Callie stepped out of the manager's office, thankful that her father's attorney was already waiting for her and signing the hospitality contracts took no time at all. She was hot, tired, hungry, and just wanted to pick up something for dinner, take a hot shower, and spend a quiet evening at home with her family before their busy work week began. Hearing her daughter's voice call out to Arizona, she looked up to see her little girl wearing a concerned expression, standing near someone who was kneeling on the ground. She started walking in that direction, pulling out her phone in case she needed to call for an ambulance, and watched as Arizona rushed over and helped the other woman up with her usual cheerful smile on her face. Watching her girlfriend for any sign of panic, she saw the instant that smile slipped and recognition and anger flashed in those gorgeous blue eyes. It was only a fraction of a millisecond and if you didn't know Arizona, you wouldn't have seen it, but she saw it. Walking closer to see what had upset her girlfriend, Callie finally got a good look at the older woman and her entire body ran cold with pain, fear, anguish, grief, and anger. Every single emotion she had experienced for the past 8 years involving that woman attacked her heart and mind at the same time.
She was broken from her initial shock when she heard Arizona say something to Sofia, correcting herself before she said her name, and then watched as their daughter skipped away without a care in the world or any clue that the woman she had been helping was the woman who abandoned them when she was just a baby. Both women turned to watch Sofia run off and were facing away from her so they didn't see her approach. Hearing the elder woman say Sofia reminded her of her youngest daughter nearly turned her stomach. She said it with such tenderness and love, as if she spoke to her often, as if she even cared about her at all, as if she didn't denounce every aspect of her life and walk away on her wedding day. It also made her realize her mother had no idea who Arizona was and she was still putting on a show for the public like she always did. The whole interaction ignited a fire within her, one she wasn't sure she wanted to tame. She realized she wasn't the only one and couldn't help but swell with love and pride when she heard her girlfriend's voice laced with controlled anger reply, "Well there's a reason she looks like your youngest daughter." Hearing the confused but defensive, "And what would that be?" only cemented for Callie that this woman, who she had mourned over for years, didn't even recognize her own daughter's family, both literally and figuratively. Steeling herself, she cut in, "Because she is mine. Hello mother."
Lucia flinched when she heard the cold tone, the formality, coming from the now unfamiliar voice of her daughter. She was further shocked when she turned to see that other than her facial features, this person didn't look like her daughter at all. Her long beautiful hair was all but shaved off, her face was nearly bare of make-up, her stylish form-fitting attire replaced with an over-sized t-shirt and baggy shorts. Glancing from her barely familiar daughter to the blonde she now realized was Arizona, then to the precious little girl sitting patiently across the room, she felt that visceral pain stabbing at her heart once again. This was her daughter, her family, standing in front of her and she had no idea who they were.
Without hesitation, Callie naturally reached out for the one thing she knew would ground her in this moment and linked hands with Arizona, almost breathing a sigh of relief as their fingers intertwined. That simple act alone soothed her soul and she knew she…they, would face the storm that was looming, together. Brown eyes flooded with a myriad of emotions locked on blue eyes swimming with love, concern, and fury, and she quickly corrected herself, "Ours, Sofia is our daughter." Arizona tightened her grip as a silent thank you and both women turned to Lucia who had yet to say anything. They watched as her gaze moved to each of their faces, over to Sofia, down to their linked hands, then back to Callie as she opened her mouth and started, "Sofia…I didn't even…" But she was instantly cut off by Callie's angry inquiry, "You didn't what? Recognize your own flesh and blood? Realize you were talking to the other mother of your daughter's child? You wouldn't now, would you? Anytime either Arizona or Sofia was in the same room, you averted your gaze or kept your head down as if your eyes would burn at the mere sight of your daughter's lesbian lover or their bastard child. I don't even know why it surprises me, you refused to acknowledge any of our existence for 8 years!" Callie watched as her mother physically recoiled and tried to reign in her temper. She knew what she said was harsh, but the instant she locked eyes on her mother, the person who is supposed to love and support her more than anyone else in the world, she was reminded of all the times she needed her over the past several years and didn't have her. Glancing to her right, she focused on the woman who was there, who loved her through it all, even when she should have hated her, took a deep breath, gave a slight nod to indicate she was okay and felt the corners of her lips turn upward just a little when pink lips mouthed, 'I love you'.
