was forming. He must have thought 'if there is a school carved atop the mountain, there must be riches to be had.' Anyway, he had a strong host at his back when he marched on the mountain and set up camp, prepared to meet Toshimiru and his samurai the next day. The locals either fled their farms and villages, knowing that the fighting would most likely sweep over them, or prepared to stand with Toshimiru, as he was a kindly and just master. Yet, the next morning, all was confusion in the invaders' camp."
"The warlord's head was mounted on a pike in front of his tent," Junso continued. "Both of his chief lieutenants awoke with one of their chieftain's hands lying next to them in their beds. The warlord's sword was missing, as were the swords of the two lieutenants. Those two could only agree on one thing, that marching on Yamanouchi was a mistake. So, they ordered the host to pack up and return to where they had come."
"You could have just told me what happened," Yori quipped. "But I like the storytelling narrative better."
"This ninja, who still appeared to be a refugee, presented the three swords to Toshimiru," Junso smiled at Yori's comment. "And this created a debate between the ninja, Toshimiru and the greatest of his samurai. The samurai berated the ninja, saying that her actions had been dishonorable and cowardly. The ninja endured this scorn with great stoicism, and when the samurai was finished, asked a few, simple questions. First, she asked the proud samurai if he could have assured victory in battle. The samurai was proud and brave, but also honest. While the samurai were well trained and capable, they were few in number and the warlord had a large host, who were far from new to battle."
"After that, the ninja asked the samurai if, even had Toshimiru's forces carried the day, how many would have fallen or been maimed." Junso continued the tale. "The samurai, being an experienced warrior as well as an honest man, stated that while he didn't know the exact number, several samurai would have certainly been hurt badly. Not only that, but many men of the area would have become casualties, as well."
"The ninja then asked the samurai how many of the warlord's followers, men who had pledged their service to him, would have fallen." Junso told her companion. "She asked him if these men, who had sworn their service to him actually regretted marching upon the peaceful valley, but could not in good faith and honor walk away. Did these men deserve death? The samurai again said that he did not know."
"Finally, the ninja asked Toshimiru himself how many would have fallen after such a battle," Junso continued. "She pointed out that with at least some of the farmers, herders, fishermen and other laborers either killed or fled, there would have been fewer to work the fields and lakes. A famine would have most likely followed. There would have been bodies strewn about with no labor available to dispose of them, bringing a pestilence. How many would have fallen to hunger and disease? Toshimiru could not answer."
"It was only now that the ninja defended her actions," Junso recounted the tale. "She pointed out that only one man; the very man who had decided to bring violence to the peaceful valley, had fallen. From the lower slopes of Mount Yamanouchi, she pointed to where even then, the people were returning to their homes and sturdy peasants were already taking up tools and heading to the fields and forests. Was it dishonorable to take actions that made this possible? Was it a vile act to let those who only wanted to labor in peace to be able to do so?"
"Both Toshimiru and the samurai were humbled," Junso concluded. "Both bowed low to the ninja, in apology for their earlier words, in acknowledgment of her reasoning and in recognition of her action. With utmost respect, Toshimiru requested that she advise him and bring another perspective in his governing the Yamanouchi School and the lands around it."
"An enjoyable tale," Yori noted. "But not one than answered my question."
"Just preparing the setting for you," Junso told her. "Besides, I've gone through the trouble of digging this stuff up, you can at least humor me by listening."
"Indeed," Yori agreed. "The more you keep talking, the more I am able to eat."
"Go for it," Junso shrugged. "None of the cooks will deny me a snack at this time. Anyway, you can probably guess how things changed with a ninja among Toshimiru's advisers. One of the first things she suggested was to keep the school hidden, as the warlord had been drawn to the area because of the school. This appealed to the humility that Toshimiru was trying to cultivate. Instead of drawing students through reputation, the school would send out agents; men and women who were traders, performers, or others who had need to travel the lands. The travelers would report those who appeared to be compatible with training in Monkey Kung Fu. They would also take note of current events. This was a precursor to the information network we have today."
"Interesting," Yori noted. "It's also puzzling why we aren't taught this. However, it's still not answering why only you were acceptable to carry the Han."
"Getting there," Junso protested. "So if you chew completely and carefully, I'll be able to finish the tale while you're still stuffing your face. Anyway, it turns out that Toshimiru had a sister; a fine and fit young woman who had her eye on the greatest of the samurai who followed her brother. Well, the dose of humility he had taken from the ninja changed him, made him even more desirable in her eyes. It wasn't long before she married the man. Keep in mind, these were the days before Netflix, television, widespread books, all of these diversions. There wasn't all that much to do in the evenings when the days training and duties were done, both the samurai and Toshimiru's sister were young and fit, so they had a large family. Other of Toshimiru's followers married and had families, but in a fairly isolated population like Yamanouchi, it was inevitable that before the first half-millennium had passed, everyone here was a descendant of that original couple. Sure, the occasional outsider is drawn in to this day, enough to keep us from getting inbred, but they either move on, pass on without having children, or wind up marrying a descendant."
