181.

Ed had gently admonished Sarah for suggesting they go out on the boat when Brooke and her family were on their way, but he and Olivia were absent when the Carisis arrived. Brooke, Sonny, and Sofia were greeted with much fanfare. The kids cheered the new arrivals as if they were royalty and rushed to help unload the car. Even Wyatt and Maggie dragged smaller items such as Sofia's Hello Kitty purse and Sonny's camera bag into the house. They quickly cleared the Subaru and retreated to the back porch. Brooke raised her eyebrows when Sarah offered alcoholic beverages from the small outdoor refrigerator.

"I'm surprised you're alive let alone drinking again," Brooke said after accepting a local fruity beer from her sister.

"We've rallied," Sarah said. "Medicated. Ate grease. Good to go. G? Justin? Agree?"

"I'm good," Justin replied, "But I don't think I drank as much as you." He turned to G and waited for her answer.

"Better," G answered. Following the others' leads, she gulped a sip of her third drink of the day, "This might do the trick."

"Yeah," Sarah said, "And then Dad and Livvie left us here to babysit so they could make a quick trip to the nursery, and of course we're on hour three."

"Where are they?"

"Lunch," Sarah replied in a tone that suggested lunch was not the only reason the duo had been gone for so long.

Brooke shot Sarah her usual eye roll.

Sarah giggled. "I totally would not be suspicious if…" she trailed off and erupted into full blown laughter.

G had been watching the kids like a hawk. They were in the yard, and, their group having grown to four members, Noah saw the opportunity to have even soccer teams and was doing his best to organize a game. However, Sarah's laughter was contagious and she, too, cracked up.

Sonny and Brooke both narrowed their eyes.

"What?" Sonny asked.

"They left something in the shower," Sarah said.

"Why were you in their shower?" Brooke asked.

Justin pointed to the opposite end of the porch, "That one," he croaked.

"We sprayed off the kids after they did their painting and, and," Sarah doubled over and whispered loudly, "The. Lube. Is. In. There."

Finally in on the joke, Brooke and Sonny laughed, albeit with less enthusiasm than the other three.

"They're really not even trying to hide anything are they?" Sonny remarked.

"It seems not, Dominick," Sarah said. "We just left it there…"

"What else are you going to do?" Brooke asked, "Put it here on the coffee table for when they get back?"

"Omigod, omigod, omigod. Can you imagine?" Sarah started laughing uncontrollably again until the beach ball the kids were using for their game came shooting through the air and collided with her head. "OUCH!" She shouted.

Noah ascended the steps in two leaps. "Sare Bear, you okay?"

"Yes, Noey, sheesh, did you kick that?"

"Yep," he said, doing his best to be remorseful but also exude some pride for the home run kick. "It's jus' da beach ball. We use dat one 'cause then nobody gets hurt."

"I am hurt."

Noah came closer and examined all sides of Sarah's head. "No blood," he reported, "Want the Boo Bunny?"

"No, no," Sarah dramatically touched her glass to her temple, "I shall use this. I would like to note this is not the first time you have beaned me."

"Kay." Noah skipped away and back to the game. It had not taken long for his siblings and Sofia to be distracted by a seaplane flying low above their heads. The sound reminded Noah of the jet ski plans. "Hey! We gotta get ready for da rides!"

"We need your parents first!" Brooke shouted back to him.

"We're here!" Ed called. He jogged around the side of the house, "Sorry. We were gettin' the flowers out of the car. Liv's watering them now. Little too late to get em in." He gave Brooke a hug, shook Sonny's hand, and ran into the yard to flip, hug, and kiss Sofia. "Have a good ride down?" He asked whoever was listening.

"Smooth sailing," Sonny replied.

"Good." In a hurry to keep his promise to his son, Ed got to work corralling the kids. "No, Maggs, Wyatt, c'mon, let's get sunscreen and bathing suits on!"

