Slices of Life and Family

by bluefrostyy

PART 3 of The life of Sebastian Pines! (Read that first, I doubt you'll understand what's going on) The story follows Seb's life after Gravity Falls. Bill was defeated, but the Pines family still have thousands of adventures together. Old characters will come back, new characters will make an appearance, all to accompany Seb through his journey as a human (Cowritten with Mizuuma)

24. Chapter 24 Unnexpected connections

Hello! new chapter! you can check deviantart for my drawing of mabel traumatizing her twin and check Mizs amazing tumblr!

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Mabel woke up early, like she always did, and was really confused when she didn't wake up at home. The events from yesterday came back and she smiled. Right! They all were with Uncle Sebas! She picked up her phone, the first thing she did in the morning and, like a normal person, checked her messages "Blah, blah, work shifts, blah, blah, oh Rini's going to adopt a puppy? Lucky~! Oh! Mom wrote to me!" She texted her Mom about all the things that happened during the twins' birthday party and then the delicious food they had after and the incredibly cute man who was friends with her Uncle. Her mom took a bit to reply, but when she did, she sent lots of laughing faces. She asked about Dipper (who was still sleeping) and about Dad (who had fallen asleep with his face on his laptop last night, haha). Mabel snapped a new photo to send her mom.

Her mom sent her a picture of Waddles who was eating breakfast back in California and Mabel cooed, telling her Mom to kiss Waddles for her before saying bye. She wanted to find food herself. Walking around in an oversized t-shirt and sweater, completely disheveled, Mabel got out of her room and went into the hallway when she saw another door opening. Her brown eyes widened when she saw Xin coming out, and moments later, Uncle Ford came out too! Both of them had slept in their clothes from yesterday! What was Xin even doing in her Uncle's room?

She turned around and ran towards Dipper's room. She jumped over her sleeping twin. "Dipper! Dipper! Wake up! Wake up right now damnit!" The exhausted teen angrily threw her away as he rolled around, "Go bother Dillon or something, I'm tired…"

Mabel shook Dipper by his shoulders. "This is serious shit, DipDot! Wake up! I saw Xin coming out of Uncle Ford's room!" Dipper's eyes shot open. "Nope. Definitely don't want to think about that." He said before burying himself back in his sheets. Mabel shook him. "Dipper this is serious!"

"Nope. Nope. Nope." Dipper muttered to himself. "Not happening. Not thinking about it…"

"But what if this means uncle Ford is finally gonna get together with someone?" Mabel yelled in her brother's ear. "Ugh...I'm sure they were just...staying up late talking about science and stuff." Dipper tried as hard as he could to make an excuse. "But Xin's clothes were all wrinkled and Uncle Ford's too! And they were all disheveled and wearing yesterday's clothes!"

"Everyone's disheveled in the morning when they wake up. Have you seen yourself? And especially if they slept in their clothes without changing." Dipper deadpanned. Mabel narrowed her eyes. "But, with what Zoe and Zu-Zach told us yesterday-"

"We were misunderstanding a toddler's explanation, Mabel…" Dipper groaned. "Please, I don't want to think about this!" It was like thinking about their Mom and Dad doing it! Gross! Mabel rushed out of the room and Dipper thought she was finally dropping the subject. The door slammed open and she rushed back in. "They've got cuts and bruises!" She cried. Dipper covered his face with the pillow. Nope. Nope. Nope. Mabel climbed into the bed next to him and leaned her head on his shoulder. "Dipper, if Uncle Ford is with Xin…"

"Nope…"

"And he can shapeshift into whatever he wants…"

"NOPE!"

"That means Uncle Ford could theoretically get us a new cousin?"

"OH MY GOD! GET OUT OF MY ROOM! IT'S TOO EARLY IN THE MORNING FOR DISTURBING TRAUMA!" The boy tried pushing Mabel away, but she resisted. "Help me find out what happened!" she whined.

"Nope. This is a mystery the mystery twins will not be solving." Dipper laid down on his stomach and covered his head with a pillow. Mabel pouted before grinning. "Well maybe YOU won't help me but I bet Dillon would!" She raced off. Dipper decided to let her and Dillon handle this.

"Dillon! Dillon wake up!" Mabel slammed open his door and startled him into rolling off his bed. "Mabel? Wha-Whas wrong?" He asked groggily from the floor. The girl approached her cousin and smiled. "We'll be the Mystery Twins today! I have a mystery to solve!" Dillon raised an eyebrow with a small smile. "Oh yeah?" It felt nice to be taken into consideration. "What is it?"

"I totally saw Xin coming out of Uncle Ford's room all disheveled and with cuts and bruises! Help me find out what happened!" The boy blinked, stood up, marched towards his cousin and lifted her effortlessly from the floor by her arms. He calmly walked towards the door, placed her just outside and smiled. "Thanks, I didn't need that mental image so early in the morning, I think I need bleach for my mind now." He closed the door in Mabel's face and the girl scowled, thoroughly offended.

Fine. She would have to do this alone then. She walked off to find Xin and Ford. The two were in the kitchen where Xin was preparing breakfast. Ford had immediately gone for the coffee machine. "Hi~" Mabel smiled a bit too widely. "I slept well! Did YOU sleep well?!" Xin smiled. "Yeah, quite well, Shooting Star." He nodded. Mabel raised an eyebrow. "And you Uncle Ford?"

"Um, well, I guess, yes…" Ford nodded, confused at the strange tone Mabel asked the question with, and poured coffee into a mug. Mabel pouted. Ok. New plan. She made a show of gasping when she saw the bruises along Xin's wrists (oh my~was uncle Ford actually an aggressor in bed?! She blushed at the thought. She'd read that some asexuals still had sex if they were with someone they liked. So was this...) "Gasp!" She said. "How did you get those bruises Xin?" Xin didn't even falter "Bondage therapy." He said with a straight face.

"Ah hah! I knew-Wait what?" The girl scratched her brown hair. "Wha-What is that?" If you interpreted it literally, it could mean what she thought it meant, but she would let them defend themselves. Innocent until proven guilty, right? "Xin has panic attacks that cause the deaths of all people around him whenever he gets magically bound. And as a demon, he gets summoned a lot and some Summoners put binding seals around the circle just as a matter of course." Ford adjusted his glasses. "He wanted to try some exposure therapy to get over this by experiencing some physical binding. The problem is, he panics almost as much from physical binds and anyone he tries to get to help him with it gets...torn apart."

Ford grimaced. He'd asked Xin for more clarification and the demon/dragon had brought up some previous attempts using some of his own Bill clones. Apparently even holding himself down with more of himself would trigger a panic attack. "For various reasons, I don't seem to trigger the same Fright to Fight response, or at least, it's at a level he can handle without going over the edge, so Xin asked me to help him with getting him comfortable with the feeling and therefore, less afraid." The man concluded before calmly taking a sip of his coffee. Mabel looked between the two of them. "So you didn't have rough sex 50 hues style?" She felt relieved and disappointed at the same time.

Ford spat all his coffee to the side as Xin gripped a pan so hard it bent. "Naw." Xin finally said cheerfully. "I'm not into that." then a pensive look came across his face. "But that might be interesting to watch…" The curly haired man started coughing and hitting his chest, feeling his face heat up. "M-MABEL!" He cried. When the heck did she learn to speak like that?! (He didn't know what 50 Hues was, but the rest of that sentence-) Why did she have to say it so bluntly! "I-I have-I wouldn't-ARGH!" Ford was mortified. Mabel grinned as her uncle stuttered and pulled at his hair. "Ok, ok, I get it. Nothing happened…"

"Can you help me wake up everyone, Shooting Star?" Xin asked the teenager and Mabel saluted before going away. She had to tell Dipper and Dillon before he tried to bleach his eyes or eat a tide pod. She had seen a kid at school eat one and they got sent to the ER.

Ford groaned. What on earth gave Mabel that idea? He really didn't get it. He took another sip of his coffee. Xin spoke up casually "I suppose it felt as good as what I'd imagine sex to be?" Ford spat out another mouthful of coffee. Xin flicked a finger and cleaned off both sprays of caffeine. "Y-you waited for me to take a sip on PURPOSE!" Ford sputtered. Xin giggled. "Of course." The man grumbled and quickly took a sip of his coffee so he wouldn't be interrupted.

"I'm sure what I did last night was more of a chiropractic treatment than real bondage anyway." Ford rolled his eyes. What had started as Ford simply pinning Xin down while he tried to break free had ended up as Ford pulling and pressing on all sorts of pressure points along Xin's body to ease some of his back pain. The dragon certainly seemed to enjoy that. "That feels amazing! I've had that ache in my spine for AGES!"

Xin snorted. "Well, I think I prefer it." His fear had lessened significantly when he realized some of the rough handling had actually worked out the soreness in his physical form's back, among many other areas. Xin smiled at the thought. "Really though, thank you." He told Ford sincerely. The scientist let out a laugh. "It's fine. Helping you get over a fear so that you don't accidentally kill people is a good thing."

"Daddy...Daddy...Poke-poke…"

"Sir Bedazzle, lick his face."

Seb jumped with a cry when he felt a strange thing on his face. The twins were giggling and holding their acorn puppy as they laughed. "Hey…" He mumbled sleepily. "Can we get breakfast please?" Zach asked. "We want to eat breakfast with everyone and watching TV like yesterday." Zoe demanded. "Ok...Ok...Just let me wake up a bit more...and…" Seb fell asleep once again, resting his head on Wanda's back.

The twins huffed. "DAD!"

"Fine! Fine!" Seb grumbled before he moved and wiggled as much as he could to wake up Wanda too. It was a weekend, she had to suffer with him. The twins skipped downstairs with their parents, Sir Bedazzle running behind them, and instead of going to the kitchen with them, they got distracted when they saw a door that definitely hadn't been there before!

Seb rubbed his eye when he entered the kitchen but both Wanda and him froze when they saw Xin and Ford. Ford had scratches…Xin had bruises… Oh. OH! Ford looked up and raised his hand. "Good Morning Sebastian. Wanda."

Xin looked over his shoulder and said a "Mornin'!" as well before going back to his cooking. He'd made many pancakes, omelettes with all sorts of fillings (cheese and broccoli, potatoes and ground beef, mushrooms etc.) and toast. Xin had loudly told Ford that he knew how to use a toaster, which confused Ford. Why did Xin feel the need to clarify this fact? Seb approached his brother and looked up at him, putting his hands on his shoulders. "I...I just want you to be happy, ok? So...So you are free to do whatever you want as long as you're both okay with it." The older man raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Al...right?"

Wanda, a bit more casual, patted Ford's shoulder as she moved towards the fridge to take out the twins' milk. "Congrats, man." What in the name of Tesla was going on? Ford gave Xin a look but the other man shrugged and turned back to his food, not caring about what they were on about.

"Mommy! Daddy, there's a door to another world in the hallway!" The twins came running up to them with worried expressions. "Sir Bedazzle ran into it but we were too scared to follow him and now he's gone!" Zoe cried and hugged her mom's legs. "Dad, save him!" Zach pleaded with tears in his eyes. Despite the pain the twins were feeling, Seb couldn't help but laugh out loud. "Hahahahahahhaha!" The betrayed look on their faces were hilarious.

Xin sighed. "Don't worry, kids. I made that door. It's where all your relatives are sleeping. Sir Bedazzle is fine."

"So we can go in?"

"Yup!" Xin nodded and glared at Seb who continued laughing. Wanda rolled her eyes and didn't even comment when Zoe whined and kicked Seb's leg hard before running away shouting "MEAN!" Seb stopped laughing and glared at the kids. Oh, shit. That hurt! "Hey! Come back here, young lady! Zoe! ZOE!"

"Don't laugh at them. If you do, do it in private." Wanda threw him an ice bag from the freezer. Xin laughed. He loved watching these little humans interact. He hummed to himself cheerfully. Wanda looked at him and noticed some painful winces as he moved around with the bruises along his arms. Unknown to her, they were much darker the night before but his healing had made the bruises a lot lighter. A good thing too since if the adults had seen how dark the bruises were, they might have found it worrisome.

"Xin, you can lie down and rest. You must have had a rough night." Wanda went over to take over the breakfast duties. Xin waved her off, wincing a little when his bruises ached. "It's fine. I like cooking."

"But aren't you...sore?" Wanda asked. "A little I guess? But it actually feels pretty good." He rubbed his butt absently, trying to fix his skirt. He repaired his clothes but apparently he slept on his skirt kinda weird so it was sticking up at an odd angle. Wanda blushed a bit and nodded quickly before turning around to make the twins' breakfast. Ok. It was fine, people liked different things…

Meanwhile, Mabel was unable to wake up anyone. Her dad, with the red imprint of his keyboard on his face and many 'Ccccccvvvffff's in his Word page, didn't want to be moved, Dipper locked the door of his room and Dillon was way too strong to pull out of bed. Fortunately, Diego was unaware of everything, so she just picked him up, told him to knock on his parents bedroom (Mabel, as much as she wanted, couldn't simply burst in because Aunt Carla was there), and she got ¾ of the Pines-McCorkle! Yay!

Diego glared at his cousin for waking him up and clung to his Dad as they obeyed Mabel and went to the kitchen. Stan sputtered when his sharp eyes instantly caught sight of the scratches along Ford's skin and bruises on Xin. He immediately wanted to walk away because, ok, it's great to know his triplet finally got laid, but he wasn't sure why Ford liked it so rough…

"Ah...morning Sixer…" Stan coughed. Carla was blushing as she caught sight of the two men. She locked eyes with Wanda and the two shared an embarrassed shrug. "Good morning, Stanley. How was your night?" Ford asked as he ate a plate of eggs and toast. Xin kept pushing more food onto him ("Coffee is not a breakfast!").

Stan shrugged "I had a nice, quiet night…"

"Same. I slept quite peacefully." Ford munched on his toast. Seb started laughing like a dying whale as Wanda snorted loudly and had to cover her mouth to muffle her laughter. It was both because of the statement AND Seb's laughter. Stan grinned. "Yeah, I bet...it was a tiresome night yesterday, yeah?" He teased, but Ford didn't seem to notice. "Quite." Ford responded primly. "It had been a busy day and I am grateful Sebastian allowed us to stay the night." Sebastian responded with a wheeze and fell backwards as he cackled. "I-I need to tell Sherman…" He managed to wheeze and crossed his legs. "I'm going to pee myself!"

"He really should have used the restroom after he woke up." Ford shook his head, even as an adult, Seb was still so absent minded. Xin pouted. "He didn't even eat yet…" he placed the plate down anyway. Carla took a plate and thanked him. Stan couldn't keep a straight face when he sat at the table too. Mabel, who was watching, sort of amused and confused, wondered what was so funny. "Uncle Sebas, while you're there laughing, can you get Dad and Dip Dot? I can't get them to wake up."

Seb wiped a tear from his eye, a little more calmed, and nodded with a huge smirk. "Ok, ok...I-I'll go…" Seb left the room while giggling. Stan wanted to facepalm, really Seb? They should be more supportive. Stan grunted. "Congrats by the way. I hope you two used protection."

