Slices of Life and Family

by bluefrostyy

PART 3 of The life of Sebastian Pines! (Read that first, I doubt you'll understand what's going on) The story follows Seb's life after Gravity Falls. Bill was defeated, but the Pines family still have thousands of adventures together. Old characters will come back, new characters will make an appearance, all to accompany Seb through his journey as a human (Cowritten with Mizuuma)

38. Chapter 38 The season to be thankful

Hiii thank you for waiting! Hope you enjoy this chapter! Follow me on instagram as bluefrostyy! Im turning my AU into a comic xD

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The winter holidays were coming up. While they were all fine with just having a quiet Hanukkah celebration, Mabel wanted to have Christmas as well, not for religious reasons but because she wanted any excuse for more bedazzlement and decorations.

They all agreed to meet up for Christmas together after Hanukkah was finished on the 10th. This year, 2018, Hanukkah began on the 2nd. The twins were excited to show their big sister all about Hanukkah, since she'd never celebrated it before.

"This is the menorah!" Zoe explained proudly, pointing at the candle stick holder. "It's really pretty, and we light the candles every night, one everynight and so on, until Hanukkah ends. Also! Hanukkah starts when the sun goes down tonight."

"We also play with the dreidels." Zach added, holding up the tops. "And we put stuff into a pot and if you spin the dreidel and it lands on this squiggle," he showed Miz one of the sides of the top displaying ג, "Then you win all the items in the pot!"

"So… what do we put in the pot?" Miz asked. "Candy!" "Money!" the twins answered. "But we like candy more." Zoe nodded solemnly. Miz giggled, "Are we allowed to put whatever into the pot?"

The twins looked at each other and shrugged. "I mean, I guess so?" Zoe tilted her head. "What'd you wanna put in it?"

"More food?" Miz grinned, making the twins groan. "We're already getting food though." Zach told her. "We make donuts with jelly. And potato pancakes!" "Yeah! And fried dough! And french fries! And other fried stuff!" Zoe cackled. Because apparently you have to fry the food, or at least, that's what daddy said. Mommy said you didn't have to fry all the food, but daddy liked to play with the deep fryer.

"We can also decorate the house. But mommy says that's too much trouble, especially since we're not having a big party with everyone coming over." Zach shrugged. He didn't personally mind, because cleaning up the decorations was a lot of work. "But we can make some decorations if you want?" he asked Miz.

"Hm… parties need decorations… though we don't need too many…" Miz tilted her head in thought. "Oh! What if we make origami star of davids?" The twins gasped. ""Yes!"" they cheered. And the three of them sat down with plenty of paper as Miz walked them through the steps to fold them. The twins were getting better with their manual dexterity, since Miz was slowly teaching them simple origami designs. They could already make (somewhat lopsided) cranes, pigs, turtles and goldfish.

Zach really enjoyed it. It felt familiar for some reason, how he sort of 'knew' sometimes, where a fold should go. Yeah, Phillip had showed them some of this before, but something about folding paper, sitting beside Miz, felt… right. He shrugged it off, just enjoying the peaceful time with his sisters. At least it was peaceful until Zoe set the paper on fire, cackling madly.

"Should we invite Amanda?" Zach asked that night during dinner. His parents raised their eyebrows. "What do you mean?" Seb asked.

"I mean…" Zach wiggled in his seat. "Missus Carol doesn't let us play with Amanda anymore. And I miss her." Zoe nodded. "Yeah! It's not fair that Amanda can't come over to play with us anymore!"

Miz hummed. "Yeah, that's not fair at all." she decided. Wanda sighed as she filled their cups with more milk. "I know it's not fair, but we can't really force Carol to let Amanda play with you. We can ask, but if she says no, we… technically can't do anything about it."

"I still want to sue Carol." Seb muttered. Wanda sighed. "As do I, but that would only cause problems for Amanda too."

"That's why I just cursed Carol." Miz said brightly. Wanda groaned. "Still not a good way of dealing with this problem. You shouldn't go around cursing people just because you think they deserve it."

"What if they do deserve it?" Miz mumbled. Wanda sighed. "And how would you decide what is or isn't something deserving?"

"I'll ask other people next time, and get their opinion." Miz shrugged. Wanda sighed. "Has cursing her made her any more pleasant? Has it fixed anything?"

Miz looked down, rather frustrated. "No." she looked back up at Wanda. "How do I get Carol to stop being a meanie?"

"That's…" Wanda rubbed her face. "You can try talking to her? I don't know how much good it would do, but… sometimes, people are mean because they don't know better."

"Doesn't matter how little she knows, making a child cry on their birthday is wrong. And continuing to insult and belittle him is also wrong." Miz grumbled. Hard to believe that was almost a year ago. Hard to believe she'd been with the Pines for almost a year. "You cursed her because you were angry," Wanda told Miz simply. "And that's wrong. Lashing out because you're angry isn't good."

"I don't like her." Miz glared. "It doesn't matter. It's very rude to curse someone just because you don't like them. She's a horrible person, yes. But she wasn't attacking you-"

"She was MENTALLY ATTACKING Zach!" Miz snarled. Wanda had to pause at that. Well, yes. Carol was. "And has your curse done anything to make Carol stop being mean? Has it done anything other than spite her for your own satisfaction?"

"Well then what should I do? Why can't we just sue her?" Miz complained.

"We don't have anything for a real case. She was rude and mean but she hasn't… physically attacked us." Wanda sighed. "Can't we start a case about her mistreating Amanda?"

"Domestic cases like that are difficult." Wanda explained. "And it would distress Amanda if we went after her family in such a way." After all, Carol was still her mother. Wanda was sure that Amanda still loved her mother.

Miz sat back, thinking, then she gave Zach and Zoe a 'look' which they nodded at once they understood. Wanda narrowed her eyes at them. "You're planning something, aren't you?"

"Whaaaa? Nooo~" Miz gave her an 'innocent' smile. Wanda didn't let up her suspicious stare. Miz wiggled in her seat. "I was gonna contact Amanda and see about helping her sneak out of her house to come over to hang out!"

Wanda blinked. "Well. As long as you're not kidnapping her. If she agrees to come over, in secret." Because Wanda really didn't like the idea of Amanda being 'trapped' over there. So… well, kids snuck out all the time, sure, they were kindergarteners, but still!

"Don't get caught." was what Wanda finally told them. Miz cackled. See? This was why she loved Wanda so much. She and the twins grinned at each other, they would work on battle strategies later. Seb blinked. Whaaat just happened? He lost them at cursing Carol. "Are we cursing Carol more?"

The twins groaned. "Pay attention to the plans!" Zach scolded him and Seb flinched back a little. Geez!

Miz, Zach and Zoe were crouched outside Amanda's window. Were they trespassing on private property? Fuck yeah! But there weren't any cops around so it was totally legal.

Miz was staring into the house as her eyes flickered. "Carol's in her room, other side of the house. Not asleep yet. So we need to do this quietly." She whispered to the twins.

Zoe nodded and was gonna float Zach up until Miz stopped her. "No magic! Remember? We're not supposed to show off magic in front of non-family or non-cryptids. Use your thief skills!" she whispered.

Zoe rolled her eyes and crouched to get Zach on her shoulders. "Get up dummy!"

Zach pouted, but obeyed his twin and, with a bit of trouble, managed to put a knee on the window frame. (Miz was spot checking them the whole time.) From there it was easy for him to get inside. Miz and Zoe waited for the signal.

Meanwhile, Amanda blinked at the blond on her floor. "Zach? Wha..What?" He shushed her. "My family is celebrating Hanukkah, and I know you're not Jewish, but its just games and food, and um…" Zach gave her a shy smile. "We miss you, missus Carol never lets you play with us anymore. And that's not fair. So… do you wanna sneak out to come over?"

Amanda didn't even hesitate. "Yes!" She whisper shouted. Zach grinned right back. Amanda and Zach piled some of Amanda's dolls on her bed and threw the blankets over it, like they saw in movies. Amanda got her shoes on (since she kept hers beside her bed instead of out near the front doors, like a heretic) and the two crawled out the window, where Miz caught them and put them on the ground. It was rather chilly, and Miz took out the spare jacket from Zoe that she brought and wrapped Amanda in it. The four giggled quietly and ran off.

(And if Miz placed a Perception Filter over Amanda's bed in case Carol came to check on her, well… not like anyone was here to tell her 'no'.)

Amanda's heart was racing. She was disobeying her mom, but she didn't care. She missed hanging out with her best friends.

She still didn't really get why her mom was so angry. If Zach wanted to be a boy, what was wrong with that? Missus Honey at school said they could be whatever they wanted after all.

She took off her shoes at the door at the Pines's house, they explained about how it made Miz feel more comfortable, and Amanda didn't mind.

"Well, well well well! Look who just escaped her prison." Seb grinned down at the little girl.

Amanda laughed. "It's not a prison, Mr. Seb!"

Sebastian waved a hand. "Yeah, yeah, whatever, kid. You want some food?"

"What is?" She pouted. Seb rolled his eye. Right. Little kid. "We have rice and yummy meat!"

"Umm, ok!"

So they all sat down for a late night snack. Technically, Amanda was supposed to be in bed already and not eating, but mommy didn't give her dinner tonight, because today was one of those 'partial fasting' days for a 'diet'. Amanda didn't really get it, she was hungry. But mommy said that sometimes you shouldn't eat, or else you would get fat and ugly. Amanda didn't like it when mommy talked about things like that. She wasn't sure it was correct, but mommy made her and daddy go along with her diets. Mommy tried out all sorts of different diets. Amanda didn't like them much.

When the plate of rice, veggies and sliced meat was placed in front of her, Amanda's mouth watered. She was 'cheating' mommy's diet, but she didn't care. She was hungry.

As the child ate, Miz leaned against Seb. "See? I told you we needed to get her some food."

"Ok fine." Seb huffed, not liking admitting defeat. But at least Amanda was eating, she was leaving the veggies, like he expected from a 5 year old, but she was a guest and he wouldn't force her to eat them.

The three kids then went to the twin's room to play and have fun like little kids should do, without hate in between. "Did you leave a perception filter." Seb asked Miz absently.

"Yup!" "Good demon girl." Seb ruffled her hair affectionately.

They had to sneak Amanda back to her own bed after she and the twins got too sleepy, but they promised they would continue to meet up in secret, because they wouldn't allow Carol to stop them from being friends.

They couldn't take Amanda with them to Gravity Falls for the Christmukkah with the rest of the Pines though. Which was sad. But the twins gave her lots of hugs on their last day before they had to leave.

This time, it was Ford's turn to receive everybody. He managed to convince the other residents of his house to help him clean everything and set up the extra rooms he had added as their tradition of meeting for holidays and birthdays suddenly became a thing. (Miz insisted vehemently on it.) Of course, Seb and his family were the first to arrive, they lived a few hours away from Gravity Falls after all. The town looked so different in winter. It was really cold, and the forest looked even creepier than normal without all the green leaves.

Seb jumped out of the car and excitedly ran towards the house as the twins, Miz and Wanda got their bags out of the trunk. "Sixer! We're here!" He shouted and Soos opened the door.

"Sebastian, dude!"

"SOOS!" Seb laughed and threw himself over the big man for a hug. The two friends squeezed each other before Soos looked over at the rest of the family. "Hey dudes. Little dudes." He laughed. Miz waved "Hi Question Mark!" She looked around before shrugging and levitating the luggage. They were spending a week in Gravity Falls for the holidays.

Wanda gave Soos a hug and the twins ran towards him to hug him as well. He was really huggable! Seb dragged Miz closer to him. "Question Mark, Miz. Miz, Question Mark, aka Soos. She's our adopted daughter. She also has powers, cool, huh?" He introduced, not knowing Soos had met her already.

"Of course! Hello." He didn't realize Sebastian adopted the other Bill. It made sense that he would adopt her. That's good. Soos knew that Seb was a good guy. He'll take care of this little triangle dudette. "Nice to see you again." He held out his hand for a shake, his large palm easily covering her entire hand. "Soos! Get everyone inside, it's freezing!" Melody called from the door with her hands on her hips. Her belly was showing clearly already and Sebastian made adorable little jumps after seeing her, he was so excited.

"Coming!" Soos called before addressing the Pines. "Come on, dudes! We made hot chocolate!"

"YEAH!" The twins and Miz roared before running inside. "Miz! No chocolate!" Wanda called after her. As they got in the house with Soos helping them carry their bags, Seb looked around. "Where's Ford?" Soos shrugged. "Haven't seen Dr. Pines since this morning. He mentioned something about how the weirdness levels always seem to elevate around this time of year and has been in his lab all day."

Seb rolled his eyes. Working on his passion, Seb couldn't blame him, but still. He should have at least come out to receive them. How rude.

"Come on, kids! Let's go to your temporary rooms to put your stuff in there." Wanda called to the twins, who skipped after her, laughing excitedly. Their Pines family meetings were always the best. Mom's family was cool too...but their big sister wasn't allowed to be all weird and magical around them.

Seb turned to Melody and hugged her. "How's life with Mr. Mystery going, kid?" The woman chuckled. "Really good, Mr. Pines. It's lots of fun."

