227.
When Sarah, Mia, and Noah barged into the nail salon, they were surprised to find it empty save for the employees. They were immediately ushered to three of the newest-looking massage chairs and given the hand controls. Mia and Noah giggled, pressed the buttons, and let out exaggerated "Ahhhhs," when the panels began pulsating against their small, second-grade bodies. Sarah smiled, selected their mani-pedi services, and handed over her color of choice. She noticed Mia, in her rush to get to the chair, did not select a polish.
"I'll get the same as you, Sare Bear," Mia said. She was not at all interested in moving from the chair.
"Noey," Sarah said, "You don't want colors, do you?"
"Nope," Noah replied assuredly. "But can I get extra salt scrub?"
"Absolutely." Sarah started to instruct the woman who was working on Noah's feet, but she looked up, smiled, and nodded.
"Thank you," Noah said sweetly, lolling his head back and forth, "S'a great day."
"Yeah!" Mia exclaimed, "Cept for school."
Sarah raised her eyebrows. "What don't you like about school?"
Mia crinkled her nose and the movement somehow made her freckles more prominent. Her jet black hair, as usual, was pulled into a tight ponytail. She and Noah were both dressed in their school uniforms. Noah could have changed clothes when they stopped at Sarah's place to drop off their backpacks, but he opted not to since Mia was still in her burgundy and khaki attire. From there they went to get tacos, though not to an outdoor place since the sky gradually darkened as they made their way toward the subway.
"School," Mia began with an exasperated sigh, "Is too much sitting and working. And it's boring. Cept for art and music and gym. Oh and lunch. Do you know what we had for lunch today, Sare Bear? We had chicken wraps and they were spicy! Weren't they spicy, Noah?"
Noah agreed the wraps were spicy, though Sarah wasn't sure he would have disagreed with her.
"You like spicy food, though, right?" Sarah asked, recalling how Mia had devoured two tacos and chips and salsa, all of which had a kick.
"Oh yes! It's just at school the food is bland a lot."
"Bland," Sarah murmured, "You must be learning something."
"Sare Bear," Noah interjected, "Mia jus' thinks it's boring. She still learns."
"Oh, well, then, who am I to judge?" Sarah held her hands up in the air and then apologized to the woman who had started working on her fingernails. "So, what else is going on in your world, Mia?"
"Oh, well, not much," Mia replied breezily, "I wanted Daddy to take me with him to the beach but he's goin' on a private jet with his boss, so I wasn't 'lowed and my mom is buying a horse in 'Tucky-do you know they have blue grass there?- so I'm with Daya. She's Tasha's cousin and she's pretty nice."
"Has she been your Nanny for long?" Sarah asked.
"No. Tasha's comin' back t'night. She went to New Jersey."
"Sheesh," Sarah said, "Your people are all over the place."
"I know," Mia replied.
Sarah tried to get a glimpse of Noah's face. She wanted to see if he was reacting at all to Mia's account and how drastically her home life differed from his. Ed and Olivia frequently took advantage of their family for childcare, but they would never dream of shuffling their kids around like Mia's parents. Noah appeared unaffected. He experimented with the massage chair controls and tried not to jerk his feet when tickled.
"What did you do for Thanksgiving?" Sarah asked.
"We had a feast!" Mia practically shouted. "At the stables. It was grand!"
"Oh, wow," Sarah was heartened to hear this, "That sounds lovely! Was the turkey huge?"
"Uh-huh! But I don't like turkey."
"Why not?"
"It's dry. YUCK!"
"You haveta brine it like my Gramma," Noah chimed in, "She knows how. It took her fifty years but now she knows how to make a good juicy bird that's not dry."
Sarah tried to hold back her laughter but she failed. Noah was, more or less, repeating Caroline's mutterings word for word and was unwittingly doing an impression of her.
"So now comes Christmas," Mia said, "And my winter r'cital. You gonna come see it, Sare Bear?"
"Where is it?"
"Carnegie Hall."
"You're performing at Carnegie Hall?" Sarah asked incredulously.
"Yep."
"We shall go," Sarah said, "Noey, we must find out the date and we shall buy fancy clothes for the night out on the town."
"Kay. What's da date, Mia?"
"It's…." Mia looked to the ceiling and screwed up her face, "One, two, three, four…four days b'fore Christmas!"