"Oh. We do have a safe word." Xin stated simply as he went to get more plates. He had to stand on his toes to reach the shelf and his skirt lifted to show off more bruises all down his legs. Carla and Wanda shared a look as Stan imploded with laughter inside. Ok. He got why Seb was laughing. God, this was stupidly hilarious. Oh God...Stan noticed the bruises. What was Ford even into?! And it was his first freaking time! He blurted out "Isn't that a bit much for your first time?" before he could stop himself. Stan immediately covered his mouth as Carla and Wanda glared at him. "Well...I guess? But I was just so happy I could finally find someone to do it with me. I've only done it with some of my clones before but they all got ripped to pieces." Xin stated with a shrug, referring to his previous attempts to try and get over his fear of being bound.

Stan was speechless while the two women's jaws dropped open. Mabel pouted. She still didn't understand why everyone was so shocked. Xin and uncle Ford were just doing some physical therapy right? Diego wasn't even paying attention as he happily ate his breakfast. Mabel wanted breakfast but she wanted to wait for everyone to be here first.

They all heard a loud obnoxious laughter coming from the magic hallway. That was Shermie. A few moments later the two younger Pines Brothers, followed by a groggy Dipper and two excited children carrying Sir Bedazzle, entered the kitchen with shit-eating grins. "Oh god, Seb…" Wanda muttered. He just couldn't stay silent, huh?

Xin waved "Morning Black Belt, Pinetree...little gremlins." The youngest twins giggled as they ran up to hug Xin's tail. The dragon yelped in pain. The kids immediately let go. "Did we hurt you?" Zoe asked in worry. She and Zach looked at their hands to see if there was fire. Xin shook his head. "It's not your fault. Fordsie pulled my tail a bit too hard last night…" The five adults plus Dipper choked. Zach nodded. "Oh! He pinned you down to the floor again?"

"And you liked it this time too?" Zoe asked, reaching for their plastic watering can to water the acorn-puppy. "Yeah. But he pinned me on the bed this time. Much more comfortable." Xin nodded. This time Seb didn't find it funny. "You did it in front of the twins?!" Ford sighed. "I didn't recognize Xin when I first met him yesterday and thought he was a burglar so I pinned him to the ground." He rolled his eyes. "You were there Seb." Stan looked at Seb with wide eyes. "The fuck?!"

"You pin burglars to the ground…" Shermie whispered. "Ford...what?!" He was working under the idea of what Seb told him and he didn't want to imagine what happened to the poor bastards that decide to rob his oldest brother. What kind of specific kink was that?!

Seb frowned. Ok. Right...Ford was pinning Xin to the ground in the morning...the twins, fortunately for both of them, didn't see anything, but if they weren't there would Ford have…? Did he realize he liked to hurt his partners right then and there? Discovered the spark that made him interested in...for lack of a better way to put it, the physical pursuits?

"Ford...I didn't know you were like that." Seb said. Then again...Ford, even way back when, liked to feel superior. He liked having power over others. He liked to be the one in charge. He...Seb didn't want to word it like this but, he liked to hurt others. Especially back when he was angry with the world and with Bill and with Seb. Actually...was that what this was? Some latent desire of Ford's to hurt Bill Cipher, any Bill Cipher. And...Xin just so happened to...enjoy it? It was a dark thought but it made sense to Seb.

He frowned and turned to Ford. He was afraid of Xin getting hurt...more hurt at least. "Don't go too far. Even if it's you, if you hurt Xin, I'm going to set you on fire." Ford raised an eyebrow. "Of course. I would never deliberately hurt him. We do have precautions. Besides, Xin can use magic to break out if it gets to be too much for him." That made Seb feel somewhat better. He hoped the two were careful. "Well...as long you're both happy." He said, still completely misunderstanding the situation.

"I…. guess?" Ford rubbed his nose in confusion but decided to get back to his breakfast. The twins were petting Xin's tail gently to try and make him feel better. "Still hurt?" Zach asked as he looked up at Xin and the dragon smiled at him gently. "I feel much better." Zoe looked at Ford. "Uncle Fordsie you have to be more careful!" She scolded and Ford chuckled a bit. "I will." He didn't want to continue talking about this anyway. Everyone seemed to be weirded out by the fact that he was helping Xin with his fear therapy.

After the...situation was kind of solved, albeit with a huge (and HILARIOUS, to Xin anyway) misunderstanding still in the younger Pines' minds, and after Dillon finally came down, they finally had breakfast properly. Xin had been making them eat even before everyone had gathered. As Xing happily passed a plate to each human, the other Pines brothers couldn't help but snicker from time to time. They knew they shouldn't tease Ford about his sex life, they had kids! They HAD done it before! Many times! Hell, Shermie had absolutely nothing to tell his brother, but the fact that Ford finally got laid was too funny to pass up.

Today was April 8th, Saturday, a day of rest and relaxation. Shermie and his twins had to leave at midday tomorrow because Dipper still had to finish his course before summer, but the Stans could stay a little bit longer, they had to take a break from work anyway.

"Daddy, after eating can we go with everyone to the park to play?" Zoe asked. "We want to show Diego our favorite swings!" Zach smiled. "Alright, but after you make your bed, change your clothes, brush your teeth and take all your presents to your room because Dad and I are not going to do it for you." Wanda gently told her children.

"Yeah, the same goes for you, Diego." Stan said absently as he ate his breakfast. "Except for the present thing, I guess." The toddlers groaned loudly and Zoe, out of spite, started hitting her head on the table. "Zoe, we talked about this." Seb sighed as he put a hand on her small forehead to stop her.

"Xin can take all the presents upstairs and put them in their places!" Zach argued. "Xin can't do everything for you." Wanda shook her head. The twins looked at Xin pleadingly and the demon shrugged. "You have to obey your parents." He said, even as his mouth twitched from trying to hide a smile.

"Urgh! Fine! We finish that and then we can go to the park?" Zoe extended her hand shake with her Dad as a small flame appeared around it. "Uh huh. But I want you to do it well, not half done." Seb's own hand caught on fire and he shook hands with his daughter. "Come on, Zach! We have to go change!"

"Should we worry about their deals actually working?" Stan asked as his niblings and son ran away. Seb looked sheepish. "I haven't really tried talking to them about that...But I have a feeling their deals would actually work…" Wanda grumbled. Troublesome magic!

"Oh! It's been decades since we've gone to the park!" Mabel squealed and grabbed her brother's arm, making him drop his fork. "This'll be so much fun!" Dipper sighed, grateful he finished his homework the night before. "Mabel, it hasn't been decades! We're not even two decades old!" Dipper frowned. "Do we need to make our beds too? Isn't there something about bed bugs or something?"

Xin commented absently. "The thing with making the bed is that humans think it looks and feels nice." he paused "And also because it's a trained habit to teach people to be neater and cleaner. But frankly, if you vacuumed, dusted and cleaned your sheets regularly then it shouldn't matter if you don't make the bed."

The adults nodded. "So it's just practice for getting people used to a routine of cleanliness?" Ford asked. Xin nodded. "Exactly. In fact some people believe the upside of a neat bed is worth the work even without the cleanliness factor. And if you're washing and airing out the sheets regularly then it's the same either way…it just makes things look nicer and if you think about it, if you went to a hotel room and the sheets weren't neat, you would feel grossed out right?" Xin explained.

The Pines finished eating so they could clean up and get ready. They promised the kids they would all go to the park after all, and all of them meant ALL of them. "I don't have appropriate clothes for a park day." Mabel pouted when she realized the clothes she brought from home where a little formal. Dipper shrugged and simply wore his jeans and t-shirt from yesterday. Ugh. Boys.

Xin grinned. "Never fear! I'm here!" He waved his hands and clothes popped into existence. Mabel picked up a shirt and questioned "Why is everything flannel?" Xin blinked. "I was going for plaid. I guess I'm still getting them mixed up…"

Mabel nodded and Xin grinned. "Well what do you want to wear?" Mabel found a pink flannel she liked and grinned. "Can I have black shorts, maybe...a white t-shirt? With lots of smiley faces!" The girl smiled. "Boom! Done!" Xin grinned. Mabel squealed. He even added a small shooting star on the upper part! It was like having a fairy god-mother!

Stanley frowned. "Don't you have problems granting people stuff without anything in return?"

"Oh I'm definitely getting something in return~" Xin purred as he fluffed Ford's hair. Everyone coughed loudly. Mabel blinked. "Well, thanks! I'm gonna go change!" She ran away with her garments. Xin magicked his own clothes into an oversized t-shirt and jeans. He also had to retract his tail and antlers. Everyone felt more weirded out seeing Xin in casual clothes than they did when he was in the butler or maid outfit.

Seb put on some old clothes (because he knew he would end up with grass on him), kind of fixed his hair, brushed his teeth and went to check on the twins. It'd been around half and hour and the twins hadn't come back downstairs. Knowing them, they got distracted by something.

Zach was only wearing a t-shirt and underwear, Zoe was only in her pajama shorts and they were playing with their toys and Sir Bedazzle who, now that he thought about it, hadn't been watered yet.

"Guys…" the man sighed. "Daddy!" They grinned. "We were doing everything but we ended up playing…" Zoe explained. Seb sighed. "Well you won't have to make your beds today…" the twins cheered "...but we're all gonna wash the sheets when we get back from the park." They groaned. Seb smirked. "Either we wash the sheets once every 2 weeks or you make your beds everyday. You pick."

"...wash." They both said. Seb laughed. "Well go finish changing and brushing your teeth. I'm going to water Sir Bedazzle." The twins nodded and went to the bathroom first. Seb grabbed the acorn who barked happily at his owner. Water! "You are a weird little shit but I still like you." Seb declared before putting the acorn under his arm to take him downstairs. Instead of having plates with water and food, the kitchen had a small laundry bin where Sir Bedazzle knew he had to climb into to be watered.

Seb grabbed the watering can and laughed at the excited and expecting look the acorn puppy gave him. "Here you go, Sir Bedazzle." Seb watered the pet and it closed it's large eyes to happily bathe in the cool water. "Who's the best acorn?! You?! You are!" Seb cooed at their pet who was now splashing in the bin. The kids always wanted a pet but neither him or Wanda wanted an animal. This was WAY better.

.

The twins came downstairs ready to leave, and one by one, their family crowded into the living room. The last two were Xin and Ford. Shermie, Stan and Seb snickered behind their hands. Wanda looked at Carla, who was packing a bottle of water to take. "They're such children." the two sighed over the Pines men. "Tell me about it, girl."

They noticed that with Xin wearing a short sleeved shirt now, the bruises along his arms were in clear view. Now, they knew it was from a consensual romp in the sheets but the neighbors would probably talk. Wanda walked over "Xin? Could you wear long sleeves instead?" Xin shrugged and changed his shirt, to Wanda's relief. "Sure?"

"Thank you, I mean, it's not like I'm controlling you, but you know how there are assholes everywhere and-"

"Hey. It's ok." Xin smiled as he put his hands on her shoulders and nodded. "It's like how my friends don't like seeing my bricks misaligned."

"CAN WE GO NOW?!" Zoe moaned. "We aren't getting any younger here!" The impatient girl tapped her foot. "We've been waiting, like 5 hours!" Diego complained. It'd been 10 minutes, but the family agreed and the 15 people left the house chanting "Park! Park! Park! Park!"

They were quite a large group and it was early in the morning but they were having too much fun to worry about that. Some of the neighbors shook their heads when they saw the group walking down the sidewalk, but they had to admit it was adorable seeing such a close knit family.

The Pines family marched on, not realizing their smiles and joyful mood was infectious. Xin was nibbling carefully on the feelings around him. Didn't want to overdose and get sick. That would certainly put a damper on things. He wasn't wearing a headband, aiming to get more practice on filtering by himself before he absorbed them. He didn't want to rely on it all the time. Though happiness was a nice treat.

"I've been staring at the edge of the water long as I can remember! Never really knowing why~" Zoe sang loudly and soon enough, Mabel was joining her little cousin.

"I WISH!" Mabel dramatically sang. "I could be the perfect DAUGHTER!"

"Mabel, honey, don't shout, people might still be sleeping." Shermie scolded softly but Seb screamed. "BUT I COME BACK TO THE WATER!" Xin laughed and joined in. "No matter how hard I try~" The dragon linked arms with Seb who looped his arm with Mabel as she picked up Zoe. The four of them sang together "Every turn I take, every trail I track, every path I make, every road leads back~"

They threw their heads back ""To the place I know where I cannot go~where I LONG TO BEEEE!""

Shermie, Stan and Ford groaned. Great. Now there were FOUR of them! The rest of the family rolled their eyes. "Why, please." Dipper whined in embarrassment when he noticed a neighbor staring at them from their window. "Hey. I didn't see you complaining when you did that amazing solo fighting zombies, Pinetree." Seb reminded him. Xin giggled. "If we were singing BABBA he would join in…"

Dipper gasped and slapped a hand over Xin's mouth. "Shhh!" He hissed. "No one must know!" Xin gave a sly smile full of sharp teeth. "What'll it cost to keep me quiet I wonder~?" Dipper stared at Xin in panic and tried to think of something he could bribe him with. His mind raced and landed on the first thing he could think of, "Uncle Ford is ticklish!"

"Oh?" Xin blinked. Dipper was blushing but he nodded. "It's around his ribs...if...if that information might interest you…" Dipper wasn't thinking about what Xin might do to his uncle with this information, definitely wasn't! "Oh~I'm sure I can find some use for this~" Xin purred. Dipper suddenly wanted to apologize to uncle Ford.

They made it to the park and the children (plus Mabel) immediately ran off to play on the jungle gym. Xin raced after them too. "I call dibs on the swings!" he laughed. He pouted when he saw he was too tall for the kid swings. He glanced around to make sure there were no other people watching and 'poof'ed into Miz.

"Push me!" She demanded as she sat on the swing and kicked her legs. Ford sighed at the demon's childishness. "Aren't you several billion years old?" He asked as he walked over to give her a push. Miz cheered as she swung into the air. "I'm almost 700 billion years old!" She laughed. "My point still stands." Ford rolled his eyes. Seb whined. "I wanna swing too~"

"Well you're too big. Hah!" Miz stuck her tongue out at him. Seb pouted and looked at his younger brother. "Hey, Shermie~Want to make a deal~?" He could make swings if he used his powers through deals. "No, I don't like magic." Shermie winced. Seb turned his pleading look to Stan who also shook his head. "Nope~"

Seb pouted as Miz's cute laughter rang out. Zoe and Zach ran over to the swings. "I wanna swing too!" Zach climbed onto another child swing and kicked his legs.

Ford began pushing all the children. There were plenty of swings after all. Even Diego got to sit on one. Ford huffed as he ran back and forth between the four swings and gave each one a push. "Help please? I can't push all of them!" he called out to his brothers.

"I'll help ya with that if you make a deal with me!" Seb grinned at his oldest brother. Ford groaned. "No."

"Oh come on!" Seb whined as he leaned on his wife, complaining "Wands! None of my brothers will make a deal with me~!" He kissed her cheek and licked it. "Make a deal with me! You're my wife!" The woman rolled her eyes as she wiped her cheek. "I was going to, but you licked me so now I don't want anything." She teased. Seb groaned and threw himself onto the grass. "Why won't anyone make a deal with me~?!"