"Whew, thank gawwwd, the natives were getting restless," Sarah muttered, "We thought you'd snuck off to the no-tell motel."

Ed herded the kids into the house through the back door. He winked, muttered "not this time," and let the door slam behind him.

"Omigod, omigod, omigod…"

….

Since the Tucker home was situated close to an inlet, much of the jet skiing usually took place on the intracoastal waterway rather than the ocean. The shore was a convenient place to drop off and pick up, but, unless it was early in the morning, the Atlantic's waves were usually too fierce for the little ones to ride safely. Today's winds, though, were calm and Ed (with Noah) and Justin (with Sarah) zipped back and forth in front of the house. Sonny and Brooke had been offered first dibs, but Sonny was intent on mastering the skimboard after he saw how much Justin and Noah had improved since last summer. Perfectly happy on the blanket, Brooke rested her head on a pile of towels just high enough so she could keep an eye on Sofia playing in the sand with the twins.

"So tell me more about seeing Aidan," Olivia said from under her hat. She sat in a low beach chair and stretched her legs into the sand.

It gave Brooke a great deal of peace to see Olivia so relaxed, and her contentment was contagious. "We were out having lunch and boom there he was! It was so strange. And he looked, well, dark. A lot of black. Scruffy. But, I mean, he sounded okay. I was surprised and probably said all the wrong things. It's really strange he didn't reach out when he moved back. So, I have to conclude, he didn't want to."

"He's had a rough go," Olivia replied.

"Where was he all this time?" G asked. Earlier, when Brooke first mentioned seeing their half-brother, she heard most of the background information but Aidan's whereabouts for the past couple years hadn't come up.

"Texas with his Dad I assume," Brooke said, "I didn't get a chance to ask him much of anything. I'll see if he wants to meet for coffee or something when we get back. I'm not, uh, this sounds horrible, but I'm kind of dreading it and not in much of a hurry."

"It doesn't sound horrible," Olivia said, "It sounds like the truth."

"I don't get why, though. He didn't do anything to me."

"You got really close after your mom passed away," Olivia pointed out, "And you were his parent when you yourself were still processing everything. Gosh, it all came at you in a huge tidal wave. So maybe a part of you associates him with the pain of those months. And, from what you told us, he at least looks like a completely different person. You don't know what you're going to get from him but it's definitely not going to be the lacrosse games and guitar lessons you remember."

Brooke smiled and turned her head toward Olivia, "Thanks for the free therapy sesh. You're very good at it."

"I've been there enough."

A few seconds passed. The twins and Sofia skipped around with sand toys in their hands and tried to outrun the waves when they crashed on shore.

"Olivia?"

"Hmm?"

"How did Dad react when he found out you were in therapy?"

On the opposite side of the blanket in her own beach chair, G squirmed and debated finding a graceful way to excuse herself to go play with the kids. Now would be the perfect time for Wyatt to bring her a shovel or Maggie to call her over to transport a pail of salty water to today's sand construction project. But, there was no such help from the toddlers.

Olivia replied thoughtfully and openly, unbothered by the non-family member in her presence. "He'd always known through work," Olivia said, "It's pretty common for cops to have to see therapists, but, I think the first time we ever talked about me going to an outside shrink for help was a long time before we started dating. I'd had a tough stretch, professionally and personally, and that's when I started seeing someone on a regular basis and not ordered by IAB. After that, when we were together, I think he kind of assumed. I started bringing it up in conversations, or, like, if he would text and ask if I wanted to meet for a drink or dinner I'd text him back and say 'after my appointment' or something like that. He'd ask how sessions went but never pressed me for more information and actually, now I remember him telling me I didn't have to tell him at all if I didn't want to. But...I wanted to." Olivia slid her sunglasses down to the tip of her nose, "Is Carisi giving you a hard time?"

