230.

As Ed and Olivia ushered their brood into an aisle of red velvet Carnegie Hall seats, both parents immediately questioned their decision to bring the twins. Sure, this was a youth dance and choir show, but the performance hall itself radiated an ambience that screamed no kids allowed. Awestruck, Noah leaned back and carefully examined the architecture and design. He would not say a word until the lights dimmed. Maggie sang the first few bars of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer but substituted each family member's name for the title character. When she sang "Wyatt the red-nosed reindeer," she reached over and bopped her brother on the nose. Perpetually unfazed, Wyatt smiled, made a face like he was going to sneeze, and went back to watching the other members of the audience file in. Eventually, he caught a glimpse of two familiar faces and he twisted around in his seat.

"SareBear!" He said in a low, raspy voice.

Olivia smiled at him. He wanted to yell and wave, but Wyatt understood this wasn't the place for that type of behavior. Maybe it was foolish of them to question their decision to bring the little ones. Olivia followed his gaze and waved at Sarah who broke into a relieved smile when she saw her family.

"Hi everyone," she said as she shuffled down the aisle and took a seat next to Wyatt. "You all look lovely tonight."

"Thank you," Olivia said in a hushed voice. She appreciated the compliment, for she had carefully dressed everyone in greens and reds.

"Where's Justin?" Ed asked.

"Nice to see you, too, Daddy," Sarah replied, "Justin's sick, so he's home in bed."

"Puking?" Noah asked.

"Nope. A bad cold. So I locked him in the guest room."

Noah giggled.

"Well, I hope he feels better," Olivia said.

"I'll pass along the well wishes." Sarah opened the program and her eyes grew wide. "Whoa. No shortage of entertainment tonight, huh?"

"Mia's number is before intermission," Ed remarked, "We might head out then."

Perusing the long list of acts, Sarah nodded in agreement.

The show began with a medley of songs including Winter Wonderland and Silver Bells dancers costumed as snowflakes whirled around the stage and it was only a few minutes before Maggie was on her feet, doing her best to follow the moves in the narrow space in front of her seat. Three other performances followed before Mia's children's choir took the stage. Olivia whispered to Noah. "See her, sweetie?"

"Yup!" Noah smiled. "Right there! She's sparkly!" Indeed, Mia and the others were dressed in shimmery silver, gold, green, and red dresses for the girls and suits for the boys.

"She sure is," Olivia replied seconds before the group began singing It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year.

When the song came to the pre-chorus, Mia stepped forward for a solo. She belted out the lyrics like a pro and when she sang "scary ghost stories" her voice dropped a note and she grinned slyly. It was cute and clever and later the adults would all agree that Mia sang with the confidence and disposition of someone much older. Her group performed two more numbers, and when they finished the audience gave them a standing ovation. Noah jumped up and down as he clapped and cheered for his friend.

Sarah wiped tears from her eyes. "That was amazing," she murmured.

Through the clamor, Olivia heard her. "Sure was," she said, still grinning from ear to ear. "So talented…"

When the show finally reached intermission, everyone was ready to go. Noah and Sarah were starving, the twins were getting restless, and Olivia and Ed admitted that despite the show's superior quality, it was much too long. Ed ushered the family to the lobby and they were heading toward the exit when Mia's father called out his name.

"Hey," he said rushing over, "Don't blame you for sneaking out."

"Yeah, uh," Ed glanced pointedly at Maggie and Wyatt and started to lay all blame on the three-year-olds, but Tony shook his head, commiserating.

"Do you have a minute to see Mia? She was so excited about you coming."

"Daddy, can we?" Noah asked.

"Of course."

Tony led them through a door and down a corridor. They made a left and then a right and finally heard kids' voices. Tony ducked his head into a room and waved his hand. Mia appeared, still wearing makeup but she had traded her dress for leggings and a tunic. She nearly knocked Noah over with the force of her hug.

"Hiyeeeeee!" She squealed.

"Hi," Noah croaked. He patted Mia's back politely until she decided to end the hug.

Next, Mia crouched in front of the twins and tickled their chins. "Hello babies! Goochie, goochie, goo!"

Maggie and Wyatt blankly stared back at Mia. Ed couldn't help but laugh softly. Sarah and Olivia were too wrapped up in complementing Mia to notice, but the twins clearly were annoyed, shocked, or maybe offended that Mia didn't seem to realize they were no longer infants. With a knuckle, he poked their cheeks and smirked at them when they looked up. "You remember how to get outta here?" He asked them.

