"So, you ready to talk about Ron and the mystery girl?"
Kim looked up from where she had been setting out the spring fashions and stacking the winter fashions for the bargain rack. She knew a question like this was coming up; the timing of Monique's offer for a few hours of work just after she and Ron got back into town was a little too convenient. If there was one thing that Monique liked almost as much as fashion, it was gossip. Or maybe it was the GWA, but it really didn't make much difference; Monique wanted the scoop on Yori and found a way to get Kim alone to provide it.
"There really isn't anything going on between the two of them," Kim told her. "Though if Yori had her way, there would be."
"Okay, that's cruel," Monique complained. "When I ask you a question like that, you're supposed to either give me the whole story or claim you can't talk about it. You're not supposed to give me just enough to make me want to hear more."
Kim could only smile, having confirmed the real reason that Monique had offered her a couple of hours work, late at night. Not that she couldn't use the extra money, and it wasn't that Monique couldn't use the help. It was just nice to confirm that there was an ulterior motive that wasn't really all that ulterior.
"Okay, here's the sitch," Kim told her. "The story they gave at my locker was a cover. Ron had met her in Japan but the school is more than it seems. The...well...headmaster, was kidnapped and Yori showed up to ask Ron to help find him. They needed a reason for Ron to be away from school for a few days."
"She asked Ron for help?" Monique asked. "Not you and Ron?"
"The school has secrets," Kim told her. "They didn't want anyone in on this mission that didn't need to be."
"And you put up with that?"
"What do you mean?" Kim demanded. "I'm not a control freak!"
"You are around Ron," Monique smirked. "You don't like him in on anything that you don't know about."
"Okay, that was harsh but fair," Kim commented. "And it's something that I have to quit doing. I have to start letting him have his own life without me sticking my nose in everything he does."
Monique's expression was one usually only shown when she had eaten something really distasteful, or saw someone wearing white after Labor Day. Kim really figured out why.
"I wasn't jelling because Yori was pretty," she rolled her eyes. "I was jelling because I didn't know anything about her, and she was pretty obviously into him."
Monique continued her skeptical glare.
"We've been through this!" Kim shook her head. "I just don't like Ron that way!"
"Uh-huh," Monique smirked at her. "And did you bother telling him that she was into him?"
"I did my best," Kim told her. "He thought that it was just her play-acting, so I pointed out that she had no need to keep acting when it was just us around. That's when he realized that she really liked him."
Monique looked shocked. "You really mean it, don't you?" She asked. "You really want him to get with someone."
"Why shouldn't I?" Kim was honestly surprised. "He's my friend, and if a girlfriend makes him happier..." A frown showed on her face. "Of course, it will have to be the right girl," she stated, a firm look on her face. "Zita was okay and Tara would have been fine, if she wasn't dating anyone right now. Yori lives in Japan, so it would be better if I found a local girl for him."
"You ever think of just stepping back and letting him find someone on his own?" Monique asked her, a smirk on her face. "Or maybe letting the girl find him?"
"He doesn't understand girls," Kim answered. "Yori was doing everything short of writing 'kiss me please' on her forehead, but he didn't realize that she was into him. I'll have to set him up."
"I still don't know about this," Monique shook her head. "Do you really think he won't see through what this really is?"
"What do you think this is?" Kim now looked defensive.
"A distraction!" Monique snapped at her. "He's got it bad for you, even if he won't admit it to himself. You're just betting that if you can hook him up with someone, he'll be too distracted when you find someone for yourself! You're hoping that he'll never ask himself why it is that after all the two of you've been together, he somehow isn't good enough for you."
"I don't like the way this conversation has turned," Kim noted.
"If it doesn't bother you that you're playing him, think about the girl," the fashion maven continued, in a growl. "Would you like it if you found out a male friend of yours set you up with a great guy, only to find out that it was the friend you wanted, who's not interested in you, that was behind it so you wouldn't stay hung up on him?"