"Still not hearing what makes you stand out," Yori noted.
"Ah, the impatience of youth," Junso snickered a little. "I guess I was just as agitated at your age...three years ago. Anyway, if you believe the records, the Mystical Monkey Power itself possessed and influenced Toshimiru and the ninja, causing them to lose control of their actions and surrender to their base urges." The storyteller smirked at that one. "I don't think it took a whole lot of influencing. Think of it; a fit, strong and respected warrior-monk and an undoubtedly fit and healthy young ninja, spending a lot of time together. I guess it doesn't matter; whether you chose to believe the poetic or practical explanation, she eventually wound up carrying their child. However, both had independent visions after their daughter was born and they both decided to keep the child's lineage a secret."
"Perhaps there was no mysticism involved," Yori suggested. "Maybe they wanted to avoid a scandal."
"Possible, but doubtful," Junso told her. "Toshimiru's school didn't require celibacy and it wasn't likely that anyone would accuse him of favoritism. Not only this, there are no records of either Toshimiru or the ninja having more children, and the birth and lineage records are incredibly detailed. Anyway, that daughter grew up, eventually married and had a son...one son and no daughters. Toshimiru's grandson had a daughter...just one child. Every generation, there was just one child from Toshimiru's direct line born. So on and so forth...five generations to each century...more or less, ten centuries to each millennium and two millennia until we get to me, the ninety-ninth generation direct descendant of Toshimiru, just waiting for the chosen one to show up so that I could claim his seed and create the Han...the one-hundredth generation removed from the horny warrior monk and the horny ninja."
"I take it that you don't fully believe the destiny of the Han," Yori commented.
"Oh, I believe it alright," Junso shrugged. "I've seen too many things that defy logic around here to not believe in the supernatural. Like I said, the birth and lineage records for the school are very, very detailed, so I know that my lineage is a long run of only children. There's something very special about this child I'm carrying...and it really pisses me off."
Yori merely quirked up an eyebrow.
"You don't see it, because you're not part of it," Junso growled. "Every time we've met up, you've asked how I was doing, what my duties were, what I wanted to do. That's why I like you so much, you see me. Everyone else?" She waved a hand around her with an expression of disgust. "How is the Han doing today? Have you done your morning exercises, taken your vitamins? Do not stress yourself, you cannot risk the Han." Junso shook her head. "How many times have I wanted to say 'the Han is fine, I'll let you know if it isn't! By the way, the assembly package that the Han currently occupies is also doing well, physically, but is about to deck the next person who asks!'" She took a deep, calming breath. "You even had the decency, to ask how I could be so calm about doing what I was going to do. With all of my instructors up to that point, it was 'this is your destiny' or 'this is the part for you play in the great struggle against darkness.' Back when I was younger, it seemed an honor and not all that difficult; marry the chosen one, have a child. That didn't sound that bad. Then, I found out that I wouldn't even know the chosen one..." She trailed off into silence.
"Do you hate Stoppable-san?" Yori asked, trying to keep any ire out of her voice.
"No," Junso shook her head. "I don't hate him, I don't love him. After meeting him, I'm actually a little fond of him. He seems like a great friend; just not the guy I'd want to sleep with, given a choice." She snorted bitterly. "Of course, he didn't have much of a choice, either. Neither will the Han."
"Perhaps this would be a good time for me to discuss my mission," Yori suggested, trying to get the mood lighter.
"Please," Junso agreed, now digging into the food she had brought.
So Yori told her. She described infiltrating the group of foreign domestic workers, then being selected to serve the Yakuza, then being selected to serve the head of a family. She told about the nervousness, being confined with two guards who, combined, would be able to overpower her. Then, when the criminals let their guard down a little, making her escape while trying her best to cover up what she had done.
"Did you need to serve the master?" Junso asked her.
"No," Yori made no attempt to conceal the relief she felt about that. "He was elderly and such desires that he had were taken care of by a professional."
"This is why I keep trying to corrupt you," Junso told her. "Even though I'm joking most of the time, I want you to live a little. You know that you were given a couple of extra days on your mission so you could have some fun, don't you?"
"I was very out of shape," Yori informed her. "I still am. I need to get back on the dragon course..."