Lucia felt the words like a slap across the face, but she couldn't deny them. Everything her daughter said was the damnable truth and she was indeed going to say she didn't recognize her own granddaughter. Her own family. There was so much she knew she should say, but the words wouldn't come and seeing the hurt, the anger on her daughter's face, she wasn't sure it would be heard. Trying again, she implored, "Callio…" Callie's head snapped in her mother's direction and she held up her hand as she corrected, "NO!" Realizing she was a little too loud and didn't want to upset her daughter, she lowered her voice and hissed, "You no longer have the right to call me by that name. There are two people in this world who have earned that privilege, they have loved me unconditionally, they have supported me through everything, even my bad decisions, they have been there to pick up the pieces over and over again, and while my mother should be one of those people, she was nowhere to be found." Lucia nodded her head, looked around the lobby where they had gained the attention of a few guests and tried again, "Callie, can we go somewhere more private and discuss this, please?" Callie looked at Arizona who quirked her eyebrow in question, letting her know it was her decision, then over at her daughter who was watching her carefully, then back at her mother who seemed more than uncomfortable and responded, "No. You said your piece 8 years ago and your actions since then have supported your feelings. My family and I have had a long, wonderful day together at the zoo and now Arizona and I need to take our daughter home, feed her, bathe her, read her a story, and let her know she is loved and cared for because we are her mothers and that's what mothers do." Without another word, she walked across the lobby, scooped her daughter up in her arms and waited for Arizona by the door.
Arizona looked at the woman in front of her, the woman who had the same emotion filled eyes as her lover and her own daughter and because she could read their eyes so well, she recognized the pain and longing she saw in the older Latina's dark brown orbs. Hoping she wasn't wrong and she would be heard, she finally spoke the words she had been longing to say to this woman, "Every mother has a dream for their daughter. Ours is that Sofia grows up happy and healthy knowing she is loved and supported no matter what. Yours was that Calliope grew up, got married, had children, and led a successful life." Glancing over to see her girlfriend holding their daughter, she thought of their conversation from the other day and continued with more passion, "She did all that. She has an amazing, beautiful, intelligent daughter who is a wonderful mixture of all of her parents, she is a world-renowned surgeon at the top of her field, she is light-years ahead of anyone else in her research, she has invented artificial cartilage and robotic legs, she has saved countless lives…including mine, she is part owner of one of the country's leading teaching hospitals, she owns her own medical center, she is an outstanding mother who imparts her heritage and her history to our child who soaks up every bit of it that she can and she's the best partner anyone could ask for and most times, I wonder how in the world I deserve her. But you can't see any of that. You will never know the strong, loving, supportive, passionate, compassionate, funny, loyal, spiritual person she has become, because you can't look past the fact that the person she fell in love with isn't a man. You don't see the people she's helped, the lives she's saved, the person she's become, the talent she has, that her hopes and dreams have been fulfilled despite insurmountable odds. You look at her and see your own dreams for her that haven't come to fruition. You look at her and see a sinner, someone you won't see in heaven because of who she loves, because she didn't do things the way you believe she should have. I don't believe in God Mrs. Torres, but I believe in Calliope and if there is a God, I refuse to believe that the God she believes in wouldn't allow her in heaven because she loves me. Your beliefs have led you down the path of righteousness, but you've missed so very much, including the love of those two people over there, and let me tell you, their love…being loved by Calliope and Sofia is a feeling unlike any other in this world or the next and you are truly missing out." With that, Arizona joined her family and left the older woman standing in the middle of the lobby, broken shopping bag forgotten by her feet.
Callie stood near the door with Sofia watching as Arizona spoke to her mother giving what she could only assume was one of her infamous heartfelt Arizona Robbins speeches. Given the look on her girlfriend's face, she almost wanted to feel sorry for the older woman on the receiving end, but she knew whatever was being said, was in her defense and her heart swelled with love and pride once again. When Arizona approached, Callie wrapped her free hand around her shoulder, pulled her into her side, kissed her on her temple and whispered, "Thank you." Arizona wrapped her arm around her waist, gave her a sad smile, knowing how hard this was for Callie, and said, "I love you Calliope Torres." Callie looked down into sparkling blue eyes, saw her entire future looking back at her, bent forward to brush their lips together and responded, "I know and I love you too Arizona Robbins." Not wanting to be left out, Sofia who was still being held by Callie, put her arms around both mothers' necks pulled them into her and said, "And I love you too Mama Torres and Mommy Robbins," causing both women to chuckle, effectively lightening their somber mood. Callie nuzzled her little girl's neck making her giggle and responded, "We love you too Sofia Robbin Sloan Torres." They turned and left the hotel, never realizing their little interaction had been observed by watery brown eyes.
