Hello! It is I, bringing you a new funny chapter! Drawing in deviantart!
When Wanda woke up early in the morning, she found herself sandwiched between her husband and a little dark-haired girl. She tried to stand up, but Seb had one leg over her and he was hugging her waist. "Seb...Sebas…"
"Um…" Seb muttered and snuggled closer to her back. "Let me go, I have to get ready for work…" She groaned a bit and pulled away. The man moaned sad. "Warm...hug…"
Wanda slowly stood up and pushed Miz closer to Seb. "Here. Hug Miz instead…" She giggled when Seb caught the girl and curled up around her. As much as a part of her told her she should feel jealous, her rational part didn't allow her to feel that way. Miz was Seb's sister! The blonde gave her husband a kiss on his cheek. "See you at night…Take care of our babies...I think they have an appointment with their pediatrician for another vaccine today, please, check it out."
"Ok…"
With that, the woman quickly took a shower, changed, kissed her sleeping babies goodbye and left, she would buy breakfast when she was close to the office.
The real alarm to wake up in the household rang around an hour and a half later and Seb blinked in confusion when he saw he was holding Miz. "Hey…" He ran a hand through her hair. "Good morning…"
"Uwu…" She hugged her pillow and Seb laughed. "I'll go wake up the twins for daycare…" He let go of the demon girl and yawned as he started his daily routine. First he took a shower and changed his clothes, he shaved the parts he didn't want for the beard he was growing and combed his hair a bit as well. Then he went to the twins' room to get them out of bed, get them changed, feed them, see that their hair was combed and their teeth washed, that their little backpacks had all they needed for the day, before taking them to preschool. What did Wanda tell him? Doctor appointment? Oh dear Ax, the twins were going to throw a tantrum today...
While the three had breakfast, and Sir Bedazzle rolled in his bin full of water, Miz came downstairs.
"Hi, Miz!" Zoe and Zach waved, happy and innocently eager to start a new day. Miz smiled faintly at them. "Hey little gremlins…" she rubbed her eyes and yawned. She felt a little unhappy but couldn't remember why. Must not be important. She pushed the feeling behind her and climbed into a chair to grab some food as well. "So, back to the usual day?" She asked as she nibbled on some toast. Seb nodded, "The twins have a doctor's appointment after school." He leaned in and whispered to her. "Should I tell them now so they can burn our house and NOT the hospital?"
Miz turned to the kids. "Oi! Prepare yourselves, this afternoon you shall face a harrowing quest!" the twins stared at her with wide eyes. "What quest? Will we fight a dragon?" Zoe gasped as she stood up in her chair. "Will we fight you?" Zach asked, bouncing in his seat. "You shall be facing the most dreaded beast of all! Doctors !" Miz cried dramatically. The twins both gasped. "Nooo!" Seb sipped his orange juice, amused. The twins stood up and pulled their dad's arms. "Noo!" They screamed again, louder this time.
"Dad, no! I don't want to go!" Zoe pleaded. "It hurts!"
"I hate it! I hate it!" Zach hugged himself. He hated seeing needles and the liquid they put inside. It was scary and he didn't like it.
"No one likes doctors, but I don't want you catching anything that can hurt you, especially now with idiots not wanting to vaccinate their children." Seb sighed. Seriously, humans were weak as fuck, and vaccines were invented for a reason. "But I don't like needles!" Zoe whined and her hands started burning, itching to release her flames. "I will bite the nurse if we go!" She threatened. "If you bite the nurse, I will bite YOU and you will be grounded." Seb smiled. "If you two behave, we can buy ice cream later, but ONLY if you two behave at the doctors. And school. Deal?"
The twins shared a look and sighed. There goes their plan to take revenge on that kid who broke Zoe's color pencil. "Deal." They nodded warily, but didn't shake hands with their Dad. It was dangerous to negotiate with something like the doctor, Dad could find a loophole and make them regret it later. "But we still don't like it." Zach shook his head. Miz giggled. She loved these humans so much...
"I hate needles too. I used to cry when I had to go to the doctors." She admitted. The twins turned to her in surprise. "Really?" Zach asked. Miz nodded. "But I got over it. Because I'm stronger than my fear! If it's scary I just have to look away from the needle and think about something else. Besides, the doctors are just trying to help. You don't want to get sick right?"
They shook their heads. Zoe had gotten a cold once and she hated it. And Zully didn't like being sick either.
Seb grinned and attacked the twins with kisses as rubbed his beard on their soft, chubby faces. "I don't want you getting sick either my small, baby monsters!"
"GAH! Dad!" Zoe whined, pushing his face away from her. "Shave!" She shouted as Seb simply laughed. "Nope. I like my beard, kid. Makes me look special and cool." The twins rolled their eyes. Daddy was silly. His beard was itchy but he kept it anyway. They turned to Miz for help. "Shave?" They asked. Miz cackled and held up an electric razor "Well…"
"No!" Seb covered his face and ran away, just when Miz stood up. "Oh come here, Sebas…" She sing-songed. "I just wanna talk~" She walked towards the bathroom where the man had locked himself in, thinking it would protect him. How cute.
"Shave Daddy!" Zoe cheered and Miz grinned. She simply phased through the closed door and the twins laughed when they heard their dad screaming in surprise. Inside, Miz was holding Sebas down and trying to apply shaving cream to his face. "Now I'm just gonna admit I've never done this before~so I have ABSOLUTELY no idea what I'm doing!" Miz laughed maniacally. Seb screamed. "You're not even supposed to use cream with an electric razor!" He wailed. The razor buzzed. Miz was merciless. There was a silence. The twins outside held each other as they strained to hear. Finally the door creaked open slowly. "D-daddy?" Zoe whispered.
A heavenly chorus sang out "Ahhh~" as bright light shone from within the bathroom. Seb stepped out, his face smooth and shiny, his hair perfectly combed and a large pout on his lips. Miz stood behind him, holding the light effects and trying hard not to laugh. She didn't succeed. "PFTH! AHAHAHAHAHA!"
The twins stared in shock at the man who MUST be their dad but he looked so...naked without his beard. It made him seem much younger and they were amazed at how different it looked. "Whoa…" Zoe whispered. "Daddy is pretty."
"I'm ALWAYS pretty!" Seb complained as he rubbed a hand on his smooth chin. Eh, it'll grow back in a week right? Damn body hair grew fast, but at least his beard was included in that growth. "I can't believe you shaved off my beard…" He grumbled at Miz who looked entirely too smug. "It looks better this way." She insisted.
"But I liked it!" Seb complained with a groan. "And Wanda liked it!"
The twins looked away, and attempted to whistle. Suuuure. Mommy liked it.
Seb didn't notice the looks on his kids' faces and looked at them. "Alright, it's getting late. Go grab your backpacks, little traitors." The twins laughed and went to their room. Seb went to grab their lunchboxes and moodily tossed them onto the couch.
"You really look better this way...I said you were the most handsome, didn't it? I know what I'm talking about." Miz smiled up at the man. "Stick with this, or a goatee. That looked hella good on you."
"Ok, alright, I get it, thank you I guess…" Seb smiled and ruffled her hair.
"We're ready!" The twins came running down the stairs. Seb grinned "Alright kids, first one to the car gets to choose the radio station!" The twins gasped and raced off (pulling on their velcro shoes), pushing each other to try and get ahead. Seb got his keys and slipped his outdoor shoes on. Miz, as per usual, stayed behind to look after the house. Seb had asked her once if she wanted to come with them to school but she had shook her head. "Too many questions if I show up. Frankly I'm amazed the neighbors haven't asked about why there's a random girl living with you."
Seb waved goodbye to Miz as he opened the car door for the twins to climb in, sitting down in their safety seats and waiting to be buckled in. "I'll be back soon." He called over his shoulder. Miz nodded. "I'll clean up the kitchen."
"You're an Ax-sent gift, Miz!" Sebastian laughed as he finished tending to the kids and drove off. The twins waved at Miz as they lost sight of the house. "How come Miz doesn't have to go to school?" Zach asked innocently. Seb grinned. How cute. They were so naive! "Because Miz isn't really a kid. She already went through school, but likes to look like a little girl."
"She went to a dragon school?" Zoe asked with her green and brown eyes wide. "Eh...yes. Definitely dragon school… and probably a triangle school?" Seb nodded without looking away from the road. "I want to go to dragon school!" Zoe exclaimed after a few moments of quiet. "When you become a dragon, I will send you to dragon school." Seb humored her. Zoe growled. "I'm a dragon now! Rawr!" her hands caught on fire. Zach tensed up. "Zoe! Dad is driving! Don't scare him now!" Seb checked around to see if there were any cars on the road too and grinned. He faked a startled cry and sped up a little, making the twins shriek. "A dragon is going to attack me!"
"Wait! Wait! I'm not a dragon anymore!" Zoe explained quickly and Seb stopped the car a bit harder than necessary. The twins laughed when their bodies jerked forward. Seb looked at the backseat. "Are you sure you won't turn into a dragon and attack me?" He pouted. "I won't! I promise!" The girl put a hand over her chest solemnly. "I will use my dragon form to attack dumb kids who bother me." Zach laughed. "But what if a knight appears?" Zoe stuck her tongue out "If you're the knight then you can defend the dragon!"
"Good girl." Seb grinned and turned on the car again. They finally reached the cute, colorful building of their preschool and the twins struggled to get free. They wanted to go! Their Daddy kindly unbuckled them from their seats and they jumped out of the car, running happily inside. "Hi, kids!" one of their teachers greeted. She was at the gate, checking to make sure everyone was arriving and in case anyone strange was loitering outside the daycare.
"Hi, Miss Blossom!" They waved at her as they ran inside to their classroom.
Seb watched them run inside and sighed. He handed the young woman with a blue apron at the entrance their lunchboxes. "They forgot this…" Miss Blossom blinked in surprise at the Pines twins' father. "Oh. You shaved, Mr. Pines?" He blushed. "Eh, Zoe got annoyed at my beard scratching her and demanded me to shave." He sighed. "My poor beard...it was innocent!"
Miss Blossom laughed, taking the lunch boxes. "Well it's a good look for you." Sebastian gasped. "Not you too!" The daycare worker laughed and walked back inside to put the boxes away. Seb rolled his eyes, they were wrong, his beard was awesome!
The man returned to his car, argued with another parent who was scolding him for parking like that, and went back home. He had to finish that drawing and try out that new program he had been recommended to design things digitally. Modern times made everything about computers! It wasn't long before he was home and found Miz doing the laundry. Seriously, best roommate ever. He gave her a wave before going to his 'office' to work. That was how the past few weeks had been. Quiet normalcy as he lived his life peacefully with his family and (spiritual) little sister.
Not for the first time, Seb wondered how long Miz was planning to stay. He now knew that she was hiding out at his place because she didn't want to go home and confront the fact that her children had died (which, he sort of understood) but now that the knowledge had come to light, did she still have a reason to stay?
Did Seb WANT her to stay?
If he was being honest, yes. He wanted her to stay. She was like a little sister and the children loved her. But...didn't she have her own life back in the other dimension? Her own friends and family who might be missing her? He knew that time didn't pass in another dimension unless it was observed and all that, but still . He didn't want to make Miz stay if there was something important she had to do back there.
It wouldn't be right to keep her here, selfishly, if her own family and friends were waiting for her. He looked down at his finished drawing which seriously needed to be sent to the company because his manager was going nuts, and sighed. Should he tell her about this? If he asked her how much longer she would stay he was almost totally sure the girl was going to get offended and sad. He knew because he knew Miz, she'd think he was kicking her out and that was the last thing Sebastian wanted to do...
A small part of him wanted her to stay forever. He loved being with her, she helped him with the house and with the twins, something he had to do alone before and he was incredibly grateful for it...