"Because you're not offering them anything." Miz teased. "I am not omnipotent or all powerful though! I need to get them to agree and they have to tell me what they want!" Seb whined. Miz was going to tease him some more but she "Eep!"ed when Ford pushed her higher. "N-no more! This is good!" She clung to the plastic tubing around the swing's chains and squeezed her eyes shut. Ford raised an eyebrow. "You don't want to go higher?"

"Nope! This is good!" Miz said as she kept her eyes closed. Zach was kicking his legs. "Well I want to go more high!" He demanded. Ford pushed him higher but was watching Miz cling to her swing until it lost some height and she opened her eyes again. "Are you...afraid of heights?!" He asked incredulously. Miz pouted. "Just a little bit."

"But...you're a flying creature!" Ford cried.

"Which means I know EXACTLY what happens when a physical body falls from a great height while trapped in gravity's clutches." She mumbled with a faint blush. Stan came over to give her a reassuring smile. "No problem. I was afraid of heights too."

"Have YOU ever gotten caught in the orbit of a collapsing star and got pulled in?" Miz grumbled. Stan rolled his eyes. "No, but I fell off a tree once and broke my arm. That sucked." Miz laughed. "Not as much as a black hole!" The two laughed and Miz relaxed a little (See?! Stan got her joke!) Ford pushed the other kids until they got bored and asked to be let off. Except Zoe who waited for the apex of her swing and jumped off, making the adults scream out in panic.

A yellow glow surrounded her and Seb held his hand out with his eye wide. "ZOE! Don't DO that!" He screamed as his heart pounded. He lowered her to the ground and ran over to hug her. "Shit I was so scared!" The man cried as he picked up the toddler. Wanda ran over to them. "Is she alright?! Did you hurt yourself? Do you need something?" The blonde child groaned and pushed their hands away. "I'm fine! Daddy, you ruined my jump." She grumbled. "You could have gotten hurt!" Seb scolded.

"No I wouldn't! I'm stwong!" Zoe insisted. "No, no! I don't want you jumping like that! It was too high, you could have landed wrong and broke something!" Seb was tense as he scolded his daughter. "Please don't do that again."

"Ok, ok...Can I go now?" She asked impatiently and Seb sighed before nodding.

"Seb, I know you get worried, but you're exaggerating the part of an overprotective dad." Shermie patted his shoulder. "You don't know how many times Mabel came back with scraped knees and elbows… and splinters." He smiled. "And you were reckless yourself. But you're still alive." he joked.

Seb sighed. "I know. But...ugh... I get so worried…they're so small and anything can happen to them…" He remembered when he had to take care of his brother's twins. He had heart attacks daily because of Dipper and Mabel's antics. Zach had brought a ball with him and now he was playing with Zoe, Diego and Dipper. "But Dipper is older!" Diego complained as he teamed up with Zach.

"He counts as half. He doesn't know how to play!" Zoe smiled. She kicked the ball and the little boys ran after it. Both Zoe and Zach practiced, but she was much better. Dipper pouted. He knew how to play soccer! He ran after his cousins. He had the ball in front of him and kicked, but missed. "Seriously?" He stared at the ball. The adults laughed loudly at the older boy as Zoe came behind him and kicked, making the ball fly away. Miz came off the swings, swaying a little, and ran off to play with the kids too. She kicked the ball and it sailed through the air to hit Dipper in the stomach. "Oops!" She laughed.

Mabel winced and tried to get over to her brother to check on him, but she was hanging upside down with the blood pooling in her head, which made her slip. She fell to the sand with a thud. Shermie sighed. He was too old to deal with these kids (never mind the fact that he was only in his mid 30s). "Are you ok, son?" Dipper took a mouthful of air. "Y-Yeah… at least it wasn't lower." He pouted at his aching stomach and walked towards his Dad to curl up with him on the grass. Shermie patted his head, laughing. "Dipper. You need to get in shape. At least for your health, you know?"

"Pfth!" Dipper rolled his eyes. Miz ran over and flopped on top of him. "Sorry! I didn't mean to hit you!" She wailed. "Did I break your delicate organs?" Dipper smiled wryly at her. "I'm fine, I think, Miz…I just want to rest." He looked up at the green-eyed man. "And I AM in shape! I want to see YOU take a cannonball from a demon to the stomach and walk it off." Shermie raised an eyebrow at Miz. "No offense but Miz looks like I could break her with one hand…"

Miz shrugged. "I'm not sure that…" She trailed off with a contemplative look. "Hey Fordsie! Can we try it while I'm in THIS form later?" Ford turned around at his name. "If...you want?" Stan hid his head on his wife's chest as he cackled and Seb almost broke his neck from turning around so fast. Shermie looked horrified. "No! Nope! I don't care how old Miz really is!" He covered his eyes. "Stanford you are sick!"

"But-But why?" Ford frowned, utterly confused about why the idea of helping Miz with her exposure therapy was so wrong. "She asked me!" Wanda and Carla had odd looks on their faces (all the adults still believing that the two had just had sex the night before). Carla turned to Miz with a worried look. "It's not that we don't...accept this, but you're just...so small. It might be too much for you." Miz pouted. "I...guess you're right…" It WOULD be much harder for her to break free when she was half his height. She shrugged and ran off to play on the jungle gym.

Seb groaned in relief and fell backwards. Stan collapsed next to him with a perturbed look and Shermie tried to look anywhere but at Ford. He ended up with his face on Dipper's back, blushing. "I'm the only normal one in this family…" Shermie realized in despair.

Seb groaned. "Sixer...even if she asks you...there are some things you just can't do. As an adult you need to be the responsible one and refuse." Wanda giggle-whispered to Seb. "Speaking of being a responsible adult, say something responsible~" she teased. "...Taxes…" Seb whispered back.

"But...she IS an adult…?" The man with glasses was so confused. Seb groaned with Shermie as they both buried their faces. "But she's...tiny. And you're...twice her size…" Sebastian blushed. Why was Ford so stupid despite being a genius?

Ford nodded. "True. It does put me at a much greater advantage. She won't have the leverage needed to fight back properly. Though I suppose it means our sessions would be more effective with a higher simulation of threat…" He continued to muse aloud to himself as everyone stared at him in horror. "What?!" Seb and Shermie said at the same time. Stan groaned loudly and pulled Carla towards him. "Please make him stop…" The man sobbed.

Ford blinked innocently. "Well we agreed that I would hold him down while he tries to break free from my hold. I've been trying a couple different suppression techniques. Stanley, remember that Fenishian choke hold we learned in Dimension 6-Alpha dash? Xin really seemed to enjoy that one…"

Shermie covered his son's ears. Dipper was in pain so he wasn't listening anyway.

"Ford, just shut up and let me be in peace for one second… what you do with-with Xin is something private!" Stan cried as he used Carla as a shield while she was laying down on his broad chest. "Oh. I wasn't aware this was something to be kept secret…" Ford shrugged. "Yes!" The five adults cried. The six-fingered man frowned. Seriously, they were so weird. He thought it was an interesting topic. Physical therapy for a normally incorporeal demon.

Exposure therapy for Bill's anxiety by placing him in a situation similar to their trauma, but in a safe environment with no intent to cause harm. He wanted to study Xin's physical reactions more. How extensive was the nervous system of his constructed physical bodies? Did his pain receptors redirect to pleasure centers in his brain? There was so much he could learn from studying him. The very thought shot a thrill through him, energizing him in a way he hadn't felt in a while. The joys of discovery!

The park was slowly getting more kids and Zoe pouted when their swings were occupied. Mabel had a great idea and crouched in front of her cousin. "How about a water balloon fight? We can go to your house and bring them!"

"Oh!" The younger girl gasped. "Yeah that'd be so cool! Let's go!" The only Pines girls ran away giggling. Seb stared at them in worry but Wanda took his arm. "They'll be fine. The house is nearby and Mabel will be with Zoe." Seb nodded. "Right. You're right. I'm sorry…" He sighed. "I need to learn to relax don't I?" Stan grabbed his brother's arm and pulled him up. "Hey, kids!" The little boys turned around. "We're joining in!" Their sons cheered at that.

"Oh. Looks like the park is full." An annoyed voice rang out. The Pines turned to see Carol and Amanda (who looked a little unhappy and scared as she sent her mother a distressed look). "Hey…" Seb grimaced at the sight of the blonde woman. Stan glared at her as their sons looked at the adults, confused. "H-Hi Amanda." Zach waved at her shyly. She smiled back but her mother shoved her behind her. "Don't talk to her." Carol snapped. "Of course you have to invade the playground all for yourselves."

"Hi, Carol...did you just come to ruin our day with your horrible face or did you come to apologize to my son?" Seb grinned, doing everything in his power to not snap. Carol sniffed and turned away, grabbing Amanda's arm to drag her away. The little girl turned back to give them a sad wave. Zach sniffled. It's not fair that Amanda couldn't play just because her mom was a meanie. He frowned when he heard Amanda whine, "Mommy that hurts!" as Carol yanked on her arm to make her walk faster.

Seb ruffled his baby's hair. "You still up to play, champ?" Zach sighed when he lost sight of his neighbors. "Yeah…" He didn't know what to do.

Miz frowned in the direction of the woman and flicked her fingers. A wide, vicious smile spread across her face (using magic on people without permission was bad, but people who've hurt the ones she cared about were fair game) and Dipper shuddered when he saw it. He kept forgetting she was actually Bill Cipher. He was suddenly worried about that neighbor. Even if she was a bitc-...a jerk to his cousin. "What did you do to her?" Dipper asked her. The girl giggled. "If she's gonna BE a dick, she's gonna GET a dick…"

"...Bill. No. You can't DO that! Bill, I am NOT joking!" The boy panicked. Miz scoffed. "I don't see the problem here. She's just gonna slowly turn into a man over the next month or so."

"But-But!" The boy started stuttering. "You really can't do that! She's an asshole but-"

"Please~any trip to the doctor will reveal a dormant genetic quirk that has suddenly become active and flooded her body with the relevant hormonal levels needed to cause the physical changes...she can change herself back to normal via surgery and opposing hormone treatments." Miz climbed the jungle gym to dangle upside down. "You know, like all other people have to do in order to be who they want to be."

Dipper shook his head. He was a witness of a terrible spell. He knew people did that but really?! It was a horrible punishment, but Dipper had to admit it was pretty mild compared to other things the Bill from 5 years ago did. What he did to Pacifica's dad? Ew.

"I won't be able to keep this a secret, the guilt will kill me, Miz." The teen looked at the laughing girl. "Can I tell them?" He asked nervously. Miz shrugged as she climbed around like a sloth. "Sure. I don't care." She looked at Dipper. "I just think she should know how it feels. It's not wrong right? Making her have a taste of what she insults other people for?" She tilted her head in innocent confusion.

"It's not wrong to make her empatize, I wished she understood Zach too, but...but changing her sex will-will be too traumatic! They have a daughter." Dipper protested. "I'm not changing her sex, I'm making it so she has a chromosomal disorder and is actually genetically male now." Miz still didn't understand what the problem was. "It didn't affect her daughter because she was born before the gene went active. And all I'm doing is flooding her with male hormones, any changes she'll undergo are the same as anyone else on hormone treatment."

Dipper groaned. He wasn't gonna be able to convince her. He ran a hand through his hair and walked towards his youngest uncle. "Uncle Seb, Bill turned that discriminatory witch into a man." Dipper said softly. "WHAT?!" Seb turned to look at Dipper and the ball hit him square in the head. "I get more points for hitting him, right?" Stan laughed.

Seb rubbed his aching head and looked at his nephew. "What do you mean by that?!"

"Um, Miz changed her DNA. Or something." Seb blinked before exploding with laughter. You just couldn't mess with Bill Cipher! Dipper groaned. "It's not funny, Uncle Seb! Make Miz change her back!"

"I ain't doing shit! That bitch made my baby cry, she deserves to suffer." He patted the boy's curls. "When you have your own kids with Pacifica, you will understand." Seb turned to Miz and gave her a thumbs up. She giggled and waved back, swinging from the jungle gym by her legs. Dipper sighed to make his blush disappear. He was not going to convince this man. He tried at least…he went to sit down under the tree shadow with his aunts and Dillon, pulling out his phone. It was that woman's problem she messed with the Pines family to begin with.

"TAKE THAT!" A high pitched voice shouted. Dipper cried when a water balloon exploded on his face. He sputtered as he heard his sister and Zoe laughing. He laughed as well and got up to grab for a water balloon too. "You guys cheated!" He still worried about the spell Miz had cast though. Maybe he should talk to uncle Ford instead. He robbed a few water balloons just to get Zoe and Mabel back for hitting him and made his way over to Ford.

Ford was writing something when he saw Dipper approaching him. "Um, you should put that book away. Mabel and Zoe got water balloons." The eldest triplet looked up and saw Shermie, who was napping on the floor, getting attacked. "Thanks for the warning." Ford chuckled. "Um...you saw that woman who was a bitch to Uncle Seb and Zach?" Dipper asked awkwardly. Ford nodded "Quite the unpleasant woman."

"Ah...Miz cursed her or something?"

"What!" Ford frowned. "That sounds problematic. What did she do? What sort of curse? A death curse? Did she turn the woman's blood into mercury?"

"What? No. She...she turned that woman into a man…"

"Oh. Is that all it is?" Ford shrugged. "Well, serves her right."

Dipper groaned. Not Ford too! "Come on, Uncle Ford!"

"Well, it's true, Dipper. She shouldn't go around shouting stuff at people, even less at children and without any real argument. Maybe now she will learn that the body has nothing to do with someone's mind or gender." Ford said in a know-it-all way.

"But changing bodies is horrible! I was trapped in Mabel's body for an entire day once and it was awful!" Dipper cried.

"You...never told me about that?" Ford raised an eyebrow. Dipper flushed. "It was really awkward. Mabel and I don't really talk about it."

"Well, even if you did, there is a difference. You were swapped into a body that wasn't your own, while she will have a change within hers, it will still be her body…" Ford wondered what exactly Miz did to that woman's body, it sounded pretty interesting. He should ask her tonight. Dipper groaned. "At least please try to change her mind? You...you two are close...right?" Dipper asked. Ford stared at Dipper. "I met William 18 years ago and met them again only yesterday, so I don't know what you mean by close. But regardless, I don't see the problem here. That woman isn't going to die or melt into a screaming pile of flesh so I think it's fine to let her be punished for at least a little while."

Ford looked over at where Miz was going down the slide while squealing "I suppose I could ask Miz to break the curse after that." Dipper nodded, relieved he would AT LEAST try to talk to Miz. "Thanks, Uncle Ford!" Ford ruffled his wet hair and Dipper joined his cousins to play with the water balloons. Ford took that time to walk over to Miz as she was back on the swings. "Is that woman truly a man now?" He asked casually, sitting on a free swing.

Miz hummed as she swung herself. "It's going to be subtle changes over the next month or so. She's not gonna grow a real dick or anything but there will be physical differences." She swung herself with a frown. "Did I do bad?" she asked quietly. Ford smiled. "I don't think so. I agree with you that she deserved some sort of punishment."

Miz grinned and stopped swinging. "You have a twisted mind too, Fordsie~" She stood up from the swing and poked his nose. "You agree with me and Sebas that, that woman deserves to suffer…" She purred, her face getting closer to his with a teasing grin. "I think that's why I like you guys so much." Before Ford could respond, she skipped merrily over to the bucket so she could join the water balloon fight.