"Issa maze," Wyatt replied.

Maggie zig-zagged around. "I'lost! I'lost!" She erupted into giggles, and, dizzy, bumped into Ed. Then, she asked for ice cream.

Ed picked her up, kissed her on the cheek, and promised ice cream after dinner. Maggie twisted in his arms and called for her mother. "Mama! Gah'go!"

"Be patient," Ed whispered, "Mommy's talking to Mia because she did such a good job singing. Remember?"

"Dinnit sing Rudolph!"

"Well, uh, no…"

"Da re'nose reindeer!"

"Yes, I know, that's the one. We'll sing it in the car, how about that?"

"Sing Rudolph ten times!"

"Ten times," Ed repeated, "Got it."

Maggie lifted her chin and a smug smile formed on her face. From her perch on Ed's hip she watched Olivia, Sarah, and Noah say their goodbyes. She tapped her fingers on the back of Ed's neck, and, unwilling to wait for the car, started softly singing Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer once again.

…..

Fin checked in with Benson once more before he left and suggested they go grab a drink. Having worked extra duty while Carisi was undercover, Fin was exhausted himself and wanted to go home, but he also wanted Olivia to get out of there as well. The boss, though, wasn't ready to leave. "I need to get these finished," she said, nodding at her computer, "Almost there. And I have Lucy on the clock, so, I'm good, Fin. See you tomorrow."

With that, Fin left.

Olivia went right back to pounding the keys, making sure to characterize the decision to put Carisi in the homeless shelter undercover was made with the utmost care and as much due diligence as possible. She wrote the details from memory and grew more confident as the timeline came together in front of her. The case, the bust, and the arrest were all clean, but anytime she had to investigate any arm of the justice system-even a halfway house-there was potential for trouble. She caught a second wind and smiled. The case would be officially closed on SVU's end tonight after all.

The knock on her open door didn't startle her, but her expression must have suggested otherwise. There was Ed, looking apologetic, standing there with two coffees cups in his hands. He was dressed in his typical dark suit, white shirt, and tie which he'd loosened. He appeared slightly disheveled-as if he'd been working late, too, and had fallen asleep at his desk.

"Tucker, um, Ed," she said, smiling and removing her glasses, "What are you doing here?"

"I, uh, went to your place," he said, "Was in the neighborhood on a call and thought I'd stop by but Lucy said you were still here. So, I figured," he held up the cups, "You might need something fresher than what's in the break room."

"Thanks."

Ed examined the cups for any type of labeling. Finding none, he took a sip of one, frowned, and handed it over. "This one's yours."

"You would think there's vinegar or something in there," she joked. "But thank you."

"You're welcome. Mind if I sit?"

"Not at all."

Olivia rolled her neck in circles. She had been sitting for too long on this particular day. Noticing her movement, Ed stepped past the chairs and rounded her desk. He carefully parted Olivia's hair and started giving her a gentle neck massage. "There's no one out there but the desk sergeant," he said softly.

"Mmmmm," she said, "I don't care. That feels so good."

Ed smirked. She did care. And the fact that he knew exactly what she needed so much so that she ignored her own rules was thrilling. Ed had no idea how to perform a proper, by-the-book neck rub, but he pretended he did, and he felt her muscles respond. Every few seconds she would sigh or moan. It was almost as satisfying as making love to her.

"What were you working on?" He asked.

"The shelter paperwork."

"Oh…yeah…shouldn't be too much there?"

"No…I am adding that Carisi has agreed to see a therapist. Rollins came to me in confidence-which I'm doing a great job keeping-and told me some things he said about the guys in there. Nothing major, he, uh, Carisi has a big heart, and I don't want him confused about who the bad guys are and who they're not."

"Sounds like maybe he needs to talk with you more. But, yeah, anytime anyone's undercover it's a good idea for them to see someone. Even if it's once or twice. It's certainly cleaner for us…if somethin' comes up."

"And let's not forget the actual person who needs the therapy," Olivia replied.

"No, no…not forgetting him. But, uh, yeah, you caught me…the first thing I think about when I hear shrink or psychologist or whatever is jumping through hoops, ticking boxes to get off the desk and back to work. Not sure if that instinct's ever going away from this old cop."