"No," Brooke replied a little too quickly, "I just think he gets uncomfortable talking about it. Like, he changes the subject almost immediately if I bring it up. Last time, I said I was taking Sofia to the nanny share for the afternoon because I had a couple of appointments and the therapist and he replied with 'ok I can bring dinner home' like, as if him bringing dinner was changing the fact I need a therapist and also need an occasional check up!"

Olivia watched Sonny's gangly body battle the waves and the skimboard. Wth his hair wet and hiding the flecks of gray, he could have been mistaken for a teenager. "It can be tough for friends, loved ones, to know how to respond to anyone seeking any type of mental health. There's still a bit of stigma there, or, rather, uncertainty about how to respond, especially when the person is someone they love."

Brooke took a few seconds to absorb Olivia's insight. "It seems backwards that I have to watch what I say so my husband isn't bothered by me going to therapy."

"Is that what's actually happening?"

"I...guess not."

"Maybe you need a different type of conversation. I know it seems like the burden shouldn't be on you to make him feel more comfortable talking about your sessions, but maybe he needs to wade into it. You're sharing a life together. Maybe he needs to know you're not going to rehash everything you say to your therapist and the only thing you expect from him is to be supportive of you taking control of your health. If...that's the expectation."

"It is," Brooke said softly. She broke into an apologetic grin and turned to G. "Sorry for a much too serious beach conversation. New topic!"

"It's okay," G said. She was somewhat sad to hear the conversation end. It was extremely helpful.

"Oh, here they come!" Olivia smiled at the sight of Noah steering the jet ski for the last few yards before they came ashore. Sarah and Justin were still cruising around, now at a faster clip.

Noah jumped down and draped his life jacket over the seat and ran to his mother. "Didja see us out there, Mommy?"

"I sure did!"

"Daddy wants to know if you wanna go."

Ed had not removed his own life jacket and was standing in ankle-deep water smirking at Maggie and Wyatt as they transported buckets of water from the shore to their castle. They paused long enough to explain they were catching sharks.

"Oh, okay," Ed said with a great deal of sincerity, "Careful with the fins and the teeth. They're sharp."

"Imma cuh'ful, Dada!" Maggie said. "You getta shark out dere?"

"Not this time. Maybe me and Mommy'll get one for ya."

Ed put Noah's life jacket in the front compartment and grabbed a second adult-sized one. "Here ya go," he said to Olivia as she approached.

"Thank you."

She put it on and zipped it, but Ed, taking advantage of any opportunity to be close to her, buckled the straps. "Ready?" He asked in a soft, low voice.

"I'm ready, Captain," she replied with a grin and gave him a kiss. On the jet ski she wrapped her arms around his waist and put her chin on his shoulder. "Where're we headed?"

"That little spot on the other side of the inlet?"

"Exactly what I was thinking," she whispered in his ear.

They almost always stopped at a small, secluded cove that was part of the state park. It was difficult to access by land and not big enough for a boating group to comfortably hang out for an extended period of time. Only once had they had to bypass the spot because it was occupied. Once there, they dragged the jet ski's nose onto the sand and hung their jackets on the handlebars.

"C'mere," Ed put his arms around her and gave her a kiss, "I've been wanting to get a minute alone with you all day."

"Didn't we run errands and have lunch together earlier?"

"Seems like a long time ago."

Olivia put her arms around his neck and they swayed together in the warm breeze. "I love you, Ed Tucker."

"I love you," he grinned and asked, "Can I kiss you for a little while?"

Olivia smiled and ran an index finger across his lower lip. "Of course you can." She eyed a spot where a palm provided a sliver of shade. "Over there?"

"Sure," Ed replied, "But you know I'd kiss you anywhere."

Olivia chuckled. "I know. And you have." She took his hand and they made out like teenagers under the palm. Before cruising back home, Olivia leaned back against Ed's chest and peered out into the choppy waters where the ocean fed the inlet. "So perfect," she murmured.

"Hm?"

"This is perfect," she said in a louder voice. "In my husband's arms, under a palm tree, gorgeous blue water, I don't know what else I could possibly ask for."