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"Uno!" Sofia squealed excitedly and bounced up and down in her chair. Callie eyed her daughter suspiciously and argued, "No way! I just made you draw four, how did you get rid of them so fast?" Sofia giggled and said, "I'm just that good mama. You're goin' down!" Callie stared at her daughter in disbelief and looked to Arizona who was biting her bottom lip trying to hide her laughter. Pointing her finger she accused, "I blame you for this competitive streak!" Arizona gasped, "Are you kidding me? Who was the one who went around the entire hospital trying to psych everyone out, including me?" Callie shrugged nonchalantly and claimed, "I don't know what you're talking about." Arizona scoffed and Sofia huffed in annoyance, "Would you just play your card so I can win and pick what we are having for dessert?" Arizona just shook her head, she knew both of her opponents were ruthless and as she was next after Callie who only held two cards, one of which she knew was another draw four because she accidentally dropped it, she didn't want any retaliation but she knew it was coming. She was losing as it was and didn't need more points added to her score. Callie looked at the blue 5 on the table and the blue 2 in her hand next to the draw four. If she played by the rules, she'd have to play the blue card and hope Sofia's next card didn't put her out of the game. Squinting her eyes, she sighed in defeat and laid down the blue card and declared, "Uno". Arizona breathed a sigh of relief then looked at her cards and nearly groaned out loud. The only blue card she had was a reverse card. Looking to Sofia, she mouthed, "I'm sorry", then laid down the card that would make her girlfriend insufferable for days. Callie saw the look of regret in Arizona's eyes and let out a whoop when she saw the blue card with two arrows being laid down in front of her. Slamming down the draw four onto the pile, she raised both hands in victory and shouted, "Yes! I am still undefeated."
Sofia sat in her seat and scowled at both parents unsure which one she was more upset with at the moment. Her mommy at least looked like she felt bad, though she was having a hard time trying not to laugh at her mama who was now dancing behind her chair. She couldn't help but smile herself even though she didn't get to pick dessert. It was good to see mama happy again. When they first left the hotel and all during the drive home, both of her moms seemed upset and didn't say much. She also heard her mama talking to someone in Spanish in the back yard as soon as they got home. Mama only talked in Spanish when she was mad. They both seemed a little better after everyone showered and they had pizza. By the time mommy suggested they play a game, everything seemed normal again. Finished with her victory dance, Callie clapped her hands together and said, "Hmmm what do I want for dessert? Broccoli? Cheese and crackers? Ooooh how about ice…" She stopped and watched as her daughter perked up with excitement and continued, "…berg lettuce cut up for a salad." She laughed out loud when Sofia slumped in her seat, winked at Arizona and finally asked, "Mommy, do we still have those ice cream sandwiches grandpa left behind?" Arizona smiled at her girlfriend then said, "You know, I think we do. They are hidden behind the frozen vegetables." Callie looked to Sofia and asked, "What do you think? Ice cream sandwiches?" Sofia tried not to look overly excited in case her mama changed her mind, shrugged, and offered, "You're the winner." Callie laughed and walked to the freezer and declared, "Ice cream sandwiches it is, then off to bed with the little miss." Sofia smiled her mini-mega-watt smile and agreed, "Deal."
Walking to the freezer to dig out the sweet treats, Callie felt lighter than she had since they left the hotel. She knew all she needed was a little time with her family, to be around the people who could make her laugh and smile with their infectious giggles and adorable dimples. Getting over the disappointment she felt at not having her mother around was getting easier, but she still felt that dark cloud looming and knew she would have to face those feelings sooner or later. Knowing it would get bad if she didn't, she promised herself she wouldn't hold it in, that she would talk about it with her girlfriend and possibly her therapist. Finally finding what she was looking for, she grabbed three frozen sandwiches, smiled brightly, and made her way back to her family determined to end their dwindling day on a happy note.