"That probably means…when you've had to see someone, the box checking was all you needed," Olivia said graciously. She knew Ed constantly worried about right and wrong things to say to her and sensed he was nervous about wading into therapy talk, especially since he knew about how important it had been and was still to her.

"Maybe…" Ed kissed the top of her head and, in doing so, caught a glimpse of the screen. "How about I let you get back to work and then I'll walk you out?"

"I probably have another hour…maybe a little less."

"I'll wait." Ed smoothed her hair back in place and grabbed his coffee off the desk. He slightly removed the lid in an exaggerated show to make sure he was taking the right one. "I'll be in the break room. Take your time."

Fighting the urge to jump up and hug and kiss him, Olivia gave him a wide, appreciative smile instead. "Let me know if anyone gives you any trouble in there, Captain."

Ed smirked and nodded. "I will, Lieutenant. See you in a bit."

….

A bartender wearing a Santa hat set two glasses of bourbon in front of Ed and Cole, nodded, and moved on to other customers. Ed chuckled. "The hat and the attitude don't quite agree with one another," he remarked.

"No they do not," Cole said. He held up his glass. "Well, cheers to our annual holiday cocktail."

"Cheers," Ed replied. "Has it really been a year since we saw each other?"

"It has," Cole replied as he started to laugh, "So, how ya been?"

Joining him in laughter, Ed reported all was well in his world. He talked about each of the kids, Sarah and Brooke included, his mother, the beach house, and their upcoming spring trip to Italy. They easily fell back into their old routine of banter and cynicism as the conversation shifted to current events and news headlines. After they ordered their second round, Ed suddenly realized Cole hadn't said anything about his wife or his daughters.

"Hey," he said, "How are Jeannine and the kids?"

"Kids are good," Cole reported. "Both working in finance. Out of our house finally." He smirked, took a sip, and continued, "Jeannine, well, that's another story."

Ed watched his friend's eyes cloud over. Whatever was wrong clearly pained Cole. Ed's eyes darted around as he waited for Cole to continue.

"Trying to get her meds right," Cole said, seemingly starting in the middle of the explanation, "Three months ago, I had to get her in on a 72-hour hold…she's, uh, she's not doing well at all. I was worried about leaving her today. Every day…it's a gamble whether or not she's gonna be there, one way or another, when I get home."

The news stunned Ed, and he was shocked he was able to remain upright on the stool. Suddenly, his throat was dry and his head spun, searching for the right words to say to console, or, rather, offer some sympathy to Cole. Ed had been raised in a time and in a household where silence and privacy reigned. It wasn't proper to discuss the business of others, particularly when it came to health and especially when it came to mental health. The phrase mental health had not even made an appearance in the vernacular until Ed was well into his career. Olivia had helped him see past the stigma surrounding mental illness, and he wished she was with him now. She would know exactly what to say.

"Cole, Jesus…"

"It's been hell, Ed. And it came on…so sudden. And nobody has answers. One day, I came home from somewhere, I don't even remember, and she was sitting on the porch, staring. Just staring. And when I tried to touch her, she screamed. Had to do a seventy-two hour…and it's been up and down ever since."

Ed and Cole locked eyes. Ed could tell his former partner was begging him not to ask about or state the obvious-that whatever was afflicting Jeannine may have manifested itself suddenly but had been roiling within her mind and body for years. Ed was sure Cole obsessively replayed his entire marriage searching for signs, clues, and moments when he could have behaved differently. He knew because he would be doing the same thing. He would do exactly that until the day he died.

"Today she's with a friend antiquing," Cole said, "So, today, I don't have to worry. As much."

"Anything in particular you want to do?" Ed asked.

Cole glanced at the television. "I want to sit here and bitch about the Knicks," he said.

"They blew the draft again this year," Ed grumbled.

Cole visibly relaxed and shook his head in shame. "GM's gotta go."

"Unless they turn things around in the second half of the season, a lot of heads are gonna roll."

"I might have to become a Nets fan."

Ed chuckled. "I'd join you but my boys are Knicks through and through. They'd disown me."

"A three-year old's going to disown you?"

"He's a very wise three."

"Well let's get him in there to run the team," Cole said. A Detroit Piston stole a lazy Knicks pass and coasted to the opposite end of the floor for a dunk and Cole scowled. "Or play. One or the other."

"The next time we go to a game I'll let you know. Watching basketball with Noah and Wyatt is a pretty good time." Ed cringed. Minutes ago, Cole told him he couldn't leave his wife alone for too long and here he was making plans that called for that very arrangement.