"Sooo~ how's it feel to be a father soon~?" Seb teased. "I'm so happy I'm getting niblings!" Soos blushed even as he rubbed his head. "I'm just worried I won't be a good dad, dude."

"Shush. You're the greatest man in the world." Melody kissed him. "And you'll be a good father. I know you will. You helped take care of kids all the time." She hugged his arm "And I know you would love our children more than anything in the world."

Seb squealed loudly. SHIP, SHIP, SHIP! He knew they would make a great couple~ "Having kids is really weird, but you'll love them! Even if they're little monsters, HAH!" As if on cue, the two little demons came running down the stairs and threw themselves over their dad, each one of them hugging his legs. "We unpacked!" They informed Seb who congratulated them. "Can we go see the monsters in Uncle Sixer's lab?" Zoe asked excitedly.

"Uncle Ford doesn't work with monsters...anymore." Seb mumbled the last part. "But we can go bother him!" "Yay!" the twins squealed before they ran for the research center, (Miz and Wanda were putting the bags away), leaving Soos and Melody shaking their heads. Pines...

Seb took the kids to his brother's lab, walking around the center as if he owned the place (after getting their visitor's badges) or had any right to be in a restricted research center of the state, but had the decency to knock on the door. Max was there ("Hiiii Maxini!" "Hello, great dragon."), looking too shy to do so himself despite coming over to try and tell Ford his family was here. "Fooorddsieee~ Your dear family came to viissiittt!" Seb called. There was a shuffling sound before a frazzled Ford opened the door. Seb blinked and reared back. "Yeesh! When was the last time you slept?!" Max gasped, "Were you there all night?"

"AAhh! Zombie uncle!" Zach screamed and the two blonds hid behind their dad. Ford rubbed his eyes and blinked at Seb. "Seb? Wha-what are you doing here?" He'd been working since last night, and Max hadn't realized his teacher had stayed overnight in his lab.

"Um, I don't know, maybe visiting for Christanukkah? I don't know, MAYBE. Because then I don't know why all our family is coming between today and tomorrow..." Seb exclaimed sarcastically. Ford groaned loudly. "Fuck…." he lost track of time. Miz came by on the weekends, so he tended to get absorbed in his work over the week and lose track of time without her here to remind him. And Max had put their lessons on hold to spend more time with Mabel, who was complaining about her uncle stealing her boyfriend. ("Besides, I can teach him human stuff too!")

"Yeah. Fuck. Come on. You have to sleep. Kids, help me." He grabbed Ford and picked him up to make it look like he was actually holding him, but the kids were keeping him floating with their minds. "Wait...but, my research…" Ford pouted as his journals and notes stayed unattended on his desk. Seb closed the door and they walked back to the house. "It can wait. You gotta sleep. Remember what happens when you don't sleep?" Ford sighed. "Yes. I know." he rubbed his eyes.

Seb shook his head. He should have asked Miz to go check on Ford. She had been too busy with the holidays. She wanted to get the decorations and presents together. Christmas was just a bonus holiday for them but Mabel and Miz seemed to have the same idea about it.

"Why don't you sleep, Uncle Ford?" Zach asked. "I like sleeping because my mommy and dad tuck me in and I'm really warm. You don't sleep because you don't have anyone to tuck you in?"

Seb laughed. "You know, kid? I think that might be the problem...besides, your uncle is kinda dumb." He made a show of looking Ford up and down. "That's it. I'm sending Miz to tuck you in for bed, young man."

"Hey…'m older...Don't need..." Ford mumbled sleepily and the twins laughed at him. They carried him back to the house and everyone stared at the Pines carrying a half-unconscious Ford inside. "Happy holidays. We brought a dumb genius." Seb announced.

"And he comes with extra detachable fingers!" Zoe exclaimed mirthfully. "No, no he doesn't." Seb lifted his brother's hands away from his daughter in case she tried something. Miz shook her head in fond exasperation. Ford must have gotten hyper focused on something again. "I'll tuck him into bed." She said and blinked in confusion when Seb and the twins laughed. Ford protested sleepily as Miz floated him to his bedroom. "Come on, sleepytime."

The three Pines waved at Ford who floated away. He bumped his head against a wall, but barely protested. "Daddy, when is Diego coming?" Zach asked excitedly and Seb hummed in thought. "Well...I think Diego and his family are coming today afternoon, or tomorrow morning."

"And Mabel should be here by the afternoon as well." Max grinned, already anticipating it.

("I'm inviting Amelie as well. But she won't be here until tomorrow." Miz reminded them, her voice somehow reaching them despite the fact that she wasn't in the room. And Seb also realized Miz was using her powers even under the unicorn barrier. Huh, did she figure out a way around it?)

"What!? But why are they taking so long?!" Zoe moaned and threw herself to the floor, hitting her head against the wood and not even protesting. Seb winced. "They live further away."

"They should move closer…" Zoe complained. Wanda made her stand up and told them Melody was serving hot chocolate, which made the kids quickly run to the kitchen. "So...Miz will tuck Ford in from now on, huh?" She asked as she walked over to Seb. He pulled her closer and hugged her. "Apparently…"

"This...is...ridiculous…" Ford protested as he was manhandled around with magic. "Let me go!" He whined tiredly. Miz giggled as she dropped him onto his bed. "Obviously, you need a nap. You've been working too hard." She took his glasses off and placed them neatly on the desk. "Come on. Do you want me to sing you to sleep?" Ford mumbled "I'm not...baby…" he was half asleep already. Woe, he really overdid it, didn't he? Ashton would be worried.

"Suuuure~you're not. Ugh. You need to brush your teeth...but you need sleep more." Miz frowned at his rank breath. "Can I clean you with magic?" She asked. Ford blinked. "Oh, sure."

"Boom! You're clean now." She flicked her fingers and Ford shivered as he felt a burning heat rush through his whole body, leaving him feeling fresh and...cleaned. "Huh, that's useful." he wondered how he could recreate such a thing. Some sort of ring he could pass through that could clean him off near instantly. It would be super convenient and helpful-

"Shh...no talk, no work, sleep now." Miz pulled the covers over him and Ford nodded off. Miz waited to hear him begin to breathe evenly before nodding to herself and going back to the rest of the family.

The twins were sadly staring at the christmas tree, which only had some presents. They had brought gifts for the family, but they were just five, they still believed in Santa and were waiting for HIS extra presents..

(Ok, Santa WAS actually real, but that wasn't the point.)

"What's up with the sad faces, kiddos?" She asked her siblings and they sighed. "We want Santa to come already…" Zoe pouted and rested her head on Sir Bedazzle's tummy.

"Oh yes~ Santa will deliver the presents, right?" She smiled and the little kids nodded. Miz looked over at Seb and raised an eyebrow. Seb shook his head with a pleading look. He didn't want to spoil the twin's belief in Santa. They will realize it on their own when they were older but he didn't want them to find out so soon.

(And that's when Miz realized that Sebastian didn't believe in Santa. Well, fair's fair. Santa never visited anyone anymore so it's no wonder people didn't believe in him anymore.)

Miz nodded and ruffled their curls. "Well, we can't forget to leave him cookies and milk, right?" She asked and the twins shook their heads quickly. "He needs them to have energy to continue handing out gifts to every kid in the world!" Zoe exclaimed. Zach nodded his head. "That's why he's so fat, so he can stay warm, and that's how he is."

The adults and Miz rolled their eyes and continued chilling around. At some point, while Seb helped make lunch (Wanda wanted to help but her dear husband kissed her forehead and kicked her out of the kitchen. She felt offended. Her cooking skills had improved during the years! But Seb wanted to have the kitchen right now), the kids asked to go play in the snow so Wanda and Miz accompanied them outside. Miz started rolling a snowball as the twins had their snowball fight. Miz hummed to herself as she rolled the ball larger and larger. Wanda tried to keep an eye on all her kids. "Are you making a snowman?" She asked.

Miz nodded. She missed the snow, it reminded her of when she first met Hectorgon. "It's fun!" The demon smiled. "I like playing in the snow, sometimes I take my friends to cold planets with snow so we can have a snow day." She casually mentioned. Wanda couldn't help but feel a little off balance by Miz's casual space travel.

It was still jarring to really think about how her daughter was an alien. She could pass for human most of the time.

Zoe threw her snowball so hard it knocked her brother backwards, and she ran towards him, giggling softly. Giggling because it was funny, but softly because if Zach got hurt and accused her, she could be in trouble. "I'm sorry." She apologized and helped the boy stand up. Zach shook himself and grinned. "I'm fine!"

The twins giggled but frowned when they heard a noise, like a trashcan falling. They shared a look and rounded the corner to see what caused the noise. A little head with a beard and a red pointy hat poked out of the trashcan, making Zoe scream loudly. Wanda and Miz heard the girl screaming and ran after them to check, but found Zach pummeling something with snowballs he scooped up with his mind. "Die, little man!" (The twins had been practicing with their powers.)

"Ah! Help! Mercy!" The person screamed. Miz blinked. "Is that a gnome?"

"I think so…" Wanda said in awe. From the times she had come to Gravity Falls, she had been (un)lucky not to encounter any supernatural creatures. "Zach, leave the gnome alone, he's just stealing food to survive." Miz ordered and the kid pouted but obeyed. The gnome shook himself like a dog and glared at them. "What's your problem?" He sniffed the air. "Hey, your energy is familiar…" He mused to himself as he looked at the human kids. "Do I know you?"

"No, but you scared me." Zoe pouted. "You're weird." She said and Wanda frowned. "Zoe! That's not nice!" The gnome scoffed. "Look in a mirror, kid. You're a real weirdo yourself." He turned and ran back into the forest. "That was unnecessarily rude." Miz said. Zoe's lower lip wobbled. Zach stuck his tongue at the direction the gnome ran to and hugged his sniffling sister. "Don't listen to that ugly, little man." He comforted her.

"Come on, help me make the snowman." Miz gently steered her siblings away from the trashcan and back to her forming snowball. "I think a three stack snowman would be cool right?" She suggested. The twins nodded. "I want to make the head!" Zoe said.

Wanda sat on the porch as her kids played. She was freezing~ But they were having fun, so she could deal with a little bit of cold. Seb watched them from the window and grinned. Aaw, he wanted to play too~ Why did they have to make food? Stupid bodies needing food!

Miz finished the largest snowball for the base and helped Zach lift his torso onto it. Then she placed Zoe's head piece on top and carefully packed more snow in place to make it stay together. "Alright. Who wants to find sticks and rocks?"

"We want!" The twins giggled and ran into the forest to find some sticks. Wanda stood up and went after them. "Kids, don't go too deep into the forest, remember?"

""Ok"" They said at unison as they looked at the floor, picking the stuff they considered appropriate. "Miz, can we find a hat for the snowman too?" Zach asked adorably and his older sister squeezed his cheeks. "Sure! But first sticks." She giggled. They gathered a lot of sticks and began picking out which ones were best. This one had too many tiny branches coming off it, that one still had some pine leaves. Finally they found two nice sized sticks that they all agreed on. Miz carefully inserted the sticks and sent the kids to go find rocks or anything else to make the face with.

They found rocks and soon enough, their snowman was done! "Mommy! Look! We finished!" Zoe exclaimed proudly as she pulled at her mom's hand. Wanda chuckled. "I can see it. How about going inside now?" Zach examined the snowman, humming. "He is still missing his hat!" He gasped. "What if he needs it to be alive?!" He went over to Miz and tugged on her jacket. "You have a top hat right?"

Miz blinked. "Oh. I guess so." She materialized her top hat and handed it to her brother. Zach ran over to place the final accessory onto their snowman. They all admired it. They used a pinecone for the nose. Zoe giggled. "The nose looks like uncle Stan's." They all laughed. "Or uncle Ford. Or Daddy. They have the same nose." Zach pointed out. Miz grinned and materialized a pair of glasses. "There. Now it looks like Ford." She placed the glasses on the snowman and the three devolved into laughter.

"Let's get more stuff from Uncle Ford!" Zoe squealed. Miz hummed and materialized a red journal with a six-fingered hand on it. It was empty but the cover was just like his old journal they threw into the bottomless pit years ago. She grinned as she moved the stick until it could hold the false journal. The three laughed at the snowFord. Miz grinned. "Hey, I just thought of something." The twins leaned in, eager to hear about their big sister's fun idea. "Ok, since Ford is tucked away in his room, when everyone else gets here, we tell them that Ford messed with some weirdness and got turned into a snowman!"

The twins gasped before bursting into loud giggles. "Yes! Let's do it! Let's do it!" The blond kids chanted. Wanda was checking her phone, unaware of the evil deeds her children were planning. Miz got a coat and put it on the snowman as the twins carefully put more snow over the snowFord's head to make hair.

"There! Mom, we're done, can we get back inside now?" Miz asked and the blonde nodded distractedly. "Ok, take off your wet boots before entering though."

The siblings giggled madly as they ran inside, eager to put their plan into action. They went to the living room, and after a few christmas movies were played, Mabel announced her presence. "LOOK WHO'S BACK INTO TOWN?!" She roared followed by a loud "Oink!"

""Waddles!"" the kids squealed as they ran to hug the pig. Mabel pouted. "Wha? You guys love Waddles more than me?!" the three grinned at her as they hugged the pig. "Yup!"