Ford felt cold. He was twisted? Was that really true? Ford had prided himself in his moral code. He wasn't a cruel man, at least he didn't consider himself to be one.

"Join me, Sixer. Take your place by my side. You fit right in with my freaks!" Ford shivered at the memory of HIS voice. The Bill Cipher who had acted as his muse for a few years. Who had tricked him, betrayed him…

...who had asked Ford to join him. Offered him power beyond imagining if he would only agree to join him. Ford had refused of course.

He had never really thought about why Bill had insisted on it. What had made Bill want him to join his gang. Ford shivered. He thought of how Dipper had seemed so worried and distressed about Miz's karmic retribution towards that woman. Ford sighed. Was there really something twisted about him? Worried, he walked closer to his family. He didn't even want to be too close because he thought they would be bothering him and not let him work… Stan had bought sodas from a nearby store and was giving one to everyone not involved with the water fight.

"Want one, Sixer?" Stan asked with a grin. Ford nodded and his eyes widened a bit when Stan threw the can at him. His reflexes hadn't dulled so he caught it before it smacked into his face. The Stans settled down on the grass and watched their youngest triplet getting attacked by his twins. Miz refilled the bucket with her powers and all the cousins laughed when she poured it over Seb. "AH! COLD!"

Ford held the can between his six-fingered hands. "Tell me, Stan...do you think I am… a bad person?" Stan was immediately frowning. "Woah, um, if this is about you and Miz, we were just giving you a hard time. Y'know since she looks so young but actually isn't and…"

"That's not what I mean." Ford looked at his soda can. Pitt Cola? He wasn't aware they sold that outside of Gravity Falls. "Do I...have a skewed moral sense?"

"Pfft! You are the most nerdy goody two-shoes I have ever met, Ford!" Stan laughed, relieved that this wasn't something serious. "You wanted to stay in Gravity Falls and fight Bill."

"But that was my fault, I couldn't let the town-"

"Besides, morality is relative." The younger man sipped his soda. "You really should have learned that from me while we were in space..." He joked, but his brother didn't laugh or smile. "What…even made you think that?" Stan asked. Ford looked over to where Miz was running around, shrieking with laughter as Seb and his gremlins yelled and threw balloons at her. "Miz said she liked how twisted my mind was."

"Ah...no offense Sixer, but you were willing to...ah...have a 'session' with her when she looks like a child...that's pretty twisted." Stan knew she wasn't a real kid but...still. He wouldn't do it, and he liked having 'sessions'. Man, he should start calling it that in front of Diego. Pretty convenient way to talk to Carla about their sex life without the kids finding out.

Ford looked down. "I didn't know…" He said quietly. "Stanley. I wasn't a good brother, in either of my two chances. I know it wasn't entirely my fault...but I still had the chance to be different. And I wasn't. You were a much better brother to Sebastian and Sherman. We both grew up in the same house." Ford winced as he remembered how much he just… didn't even care about his other brothers, always off in his own head and only thinking about himself. "I don't want to be a bad person, Stanley." Ford looked up at his brother, upset. Stan rubbed his arm. "Kids fight each other all the time. It doesn't...make you...bad."

"Stanley, Don't make excuses for me. Stanley please, tell me." Ford stared into his triplet's eyes. "Am I a b-bad person?" Stan couldn't help the scowl. "I'm not saying you're bad. But you DID try to kill Seb...multiple times. Not as a child, as a full grown adult. A paranoid one." Ford's face fell. "I know." He placed his hands behind his back. "I still feel awful for that."

"Hey, wasn't totally your fault. That damn triangle fucked with your head."

"That's not the point, Stanley!" Ford's voice wavered. "Bill might have put me against Seb, but all he did was make me angry. He didn't actually change my thoughts. I...I had justifications for what I did to Seb. For how I treated him. I…" Ford hunched over himself. "I told myself, convinced myself that Seb deserved to suffer, as punishment for the crimes from his past life. And just now, I said that toxic woman who made Zach cry deserved to be cursed…"

"Wait curse? What curse? When did THAT happen?" Stan's eyes went wide. "Miz cursed her to slowly turn into a man, Miz asked me if doing so was bad. She...asked me to tell her if it was a good or bad thing to do." Ford stared at Stan, eyes growing wide as he realized why that was. "...she asked me because she doesn't know. I don't think she can tell right from wrong. And I told her it was fine. But was it fine? Was it good? I thought such a curse would be a fine punishment for that woman's cruel, ignorant words, but Dipper was very upset by it."

Stan thought about what Ford told him. Eventually, he responded. "I...I think curses are not good...that woman was a jerk to Zach but...maybe that woman deserved something less...extreme?" Stan was at a loss here. He didn't know. Magic was something powerful and he had seen how bad it could be. "And just 'cause you think it's fine while me and Dipper don't, doesn't make you a bad person. You just… have different ways of seeing the world. Maybe it means you're a little twisted but it doesn't make you evil or bad." Stan clapped his brother's shoulder. Ford didn't look any happier though.

Stan sighed. "If you really feel bad about this, you can ask Miz to...lessen the curse? And maybe come talk to me in the future if you're not sure what 'ta do. I'm not exactly the straightest arrow in the stack but I like to think I'm a good guy and 'someone you can trust!'" He quoted his slogan and Ford gave him a little smile.

"Alright...thank you, Stanley." Ford still felt a little unsure but he trusted Stanley to know what to do. He sighed and got up. "I'm going to ask Miz to lessen her curse into something less...invasive." He walked over to see the girl soaking wet, brushing her long dark hair from her eyes. "Miz?"

"Yeah, Fordsie?" She tilted her head innocently. He sighed. "Genetic alteration might cause major problems down the line. Is there any other way you could curse her?" Miz paused and her eyes seemed to be staring off into the distance. Finally she blinked and flicked her fingers. "Fine. I'm just gonna make her slowly go bald instead." She pouted. "Less fun I think." Ford smiled and reached out a large hand to ruffle her hair. "Thank you." She squealed and nuzzled his palm. "Sure, whatever~" she laughed.

"I'm hungry~" Zach announced. Diego whined as he held his stomach. "Hungwy…" the twins and Diego all held their stomachs and droned "Hungwy~" immediately after that, Mabel joined them. "It's amazing how much they're like you." Carla commented, looking at the Pines brothers. Stan, who had his shirt wet because Seb suddenly came up behind him and shouted "Blergh! It's me!", and threw a water balloon at him, grabbed her by the waist. "We Pines are too awesome for you to understand, that's all. It's not your fault." He shrugged.

"Can we go eat somewhere~?" Zoe pleaded, spitting her wet hair from her mouth. Then her eyes widened, "WcDonalds!" She shouted. The toddlers started chanting around their parents and everyone laughed. Dipper grabbed Mabel before she joined them. "That's their turn now, sis. It's their turn to be the adorable ones." Dipper said solemnly. Mabel gave him a dead stare. "I have lost my adorability card. Who even AM I anymore!?" She flung herself onto Dipper dramatically. "I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO I AAAAAM!"

"Alright! Alright!" Seb was the first to give up. He just couldn't resist it when they looked up at him with their large eyes and wobbling lips. Besides, a family lunch sounded fun! "But we need to get changed first." He pointed out. Miz flicked her fingers and everyone's clothes were dried. "I want WcDonalds, Sebastian Pines! I don't have time for you all to change!" She ran up to pull at his hand. "I haven't had a real human fast food experience in eons!"

"What? No fast food places in space?" Seb laughed. Stan and Ford shuddered. "Oh...there are plenty...but…"

"You'd be caught dead if you tried to go in one of those. Like, literally, the fast food places carve you up and serve you." Miz pouted. "Awful service really."

"Space sounds like a messed up place." Wanda commented dryly. "I vote we stay here on Earth with our normal fast food that probably doesn't contain human flesh." Miz hummed. "I always wondered what humans taste like…"

"Me too!" Zoe said as everyone took a step back. Seb couldn't say he hadn't thought about it too, but he kept quiet about that. "Zach and I saw a movie we shouldn't have seen and a mean man bit another man and he huwt him because blood started coming out." Zoe said bluntly. "That was sup-posed to be secret!" Zach whined and threw fire at her. It was just to startle her because it wouldn't hurt her. "Hey, hey! Don't fight with fire or no WcDonalds for you!" Wanda scolded. "And no TV for a week, thanks for being sincere. You owe me 10 bucks, dear, I told you that DVD was left out for a reason." Seb grinned at his wife.

"How are we going there? Walking?" Dillon grimaced. Stan laughed. "We've got a bunch of cars between the lot of us."

"I can walk. Better yet, I can teleport us there." Miz spoke up quickly. "Yes!" All the cousins exclaimed, excited, but Seb's eye widened. "Wait, Miz! Wait!" Before he could do anything, the girl grinned and they already left the park. Seb gagged when they appeared in an alleyway. Miz wasn't dumb, she wouldn't make 16 people pop up in the middle of the restaurant. The adults cursed under their breaths, the teens groaned and the toddlers whimpered and clung to their parents' legs.

"That was not fun…" Zoe pouted. Miz rolled her eyes. Weak humans. "Molecular transport takes some getting used to." She shrugged. Wormholes would be less disorienting but required her to fold reality, which used more energy to do. "It'll be less uncomfortable next time since your atoms would be more used to it." Dipper groaned. "Even time travel didn't feel that bad." Miz pulled on Ford's hand. "Come on~" she dragged him over to the door. "I want a Big Whack! And a fish fillet! And chicken nuggets! And fries!"

"Am I supposed to pay for you?" Ford asked wryly as he followed her into the restaurant. It was decently busy but not too much. There was a large play area to the side where a couple of other children were already running around. "Well I can't exactly give them GOLD now can I?" Miz whined. Stupid paper money system. Why did people have to stop accepting precious metals as currency anyway? Oh right, paper was easier to carry around. Ford nodded. That was fair. Miz leaned against him. "I can pay you back in gold or whatever other material you want later."

"...well I HAVE been meaning to get some Uranium for my experiments…" Ford mused.

"You better not be building a nuclear reactor in your workshop~" Miz teased. Ford scoffed. "I have a good team back there...and at least Uranium is relatively harmless when handled properly." Though… if all the safety protocols were in place, he could build a small nuclear reactor...

"That's good, wouldn't want more nuclear waste ending up in Gravity Falls' water supply…" Miz rolled her eyes. "They're fucked enough as is." Ford blinked as he thought about that. Okay, yeah, probably a bad idea then. "Quite."

The two made it to the counter as the rest of their group came in, the kids screaming for a Chipper Meal. The woman at the register, who looked quite tired even this early in the afternoon, managed a polite smile. "Hi. Welcome to WcDonalds, where we put the Whack in your snack."

"Right. Yes. I would like a Big Whack, large fries, chicken nuggets...ah… the 30 pieces one..." (Miz probably wanted the largest amount.) Ford looked at the menu. He didn't eat at such establishments often and didn't know what they had. "A coffee." He said at last. Miz poked him in the ribs and he squeaked. "You need more food than that! I know you're actually a little hungry." He just didn't know what food was here and was too awkward to stand there and stare at the menu in silence as he read through it. Luckily for him, she knew what he would like. One of the perks of being a mind-reader. She turned to the cashier and smiled kindly. "A fish sandwich and a WcChicken also. And some barbeque sauce please."

"Is that it?" The girl asked. Miz looked over at the drink machine. "A cup for water." She grinned. The woman nodded and tapped a few buttons. "That'll be $22.45" she said. Ford was amazed how cheap that was for 3 sandwiches, nuggets, fries and a coffee. Of course, this was the reason people ate at such establishments. Cheap and quick. He pulled out exact change (because he was the type who did that) and handed the women his money.

She printed out a receipt, something Ford found useless, what was he going to do? Return the food? But he took it with a polite nod and Miz waved at the woman "Thank you very much ma'am! Have a nice day!" The cashier smiled a bit brighter as she waved back. Ford looked down at Miz while they stepped over to the waiting area where a few people were waiting already. "That was...kind of you." He was a little surprised at it. Miz shrugged. "I've worked at a dine and dash restaurant. I know how much it sucks. So I want to try and be nice if I can."

Ford found himself smiling. "I didn't realize you worked before?" He tried to imagine Bill Cipher manning a cash register and nearly choked. It was too ridiculous to think about. Miz nodded, not seeing the hysterical look on Ford's face as she stared into the kitchen behind the counter. "I worked multiple jobs. Not all of them as Bill of course. But I wanted to earn actual money I could use. You know the Federation only accepts Credits. I got sick of pawning off metals and gemstones for money." Hooray for alternative income.

"That's surprisingly considerate of you." Ford was amazed all over again just how different this Bill Cipher was from his own despite their similar personalities. While Ford and Miz waited for their food, his triplets and younger brother all leaned on the counter as their wives took the toddlers to wash their hands.

"Hi! We want food!" Stan smiled at the woman behind the counter. She frowned and leaned a bit to search for the man. Didn't she just take this man's order? "Um, weren't you just here with your daughter, sir?" she asked politely. Shermie and Seb started laughing loudly and Stanley grinned widely. "Yeah...that was our brother, we're triplets." he pointed at Seb who waved with a 'Whattup' "And even add Shermie if you want, we look kind of similar too."

"But yeah, you could say he was her 'Daddy'!" Shermie whispered to Seb and he nearly fell to the floor laughing hysterically. The woman smiled, confused but amused by the men's antics. "What can I get for you?" Stan ordered his part, Shermie did his and finally Seb. They paid and went to stand up behind Ford with huge grins. Seb noticed Miz was holding hands with Ford, her small fingers intertwined with his own, one finger between each of his. Seb wanted to squeal at how cute it looked.

Then he remembered what Shermie said seconds ago and the cute moment was ruined for him. He gave Shermie a light slap. The man protested but saw the angry pout on his older brother's face and laughed. The three men quietly snuck up behind Ford so they could eavesdrop on their conversation. "-nd I got fired because I was sassing the customers. I couldn't help myself you know? I don't have a filter and when I get grumpy I let everyone know." Miz was complaining. "It WAS quite rude of them to fire you over text message. No warning or anything?" Ford gasped.

"Naw. They just texted me 'You don't have to come in tomorrow' and that was it." She sighed. "I know it was my fault for being rude to people but...they weren't even paying me all that much so I guess I don't really give a fuck in the end." She pouted. "I do miss the free tea though. That was the best perk of the job."

The brothers pouted. This wasn't something interesting they could use against Ford later…But on the good side, who knew Bill Cipher had a job? A job besides being a demon god at least. Did that even count as job?

Finally the food arrived and after taking the trays, Wanda asked, "Did everyone wash their hands?" Miz rolled her eyes. "I cleaned you all during the teleport." She shuddered. "I hate getting dirt on me." Stan laughed. "Really now?"

"It gets between my bricks and feels so gross. At least if it was salt I can just rinse it off in the shower. But dirt and sand just feels gross." Ford nodded slowly. He had never thought of how Bill's triangular body worked. Well, he did, he was always thinking and theorizing, but he never thought of asking his "muse", fearing he could offend Bill and he would leave. Maybe...Miz would let him see? Brightening up at the thought, he let Miz steal some fries as he took the tray to the table.