If she didn't have any hurry to leave, if she didn't want to leave...then why should he worry...right? If Miz liked being with them, if the kids liked her and Wanda had no problem with her presence, Wanda even told him she saw Miz as a daughter! (His wife was so cute, what the hell?!), who was he to tell her to go to a place she didn't want to confront? Seb smiled happily as he attached the drawing to his manager's email. Yeah. He was right. Miz could stay as long as she wanted because he wanted her to stay. It was a win-win!
In the other room, Miz was humming to herself as she worked. Chores were so much easier with powers. She floated the laundry bin, which was pretty heavy, what with 4 people's worth of clothes in it, down to the basement and sorted them by colors. Wash the lights first, the delicates and lights go together. She tried hard not to feel creeped out. Basements were just...creepy. Maybe if it wasn't so...barren? Miz waved her hands and created more lights, flooding the cold basement with a warmer, yellow glow as she colored the walls pastel pink with flowers and made the ground a pretty grass green.
Much better!
She scooped in the detergent soap and turned the washing machine on. While the wash ran, she could go back upstairs and prepare lunch for Seb later. Plus, there was still the mess in the backyard from the party that needed to be cleaned up. It was all very domestic and calming. Miz wondered if maybe she should get a real job as a maid. It was something she enjoyed, so maybe she should go for it? How WOULD the multiverse feel about Bill Cipher putting himself up for hire as a maid service?
The idea made her laugh until she was gasping for air. Once the hilarity of the look on Time Baby's face went away, Miz quieted and frowned. She missed home (As afraid as she was to go back). But she also wanted to stay with Seb. Maybe she could do both? The Void of Doors was her true Dreamscape after all. So maybe she could go home and just...visit Seb in her dreams whenever she was asleep? If the only place she was going was to Seb's dimension, she wouldn't have to worry too much about the required safety features she had to manually set up every time she came through the Doors. And she could see if it was safe to go back to Blue's place...
It would be nice if she could have both. She was greedy like that. If there was a choice for one or the other that she wanted, she would take both and nuts to anyone who tried to stop her. She would need to head back home in order to set this system up though, a true, solid link between her Exit Door and Seb's. She would need his permission to mess around his Mindscape for that.
She went back upstairs, lazily waving her hands to gather up the trash in the yard for recycling, and knocked on Seb's door.
"Come in!" Seb shouted from the inside and Miz did so. "Hey Seb?" she began. "Would it be okay if I linked my Dreamscape with yours so I could travel back and forth between my dimension and this one without having to go through the exit doors within my Dreamscape each time?"
"...Uh?" The man looked up at her confused. "You-You want to link your Dreamscape with mine…"
Miz nodded excitedly. "Can I?" "Eh…" Seb grimaced and scratched his head. "I don't know. It doesn't sound safe."
Miz thought about how she could make it seem like a good idea."You can even come to MY side and meet my family?" Miz pointed out. "I'm sure 8-Ball would love to see Stanley again too, they seemed to get along back when he stayed with me." Now, that sounded more interesting. "Really? That…" That sounded awesome. His brothers got to meet his friend's family, it was only fair if he could too! "This link...It would only take you here in your spirit form...and me to your world in my spirit form, wouldn't it?"
Miz nodded. "I came here in spirit form and built a body, I can do the same for you and anyone else who wants to come over."
"So if they wanted to, the twins or-or Wanda could go too? But are you sure nothing can get from your world to mine if we do this?"
Miz scoffed. "The only way that would happen is if someone could break into my Mindscape! And I've been working on adding protections! There are multiple runes and security features everywhere! You won't be in any danger!" She insisted.
The brunet man bit his lip in thought. This was Miz they were talking about. She was his friend. She wouldn't let anything bad happen if he accepted...but one Bill Cipher got into his mind already and his mind had to be destroyed in order to defeat him… He was not afraid of Miz, he was worried something could happen to his mind. What if somehow, Miz's presence did something to his mind accidentally? What if he went insane?
"What...why are you asking this anyway?" He asked instead with a sheepish smile. "You...planning to leave already?" He asked softly. She shook her head. "I just...wanted a way to be with both my family AND yours." She tried to figure out how to explain this "I can manually travel back and forth but it's dangerous to have to open my Exit door so often. Even with my security features, I don't want to risk it. But if I directly link us up, I can come to you freely without having to risk the Void, or have my own Door open." Though, she would still check the Void now and then, to move Doors around and finalize the protective cage of Doors surrounding hers, Seb's and Blue's Doors.
Seb bit his finger as he thought. "Can you promise me your presence won't, won't damage my mind? It's been stable for years after-" He lifted his eyepatch to show her his lack of eye. "-You won't accidentally make something go too crazy...right?"
Miz placed a hand over her heart. "I promise I won't touch anything. I'm just going to put a door in an out of way place, away from any of your stuff. I'll mark it so it's clearly visible and different from any part of your mind."
Seb took a deep breath. Ok...he-he thought he got it. Miz wouldn't let anything happen. "Ok…" He nodded. "I accept." He held out his hand and Miz held out her own, blue flames danced along both hands. "So it's a Deal, your dimensional door will link directly with my Mindscape and mine with yours." Miz stated clearly, just to let Seb back out if he really wanted to. The man hesitated before smiling and shaking her hand, "Deal."
The flames flickered up their arms and both of them had a moment of vertigo. Miz whimpered as she shook her head. "Ugh...that felt weird." Seb groaned and massaged his temples. "Urgh, tell me about it…" He looked at his body for any change but of course found nothing. "So...It's done, right?" Miz scanned the human's mind and grinned when she felt the Door, clearly visible and different from anything in his space-like dreamscape. "Yup!"
Seb laughed nervously and sat down again. He was so paranoid, thinking Miz would make a deal to hurt him… "What-What are you doing now?" Miz laid down on a couch in Seb's office. "I need to see if it works." She admitted. She closed her eyes and appeared to go to sleep. "Eh...ok?" Seb raised an eyebrow, wondering if she left and left the body just to piss him off. When Miz's body continued to 'sleep', Seb decided to go back to work and not worry about it.
The world was a pale pink. Miz, Bill now, blinked slowly. His bricks pulsed lightly with a healthy golden glow as he looked around. Wait, this was the Space between Spaces! Oh… oh right, the AXOLOTL of this dimension probably Felt her making that connection and now…
...now he was probably going to have some words with him. Bill sighed. Right, should have figured this would happen. For a second, Bill worried about whether this Axolotl was going to be terrifying like the one he met in Blue's dimensional set, but then he relaxed. This Ax should be nicer. He was kind enough to allow Seb to come back to life, so that he could be with his family after all. This in mind, Bill held back his fear and decided to greet the salamander with an open mind.
"Hello?" there was no response. "Hewwo~?" He tried instead. "Hewwo~? Is anywun dewre~?"
"If you're attempting to do one of those 'meme' things, please stop."
He turned to see a large pale pinkish salamander giving him a deadpan stare. Bill giggled. "You know memes? My Ax doesn't."
"Your dimension doesn't yet have human internet." The Axolotl responded with a sigh. "It floods through all of the multiverse, spreading like a virus until even some of the Time Police dab while arresting people." he grimaced, "Please don't let my counterpart have to go through this too."
Bill responded with a cheeky grin "I make no promises~" So the humans in THIS dimension have spread their memes even into space? Nice~
The Axolotl sighed. "What are you doing here, Bill Cipher?"
"Well, technically, I think YOU pulled me here while I was attempting to get into my Dreamscape to see if the Doors I just built were working properly, but so long as I'm here, I might as well introduce myself! I'm Sebas' friend!" MizBill smiled proudly. "You know, he was a Bill, crazy guy, wanted to kill the Pines once upon a time..."
"I am aware who Sebastian Pines is, I created him and I have watched over him for years...still do."
MizBill hummed with curiosity. "Can...can I curl up with you? My Ax lets me do it…" He mumbled shyly (having fortified himself the instant he realized where he was, so it should be safe, and he would get a basic read on this AXOLOTL) and the giant salamander managed a small smile. " Very well, if you wish."
MizBill happily floated towards the Axolotl and curled up against his side. Ah...soft and warm, just like he liked his Axs… nothing at ALL like Blue's Ax… "Are you the same Ax from Sebas' previous life?" MizBill asked curiously (was pretty sure he was, but he might as well get confirmation), watching his mental form's own bricks glow yellow in the darkness of space. It was fascinating how this world can be entirely pink and white while still being dark.
"Indeed."
"But also from the triplets' dimension…"
"You are correct…I am the God for many dimensions, as are many other Axolotls...but I was not originally in touch with your Axolotl until recently, after you came here, the first time." The Axolotl blinked slowly down at MizBill. "You created the connection. You and he, are quite unique, from what little I can see."
"Eh, dad is dad...he helped me a lot when I first became immortal." MizBill shrugged. "Why didn't you help your Bills?" His tone wasn't accusatory, just, curious. "It just wasn't meant to be...my Bill Ciphers live out their lives, do what they choose and then perish at the hands of the Pines family where they would invoke my name for a chance at redemption." The Axolotl stared at Bill unblinkingly. "I do not interfere in what they choose to do."
"You can decide what Fate they have?" MizBill asked. "Like, Seb became...Seb, but in other fanfics I have read, Bill reincarnated as other people and in different situations."
"...I am not sure I understand what 'fanfic' you speak of, but yes, I decide which Fate they have after their deaths."
"What have you done to the Bill that THIS Pines family defeated?"
"It is a private Deal, Bill. I am not allowed to tell you."
"...reincarnated as a frog it is then." MizBill shrugged. "So...is it okay with you that I linked my mind with Seb's?"
The Axolotl smiled a little "Sebastian has completed his mission...I have guided him through the process, but now he can choose what to do on his own. I think he has learned everything needed to continue his life as a human in a responsible way."
"So...is that a yes?" the little triangle nuzzled with this Ax, does that make this one his uncle? His uncle Ax?
"Yes, as long as you don't risk his or his family's life, he has earned his peace, I wouldn't want it to be ruined… " Ax stroked MizBill's tiny triangular form with a paw. " Is this alright? I am used to dealing with less… polite Bill Ciphers." This Ax must be the most patient one, even more than Bill's own! Was that even possible?! MizBill giggled at the tickling sensation of the Axolotl's paw. "That's fine. So...does that make me the good child?" He batted his eyelashes innocently. Ax gave him a pat on the head and rolled his black eyes " I suppose you are."
"That's good to know." MizBill sighed and slumped over the Axolotl's hand. "...Is Time Baby gonna be pissed when he comes back?"
"He is always angry about one thing or another."
"You should try to raise him better." MizBill grumbled. "I know you're pretty hands off most of the time but still. You know he disintegrates his own workers just for the heck of it?" The Axolotl sighed. He couldn't take care of everything...
"I am glad you became Sebastian's friend...he didn't have it easy in this life either… " Ax ignored MizBill's glare. Oh, and whose' fault was that? "So I am glad you like him." MizBill scoffed. "You could try making more of an effort you know?" He poked the Axolotl's cheek "I shouldn't have to clean up other people's messes all the time, even if I like cleaning."
"I...admit I didn't think a few things through." The white salamander admitted with a sheepish voice. " He wasn't supposed to be treated that badly by his human father, but it was an unfortunate oversight… " The Axolotl sighed. "And the horrible pain he had to suffer from that zodiac on his back?" MizBill huffed. "I was containing his powers, pure energy, there was no way to make it painless, just progressive. It was meant to be gone when he reached Gravity Falls."
"And you couldn't have...oh, I don't know, told him to go to Gravity Falls after he was originally kicked out of his house?" MizBill asked sarcastically. There was a long silence before the Axolotl ducked his head, " I...didn't think of that…"
MizBill facepalmed. "You're an idiot. Oh my cheese, you're an idiot just like Seb and Ford!"