"And get in shape for your next mission," Junso rolled her eyes. "So you can be out there again as soon as a mission comes up. Yamanouchi knows that you get out of peak condition when you're on a mission; the school arranges for the time while you're here to get ready again."
"I find my duties here at the school to be fulfilling," Yori protested. "Why should I seek enjoyment elsewhere?"
"Because you're human and you're supposed to try things!" Junso insisted. "There's more to life than just Yamanouchi...and Yamanouchi knows it!" She shook her head. "If we had known what Leon had planned, you could have taken care of that detail, yourself. Don't pretend that you wouldn't have enjoyed it!"
"I may be naive, but I'm sure that there's more to life than just sex," Yori countered. She blushed at Junso's suggestion; she had been inside the Stoppable home when Leon had seduced the chosen one, using her form. Some of the things had looked...most interesting.
"Then do something different!" Junso demanded. "Spend a night at a club! Hit a beach! Climb a mountain other than Yamanouchi! Visit a museum or see a play! Get into a fight and beat the crap out of a jerk! Live while you are alive!" Junso's expression fell. "Master Sensei and his advisers don't just drink to celebrate a successful mission, they also drink to mourn a disaster. One of my former classmates, Hayato, didn't make it back from his latest mission."
"What happened?"
"I don't have access to the details yet," Junso told her. "But for so many of us, life can be short and dangerous, so enjoy it while you can. Promise me this, that you'll at least experience life while you still can!"
Faced with this earnest plea from her friend, Yori could only agree.
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"Well, that was an interesting week," Monique told her friend. She had managed to swing some work time for Kim, helping to restock Club Banana early on Saturday morning. "I thought it would be great having celebrities in the school but Heather was a pain and Quinn was under the radar for the most part."
"She wasn't a pain," Kim protested. "She just lives a very different lifestyle than the rest of us do." She giggled a little. "It really shook up our home; the tweebs are still selling everything that she even touched on line, and getting top dollar."
"I take it your parents don't like everything in the house being sold off from underneath them?"
"No, but dad managed to turn it into a learning process. He makes them replace what they sold and takes a twenty percent cut from the profits. They're still making money but now we're getting most of our household goods upgraded and dad's getting money to fix the damage they cause. I'd call it an all-around win."
"So, you actually had a mission with the two celebs a couple of days ago," Monique pointed out. "I haven't heard the details yet, we've finished prepping the store and we have just enough time for a latte and a little conversation before the rest of the sales staff gets here."
"So, the mission wasn't one of the save the word sort of things," Kim informed her friend, as the two left Club Banana and made their way to an early opening coffee shop. "Junior was threatening Jimmy Blamhammer, trying to get himself cast as the antagonist in the movie Blamhammer was making about me."
"Okay, you managed to say that without acting all big-heady," Monique teased her friend. "If he was making a movie about me, everyone around here would know about it."
"Well, he was," Kim confessed. "But, back to the mission. You didn't hear about how this whole sitch started, have you?"
"No, and I'm waiting."
"Right, well, Junior decided to steal the Tower of London, so he gathered up some helicopters and flew to New Zealand..."
"Hold it..." Monique interrupted.
"I know," Kim sighed. "It turns out that Blamhammer had built a replica down under for his latest movie. Junior spotted it on a satellite picture and assumed that's where it was. He had his helicopters prepared to hoist the tower and fly off when me and Ron showed up. We attached all the helicopters' hooks together, so they had to set down."
"Wait," Monique interrupted again. "You attached them while they were in flight?"
"Another helicopter, squirrel suits, no big," Kim told her. "Although Ron really stepped up, he's usually a baby when it comes to free fall."
"Not wanting to jump out of a helicopter high enough to kill you if you make a mistake isn't being a baby!" Monique told her. "It's common sense. Most people would never do it and you give Ron grief because he's shook up when he does?"
"Well, he wasn't shook up about it," Kim told her. "He didn't complain one bit. He jumped with me, scampered along cables between the choppers and rode them down to the ground, and seemed to be enjoying himself the entire time."
By now, the conversation was interrupted by the girls' arrival at the coffee shop. The two ordered, picked up their drinks and set course back to Club Banana.
"So, you got all the choppers on the ground," Monique prompted.
"Junior gave up and ran off," Kim shrugged. "His henchmen all asked Blamhammer for jobs, but Jimmy thought that what we had done was amazing, so he decided to make a Kim Possible movie." Kim had to blush a little at the attention, even if it was in the past. "He decided to cast Heather as me and Quinn as Ron, then he told them to shadow us for a week to get into character."