"Do you really think it's just about me?" Kim demanded, after making double-sure that she and Monique were the only ones in the store. "I care about him! He's my best friend, but he wants a girlfriend and that's not something I'm willing to do."
"Because his isn't prime," Monique interrupted.
"Why do you always say that," Kim asked, with no anger. "It isn't about him not being good enough, it's about me not feeling that way about him. Don't you think that I would like to feel that way? It would be perfect; we already know each other really well, we've already come to grips with each others quirks, and my folks really like him. Not to mention, some of the rides back from missions would be some great together time."
"So, you've thought about it," Monique pointed out.
"And it doesn't feel right," Kim grumbled. "Every time I think of being alone with him and...and..."
"You don't need to go into details," Monique told her.
"It just feels so...wrong," Kim finished, giving her friend a grateful nod. "He's the best friend in the world but taking it to the next step..." she flinched.
"It's not that you think he's ugly, is it?" Monique asked. "You really don't think that you're out of his league."
"Of course not," Kim assured her. "Ron would be a great boyfriend...maybe a little unpolished..."
Monique couldn't help but giggle in agreement.
"Maybe we're just too close," Kim continued, shaking her head sideways. "If we had tried this a couple of years ago...maybe. But now..."
"He's too much like a brother to you," Monique finished.
Kim could only nod, miserably.
"So that's why I want to set him up with someone nice," the redhead told her friend. "I want him to find someone who can be that for him, who wants him to be that for her. That way, he won't hold out hope for something that won't happen. I have to help him; not only doesn't he understand girls, he's naive. Bonnie played him when he had all that money and he didn't realize that Tara or Yori were interested in him. All I want to do is make a suggestion, maybe a couple, as see what works out for him." She gave the fashion expert an arch look. "I don't suppose you think he's cute?"
"Hold on!" Monique put up her hand. "That would be just too weird!"
"Oh?" Kim now fixed her friend with a glare. "Now you're out of his league?"
"Not at all," Monique snapped. "It would just be too weird. He's got it bad for you, but I wind up with him while you're my friend and his?"
"Okay, that would be drama," Kim noted. "But if you hear about a nice girl who's lonely for a boyfriend..."
"I'll let you know."
"So, tell me that you took the chance to live while you had the chance."
Yori couldn't help but smile at the voice, the question, and the tone in which it was delivered. Of course, Junso's position within Yamanouchi's administration would let her know when her friend was returning and would be done with her post-mission briefing. Upon turning around, she had to force herself to keep the smile on her face.
"You don't have to pretend for my sake," Junso told her. "I know what I look like. Please, come and dine with me." The older girl held up a couple of boxes and led the way to their usual spot.
"Forgive my ignorance," Yori apologized, as soon as the two were clear of the staff and other students...at least the visible ones. "I do not fully understand the impact pregnancy has upon the body."
Indeed, Junso seemed to have aged; there were dark rings under her eyes and a tired hesitation to her steps and her speech.
"You're not ignorant," Junso sighed. "It appears that The Han absorbs Ki as well as nutrients. I'm being drained in more ways than one."
"Shouldn't you be in the hospital?" Yori was shocked.
"Not according to the doctors, lore-masters...and pretty much everyone in Yamanouchi who's an expert...or thinks he is," Junso shook her head. "Trust me, my friend, Yamanouchi isn't going to take any chances with my health. Not that they really care about me; they want to make sure that I deliver a healthy Han."
"I think that you don't give our elders enough credit for their motivations," Yori gently chided her.
"Oh, they're concerned," the pregnant woman agreed. "And if it was for anything other than The Han, I'd agree with you. The problem is that The Han is so important to them that they're willing to pay any price." She offered one of her insolent grins. "I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or an insult."
Yori didn't know what to say; so she helped herself to some of the food that her friend had provided.
"Anyway, everyone tells me that I should eat right, get plenty of sleep and light exercise and stay at Yamanouchi," Junso explained. "According to all of them, being in a location devoted to the study of Monkey Kung Fu and with the Lotus Blade present, means that not only am I imbued with the spirit of Toshimiru, but his Ki saturates the school. This means that some of the Ki that The Han is absorbing comes from my surroundings, not just from me. Still, I'm more than ready to pop her out; this is exhausting."