With the hand that wasn't being manicured, Sarah grabbed her phone. A quick Google search confirmed Mia's information. "December twenty-first," Sarah said, "I've put it on my calendar. And I'll get us tickets, Noey. Shall we invite everyone?"
"Those babies might be too hyper," Noah said, "But…they like music. Is it a singalong, Mia?"
"You can sing along if ya want!" Mia said, "We're practicing all kindsa songs! Like Frosty, and, um, some other ones. And there's gonna be some dancing, too. I have to sing and dance ballet. I like tap better but we're doin' ballet for this one."
"Maybe Maggs and Wyatt can come…" Noah murmured.
"We'll make it a family affair," Sarah typed a one-handed text to their group chat, "We will all attend. We won't make you nervous, will we, Mia?"
Mia turned to Sarah and regarded her as if she'd asked one of the world's dumbest questions. "Sare Bear, itsa per-form-ance. There's always a lotta people. You don't even see 'em when you're on the stage! It's jus' one big glob out there! And then they clap. That's awesome."
Recalling how she broke out in a cold sweat when she had to speak in front of more than ten people, Sarah reached over and playfully tugged Mia's ponytail. "You're a star, my dear," she said, "A seasoned star. This show shall be the highlight of my year."
"Sare Bear," Mia said, "Santa is the highlight!"
"Oh yes, of course, I forgot."
Mia chuckled. "Good thing you're not Santa with all that forgetting!"
Noah and Sarah both started laughing.
"Yes," Sarah said, "Good thing."
….
Ed slid his arms around Olivia's waist and gently pried the dish towel from her hands. He kissed her neck and hummed into her skin. "Come back here with me," he whispered, tugging her toward the back of the apartment.
Olivia turned around in his arms and gave him a kiss. "They're going to be back soon," she warned.
"They're getting their nails done," Ed countered, "And the two other ones are finally asleep. They're out. Conked out. We have at least a half hour, which, isn't much, but it's…something. Whaddya say? Can ya give me a half hour, Benson?"
Ed tugged on her waistband and an expression somewhere between a smirk and a pout crossed his face. That, coupled with his use of Benson, made her heart flutter. The use of the surname she exclusively used for almost half a century always harkened back to the days before they got together. It reminded Olivia of how they came to be as a couple, and it was an effective strategy. She grinned, gave him a kiss, and led him to the bedroom.
The lovemaking was quiet, sweet, and tender with no hint that anyone was rushed. Ed loved seeing her in the afternoon light, and Olivia could never get over how proud, smug even, Ed looked after they finished. His eyes danced. He smiled. He kissed whatever skin was available to him-this time it was her shoulder-and even though Olivia was facing away from him, she pictured his face. He couldn't help himself. The amount of love he had for her was immeasurable.
"Do you remember, how, when we first got together, we would sneak afternoons like this?" Olivia asked in a husky voice, "Or after work?"
"Of course I remember," Ed replied fondly, "Loved those times. I love this more. But that…yeah, it was fun. Exciting."
"Are we still exciting?"
"We're very exciting."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes," Ed said confidently, "Every day with you and the kids is a new adventure. It's more excitement than I envisioned five, ten years ago."
"When you put it that way," Olivia replied, "You're absolutely right. Makes total sense. I don't think, even when we first started seriously dating, we pictured this."
"I didn't. Well, maybe, in a fantasy world I did, but…"
Olivia turned to face him, bit her lip, and finished his thought, "Your fantasy came true."
"Nah," Ed shook his head and grinned, "It's better. Who gets that? Who, in their life, gets that?"
"Not many people I suppose."
"Nobody I know."
"We really are lucky, Ed Tucker," Olivia cooed, smiled, and kissed him.
"Yeah we are." Ed grinned at the sounds from the twins' bedroom. The three-year-olds were stirring. He glanced pointedly at the clock. "Look at that. They gave us forty minutes."
"Love those kids."
"Me too."
….
Maggie flopped down on a towel next to her mother and laid flat on her back. Her wet hair flew in all directions and she breathed heavily. Olivia smiled and handed her a bottle of water. "Need this?" She asked.
"Yes! Thank you! Those kids are wearing me out!"
The smile remained plastered on Olivia's face. She agreed wholeheartedly. After a day at Crab Island, Olivia was certain everyone, especially the youngest among them, would be spent, but Anthony and Mari went directly from the boat to the beach without stopping. Two-year-old Mari did ask for a snack, but she grabbed a Go-Gurt and toddled after her brother. Olivia waved off the others and said she didn't mind looking after them. Maggie grabbed the towels and the bag of sand toys and came along.