The Axolotl looked properly chastised. "Alright...I admit I was wrong...BUT! " He lifted a paw. " He wouldn't have grown as a person! " MizBill's glare stayed. " And he would have given his dark self his body once he HAD powers... that would have been worse." When MizBill's glare didn't waver, Ax mumbled " And he wouldn't have met Wanda again." MizBill blinked. "Ok, fine. I'll accept THAT as an excuse." He gently hit the Axolotl's paw. "Still, he suffered…"
Ax sighed again. "I know...but look what he has achieved, Sebastian... has his family back…" MizBill interjected "Which I helped with!" The Axolotl rolled his eyes. " He would have finished the portal on his own anyway, the boy is intelligent, he just doesn't believe it."
"Yeah, but I helped make sure the Stans survived their first tumble into the multiverse. Do you have ANY idea how many Fords actually didn't survive their first trip?" Miz knew this well after what had happened with Blue's dimensional sets. The Ax smiled sadly. "I know...But I knew they were going to be fine. I knew they would make it."
MizBill grumbled. "Well, your LITERAL Deus Ex Machina aside, what's going to happen to Seb now? He's...mortal…" The triangle looked down and the Axolotl gently stroked him. " He is human, Bill...I am sure you know what will eventually happen to him… " MizBill made a sniffing sound. " Bill...I understand it hurts...but Sebastian is happy right now… and you love him, think of him and enjoy your time with him now instead of dwelling on things that can't be stopped ." MizBill whined "But they CAN be stopped. I can make him immortal. I can make their whole family immortal!" Ax bumped his head against Bill's side. " And you know why you can't. You know that isn't right."
"Doesn't mean I can't complain about it." MizBill growled. "Why is it fine when I make my alien friends immortal, but the second I try to sink my Deals into a human, everyone's like 'No, you can't do that' and make such a fuss?"
"Those Friends you chose were all broken, lonely souls. Without you they wouldn't have found happiness on their own. But Sebastian HAS. He's found his happiness and you shouldn't interfere with that."
"Is that all it is?" MizBill blinked. "So...you mean there is no one out there, in all the multiverse, who would have cared for or loved Pyronica and the others?" That...was a depressing thought. Especially in the dimensions where Bill was an asshole. That meant that even if their Bill was a horrible person, he was still their only hope for happiness and acceptance. "That fucking sucks." And now MizBill wanted to adopt all of them as well-
Wait.
MizBill looked up at Ax with panic. "What happened with this Bill's Henchmaniacs? Are they still in that collapsing dimension? Without Bill to take care of them?" he shivered "And what about Seb's original Henchmaniacs from his past life? What happened to them?!"
The Axolotl stayed silent and Bill understood what that meant. He sniffled and began to sob quietly. He knew they weren't HIS friends but...this was sad. "T-that's not fair…" he whimpered. The Axolotl pet his side softly. " They were dangerous criminals who found joy in killing others… " Bill shook his head "Bu-but...I could have...I could have helped them...like I've helped my own friends…"
"... maybe you could have, but it's too late for that now. They will reincarnate back into the world like all others who have died. It's all I can do for them ."
MizBill cried and held onto his paw, wiping his eye on Ax's cool limb. "I hate this…" The Axolotl hugged the 'good kid' to his chest. He didn't know too much about this Bill's history, he hoped his counterpart was dealing with him better than this. It would be a shame for this Bill to end up completely broken like the ones he dealt with. He didn't deserve it. After a while his sobbing finally quieted down and the Axolotl saw that Bill had fallen asleep, his exhaustion from his Deal with Sebastian and emotions wearing him out. The Axolotl curled around the triangle and went to sleep himself.
-.-
Seb leaned closer to inspect Miz's body. Did she breathe when she was in a human(ish) form? He couldn't remember. He hoped she was alright… how long did it take to check on a dimensional connection? Seb had finally finished organizing the spring-summer fashion show for his brand. Fuck his manager forcing him to do this! He knew it was to get more recognized...but still, he liked it when he only made personalized dresses. It was fun. Now he barely had time for that.
He went to the kitchen to prepare lunch while he waited for Miz to wake up and took Miz with him. He left her on the couch, just so she wouldn't be alone when she woke up. While he started on the rice and soup, his phone rang and he quickly answered. "Sebastian!" Wanda shrieked from the other side, making him wince. "Are you free?!"
"I'm always free for you, love…"
Wanda didn't laugh. This was serious. "I was called in the middle of a meeting when I specifically told them not to call ME, and they told me the kids had a fight with some boys. Please go check on them." Seb groaned. Again?! "Alright...I'll go." he heard Wanda yelling on the other end, "Give me a fucking moment, stupid! That wasn't for you, honey, I have to go, bye!"
Seb turned off the kitchen stove, pouting at his half cooked soup and looked at Miz. Fuck it. He wasn't leaving her unconscious here. He carried her bridal style to the car, sat her in the passenger seat awkwardly and buckled her seatbelt before speeding to the Daycare. Damn kids! He loved them so much but they were so unpredictable!
Like him, he couldn't help but admit…
To his incredible relief, Miz began stirring when they got close to the Daycare. "Hey Miz, sorry about moving you, an emergency came up an-" Seb was cut off when Miz began crying out with a tone of panic. He couldn't glance over since he was driving, and pretty fast at that, so he asked "Miz? What's wrong?"
"Ah...ah...ah…" She was half turned and trying to curl herself into a ball. Another driver honked at Seb angrily when he drove past them and Miz flinched violently, covering her head and sobbing. Ok, now Seb was worried, the Daycare was right there so he quickly pulled over and turned the car off. "Miz?"
She was whimpering as she trembled in the passenger seat. Seb really wanted to see what was wrong, did her visit to the Doors not go well? Did the connection not work? But the twins… Seb bit his lip. "Hey Miz...it's okay…" He reached out and gently pet her head, she seemed to have calmed down once the car stopped moving at least. "Look, I...need to go check on the twins. I'll be RIGHT back ok?" He waited for her to nod before he left the car, throwing her one last, worried glance.
The worried man entered the Daycare, only to be attacked and insulted by a woman. "Your kids are monsters! What kind of parents allow their children to behave like savages?!" Seb ignored the woman who angrily followed him and headed for the principal's office, where he found his twins curled up in a corner, trembling, as another boy was getting attended to by a nurse, who was bandaging a large part of his arm.
Oh boy…
The kids' teacher was worriedly speaking to the principal when both women noticed him. "Oh, Mr. Pines! You're finally here!"
"You shouldn't have called my wife, we have explained already that in any emergency you call me. Multiple times." Seb said seriously, growling as the woman sat with the injured and bruised boy. "They would be better if their mother was present!" The angry mother snapped. "Shut up!" Seb snapped back at her and walked over to the whimpering twins. "I wanna know what happened."
"Mr. Pines...we have been very tolerant with Zully's preferences, but today she-"
"I am not addressing you." Seb looked at the teacher angrily. "I am talking to them." He crouched in front of his children. "I wanna know what happened." He repeated. Zoe wiped her eyes and Seb noticed the smudge of blood on her mouth. Ok. First mystery resolved. "He was mean to Zach just because he wants to hurt him!"
"Why was he mean?"
"I-I told Miss Blossom my name was-was Zach now...but-but then she said I was a girl and that I couldn't be called Zach…" The whimpering boy sniffed and Seb's glare hardened. "What else?"
"Then during break time Za-Zach went to the bathroom and that boy pushed him because he said he couldn't go to that bathroom even though he's a boy too and then called him a girl!" Zoe growled, her eyes slowly turning red. "He tried...he tried to make me show him if I was really a boy but I got angry and I kicked him away and started punching him…" Zach admitted quietly. "Then I helped too and bit him really really hard!" Zoe nodded firmly. She leaned in to whisper something to her dad. "I didn't burn him though, but I really wanted to."
Seb turned to look at the woman who insulted him. "Alright. What were you saying about my kids?" He growled. " Your son, tried to make my son show him his genitals !" The woman, blinded by the anger, turned to look at the principal. "You shouldn't even be letting girls into the boy's bathroom! You're messing up her head! My son didn't want girls in a space for boys!"
"A fucking bathroom is a fucking bathroom!" Seb stood up in front of the kids who were still curled up on the corner. "And we've told you how Zach feels! You should make him feel safe at school!" He snarled at the teacher and principal.
"We-we have accepted a lot about...your child, Mr. Pines...but the norms are clear...and that child's birth certificate and papers establish she is a girl…" The principal said, almost guiltily. "And your kids have hurt John…"
Seb sighed. "I WILL apologize for that. I've told them that it's not right to hurt others. So, how about this, Zach and Zoe apologize to John for hurting him and he apologizes to Zach for the sexual harassment. Deal?"
The woman seethed. "Your child's face is covered in my son's blood! And you're acting as if nothing big has happened!"
"Ok, listen, lady, I am trying to solve this like a decent person and YOU aren't HELPING ME!" Seb shouted. "Your son shouldn't have made those stupids comments in the first place! He shouldn't have called my son a girl in the first place! OR attempted to harass Zach into flashing him! And I am offering A LOT by even making the twins apologize to HIS LITTLE ASS even though he deserved it for insulting Zach and trying to see him NAKED!"
"Yeah!" Zoe grinned maliciously at John. "Silence, Zoe!" Seb scolded her. She pouted but sat back down with her brother. Seb was staring at the woman. "I don't care about any of the confusion with Zach's gender. Tell me THIS, do you think it's ok for your son to demand to see someone's genitals ? Is that something you taught him to do? Check someone's body to see what they have? Because that's disgusting."
The woman drew herself up angrily. "Well if your child doesn't want to be checked then she shouldn't-"
"So what I'm HEARING here is that YOU think it's OKAY for people to STRIP CHECK other people to see if they're male or female?!" Seb sneered at her. "Do you do that too? Just demand anyone you meet to drop their pants so you can get a nice, long look at-"
The woman slapped him. The principle and one of the teachers were watching awkwardly, unsure what to do. Zoe and Zach gasped. The woman hit their dad! Seb slowly turned his head back to look at the woman. "Oh my. And YOU were the first to react with physical violence? And you have the GALL to critique how I raise my kids?"
Seb turned to look at his shocked kids. "Bring your stuff, we're leaving." The twins didn't need to be told twice and ran away to get their backpacks and lunchboxes in the classroom. Lucky for them, it was recess.
Seb left the room with his head high and calm, but he was shaking with rage inside. He wanted to kill them...how the fuck dare they?! He met with the kids in the hallway and they grabbed his hands. "Is your face hurting?" Zoe asked innocently. "Nah…" Seb smiled down at the twins tiredly. They walked outside where the car was parked and Miz was staring nervously out of the open window.
"Miz!" The twins gasped with a smile, their fight easily forgotten because their Daddy put those dumb people who were shouting at them in their places, and ran towards the car. Miz noticed they were approaching and smiled in relief. "Hey you little monsters, is it time to pick you up already?" She slipped out of the car to wrap the two of them in a hug.
"Um, no. But Daddy picked us up earlier because we hit a kid, but he deserved it so it's ok." Zoe nodded and Miz smiled. "Of course it's ok if he deserved it." The black-haired girl looked at Seb leaning against the car. "Are...you ok?" She thought the weird face he was making was because he was sad or worried, but he suddenly snorted.
"They beat the shit out of that kid…" He whispered, holding back laughter just for the sake of being a responsible parent. No. You don't laugh at other people's disgraces even if they were funny as hell. Miz laughed and ruffled the twins' curly blond hair. "Nice~"
Seb looked at Miz, she seemed fine now. What had distressed her so much earlier? He wondered if he should ask. "Well, no sense sticking around here. Come on, let's go home." He helped the twins climb back into the car and noticed Miz hadn't moved. "Miz?"