"You still feel nothing for the child you are carrying?" Yori asked.
"Believe it or not, I'm getting fond of the little girl," Junso rolled her eyes at her admission. "Maybe it's the hormones and instincts kicking in, or maybe it's sympathy. I didn't have a choice in this matter. My destiny was chosen for me before I was born and it's going to be the same for her. She doesn't want to drain me, but she can't exactly wither away. I hope that she'll be happy with her destiny."
"You seem to have come to grips with yours," Yori commented.
"I've accepted it," Junso shrugged. "This task won't be forever. Just a couple more weeks and I'll give birth and can move on to another assignment. I used to want to just step away from her once that happens, but I've changed my mind. I'd like to be part of her life as she grows up." The insolent smile returned. "Kids are cute, at least when you can hand them over to someone else when they become a handful."
Yori couldn't help but giggle in agreement.
"But enough about me," Junso announced. "What about your trip to first America, then Brazil? Did you take the time to live a little while away from these walls?"
Yori pause a moment, trying to decide just what to tell her friend, even though there wasn't much to tell.
"You don't answer right away," Junso noted. "Does that mean you failed to take some time to enjoy yourself, or does it mean that you enjoyed yourself more than you care to share?"
"Closer to the first than the second," Yori admitted. "While in Middleton, I played the part of a Yamanouchi Student, who wanted to see typical life for a small city teen in the United States, that allowed Stoppable-san to leave his school with no suspicions generated."
"Standard Yamanouchi procedure," Junso grumbled. "I want to hear something...tastier."
"There is not much to taste," Yori told her. "Once we were away from his home city, we played the part of a young couple out on a holiday. I confess that I greatly enjoyed playing the part with him, hanging onto his arm and acting like I was romantically linked to him. However, he seemed reluctant."
"That's more like it," Junso grinned at her. "Tell me more, what did he do that made him seem reluctant?"
"It started when I made initial contact," Yori told her friend. "His parents were not in town, so I infiltrated his home and explained the situation to him. We went over our cover story and he prepared the guest room for me."
"That sounds like a proper host," Junso noted, but there was a grin on her face and a twinkle in her eye. "What did you find disappointing about it?"
"He thinks that we are intimate," Yori pointed out a fact that Junso was perfectly aware of. "I confess to not knowing much about such relations, but would it not have been expected to invite me to share his bed, or perhaps join me in the guest room?"
"Maybe..."Junso's smile was much wider than Yori was comfortable with. "But tell me, what would you have done if he had expected you to repeat what he thought you did with him before?"
"I would have had to maintain the secrecy of our earlier mission," Yori murmured, unable to meet her friend's gaze.
"So, I have corrupted you better than I thought," the older woman almost crowed. "You managed to arrange a situation so that you would have had to do what you wanted to do anyway in order to preserve Yamanouchi's secrets. That's some very impressive self-subterfuge."
Yori could only glare in return, knowing that her friend wouldn't believe any denial. Of course, Yori didn't really know if it would have been denial.
"So, was there anything else that made you a little...shall we say less than satisfied...with the situation?" Junso asked, relieving Yori of uncomfortable thoughts while forcing her to face other uncomfortable thoughts.
"Although we had discussed how we would behave before we left Middleton, Stoppable-san seemed reluctant to play the part," Yori admitted. "I had to initiate the contact. While he supported me in this when I did so, he never initiated the act. Also, when we settled into our room in Brazil, he was most reluctant to share a bed with me. Perhaps I am wrong in believing him to be attracted to me."
"You're serious about this, aren't you?" Junso seemed amazed at the possibility. "Give him a little credit. He has to feel something for you, or that idiot Leon wouldn't have been able to manipulate him by taking your form. He feels something for you, he's just hesitant to do anything?"
"Why is this?" Yori asked.