Mabel made a dramatic show of being offended and hurt. "Well, I can see when I'm unwanted!" She gasped and fell to the ground with a loud "No one loves me!" The twins went over to pet her head and back. "No! We were kidding! We do love you!" Waddles walked over to Mabel and snorted softly, nudging her with his snout. The teen dragged her cousins closer and hugged them.

Dipper entered the living room carrying his and Mabel's bags with a pout. "Ugh. Mabel! You can't keep sticking me with your stuff!" He complained. Pacifica, who was invited over for the holidays, snorted. "It's that, or you leave it in the snow outside." Dipper rolled his eyes. "She's lucky I'm such a nice brother."

"Mabel!" Max heard her voice and bounded into the room, wiggling with utter joy. He was going to celebrate Christmukkah, or Hannumas with her. Max and her had been seeing each other a few days every few weeks, as both were busy. But now he was going to get a whole week with her! He leaned towards her and kissed her lips in greeting. He even counted the seconds so Mabel could breathe again.

"This is the first winter I'm not sleeping!" Max laughed loudly, practically bouncing up and down. "I'm so excited to do another human tradition!"

"And I'm excited to have a partner for a human tradition!" Mabel exclaimed back.

"I want to show you my notes! Math smells like pineapple, English like apple, science like mint!" Max dragged a jumping Mabel away. "Also, I've tried these fruits! And they're the best!"

Dipper and Pacifica blinked before laughing sheepishly. "Totally made for each other."

"Has the kid been drinking coffee?" Shermie watched them go. It seemed like it… "Eh, whatever, I'm getting some eggnog." And Shermie went off to the kitchen.

Speaking of coffee… "Where's uncle Ford?" Dipper looked around. Miz and the twins glanced at each other before putting on sad expressions. "He had an...accident…" Miz said sadly.

"What?!" Dipper and Mabel gasped (Pacifica raised an eyebrow, easily seeing the lie). The blonde twins nodded. "H-he was playing with us in the snow and then...said that...there was a...a…" Zoe mumbled. "A magic snowflake!" Zach said. The three nodded. "And he said that he HAD to study it…" the three sniffled. "So he messed with it and then...and then…" Zach's lips trembled as he couldn't continue (because he had to hold back his laughter). Miz took over "And then he got turned into a snowman." She sighed. She wasn't good at lying, but she could bullshit up a story quite easily. All that remained was for people to be so invested in the story that they believed her.

And THIS Dipper and Mabel were pretty naïve (they fell for Seb's terrible lies after all). Hm. Might be a problem, should probably have Stan sit them down and teach them how to tell when she was bullshitting…

And Pacifica quickly caught onto what Miz was doing. And she rolled her eyes, please. That was SO fake. Who would ever fall for something like-

Dipper gasped. "Noo! What-?! Where is he?!" He demanded. (And Pacifica face palmed at her gullible boyfriend.) The kids took his hand and led him over to the back door and pointed at the very Ford-looking snowman in the backyard. "I think it'll wear off on its own. I didn't want to mess with it." Miz shrugged. The teen covered his mouth with his hands in shock. "Oh man…how long do you think it will last?!" The kids and Miz shrugged. Miz was hoping Ford slept the entire day. "Probably until tomorrow, most basic curses and spells wear off unless some kinda trigger is set." (And Max was confused, because he just saw Ford earlier… and Miz poked his side and whispered, "I'm playing a prank." to him. Max didn't really get it, but when Miz asked him to keep quiet for now, he agreed. Because the great dragon asked him to.)

Dipper walked over to the snowFord and knelt in front of it. "Uncle Ford, I told you, you have to be careful with weirdness! Don't worry, we'll make sure nothing happens to you!" He cried. The blond twins and Miz snorted with muffled laughter. Pranks!

Mabel was tugging on her hair. "This is awful." she turned to Miz (who immediately put on a sad expression) "Does uncle Seb know?" Miz shook her head. "Everyone else thinks that Ford is asleep in his room. I don't want them to know because what if Seb decides it's too dangerous to have the winter holidays here?" Mabel and Dipper nodded. Seb WAS over protective of them.

"So we can't let the grown ups know." Zoe said. Miz sniffed and patted snowFord's cheek. "I even got him a fake journal...that way...at least it still looks like him so we wouldn't mistake him for some other snowman…"

The older twins had downcast expressions as well. They hoped their uncle would be alright. Mabel stroked his coat. "Don't worry, after this, we will keep you super warm so you aren't cold as ice ever again." The little twins and Miz were doing everything in their power to not cry with laughter and ruin everything. Pacifica had her head thrown back with a silent groan. Ok, she was gonna see how long it took for them to figure out they were being pranked.

"Mabel! Mason! You left your bags everywhere!" Abigail scolded her twins from the door with a serious look. Dipper groaned as his mom said his name, but he and Mabel said some reassuring words to the snowman before they all went inside.

The blond twins and Miz high-fived. This was going to be fun.

(They were really awful, all three of them.)

"Ahaha! That snowman looks like Ford!" Stan laughed uproariously when he arrived and spotted the snowman. The older twins sweated while the younger twins grinned innocently. "Yup. We built it." Zoe said. "So you better not touch it." Miz placed her hands on her hips and glared at Stan. He ruffled her hair and chuckled. "No worries, kids. I ain't the kinda guy to destroy someone's snowman."

"You better! This snowman is very special to us!" Mabel shouted and Stan rolled his eyes. Weird kid. Dillon and Diego ran towards their cousins after saying hi to everyone. "It really looks like Uncle Ford!" The older teen mentioned and Dillon giggled. "Let's make more!" He said as he picked up snow with his gloved hands.

The little twins gave a pained sigh as Miz motioned the brothers to come closer. "There's...something we should tell you." She said as Dipper and Mabel sniffled. Diego gasped when he heard about what had happened to 'uncle Ford'. Dillon easily saw through the ruse but decided to play along for shits and giggles. If Mabel and Dipper were naive enough to fall for it, he wanted to see how this went down.

(The awful squad now consisted of four people. Pacifica sighed.)

"We should stay outside, to watch him in case something happens…" Dipper suggested while Mabel and Diego nodded quickly. Dillon groaned a bit. "He'll be fine~ It's cold outside!" Majority won though, the little twins and Miz also agreed to stay outside (to keep up the act), and they stayed on the porch, wrapped up in a blanket and drinking the hot chocolate Melody and her kind soul decided to bring them.

Stan and Shermie were ordered to help and were washing the dirty pans and pots as Seb cooked. Wanda, who wasn't watching over their children anymore, helped. "Why isn't Ford helping as well? I know he doesn't know how to cook...but he should be doing something!" Shermie whined.

"He was sleep-deprived so I sent him to sleep for a bit. A sleep-deprived Ford is a weird in a bad way Ford. If we hadn't come, he wouldn't have slept until Christmas, and that is a whole week away." Seb huffed. Abigail and Carla entered the kitchen carrying more plates. They were a larger group now so more of them were needed. "Does someone know why the kids outside on the porch? They're gonna freeze out there." Carla frowned.

"I think they're making snowmen?" Stan suggested. The adults decided this wasn't all that important and started talking about their kids. They proudly talked about their kids at college or at kindergarten and laughed at the age difference. Wanda said Zoe had started athletic classes seriously on weekends which was supposed to help her control her energy. She didn't like gymnastics as much as Zach did, so they went to different classes at the gym. Miz didn't much like the fun, but she loved the rock climbing wall just as much as Seb did. (The only problem was that she'd climb up and then get too scared to come back down without using her powers. Seb had to go up and rescue her multiple times.)

Diego wanted nothing to do with boxing, but Stan had insisted he had to practice a sport so he was trying swimming, much to Stan's sadness who wanted him to choose football or baseball.

"He 'doesn't want to get hurt'! Can you believe this child?" Stan grumbled. Seb rolled his eye. "Diego is a sweet child who's not a muscle nut like you." He turned to Wanda "And then there's Zoe, who will pick a fight with anyone if given the chance." Wanda sighed. "Where does she get it from?" Everyone gave Seb a flat look. He frowned. "I didn't pick fights! I just defended myself or Ford when we got bullied...I wouldn't have if I knew how to give a good left hook…" Seb muttered to himself.

"Miz is trying karate classes in her free time. She's doing fine. She likes it better than Judo for self defense because they don't learn grapple holds or that sort of thing. Those still scare her a little."

Everyone hummed, not really thinking too deep into it. "She'll get used to it." Stan finally declared with a reassuring smile. "There, I finished my part." He put the last plate away just as more dirty pans and utensils were put in the sink. "That's yours, Shermie!" Stan quickly said as he ran out of the room.

"Oh, what!?" The youngest brother groaned in despair at more work.

Eventually, lunch was ready and the adults set the table in the living room for them, having in mind to send the kids to the kitchen. Kari, who had been helping and watching them interact with an amused grin, went to get the cousins camping in the cold. "Kids, lunch is ready, get inside before you get frostbite!" She scolded lightly. "Food!" Miz pulled her siblings along as she ran back inside. Mabel, Dipper and Diego looked worried about leaving 'Ford' alone but Dillon rolled his eyes and steered them indoors. "Come on, my fingers are gonna freeze off."

"Do you think he's hungry?" Diego pouted and Dillon ruffled his hair. Aww, why was Diego so kind? He didn't deserve to be lied to like this! "I'm sure he isn't, and if he is, when he's back to normal we'll give him a lot of food, ok?" Diego trusted his older brother's words and went inside the house.

Mabel ran into the living room to look for Max. He was curled up on the couch, huddled in a blanket someone wrapped around him, and she carefully woke him up. The caffeine crash had knocked him out.

Seb grinned at them before pointing at the kitchen. "You nine, kitchen. Kids' table is there."

Pacifica and Max blinked. The what now? The brunet twins and Dillon crossed their arms. "Nah-ah! We deserve to be in the adult's table now!" Dipper complained. "Yeah! We finished school and we're studying in college!" Seb narrowed his eye. "Do you do taxes?" The teens sighed. "No."

"When you pay your own taxes and stuff, call me. Now, you have your own table and we made dinosaur nuggets for you~" Mabel pushed the two boys away as she ran to the kitchen. "DINO NUGGETS!" She squealed. The boys sighed. Well, at least one of them was happy to be at the kids' table.

Miz was squeezing out the ketchup for the kids. Zoe was biting off a dinosaur's head and laughing as the ketchup dripped down the sides of her mouth. "Mwahaha!" She laughed. Miz wiped her face off. "Don't eat with your mouth open, that's gross." She scolded. Zach was more neat, nibbling off the dinosaur's limbs in a little circle before finally eating their body. Everything with his eyes closed. He could sometimes blink them open for a few seconds, but he was just more comfortable eating with his eyes closed.

Miz also ate her nuggets in this way, biting off the limbs and nibbling around them until only the torso was left. She then popped the torso in her mouth. Neither Zach nor Miz noticed the similarity.

Mabel sat next to Diego and the child froze, staring at Dillon for help. Luckily, Mabel was distracted adding ketchup to her own nuggets. The two boys sat down as well with their cousins. Well, the kids' table wasn't that bad. Even when they wanted to feel mature and stuff, they always got delicious food at this table. The adults were probably eating just vegetables. Dipper searched around for a juice box and opened it to serve everybody.

As everyone ate, he looked at the window and sighed. "I feel bad for eating when Uncle Ford can't…" He poked a dinosaur with a small pout.

The blond twins giggled behind their hands, accidentally smearing ketchup and mayo over their faces. Miz sighed and cleaned them off again. Dillon simply rolled his eyes. "He's fine, Dipper! He's snow, not dead. Calm down." Pacifica stared at them all with an unimpressed look. "He's fine." she deadpanned.

"Well, magic is weird." Mabel shoved a mouthful of nuggets, rice and mashed potatoes into her mouth. "Once we thought him and Uncle Seb would stay as kids forever, so-" She shrugged. "We better be careful."

Dillon rolled his eyes again. He was almost sure magic couldn't affect them anymore. Not in a way that would really harm them, at least. Magic and weirdness loved their family anyway. "So~ How're things with Max going?" He changed the topic to something more interesting. Mabel giggled and wiggled her arms. "Well~" She flushed and looked away. Max wiggled. Dipper groaned. "Nope. I don't want to hear about it."

The oldest teen grinned widely. "Tell~ Wait. Is it something you can't say in front of kids?" He asked first, glancing at his brother and little cousins. He wiggled his eyebrows. "Mabel~" He teased and both Dipper and Mabel blushed a bit. She giggled and brushed her hair behind her ears. "We can gossip later, once the kids are all asleep…" Dillion gave her a wicked grin while Dipper covered his ears. "Lalala! I'm not hearing this!" Max blinked. "We've compulated, is that something humans don't talk to their pups about?" Miz snorted. "Yeah, it's fine. Seb and Wanda already explained reproduction to the twins."

"Still, not everyone likes listening to it!" Dipper pulled on his hat. Pacifica chuckled and ruffled the hair on the back of his head. "It's alright, you're shy. It's cute." Dipper flushed.