Ed kissed the side of her head but said nothing. She'd summed up the moment perfectly.

"Before you came in with Noah, Brooke asked me about how you reacted to me going to therapy."

Ed chuckled a bit and wondered where she was going with this topic, "Par for the course for NYPD," he mumbled.

"Exactly what I said. At first. But then I realized, mandated therapy is different from regular sessions, from where I ended up. But you never reacted oddly to me mentioning it."

"I didn't want you to feel like you had to tell me."

Olivia laughed and squeezed his hands. "Wow. Again, exactly what I told her."

"How'd ya get on that subject?"

Olivia needed a few seconds to pinpoint the reason. "Oh, well, she said something about Aidan, then Sonny-"

"-I don't know why it would bother him."

"It's different when the person is someone you love."

"You're right," Ed replied thoughtfully, "Because we want to fix everything and it's not that simple. And also we can't." He leaned his head into hers and held her more tightly.

"You're here," Olivia said. "That part...is simple. It's all I've ever needed from you."

Ed gave her a little nudge. "All?" He teased.

"Okay, maybe not all." Boaters were all mostly headed into the marina now and the sun was starting its descent. "Think we better get back?"

"Probably." Ed eyed the jet ski which had dislodged itself from the sand, "But it looks like we don't have much of a choice."

"Let's go," Olivia said, "I'll drive."

Ed admired her sleek black one-piece, "Fine with me."

….

Olivia turned off Noah's bedroom light and left his door ajar. She grabbed a bottle of wine on her way back to the couch and plucked a glass she'd rinsed earlier from the counter. "Wild Saturday night," she mumbled to herself as she flipped through channels, tried to avoid the news, and then ended up settling on the news anyway. Before she was a mother, on nights like these, she begged for her phone to ring, to be called in to work, because there was nothing else to do. Tonight, she wanted the phone to ring for a different reason. It was eight o'clock. She was bored.

And she missed Ed.

Their relationship chugged along in spurts-a few days of constant contact would be followed by a few days of no texts or calls or after work drinks. Olivia's feelings baffled her. She craved Ed's presence but wanting him around so badly frightened her in inexplicable ways. And now she was furious with her phone because it sat silent when she yearned to see his name pop up on the screen! She ran her fingers through her hair and chuckled sarcastically. It was her own fault he hadn't been reaching out as much as usual. The last time they were together she'd had a bit of a meltdown. The combination of stress, alcohol, and buried trauma coalesced into a profanity and tear-laced rant after which she'd apologized and muttered, "I'm just so tired...and I say that too often."

He'd hugged her and led her from the bar with his arm around her waist. It was the first time she let him do that in public and the contact gave her a palpable boost in strength. It was that feeling she wanted back.

An hour passed and another glass of wine disappeared. Olivia summoned the courage to send him a text. A simple check in. Nothing major. But it made her nervous and felt like a do or die situation. If he was blowing her off, it needed to happen now. The uncertainty was killing her.

Then the phone rang.

It startled her. She jumped and her breath caught in her throat.

Ed Tucker.

She answered with a casual "hey."

"Hey," he said back in his deep, raspy voice. "How are ya?"

"Fine. Well, ah," she stammered and tried to think of some pretext for the call but nothing came to mind. "I was just thinking about you."

"Funny," he said, "I was thinking about you, too."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Been a little worried about you."

Olivia guessed he'd had a few drinks himself. He wasn't slurring his words or anything, but it was not customary for him to admit he was worried even if it was true. "Understandable," she said, "After last time."

Seconds of silence passed.

Too many.

Olivia's heart pounded. What was happening? Should she have just let well enough alone and shut up about it and let Ed Tucker fall by the wayside? At least she could walk away with a friend? Maybe?

"Liv?"

Liv. He called her Liv.

Liv. Liv. Liv.

Her mind raced. Say it again! She shouted in her mind.

"Yes? Sorry. I'm here."