"Try looking at it from his point of view," Junso suggested. "He believes that you came to visit him a few months ago, when a mission brought you to the area. The two of you had a one night stand, after which you did not contact him again. After that, he doesn't see you again until you need his help for another mission and you don't bring up that night. He probably thinks that you regret it and want to forget all about it."
"I...did not know how to broach the subject," Yori admitted.
"So, do you want to broach the subject with him?" Junso had her mischievous grin again.
"I..." Yori hesitated, starting to blush.
"I don't understand you," Junso rolled her eyes. "You can go under cover in a crime-lord's home, take on his thugs on their turf, but you can't tell a teenage boy that you like him! You can't even admit to yourself that you'd like to make love to him, but you'll do the passive-aggressive thing and put yourself into a situation that if he wants to, you'll be obligated to go along with it!"
Yori couldn't meet her friend's eyes.
"So, tell me," Junso demanded. "Would you like to make love with Stoppable-san?"
"It's...not that easy to answer," Yori admitted.
"Would you mind getting into a romantic situation with him and let it play out however it will?" Junso pressed on.
"That...wouldn't be unpleasant," Yori admitted.
"Okay, you've admitted it to yourself," Junso looked smug. "That means you can admit it to him, if you still feel that way, the next time you see him."
"I find your fixation on my potential romantic life to be very disquieting," Yori pointed out.
"Because I haven't had the chance to have one," Junso told her. She sighed, putting a hand on her extended belly. "In a way, I wish that we would have come up with another plan for making the Han. Maybe we should have introduced me to him and let me take care of everything; at least then I would have had a little fun to go along with the burden. But no, I had to be the proper Yamanouchi student and not do anything naughty, or dangerous, or even unhealthy. Have you ever noticed that most fun things are either naughty, dangerous, or unhealthy?"
"That does seem to be the case," Yori chuckled.
"Well, that's why I'm so interested in your potential love life, and social life, and other potential lives," the older girl stated. "I'd like you to have some enjoyment while you can. You realize that with your undercover work, you're eventually going to have to sleep with someone, don't you?"
"I've...come to that conclusion," Yori admitted.
"THAT'S why I'm pushing you to experiment with Stoppable-san," Junso now had no trace of her usual humor. "Or some other cute guy. Have some fun with it before you're faced with the duty and obligation.
Yori had no response and the silence became uncomfortable.
"Just promise me two things," Junso finally broke the quiet. "First, promise me that you'll live when you get the chance. Tell Stoppable that you're interested in him, or do something else that would have you scrubbing the floors with a mouse's whisker...if you were caught doing it in the school. Do something for YOU."
"That I can do," Yori assured her, and meant it. "What is the second?"
"If something happens to me, please watch over the Han as she grows," Junso requested. "I'm sure that everyone here will keep her healthy and safe, educate her and train her. But nobody's going to teach her that maybe, just maybe, she shouldn't just do whatever she's told."
"But, it is discipline and obedience that allow us to serve Yamanouchi to the best of our ability," Yori stated her lesson, honestly shocked by her friend's words. She had been amused by the minor insubordination Junso displayed and promoted, but having the Han outright disobey Master Sensei?
"And it is through our service that Yamanouchi exerts it will upon the world," Junso rolled her eyes as she recited the rest of the lesson. "Through our dedication and sacrifice, Yamanouchi quietly eliminates would-be warlords, criminals and tyrants. Our blood and sweat allows peace and safety for the world. I know the litany as well as you do; trust me, it was drilled into me from the time that I could understand the words. I just have to wonder about those of us who've been subjected to it."
"I do not understand," Yori was becoming upset. "Is it not an honorable thing that we do?"
"Oh, if honor were were rain we'd all be ass-deep in water," Junso snorted. "We're all honorable because we've never known anything different. Oh, we'll all play a few games; sneak some sake, make some mitsuzo sake when we think our elders don't know about it, or smuggle in a few pillow books and trade them. Hell, we'll even indulge in a few illicit pleasures when we've completed our missions and have a few days, that Yamanouchi conveniently gave us on the way back. In the end, we're all up at the crack of dawn to run the dragon course, we all train and study until we collapse so that we can deliver for Yamanouchi when ordered to do so."