"You're going to eat all that?" Carla laughed when Miz sat and opened two of the sandwiches. "I like food!" The demon said simply. She took a bite of the Big Whack and moaned. Burger! Real cow flesh! Space Boof tasted similar enough but it really wasn't the same. The taste was nostalgic.

"Dad I want to take the tray!" Diego made grabby motions with his hands and Stan grimaced. "I got this." Seb whispered to him and nodded, telling him to give Diego the tray as he was giving his twins one for each one to take. The toddlers grabbed the trays and took them to the table proudly, with Seb keeping them still and floating so it wouldn't be too heavy for them. He winked at Wanda when she saw it. She rolled her eyes fondly. The kids slid the trays onto the table and cheered, climbing into the chairs and going for the fries immediately.

They let them, as long as they eat the hamburger too there was no problem. The Pines joked and laughed as they had lunch. Miz told them about the less perturbing fun adventures she had and the weird deals some people called her for. Ford and Stan told them a bit about space and the other dimensions they'd been to, something they didn't do much. Everyone listened and paid attention, even the kids. They were really close, and they wished they could be like this every day, see their niblings and brothers everyday.

It was Dillon who brought it up first, staring at Miz when she finished her own food and began snatching bits from other people's trays. "Where is all of that going?" Miz paused with her cheeks bulging as she shoved an entire chicken nugget in her mouth. She flushed. "M-my thighs…and my belly… if I need to store energy that I can't contain within my Self." She admitted in embarrassment. Stan snorted. "Is that why you're so bottom heavy?" Clara smacked his arm with an indignant "Stan!" while Miz buried her face in her hands and whined. "I burn it off! I do!" Miz wiggled in her seat. "And it's not my fault my bottom gets wider when I grow larger! I'm an equilateral triangle!" Seb couldn't help but laugh and he was equally smacked on his arm by his wife. "Don't be mean!"

"Well, at least I can grow taller, unlike SOMEONE!" Miz sipped her lemonade (ask for cup of water, put NOT water in it! Mwahaha! Truly she was the epitome of evil!) as everyone lost their shit at the incredibly sick burn. Seb huffed. No fair that he didn't have shapeshifting powers like Miz. How did she do that anyway? "Well, you're still pudgy." Seb pouted. "I'm fluffy!" Miz protested.

"But you're not a triangle?" Zach was quite confused. Miz sighed. "I have multiple different forms. I'm currently a dragon but my main form is a triangle." She pressed a hand to her leg and wondered at how unfair it was that her humanoid forms were capable of gaining weight if she stayed in them too long and ran out of room in her personal Capacity. At least she could literally burn it off by throwing around her powers and using up all the stored energy. It was still embarrassing. Luckily she always returned to her base form if she shapeshifted back and forth. Though that might have been from the energy loss. Note to self, test that out.

"I wanna see your triangle form!" Zoe bounced in her seat. Miz giggled. "Maybe later, some other time."

Of course the problem of getting back to the house came up (no one wanted to risk teleportation while on a full stomach.) They picked up the children and carried them as they walked back to Sebastian and Wanda's house. It was far but it wasn't too far. Seb held Zoe while Wanda carried Zach. Stan was holding Diego while Ford found himself carrying Miz. ("Pick me up, mortal!"). There was light conversation but for the most part the walk home was quiet. Everyone was tired after eating, so close to slipping into food comas.

They finally made it home and, more tired than expected, they all settled down for a midday nap. That walk under the spring sun was exhausting. They all collapsed in the living room, cuddling with their children. Ford was still holding Miz. He was running his fingers through her hair as she purred. She had demanded he keep up his side of the Deal, to which Ford complied with a fond chuckle. Seb sat beside Ford and reached to pet her too. "This is the best happy ending." Miz murmured. "You did good Seb."

Looking at her and knowing what she'd been bottling up inside for the past few weeks, Seb said. "I know you'll find it too. Your own happy ending." Miz pressed her head against Seb's chest. "I hope so." She drifted off to sleep while wondering if something like her even deserved a happy ending.

Unsurprisingly, it was Mabel who woke first. The sun had set and everyone else was still asleep. She looked around blearily until she remembered what happened. Right. They all played and ate and passed out. Mabel carefully got up from the people pile (most of them were slumped over the sofas but a couple had gone to their rooms in the magic guest wing of the house) so Mabel clearly saw Ford, Seb and Miz curled around each other.

She silently squealed and pulled out her phone for a picture. The sun may be going down but there were many faint night lights around the house (Seb had a habit of waking up in the middle of the night and after nearly falling down the stairs once, Wanda had them installed) that gave her enough light to get a cute photo. She cursed when she realized her phone wasn't on silent and the distinct click of the camera rang out in the silence of the room, loud from it's suddenness.

Ford was the first to stir and open his eyes, narrowing them as he looked around for the source of the noise. Mabel grinned sheepishly. "Hello, uncle Ford." She greeted. "Hello…" He yawned and, still tired, unconsciously snuggled closer to his human sized pillows. Mabel cooed. "Just continue sleeping, you big owl…" She planted a kiss on his cheek and went to her room. Ford obeyed and closed his eyes again.

When the parents of the toddlers woke up that evening, the first thing they realized was that sleeping on the couch wasn't really fun anymore. The second thing was that they never gave dinner to their toddlers and they will be demanding food sometime soon.

Carla and Wanda snuck out to the kitchen to start working on dinner only to stop when they found the Pines Triplets already working. "Sixer stop trying to help you suck at this!" Stan laughed while Ford scoffed. "I am perfectly capable of preparing a meal! I lived on my own for quite some time."

"Yeah but even if YOU can somehow survive on coffee, our kids need real nutrients." Sebastian stirred the pancake batter. Ford pouted. "I can make more than coffee! I can make eggs and...toast! And pasta!" Stan scoffed. "You've already burned two eggs, just let us handle this. We're professionals!" Nevermind the fact that they were making breakfast food for dinner. Fuck food rules!

"No you're not." Ford protested. "You went to college for business and-"

"Why do you always assume we need a degree to be good at something? I thought you got over that." Stan teased. Ford flushed. "Well I do admit you can be quite skilled in a field even without a degree, but that doesn't make you a professional."

"You're a professional." Seb laughed. "A professional buzz kill~" The two younger triplets laughed while Ford sputtered and crossed his arms. "Well fine, I guess you don't deserve my help with dinner!" Wanda and Carla watched them discuss back and forth. It was so funny to watch. "Oh no, Stan, we lost the company of Stanford Pines! What should we do!" Sebastian cried. "Maybe we can cook faster?" Stan sniggered.

Ford huffed, offended, and turned to leave, but found his two sisters-in-law watching them with their arms crossed. "Oh...good evening." He straightened and gave them what he hoped was a polite smile. Wanda and Carla laughed at his awkward face as Wanda walked inside. "Don't worry, handsome, I still think you make pretty great coffee." She joked and patted Ford's cheek before moving to kiss Sebas. The younger man pulled her closer to him, holding her by the waist while glaring at Ford. When they pulled apart, Wanda laughed. "You don't mind if I call him that, do you?" She pouted teasingly. "Of course I mind, I'm MUCH more handsome than Sixer." Seb pouted.

"You're triplets." Carla laughed as she went up to kiss her own husband. Stan rubbed his nose against hers. "Morning, most handsome~" Carla laughed as she gave Stan a little squeeze. "I thought that we were triplets?" Seb raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, but my Stanny is better." Carla grinned. Wanda pushed up her sleeves. "Oh you wanna fight for the title, McCorkle?"

"Only if you aren't too afraid, Friedmann!"

Stan and Seb beamed at the thought of their wives fighting for them.

"We literally can't look any more handsome than the other scientifically speaking if we are identical triplets…" Ford mumbled, confused. Was it what couples usually did? Acting all sweet and fighting for their partners? Stan and Seb looked over at Ford and frowned. "Too bad Miz is still asleep. I would have liked to see her get in on this too." Stan sighed. "That would make it a three way battle for which of us is the most handsome."

Ford scratched his head. "I suppose...but why Miz specifically? I mean, Carla is clearly going to choose Stanley and Wanda chooses Sebastian, are you hoping for Miz to be the tie breaker?" His brothers rolled their eyes so much they disappeared behind their eyelids. Someone help this poor, naive, stupid man! "Ford…" Seb whined. "Why are you so dumb?"

"I am not dumb!" Ford glared. "I have 12 PhDs." He stated proudly, even after all this time he couldn't help bragging. His brothers both rolled their eyes. "I feel...kinda bad for Miz now." Stan muttered. Seb shook his head "I don't know what she sees in him." The two turned to each other and said in unison ""Probably the great sex."" unfortunately, Ford didn't hear them, going back to check the coffee machine.

Ford just comforted himself with passing them whatever stuff they needed as they worked on making breakfast-dinner. Their wives (the beautiful rays of sunshine that they were) said they would wake up the rest of the house so the triplets were alone once again as the women left the kitchen. Seb pouted when he remembered how Wanda called Ford handsome. "Do you think they would recognize us if we dressed the same?" Stan rubbed his chin. "Worth a shot. We can all change our clothes and see if there's any difference?" He looked down at his clothes. "No offense Seb, I don't think your clothes would fit us." Sebastian scoffed and held out his hand. "Deal to make our clothes all look the same for the next half hour?"

"And what do I get in return?" Stan narrowed his eyes at the youngest triplet. "What else do you want besides my unconditional love, you ungrateful sack of flesh?" Seb pretended to growl. Stan snickered and shook his hand. "Deal." The blue flame flashed out and the three of them found themselves all dressed in a trenchcoat, a sweater that covered their chins and dark glasses. Stan pulled at his sweater. "Do we really need to cover our chins?"

"Yes." Seb folded his arms over his chest. They all had gloves on as well. Stan shrugged. "Fair enough." Ford sighed. "I don't see the point of this but it IS an interesting experiment." To their surprise, the first person to walk into the kitchen was Miz. She was yawning as she rubbed her eyes and the men immediately went quiet, waiting for her to notice. Miz blinked and stared at them. She blinked again, a confused look on her face. She rubbed her eyes and squinted at them, thoroughly perplexed. "Huh?" Stan and Seb barely managed to hold in their laughter as Miz continued to look back and forth at them with a cute, lost expression. "Eh?!" She cried. Wanda and Carla came in at that point and stopped dead in their tracks. Stan put his hands behind his back and coughed a bit. Preparing for the show. "Eh, good evening, Miz." They could imitate each other's voices almost perfectly. This was going to be so fun! Miz turned to Stan. "Fordsie?" she asked.

"Clearly." Stan sighed. "My brothers wanted to try an experiment to see if Carla and Wanda could recognize them, but I am clearly not participating in their games." Carla rolled her eyes. "Really Stan? I can tell it's you." She walked up to Stan and pulled his glasses off to kiss his nose. "I'm your wife. You think I can't tell?" Stan laughed. "Well you got me, but can Wanda find Seb?"

Miz was staring at Stan in shock. "...not Fordsie?" she asked. She looked at the remaining two men. Ford and Seb remained silent, not risking their speech giving them away, even if they could do perfect impressions of each other, that was clearly not enough since Stan was found out immediately. As Miz continued to look between the two of them with growing agitation, Wanda laughed and walked over to Seb, easily picking him out and giving him a kiss on the nose as well. "I admit it threw me off for a second, but I'd know you anywhere."

"Clearly because I'm the most handsome right?" Seb coo'ed at her. "If you hadn't chosen me I would have cried forever." Wanda rolled her eyes. "You need to stand up straight, remember what I've been telling you? Ford has a perfect posture."

Miz turned to the remaining man. "...Ford?" she asked, looking so unsure of herself that Ford sighed and pulled his glasses off. "Well this was an interesting experiment." He pulled out his journal. "Miz, you...really couldn't tell which one of us was which, could you?" he asked her with a firm expression. Miz looked down, ashamed. "...no…" Ford nodded and took off his gloves to write down this observation. "Is this something all Bills have trouble with? Telling us apart?" He wondered aloud. Miz flinched. "...I'm sorry…"

"No, I wasn't blaming you. This is very interesting to know." Ford jotted down more notes. "Tell me, how do you normally tell us apart?" Miz looked up at him before fiddling with her dress and shrugging. "Like...your colors...and your outline…"

"What is that supposed to mean?" Stan frowned. "That doesn't make any sense." The others were now watching the proceeding, not quite interrogation, with interest. Ford pointed at Wanda "Miz, can you describe Wanda for me?"

"Um...she's got yellowish hair that goes 'shoop' down like that and green eyes...and she's female." Miz replied. Wanda raised an eyebrow. What sort of description was that? Ford nodded and pointed at Carla. "And her?"

"She's got brown hair that goes ''floof and boing' and it's really long." Miz made hand motions that looked like she was drawing Carla's hair. Now the other people in the room were frowning as they listened. Ford scribbled some more stuff down. "Now describe me and my brothers."

"Ah…" Miz looked over at the other two. "Well Seb used to be half yellow but he's only brown now. And he has an eyepatch. Stan is bigger and doesn't have an eyepatch. And you...have glasses and the funny chin." Miz concluded.

"Please describe our faces." Ford asked. Miz looked stumped. "You've got two eyes, a nose and a mouth."

"But what do they look like." Ford stressed. Miz struggled a little "Your nose is a slightly darker color? You have fluffy eyebrows. Your chin is kinda squarish?" She was beginning to look distressed. "I'm sorry." She hung her head and sniffled. Ford pet her head. "It's ok. I'm not mad. I don't think this is your fault."

"Ford? What the fuck is going on?" Stan asked. The eldest brother sighed. "This Bill came from a society of shapes and colors. Her species probably evolved to see things by their shapes, their 'outlines' as it were." he looked at her distressed expression. "We humans, evolved to see faces, specifically, human faces. We're so good at it that our brains will even mistakenly believe we see faces in places where there are none, like weirdly shaped rocks or shadows." Seb snorted something along the lines of "Rock that looks like a face, rock."

Ford looked at Miz who seemed quite upset. "This is an ability that I'm certain Bill's species doesn't have." He ran a hand through his hair. "Which amazes me that he's capable of creating a human form so detailed." Ford stared at Miz with narrowed eyes. "That form you're wearing. You copied it off someone didn't you?"

Miz's eyes went wide and she looked away. "I'm sorry…" She repeated. Ford shook his head. "I'm not mad. I just want to confirm my hypothesis. You mentioned that you only have a couple of human forms that you can swap between. Is this because creating a human form with a unique appearance is difficult for you?"

Slowly, Miz nodded. It had taken her a lot of tweaking to get Xin's body right. She had to physically put her hands on the construct to mould and shape it. Imagining the face in her head didn't work all that well. Even Jan-Jan's form had been based on/inspired by multiple fan art she remembered seeing from back when she was human. William's form had taken a lot of work too. And Miz's form...was simply what she remembered herself to be. This form was a copy. Taken straight from her memories. Splotchy and blurred as they were. Ford wrote down this confirmation. "It seems I'm right." He concluded. Stan growled "Right about what? I don't understand what you're getting at?"

"Miz, or rather, Bill Cipher, is face blind." Ford said simply. "Of course, this doesn't mean she can't learn to tell humans apart, but it seems she has no natural ability to discern the details of a human face and must use context clues to know who people are." He laughed "How fascinating. But this also means Miz will not be able to accurately tell us which of us is the handsomest. Even if she's capable of telling most humans apart and judging their appearances, triplets like us or any other humans who are similar looking will be all but impossible for her to tell apart."