Dillon and Mabel laughed. "Mabs, now I want to send Diego to bed! You're so bad~" He pouted and the girl laughed again. Dipper tried to cover his ears and eat at the same time. He was failing, and looking quite funny. Great, now he was imagining things he shouldn't be doing and now he couldn't look at anyone. Dillon and Mabel were giving each other funny looks and wagging their eyebrows at each other. Dipper looked like he was going to die. The children didn't seem to pay attention as they ate their food.

Big kids talked about boring things anyway~

they all finished their food, washed and then went to hang out with the adults in the living room. They were talking loudly and laughing even louder, like every adult does when there's a family meeting, so they went upstairs to play something. Mabel and Dipper went to the attic and smiled. Waddles sniffed around, he remembered the house! This was his first house!

They looked for a board game or something to play, but they couldn't agree on anything. Miz suggested another round of Dungeons, dungeons and more dungeons. Dipper and the others looked sad at the reminder of Ford. Still, they had a few rounds of the game, did a quest in a small dungeon with a pack of squid-men who had been stealing farm animals from a nearby village. Diego's Sorcerer managed to electrocute the squid boss and everyone cheered when they finished the dungeon.

"I want snacks." Zoe declared and Dipper looked at her with a smile. "But we just ate, Zoe. Hungry already?" The little girl nodded and raised her arms to be picked up. Of course, her older cousin agreed and carried her. "Let's go downstairs and see what everyone is doing. Hold on, Zoe!" Dipper trotted downstairs, making the girl squeal. Everyone but Miz followed them downstairs, she said she needed to do something first.

Miz snuck up to Ford's room without anyone seeing her and checked on the sleeping man. He was breathing? Yes, yes he was. What a relief. She pet his curls and shook her head, Ford must have been completely exhausted if he was still sleeping. "You know...your dumb niblings think you're a snowman." She giggled. "So, stay here like a good boy so I can continue messing with them!"

She closed the door slowly and skipped downstairs.

What? It was a prank! Just harmless fun.

They probably should have expected something like this would happen.

Diego and Mabel were sobbing. Paz and Max were hugging their respective partner. Dipper was screaming. Dillon was glaring at Miz and her siblings. "Are you gonna come clean? Or should I tell them?" Seb's kids all winced.

So, Soos had to drive into town to get some stuff and everyone was forced to move their cars. During the confusion of shuffling the cars around, Stan has accidentally hit the Snow-Ford. Poor snow Ford was toppled over, his face broken in half and his arms snapped. The three kids who believed the lie were panicking and grieving.

"UNCLE FORD'S DEEEEEAAAAAD!" Mabel and Diego wailed.

"OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!" Dipper had a horrible thought! What if he turned back to normal dismembered?! He gagged loudly and covered his mouth.

Mabel knelt on the snow and tried piling it up together as she sobbed. "Ma-Maybe we can fix it! We have to tryyy!" Max tucked his tail between his legs. He didn't like Mabel feeling so sad!

The adults were watching them from a window with grimaces on their faces. Stan had apologized for it already, but they were still heart broken. "What's going on with them?" Seb wondered. Wanda sighed. "They must have worked really hard on it."

Zach and Zoe weren't sure if they should laugh or not. Miz was helping Mabel fix snow Ford. "Don't worry! There's plenty of snow for recovery! He's gonna be fine!" Diego ran over to help. They reassembled a lopsided snow Ford. Dipper was pulling on his hat and breathing wildly in panic. "B-but what if this doesn't work?!" He wailed.

"I'm sure uncle Ford will be fine." Dillon glared at the blond twins. "Unless there's something that you'd all like to say?" Zach and Zoe tried to look innocent but Dillon was Stan's son, more than that, he was good at seeing through lies. As funny as it was, their little joke was making Diego cry which wasn't nice, and he hated seeing his little brother cry. (Only Dillon got to make Diego cry!)

Diego rubbed his eyes and sniffled with a red nose. Dillon picked him up and cradled him to his chest like a baby. "It's ok, Diego, I promise he will be fine." He blew a raspberry on his cheek. "Let's go inside, ok?" Diego clung to his neck, scared for their uncle's safety. The blond twins sat down on the snow with a sad pout. Dillon was angry with them now.

Miz and Mabel put the finishing touches on Snow Ford. "That...that looks ok? Right?" Mabel bit her lip in worry. Miz nodded. "He'll be fine. Come on, it's getting dark, we should go to bed." she tugged on Mabel and Dipper to pull them back inside. Zach and Zoe glanced at each other. "Miz? Should we tell them?" They asked.

Miz sighed. "You can tell Diego. He's too little to have to worry about this. But Twins 1.0 are free game. They should have caught on that this was a joke." It was kind of mean but she liked seeing the looks on their faces. 'Oh wow I really am an asshole.' she twitched. But she actually felt a little bad, since Dipper and Mabel weren't supposed to actually be SAD about all this. That made it less funny.

Twins 1.0 went to curl up on the couch, sad and worried. Shermie and Abi had no idea what was going on with them but decided it wasn't important. They were sulking about a snowman after all!

Paz patted Dipper's head with a bland look on her blue eyes. "There. There." as Max nuzzled Mabel's neck and rumbled against her.

Dillon was taking Diego to their room and twins 2.0 ran after them. "Diego! Dillon! We have to tell you something." Zoe started sheepishly. Dillon crossed his arms and sighed. Diego blinked. "What?"

"Uncle Sixer isn't a snowman...it was a joke, but we didn't want you to be sad so now we are telling you." Zach pouted and Zoe nodded. "Yeah, we're sorry, but Miz said not to tell Mabel and Dip because it is funny!" Diego blinked. "That was mean! I was really scared! It's not funny!"

"It was Miz's idea!" The twins said quickly and Dillon grumbled. "Don't just blame Miz, you also agreed to go along with it so you're at fault as well. And I guess I did too, but that's because I'm kind of a jerk like that." The two little blonds pouted and glanced at their feet. Dillon sighed. "But Miz is the most to blame, since I'm pretty sure this was her idea to begin with." he knew that pranks were a thing, and frankly, he heard about some pretty messed up pranks the triplets played on each other and the rest of their family.

"I don't want Mabel and Dipper to be worried." Diego said and Dillon leaned back. "Well~ If they are gullible enough to still believe it, I think they deserve it." the younger kids laughed. "Besides, I'll distract them later with grown up conversation so they will forget about snowFord in no time."

They promised to keep quiet and went downstairs to have dinner with the family. Miz was quietly informed of the update and she nodded (feeling a little bad about the prank, but sort of afraid to come clean now, especially with how Dillon and Pacifica were glaring at her). The older twins were sad and Dillon couldn't help but roll his eyes. He loved them but they were kinda gullible. They really fought a demon and stopped the apocalypse? And they couldn't tell that Miz was pranking them? If Ford had REALLY been turned into a snowman, even as a snowman, the car would never have hit him. They were protected from harm like that.

And besides, if Ford had really been turned into a snowman, there was no way Miz wouldn't have changed him back, or possessively protected the snowman. So the fact that Miz didn't seem worried at all about all this, should have told them that there was nothing to worry about.

Zoe, Zach and Diego were eventually put to sleep by their parents at 8:30pm. They got warm milk and they dropped like dead flies. Dillon and his adopted demon cousin made their way towards their cousins' bedroom, the attic they always shared when they came to Gravity Falls, and found them staring at the ceiling. He sat down next to Mabel and Max while Miz sat next to Dipper and Pacifica. Pacifica was still glaring at Miz with an annoyed look. But she wasn't clearing things up for the twins either, so she and Dillon were both of the thought, 'Dipper and Mabel need to learn to be more observant.'

Dillon nudged Mabel. "So. You and Max have 'copulated' ehhh~?"

"Oh god! No!" Dipper grabbed a pillow and covered his face. Dillon, Mabel and Miz all laughed like the little perverts they were. Though Mabel still didn't seem like her usual self, worried about the snow Ford. Miz sighed. She wasn't gonna be any fun until she knew her uncle was ok.

"Hey. Ah...I have a confession." Miz said quietly. Dillon raised his eyebrow at her. Miz wiggled in her seat. "Ford's fine. He's not actually snow. I just thought it would be funny to prank you guys." Dipper and Mabel gasped at her. "Why would you do that?!" Mabel folded her arms with an angry look. Miz winced. "It was supposed to be a harmless prank. Ford wouldn't get hurt for real and I would be able to watch Dipper talk to a snowman. But then the snowman got knocked over and you two were so worried and…"

Dipper groaned. "You shouldn't have lied to us like that." Dillon snorted. "I can't believe you two fell for it. Miz is terrible at lying." The twins pouted hard. They couldn't believe how their OWN cousins fucked with them like that. Miz did look guilty though. "It was supposed to be harmless fun." She fiddled with her fingers. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to actually worry you two."

Dipper crossed his arms as Mabel sighed. She pulled the demon closer and hugged her. "Aww...Yeah, it worried us...but I would have lied to Dipper as well, it's fun watching him panic…"

"Hey!" The teenage boy scoffed and hit her shoulder softly. Pacifica leaned her head against his shoulder fondly. "Your high pitched screaming is pretty cute."

"So Uncle Ford is really sleeping, right?" Mabel let her go. "Wow, never thought I would say that."

"Yup. He was so sleep deprived that we all grounded him in his room. He's been overworking himself. And stressed from… a lot of things." she grimaced.

Everyone nodded in agreement. Miz poked Mabel's arm. "So...can we know how things are going with you and Max?" She asked sheepishly, hoping she would agree. Mabel laughed, a lot more light hearted now that she wasn't worried over Ford's well-being. She glanced up at Max. "Do you mind talking about what we do?" Max blinked. "I do not mind." and then he grinned. "In fact, we should boast about how wonderful it's been, together!" Mabel cackled and turned back to her cousins. "Well, funny story…" Mabel leaned against Max's chest. "Max's more comfortable in his true form, so we actually have been-"

Pacifica and Dillon's eyes went wide. Max shrugged, not seeing the fuss (Mabel had been really excited about it for some reason.)

"AND I'M OUT!" Dipper got up and stiffly walked out of the room as Dillon, Pacifica and Miz burst out laughing. The perverts talked about all sorts of juicy, sinful things long into the night. Max was just happy to be allowed to boast about his and Mabel's relationship. This wasn't something a male should be talking about, so this all was very exciting!

Dillon wiped his eye from when he'd laughed while talking about a funny date he and Phillip had together. "I'm surprised you're so interested in this kinda thing." He told Miz. The demon shrugged. "Just 'cause I have no interest doing stuff like that personally, doesn't mean it's not entertaining. Nor does it stop me from being a horny little bastard." Mabel laughed. "You are SO bad~!" She punched her shoulder and Miz just chuckled. "I've been told."

The lights were suddenly turned off and the group shouted, startled. Seb and Stan poked their heads into the room and frowned at them. "It's late. Sleep." Stan said simply. Seb looked down at the floor in the hallway and gently kicked a passed out Dipper on the floor. What was Pinetree even doing, sleeping outside the room?!

Dillon, Mabel and Miz groaned as Seb floated Dipper onto his bed. "Noo~" Dipper grumbled and fell back asleep.

"You can talk tomorrow." Stan rolled his eyes. Miz and Dillon sighed but got up and waved bye to Mabel. "See you tomorrow." Pacifica kissed Dipper's cheek before she left to head back to her own house. Miz offered to teleport her, but she waved it off. She had a car.

Dillon went to the room he was sharing with Diego and his parents while Miz went off to Seb and Wanda's room before stopping and going to Ford's. She had left her partner alone for too long already.

He had changed position and kicked his blankets off to spread out on the bed. She smirked. Did she accidentally curse him to sleep? This must be the longest he had slept in his entire life! Miz pushed him aside and laid down next to her human. He had been alone for too long…

She pulled the blanket over them and snuggled against him. It was too cold to sleep alone anyway. "Night Fordsie~" she yawned before summoning the Pikachu doll he bought her and wrapped her arms around it. Ford's expression gained a small smile at the warm figure pressed against his side.

Still asleep, his body instinctively pulled the source of warmth closer.

-.-

They all prepared for the Christmas holidays. As the weird family they were, they would celebrate both Hanukkah and Christmas (because Mabel wanted any excuse to have more celebrations) so they were all busy preparing the food and decorating the house. Hanukkah was long since over, but Mabel still wanted to call it that.

Ford was told about how he had fainted for an entire day and the kids made a snowman of him and were speaking to it all day. When he asked about it, they just said they missed him..

Well...he wouldn't question them about it. (Though he noticed the guilty look on Miz's face and made a note to ask about that later.)

Amelie arrived, to much fanfare and hugs from Miz and her siblings. Pacifica took this time to look Amelie up and down and nodded approvingly. She seemed nice, Pacifica had learned to sort of 'tell' what type of person someone was at a glance. It's how she knew that Mabel and Dipper were just that type of 'nice' that would make them easy pickings for people that weren't as kind. Though, they surprised her by how well they could actually stand up to her, it was something she had begrudgingly admired as a kid, and loved about them as the years went on.

Amelie didn't really know what Christmas would be like here, she knew about the holiday, because it was something very important to humans and cultural osmosis told her the basics. Zach, Zoe and Diego were quite happy to explain it to her.

"So… a large man will go into your house and leave gifts? And eat your food?" Amelie said slowly. Max shrugged. "I do not understand why this is desirable either. Humans are quite odd."