"You go, I...kinda want to check out the neighborhood. I haven't really left the house much after all, and if I'm gonna be staying long term now, I might as well see what else there is around here?" It was a very clear explanation that made perfect sense...but Seb had seen enough bullshit to recognize bullshit when he heard it. Also, this wasn't even nearly at Miz's usual levels of half-truths, meaning something was really bothering her.
"Miz, what's wrong?" He knelt down to look her in the eye. She pressed her lips together. "You're not falling for it huh?" Seb snorted. "Who do you think you're talking to?" She rolled her eyes. "Right...of course." She sighed. "I'm afraid of cars." Seb looked at his car where the twins were waiting to go home, and back at the pouting girl. He grinned. "What? Why? Are cars in space too horrible? I drive pretty decently..." Okay, so he DID speed a little earlier but he was usually a very careful driver.
Miz sighed. "I… had an accident in a car… before being a demon, you know, as a mortal… and I'm terrified of being in one." Seb pouted. Being scared of something wasn't nice. He remembered when he had a complete aversion to water, it made you panic, just like Miz had done when she woke up. "Oh...I didn't know…" He rubbed the back of his neck. "Sorry for dragging you here." She shrugged "It's...fine…" she was rubbing at her arms and shivering.
Seb wondered if he should try to help her get over this fear? Like how Mabel had helped him with his water problem? "Hey...if I drive really, really carefully, would that be ok?" Miz turned up to look at him and hesitated. "Well-"
"You!" The both of them jumped when the angry mother from earlier stormed out, dragging her son behind her. She glared at Seb. "Ugh!" Seb groaned. "What do you want now?!" He snapped. His bad mood coming back. "We aren't in the building anymore, so daycare conversation is over!" He glared. He was glad the kids were already waiting in the car. The woman opened her mouth to say something but her eyes dropped to Miz, who blinked curiously up at her. The woman took in Miz's obviously asian features and frowned. "Who's this?"
"None of your business is who she is. We're going home. Good day." Seb said with a strained smile while placing a hand on Miz's shoulder and moving himself in front of her. The woman frowned. "Is she your kid?" She looked down at Miz. "Do you know this man?"
Miz blinked. "Yeah. Seb is my dad." She responded. At the confused look on the woman's face, Miz rolled her eyes "Adopted." The woman glanced up at Seb and then at Miz again. She huffed and turned away, dragging her son behind her. Once they turned the corner, Seb remarked "Well, the rumor mill around the neighborhood is going to go nuts."
Miz giggled. "Well it's true! I AM pretty much your family?" Then she hesitated, looking strained. "...right?"
Seb ran a hand through her hair and grinned. "Of course. You're my precious soul-sister. And… I guess my daughter now?" He wondered how that would work. Miz perked up, relief flooding her. It wasn't a full confirmation but it WAS a confirmation. She was his Family, not the bad type of family either. The good type.
She looked back at the car. "...how close are we to home?" she considered it.
"Like, a 5 minute drive." Seb assured her. Miz fidgeted a bit. "Ok…" She opened the door and climbed back in. She trembled but buckled herself in and curled down low in her seat, covering her face with her arms. Seb sent her a worried look. Miz's eyes were squeezed shut and her breathing was a little erratic. But she still forced herself to stay in the car. Seb drove carefully, it wasn't too far and it was all along quiet neighborhood streets so he could go slowly. The twins were whining in the back, tired from sitting for so long.
"Daddy, can we go for ice cream?" Zoe asked as Seb turned the car down another street and the man laughed. "What do you think happened back there, kid? I'm still upset you bit him, ew, now I want you to wash your mouth when we get home."
"But you said he deserved it." Zoe whined.
"Yeah…" Seb nodded slowly, giving Miz reassuring smiles from time to time. "But even if he deserved it, it doesn't mean you should have done it…" Seb sighed. Give him a break! He was having conflicting emotions right now and he didn't like it! Should he even ground the kids? Biting and punching were bad...but that boy started it, and Seb would have reacted the same as a child…
"Ok." Seb finally declared. "You aren't grounded, but we aren't going for ice cream after the doctor's appointment either."
"WHAT?!" They cried. "But we had a deal!" Zach pouted. "Ah ah! We made a promise!" Seb sing-songed and Miz managed to laugh a little bit. "And you broke it. We said you would behave at school and biting is not behaving…" The twins both whined but couldn't say anything to defend themselves. They DID bite that boy, even if he deserved it, and biting means they weren't behaving. Miz couldn't help but smile and tease, uncurling slightly when she realized the road was quiet and there weren't other cars driving around, "Well, I was behaving, so do I get ice cream?" She teased as the twins gasped in horror. "No! No fair!" They cried.
"Yes, Miz can get ice cream." Seb went along with it and the twins screamed loudly. "NOO!"
"Hey, hey! Don't shout!" The man winced at the high pitched scream squared. He sighed in relief when he saw the house and he opened the garage to park the car. The twins were pouting in the backseat, pouting with frowns (looking absolutely adorable), Seb and Miz couldn't help but laugh (though Seb noticed Miz's knuckles were white from how tightly she was holding onto her seat, half curled defensively away from the sides of the car). The twins were unbuckled and sent to wash themselves and change their clothes, while they took their backpacks from the trunk.
"Are you ok? You seemed a little better this time?" Seb asked the girl. Miz smiled softly. "The distraction helped. It got my mind off it." She rubbed her arm "Also, no one was honking at you so that was good." She still shivered. "Well, I'm glad…" Seb smiled.
"Do I still get ice cream?" Miz asked and the man sighed. "Ok, yes. There's a bucket hidden behind some frozen meat in the fridge. Enjoy yourself!" Miz cheered and raced off, trying to settle the trembling in her hands. Seb shook his head. Really, it was difficult to remember she was (probably) an adult. He checked the time, still a few hours before the twins' doctors appointment. Well, hopefully he could get some more of his own work done before then.
Miz hummed to herself as she pulled open the lid for the ice cream before realizing she and Seb hadn't had lunch yet. She looked sadly at the ice cream before putting the lid back on and pushing it back into the freezer. Real food first. As much as she loved ice cream, it wasn't particularly filling. Especially when her hunger began acting up.
She looked over and suddenly realized there was rice on the counter along with what looked to be the beginning of soup. She checked on it and sighed in relief that Seb had remembered to turn the heat off before he left. She hummed and thought about what she could cook. Well the twins still had their lunch boxes. Feeling lazy, she flicked her fingers and summoned them to her. A quick check inside showed they had some sandwiches. Hm...rice, stew and sandwiches? Meh. She could work with that.
She summoned some cauliflower and started working.
Seb collapsed on his couch when he was back. Stupid preschool…
He got his drawing ready, looked up the model's measures and started cutting the fabric. Ugh. Due to his procrastination, he was the one who had to make the last two dresses for the show. It was alright though, he liked it. As he worked, he called the model to agree on a date for her to come by and try the dress on at least twice, called his angry manager, who was upset he didn't have everything ready, to tell him to calm down because he was working on it and he always finished on time, and as he sewed the fabric happily, he decided to try calling Wanda as well to inform her of what had happened.
It should be her break time, so she would be able to pick up. "Sebas?" Hehe, he knew it!
"Hi, honey...I took the children home earlier…"
"Really? Ugh, please tell me they aren't hurt…" Wanda asked from the other side of the phone.
"Nope. They're fine..." Seb laughed sheepishly. "But they punched a kid several times until he turned into a blueberry...and Zoe bit the boy hard enough to make him bleed. Cool, huh?"
Wanda fell silent. "Are you kidding me…?" She asked faintly. "Oh my god...And why-"
"Nah, the kids weren't at fault this time. A kid insulted Zach and they just defended themselves." Seb said as he put the first piece of fabric on the mannequin. "I also fought with the kid's mother...I'm sorry."
"I can't believe you, Sebastian!" Wanda shouted. "How are we even going to go to the next PTA meeting now?!" She groaned. It was too much information to dump on her all at once.
"Yeah...about that…" Seb grimaced. He looked at his drawing and started sewing the detailed work by hand. "I was thinking of pulling them out...they're starting kindergarten after the summer anyway!" before Wanda could protest, he added "Besides, Miz is here to look after them now. Plus, I'm sure she can teach them reading and writing much better than the teachers at the daycare."
Wanda sighed from the other side of the phone. "Well...I suppose you're right."
"I'm always right! Except when I'm wrong, but that doesn't happen often~" Seb laughed. Wanda groaned in affectionate exasperation. "Right. Well...we can talk about this when I get home." Seb nodded. That's fair. The phone made the beeping noise that signaled another incoming call. "Well, talk to you later Wanda, there's a call on the other line…"
"Right. See you tonight, love you."
"Love you too~" Seb clicked the button and heard Stanford's voice, "Hello? Sebastian?"
"Oh, what's up, Sixer?" Seb asked. "It hasn't been a day! Ya missing me already?" He laughed. Ford cleared his throat "A-actually, I would like to speak with Xin...or Miz? Or whoever he is being currently."
"O-Oh…" Seb's smile was erased off his face. Right...his brother and Miz...he shuddered a bit. "Alright, let me see where she is, I bet she is still eating-FUCK I DIDN'T FINISH MAKING LUNCH!" The man ran to the kitchen with his phone in hand and sighed in relief when he saw Miz was finishing cooking their food.
"Miz, I love you!" Seb cried and then looked at his phone. "Don't worry, Sixer, I mean it in a brotherly way!"
"O...kay?" Ford was confused. "It's Fordsie, Miz, he wants to talk to you." Seb offered Miz his phone. She took it with a brief look of uncertainty. Seb didn't miss that. "H-hello?"
"O-Oh! Xin...Miz, right now...right?"
"Right…" The girl repeated awkwardly. Seb could hear what Ford was saying because it was in hands free mode. "What's up Fordsie?"
"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you. I was startled and...I reacted before I remembered and I just want you to know that I won't do that again. I'm so, very sorry."
Miz's face went expressionless. "I told you it's fine. I shouldn't have...you're obviously still uncomfortable with me being...well...ME...and-" She sighed, rubbing her face. "I think we shouldn't mess around with ropes again for a while…your hands are good enough..." Seb gaped in shock, not knowing what was bothering him more. The fact Ford hurt Miz or the fact that HE USED ROPES!
"I am not uncomfortable doing it with your true form!" Ford insisted and Seb's mouth opened even more. "Please...give me another chance! I know my...rejection of your triangle form must have hurt your feelings but I swear I won't-"
"It's fine." Miz said firmly. "You still hate Bill. I get it. We...we don't have to...I won't force you to...look at me when I'm like that." Her voice wobbled a little. "You shouldn't have to force yourself to…"
"But I'm not! Really! Please Miz, I really DO want to try it with you in your true form." Ford begged. "There's so much I can learn about your anatomy and…"
"Maybe not now." Miz shot him down. "We're still new to this, I don't...want us to rush it. Let's just take this slow. I can...try meeting you in my true form and...just...hang out. No touching, no sessions, just...hang out."
"...Ok." Ford agreed. "If that's what you think is best." He sighed. "I really AM sorry."
"I know." Miz closed her eyes and breathed. "What the other Bill put you through was awful. I shouldn't expect you to be over it, even if it's been 5 years." after all, Ford had been haunted by that other Bill for nearly two decades. That was a long time for humans.
"Yeah." A sound came from the phone like Ford had sat down on a rolling chair. "He...hurt me, betrayed me...nearly drove me mad with those...nightmares…"
"He chained you up as well…" Miz added. "That...must have been unpleasant. And us, with the ropes and...I think we shouldn't try using anything more than our actual bodies for a while."