Seb frowned. "But...I don't have any problem with that?"

"You're human." Ford told Seb. "Your body is human and so is your brain. Miz however, ISN'T human. Even if she can make herself look like one." Seb hummed, curious. Still as Bill, he could recognize a human face, he remembered seeing those guards when he was arrested...Although he hadn't known what they were and that memory is filled with a tremendous sense of confusion. He was pretty sure being face blind wasn't a Bill Cipher thing, so much as it was a Miz thing. He pointed that out and Ford only looked more interested. "So perhaps Miz's dimension of Shapes were built biologically different, or yours was. I would have to meet with more Bills in other dimensions to know for sure."

Ford petted the girl's hair when she still appeared distressed by this subject. "I'm sorry...I can try harder?" She apologised again. "The fact that you can tell us apart normally is fine. You're doing very well. You have nothing to be sorry for." Ford assured her. "Actually I find this all quite fascinating."

"...I can still tell handsomeness apart you know?" Miz mumbled. The men all laughed. "Ok. Tie breaker. Which triplet is the handsomest?" Seb asked as he stood up straight and gave her a charming smirk. "Seb." Miz grinned. "2nd is Ford and then Stan."

"Hah! I win!" Wanda cheered while Stan gasped dramatically. "Yeah well, your vote doesn't count anyway." Carla kissed her husband. "It's alright, Stanny. I know I've got the cutest one." Wanda looked at Seb and shook her head with a pout. Nope. She wasn't right. She didn't know what she was talking about. Sebastian laughed and sat Wanda on the kitchen's isle to give her a kiss on her lips. "I'm the luckiest one too." He whispered to her.

Stan narrowed his eyes and picked up Carla as well. The woman yelped, startled. "I can do push-ups with my wife on my back! I don't need a table." He taunted. Ford rolled his eyes. Couples. He was glad he wasn't like them and didn't do their ridiculous ritual of showing their affection. Miz sat down next to Ford. "Fordsie, are you upset that I said you aren't the most handsome?" Ford laughed. "I am not upset, Miz. Don't worry. I don't really care about that."

"Well, you're in 2nd place just by a little bit!"

Ford patted her head with a smile. "Alright, thank you."

Shermie entered the kitchen, talking on the phone and with Mabel on his back, still sleepy. "Yes, Abi we are fine, yes the twins are happy and we miss you so, so, so much!" He cooed as his older brothers watched him. "Yes, we will be arriving home tomorrow, honey...Dipper asked if you could buy him pens ...yes, he bit through the ones he brought here...ok, sweetie, love ya." He hung up while his brothers and sisters-in law all said "Aaaww!"

"The little baby lovebirds!" Seb grinned. "Urgh, don't bother me. You're just as bad." Shermie pushed Seb gently. He glanced around. "Why're you all wearing the same clothes?"

"We had an experiment to see if Carla and Wanda could recognize us even while we looked the same." Seb explained and Stan laughed. "YOU wouldn't be able to tell us apart though."

"What?! Of course I could! I was a kid when you all dressed up the same to try to confuse me!" Shermie protested. "Ok, turn around then." Wanda instructed. Shermie groaned but obeyed. The triplets put on their disguises and Carla told Shermie he could turn around now. "Fuck...why are you even the same height now?" The younger man mumbled. He really sucked at this. He looked at their hands. Gloves. His mortal enemy. He looked at one of them and pointed. "You are definitely Sebastian."

Seb laughed. "Aaww, you can recognize your favorite brother!"

"And I could see the eyepatch." Shermie confessed sheepishly. Mabel was still clinging to his back, stirring slightly. "Alright you two…" Shermie looked between the remaining two. "Stan...ley?"

"Close. Stanford." 'Stanford' sighed. "Oh fuck." Shermie cursed. "I can't believe you don't recognize us, Sherm!" 'Stanley' cried. "I am sorry! You know that-" 'Stanley' smiled and took off his gloves, revealing six fingers. 'Stanford' started cackling and showed him a five-fingered hand. "I hate you." Shermie said at the end, realizing they were just fucking with him.

The rest of the family filed in. Miz had left without them noticing and came back in as Xin with the twins. He had them tucked under each arm and they giggled as he swung them back and forth. "Come on gremlins, everyone's gonna be leaving after dinner so make sure you say bye to them."

"No…" they didn't want their cousins to leave. They wished everyone could live nearby. Xin handed the kids to their parents before flicking more food into existence to feed the large, hungry family. Mabel was gently placed on a chair. "I am getting too old to carry you like that, sweetie." Shermie apologized when Mabel pouted. "Old he says…" Stan rolled his eyes. The guy was just in his 30's, what was he complaining about? They lost their better years being trapped in the portal or working on said portal. Stan couldn't believe he was already in his 40s. Where had all the years went?

As they set the table, Dillon, carrying Diego, and Dipper came in, yawning. "I passed out on the couch and now I'm dying." Dillon groaned. "Hi Mommy! Hi Daddy!" Diego waved at his parents. Dipper waved at everyone as well. "Can't you stay a little longer?" Zoe asked as she climbed into her chair. "I want you to be here with us forever!" Mabel ruffled her hair "That would be awesome but we have school and jobs. I know first hand that wishing for something to last forever is a bad idea…"

"Yeah. Bad idea, don't wish for it." Dipper shook his head.

"Why would it be bad to wish that my family is always with me?" Zoe insisted.

Xin grinned "Because you might get trapped in a bubble with caricatures of your friends and family who ride skateboards and dab after every sentence…" Dipper shuddered violently. "Ugh, I hated that guy...I hated him so much!" the memory of Dippy Fresh still haunted him. Those stupid glasses, that obnoxious voice...

"You broke his neck." Mabel commented lightly as she took a bite of her toast. Shermie stared at that information. "I'll just ignore that, I guess." Shermie nodded as he poured himself coffee. "Yup. Ignore the fact that my son apparently murdered someone…"

"He was a nightmare figment of Mabel's imagination." Dipper groaned. "Not human, not even alive. But 100% evil."

"Awesome." Zoe grinned as Zach flinched and said "Scary."

"Besides, you'll get to see your cousins again soon, kids." Wanda handed them with glasses of milk. "Dad's birthday is next and it's your Uncles Stan's turn to host it."

Stan smiled. "Right! We can even go to a trip to New Jersey to show ya the beach we went to as kids!" The cousins smiled in excitement. That sounded nice! At least one summer to relax and take it easy before they go back to school and in the toddlers' case, start kindergarten. "It'll be weird not spending summer in Gravity Falls." Dipper admitted. Ford laughed "There was weirdness in Jersey too. You'll find things to do."

"Plus, Ma tells me the boardwalk has new shops and attractions." Stan pointed out. He smiled. "Remember when we hunted the Jersey Devil?"

"That thing almost killed us. Good times." Seb laughed.

The family chatted and laughed for a little more before dinner was over. Zoe and Zach watched sadly as their family's bags were brought to the front door. They knew they would see each other again soon, but they didn't like waiting. Diego didn't seem too eager to leave either and clung to Seb's leg as Stan tried to pull him away. The kid was strong as hell! "No! One more day!" He pleaded. Seb and his family, Xin included, stood by the door to wave at their family's cars. Mabel waved excitedly as Dipper put on his earphones and smiled at them, sitting on the passenger seat next to his dad. Diego was shouting, and Dillon was laughing. Finally, when the two cars were gone, Ford walked towards his car as well.

"Well, I'm off to my research." He grinned. Xin pouted. "Can I pop by to visit you for another session?"

"Of course. We have a Deal don't we?"

Seb and Wanda were both blushing heavily. How could they talk so openly about that? Xin grinned and gave Ford a quick hug before he got in his car. "I'll be seeing you tonight then~" Xin giggled.

"See you in the summer, Sixer!" Seb smiled and his brother returned it. "See you in summer." He nodded. The five of them sighed when Ford's car disappeared. "Well, that was a fun weekend…" Seb said lightly as he closed the door and the twins ran inside. He sat down on the couch with Wanda and Miz (Xin having shrunk back into his other form) happily climbed between the two of them. It didn't take long for the twins to come back screaming.

"Sir Bedazzle's not hewe! He's gone!" They cried. Seb took a deep breath, closed his eye to search for the acorn and then nodded. "Ok…" He pulled out his phone and dialed someone. "Shermie...Hey, yeah, me again. Mabel is taking Sir Bedazzle with her, can you-Yeah, ok, thank you."

He sighed. "Can't believe Shooting Star tried to steal our pet." Miz leaned against him and giggled. "Can't you really?" She teased. Seb coughed "No, this is definitely something she would do." Minutes later, the bell rang and Dipper was standing behind the door with the happy creature wiggling in his hands. "I can't believe you, Mabel!" He shouted at the girl in the car who was being sternly scolded by Shermie. "Hey, so, here's Sir Bedazzle." The boy laughed sheepishly. "She was hiding him in her backpack."

"Sir Bedazzle!" Zoe and Zach cried as they ran up to take their pet back. The Acorn-puppy barked and licked them as soon as he was back in their hands. The twins hugged him close. "Don't let people kidnap you again!" Zoe scolded. Sir Bedazzle just gave her a cheerful, clueless look and barked.

Seb patted his nephew's shoulder and nodded. "Thanks, Pinetree, now go."

"Sorry, man…" Dipper apologized on Mabel's behalf and trotted back to the car. Mabel was pouting angrily. Now this time, for real, Shermie and his kids left. Without taking anything from the house.

The couple (and Miz), again collapsed in the living room. A long, weird weekend, but fun. Just like Pines were used to. Miz snuggled on Sebastian's lap. "Pet me?" She asked. He laughed and ran his fingers through her hair. She purred quietly. Wanda watched them and sighed. "I can never tell what I should feel here."

"What do you mean?" Seb asked.

"Miz...is like a daughter. An older sister to our children, a younger sister to you and part of me feels like she really is another child. But she's older than our planet and can be an adult sometimes. So I don't know how to feel."

Seb leaned on her shoulder as he continued to pet the purring girl. "Don't think too much about it, love...nothing will make much sense when it comes to Bill Cipher…" He kissed her pouting lips. "You just need to know she likes you a lot, like, I bet she would be growling at you if she didn't, and she's my friend, my soul sister, a crazy demon that likes head pats and loves taking care of us and the children...as long as you continue pampering her when she wants, she won't mind what you think of her as."

Wanda really didn't understand. But she supposed it was simply how things were when you marry a magical former-All powerful demon and currently have his demon sister living with you. She brushed Miz's hair as well. "It's just weird to think of Miz as my daughter...and knowing she's in a relationship with my husband's brother...as an adult man."

Seb laughed at how stupidly hilarious that sounded. "Well...you are right, I can't argue with that...but you aren't very different" Miz (half dozing off) grabbed his hand when he stopped patting her to let him know he shouldn't stop. "Your poor mom would faint if she knew what you got married to..."

"My mom just wanted me to give her grandchildren, I'm not sure she would mind if she knew you have...demon powers…"

Seb closed his eyes and sighed contently, glad he was actually alive to be with them today, glad the Axolotl didn't actually let him die when he tried ending it. "Just don't think about it...just freeze your brain…" He sang softly, remembering the musical they illegally watched on MeTube and the woman laughed. "Dork…"

Wanda closed her eyes and relaxed, enjoying the warmth of her husband's embrace and Miz who acted like a little radiator. They all jumped when the sprinklers turned on and soaked them as the twins screamed ""She/He did it!""

Miz helped tuck the kids in that night after a story about one of the adventures she had with her friends. The kids loved hearing about the chaos they got up to. Miz kissed them both on the forehead and left the room. Sometimes she shared a bed with one of them and sometimes she slipped in with Seb and Wanda. They asked her if she wanted her own room but Miz just couldn't stand sleeping in a room alone. Tonight however, she was going to visit Ford. She sighed as she wondered what they would do in their session tonight. She said her good nights to Seb and Wanda before dispersing her physical body and flying through the Mindscape towards where she could feel Ford was. She worried a little about whether he remembered.

Ford reached Gravity Falls a few hours ago and marched from the Shack towards a door that led to his research center. It was late in the night, but his scientists, just like him, were masochists and liked to stay awake long into the night while researching. With his trusty coffee mug in hand, he swept through the hallways. "Dr. Pines." A woman, with her third cup of coffee in hand, saluted him as she walked past. Ford gave her a polite nod. "Dr. Curie." they exchanged no other words, both being in a rush to get back to their projects. He entered his personal workspace, a large lab with a sturdy desk, multiple computers and plenty of half-finished projects littering the lab benches. He took a sip of his coffee and picked up a clipboard to check on what needed his attention first.

"Ooh~nice place."

Ford jumped and nearly spilled his coffee. He turned to see Xin leaning over one of the lab benches, examining the prototype solar engine he was working on. If he got it working they could make solar powered cars without having to manufacture new cars, simply attach the panels to the roof and it would convert the energy over into any electric car. It would help cut down the CO2 emissions and make it so petroleum would no longer be so necessary. Frankly, he had all the knowledge and technology needed to make such a thing but the oil companies weren't very happy with the idea of solar powered cars cutting off their profit and were doing their best to cut his funding or otherwise impede his progress. Also, while Ford's engine worked, it didn't have a good enough battery storage yet to power a car for more than 8 hours before it used up all it's storage. Perfectly fine when it was sunny out, but it would be next to useless otherwise.

He stared at Xin for a few seconds before he remembered he HAD in fact, invited the man over this night for another session. He sighed. "Right, I forgot."

"What's with this container? You can't use Alkaline batteries to hold solar energy. This is a solar panel right? They require a different kind of battery...you'd need Lithium for this." Xin poked at the prototype. "Of course, Solariathian works better but I don't think humans have discovered that particular substance yet…"

Ford felt his face light up as an epiphany hit him. He was friends with a NICE Bill Cipher. A brilliant, all-knowing Muse who would definitely know how to help him with his research!

Just like his Bill had been before the betrayal...

Ford shook his head. That Bill may have been using him the whole time...but...Ford didn't like to admit this, not to anyone else and least of all to himself, but he had really admired his Bill. Speaking with him had been like a breath of fresh air after being trapped in a stagnant basement all his life. Finally he had found someone who GETS IT. Someone just as intelligent, no, more so, than he was and offered him so much insight into all sorts of technological advancements he'd never even considered.

Bill had truly been his muse, his inspiration, his GOD. Ford sometimes thought back to the time before he'd learned his Bill's true nature. How much he had cherished every moment he had together with his muse. How much he looked forward to seeing Bill in his dreams so he could discuss all sorts of ideas he had for inventions and innovations that could change the world.

Bill Cipher was dead. Killed in order to save the world and Ford was glad for it. But a small part of him had despaired over losing him. His knowledge and insight that Ford craved even now. He never quite got over Bill. And now...he had Xin, a Bill Cipher from another dimension who was NICE and liked him and could probably be convinced to help him with his research.

Like his Bill had promised to do.

Ford shook his head. He was getting ahead of himself. He was just...so overwhelmed at the idea that he could have this. Have Xin here with him as the Bill he'd always dreamed of having. The perfect Bill Cipher. Intelligent, kind, supportive...dear god he had longed for this. Ford took a deep breath and tried to compose himself. He had to remember that Xin wasn't his Bill. There was no guarantee Xin would agree to helping him with his research. Ford tried not to get his hopes up.