"Eh, Santa's essentially retired from the whole breaking and entering thing by now anyway. Modern houses have too many cameras and also people seem to get upset nowadays when a stranger gets into their house. So… yeah."

The children looked upset at this so Mabel quickly told them, "B-but we don't mind if Santa comes here, so maybe he'll show up?" (While Dipper took Miz aside and asked her to not ruin the magic of Christmas for the kids.)

"Do you think we can catch Santa?!" Zach jumped up and down as the older twins turned on the tv to show them a bad Christmas movie. Zoe rubbed her palms together. "We can make a plan to catch him!" She swore she saw bear traps somewhere...

Diego stared. "I don't think we should catch Santa. Doesn't he have an important job for the other houses that won't mind if he comes over?" Zoe looked at him. "Well...yeah...but, wouldn't it be so nice to meet him?! We can know where we are on his list!" She knew she wasn't the most behaved kid in the world...but she tried her best, and daddy said that was the most important.

Zoe turned to tug on her older sister's shirt. "Miz! Can you help us catch Santa?" The demon blinked slowly before shaking her head. "I'm not gonna mess with another god. I'm trying NOT to cause TOO much trouble in this dimension."

"What a great job you're doing~" Seb sarcastic voice called from somewhere in the house and Miz fumed. Bitch. "I will mess with anything I don't agree with! I got no problem with Christmas or Santa in and of themselves."

Dillon groaned at this whole topic (since he was still under the impression that Santa was not real and Miz was messing with them), when Dipper, gasping, interrupted him. "Woah, woah. Did you say God?!"

Miz raised an eyebrow. "Not God, god. Yahweh is gonna get fired as soon as uncle-Ax finds a replacement anyway." she huffed, "You shouldn't be so surprised. You've met gods before, heck, I'M a god. You've met the Love god too, right?" She shrugged. "Santa is a god of the coming dawn, he who takes during the winter nights and then allows the spring to come." She didn't see what the issue was. "Also, he's apparently the forever president of America? Still don't know what that was about, and he doesn't actually have anyone who acknowledges him as such anyway, so it's a moot point..."

Dipper and Dillon blinked. Well, yeah, Dipper met the Love god...but SANTA?! "Are you telling me Santa isn't that chubby man dressed in red that flies around the world delivering presents but instead is-is like a winter spirit?" Dillon felt so betrayed. One. Santa was real. Two. If he didn't give presents, that would explain why all his letters as a little kid never brought him back Dad…

But he was a god! He could have brought him back from the portal for Christmas right?! What an assho-ho-hole!

Miz shrugged. "In the old days he would leave small gifts to those in need who gave him offerings. But the whole...toys and presents thing? Nope. That's not his thing. He attempted to give stuff before, simple things like supplies and such? But toys for children were just small things like stuff made from wood and straw. Toys like the things people actually ask for? Nope. Especially now that people are asking for things like ePads and video games...he can't give people those kinda things."

The twins and Diego sniffled sadly. "So...We won't get presents from Santa…?" Miz scoffed. "Why would you need gifts from him? Mom and Seb already got you stuff. And Stan, and Ford and Shermie…" she laid back on the couch. "Frankly, if people are giving each other gifts anyway, there's no point in Santa giving people stuff. He's busy enough gathering the energy needed to end winter so the spring can come…" which was getting difficult, controlling the seasons was difficult. His worship energy was tainted by commercialism so he wasn't getting as much power as he used to. And with how much the humans fucked up the environment, it was getting harder for the nature spirits to do their jobs.

The kids huffed. Rude. They were five. They liked presents. Zoe stroked her chin dramatically in thought. "Dipper! Do you wanna catch Santa~? Miz won't, but we can!" Dipper groaned. "I don't think we should capture a god...but-" he looked up with a notebook in hand. "I do want to meet him." he had a determined expression. Mabel and Dillon nodded as well. Mabel was bouncing in place, because meeting SANTA? Who wouldn't want to?!

"I WANNA PET A REINDEER!" Mabel screamed. The children all cheered. "Come on! Let's ask uncle Ford and uncle Fiddle to build a Santa catching machine!" They all raced off, leaving Miz lounging on the couch. "Wait, no~" she drawled lazily. Santa, or rather, Wodanaz, the god of winter cold, the death and renewal of the earth for the coming Spring, was gonna be annoyed if he actually gets caught...but from what she's Seen, he's mellowed out over the centuries so they probably wouldn't get cursed for this… (also, he was pretty much retired. Being president of the United States didn't really count, since he didn't actually have real authority.)

"What?" Max asked, rather confused as to why 'Santa' was relevant for the human tradition. He wasn't mentioned by Dr. Pines in the lessons he got about human religious festivities! Not Christ-mas or Hand-u-kah! Dr. Pines just talked a little about the history and about the commercialism of holidays nowadays and brushed over the details. Apparently Hand-u-kah was about how people tried to kill Dr. Pines's ancestors while Christ-mas was about a human baby who was born but was actually a god and was then painfully killed as an adult to save humans...Human religions were scary.

Though the great dragon said that the baby was, "God's humansona." and Max didn't really know what that meant. Amelie thought this was all fascinating. But there was something she was worried about, "What's with humans and wanting to capture non-humans?" she asked Miz. The dragon shrugged. "Humans are weird." the other two cryptids nodded, that was very true.

-.-

They spent a nice Christmukkah together, watching movies and eating lots of food, and then prepared to capture Santa on Christmas. And for that, they needed help.

Fiddleford didn't appreciate getting assaulted in his own house (Tate, Tate's wife and Fiddleford's wife gaping as Ford and some other Pines burst in, grabbed him in a sudden kidnapping while shouting "We'll borrow him for a few hours!" and being separated from his adorable baby granddaughter, the most adorable child in the world.) "Ford! I was havin' a nice Christmas with ma family, you darn corn cobb!"

Though he had to admit he was also kinda excited to meet Santa. Ford mentioned how he never bothered putting out milk and cookies and thus, never had Santa show up. (Miz was still rolling her eyes in the background, not really stopping them since she was sort of curious, in a morbid way, how this'll all end up.)

So they got some cookies and milk together and Fiddleford built a contraption that was designed to close a cage around whoever stepped in to eat the cookies. Miz and Stan set off the trap a few times when they tried to sneak some cookies. ""Uncle Stan!"" Zoe and Mabel pouted angrily at the trapped family members, Miz was stretching her arm to try and grab the plate of cookies despite the metal cage around her. "Nuuuoooo~" Miz whined. "Why's the table so far awaaaaay~?"

"It was this demon's fault!" Stan wailed as they were freed. Miz punched his arm as they were released from the cage. "You suggested it!"

"Stan, don't ruin this trap." Ford glared at his brother. "We are leaving this for Santa." (Miz was not going to point out that a physical cage wouldn't really keep in most nature spirits, but Ford knew better than to have any sort of binding circle anywhere near her.)

"There are cookies in the kitchen though!" Zach commented, and Stan and Miz ran away to gorge themselves. Ford and Dipper sighed.

Everyone went to their hiding places at night. The house was empty, and the cookies and milk were lit by the soft light of a lamp. The twins and Diego took a nap in the evening to be able to stay awake at night, and now they were buzzing with energy, excited to see Santa. "When is he coming?!" Zoe whispered loudly and Seb put a hand over her mouth. "Kid, shh!"

Zoe, being her dad's daughter, entertained herself by biting his fingers, making Wanda roll her eyes. She still couldn't believe they had all managed to talk her into this. "What are you even planning to do when you capture Santa?"

"Ransom him for more presents!" Zoe cheered. "Pet his reindeer!" Mabel said at the same time. "Reindeer petting sounds reasonable, you will not ransom Santa though." Wanda exclaimed and the three were shushed by Ford and Shermie. (Shermie was surprisingly into this, having secretly always believed Santa was real and he wanted to get this validation.)

The hours passed (during which Miz realized the barrier around the Shack was preventing Santa from coming in, 'hacked' into the barrier, and opened it up temporarily) and they were starting to get bored when, finally, something happened. There was a shimmering light around the room that zeroed in on the plate of cookies. A figure began to form and as soon as it gained physicality, the trap was sprung. The metal bars extended and the large person-shaped figure was sealed within a cage of steel.

"Aha! We caught Santa!" Zoe cheered as she ran up to stare at the person they had captured. Everyone else came out to get a closer look. The figure resembled an elderly human male with a full, thick white beard, heavy coat of furs and glowing yellow eyes.

The little blonde gaped in awe before she smiled widely and opened her arms. "Santa!" She squealed. Everyone stared in shock, except for Miz, who looked unbothered, at the serious figure in front of them. The barrier was back up, so he couldn't attack them, even if he tried.

"Holy sleigh…" Stan exclaimed with his eyes wide as Dipper and Ford gaped. New spirit! Must! Investigate! Said spirit glanced around. "I can't believe you seriously set a high tech trap for me? Most kids just do things like snares or such nonsense… and you've even got an anti-magic barrier?" the old man sighed. "How are you all awake? Could have sworn I placed a sleep spell on…" He trailed off as his eyes fell on Miz lounging on the sofa. "Oh. You had a dragon." He sighed.

"Well-" Santa reached for the plate and ate some cookies. "Since I'm here anyway, what do you want?" he sat down on a chair nearby, still inside the cage and not really looking all that worried regardless.

Zoe stepped forward and smiled adorably at the unimpressed old man. "Hi, Santa! My name is Zoe! I'm 5! I wanted to meet you! Miz told us how you used to give presents to those who didn't have much, and also make it spring again, and I think that's very nice." She grinned. She wouldn't ransom... mommy said not to.

"He is my twin Zach, and they are my family! They also wanted to really, really meet you because you are really cool! And you have yellow eyes! Daddy said he used to have a yellow eye too!"

"Zoe…" Seb whined. "Don't embarrass me in front of Santa~!"

The winter god raised a thick bushy eyebrow. "Ah. That's very nice, Zoe...but it doesn't quite make up for you being on the naughty list." He munched on another cookie. "Also, you captured me and that's very irritating." He looked around. "It's a good thing I'm not on a schedule anymore, what with the mess of human timezones and the death of Time Baby...so I can afford to kill some time here."

"Ah….what?" Mabel scratched her head. Santa turned to her and smiled. "Ah, Mabel Pines. Long standing top spot on my nice list. It's very nice to meet you." Mabel looked thrilled.

Zoe's heterochromatic eyes widened in shock. But...why on the naughty list…? She always tried to be good...She tried really hard to keep her mischievous side in control because there was always a bad Zoe in her mind saying to do bad!

Zoe went over to her Dad and buried her face into his legs, whimpering softly. "Twying my best isn't good enough…" She whispered, devastated. Seb glared at Santa. "Hey! I'll have you know that Zoe has been on REALLY good behavior this year. How dare you!"

Santa sighed. Of course it was Seb Pines' daughter. He reached into his coat and pulled out a scroll of paper. It unfurled out and rolled between the bars of the cage. "Bit a classmate. Broke the pencil sharpener. On purpose. Ate the slice of cheesecake that her mother had been saving in the back of the fridge for special occasions…" He read off the list. Zoe's eyes went wide. "I didn't know that was mommy's!" she ran over to Wanda and hugged her tightly. "I'm so sorry mommy!" She wailed. Wanda twitched. Ah. So it was Zoe who ate it. She thought Seb had done it.

Santa sighed. "Frankly, Zoe HAS been much nicer this year. She is doing much better. So, please don't feel bad. I can tell you're trying your best." He held up a finger and pulled the list up to the bottom to point at the last note. "However, she DID want to ransom me. That's definitely naughty." he said matter of factly.

"It-It was a joke!" Zoe sobbed her eyes out. Zach frowned and hugged her tightly, worried for her. "My sister is the best!" He defended and stuck his tongue out. "I don't care 'bout your dumb list!"

Zoe slowly pulled away from him to be picked up by her dad, who held her tightly and wanted to cry as well. Just his luck that his chaotic tendencies for violence were inherited. No normal kid does what Zoe did, she was like him, and he was no normal kid. Oh, fuck, he was so sorry. "Noo!" He cried and then everyone stared at Zoe and Seb crying together.

Santa watched them cry, unimpressed, and pulled back his list. "I would have expected it, she is your daughter after all, but anyone can do better and improve themselves." Mabel glared. "Are you doing some pure of heart thing like the unicorns do?"

Santa scoffed. "Heck, no. Those overly fancy horses are a bunch of jerks." He shook his head. "You all seem to be misunderstanding something here." He reached up to his back and pulled open a furred sack that no one had noticed since it looked like the rest of his coat. "Being on the naughty list does not mean they are a bad person."

Zoe blinked up at Santa with teary eyes. The old man continued "It simply means they can do better. And she has been doing much better." He reached inside his sack and pulled out a stress doll. The type who's head could be pulled off and put back on via some Velcro. This one was shaped like an elephant. "And even naughty kids deserve a present if they're trying to be better. I haven't actually given a real gift in a long time, this is a first. Looks like my sewing practice wasn't in vain."