"...That might be best." Ford's voice was slightly muffled, like he was rubbing his face. "When can I see you again? For either a normal session or just...hanging out?"
"Hm…" Miz stirred the food in the pot. "Maybe tomorrow night." Ford made a sound of agreement. "Alright then. Thank you, for giving me another chance. I really am sorry." Miz managed a smile "It's ok. I forgive you. You're too cute to stay mad at anyway." Ford chuckled lightly and the two said their goodbyes before Miz closed the call and handed the phone back to Sebastian.
The poor man received the phone with a trembling hand. What the heck did he just hear…? Ford and Miz were going to try it out in Miz's BILL FORM?! How...how would that even work?! Holy Fuck, he didn't need that image in his head! "I-I think I am going to...go find the twins...yeah…" He stumbled out of the kitchen and bumped against a wall. "AAAHHH!" He screamed once he was out of view and Miz rolled her eyes. What a silly man…
Seb wasn't kidding when he said he was going with the twins, they saw him reach Zoe's bed to lay down. Sir Bedazzle, who was in his tree house napping until Seb woke him up, got out and jumped over Seb's butt, barking happily. He loved all his owners! "Hehe, he's on your butt!" Zach pointed out usefully. Seb groaned into the pillow. "I need to bleach my braaaain!" Sir Bedazzle jumped on Seb's back and rolled around, barking innocently. The twins looked at each other and shrugged. Daddy was weird.
"Kids~lunch is ready~" Miz called from downstairs. The two cheered and raced downstairs, Sir Bedazzle running after them, barking and jumping on his little legs.
Seb stayed there a few minutes until the twins and Sir Bedazzle came back for him. "You need to eat too, dummy!" Zoe said as she pulled his left leg and Zach the right. Their acorn puppy barked in support. "Noooo!" Seb moaned and held onto the head of the bed. He didn't want to go down and see Miz right now! She just talked about how she had sex with his brother using ropes right in front of him!
The twins shared a look and nodded. Seb yelped when a blue and green glow surrounded him and lifted him off the bed. The twins had been practicing with Miz and found they worked better if they used their powers together. The two squinted in concentration as they carried him down the stairs that way.
"Kids! Put me down!" Seb ordered. "Nope! We are eating lunch and Miz said all of us must eat together!" Zach announced. He was the first to lose his concentration when they reached the table and half the glow disappeared, leaving just Zoe's green. Zoe smiled at the delicious food. She ran towards it to take a seat, the green glow left Seb entirely and he fell to the floor with a thud. "Ugh…"
"Come on, lazy butt, the sooner we eat, the sooner I can clean the dishes." Miz called out. She was already scarfing down her fried rice with stir fried cauliflower and chicken. There were small bowls with soup next to everyone's bowls and the cheese sandwiches were lined up neatly in the middle of the table. She took one and dipped it into the soup before taking a bite. The twins were chewing on their food with happy smiles, bits of rice stuck to their round cheeks.
Seb slowly stood up from the floor and took a seat next to the twins, on the opposite side from Miz. He slowly grabbed fork and stuffed his mouth with chicken and rice. When he managed to chew and swallow everything he put in his mouth, he looked at Miz with a sigh. "If...If your...sessions with Ford, you know...if they aren't going well or...or he hurts you...just-just tell me ok?" He said finally. They were both adults, at least he thought so, and they were consenting to have kinky sex… however, he wouldn't allow Ford to hurt his...little sister!
Miz nodded. "Of course. I'm not gonna let him do anything to me I don't want." She lifted the bowl to drink the soup. "I mean, they do hurt, but in a good way? You know?"
"I-I don't really know, yeah…" Seb said blushing. "We-we don't do it that way…" He mumbled in embarrassment. The twins looked at the clock and, remembering how to tell the time, they realized that if they dilly dallied, they could probably miss the doctor's appointment. So, Zach and Zoe started eating very slowly, even when the food was delicious. It was worth it if they missed having to get shots! Miz frowned at them. She flicked her fingers and suddenly the food smelled like the most delicious thing they had ever experienced. The twins' mouths watered and they couldn't hold back from eating quickly. It was so good. Within a few minutes they had finished their food AND drank the soup. They blinked as their senses seemed to go back to normal and gasped at Miz.
"No fair!" Zoe whined. She knew the dragon must have used some kinda of magic on them! That shit eating grin on her face proved it. "Well, looks like you two are done eating~" She sang. She wasn't technically using magic on them, she magic'ed their food.
"N-No!" Zach bit his lip as he thought of something to say. "We-we are still hungry! Yes! Right, Zoe?" He asked his sister and the girl rubbed her tummy. "Really hungry...I guess we will have to stay here and eat because we need new-tree-rents to grow up!"
Seb realized what they were doing as well. "Well, you can have a second plate…" The twins beamed. "AFTER your appointment. And I want to see you eat everything when we come back." He stood up, taking his empty plate to the sink to rinse. "Go brush your teeth."
Miz grinned madly at the worried look on the twins' faces. She loved when Seb used his Dad Powers to order the kids around! She snickered like the evil little demon she was as the kids walked off with their heads hung low. She gathered up all their plates and bowls to put next to the sink so Seb could rinse them. "So they're getting a check up or just shots?"
"Both." Seb replied. "I also want to ask the doctor what to do about Zach." Miz nodded. "Well he's still only 5 years old. If he's still a boy when he's older he will need hormone treatments...if he wants them." She frowned. "Would you...want me to just...turn him into a boy?"
Seb looked at Miz with his eye wide. She could do that, couldn't she?...But what if she did, what if he accepted her offer to change Zach entirely and he...decided it wasn't what he wanted? They were trying to be supportive of the twins' decisions and this was one of them, but maybe they needed more time?
"Do you think he might change his mind later? We wouldn't mind either way but...I can't be certain of what he wants yet…" Seb laughed nervously. The twins still struggled to tie up their shoes correctly, he wouldn't want to make such an important decision for Zach. Miz patted his back. "Not right now. When he's older and can make a proper, informed decision." She shrugged, "Besides, some people do change their minds. But that's on them. Their body, their feelings, their choice."
"That...that sounds nice...yeah...I have to talk to Wanda about it though."
"Of course." Miz nodded with a smile. "Well, you're going to be late for your appointment! Go!"
"...You don't want to come with me? I...I will break if the twins start crying in fear." He pouted. "Maybe...you can tell me more 'bout your relationship with Fordsie?" Miz hesitated at the idea of going back in the car but sighed when she realized she couldn't keep avoiding them forever. Out in space it was easy to do since cars weren't really a 'thing' that people bothered with. But if she's gonna stay here on Alternative Earth then she had to get over this. Plus, she hated being so afraid of them.
"Fine, I'll come along. You know it helps if they have something to hug while getting their shots." She told him. "I used to bring a little stuffed animal with me." and when she was older, she would just listen to her ipod really loud and pretend she wasn't sitting there as the vampires- wait, sorry, doctors, jabbed her with needles. She remembered how her mother would laugh whenever she called the doctor a "吸血僵尸!"
Seb smiled widely and hugged her. "Thank you! I'll ask the kids to bring a toy, wait for us in the garage." Miz nodded and slowly walked towards the car. It was a nice, scary, black car. Wanda had a gray one while Seb's was black. The three Pines came and Seb was helping the twins carry at least 6 stuffed toys in his arms. "They wanted to take them all…" He sighed. He sat the stuffed toys on the twins' legs after he buckled their seatbelts and then turned around to buckle Miz's seatbelt. She was sitting in the back this time, between the twins.
"It'll be alright, ok? I'll drive slow again."
"Yeah, Daddy! Drive super, super slow!" Zoe supported the idea with a smile. If they went slow enough they could miss the appointment. Seb rolled his eyes while Miz giggled. "I should be fine. After all…" Miz reached up to hug the twins "I've got you two here to protect me right?" She was shaking a little but smiled regardless.
"UH HUH!" They exclaimed. "We only use magic for good because we help people!" They agreed. Seb smiled and started the car before driving in the hospital's direction. Miz was tense during the ride, this time longer than the distance to the Daycare, but the twins kept her occupied and distracted by telling her the names and history of their stuffed toys. Apparently, Mrs. Fwuff the Kangaroo had a divorce with Mr. Pom, the Dinosaur. Who knew?
Eventually, while classical music played softly on the radio, they reached the hospital! Seb left the car to the valet parking and threatened to make his life miserable if he found so much as a scratch. The twins held two stuffed toys each to their chest with one arm as they held onto Miz's hands with their other. If you looked at them, you would coo at the sight of a grown up man carrying four stuffed toys, 1 penguin, 1 crocodile and two puppies, while a little girl held hands with a set of twins.
He registered them in for the appointment as Miz and the twins waited and then they only had to wait for the kids' pediatrician to call them.
Miz chatted with the kids, distracting them from the upcoming examination and subsequent shots. A few other families were in the waiting room. A mother with her son was trying to calm the boy as he fussed. "Come on Jeremy, the nice doctor will give you a check up and then you get a nice piece of candy. Isn't that nice?"
"NO!" The boy shrieked, throwing a tantrum right there in the waiting room. "I hate the doctor! I hate her! No! No!"
The doctor's assistant called on Jeremy's mom to go in next and she took her screaming child inside. The twins shifted nervously and scooted closer to Miz and Daddy. "Scared." Zach and Zoe whispered.
Seb stroked their blond curls. "Don't worry, that kid was scared because he was a little kid and you two are big kids right?" They sniffed and nodded. "Yeah...we're five…" Zoe showed him 5 little fingers and Seb kissed her tiny hand. "Exactly! And you know the doctor is only there to help! That kid was too young to understand."
The twins pouted but nodded. They understood. "Yes…"
Miz patted his shoulder. "Good job…" She whispered. The twins sat up straighter after that, trying to prove they were strong and not scared. Miz couldn't help but remember all the times she'd been in a hospital as a human...the time she broke her leg was the worst. She sincerely hoped the twins never break any of their bones. She shivered at the memory. Even now she hated stairs, and looking down from the top of stairs, and heights in general…
The higher up you were, the more things broke when you fall.
Seb's leg started bouncing as he got distracted, thinking about the upcoming fashion show, and the twins giggled, putting their toys on their dad's leg to watch them jump before falling to the floor and repeating the process. Even Miz joined in with the game. Eventually, the twins' names were called by the assistant. "Zoe and Zully Pines?"
Zach pouted angrily and pulled at his dad's sleeve. "Dad…?"
"We'll change it, ok? Let's go." Seb sighed, so many things to do, and grabbed the twins' hands to take them inside the doctor's office.
She was a nice woman, middle aged, with dark hair and dark eyes. She had been the twins' pediatrician since they were born. Wanda and Seb trusted her a lot, she was the best they could find for their babies.
"Oh, hello little ones!" She greeted the nervous kids with a kind smile. "We're going to do a full check up today alright? Look at you, you've both gotten so much bigger."
"We turned 5 last Friday…" Zoe shared with the woman. "All of our family came to visit us! My daddy's triplets, uncle Shermie, my cousins, and we got lots of presents!" She was warming up already. Seb and Miz smiled at the girl's social nature. Seb looked like such a proud papa it was hilarious.
"Did you like the presents you got, Zu?" The doctor absently realized the younger twin still wore their hair short.
"Y-Yeah…" He smiled a bit. "But my name…" He trailed off. What if she also shouted at him like the teachers or Amanda's mom did? He hated being called a girl…
"His name is Zach now…" Zoe smiled. The doctor, Dr. Marshall, only hesitated a second before smiling kindly. "Well that's a very cool name. Is it short for Zachary?"