"I have to admit, that made school interesting," Monique pointed out.
"Well, Jimmy invited me and Ron to show up to the first day of shooting and Junior showed up and demanded to be cast as the villain, playing himself. He had henchmen with him to run roughshod over the stagehands and he threatened to destroy all of Jimmy's contacts if he didn't get his way. Sure, it wasn't exactly 'take over the world' evil, but it had Jimmy awfully upset. Anyway, we took out the goons, ran Junior off and saved Jimmy's files."
"That easy?" Monique asked.
"A lot easier that it would have been last year," Kim agreed. By now, they had returned to Club Banana. "Ron has really stepped up. Usually, he would distract some of the henchmen while I got the job done...or maybe he'd get to the doomsday device while I was fighting the bad guys. This time, he took out almost half of the henchmen and handled only two in his usual, Ron style."
"Ron Style?"
"Very, very unconventional," Kim told her.
"It sounds like the two of you are really coming together as a team," Monique gave her a sly look. "Even better than you were before."
"Yeah," Kim sighed.
"Something wrong on the best friend front?" Monique asked.
"Yes," Kim grumbled. "Ever since that moodulator, we haven't been the same. I mean, we hang out, but not as much as we used to. We used to do everything together and while we still do a lot, it's not as close as it used to be."
"We talked about that," Monique reminded her.
"Yeah, about that," Kim took a deep breath. "I just...don't feel that way about him."
Monique's only answer was a steady look while she took a healthy draw from her drink.
"I thought about it," Kim answered the unasked question. "But the more time that went by after that thing shorted out, the less I...I...wanted him...that way. There have been lots of missions since then, lots of rides back all by ourselves. Some of those times, I thought it would be nice to have a boyfriend with me, or at least one waiting for me when I got home but that person is never Ron."
"So lets get this straight," Monique's expression was a great deal less friendly. "It's perfectly fine for him to drop everything to go on a mission with you, even though he's putting himself in situations that he has no business being in."
"He's gotten better!" Kim protested.
"Doesn't matter," Monique told her while holding up her right hand. "I'm ranting here, so don't interrupt. He can go on life threatening missions with you, he can save your date with Mankey when your brothers nearly killed you, he can forgive you for locking him in the janitors' closet..."
Kim flinched at that one.
"And he can give up a job at Bueno Nacho to help you out...and at the end of it spend his bonus on a jacket you wanted...and he's still not good enough for you?"
"It's not a question of being good enough!" Kim protested. "If this was about proving we cared about each other, we'd already be together! It's just...I can't picture him like that! On the flight back from New Zealand I tried to picture what we would be doing if we were together and it just came out...awkward."
"You know there's more to dating than just making out," Monique suggested.
"I know!" Kim threw up one hand in a helpless gesture. "But there's all the other things; the cuddling and other ways of showing and enjoying physical affection...and none of that seems right with him."
"So not right that you won't even try?"
"What happens if it doesn't work out?" Kim almost sobbed. "It's rough enough dealing with the moodulator incident. Do you think I don't want to think like that about him? That would be perfect, the best friend and boyfriend all rolled up into one. But what happens if I...if we...try and it doesn't work out, if it still feels awkward no matter what we try? What happens if one of us meets someone we feel that way about shows up?"
"Girl, I don't think there's a problem with him feeling that way about you," Monique pointed out.
"And don't you think I feel guilty about that?" Kim demanded. "Everything the two of us have gone through together! Every time one of us has dropped everything just to make the other one feel special. I really want to fall for him, but...I...I...just...can't! I know it has to be rough on him, but it's not about not being good enough. He's plenty good enough...he's just not...right."
"Have you explained that to him?"
"No." The fire went out of Kim's posture. "I just don't know how. I'm just hoping that it won't come up again."
"So what do you do if he asks you if you want to be more than friends?"
"I'll have to deal with that if it comes up," she grumbled.
"You better be ready," Monique suggested. "It's going to come up sooner or later. You can say that he's just not your type all day long, but he's going to take it as not being good enough for you and that's going to be rough for him."
"Why did we have to grow up?" Kim mumbled. "It was so much easier when we were kids."
"You know I'll always have your back," Monique told her. "If it comes to it, I'll try having a word or two with him. Maybe if you find a way to describe the situation with a food reference, it'll get through to him."
"Now doesn't seem like a good time for jokes," Kim pointed out.
"Hey, if you can't laugh, you have to cry. You're dealing with a really sad situation and if you don't deal with it right, it could get a whole lot sadder."