Zoe's eyes were wide as she stared at the doll Santa handed her through the bars of the cage. She shakily took it from him and hugged it. "So...so I'm not a bad girl?" She asked quietly. Santa chuckled. "Of course not. You're just naughty. I happen to have a third list that no one mentions, the blacklist, for children who do not deserve presents. But even they will get something, not a toy but a 'moment'. A small little Charm of Luck, both good and bad, to try and teach them what they've done wrong. Because I want them to try and be better." He shrugged before straightening back up. "Regardless. You all already have plenty of presents from your family, you all already receive all the love you could want from your family. There are some children who don't even get that much." he grimaced. "And I don't have the power I need to be able to help them. Nothing beyond leaving a toy I can make somewhere for them to find on their own."

Max finally got the courage to raise his hand. Santa looked him up and down before making a little grin. "Yes?"

"Mr. Santa, I still don't understand what you have to do with the human religion of the birth of that god baby." He asked, completely serious. "Why are you mentioned so much? Why is bringing gifts for kids so important if the holiday is for that baby."

"Well, it's the time, dear Maxini. My main job is to maintain winter and bring spring, the present activity is a secondary thing I acquired, to bring wonder and hope." Santa explained. "And any connections that this holiday has to the birth of Christ is due to the Christians melding their own religion with the pagan celebrations that existed around the winter as a way to appropriate and combine their beliefs with those of the people around them."

Max and Amelie both nodded in understanding. Humans, eh?

Dillon blinked. "Wow wow, wait. Hold on. How do you know Max's name? You do know he's a reptile guy, right Santa?" The winter god raised an eyebrow. "Reptile guy? Really? He's an Eix Leel, please be respectful. His people are some of the few who still worship me as I was meant to be."

Max blinked. "You…" his eyes widened. "You're the spirit of the coming spring!" he finally put together what Miz had said earlier. "The god who brings the end of winter and warmth of the new year!" His green eyes widened incredibly wide. Amelie looked at her cryptid counterpart with a raised eyebrow.

Santa let out a hearty 'Ho ho ho!' at that. "Oh yes, that I am my boy."

Max bounced in place. "I can't believe I'm getting to meet Iliaqun in person!" he squealed loudly, rivaling Mabel's own. Ford stared. One of Max's gods was a real god- oh. He flushed. No wonder Miz had been so angry about that. Max was all but falling over himself in excitement. He always worshipped his many gods, but he never thought he would actually meet one! Now he was bowing, he HAD to!

"So…" Amelie said slowly, looking Santa up and down. "This isn't your true form, is it?" Max looked up. Right! That was not how he imagined a god to look like. Just suggesting a god would look human would cause you to be thrown out of town for insulting them in such a way.

"That it is not, my dear." Santa chuckled again. "My name and form changes, as I am known under different ones." he patted his round belly. "I will say, this particular one is quite enjoyable to be in."

Ford, meanwhile, was staring at Miz. So… it was normal for gods to have different names and forms? Well, yes, Miz/Bill Cipher was a god after all. But Ford hadn't really thought about it from this angle before.

"C-can I see your form as Iliaqun?" Max asked hesitantly/hopefully. Mabel rubbed his back. Santa laughed again, "Of course, little one." and then, Santa glanced up and around him. He raised an eyebrow. Miz realized the issue and hacked into the unicorn barrier again to adjust the parameters to allow Santa to be an exception. Sanda noticed this, gave Miz a knowing smile. A fellow god recognizing one another. Santa wasn't sure which god this dragon was, but she was quite powerful. And old. Unfathomably old. Almost reminded him of Cipher. All the big named powers knew of Cipher, the self proclaimed lord of Nightmares. They also knew of his downfall, within this very town in fact.

And everyone stared as Santa's form shifted, he grew much larger, his heavy coat morphed into feathers, pure white as the freshly fallen snow. His face elongated into a large beak as his neck stretched out. A huge creature that seemed like a mix between a Gyrfalcon and an Adder, if the long scaled tail and reptilian eyes meant anything. He was huge, even taller than a full grown Eix Leel, imposing and powerful with wicked looking talons. The feathers around his head were much longer, looking like a beard.

(Miz was secretly disappointed that he didn't look like a Delibird.)

Max stared at his god, the majestic form the totems and the paintings depicted since he was a little hatching. He was really in front of Iliaqun, a god so important to them for bringing life after the harsh winters… Max's eyes rolled backwards and he toppled.

Mabel yipped when Max's tall us form fell over her and threw them both to the ground. "Wow. He really fainted from that." Seb commented, scratching his head. Iliaqun chuckled. "That tends to happen when a devout meets their god. Well, most of the time at least." He ruffled his feathers and shrank back into Santa. He much preferred his humanoid form. It was less scary (and had fingers) so he liked it better. Still, he wasn't going to tell Max that. The Eix Leel admired this form.

"So," Santa looked around. "Am I free to go now?" Mabel gasped. "Right, you've got more presents to deliver and stuff, right?" She called from under Max's passed out form.

Santa paused at that. "Technically… no. I don't have it in me to be able to do all that anymore. Not for everyone. My power wanes each passing year. Heck, I only came here because I felt your dragon there," he gestured at Miz, "Calling for me." (Miz coughed and looked away. Well, if her sweet little siblings wanted to meet Santa, she wanted to help them do so.)

Mabel's lower lip trembled. "W-what do you mean?" Power waning? Was Santa…

Santa sighed, sitting down heavily. "I'm pretty much retired. I can't keep up anymore. The human population grows, people keep wanting MORE than is in my power to give and I just don't have the strength to keep going anymore. Humanity doesn't need me, commercialism has already taken my job. And not enough people still follow the old ways of worship, I'm barely able to keep bringing spring as is. Sometimes I'm late, and winter goes on for longer than it should."

Mabel and Zoe cried. "Noo~!" The little girl walked over to her Uncle Ford, listening in shock, and pulled his arm with a strength no 5 year old has. "Free him!" she demanded, not liking the fact that he was in a cage anymore, "...Please, Uncle Sixer?"

Ford nodded and deactivated the trap, freeing the spirit who remained sitting on the chair, looking sad. "But you are important, Santa!" Mabel exclaimed. "You bring magic and illusion and wonder!"

Diego and Zach nodded, even the adults nodded. "Yeah! Your list isn't dumb…Sorry." Zach sheepishly rubbed his arm and Diego looked up at Santa. "Everyone loves you, Santa! What will happen to Christmas if you don't bring wonder and hope?"

The winter spirit sighed. "I don't think I'm really needed anymore for the whole 'Christmas' thing. Nowadays, people get suspicious when presents show up and no one knows who sent it." he ate the last of the cookies before gulping down the glass of milk. "Frankly, it's been difficult even giving gifts to the children whose families can't afford to buy any. They end up throwing them away or contacting the police. It's all very distressing." everyone watched as the god seemed to wilt in exhaustion.

"Right now, I just fly around to make mild adjustments to gifts, eat cookies to build my strength for the coming spring, which is much harder than you'd think, considering spring in the northern hemisphere means fall in the south, it's very hard to keep it all working…" Santa sighed sadly. He was so sad about the world. It had improved in some things of course, but the hate and intolerance was still present, people were selfish, and just wanted more and more material things. A lot of the other gods were losing their place in this new world. He heard the Love God had all but retired from matchmaking. Something about getting into the music career now?

The Pines stared at the sad spirit with long faces. They felt bad for him, but how could they help?

Mabel managed to get off under Max (used to his weight), leaped up in the air and screamed "WE NEED TO SAVE CHRISTMAS!" which got her an odd look from the two gods in the room. "Christmas isn't gone, the holiday at least." Miz pointed out. "People are still gonna celebrate it."

"No, I mean...people should...should…" Mabel slumped. "I have no idea how to save Christmas." Santa got up to pat her on the head. "I appreciate the thought, Mabel, but it's fine. I still donate toys to various charities that accept anonymous handmade gifts. It's...something."

He looked around. "And I'm still managing to do my duties to the planet, even if it's harder. I will be fine." he didn't really look like he fully believed it, but he didn't want to worry them.

He looked at his sack sadly and sighed. But before he could leave, Dillon came up to the front, "There really isn't anything we can do? I'm not an expert, but my family has saved the world from a demon!" Dillon pulled the older twins towards him for a hug. "I'm sure there's something!" He insisted, but Santa just sighed. "No, Dillon, there isn't…" He frowned a bit, the world was messed up and all this made him want a drink. "But…" All the Pines leaned closer.

"I could use some time to rest." Santa gave them a small smile. "These cookies are quite good." he gestured to the now empty plate.

Zoe snatched the plate from him and, with her twin, they both went to bring more. Seb blushed. "I made the cookies." he partially boasted. Santa chuckled. "They're wonderful. Thank you Sebastian." Seb grinned, feeling giddy and nudged Shermie. "Santa thanked me…" He grinned and his younger brother rolled his eyes.

Miz, who was quiet this whole time, suddenly said, "I could take you to the Island." when Santa stared at her, she continued, "Speaking of, I have been meaning to ask you about what to do about the situation in the world nowadays. With the children around the world suffering. If it's not the camps they're being kidnapped and shoved into, there's the kids being shot and killed, there's the kids being trafficked, the kids being raped-" Miz made a frustrated sound. "And I want to help them, but I don't know what I'm allowed to do. I took the children in the Shlump camps and keep them safe on my Island, but I don't know if it's a good idea to keep on doing that with all the other kids. I just… I don't know what to do."

Santa watched the dragon calmly. "I don't know. Frankly, if I had my way, all children would be protected from any and all harm. But I don't have the power for that."

"I could give you the power for that." Miz said outright. Santa blinked. Then he looked her up and down. "You are powerful, no doubt you have enough for it. But your powers are…" he tried to find a nice way to put this. "...too destructive?" Miz wilted at that. "I can filter out all the resonances…"

Santa shook his head. "I'm sorry. It just wouldn't work."

Miz sighed. "But… can I still bring you to the Island? So that the children there can celebrate and receive gifts? I can make them as many toys as they'd want, but it's not quite the same when I do so."

"CAN I GO?!" Max pleaded, suddenly sitting up and scaring the life out of Stan and Kari who were just standing next to his body. "I'm going with Maxi!" Mabel smiled.

Santa sighed defeatedly. "Alright."

Abigail and Carla blinked. "Alright...have fun...I'm too tired for adventuring…" They waved half heartedly at Santa who nodded in understanding, and walked to their rooms.

Ford volunteered to go, you know, to watch Max and Mabel of course, he only cared about their safety. Amelie joined on the adventure as well and after seeing that Dipper was going, Dillon agreed to come too. This adventure at least wouldn't end on anyone trying to eat him. It'd also be cool to talk more with Santa.

Stan and Seb eventually realized they couldn't go, because they needed to put their little kids to sleep. Curse you parenthood! Miz gave them a cheeky wave as she went off. Frankly, the children wanted to go, but they were too sleepy. The kids on the Island were probably going to be asleep by now too, but Miz, who'd shifted into Xin by the time they left the house, was sure that there would be a few still awake, that tended to happen, with some of the kids taking advantage of the fact that Xin had Blessed the Island with free Wi-Fi and full internet access.

Max had shifted into his eix leel form and after putting on the coat modified to fit his original form, he skipped and walked on four legs behind the two gods, with his girlfriend lazily riding his back. "I can't actually believe I'm in front of one of my gods! My brother and sisters will never believe it when I tell them!" He shivered when he stepped on some snow. Brr! Cold!

Santa chuckled. "I don't think it's really that impressive." Xin huffed, in dragon form now, with Ford, Amelie, Dipper, Shermie, Kari and Dillon on his back, rolled his eyes. "I'm a real ass god that you're in front of." the dragon grumbled. Ford laughed and patted his boyfriend's head. "Are you jealous?" he teased.

Xin huffed. "Of course I am! My pride is wounded! I'm a little annoyed is all. Max is my baby, and I'm a god." Ford pet Xin's head, chuckling as he went. "You poor dragon~" Xin snorted. "Do not patronize me! I am a god too! A space dragon demon god, sure, but I am!"

Ford cooed and Xin snorted at him, blowing air at him. "Argh!" Ford's glasses fogged up from the heat. Xin snickered at that. Dillon groaned. "Do you two have to flirt so openly?" Amelie raised her eyebrows. "Oh, have they finally admitted that they like each other?"

Dillon cackled. He was so proud of this newest relationship in the family, uncle Ford seemed happy, but Miz/Xin/Yun also liked teasing the scientist, which Dillon was all for. His uncle was dating a sex/gender shifting alien demon god! This was the most LGBT thing ever, while both were ace and he loved this! "Yeah, finally. They're a thing now, and Xin's our uncle now." Dipper nodded slowly. "Yes, this all is very confusing."

"Love is confusing!" Mabel cried from Max's back. Amelie rolled her eyes at them. "Well, love is certainly confusing, but I think the issue here is the fact that Xin has different identities for his different forms. And the fact that Xin is technically supposed to be Miz's brother."

"And that's not even going into the fact that uncle Ford is officially dating Yun." Dipper added. Amelie blinked. "Who?"

"Another one of my forms." Xin shrugged, gliding his way through the trees. Santa looked up at that. "Ah, how many different variations do you have?" the god asked the fellow god.