"So what would you have of me and the Han?" Yori demanded. "Would you have me become some self-indulgent layabout? Let me set aside my modesty for a moment; I have encountered many my age in my missions; and I am stronger, smarter and more content than almost all, and it is because of the discipline that Yamanouchi has used to mold me."
"Becoming strong and smart is a great thing," Junso answered her. "And using this for the common good is also a wonderful thing, but my problem is that because Yamanouchi has always had unquestioning loyalty from its students, it has never questioned itself."
"What?" Yori was even more confused...and a little frightened that her friend might have a valid point.
"Look at your last mission," Junso told her. "Not the one to recover Master Sensei, but the one to get the dirt on the Yakuza patriarch. Yamanouchi put you into a dangerous situation without any backup. What if you hadn't made the cut and become the old man's personal maid? Sure, you wouldn't have been killed outright, you would have wound up in a similar situation with one of his subordinates...a younger, less wealthy man who would have probably felt the need to exert his authority over you."
"But I was able to gather information that brought down a human trafficking ring!" Yori protested.
"Yes, but was the risk necessary?" Junso asked her. "For example, how hard would it have been to place an operative as the doorman or on the maintenance staff for the building? That way, you would have had some backup if it all went to hell on you. Instead, Yamanouchi was willing to send you out there, alone, to get what was needed."
"Yamanouchi has limited resources," Yori reminded her. "And there was a need to move when the opportunity arose!"
"Oh, I agree," Junso nodded. "But note that when Master Sensei came up missing, the school was not only able to get you to collect Stoppable-san with an international cover story, it was able to move a strike team first to Brazil and then to the United States, in order to back the two of you up."
"But, it was the head of our school!" Yori gasped.
"Who has multiple subordinates who have as much experience as he does," Junso pointed out. "Our current Master Sensei wasn't the first Head of Yamanouchi, and he won't be the last. The school has a very well-established order of succession. Yes, if we were to lose Master Sensei, it would be a tragedy, but a tragedy that Yamanouchi has prepared itself for well before he rose to the head position. However, because we have obeyed without question for generations, generations of our elders have become used to simply throwing us at problems. Sure, they take precautions but they don't value us as they would have if they needed to actually convince us to do the job."
"Do I detect someone having second thoughts about her role?" Yori asked.
"If you're only detecting them now, I really wonder about your intelligence," Junso snorted. "I'm having second, third and fifty-eighth thoughts about it, but it's a different reason, now. I've read what the Han is supposed to do, and it sounds dangerous. I want my daughter to have a choice, not reflexively follow the orders of someone who reflexively gives them. Sure, she might be destined to defeat the great evil, but I want an elder to earn her loyalty first, then realize just how precious it is."
"You clearly have come to love this child you carry," Yori noted.
"I guess I can't help myself," Junso shrugged, a wry grin on her face. "She may not have been a product of love, or even mad lust, but she's still my daughter."
"And you know you carry a girl?" Yori asked. "Did you have an ultrasound?"
"Oh, I've had the ultrasound," Junso told her. "But I asked to not learn the results. It's just a mother's intuition. It's accurate about half of the time. But seriously, this is what I want you to promise; should I be unable to raise my daughter, make sure that she realizes that she's worth more than just her obedience to Yamanouchi. Make sure that when she's confronted with her task, she realizes that it's her choice to serve or not, and then, she knows that it's her choice how to serve."
"I can do this," Yori agreed.
"But to do this, you have to live it yourself," Junso insisted. "That's why I now ask you, be loyal to Yamanouchi, but know your own worth. Don't throw yourself into a hopeless task, when there is an alternative. Live, so that you can be my friend, help me raise my child, and be there for her if I cannot."
As always, my thanks to Joe Stoppinghem for beta reading.