Cole either ignored or didn't notice the unintentional faux pas. He merely signaled for another round and smiled. "Count me in," he said, "And I won't mention the Nets."

"Yeah," Ed replied with a grin, "Probably for the best."

…

Ed came home to find his home full of people, which he ordinarily would have welcomed, but Cole's news coupled with the booze sent him into a melancholy, brooding state. He had planned to steal Olivia away from the kids or chores and ask her to sit with him on the couch for as long as they possibly could. He wanted to be near her, and he didn't want to talk to explain himself, at least not right away. Only she understood him when he was in this mood, but her TLC would have to wait.

"Daddy!" Noah shouted as soon as he heard him come through the door, "We have COOKIES!"

Ed rounded the corner from the foyer, and, sure enough, a spread of sugar cookies sat on the dining room table in various phases of decoration. Sarah, Brooke, and Olivia placed each different colored frosting in bowls and someone had brought over a specialized baker's kit because there were utensils laying on the table and in the kids' hands that Ed had never seen before.

"Whoa!" Ed exclaimed, "You got a whole production here. Are we starting a cookie company?"

"Nope!" Noah said, "But we're gonna eat 'em and give them to our friends. And our teachers. Brookey, does Sof have a teacher?"

"Yes she does," Brooke replied.

Noah did a quick calculation of the number of cookies and the number of people who would receive them as pre-holiday gifts. "We have enough," he said. "And we get to have all da broken ones!"

"Good deal."

Olivia walked over and put an arm around Ed's waist. "Did you have a good time with Cole?" She asked.

Her voice was so sincere it melted Ed's heart and made his anxieties temporarily disappear. The way she looked at him-directly into his eyes-when she asked the question showed immense care and concern. She loved him so much, and it showed the most in the little, mundane inquiries like this. Ed felt her fingers on his back-even that small touch was soothing. It would get him through the evening until they could be alone.

"Yeah," he replied. "Always good to see him."

"Did you eat?"

"Nah."

"We ordered Chinese. There's a ton left."

"Sounds good."

"Daddy!" Noah said, "You should do a cookie! Mommy, and Brookey, and Sare Bear all did a bunch!"

Ed surveyed the table. It was clear which cookies had been decorated by the adults, and the contrasting levels of neatness made him chuckle.

"I'll make you a plate," Olivia said, patting his back and jerking her chin toward the table, "Do a couple of cookies."

"Promise not to tease me about my lack of artistic expression?"

Not to mention the effect of four or five bourbons on his fine motor skills.

Olivia winked, grinned, and offered her assurances.

"Okay, Daddy," Noah said, "You can start with a star."

"A star, huh?"

"Dat's my stah, Dada!" Maggie said, pointing at a blue and yellow swirl design.

"Beautiful, sweetheart."

"Da star's good to start with 'cause there're no rules with it," Noah explained. "If you get a snowman, well, there's rules. Sare Bear broke da rules and did a pink hat, but dat's okay."

"Noey, someday you will appreciate my creativity."

Noah smiled at her with exaggerated sweetness and a touch of sass. Sarah blew him a kiss. Maggie blew a kiss too, aimed at no one in particular, and inadvertently smeared green frosting on her face. Brooke rushed over with a rag which had presumably been used for a similar clean up earlier in the evening.

Comforted by the chaos and the company, Ed went to work on his star.

….

Wyatt nervously waited for his parents to finish unloading and storing the Costco haul. Maggie and Noah were still outside playing catch, killing time until everyone left for the marina. Wyatt, on the other hand, offered to help unload and when his task was done he sat at the dining table staring into the kitchen where the leftover taco haul was now chilling in the refrigerator.

"Hey, sweetie," Olivia said as she passed by from the laundry room, "We're almost done. Are you ready for the boat?"

"Yeah," Wyatt mumbled.

Olivia narrowed her eyes. "Are you feeling okay?"

"Yeah, uh," Wyatt took a deep breath and let out a sigh, "I made a mistake. With your credit card."

Intrigued, Olivia sat down next to him and waited for further explanation.

"If you look in the fridge, you'll understand," Wyatt said.

Unbeknownst to him, Ed had been within earshot. He entered the room and asked, "What's so special about what's in the fridge?"

"Just look," Wyatt said, hanging his head.

Ed opened the door, removed the bag, and immediately started laughing. "Are we expecting guests?"