"Hm…" Bill, Miz, William, Xin, Yun, Jan… "Like, six?" Xin grinned. "One for each of my daaaarling's fingers~" Ford choked. "Don't say it like that! It sounds very odd!" Kari laughed uproariously. "Oh, don't be like that dear, I think it's adorable~" she slapped Ford's shoulder.

"It sounds kinky, is what you mean." Dillon cackled. Dipper was burying his face in his hands."GuYs...You're All a bUnch of pErverts." his voice cracked multiple times. Everyone laughed. Amelie giggled, these guys were always so amusing to hang out with. "I haven't met any of the gods that my people worship. Are they real too?" she asked.

"Technically speaking, all gods are real, so long as someone truly believes they're real. And even if they lose all belief, if they have enough power, or move and change into becoming another god, they can stay in existence." Xin twisted his long neck around and grinned at the people on his back. "So… yes. Cliodna is technically real, though not exactly the same as the legends."

Amelie squealed at the news.

They finally reached the rift taking to the Island. Max licked Mabel's cheek and she 'whooped' as Max ran through it. Santa looked impressed as he looked at the magic around the area. "It's based on a unicorn glade, isn't it?" he raised his eyebrows. Xin made a proud sound. "Fully functional ecosystem inside, I'm still working on expanding the ocean, need more space for some of the larger fish after all." and with certain fishes being overfished by humans out in the rest of the world, Xin liked the idea of having a safe breeding place for rebuilding populations. Like Tuna. They required an insane amount of space to grow. And needed lots of food too. Xin was working hard to build the ecosystem around the Island. Perhaps… someday… he could even expand the space enough to add another Island, for more people to escape to, to get away from the outside world… (Xin pushed down the pang of sorrow over the idea of what Blue would have said about it.)

"That's very impressive." Santa nodded with a grin. The Care Units approached the group and bowed. "Hello Creator." Care Unit 1 said. Xin nodded at them all. "How're the children?" he asked softly as he lowered himself so everyone could get off his back. "They have been doing well. The adults have adapted to leaving and re-entering the Island. Sometimes they take some of the children with them. We keep close track of which children leave, and do not rest until they have been returned."

Xin nodded. He knew that everyone was wearing the pendants so they'd be able to teleport to safety if anything happened. Still, he worried. And the Care Units knew to keep track of the children carefully. There were a few adults and teenagers still awake and they came out to greet their dragon god.

Xin rumbled as he nuzzled them. "Heeey~ why aren't you in bed? You need to rest." he told the children. They giggled and petted Xin's snout. "We'll go to bed soon. We wanted to finish a few games." Xin scoffed. "Alright~ but I'm actually gonna need you all to stay awake for a little while longer."

"Hello, Max! Mr. Pines!" they waved at the people they knew. The dragon's 'pup' as Xin always called him, grinned and wagged his tail in greetings.

"This is my partner, Mabel!" Max proudly showed her off. Mabel looked around the island, amazed before grinning at the islanders. "Yup! My boyfriend!"

And that's when one of the kids saw Santa. She stopped dead and stared. The other kids noticed too and they all gasped. They weren't sure if this was real. Xin grinned at them all. "This is Santa. I realized the Island isn't somewhere he can reach normally, so I thought I should bring him here." Xin bent down to nuzzle Santa. "I know they've got cookies and milk here too."

Santa chuckled. The adults were sort of confused, thinking that this was someone hired to pretend to be Santa for the holidays. That was… until Santa whistled and a sleigh flew through the air, pulled by reindeer.

And Xin sent the Care Units to wake the other children, so they could all meet Santa. The elemental spirit was gesturing for his reindeer to land on the beach. The children were all squealing in excitement. Because Santa was REAL! Just like in the movies! Only this was COOLER!

All the children were woken up and when they went outside and saw what was happening on the beach, they ran towards Santa squealing. The spirit's eyes widened a little at the surge of energy. "They have very intense beliefs." He looked at Xin, who nodded solemnly. "Had to get used to it. They're sweet kids, and they love deeply, if cautiously. As long as you treat them with love in return, they'll be your steadfast faithful."

Santa had a contemplative look on his face. He turned back to the children. "They're… happy." he relaxed a little. "I'm glad you saved them." he waved to let his reindeer loose from their harness and the kids squealed as they pet the animals. Mabel was also petting them, looking like this was the greatest day of her life.

"There are more children I want to save. But I don't know how to go about doing it." Xin admitted. Santa sighed. "Simply taking them would be considered kidnapping."

"I prefer the term 'spirited away'." Xin snickered. Santa rolled his eyes."Well, so long as you ask them, and their parents, if parents are available, and they agree…"

"And if the parents are no good?" Xin narrowed his eyes. Santa sighed. "Even so, to take a child from their parents, even if for their own good, it's a delicate situation all around."

"I know." Xin grimaced. "I will figure something out. I don't know yet, but I realized I need to ask other people for their own thoughts on the matter." he tilted his head at Santa. "...why won't you take over as the president of the united states? You're the current and forever president, aren't you?"

Dipper perked his head at that. Wait, he kind of remembered seeing that somewhere?! He looked at his uncle, his source of valid information, and the scientist nodded solemnly. Dillon just looked lost.

Santa groaned. "Kind of hard to really do that when most people don't even believe I'm real."

"You're right here. Can't you just… reveal yourself to the world?" Xin asked gently. The old winter spirit shook his head. "I tried, a long time ago. Things didn't work out. Heck, when I was not so graciously ignored to the point of being kicked out, they did a whole coverup. To make it seem even MORE that I didn't exist." He actually sneered. "Even hired that soda company to make me their mascot for the sake of capitalism, to further soil the flavor of my worship into something twisted that I could no longer use for sustenance."

"That's so sad." Mabel pouted. "Those dummies suck ass." Max snorted. Dipper hummed and crossed his arms. "Yeah, the whole thing about Trembley was only allowed to be known by the town after Weirdmageddon and the Northwest lost a lot of their fortune…Before that, a lot of government information was hidden." And even now, a lot of government information was still hidden.

"...what?" Dillon and Kari deadpanned. Because, seriously, what the actual fuck?

"Ughh too long to explaaaaaain~" Mabel groaned. "Bla bla bla, the Northwest founder of Gravity Falls was a fraud, bla bla, Ben Franklin was a woman, blaa Quentin Trembley threw himself off a cliff on his horse, yadayada, Time Baby will return once the polar ice caps melt, and encasing yourself in peanut brittle can make you immortal or something."

Max, Amelie and Kari blinked. Dillon slowly shook his head from side to side. "None of what you just said makes any sense."

"Dont worry about it." Mabel waved it off. "It's just real government conspiracies and omens of the future." she said cheerfully. Everyone else stared at her in horror. Dipper shrugged. "She's not wrong."

Xin and Santa were with the children, Santa offered to let the kids ride his sleigh and Xin wanted to give the kids a ride on his back. The adults who were here and awake were somewhat worried, but they couldn't really stop the children from doing what they wanted. Ford was trying to assure the parents that the kids wouldn't fall off the dragon.

The kids had a fun time flying through the air. While up in the air, one of the kids asked Santa, almost hesitantly (and with an underlying of bitterness) "Why didn't you save us?"

Santa's expression dropped. He sighed. "I didn't have the power to." he glanced over at the other children. "It's not an excuse. And I failed you all. I'm sorry I didn't help you all before."

The kids considered that. And also how sad Santa looked. "So you're not as strong as Xin?" One girl asked. Santa chuckled, "Yeah, that dragon's something special."

"Why didn't Xin save us earlier?" another kid asked. Xin, flying nearby, sighed. "I didn't come to this planet until the beginning of this year. And I'm sorry I didn't help you all sooner."

Dillon (also riding in the sleigh) glanced at Santa as he tucked his hands under his armpits. "So...that's why you couldn't bring back my dad sooner…"

Santa nodded ashamed. "I tried locating him, but it was so hard, multiple dimensions is not really my thing. And I barely have power here on Earth, much less out there in space." Dillon smiled at the god. Well, at least he tried. That reassured him that he wasn't been ignored him as a kid.

"It's hard." Santa admitted. "Knowing what all children want and ask for, and being unable to give them what they needed." The pain of being a god with no real power, really. Xin nudged him gently. This poor guy, so good and barely keeping up because of some ASSHOLES. Well, he was going to help, because he was so awesome!

(And her pup was amazed by him.)

Xin still needed to ask more people for their opinion on what to do to help. But frankly, it was getting to the point where hostile takeover might just be the best option by this point.

They spent a few more hours, Dillon and Dipper, against their hard resistance, ended up falling asleep, leaned against their grandma like babies. Kari held said babies against each shoulder and Mabel took a photo. Max always slept early too, which she thought was adorable, and he was curled up with some very not sleepy kids, trying to listen to them and not fall asleep on them. The Care Units and the other adults helped get all the kids back to bed. Xin even went human form to help tuck a few of them in. Then Santa left some more handmade dolls for the kids, tucking one under the blankets for each child. He also thanked Xin for showing him the Island.

"Can we keep in touch? If I need someone to talk to about being the new president when I finally find a way to get rid of the current administration?" Xin asked. Santa snorted. "I don't know much about politics and governing."

"That's fine. The current president doesn't know anything about governing either. Or much of anything at all." Xin scoffed. "Seriously though, keep in touch dude." Xin handed Santa a triangle pendant. "As fellow gods, if you ever need help with anything, just ask."

"...thank you." Santa bowed his head. And then he was up in his sleigh and flying away to gather more energy needed for the coming spring.

Xin yawned and looked around for his charges. Kari woke up her grandsons and they both groaned before climbing up to Xin's back. Amelie yawned and did the same. Mabel rubbed her eyes and followed suit because her passed out boyfriend was picked up by Xin's giant jaws and carried by his waist. He hung limply. Ford patted Xin's head. "So… getting more people for your second, third and fourth opinions?"

"It's what I'm supposed to do." Xin managed to answer despite holding Max in his mouth. Ford sighed. "Following your brother's advice, when it is actually good advice, isn't a 'supposed to do' type of thing." He told Xin gently. "You don't have to think of things as stuff you're 'supposed to do' just because someone told you to."

Xin snorted. "Like you're telling me right now?" Ford flushed. "You know what I mean."

Xin sobered, looking away as his feathers drooped. "...yeah…" Ford sighed. Even now, MizBill still valued what their brother said. Ford couldn't help but be a little angry about that. At how Blue could so easily effect MizBill's mood. "Come on, lets get the kids to bed."

"Mmmnot a kid…" Dipper mumbled in his sleep. The adults all chuckled quietly.

When they got back, Xin shrank down both into human form and sex to Miz. She proceeded to yawn and sway on her feet until Ford picked her up (after kneeling down and opening his arms for her to choose to come to him). "Tired?" Ford asked. Miz nodded sleepily. Ford hugged her against his chest and carried her inside.

The rest of the teenagers were put to bed and the adults all went to settle into the livingroom to talk about what had happened today. Stan, Seb, Wanda and the others were still awake, having been waiting for their older kids to return.

"Well." Kari sipped her hot chocolate. "Santa is supposed to be our president instead of that monster currently in office. Anyone else vote to let Miz take Shlump out and put Santa in charge?" she said halfway seriously. Wanda sighed. "I'm almost tempted to agree."

Seb blinked. "Seriously?" Wanda rolled her eyes. "If things don't get any better, and if people are going to continue being hurt and oppressed and killed, I think it might be ok to sic an alien demon dragon god on him."

"Are we really going to let Miz go full demon-god on humanity?" Shermie twitched. He was still rather weirded out by this entire subject. "I mean, I'm all for getting rid of Shlump, but… can Santa even run a government?"

"Well, movies have already predicted alien takeovers." Seb stroked his beard. "After all, the US is the only one attacked in movies and it's perfect!" He grinned. Stan shrugged. "I don't really care. As long as she doesn't mess with us, I don't see why we can't have Santa running America."

"I need something stronger than this." Wanda looked down at her eggnog. "I'm going to need to talk to Santa Claus and ask him how much he knows about administration and delegation and knowledge on human laws and… everything." she sighed. "My real complaint against Miz taking out Shlump was that there would be no one to take over after, and now that she's found someone… well, I don't want to rush into this without checking thoroughly. And in any case, Santa would have to actually agree to do it in the first place."

"Well, this is too weird, good night." Seb waved lazily. Wanda rolled her eyes at his utter disinterest. And she still remembered with amusement how he told Blue 'Oh yes, yes, I'll do something, definitely." Just to make him shut up. Oh, her husband. Lying to that demon to his face.

Miz twitched in her sleep, frowning slightly where she was resting her head against Ford's shoulder.

Speaking of Miz…

Ford was still carrying her as she slept. She refused to let go of his jacket after all. Everyone made weird, almost teasing, sounds at him when Miz shifted a little with a soft hum, and Ford just shook his head at his family. Really, what was so funny about it? Seb carried Zach all the time, and Wanda often carried Zoe. Heck, Stan held Diego when the boy fell asleep and no one made a fuss over it. How was him holding Miz any different?

Besides...Miz was his partner and they were all exhausted.. They all checked the time and decided to retire for the night. Ford cuddled Miz as he fell asleep, already used to having her by his side as he slept.

Max was a little unsure what to do with himself. There were no classes to keep his head distracted, and he couldn't just go have a walk. It was way too cold.