Suddenly, they both blurted out the same question using different words.

"Do you want to stop by?"

"Busy? Okay if I come over?"

Laughter ensued.

"I'm on my way."

Olivia closed her eyes and smiled. "See you soon."

…..

For the first time in a couple of days, the twins and Noah had proper baths and a regular bedtime procedure. They'd been getting hosed off in the outdoor shower and dunked in the hot tub, but Olivia could let this substitute for a more traditional scrub down for only so long. Bodies clean and hair dry, the three were now under the covers and listening to Olivia read the final page of the night's third story.

"The end," she said, closing the book and stifling a yawn.

"Deee end," Wyatt slurred with his fist in his mouth.

"Nighlight?" Maggie asked.

"I'll turn it on when I leave sweet girl," Olivia gave them all kisses and lingered long enough to get a satisfying whiff of baby shampoo, "Goodnight my sweethearts. I love you."

She smiled at the sleepy responses. It had been another fun, action-packed day that lasted longer than Olivia had expected. Sonny and Brooke offered to treat everyone to a meal at the beach pub they all loved in celebration of their first night in Bethany. Noah and the twins were allowed to stay up for a couple of Uno hands, and the adults were still playing games when Olivia took the trio upstairs. Ed offered his assistance, but she insisted he stay and he didn't protest. She had a twinkle in her eye and it was obvious she was craving a little alone time with the kids.

"Mommy?" Noah asked before she left the room, "Did Justy punch a man?"

Olivia whipped around and took a seat on the edge of the bed. The twins were already dozing off, so she spoke in whispers. "Why do you think that?"

"I heard it."

"From Sarah?"

"Uh huh, and Brookey and G."

"Well, sweetie, Justin did hit a man. And we know it's not okay to hit, right?"

Noah nodded.

"But sometimes things happen very fast and, with Justin, he was trying to stop the man from doing something really bad."

"Did Justy get in trouble?"

"He did," Olivia replied, "But it's okay now."

"He said sorry?"

"Well, kind of." Noah yawned and Olivia gave him a kiss and smoothed his hair, "How about you get some sleep, sweet boy, and if you want to talk in the morning we will, okay?"

"Kay."

"And, remember, we love Justy and we know he's a good man."

"And good at da skimboard," Noah said with a grin.

"Yes."

"Better'n Sonny."

Olivia chuckled. "Remember Sonny just got here. Maybe he needs some practice."

"Yeah. We'll prac'tis more t'morrow."

"Okay honey," Olivia smoothed his hair and glanced at Maggie and Wyatt, "I love you. Have a good sleep."

"Kay, Mommy," Noah bunched his blanket under his chin and rolled onto his side, "Love you."

….

Ed returned home from a coffee and bagel run and brought the cold in with him. He had been expecting Olivia to be where she was when he'd left-sitting at the island reading the paper, but she and the paper were gone.

"Liv?" He asked, his jaw still chattering.

"In here!"

Ed dropped the cups and the bag on the counter. She sounded panicked and he hurried to the bedroom where she was sitting on the ottoman with her laptop. "What's wrong?"

"Remember how we were all prepared for the smear campaign when Noah decided to run?"

Ed nodded. The week before announcing his candidacy for mayor, Noah sat everyone down and made it clear he would bow out if his family did not feel prepared for the heightened scrutiny sure to come. Confident there were no skeletons in their closets, everyone gave him their support, assured him they were ready for the road ahead, and volunteered their time. Luckily, the press was friendly to the young, progressive-minded, optimistic candidate, and Noah's pristine background provided little fodder for tabloids so he emerged both victorious and unscathed.