Olivia, too, was amused, but she also knew Wyatt was both embarrassed and worried he was in trouble. She put the pieces together and figured out what happened. "Those apps can be tricky," she said, patting Wyatt's arm.

"There's gotta be…one, two, three," Ed continued counting, "We have fifteen tacos left, Liv. No need to worry about dinner tonight. Maybe not lunch tomorrow, either. Well, three each…yeah, maybe only dinner." Ed put the bag back into the refrigerator and walked over to the table. He played with Wyatt's head and assured him he was not in trouble. "Mistakes happen, bud. It's alright."

"Did you at least overorder the shrimp tacos?" Olivia asked. "You know I love those."

Wyatt nodded. "Shrimp, carne asada, chicken, and regular…I overordered them all."

Olivia stood up and kissed his forehead. "Cheer up, sweetie. It's okay. And Dad wasn't kidding. We have dinner for tonight. We'll stop and get some chips and salsa on the way back from the boat."

Wyatt grinned. His mouth turned up slightly higher on the right side of his mouth and he cocked his head the way he did when he was about to make a solid point. "You would think they woulda put a lot more chips in the order with that many tacos," he said.

"Right?"

"They only gave us one bag. And we had to fight over the salsa."

"Well tonight," Olivia said, "There will be no salsa fights. Come on…let's head out."

…..

Olivia and Noah approached Sarah's building with two more plastic bags of homemade sugar cookies. They gave one to the doorman who promised to share with his coworkers and headed toward the elevator where Noah pressed the button for G's floor rather than Sarah's. "She's gonna be so s'prised," Noah said eagerly, "I hope she's home!"

"We'll see," Olivia replied. She texted G earlier and told her about the "surprise" visit both to increase their chances of catching her at home and decreasing the chances of G being bothered by an unannounced visit.

When Noah stepped off the elevator, he took the remaining cookie package from his mother's hand and led the way to G's door. After knocking, he said, "G! It's me, Noah!" And Olivia almost fainted at how adorable he sounded and looked.

It took G a minute to get to the door, and she swung it open with flair. "Hi Noah!" She said brightly, "Come on in!" She smiled appreciatively at Olivia and held the door open for them to come inside.

Making himself at home, Noah kicked off his shoes and half-skipped to the kitchen where he presented the cookies. "We made these for ya!" He said, "Some are pretty good but some are a little messy. Maggs and Wyatt and Sof decorated some," he added pointedly. "But they're all really yummy!"

"Thank you," G said, "I was going to buy some cookies but now I don't have to."

"Nope! And if ya want more you can come over 'cause we have a lot still."

"I'll do that."

"So, whatcha doin?" Noah climbed onto a barstool and rested his forearms on the island.

"Finishing up my end-of-year reports," G said. Shifting her gaze to Olivia, she continued, "Justifying my continued employment. And then I have to get packed. My family is all meeting in Florida at the beach for Christmas!"

"Oh, wow," Olivia said, "That'll be nice. Have you all done that before?"

"No, so it'll be a new adventure on top of the expected stress of all fifteen or so of us together in the same condo complex. At least we each have our own spaces."

"You can build a Santa sand castle!" Noah offered.

G grinned. "I think that's a really good idea. And, no, we haven't done this type of winter vacation before. We used to do it when we were younger during the summer which was fun, but, we're all adults now and my cousins have spouses and kids and it just gets messy sometimes."

"You gotta take presents for all those people?" Noah asked. His eyes grew wide as he tried to imagine how G was going to get a huge haul of gifts all the way to Florida.

"We did Secret Santa," G said, "So I only had to get presents for one person. That was easy at least."

"I love Secret SantaI" Noah exclaimed, "Mommy, we should do that. But, Santa can still come but it would be fun to do Secret Santa with our family."

"Let's do it," Olivia replied. "G, honey, we don't want to take too much of your time. We'll let you get back to work and packing. When are you leaving?"

"Monday."

"Well, maybe we can all have dinner or a drink or something over the weekend?"

"Sure."

"I'll check in with everyone else and give you a call."

"Great, thank you."

"Can kids come to this?" Noah asked.

Olivia grinned at her son and touched her knuckles to his cheek. "We'll make it so kids can come," she assured him, "We don't want to leave you out."

Noah furrowed his brow and said, "Sometimes kids are left out."

"I know, sweet boy. But this time, you're in."

….

#Tuckson