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As much as she appreciated picking up a few hours of pay at Club Banana, Kim couldn't blame Monique for not giving her more stable hours. Between cheerleading, other activities, and the world-saving, she wasn't the most dependable of employees. Ron was in much the same sitch...and it was Ron who she was looking for now. His parents were gone this weekend...yet again, something that had her rolling her eyes. She expected to find him either sleeping in late, watching television or maybe playing video games. Instead, she found him in the back yard, working out.
She watched him for a few minutes, reflecting on the fact that he had changed a great deal. Maybe it was something as simple as he finally found some success, which gave him motivation to try harder...which meant more success. He was clearly the best mascot in the district and as an assistant on the missions, he had really come into his own. He had even improved in his academics. Yet, Kim couldn't help but think that something was wrong.
Judging by how sweaty he was, he had clearly been working out for some time; maybe he had been running before this. He was now doing push ups, which he followed with sit-ups and then pull-ups. He was breathing heavily and drenched in sweat when he took a couple of deep breaths and walked towards the back door. Kim stepped around the corner at that point.
"Oh, hey KP," Ron greeted her.
"Hey Ron," she paused for a moment...then decided to just plunge in. "We need to talk."
Ron gave her an odd look, but then gestured towards a couple of chairs on the back porch. Kim was both happy for and irritated by the distraction.
"So, what's on your mind?" He asked her.
"Ron, I'd first like to apologize for something," she started. "Back when you were crushing on Zita, you mentioned that seeing the two of us together might give her the wrong idea. When you said that we might date some day, I said that I never thought I would ever say that you were thinking too much."
She paused, flinching when she saw his face fall just a bit, showing the hurt that that insult had given him.
"I was so wrong to say that," she said. "You've never been a fool, and I shouldn't have said that you were. I'm very, very sorry for that."
He nodded, clearly accepting the apology while knowing that it was leading to something else.
"But...there's something I have to say," she told him. "And this might not be easy for either of us."
He took a deep breath, bracing himself. Well, it was best to get this out of the way.
"I was wrong to insult you, but ever since the moodulator incident, I've taken a long, hard look at us and I have to say that I just don't see us ever taking that path." He was confused and hurt, but she couldn't stop, she had to finish this. "You're a great guy and I don't know why I can't see you as a date, but I can't. Maybe we've been friends so long that I see you more like a brother than a boyfriend but every time I think about us...well...going beyond friendship, it doesn't feel right."
He didn't say anything, he just clenched his jaw and looked at her.
"You were a real gentleman when the moodulator hit me," she hurriedly continued. "You knew that something was wrong and you didn't take advantage of the situation. If you had acted like most boys..."
"Are you sure about that?" He interrupted her. "Why does everyone assume that as soon as some pretty girl comes on to a guy, especially one who's a loser like me..."
"You're no loser!" Kim snapped.
"...he's going to go along with it?" He demanded, not letting her interrupt him.
Kim stopped for a moment, taken aback. She had known that hottie guys like Josh were often selective, turning down even pretty girls like Bonnie for dances and dates. However, and to her shame, she always thought that someone like Ron would jump at any chance for a little affection.
"I don't know why," she answered his question. "And I shouldn't think that way. I'm sorry if I implied that you wouldn't have any control over yourself."
Ron simply nodded, but his expression told her that he had been offended.
"We're getting away from what I was trying to say," she picked it up again. "We've been friends for so long that I just can't see you like that, and I don't want to risk our friendship by trying."
He looked at her for a few more, endless moments. "Fine," he finally said, his sarcasm obvious. "And I really appreciate you coming over here just to let me know that I'm not good enough to date you."
"It's not about being good enough!" She insisted. "I just wanted this out in the open before..."
"Before I try to change things," he finished for her. "Okay, you have a point. There were times I've thought about..." He stopped, conflict on his face before his expression took on a tone of resignation. "Maybe you're right," he finally conceded. "It's probably better that we don't try to move on from being best friends."
Relief almost made her weak in the knees. "It really sucks growing up at times, doesn't it?" She offered.
"Yeah," he admitted. "Sometimes I wish we were still in elementary school. I really miss nap time."
"Well, growing up seems to be doing you some good," she pointed out. "You've really gotten better in the last couple of months."
He offered her an odd look. "Well, I guess the cheerleading and the distraction work was bound to catch up with me at some point." He finally told her. "See you at your place Monday, on the way to school."
"Always," she promised. Then, with nothing else to say, she turned and returned home.
Maybe it was like pulling out a sliver, it would hurt for a short time, then everything would return to normal. She hoped so. But if nothing else, Wednesday was double cheese pizza day in the cafeteria. That was sure to cheer him up.
As always, my thanks to Joe Stoppinghem for beta reading.