It'd be so amazing to just...sleep until spring came, but Max doubted he could do that, he felt this time awake had messed up his schedules. Despite that, he felt sleepy and his need to cuddle was going overboard. There would be nothing better to just curl up against the heater, with the electric blanket the Great Dragon had gotten for him (he should really talk to the priestesses to allow everyone to have these for next winter!) and have his beautiful girlfriend by his side.

But that couldn't be it.

Mabel was a bubbly active person, she was jumping from here to there, helping with someone, squeezing her pet pig's cheeks, bothering the human pups, playing outside (something Max refused to do), and Max didn't want to stop her, it was her family, though it made him feel lonely. He only knew Dr. Pines, but he also had to be with his family, and while he knew Mr. Shermie and Mrs. Abi, talking to them wasn't something he felt comfortable with.

So the young Eix Leel just wrapped the blanket around himself even more and sighed. He should nap…

"Yellow~ Mind if I sit here?" Max looked up. Oh. "Hello, Mr. Pines. Ah, I do not mind if you sit."

Sebastian smiled and sat down besides Max. "So, I'm guessing you're super cold. Do you want Miz to put some sort of heating charm on you or something?"

"No, it's alright. The great dragon has already helped me enough." Max shook his head. And even if he was warmer, it still felt super weird to be out in the snow. Sebastian shrugged, "If you're sure. So… you just gonna huddle here all day?"

"Well, I don't know what else to do? I don't want to go outside." Max admitted.

"There's plenty of stuff you can do indoors. In fact, come on kid." Seb gestured for Max to get up and follow him. Max did, still hugging his blanket and the two went to the kitchen. "So… since Santa ate all the cookies, I thought I would bake more. And I could use some help."

Max blinked. "I...don't know how to do that." He confessed, ashamed.

"Well, help me then." Seb shrugged. "I really want to use this new oven~ It's much better than the one I had when living here. In fact, lots of things have been repaired, I wouldn't expect anything less from Miz."

"You...You lived here?"

"Yup! Thirteen years! I bet you already saw the Mystery Shack, aye? That was my creation!" Seb opened his arms wide. "And Soos, but I won't count it as he didn't put money in it, well, not at first anyway." He waved a six-fingered hand dismissively.

Max giggled and stood closer to the funny human, towering over him. "Why are you covering one eye?" he wondered about this since neither mister Ford or Stan covered their eye.

Seb grinned and lifted the eyepatch. Max made a choking gasp and the blanket on his shoulders fell. "Holy Gods!" Max covered his mouth. There was NO EYE! "It looks horrible!" The Eix Leel without a filtered mouth, exclaimed.

"Thanks! I know, that's why I use the eyepatch." Seb laughed and covered his scarred eye socket once again.

Max felt a little bad for blurting that out so bluntly. Seb noticed his discomfort and laughed it off. "It's fine kid, really." He patted Max's shoulder and the two made it to the kitchen. It was bigger than it was when Seb owned it. Not hugely bigger, but he could see new equipment and the room had been expanded. He was glad to see that the items were more or less organized the same. He easily found the flour and butter and other ingredients.

"I have eaten cookies before, Miss Melody gave me some, but I can't eat chocolate ones, the great dragon says I'd die."

"I feel EXTREMELY SORRY for that. But it's good to know. I will avoid using any chocolate." Seb nodded. "Hm… how about… some shortbread cookies? With rosemary?" Max nodded, not having a real opinion one way or another. Seb began directing him to help with measuring things out, once Seb looked up a recipe on his phone and began reading off it.

As they started working (Max handing materials or ingredients to him or getting stuff on taller shelves "Why are you so damn tall, kid?!"), Max asked. "Why did you move from the house if you lived here? Is it because of your eye?"

"Nah, I got together with Wanda so we kinda moved to our own place, this IS Sixer's house originally, not mine."

"And then why were you living here?" Max was very confused at this, but Seb waved it off. "Too long too explain. Not important. People just move houses sometimes." he paused. "Is that something your people don't do?"

Max nodded and stared at his hands. "We only move out of our parents house when we get married. And even then, we still live in the same village...Unless you're male, you'd then move to your wife's family if she was from a different one."

"Sticking close knit? That's pretty cool." Seb didn't really like how annoying the people in Max's village were (what with the whole, almost sacrificing, or eating them all thing), it was even worse than humans. It sounded as if someone took the worst of the worst of xenophobic, sexist and he'd be tempted to say racist human culture and just put it on high. But the Eix Leel weren't human, so Seb couldn't really say anything about it.

When the cookies were in the oven, and the two admired their hard work, Max looked up (or down, actually, Seb is still small). "Mr. Seb, how are humans assigned their jobs?"

"Huh?"

"I mean...How are you chosen to be a scientist like Dr. Pines, or a merchant, like my boss in town?"

"You aren't chosen, you just do it, like you decide to do it yourself." Seb explained. "You study sometimes for it." he shrugged. "I wanted to get into clothing design. So I worked really hard for it."

"So… it doesn't matter...uh…"Max rubbed his arm. "What have YOU chosen then? You said clothing design, but what does that mean?"

"I make clothes! FANCY clothes. I create cool looking clothes people wear!" Seb grinned as Max thought in silence. "Why would you make clothes people can do themselves?"

"Cuz humans don't make their own clothes anymore. Well, most people don't." Max hummed, pulling at his jacket. He made it himself.

"That sounds amazing. Being able to choose." he smiled. Seb shrugged again. "Ehh, well, I got lucky. Not everyone can get the job they want. There are plenty of people who work really hard but still can't get a job in the field they want. Which sucks. Life isn't nice, or easy. You just gotta get over it and keep working as best you can with what you can."

Max looked down, scared. Wow. That sounded horrible. "What happens to the people who can't get the job they want?"

"It depends on the person. Some give up. Some find something else that they want more, which fits them better. Some just work on something else because there's not much they can do. I mean, it sucks, but people need money to live. There's paying for rent, and food and medicine… it's hard. And most people aren't as fortunate as I am, to be able to actually reach their dreams." He shook his head. "Sorry for being a downer, let's check on the cookies…" Seb bent down to stare into the oven, the cookies were looking great.

Max was still thinking. Even if there was the high possibility that he would fail, the idea of being able to try was… it was an amazing idea.

"I think they're done!" Seb cheered as he brought the tray of cookies out. Max's nose twitched. The smell was amazing~

In fact…

"""COOKIES!""" Many voices screamed as Zach, Zoe, Miz, Diego and Mabel thundered into the kitchen. Seb screamed and held the tray high above his head as the children swarmed and jumped, reaching for the cookies with wild looks in their eyes. "No! You have to wait for them to cool first!" Seb scolded, even as he hid his proud smirk.

"Also, say thanks to us! Max and I made them." He put the tray on the table and pulled Max in for a hug. The kindergarteners chorused "Thank you!" as Mabel grabbed Max's cheek and kissed his lips. "OH YOU LIFE SAVIOR!" Max wiggled with a flex of his feathers (though because of the illusion no one could see it). He made Mabel happy! With the cookies!

"I'm sorry for abandoning you~ I'll stay here with you now!" Mabel grinned before jumping into his arms without warning. Max easily caught her and they walked into the living room. He did glance back at Sebastian though, as if asking if it was ok to leave, and the man just shooed him off, and floated his blanket at him. When it was above him, it covered both Mabel's and Max's heads.

-.-

Melody huffed as she made her way over to the couch. She was excited to be a mother, but she did wish it was a little easier on her body. Carrying another person inside her was a lot of work.

She looked up from rubbing her belly to see Miz staring. Melody chuckled good naturedly. "Do you want to feel?" she asked, having gotten used to people wanting to touch her belly. Miz looked hesitant. "U-um…" the dragon was half hidden behind the edge of the couch, crouching behind the arm. Melody patted the cushion next to her. "Come on, I don't mind, really."

Miz slowly made her way over. Sitting on the couch and scooting over to be closer to Melody. She didn't reach out to touch her belly though, just staring at it. Melody reached out to place her hand gently on Miz's head. "What's on your mind?"

"...I've seen people pregnant many times. And it's always… so cool, and also scary." Miz admitted. "But I can't help but… be interested in it." she reached out, but stopped before actually touching Melody. And then Miz pulled her hand back and laid them in her lap, still staring. Melody was a little unnerved by the intensity. "What are you looking for?"

"For when they gain a Soul." Miz said. Melody blinked. "O-oh?" she looked down at her belly. "There's no Soul right now?" she asked. Miz tilted her head. "There is. I'm just trying to figure out when they gained it."

"Why do you call her a 'they'?" Melody asked, as she and Soos found out the baby was female. Miz shrugged. "They're genetically female, but I don't know if they're mentally female yet. The Mind isn't fully formed."

Melody blinked before nodding. Oh. Alright. She rubbed her belly lovingly. "We can't wait to meet them." Soos was also incredibly excited, as well as incredibly nervous. But she expected that.

"How does it feel?" Miz asked, finally looking away from the belly and up to Melody's face, sort of attempting to do eye contact before her gaze slid off down to her chin instead.

"Um...I don't know...it's weird, not gonna lie, but exciting." Melody chuckled. "I guess it's also a bit of a pain? My insides feel like they're being shoved around. I have to pee constantly, my feet hurt if I stand or walk for too long…" she listed off. Miz nodded, "Pyronica complained sometimes about how cold she felt, since her internal temperature was colder while she was pregnant."

Melody raised an eyebrow. "Well, I do get hot and cold sometimes, I'm sure it's because of my changing hormonal levels." Miz slowly reached out her hand again, but hesitated and withdrew once more. Melody sighed. "Are you afraid?"

Miz shrugged. "I… maybe? I dunno. I mean, there's some ambient Weirdness around all the time, but I'm pretty much made of it, dunno what I might do to a human embryo-" she rambled off. Melody wasn't buying it. "What are you really afraid of?"

Miz paused. "...I'm afraid I'd get attached to yet another person who'll someday die and leave me."

Melody flinched. "Ah, no offense Miz, but once the baby's born, you're going to-"

"I know." Miz sighed. "But when they're…" she gestured to Melody's belly, "...like this? Not even fully formed, infinite possibilities, well, near infinite. I worry about what I might do…"

Melody frowned faintly. "What might you do?"

And Miz shivered. "I want a baby." she said softly. Melody felt a bit of a chill go down her spine. "Well, you're still a little young for that." She didn't bring up what she was really thinking, that being that Miz might want to take her baby, in her want to have one. She didn't want Miz to have to admit to it, if that really was what she was thinking.

"I'm not a child." Miz turned her head away. Melody sighed. "I feel like there's a very long story behind this." she said more to herself than anyone else. "I know you're some sort of immortal alien space dragon, but right now, you're… um… no offense…"

Miz huffed, leaning back and shifting into Yun. "I'm not a kid." She repeated, stretching out and looking quite affronted. Melody sighed. "You have a complex about this, don't you?" she asked gently. Yun paused. "...a little." she said finally. "I… I'm an adult. I am! Just 'cause I'm in child-mode most of the time doesn't mean…" she trailed off. "I'm… still trying to figure out what I want to be." she played with her fingers, flexing them and watching the black markings swirl around along her skin. "I wanted to be a little sister, a daughter, a child who could be protected and cared for. Who doesn't have to stress about the consequences of their own decisions, just doing what they wanted. Just having fun." she leaned back against the couch. "But all that ended up doing was making problems that I have to deal with, because foisting my problems off on other people isn't right." she folded her hands in her lap again. She just couldn't be what she wanted. She couldn't be what other people wanted. And she ended up hurting people with her attitude and actions. (Like her brother. She hurt Blue deeply, and she still hated herself for that.)

"So, if I can't be a child. Then… I might as well grow up and be an adult." Yun sighed. "But even so, Miz is Wanda's daughter. I'm still a kid part of the time. But what do I actually want to be? I don't know."

"Well, I think that actual age means nothing in terms of maturity, if that's what you're worried about." Melody smiled reassuringly. "Maturity comes from experience. The things you learn from the things you've gone through."

Yun blinked. "So… I need more life experience, with being an adult?"

"With everything, essentially. It's not all about adulthood." Melody chuckled. "There's always more to learn, and experience. And you use those things to grow and change and, well… mature. And frankly, being an adult sucks. Don't throw away your childhood. Ride tiny trains. Be weird. Have fun. There's nothing wrong with doing that. If you're immortal, you've got pretty much forever to be an adult eventually. So there's nothing wrong with taking it slow and getting experience from everything as you go."

Yun considered that. "...There's a lot that I need to think about. Things I need to do." she ran a hand through her hair, pinching the end of her bangs and playing with it absently. "Thank you for the talk."

Melody snorted as she laughed. "It's no problem. I hope you figure out what you want to do."

Yun smiled, then reached out her hand until it was hovering above Melody's belly, not touching yet. "Can I?" she asked shyly. Melody laughed. "Sure. Just be gentle, I swear I'm gonna pee my pants if anymore pressure is applied to my bladder."

Yun laughed as she very gently put her hand down and let it lie there, feeling the growing life inside.

Baby. A new life. A blank slate for all sorts of possibilities. Yun felt a churning pain inside, but she smiled anyway.