Xin wagged his tail back and forth lazily, dressed in a simple cheongsam with a high slit along the sides to expose his shapely legs. He poked around at Ford's research and found himself amazed all over again at the innovation of humanity. Ford had built a working Temporal Displacement device without any of the solid Helium microchips that Time Baby constructed his Time Tapes out of. Of course, Ford had labeled the device 'Always fresh sandwich holder' so Xin had a feeling Ford actually didn't realize what he had built. Then again, that body switching Electron Carpet was amazing in ways that Ford never seemed to realize either...

Xin picked up another device, his scan showed it was a solid light projector. The settings weren't fully stable so it would flicker out after a few seconds of being switched on but all it needed were a few crystals inserted inside the area in front of where the light emitted and it would be a working…

"You built a lightsaber?!" Xin laughed as he flicked the cylindrical device on to see a pale white beam of light appear before it flickered out. He liked it. Ford even built a soundbox into the side that made the 'PSSSHHH' noise when it turned on.

"Eh...I was trying out a few things and a man was speaking about the latest movie he saw so…"

Xin was amazed by the man's creations. He knew Fordsie's talents went much further than the portal and Electron Carpet. Canon Ford would have changed his world if he hadn't been trapped between dimensions, he hoped this Fordsie had the chance to do so. He seemed to be doing well for himself, his own lab, his own research facility with a bunch of other scientists…

Xin made a promise to himself to help his own Ford achieve such heights, no, MORE! He would help his own Ford be a man who changed his world. Ford sat down on his desk and watched Xin examine the artifact, his tail wagging excitedly. "I love this!" He finally declared. "You're such a dork and I love it!" The man rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, feeling his cheeks heating up at the praise. He loved praise dammit…

"How long have you had this research center?" Xin asked curiously. "Um, well...The Center is fairly new, it has been operating for two years now...I published, um, I published all my research about weirdness, with Fiddleford's name and mine, together. It was a boom in the scientific community, it opened a lot of doors for me to do more research, and it helped F to get recognized as an inventor as well." Shermie helped out too. Ford was amazed, he had to admit that he never thought much of his youngest brother, Shermie was so much smaller and Ford just hadn't CARED… but the youngest Pines brother was just as amazing and brilliant as the others, in his own way. After all, teenage father, made it through college and got himself a well paying programming job that allowed him to support his equally young wife and twin children… all before the age of 25...

Xin nodded, making a note of this. "Are you busy with anything right now? We can have our session another time?" he didn't want to bother Ford while he was working. Ford considered what to say. On one hand, he wasn't exactly busy, on the other, he didn't want Xin to leave. Ford scratched his head and tried to think of a way to ask Xin for his help with the projects. "We can do a quick session? And then...if you want...if it's not a bother, do you want to help me...can you help me look over some of my work and check for errors?"

Xin tilted his head before grinning. "Sure, no problem!" He looked around the lab. "Hm...you don't have a bed or a sofa in here?" He wasn't sure how it'd feel to do it on a hard metal table. Would it be uncomfortable? "We could go to the Shack, I don't have a bed in my workshop." That was silly. He barely slept anyway. "Or...we could go to the lounge? There is a small room with couches where people rest...sometimes. I bet it's empty right now."

Xin shrugged. "Alright. Are we going bare handed or do you want to try with some ropes?"

"It would be...interesting to see your reaction with ropes, but do you feel comfortable with that already?"

"I...don't know?" Xin frowned. "What if we just tried tying my hands as a test? No other stuff yet, just seeing how comfortable I am with my hands bound?" Xin placed a subtle protection ward around himself, so even if he panicked, his power would get redirected out into space instead of hurting the people around him. It wasn't a perfect solution since too much of that and there'd be a mysterious new planet popping into existence nearby- but it was just a precaution.

"Alright." Ford nodded. "Let me look for ropes and we can go." He searched in some boxes, in his drawers, and eventually found some. He hoped it wouldn't hurt Xin too much. "Ok, I got them, let's go." Xin watched Ford take off his white lab coat, leave it on his chair, and followed him through the hallways, retracting his tail and antlers as he went. As Ford said, there was a nice area in the center, away from the loud and noisy workplaces and laboratories, with couches, a small kitchen, a microwave and a TV. There were a few scientists who gave Xin weird looks as he followed after Ford, his bare legs occasionally peeking through the slits in his cheongsam. Heck, if Xin could get away with not wearing pants, he was gonna.

Xin sat down on the couch and looked at Ford. "Just tie my wrists together in front for now." He held his hands out and Ford took them gently. He held Xin's slender wrists and compared how dainty the dragon's hands were compared to his own. He could encircle Xin's wrists easily with one hand. "How tight do you want it?" He asked. Xin looked down at their hands. "Not tight, perhaps just loop the rope around?" Xin wiggled his fingers. "I don't actually have much experience with tying knots physically. Just materializing them already in place..." Ford grinned. Well, here was something HE knew more about. "I know plenty. Back when my brothers and I were planning to sail around the world, we learned all sorts of sailor's knots." He remembered one which was very secure but could still be undone easily with just a few twists. That should be good in case Xin started to panic and he had to get the rope off him quickly.

Xin's eyes never left Ford's hands, watching him through the whole process. Ford held Xin's wrists together (with Xin trembling the whole time), commenting on how slender they were, and looped the rope around them. He tied a simple bowline knot. He made sure it wasn't too tight and tugged it lightly. "How does that feel?"

Xin raised his hands up and twisted them, checking to see that he really couldn't break out. His heartbeat picked up a little and he took a few breaths to calm himself. Ford was immediately petting his head. "Is it too much? Should I take it off?" He asked with worry. Xin whimpered a little but shook his head. "No. I-I'm fine...I can do this…" He breathed carefully for a while as Ford sat beside him, watching him closely for any signs of escalating panic.

After a minute or so, Xin calmed. He closed his eyes and breathed out carefully. "Ok. I think I'm good now." He tugged at his hands again. It was firm but it wasn't tight enough to cut off his circulation. That's good. He sighed and leaned against Ford's chest. "I hate how slowly we're going." He admitted. "Well the point is to get you comfortable with this. We need to take it slow. Bindings are a major point of fear for most people, it's okay for you to feel apprehensive about it." Ford assured him. Xin nodded "I still feel like a baby for getting worked up over just some rope."

"Everyone has their own levels of comfort. You don't need to force yourself." Ford assured him. Xin hummed as he tugged on his hands again. "I think I prefer your hands. This is interesting but, ropes feel kinda impersonal. The texture is nothing like your skin."

"Do you want me to take it off?" Ford reached for the end of the rope but Xin pulled his hands away. "Not yet. We haven't even tried anything with this yet."

"Try? Like...what?"

Xin waved his bound hands up and down "Like, tugging, what if you were pulling at me?" Ford took the long end of the rope and tugged lightly. There was some resistance from Xin as he pulled back. "Are you suggesting a tug of war type situation?"

"Yeah. I'm being JUST tied up, so now let's try something more active." Xin tugged and pulled Ford forward with a yelp. Ford braced himself against the couch with one hand and looked at Xin's grin. "A competition?" the scientist asked. The dragon/demon responded by tugging again, stronger this time. Ford narrowed his eyes in challenge. "Alright then." He pulled, a quick, sharp tug that got Xin's hands to point away from his body. The bound man tried to pull back but Ford had more leverage here. He got up off the couch and gave another sharp tug. Xin yelped as he was pulled up into a standing position. He grumbled "Hey! At least give me some time to pull back!"

"Nope, I'm winning this one." Ford teased as he continued pulling Xin forward off the couch. The smaller man tugged back, the motion straining against the taut rope. It tightened a little and Xin grimaced. "Does this loosen if we pull on the other end?"

"I don't think so, should we stop before it gets too tight? That could make it too difficult to get your hands free afterward." Ford loosened his grip in worry. Xin hummed. "I can just burn it off if it's too hard to untie." Ford tightened his hold on the rope when Xin gave a hard tug that pulled Ford forward and he lost his balance, toppling onto Xin and pinning him to the sofa with his larger frame. Ford felt Xin's legs come up on either side of his hips and wrap around his waist. "Hah!" The dragon cheered. "Now you can't get back up!" Xin couldn't help but be reminded of wrestling with little Sixer back in that other dimension. That had been fun. He wondered how that bitch was doing?

Ford struggled a little, dropping the rope and pushing his hands against the couch to try and stand back up. He felt Xin's legs tighten around his waist. "Xin, let go, I can't pull on you when I'm on top of you."

"Never!" Xin laughed as he placed his bound hands behind Ford's head, entrapping his head within the loop of his arms. "Now who's got no leverage?" He grinned up at Ford, their faces inches apart. Ford was starting to feel his back ache in this bent over position. "Well you forgot to take one thing into account!" Ford smirked.

"What?" Xin asked.

"My arms!" Ford pushed himself back and up with his arms, Xin crying out as he was lifted off the couch, his arms still behind Ford's head while his legs tightened around Ford's waist, holding the man upright so he wouldn't slide down Ford's chest. Xin growled as Ford stood up. "That's cheating." The dragon declared. Ford placed his hands on his hips. "Since you're hanging off me, that means I'm still pulling on you. Therefore I win!"

"No you don't!" Xin pouted as he pulled on his hands, dragging Ford's head and neck forward to press their foreheads together. You might be standing, but I've still got you surrounded."

"I don't think that was in our rules." Ford raised an eyebrow. "Rules shmules~all that's important is that I'm winning!" Xin cheered. Ford rolled his eyes. He grabbed the long end of the rope again. "Well, let's see who's winning when I do THIS!" He threw a bunch of the other end of the rope into the air where it looped around a beam on the low ceiling. He saw Xin's eyes go wide and smirked before pulling at the end of the rope, dragging Xin's hands up into the air and away from Ford's head.

Xin struggled with his arms up in the air, unable to pull them down and with his legs around Ford's waist the only thing keeping him from falling. "Augh! No fair!" He whined as he wiggled back and forth. Ford laughed as he pulled harder, trying to lift Xin into the air, it was pretty difficult, the rope was merely around the top of the beam, there was no pulley or other device to make it easier so Ford had to pull against Xin's weight and gravity to try and lift him.

"Whoa! whoa!" Xin cried as he was slowly pulled away from Ford. "Hey! No fair!" He tried to keep his grip on Ford's waist with his legs but his arms were pulled taut and if he didn't let go it might start to hurt...but letting go would put all his weight on his arms, which would also hurt…

It was also starting to feel pretty good.

"C-cheater!" Xin panted as his arms began to ache. Ford's shit eating grin make him growl and he unwrapped one leg so he could lightly kick him in the side. "Quit smiling like y-you...oooh…." Xin moaned before he could finished his scolding when Ford tugged on the rope and make him bounce in the air. "Ah...ffffuck…." He whined, as his spine popped. "Oh...that...that's pretty good…" he moaned. Xin's legs relaxed and he slid away from Ford to dangle in the air by his arms. his toes barely touched the ground and he whined. "Stupid leverage!" He grumbled as he tugged ineffectively at the rope. Ford chuckled. "So, are you enjoying yourself?"

"I would enjoy it more if you didn't look so smug." Xin pouted. Ford was going to respond but a man in a lab coat walked into the room, took one look at them and turned around on his heel to leave. Ford and Xin stared at the man's retreating back. "Who's that?" Xin asked.

"That's Dr. Jerald, he's a mechatronics engineer, currently he's working on soundwave applications with moving speakers." Ford explained. Xin hummed, moving a little to try and rotate his shoulders into a more comfortable position. "I'd like to meet your co-workers sometime."

"Oh, I'm sure they'd love to meet you too." Ford smiled at the thought. With Xin's brilliant mind contributing, he was sure everyone's projects would progress much faster. Speaking of which. "Hey Xin, so...you're ok with helping me with my projects right?"

"Yeah? I already s-said that's fine…" Xin panted as he purposely moved so that the rope would pull him in a way that stretched his side, ooh~ that felt nice…

"Well, would you be averse to helping the others?"

"No-not particularly...shit, can you lower me a little so I can get this stretch?" Xin swung around a little by lifting his legs off the ground deliberately. Ford allowed the rope to drop a few inches and Xin planted his legs on the ground in a wide stance and leaned forward, his arms pulled behind him and his spine made a few more popping sounds. "Fuck yesss~"

"You really like stretching huh?" Ford noted. Xin nodded with a content expression. "The problem with taking a form that has bones and muscles, they get all stiff and sore. I have to stretch constantly just to work out all the kinks." He rotated his shoulders and arched his neck to the side, producing another pop. "But a lot of stretches are hard to do on my own, I need something pulling me to get far enough." and even as a triangle he just started… Aching, from having to hold in all his energy all the time. But stretching, even if it didn't release that energy, still released tension somewhat, like his physical body tricking his mind into thinking he had eased the pressure.

"I never thought of it like that." Ford nodded. "I have found my back hurts after being bent over my lab desk all day. A good stretch really does do wonders." Xin moaned as he shook himself. "For me, I tend to fall asleep curled up or on my side and it's terrible for my spine."

"Is that why there are so many kinks in it?" Ford frowned. "I wasn't aware even all powerful demons had to deal with the mundane pains of bad sleeping posture."

"It only happens when I do so in the form of something with a skeletal structure." Xin admitted. "But as much as it sucks, the feeling of my bones popping is...wonderful~" he purred. Ford looked like he wanted to pull out a journal and write more notes down. "Fascinating. Also, there was something I was curious about...I'm not sure if you would be comfortable with it though."

"What?" Xin asked, his eyes half lidded as he twisted himself again, it ached so good~

"I would like to study your triangle form as well." Ford admitted. Xin froze and looked up at the scientist. "My...real form?" He asked slowly. Ford nodded. "As interesting as it has been to see how your constructed body's nerves match up to a human's, I am incredibly curious as to the anatomy of a Triangle."

"Well I'm telling you straight out, my anatomy is different from both your Bill Cipher and Seb's past self."

"How so? Are you not the same species?" Ford blinked. Xin shook his head. "I've compared notes with Seb before. Our homeworld's are...different. In my world, all people are Shapes and your sex is determined by your genitals, much like humans I guess? But in Seb's past life, only males were Shapes. All women were Lines."

"...I would have loved to study that as well…" Ford frowned. How did reproduction even work with a species like that? Xin panted as Ford's distraction made him release his hold on the rope and the man dropped to his knees, his arms finally allowed to come back down. Xin wobbled over to the couch and laid down "Shit...that was kind of nice...not what I was expecting but...nice…"

"Oh, is this session done?" Ford blinked, finally back to the present. Xin nodded. Ford knelt down to untie his hands, noticing the painful looking abrasions on his wrists. He cursed. "Shoot! I'm sorry, I didn't realize it would be that tight…" Ford berated himself. He went too far. He gently touched the skin along Xin's wrists which were rubbed raw, a bruise already forming and some of the skin bleeding slightly.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt-"

"It's fine, Fordsie." Xin took back his freed hands and licked at the blood. "It's just a small abrasion. It'll heal by tomorrow."