"So I take it you're not going to be interested in earning money babysitting?" Olivia asked her daughter while keeping her eyes on Anthony and Mari who were playing with their buckets and shovels nearby.
"Ugh. Can't I do something else to earn money? Like work at the Center?"
"We'll find something for you to do," Olivia promised, making sure to say no without actually saying no. The Benson Center wasn't an appropriate placement for a girl as young as Maggie. "What are you hoping to buy?"
Maggie shrugged. "I just want to have money in my bank account for emergencies."
"Ah, well, that's very wise," Olivia said, stifling a laugh. A few weeks ago Maggie got a glimpse of their bank account balance while Olivia was paying bills online and Maggie gawked at the balance. Ed joked that they had more stashed away in another account for emergencies, and the statement obviously made an impression on Maggie.
"Probably Sofia will have a job before me…"
Olivia turned to her daughter and curiously furrowed her brow. Maggie didn't need prompting. This look always meant she had to start talking.
"Sof got her period so that's why she was so weirder than normal on Crab Island."
Olivia had already learned this information from Brooke, but pretended otherwise and also ignored her daughter's shady comment. "Oh? Wow…but…why are you jealous?"
"I'm older," Maggie explained, "I'm supposed to be first!"
"Well, with periods, you never know. Age doesn't always matter."
"I guess I wanna get it over with," Maggie said, "All my friends and me just want the waiting to be over, ya know?"
"I know…at least, on the bright side, you're prepared for when the day comes. You're not afraid."
"No but I have a feeling I'll be annoyed!"
"Probably," Olivia said, chuckling. "Would it make you feel better if I got you a job before Sofia?"
"Yes!"
"I'll work on that."
"Thanks, Mom. You're the best."
"You're welcome, sweet girl. Anything for you."
…
When he retired, Captain Ed Tucker left all IAB files neatly stored in evidence boxes or fireproof cabinets depending on the nature of the case. Other things, mostly notebooks of various sizes and legal pads, he took with him as most cops did when they retired. Some people destroyed their personal writings, but many kept them in garages or other storage spaces never to see the light of day again. Ed stored his items in the walk-in closet on a shelf above his pared-down collection of suits and had forgotten about it until the new boss at IAB gave him a call one afternoon asking about an old case. Olivia knew immediately when she walked into the room that Ed was troubled.
"What's going on?" She asked as she took a seat at the foot of the bed.
"Some obscure old case I worked," he muttered with his nose halfway in the old evidence box.
Olivia waited for more information, but Ed only kept rifling through the files.
"Honey?"
"Oh, yeah, sorry," Ed finally looked up and removed his reading glasses, "This is bugging me. I can't find anything."
"What are you looking for?" Oddly enough, Ed had not been very forthcoming with the details of the request. Olivia reasoned that Ed probably thought he could easily find his old notes, but that was clearly not the case.
"I remember it…weird case. You probably remember it, too."
"What was it?"
"Cal Cutler ring a bell?"
Stunned at how quickly she recalled the name, Olivia flopped backwards onto the bed. "How did IAB get that case? And yes, it does."
"Well, what you didn't know then is that the ex-cop who was arrested, she said Cragen knew about it all. She said she went to him one night when they were both drinking, upset, and the two of them concocted, or, well, discussed potential, hypothetical scenarios about killing the guy's wife."
"Really?" For a second, Olivia was caught up in the salaciousness of it all, but she quickly came to her senses. "She's lying. She's sick of prison and she's lying."
"She's already dead," Ed replied without an iota of emotion. "Her sister's filing suit. And we did investigate Cragen but it was all BS. From what we could tell, the two of them crossed paths once, at a fundraiser, and they were never alone together. And, it was after Cragen quit drinking. So…there's nothing there. But I guess they want everything. The sister's suing for ten million."
"Unbelievable," Olivia said, shaking her head, "What was this, twelve years ago? Why is she bringing the suit now?"
"They lost everywhere else. Now she's alleging the DOC ignored her medical needs and caused her death."
"They get sued all the time," Olivia said, "Why are they taking this one so seriously?"
Ed smirked, "Maybe because, on that part of it at least, they have something to hide."