Zach smiled a little more confidently. "Yeah! I chose it during my birthday!" Dr. Marshall clapped. "Well congratulations little man. It's a good strong name." Zach looked at his Dad proudly and Seb chuckled.
"Alright...Who's going to start with the check up?" The doctor wondered aloud. "I'll do it!" Zoe volunteered and climbed onto the examination bed without help! The paper sheet rustled as she got on. Dr. Marshall laughed "Alright then Zoe. Just sit down." She glanced over at Miz. "And who's your friend?"
"That's Miz! She's our new big sister!" Zoe replied, wiggling her feet. Dr. Marshall nodded. "Well it's very nice to meet you, Miz." She held out a hand and Miz shook it. She glanced at Sebastian. "A new sister?" she questioned him. Seb grinned and shrugged "It's a little complicated." She accepted that answer and moved on. "Alright Zoe, I'm going to check your heart beat now…"
The exam went by normally as she wrote down notes on her clipboard. Finally it was time for the vaccine shot. Zoe whimpered and clutched her stuffed animals. Miz came over and placed her hands on either side of Zoe's head. "Zoe. Look at me." She smiled. "Can you count how many eyelashes I have?"
Zoe giggled. That was silly. But she still stared closely at Miz's face, she liked Miz's eyes. They were so dark they looked black. It was really cool. "1, 2, 3, 4…" she counted off. She heard the snapping sound of latex and felt Dr. Marshall take hold of her left arm. She faltered and let out a whimper. "Shh, it's ok, come on Zoe, you lost count." Miz pulled her attention back to her, pressing her face close, their foreheads touching. "Come on, you count my eyelashes and I count yours."
"O-okay…" Zoe tried really hard to focus on Miz's face instead of the cold swab being brushed over her shoulder. "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6-" She laughed a little when Miz began poking her cheeks with her thumbs, Miz's nails were pointy. "-7, 8, 9, 10, 11…"
"Done." Dr. Marshall said. Zoe blinked in surprise. It was done already? Miz pulled back with a proud grin. "See? That wasn't so hard." Zoe looked over to see Dr. Marshall put a cotton ball and bandaid over her shoulder. "Oh." The five year old grinned. That wasn't scary at all. Her shoulder felt a little funny but it didn't hurt too much. She laughed as Miz picked her up into a hug.
Zach, who was sitting on his dad's lap, looked up when Zoe was released from her hug. "It didn't hurt?" He asked softly. "Nopey!" The blonde girl smiled. "Miz made something magical because it didn't hurt!"
Seb put Zach on the floor and nudged him to go to the bed. "It is your turn, baby. You'll see it doesn't hurt." Seb, not even drunk or possessed, would get a shot himself, crazy huge needle in his arm? Hah! No thanks! But kids had to get them.
"Ok, there we go!" The woman picked up Zach by his armpits and lifted him up to the examination bed, the paper Zoe had been sitting on, crunched. Just like she did with Zoe, the doctor checked his eyes, his throat, his heartbeat, his weight and height. There was a chart with the averages of height and weight by ages and sexes. The light blue part was for boys, and the pink part for girls. Zach innocently searched for his age in the blue part and hoped he was in the right height.
"Ok, Zach, can you sit down again for your vaccine?" The doctor asked as she checked the kid's file. Miz was by the nervous boy's side immediately and held one of his tiny hands while Miz grabbed his stuffed toy with the other. "Hi Zach!"
"Hi…" Zach winced when his arm was grabbed. "Dad…"
"Hey, why are you scared?" Miz made the dinosaur ask. "I am here to protect you! Let's see! Can you sing the alphabet to me? Oh! I never learned it!" The dinosaur wailed.
Seb took his phone to snap a photo to show Wands later.
"A, b, c, d...e, f, g...h, i, j, k…." Zach stopped singing and winced a bit.
"Um...Is that all the letters?"
"I also know the alphabet!" Zoe offered innocently and Seb picked her up to sit her on his lap. "Sing it for me?" That way, both of them would be distracted.
"No...l, m, n, o, p…" Zach continued. Dr. Marshall wiped the little drop of blood and put a cotton ball and a bandaid on him. "There you are, Zach, you two were really brave!"
Zach poked at his bandaid and smiled at Miz who also pulled him into a hug. "You see? It wasn't that bad!" She squeezed the adorable toddler. He hugged her back. Miz made everything better. Seb looked over at Dr. Marshall. "Hey, Miz, can you take the kids outside for a bit? I have to talk to Dr. Marshall about a few things." The girl nodded and took each of the twin's hands and exited the exam room. "Come on you little monsters, you don't get ice cream but you DO get a lollipop."
"I want ice cream more…" Zoe whined. Miz lowered her voice to whisper "Maybe the lollipops will magically be ice cream flavor…"
"Ohhh! I want chocolate fudge!" Zach jumped in excitement. Zoe tugged on Miz's hand "I want strawberry!" The door closed and Seb grinned wryly. Of course Miz was going to help them cheat. He shook his head, well, they did very well taking their shots so he wasn't going to say anything. Dr. Marshall was watching him "I'm guessing you wish to speak to me about Zach?"
Seb nodded when he saw the door closed. "You may have noticed he has changed his name now…" He laughed nervously but without humor. He bit his lip. "Wanda and I were reading about this...we-we want to make Zach happy, but-but are we really helping him by letting him do this?"
Dr. Marshall gestured for Seb to sit down. He did so, bouncing his leg and wringing his hands together. She gave him a gentle smile. "No one knows for sure what is good for their child. But Zach is still young. I say you let him be whoever he wants to be. Within reason of course. Don't attempt to get him any corrective surgeries or hormone treatments, not yet. Once he's older you will know for sure." She sighed and looked at the chart where she'd written down their measurements. "I think you and Wanda are doing a fine job. You're supportive, which is more than most families are. Now, I don't suggest anything drastic like legally changing his name and documents until he is older, which would bring with it, an entire set of problems, but until you know for sure, you shouldn't permanently change anything."
"But what if he is completely sure now?" Seb insisted and frowned at his leg bouncing. He manually stopped it with his hands. Dumb body. "What if not doing anything now is going to make everything horrible in the future?!" Seb didn't want his kid hating them, hating him . He would die if he lost Zach.
"Today they had a fight with a boy after the teacher called Zach, Zully in front of all the kids…" Seb confessed. "The other boy didn't let Zach get in the boy's bathroom and...demanded that Zach show him he was really a boy…" Seb coughed and the doctor frowned worriedly. "Should we really just...let that happen? Zach is not an aggressive kid but he seemed to be really upset by being called a girl…"
"Like…" The doctor sighed. She hadn't had many cases about this. She wasn't used to dealing with stuff like this, not with children THIS young. "Like I said, we shouldn't rush things…" The woman smiled warmly at the worried, pouting man. "You could take Zach to the psychologist maybe? To start knowing how he feels about this." She sighed. "I'm a pediatrician, not a child psychologist. My best suggestion is you get Zach to a professional to talk about how he feels. He might have to speak with them long term as he grows up and puberty happens, since a lot can change during that period of a child's life."
She reached out and patted Sebastian's hand. "And I can see that you only want to do what's best for Zach in a way that would make him happy. In the end, support from his family is what he needs most." Seb nodded, tearing up faintly "And you're doing a great job, you and Wanda are wonderful parents." Seb wiped his tears from his brow and smiled. "Ok...thank you…" The woman grabbed four lollipops she forgot to give the twins and smiled. "It's alright, Sebastian. here, for you and your...older daughter."
Seb's eye widened and he grinned a bit more. "Thanks, Doc!" He took the lollipops happily and the doctor chuckled when he stood up. "Thank you."
Seb walked to the door and went to the waiting room to meet with the twins and Miz. She was telling them a story about discovering a species of alien that looked exactly like a cheeseburger and how she had accidentally eaten their king. Some other parents and children were listening to the story as well and laughing as they thought she was simply making up a story to entertain the twins. Seb shivered at the knowledge that Miz was, if not cannibalistic since those burger people aren't Flatlanders and therefore by the definition of cannibalism it didn't count, a man eater. "I apologized! And I even brought them all back to life afterward. The Souls didn't get pulled away since they were in my stomach and I can't digest Souls without permission…"
Seb sat down so Miz could finish her story. He didn't want more parents getting angry at him today. It took a while, but the girl finally finished her story and everyone, children and adults alike, clapped. "Thank you, thank you!" Miz smiled. Ah! The feeling of happiness coming from them tasted so good!
Zoe noticed her dad sitting there on his phone and trotted towards him "Daddy, did you hear Miz's story?" she threw herself into his lap, laughing. Seb grinned and ruffled her hair "I sure did. Now, you want your lollipops?" He held them out and Zoe grabbed at them immediately. "Gimme! Gimme!"
Seb held his hand out of her reach "What do you say?" He had to teach them manners after all. They sucked, but they had to learn them. Zoe and Zach both stared at him with wide eyes "Please~?" Dear lord their puppy dog eyes were getting better. Seb laughed and handed them the candy.
Gah! He loved them so fucking much! The mystery twins had made him weak and his children had him on his knees for them! "Let's go home, squirts." Seb dragged Zoe closer to him as she struggled to open the paper and they walked to the exit. Miz grabbed the toys and Zach before she followed Sebas.
"I don't get a lollipop?" Miz pouted as they walked. The man ignored the girl until they reached the parking lot. He handed them the ticket to get his car back and pulled out another lollipop from his shirt pocket. "Tah-dah!" He then held it above her head and watched her jump for it. The angry pout on her face was adorable. "No fair!" Miz wailed.
Seb laughed wickedly as the twins licked their lollipops with amused expressions. "I will kill you in your sleep!" Miz growled. "Oh yeah?" Seb raised an eyebrow. "You wouldn't do that." He grinned. "You love me!" He crouched and hugged the twins. "And you would leave these little babies orphans!" Miz folded her arms and shrugged. "Wanda will still be here." Seb laughed and handed her the lollipop. "Well I'm sure my babies would miss me if I was gone." Zach and Zoe nodded "Don't kill daddy. Even if he's a meanie butt."
"Hey!" Seb pouted.
Miz grumbled, tore off the paper and put the candy in her mouth to suck on it. "I still know where you sleep…" The car was brought out, Seb gave the poor young man an intimidating look, just because he was a meanie butt, before getting the kids and Miz (who hesitated a little but still went in, trembling) into the car.
"Daddy we want to eat something!" Zoe roared with her hands in the air. "Fries!" Zach declared. Miz smiled a little as she burrowed herself deeper into the seat, gripping her seatbelt tightly. Seb grinned as he drove carefully. "You said you were still hungry after lunch...You can eat your second plate when we get home…" He laughed madly as the twins started hitting the window, trying to escape.
""Noo!""
-.-
The twins apologized for lying about still being hungry and were saved from eating again. Seb took them to their room and after a bit of struggle, got the kids to take their nap. Wanda and him had read it was good for them to nap at least a few hours everyday, so they had been doing that since they were babies.
Glad for the moment of peace, Seb and Miz worked on folding the clothes. Miz collected the laundry and Seb ironed them while humming. They heard the front door opening and Seb left the iron aside to go check. To his surprise, Wanda was closing the door and moaning as she kicked her shoes away. "Hey!" Seb smiled widely. "You came home early today!" He leaned to get his deserved kiss. "Oh my god you shaved! Finally!" Wanda smiled widely. "What the heck do you mean-" She cut him off when she grabbed each side of his face to kiss his lips passionately. They were separated by Miz who came to say hi too and hugged the blonde. "Welcome back~" She sighed as she nuzzled Wanda's side. "I shaved him! You like it?"
"You didn't like my beard…?" Seb looked offended and Wanda made a sheepish grin. "I like it more this way…"
"Thanks, it's nice to know I'm appreciated." Seb pouted.