"But you're bleeding…" Ford gently cradled Xin's hand. "I should bandage them." He picked Xin up, making the dragon yelp, and carried him back down the hallway. "I have a first aid kit in my lab."

"I told you I'm FINE Ford!" Xin whined. "It's barely a break of skin. I'll be healed soon! Don't waste your bandages on me!"

"But I want to help." The man replied as he carried the shorter man back to his workshop. A few scientists were whispering to each other and dramatically turned to look away and do literally anything else when they saw their boss carrying the man they saw him with earlier. "You owe me 10 dollars…" A woman whispered to her work partner.

"Ford, Stanford, I'm serious, let me go!" Xin pushed at the man's chest when Ford pushed the door to his workshop with his foot and closed it again with his hip. Ford wasn't going to drop the subject until he got him bandaged. He didn't want to leave Xin like that, it was going to bother him later. Xin pouted when it seemed Ford really wasn't going to stop and growled "Alright, plan B then." Ford cried out in surprise when Xin began to glow and his form shifted. Ford's eyes widened in horror when a bright yellow, glowing triangle appeared before him.

He knew this wasn't his Bill but in that moment his mind blanked with fear and he froze.

Bill shook himself to get used to being a triangle again and looked down at Ford. If he had a heart it would have broken at the expression of terror mixed with unconscious hate on his face. Bill flinched back and shrank down to barely a foot long as he tried as hard as he could to not hold it against Ford. It's not his fault he got fucked over by the Bill Cipher of this world. "...This was a bad idea…" Bill mumbled as he backed up. Ford blinked, his mild panic abating at the sad tone of Bill's voice. "Wait! No, I'm sorry! I just…" Ford sputtered. He reached out and took Bill's hand. "Don't go. I'm sorry, I was...surprised…"

Bill looked down at his hand, so small and cartoonish. His wrists were thinner than Ford's fingers like this. The contrast was striking and Bill wasn't sure how to feel about this. He tugged on his hand but Ford didn't let go. "Ford."

"Please don't go."

Bill looked up into Ford's face. He sighed. "You obviously haven't gotten over your Bill yet. I don't think it would be right for me to be around you in this form." Ford shook his head. "I'm fine. I swear, I was just surprised."

"Right." Bill said, not sounding like he believed him. "It's getting late anyway, I should head back…"

"Please stay."

"Ford." Bill sighed. "We can meet up tomorrow night if you want? I think I'm done for tonight." He pulled his hands out of Ford's grip, slipping partially into incorporeality to do so, and Blinked away into the Mindscape, his physical form turning into a shower of lights that quickly faded. Ford stood there with his hand out. Finally he sighed and dropped his arm back to his side. He berated himself again for being an idiot and upsetting Bill. "Why am I such a mess?" he groaned as he sat at his desk. He felt tired and disappointed with himself. So lost was he in his own head, Ford didn't notice all his assistants gathering in the hallways outside to discuss what Dr. Jerald said he saw in the breakroom.

After the mysterious explosion two weeks ago, this was the most interesting thing to have happened!

"I swear I saw that black-haired man tied up to the beam on the ceiling!" Jerald whisper-hissed.

"But what were they doing?" Dr. Wexler pressed.

"I-I didn't get to see very well, Dr. Pines was with his back turned to me, but-but-"

"But what, man?!" Dr. Clark shook him.

"I saw-I heard the other man...moaning…" Jay Jerald said with an embarrassed wince.

The other scientists gasped. "Really? Dr. Pines and...but…" Dr. Wexler blushed heavily. "H-he would never do s-something...like...like…" She covered her face, she had seen the attractive young man walk through the halls. He WAS quite effeminate...but...but…

"Why would they do that in the breakroom?! S-shouldn't they be going somewhere more...private?!" Dr. Poddar choked out.

"...maybe they wanted people to see?" One of them pointed out "Some people are really into that.

"Urgh! Guys, I can't get this out of my head!" Jerald cried in horror as he covered his face with his hands. He had frozen when he saw...the pleased expression on that man's face and the sounds (oh lord, those moans) as he was tied up!

"But...they had clothes on, right?" One of them asked shyly.

Dr. Jerald nodded. Thank Tesla they still had clothes on!

"Maybe...Dr. Pines was...trying something out?" Another woman (not a scientist, one of the receptionists) suggested. "You know...I never thought of him like...you know…" She trailed off. "The kind of man who would do that in the middle of the break room."

"Like what? Are you seriously trying to say Dr. Pines was...what? Conducting some sort of stress test? An experiment with how much weight a person can carry on their arms?!" A man pulled on his hair. "Even if that were true, why was he experimenting with an incredibly attractive, provocatively dressed man?!"

"Ok, I don't know! I'm just a receptionist, alright?!" The woman groaned. The coffee boy (the newest intern) approached them excitedly, wanting to know what they were talking about, and the scientists grinned among themselves.

"Want to help us solve a hypothesis, kid?" Dr. Wexler, smiled at him sweetly.

"Y-Yes! I'd love to!" He lit up at the chance to actually help out with some SCIENCE for once. Jack Goodman had taken the internship because he wanted a look at all the cool gadgets they were building here but for the most part his job just consisted of bringing people coffee, LOTS of coffee. Only Dr. Pines actually let him help with science stuff. But that was mostly taking notes and checking over the readouts. He DID get to build his own mini-robot, which was cool.

Dr. Wexler pointed at the door to Ford's lab. "Can you go ask Dr. Pines who that man he brought with him is?" Jack paled. Going near Dr. Pines?! And into his office?! At this hour? The doc was very particular with when people were allowed in.

"10 bucks that's his boyfriend!" Dr. Clark, bet suddenly.

"10 bucks that's a hired 'dancer'." Dr. Poddar, suggested with a waggle of his eyebrows.

"10 bucks this is all a misunderstanding." Dr. Wexler deadpanned, being the only sound mind here.

Dr. Jerald shook his head. "I am not participating in this." He didn't want to know what it was, he just wanted to get back to his science. His nice, simple science involving using sound-waves to blast buildings apart from a speaker mounted robot. (Okay, maybe he and Dr. McGucket were having too much fun with this joint collaboration of theirs…)

Dr. Poddar nudged the young man in the direction of Ford's workshop and the poor kid looked at the scientists who all gave him a thumbs up before hiding to spy on them. Jack sighed. He should have studied Law like his Dad wanted, but no! He wanted SCIENCE and now he had to face the scariest and most mysterious man on Earth to ask about about his romantic life or something! He gently knocked on the closed door and leaned in to listen. "He-Hello? Dr. Pines?" There was no response. He looked back at the other scientists, hidden badly behind some potted plants and chairs. They all waved at him with a 'Go on.' hand gesture. Jack whimpered. "Dr. Pines? I'm coming in now…"

He opened the door warily, the last time someone at the lab had opened Dr. Pines' door without asking first had gotten a face full of a one eyed tentacle creature. The poor scientist, it was Dr. Poddar, had a swollen face for a whole week afterward. The intern braced himself for any explosions or monsters but nothing happened so he opened his eyes and saw Dr. Pines slumped over his desk. "Dr. Pines?!" The man stirred and turned to face Jack, who was shocked to see the incredibly sad expression on it. "Dr. Pines are you alright?"

"No...I'm...I'm afraid I did something incredibly stupid."

"Y-you, sir? But...you're a genius." Jack stuttered. Ford sighed and slumped over his desk again. "I have been told by my brothers many times, that I am the worst when it comes to social interaction." He admitted. Jack nodded slowly, yes, Dr. Pines was too intimidating for most people to talk to. "What happened sir?"

"A...friend, showed me their true self and I reacted badly. Now I'm afraid they won't want to be around me anymore." He sighed. "It wasn't entirely my fault! He looked so much like… someone I once knew, I found myself reacting without thinking and I hurt his feelings…"

Jack furrowed his brow in confusion. That...sounded almost like…

"Well...have you apologized?" Jack suggested. Dr. Pines nodded. "I did but he left anyway. He said he was done for tonight, even though I asked him to stay…"

"W-well he said he's done for tonight? He didn't say he was done for good right? Which means he might be willing to come back another time?" Jack tried to cheer him up. It seemed to work as Dr. Pines perked up. "Yeah. You know, I'll call him tomorrow. Apologize properly." The scientist got up to pat Jack on the back. "Thank you Mr. Gooseman. I will plan out my apology speech right now!" Jack twitched a little. "It's Goodman, sir…." Ford nodded absently, already turning to pull out a notebook to begin drafting out an apology.

Jack sighed, understood the dismissal and quickly left the room. As soon as the door closed he was beset by the other scientists. "Well? What's the sitch?" Dr. Clark asked.

"Um...from what I can understand, h-he said…" Jack blushed. Dr. Pines said that whoever the other man was, he showed Dr. Pines his 'true self' and Dr. Pines had reacted badly. The only thing Jack could think that meant was..."-that the other guy might have been...trying to…" Jack whispered "...take his clothes off...and Dr. Pines apparently reacted badly to what he saw…" Jack thought of what else their boss had said and tried to put it in words he understood. "...and that the other guy had reminded Dr. Pines of...I think, his Ex, and Dr. Pines had reacted really badly and hurt the other man's feelings. So...he left and now Dr. Pines is planning out an apology letter."

Everyone gasped at Jack's explanation. Eventually Dr. Clark smiled. "You all owe me 10!" Dr. Wexler crossed her arms over her chest. "I don't owe you anything, I need evidence. Did he explicitly said he was his boyfriend?"

Jack hummed and looked down. "N-No...that's just how I interpreted it...he-he said 'showed him his true self' and that he reminded him of someone he once knew." He made quotes with his hands. "I-I'm not sure what else that could mean…"

"So you won't pay me?" Clark asked disappointed.

"He-he's going to call him tomorrow...so maybe we-we could...eavesdrop?"

The scientists seemed to consider it and finally agreed. Yes. That sounded better. They wanted to know for sure what their boss was doing with that handsome man. If Ford knew what his staff were planning he'd probably fire the lot of them. Unaware of their gossiping schemes, Ford was crumpling up another another apology note.

Bill flew through the Mindscape holding back tears. He knew Ford didn't mean it but it was still...rude. "He's the one who WANTED to see my Triangle form anyway!" He muttered. "Stupid Ford." He sighed. Settling down on a random rooftop, he lifted up his hands. He was in the Mindscape, his physical body dispersed, therefore the wounds on his wrists were no longer here. Even so, he remembered them.

They ached faintly. It felt quite nice.

Bill sighed and pressed his hands to his eyelid. "I really am Bill Cipher aren't I?" He groaned and flopped onto his back. Maybe he shouldn't do this anymore. Becoming more like Bill...he didn't really want that. But sometimes he would forget. He would forget that being like Bill was something to be avoided. He would forget WHAT was a 'Bill Trait' or...whatever? At which point did Bill begin and Zyun-Jan end? Or the other way around?

He...she, didn't like pain. She hated it.

Screaming. Crying. Frustration. Self hate. A thick school textbook slammed down onto her hand repeatedly. Punishment. The pain was punishment. Because she wasn't good enough. Because she wasn't GOOD. The crunch of a bone. A textbook falling from a shaking hand. A bruised hand cradled close. This was a punishment. It hurts because it's a punishment. It hurts because that's what she deserved.

Bill shook his head. No. Zyun-Jan hated pain. He rolled onto his side and sighed. It's not like he forgot on purpose. There were just so many more things to think about. His life as Bill, his Friends, his children…

Bill allowed the tears to build up and leak. Crying is a good thing. Yes? Maybe if he cried enough it wouldn't hurt anymore. He missed Quackers. He missed Pynelope. He missed Pyrone. He wouldn't have had to go through this alone. Xanthar would have comforted him. Ammy would have- Pyronica would have- everyone would have-

But what did he do?

Ran away like a coward.

Ran away to live inside someone else's happily ever after.

Bill groaned. He shouldn't have come here. He should go home.

Zach and Zoe pulled at his hands chanting "Story! Story!" With those wide, innocent smiles.

Shit. Bill laughed bitterly. He ran away to try and get over the deaths of his children only to get himself attached to MORE children. "Fuck my life…" He laughed. He laid there and thought. What was he going to do? Who was he going to be?

Seb had found his happy ending. A man who reincarnated and suffered and eventually found happiness. Could Bill be like that too? How? What did he have to do to get his own happy ending? Maybe he should ignore his own Pines family altogether. Stay in space with his Friends and spend each day searching for things to do.

Spend the rest of existence trying to fill his time with stuff. Entertainment, food, games, parties...maybe go out and help some people in trouble. Get shunned for doing do. Get mad. Kill a few people. Feel bad for it. Cry. Rely on others' pity to get by.

"I am fucking PATHETIC."

When did he become such an awful person? Bill couldn't remember. He was so broken. He knew there was something wrong but he couldn't really tell what it was anymore. There should be a solution, a correct path forward, but for the life of him, he couldn't think of it. He felt like he knew the answer. It was on the tip of his tongue but he couldn't put it in words. Couldn't even conceptually realize what it was.

Sometimes he had moments of clarity, when he understood what was wrong, understood how to be better. But then that moment was gone and he just wanted to have fun to distract himself from the horrifying existential thoughts of what living for eternity really meant. The Earth would die, humanity would go extinct, the universe would end. And Bill Cipher would still be here.

Mortality was a terminal disease and everyone had it but him and those few who were tricked into staying with him forever and ever. In those moments of clarity, Bill was at peace with mortals being mortals. They were at peace, they had found rest. They didn't have to suffer or struggle anymore. The only one suffering was him.

The dead do not mourn.

Bill hated his wildly oscillating thought process sometimes. How had he gone from Ford hurting his feelings to philosophical thoughts on the nature of death and mourning? Bill wanted to do what he always did, set these thoughts and feelings aside so he could just be happy. He wasn't...ignoring those feelings, just pushing them away to experience later. But there was so much backlog. It builds and builds until a single event triggers the landslide of everything hitting at once.

Maybe he should just let this happen, ride out the emotional horse tornado around and around and around until everything is spinning and he didn't know his lefts from his wrongs. Bill got up slowly and tried to make his way to Seb's house. His thoughts were quickly spiralling out of control. Topics popping in and out as they scream and shout. All the things he could do. All the things he could see.

Would you? Could you? Here or there?

Would you? Could you? Anywhere!

"This is why I HATE letting my mind drift!" Bill screamed in frustration. He had to get his own mind back under control. He couldn't focus, couldn't think. Think, think, blink, ink, sink, shrink…see?! This is what happens if he didn't have something specific to think about! Everything gets thought at once. Every fear and insecurity, should he run or should he let things be?

His ups were his downs. He breathes while he drowns. Everything was here. So put them over there. But there was here and here was nowhere!

Bill couldn't remember how he made it back to Seb's house but he did. He stumbled through the walls until he reached Seb's room. He and Wanda were already asleep. Bill shifted into Miz, sighing in relief as some of the torrent of thoughts, emotions, sounds and images were...not gone per say, but muted. She crawled into bed, exhausted and dizzy and distressed. Sleep sounded good right now.

Sleep to let her mind sort out what the fuck it wanted. Sleep so she could let go of caring, thinking, existing in a state that required actual thought and care and attention and fuck, she didn't care anymore. She just wanted this all to stop.

Miz curled up on the bed and let the dizziness inside her mind spiral her thoughts around and around until she finally fell asleep.

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