Olivia sat up, and the look on her face suggested she was worried about Ed wading back into his IAB days. Long ago he admitted to her there were parts of his job he hated but there was never room for compassion on his part. IAB was black and white. Always. But cases were almost always more complicated.
Perfectly reading her body language, Ed sat down beside her and squeezed her hands. "As soon as I find my notes, my part in this is over, Liv," he said in a reassuring voice. He wanted to gently explain that she was the one more likely to be bothered by old cases than him, but he kept the sentiment to himself.
Olivia scrunched up her face. "I don't…I don't remember seeing much of you then," she said.
"Wasn't that, uh, around the time you were, uh…the biker gang thing?"
Olivia smiled, "Look at us," she cooed, "I've almost forgotten you arrested me."
Ed winced.
"But seriously," Olivia patted his arm, "After that, you weren't around us much."
Ed took a minute to think. "Oh, yeah…that was when I was working with major crimes. They had a bunch of people undercover and they borrowed me to handle one of them. It took over a year. And I almost missed Sarah's graduation."
"Oh, no…"
"Almost," Ed emphasized and kissed her cheek, "I made it. I think I managed to make almost every big moment. If there was one good thing about IAB, it's that the hours were predictable for the most part."
Olivia nodded. "Everytime I feel like I'm missing the job, I think about how we're not going to miss anything. Nothing, at least nothing job-related, will hold us back."
"You're right," Ed replied softly, "But you know what my favorite part is?"
"What's that?"
"You don't have to beat yourself up about missing anything," he said, "Kind of the same thing, but…"
"...but not."
"No."
Olivia smiled, gave him a kiss, and patted him on the leg. "Let me know if you need anything," she said, getting up, "I'm going to get the twins' snack ready. They'll be up soon."
"I certainly liked their naptime the other day better," Ed quipped.
Olivia shot him a seductive wink, "So did I, but…tomorrow's another day."
Ed exaggerated a chill, smirked, and got back to work.
…..
After a few months of dabbling in the undercover world, Ed Tucker was happier than usual to meet Cole and another colleague from IAB for a drink. Tucker wasn't undercover-he was only helping to oversee the operation to make sure NYPD's ducks were in a row-but he felt disconnected all the same. He greeted the two fellow officers with hearty handshakes and ordered a bourbon without specifying a brand. This bar was so divey it only carried one.
"Thanks for meeting here," Tucker said, "Needed to be off the beaten path just to be safe."
"This is certainly off," Draper joked.
The other officer, Nick Whitaker, nodded and looked around. "This is the definition of dive," he said, "I like it."
The men made small talk about the Knicks and Yankees and about their families, but the conversation inevitably turned to work. "You hear about that fire?" Whitaker asked, shaking his head. He had two daughters and the account hit him hard. "Those poor kids…I can't believe the guy did that…to his own girls."
"There's more to it," Draper said, "They're not done investigating. I don't think any of us want to believe he did it. But…"
"Sometimes the worst is true," Tucker added.
Cole chuckled sarcastically, "You hear about Stabler?"
"Now what?" Ed groaned and took a long sip.
"Lit a fire in interrogation," Draper said.
"What the hell?"
"I don't have all the details. The commissioner said to leave it alone," Draper rolled his eyes, "That Jo Marlowe has some pull somewhere. She's got dirt on someone. She walked into this case and all of a sudden they're all at her beck and call."
"Marlowe was Stabler's partner, wasn't she?" Tucker asked.
Cole nodded. Noticing Whitaker, who was at least a decade younger, looking confused, he explained, "We have a long history with Elliot Stabler. We know way too much about him. And his partners. And SVU for that matter."
"He was partnered with Marlowe and Benson?" Whitaker asked. "Damn….lucky guy."
"Not lucky for them," Tucker replied, "Part of their job is makin' sure he doesn't fly off the handle."
"I dunno," Cole said, "Marlowe was almost as bad as he was. Benson's more controlled."
"Benson," Whitaker whistled, "I'll take her as a partner any day."
Ed had known Whitaker for a few months and had neither a negative or positive opinion of him. However, the longer he was in his company, the more the guy was getting on his nerves. To make Whitaker's comment even more obnoxious was the fact that he was a wiry wisp of a man with a face so narrow it looked like it had been compressed with a vice. The guy's physical appearance did not come close to matching his confidence.
Draper didn't keep his sentiments to himself. "She'd eat you alive," he told Whitaker with a chuckle.