Miz looked up at the blonde woman. "It was a nice day. I kept your husband from destroying the house~" She sang. Seb gasped. "Lies and slander!" Wanda rolled her eyes. "Well, thank you anyway Miz." She turned to Seb who had accepted the fact that no one liked him with facial hair. "How're the twins? Are they alright? You remembered to go to the doctors right?"
"Of course I remembered, duh!" Seb stuck his tongue out at Miz. Wanda sighed. Was she raising 2 or 4 kids? "The check up went fine! The kids behaved really well."
"I got them distracted!" Miz smiled proudly. "It was the same with Pyrone and Pynelope, they hated getting their Standard Immunization shots. But since we travel through the multiverse a lot, it was incredibly necessary for them to be up to date."
Seb blinked. Pyrone and Pynelope? What kind of names were those? Wait, they sounded like…
"Wait! Are those...Pyronica's children?!" He cried. Well, Miz DID mention that her kids were adopted, so...she took in Pyronica's kids. Well, yeah, actually that made perfect sense. Miz nodded. "I should show you some memories of them. They were such cute children…" She looked sad for a bit before shaking her head. No, no angsting right now.
"I bet…" Seb smiled kindly. Wanda glanced between the two of them. "I will come down in a bit, I wanna see the twins." she said before going upstairs. "We'll be doing laundry, honey, see ya there!" Seb grinned goofily when she saluted and gave him a thumbs up.
Seb and Miz returned to the laundry room, Miz had disconnected the iron just in case before leaving the room, and they went back to their chores. "I just remembered…" Seb connected the iron and looked at the garment. He liked this shirt from Wanda, it looked hella good on her. "-Wanda sort of wanted to have triplets...can you imagine the damn chaos?!" He laughed. "My mom says we were exhausting…"
Miz blinked. "So...are you saying…" her form shifted and suddenly there was a tiny blond toddler standing there. She/he(?) looked just like Zoe and Zach, or rather, like a mix between the two. "...like this?" the child asked in a high voice.
Seb gaped and crouched in front of Miz. "No way…! You-you look just like the twins!"
He poked their belly, staring at the heterochromatic eyes, but instead of having a left green eye and right brown eye like Zoe, they had a right green eye and a left brown one. The child squealed when Seb poked them. "That tickles!" they laughed. The child brushed their long, fluffy hair out of their eyes.
"Well, I guess you're my kid now." Seb grinned. Wanda chose that moment to enter the room but stopped short. She had just been with both kids!
"Look, Wands, we have triplets now!" Seb declared picking up the kid by his/her(?) armpits. Miz(?) squealed and kicked their little legs. "Weee!" they cheered as they were lifted up. "You better not drop me or I'll bite you!" Seb laughed. "You sound JUST like Zoe when you say that!"
"...Miz just transformed into the twins'...triplet?"
"Cool, huh?!" Seb smiled. Wanda chuckled and walked towards her husband and Miz. "You do look like them…" She was squealing mentally. It would be so cute if Miz really was their triplet! But then she remembered who and what Miz was. Wanda sighed. "As nice as this is, we can't just suddenly have another child. Miz is fine since we could say we adopted her from overseas, but a triplet? That's too much." Seb and Miz pouted at the same time. Now that Miz looked like the twins, their faces looked almost the same. "But you wanted triplets!" Seb whined and hugged Miz to himself.
Wanda laughed sheepishly. "How would we even explain it?" The world had laws and logic that magic like this simply couldn't account for. "I could erase and change everyone's mind!" Miz shrugged. They paused. "But that's probably a bad thing to do huh?" Wanda sighed. "Well, yes, there's that. But also…" the blonde woman grimaced before she looked up at Seb. "Miz is dating your brother and that would make this MUCH too...weird…"
Miz blinked in confusion. "Dating Ford? What do you...oh…" a mischievous smirk appeared on their chubby little face. "Yeah, I can see why that would be...problematic…" they giggled.
Seb shuddered. He hadn't thought of that. Ah! Nope. Nope. He just thought of Ford with Miz in THIS form and he would have to slit Ford's throat for that and he really didn't want to. "Wanda's right. No triplets. Only I can be a triplet!" Miz giggled and 'poof'ed back into Miz, which made Seb nearly fall over at the sudden change of mass. "Warn me first!"
Miz got back on her feet. "So~me and Ford huh?" she pressed her lips together. "So that's why everyone was acting so weird…" she grinned, a wide, maniac expression "That's pretty hilarious…" Miz purred. Seb and Wanda weren't sure what she was muttering about.
"So…" Seb coughed, glad he wasn't thinking dark things anymore. "When...did this all happen? I know you met him before so…" He went back to ironing as Wanda helped him to fold the clothes. Miz shrugged. "I've seen Fords in different dimensions." She grinned "And YOU were there for that other Bill who was dating his Ford~" she giggled pervertedly.
"What?" Wanda asked as Seb gagged. "Please don't remind me…"
"Is it...normal...for demon Bills to...like Stanford?" Wanda asked and turned to look at Seb. "Did you like the Stanford you had in your past life?" She asked innocently. She was not saying Seb liked his brother now, but it would explain why he liked him so much, even when Ford treated him like shit.
"EWWW! NO! I JUST WANTED TO USE HIM!" Seb complained. Miz made an exaggerated gasp "So you just USED your Ford? Oh my~" she was grinning so hard, her cheeks were starting to hurt. "But to be fair, he is quite handsome and those rough, strong hands of his can grab you in just the right way and~"
"STOP!" Seb shrieked and covered his ears. "MAKE HER STOP!" Seb sobbed at Wanda who looked quite uncomfortable as well. "Maybe you can talk about something less...private." Wanda asked as Seb cried on her shoulder. Miz giggled like the demon she was but mercifully stopped talking about it. This was a misunderstanding, yes. But it was too funny not to play along. She wondered how long she could keep this up until Ford realized and tried to correct people. Well...Mabel knew and perhaps she could get the teenager to play along. Mabel was very much an agent of chaos as well. It's why Bill actually liked her.
Wanda patted her husband's back. "There…there...it will pass…" Seb sniffed and glared at the grinning girl. Now he didn't want to know anything about her relationship with Ford. Ugh. He tried to be nice here but life just really didn't let him!
The clothes were ironed and folded by the couple as Miz watched them happily, thinking of more ways to tease (traumatize) them (not in a bad way!). They were going to take the clothes to their respective rooms when they heard a little tired voice calling Seb. "Daaaddyy….!" Looks like the twins woke up from their nap. Miz helped them carry the laundry while the parents went up to check on their kids. She had an idea of another fun prank later.
"Mommy!" The twins gasped and hugged their mom tightly. She came earlier today! "Hello, my babies." Wanda hugged them back, kissing their round cheeks. "Mommy, a boy bothered Zach today but I defended him!" Zoe announced, obviously deciding to leave out the fact that they got in trouble and Dad had to pick them up. Wanda smiled "Oh? You did? That's my big girl." She sat down on Zoe's bed as Sir Bedazzle ran around them, barking. "Well what else did you do today?"
"We went to the doctor and we were really good!" Zach sat down on Zoe's bed. "And we got a lollipop, but Miz helped us and it didn't hurt!"
"I have a photo." Seb pulled out his phone and showed Wanda the cute moment. She cooed loudly. Now she had to thank Miz even more! Sir Bedazzle jumped onto the bed, 'sniffed' the phone and licked it. His saliva was plain sugar water, but Seb still grumbled. "No! Sir Bedazzle!" He scolded. The acorn puppy barked and wiggled his body back and forth. Miz pet his head and grinned. For a random creature given life just for fun, he was coming along nicely. If he lived for a full year...would he gain an actual Soul? This was something she wanted to experiment with. Even if he didn't, perhaps his children would have Souls. Miz debated creating more Acorn puppies, Mabel would love to have one…
"Well, do you think it's time for dinner yet?" Wanda asked her husband. Seb stroked his chin, startled once again by it's smoothness, "Sure. What do you guys want for dinner?" The twins bounced in place. "Fries!" They cheered. Sir Bedazzle jumped up and down with them. "Fries! Fries! Fries!" They jumped so hard, the little acorn was sent flying, and would have hit the floor if Miz hadn't caught him.
"Ok, just because you behaved we can make chicken sandwiches and fries, but don't get used to it!" Seb warned with a smile and the twins shouted so loud the neighbors could probably hear. He shook his head, his kids really were just like him. He doesn't know how Wanda put up with them all. He was grateful for it though, it made him love her all the more. "Sh...the neighbors will get mad…" Wanda silenced them with a giggle and Seb stood up. Fuck the neighbors. If his need to make noise had been satisfied as a kid he would be more merciful right now. "Let's go make FRIES!" Seb shouted and the twins screamed even louder before running out of their room, followed by their screaming dad.
Miz looked at Wanda. "Kids, am I right?" she rolled her eyes. Wanda snorted. "Were your children like that?" She wasn't sure if it was ok to ask such a thing but aside from a wistful look, Miz still smiled. "Yeah. I had 4 kids, one now. Ammy's the oldest but he's also immortal like I am so...well…" She ran a hand through her hair "I think he's also my biological child? Not sure how that happened though…"
"Ah...didn't you...give birth to him or? I'm sorry, I don't know how your species reproduces."
"Well I think he was born from a Piece, which is kind of like an egg. I ejected one a really long time ago. Normally a Piece cannot survive long enough to hatch if it's not inside a Slot, that's essentially a womb, but through some miracle, Ammy's Piece survived and he was born. It was an accident, I hadn't meant to create a child...but I'm really thankful it happened." Miz smiled at the thought of her first born, Ammy was a strange child, but she loved him all the same.
"And my next two kids were twins too. Pyrone and Pynelope. Not my kids, technically. My best friend was pregnant. Her species eats their mate so I offered to co-parent and help her raise her children."
Wanda blinked. Eating their own mate. Well, she's heard of animals who did that...but thinking of a sentient person doing that to another person was...disturbing. "I would like to hear about them sometime." She said instead. She was trying hard to be accepting of other species and their culture. Miz nodded. "I'll show you guys my memories of them sometime." She looked away. "And then...there was Quackers." She frowned. "I made a joke about giving up a first born in exchange for a Deal and this crazy bitch took it."
"What?! Someone gave you their first born?!" Wanda was indignant. What was wrong with that...alien?! They should have protected their kids, not sell them to a fucking demon! She took a deep breath to not lose her calm. "You took care of that child I guess...you like children…"
"Well...At first I didn't want to get attached, I knew Quackers was mortal and I knew it would hurt to lose them if I lost them as well...but, fuck, that kid! You should have seen her! She was so adorable!" Miz hugged the acorn puppy tightly. "I...couldn't resist. She seduced me with her cuteness!" She groaned. "You try having a Pladibear hug you and NOT go 'Awwww~' they're so fucking soft! Like...a fluffy marshmallow!"
Wanda had no idea what a Pladibear was but it really sounded adorable. She smiled widely, loving the way Miz got excited talking about her kids. It was sad to think that they had all passed away...but...perhaps talking about them would help her mourn properly?
Sir Bedazzle whimpered at being crushed so hard. He wiggled his stubby little legs and Miz let go. The acorn puppy immediately ran off downstairs to be with his master. At least master doesn't crush him! Wanda watched the acorn run away. Huh. "I really can't believe we have an acorn as a pet…" Miz grinned. "He's a special pet for a special family." Wanda smiled and pulled the girl for a hug. "Urgh! You're so cute!" The blonde stroked her hair. Miz purred.
It felt weird to have...a mother? That's kinda what Wanda is. Miz considered that. Jessie was a sister figure, so was Pyronica. Queen...was like an aunt. But Wanda was very much like a mother. Miz hummed as she nuzzled Wanda. She missed having a mother. Ax hadn't seemed all big on the whole, finding Bill a mother thing… so… was this acceptable?