Wyatt's wife's role toed the line between personal and professional. An Ivy League graduate and veteran of two high-profile Senate campaigns, she was the most knowledgeable and most experienced of Noah's advisors. She and Wyatt met at Harvard and had been each other's first and only serious relationship. She was from a small town, charming, chatty and outgoing, and a stark contrast to the more-reserved Wyatt, but the second Olivia met her and saw them together she knew her youngest son had found his soul mate. Not only was she the perfect partner for Wyatt, Ava placed the importance of family above all else. Joining Noah's staff had been her idea. When he won, she became his Chief of Staff.

And now they were all targets of tabloid fake news.

The best of the headlines screamed allegations of an affair between Noah and his brother's wife. The worst implied the Tucker brothers were, behind-the-scenes, at each other's throats and ready to explode any minute after the love triangle was exposed and fell apart. The evidence consisted of a few photos, most likely doctored or altogether photoshopped, of the duo in very close proximity to one another as they often were. Anyone who even tangentially knew Noah and his family would deem the content laughable, ridiculous, and blatantly false and fabricated, but Olivia shuddered and seethed.

"How. Dare. They." She muttered through clenched teeth.

Ed gently took the laptop from her, scrolled through one of the pages, and set it aside. "They're trying to stir up controversy. Sell ads." He rubbed her shoulders, "It'll pass."

"It's disgusting."

"It is."

Olivia jabbed a finger at the closed laptop. "I'm sure one of those pictures is Ava's head on Mia's body."

"Probably is."

"Why aren't you upset?"

Ed peered down at his wife's narrow eyes. "I didn't think it was possible but I should've known better," he said.

"What are you talking about?"

"You're even more beautiful when you're pissed off," he kissed her nose and remained hunched over and close to her face. There were more lines under her eyes and flecks of gray around her hairline, but the freckles and the spunk and the allure were all stronger than ever. So was her fierce instinct to protect her children, but if anyone could talk her off the ledge, it was Ed. She hugged his waist, and he stroked her hair. "It'll blow over," he said, "You want to give him a call? Get a read on him? Part of me thinks he's laughing."

"What about Wyatt and Ava?"

"They might be all having a drink and laughing together."

"Then I want to be there. Or at least know they're all okay."

Ed kissed her again, and, in the silence, they heard one of their phones ringing out in the kitchen. They dashed out of the bedroom like kids on Christmas morning. Olivia reached the phone first and picked up. It was Maggie, but, in her excitement, she sounded a lot more like Sarah.

"Omigod," she said breathlessly, "Have you seen the NEWS?"

Olivia groaned. Ed smirked and put his arm around her shoulders. It was going to be a long night.

….

Either because of the alcohol or because he genuinely didn't think it was a big deal, Ed encouraged Olivia to shrug off Noah overhearing whatever Sarah and the girls had been rehashing about Justin taking and landing a swing on G's former boss. He told her she'd said absolutely the right things to Noah and admitted he probably would not have handled his questions so well on the fly. "Especially since I haven't exactly kept my temper under control all the time," he said.

"Shit," Olivia hissed. "You punched Chief Dodds. I almost forgot."

"He had it comin."

"Why, well, other than he had his eye on Sarah and he got too political, do you hate him so much?"

"He had his eye on you first," Ed replied, "Hated to see that."

"He did not."

"Sure he did."

"Well, the feeling was not mutual."

Ed contorted his face into a pout. "You have no idea how much competition I've had. How daunting it was to even think about the possibility of a drink...alone...without pretext...with you."

"Stop."

"I'm serious."

Olivia knew he was serious. He never made light of all the obstacles hindering their path to each other, but she preferred to emphasize the fact that, in the end, they made it into one another's arms. Forever.

"However fierce the competition was," she said, "I'm glad you kept fighting."

"And I'm glad you stopped fighting." Ed winced. "Sorry, uh, that came out wrong, I meant-"

"-it didn't come out wrong," Olivia said, cupping his face in her hand, "You're absolutely right. You always tell me the truth, Ed Tucker. And you always have." She gave him a sweet kiss on the lips, " I love you for that and so, so much more."

"Happily ever after does exist, huh?"

"Yes it does."

….

#Tuckson