His ego bruised, Whitaker scowled.
"Ah, relax," Draper jostled Whitaker's shoulders, "I'm speaking from experience. We've gone toe to toe with her many times. She's no pushover. She's fierce."
Tucker nodded in agreement. He thought about how the last time he saw Benson was when he arrested her. He remembered she'd been sick. He wondered how she was doing. Of course, she had recovered from the illness but he wondered how she was doing with the trauma of almost being locked up forever for murder. Tucker wanted to believe she was so tough she shrugged it off and moved on. But he couldn't believe it, and he felt guilty that he was part of one of the worst things that had ever happened to her on the job.
…
Of all the rooms in the Tucker home, the twins' view was the worst. When Ed and Olivia purchased the apartment, they were a family of three and more children, though they had not been officially ruled out, seeming unlikely if not improbable. Yet, a little over a year after closing, they brought home two tiny infants. Maggie and Wyatt spent their first month in the bedroom with their parents. Neither Ed nor Olivia were thrilled about the idea of letting the babies sleep across the apartment from them, but Noah was already settled in his room and it felt wrong to displace him. Their building was secure. Their home was safe. So, Ed and Olivia reluctantly tucked the twins in each night in their cribs in the room that was designed to be an office.
The room was large by city standards and had a closet. There was enough room for the cribs, then the toddler beds, two bureaus and a changing table, which wasn't very necessary any more but remained in the room.. Above the table was the one, small, narrow window that overlooked the narrow gap between buildings. Maggie's and Wyatt's view was mostly gray stone and brick. Nevertheless, it was the twins who were the first in the family to witness winter's first snow.
Ed and Olivia heard them through the baby monitor-another remnant of infancy that they couldn't quite relinquish-and turned on the video. "Oh my…" Olivia murmured. She kicked herself out of the covers and made a beeline for the twins' room. She needed to witness the moment for herself, not through a screen. Ed followed.
The door was open just enough for them to see and hear what was going on. There they were, clad in similar striped pajamas, describing the flakes in hushed voices. It was only when Wyatt pressed his face to the glass and let so much of his weight fall against the window that Olivia entered the room. She was worried the furniture would slide and the sweet scene would end in a nasty fall.
"Mama!" Maggie said, jabbing her finger at the pane, "SNOW!"
"It is snowing, isn't it?" Olivia hugged them both and kissed their heads, "Good morning, sweet twins. What a pretty morning!"
Maggie and Wyatt continued their commentary while their heads were pressed against their mother's body. The chattered about snowballs and snow angels and snow men and then, suddenly, Wyatt stiffened and his eyes grew wide.
"Gah'tell'NO!" He insisted.
Ed grinned and stepped forward. "Noah's still asleep, bud," he said, "We can show him-"
"I'm here!" Noah said brightly as he charged into the room. I was watchin' da snow, too! Are we gonna get enough to go sledding?"
"SLED!" Maggie shouted, squirmed to get down, and threw herself around, mimicking sliding down the hill.
Ed almost said they would need significantly more snowfall for sledding, but in a matter of minutes the gentle flakes began falling in a bone fide snow shower. "Well…maybe. Where's the sled, Liv?"
"In the storage room downstairs," Noah answered before Olivia could open her mouth.
"Let's bundle up and go out for some eggs," Ed suggested, "And if it looks like there's gonna be enough snow, we'll head back out."
Wyatt and Maggie were already in their closet digging out their parkas and snow pants which had arrived the week before Thanksgiving. Olivia had been proud of herself for not waiting until the last minute to get the kids' cold weather gear. Up until today, though, they had been plenty warm in their fleece jackets. They hadn't even needed mittens on the commute to and from school or on errands. So, she was skeptical about the snow sticking enough for sledding.
"Do we have to order eggs, Daddy?" Noah asked.
"Nope. You can have whatever you want. But I want protein."
"Yeah, dat fills ya up and makes your muscles strong," Noah said, turning toward his bedroom, "So I'm gonna have eggs too."
"We'll do pancakes for dessert," Ed called after him.
Noah waved a thumbs-up before he disappeared into the hallway.
Olivia rolled her eyes. "They're going to be crushed when they realize dessert at breakfast is not the norm."
Ed shrugged. "Or, maybe, for them…it'll always be the way breakfast is done."
"Yeah," Olivia kissed his cheek, "I like your version better."
…
#Tuckson