Wanda looked at her. "Do you want to go check on the kids and Seb before they burn something down in their excitement?"
Miz smiled widely. "Of course!" The two got out of bed and ran downstairs, content with each other's company. Wanda was happy to have Miz, it was weird she got used to thinking of her as a daughter considering she was MUCH older than her. She just couldn't help it! If Stanford hurt her she would chop his dick off! The two made it downstairs just in time to see a chicken breast go flying across the kitchen and splat against the wall. It slowly slid down the wall with a wet sound and Miz's eye twitched. There were potatoes spilled along the counter and floor, there were slices of bread spilled everywhere and Seb was staring at his wife and sister. "...I can fix it?" He squeaked.
The two glared at the guilty-looking Pines. Seb winced. "The twins did it! I tried to stop them!"
"Lies! Dad did it! He was playing with his magic!" The twins defended themselves.
"Get. Out." Miz whispered. "You three are grounded! Shoo!" Wanda scolded as dad and kids immediately ran away to hide. "We told you it was a bad idea to use magic!" Zach shook his head. "What!? You little- You were the ones who wanted to see me do it!" Seb argued with the twins. "At least Mom grounded you too." Zoe mumbled.
Seb scoffed at her. The disrespect! Of course he wasn't grounded! He was a grown man! They heard Wanda's voice from the other room "And yes! You're grounded too, Sebastian Pines!"
The twins laughed mockingly at their dad. ""You are grounded! You are grounded!"" They chanted as Seb moped with his legs drawn up to his chest. "What are you laughing at, little pests? You're grounded too!" Seb scowled. He didn't like when the twins laughed at him. Miz came out of the kitchen and glared at them. They stopped in their tracks and gulped. Slowly, Miz said "Go sit in the time out corner."
"""Nooooo!"""
-.-
"Day 437...We have been in the corner for almost a year now...I can't remember what civilization looks like…" Seb muttered, putting a six-fingered hand on the wall.
"We have no food...or water...our only chance of surwival is eating one of us...I wote we eat Zach…" Zoe sighed sadly. "What?! Why me?!" Zach stopped feigning death and looked at his dad and sister. Seb nodded sadly. "I'm sorry Zach, but you are the one we must eat to survive."
"You're the most new-tish-us." Zoe added. She and Seb nodded solemnly in unison while Zach gasped at them. "I can't believe you two are going to eat me!" The little boy wailed. He'd had nightmares if being eaten before! "I am sorry, son…" Seb grabbed Zach before he could get away and opened his mouth as wide as he could. Zach screamed loudly with tears in his eyes and bit Seb's arm in his panic. "Ah! Fuck!" Seb let the boy go and cradled his arm as Zach cried. "Mom! Dad and Zoe wanted to eat me!"
"For God's sake, you three can't stay put for more than 20 minutes?" Wanda called from the kitchen as she and Miz made dinner. "Don't scare my baby, Sebastian!" Wanda shook her head. He was lucky she loved him. Miz managed to clear off the kitchen via 'magic' to clean the ingredients so they could still be used. Wanda pan cooked the seasoned chicken breast while Miz cut up the potatoes into thin french fry shapes. A pot of oil was being heated in preparation for them. The little girl was humming as she worked. Wanda wasn't all that good of a cook, that was generally Sebastian's job, but she wanted to learn and Miz had been teaching her a lot.
"Don't bite, Zachary! Your teeth are like little needles!" Seb grimaced. Fuck, were his teeth like that as a child? No wonder the kids he bit had to be taken for stitches, it hurt! "Then don't try to eat me!" Zach pouted. Zoe groaned and started hitting her head against the wall. Seb stopped her. Didn't want her to give herself brain damage or anything. "Then what do we eaaatt? We've been hewe since, since forever!" She cried.
"It's barely 20 minutes." Wanda called out. Miz tutted "Hunger makes everything seem longer."
The Pines groaned and laid down on the floor, staring at the ceiling. Time out was lasting AGES! Seb made a cushion from the couch levitate from the couch to his spot and used it as a pillow. The twins did the same and they waited for dinner there, looking like stray puppies as they stared longingly at the kitchen. "Oh my god, you three are so overdramatic!" Wanda cast them a glance before rolling her eyes. Sir Bedazzle was nuzzling the twins and Seb, worried that they might be dying. "Arfk?" Sir Bedazzle barked. Zoe stared at him. "Hey...what if we eat Sir Bedazzle?"
"No!" Zach grabbed the acorn and shoved him under his shirt. "We're not eating Sir Bedazzle."
"Why not? He's...edible, no?" Seb continued teasing his son. Zach was so good and kind it made him and Zoe want to make him turn red with anger. Reminded him of Dipper...it was fun to piss him off. "No!" Zach whined and the acorn poked his 'head' out of Zach's shirt collar and smiled innocently. Zach pushed him back down. "Get him!" Zoe cried and threw herself over her brother to get Sir Bedazzle. "MOMMY!" Zach cried again.
"Fuck, what did I just say, Pines?!" The blonde cried in exasperation. She glared at Seb. "It was Zoe this time!" He grinned. At her unimpressed look, Sebastian wilted and groaned. "Zoe, sweetie, you can't eat our family pet." he said, just to attempt to sound like a responsible parent. Zoe pouted even as Sir Bedazzle poked his head out from Zach's collar to lick his face.
"Well, good news, idiots. Food's done." Miz laughed and the three hungry demons cheered as they scrambled to their feet. They slid into their chairs eagerly, the smell of food making them drool. "Shit, that smells great! What the fuck did you two do?!" Seb asked. Wanda blushed. "It was Miz's idea actually."
"I coated the chicken breasts in some herbs, a little olive oil and rubbed them with some garlic salt before letting Wanda cook them. The fries are also lightly tossed in herb oil and salt after frying. Then we toasted the bread in the pan that we cooked the chicken in so it soaked up all the juices and flavoring that came out when the chicken was cooking…" Miz explained.
She held up a bowl "Also, I made a salad...which you're probably not going to eat, but I put some dark leaf lettuce, tomatoes and goat cheese in your chicken sandwiches so at least you get SOME vegetables." She placed the bowl of salad down for Wanda. Unlike the rest of the family, Wanda didn't have a black hole for a stomach.
The twins started pulling out the vegetables from their sandwiches but Seb stopped them. "No, no, you are eating them, kids. And no buts." He warned. When it came to his children's well being, he totally transformed into a responsible parent. The twins pouted, yucky vegetables, but agreed because at least they got delicious fries and that didn't happen every day.
Miz sat down with them to eat and everyone ate happily, moaning at Miz's cooking. Zoe dared to say she was better than her Daddy and Seb got offended. Wanda knew she would never hear the end of it later. Oh God…
"Hee hee~" Miz teased. "Watch out Seb~I'm gonna steal your kids from you~" She took a bite of the chicken sandwich and sighed. Ahhh~she missed Earth spices so much! She wondered if she could take some of the herbs from Earth and reconstruct them back home and make Xin's farm planets grow them? She'd forgotten to do that last time. Especially Dill. Goddamn she missed Dill. She sighed. She missed home… she didn't actually manage to go back after all.
After dinner was finished, Seb took the children to the bathroom to help them take a bath while Wanda got her things ready for the next day. Miz flick-cleaned the kitchen with her powers because she was too tired to do it manually and loitered at the bathroom door. "Hey Seb?" Seb was taking the little kids out of the tub and wrapping them in their bathrobes when Miz entered. "Hey, what's up?" He pulled Zach's hood up to look at the bear ears it had.
"I'm going home."
Seb stopped and slowly looked at Miz. He glanced at the sleepy kids next to him. "Kids, wait for me in your room, I'll be there in a second, finish drying yourselves." They nodded, too tired to argue, and Seb was left with Miz. "You're...really leaving?"
"I'm not gonna be gone forever~" Miz rolled her eyes. "In fact I promised to meet with Ford tomorrow night, but, yeah. I need to go home and see my family...I...miss them…" She needed to go back and apologise for leaving. She rubbed one leg against the other "...also, while I lost my son and daughters...Ammy lost his brother and sisters. I...shouldn't have left him and everyone else. I mean, Pyronica lost her kids. Her ACTUAL kids...and here I was, selfishly thinking only of my own unhappiness…"
"You were not selfish, you were hurting too and you could have done something you would regret later…you needed time to heal..." Seb angrily blinked his tears away. "We will miss you." The man pouted. "Even if you stole my title as best chef…"
Miz laughed "I should be back by...tomorrow afternoon? Getting the timezones between dimensions right is always annoying." She hugged him. "Here's hoping you can survive tomorrow morning without me."
The man's eye widened. "So you won't leave for years this time...right?" Seb asked sheepishly. He… had been afraid that was what she'd meant by the fact that she was leaving. Miz hugged his stomach. "I'll try not to. Now that our doors are directly connected, I can get a better grasp on the timeflow here so I can input myself back into your lives with only a few hours of difference or so, best case scenario." Seb nodded and stroked her hair. "Alright, kid...tell your friends I said hi, and that I should be meeting them soon!" Miz nodded. "I'll say good-bye to the gremlins and Wanda first though!" She and Seb went off to the twin's room so they could help them change and say good night. The twins were horrified to hear Miz was leaving but calmed when they learned it was only for half a day. "So...you'll be here when we come home from school?" Zach asked. Seb groaned. Right. The school problem. Miz nodded. "I might be a bit late, a few days at worse, but I WILL come back."
"Promise it!" Zoe demanded. Miz sighed. "I promise that I will come back, even if I'm late, I will come back to see you all." She also created a letter telling Ford about her trip back to her own dimension, just so he wouldn't worry if the worse case scenario happened and she didn't make it back on time. She teleported the letter directly into his lab and knew he'd find it eventually.
The twins hugged the black-haired dragon one more time before Seb tucked them in. He had to read them a story, but they would have to wait until he said bye himself. Miz said bye to Wanda, reassured her that she would come back, and allowed her physical form to disperse. Wanda sighed. "Is it normal to have an adopted daughter who is secretly an all powerful demon god from another dimension?"
"Nope, but fuck normality." Seb leaned his head against Wanda's. "Do you think...we should officially adopt her? Like...for real?"
"You mean with official documents and everything?" Wanda pursed her lips. "Part of me wants to but...she doesn't age. And if she had papers, social services will wonder why she isn't going to school."
"Eh, we can have Miz take her graduation exam. She'll pass with flying colors."
"That's not the point." Wanda rolled her eyes. "She is still immortal. How would we explain that to people? Both her as Miz and her as Xin, they're fine for now but what about a year from now? 5 years? 10?"
Seb frowned. "Maybe we can ask Miz to shapeshift herself older?" Wait...if Miz had trouble with faces, she might not know how to make herself look like she was naturally aging. He had a feeling she could make herself 'old' but it would be a quick and sudden change as opposed to the gradual shift in age that normal humans went through. Well she seemed to be able to copy features from other people so...perhaps he and Ford could teach her how to copy off Mabel and Dipper and age as they did.
A conversation for another time. Seb read his children a story and kissed them both. For now, sleep. They had an early morning tomorrow. Seb was not looking forward to the talk he would need to have with the day care about pulling Zach and Zoe out. He also had to find an elementary school to enroll them in. Auuugh…
Wanda kissed him softly. "Worry about those things tomorrow. Come on." She led him to bed and he was slightly glad Miz wasn't here at the moment. He loved his friend/sister but tonight he just wanted to cuddle his wife. The two snuggled together under the sheets and fell asleep.
Miz went home! Dont worry, shell be back for future shenanigans! Please comment what you think!