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Callie sat behind Arizona on Sofia's bed with her chin resting on her shoulder as they both looked down at their sleeping daughter. They had finished reading her story several minutes ago and she was fast asleep long before that. While they would normally bookmark the page and sneak out once the little girl was asleep, they both felt the need to remain in the room, soak up these little family moments while they still could. Callie tightened her grip on Arizona's waist, looked at her daughter's angelic face, inhaled deeply and was inundated with the aroma she could only describe as being home. The combined scents of apple, vanilla, and sandalwood seeped into her soul and soothed the ache that still resided in her heart. It had only been a few hours, but being with her family, with the people who loved her the most in this world, the two people she knew she never wanted to live without again, it gave her a sense of belonging that far outweighed what she ever felt in her own childhood or her own family for that matter. Linking her fingers with Arizona's she whispered, "Promise me, no matter what happens, who she brings home, who she loves, what she chooses to do with her life, promise me we will love her, accept her, and never turn her away. Promise me…" Arizona could hear the tremor in Callie's voice, she knew she was about to break, she had been waiting for this all evening. Without saying a word, she stood up, kept their hands entwined, and led Callie from their daughter's room closing the door behind them.
Once they reached the open living room, she dimmed the lights in the dining room and guided Callie to the sofa. Arizona was prepared to take the seat next to Callie but wasn't at all surprised when she was tugged onto her lap. This was their thing now, when they needed to give or take comfort and if she were being honest, there's no place she'd rather be in that moment. Sitting sideways, Arizona stretched her feet across the cushions, looked into sad brown puppy dog eyes and her heart broke for her girlfriend as a lone tear made its way down a soft tan cheek. Wiping the tiny bit of moisture away, she tilted her head and asked quietly, "Do you want to talk about it?" Callie shrugged her shoulders and said, "I don't know." Full red lips quivered and Arizona could see how hard Callie was trying to be strong, to hold it together, she could see the tears welling in her eyes, feel her body tremble beneath her. She held out both arms and said, "Come here baby. It's okay, let it out." Callie wrapped her arms around Arizona's middle, pulled her closer, nuzzled her face into her neck and finally let go. She could feel the hot tears running down her cheeks and being soaked up by Arizona's shirt, but in that moment all that mattered was that she felt safe in the arms of the woman she loved and let out 8 years of pain, anger, frustration, and sadness.
After several minutes of rocking them back and forth and whispering calming words while Callie sobbed uncontrollably, Arizona finally felt her girlfriend settling down. Kissing the top of her head, she ran her fingers across the light stubble and watched as her gorgeous facial features started to relax. Allowing her eyelids to flutter closed, Callie leaned into Arizona's touch, slipped her hand under the hem of her t-shirt to rest on the bare skin of her abdomen, and let out a sigh of relief as she finally felt herself calm down. Feeling Arizona's touch, her warmth, her love encompass her was like a balm to her battered soul. She had done her best to hold it together for Sofia, but now she didn't have to and she actually felt better for having let it out. They sat together in silence for a few minutes before Callie said, "I thought there was an emergency, I was watching your face to see if I needed to call 911. I knew the minute you looked at her…something was off. Once I realized who she was, it's like I felt so cold inside, every feeling I thought I would feel when I saw her again just rushed through me. I felt like that scared little girl who wanted to please her mother, then I had this vision of us standing in our apartment, the veil on my head and her telling me she wouldn't see me in heaven, and I felt the pain for all the times that I needed her and she wasn't there, then I heard what she said to you. She said our daughter reminded her of her youngest and she said it with so much love…like, like…like she talked to me every day, and then it hit me, she didn't know you, she didn't know Sofia. She didn't know her own daughter's family and I was just overcome with so much anger. But even as I sit here and realize I didn't let her talk…I feel…guilty. I can't help but wonder, what would she have said? I just, I reverted to the old me. I automatically assumed that what she had to say was going to be hurtful, so I attacked first and didn't let her talk."
Arizona expected the guilt, the questions, but not the reflection, the self-realization and her heart broke for her girlfriend all over again as she saw the various emotions swirling in those beautiful sad eyes. Lowering her head to make eye contact, she asked, "Do you want to know what she was going to say?" Callie shook her head and replied, "I know what I wanted her to say…and…and I hate myself for it. I hate that even after all this time, I want her to come back, to be a part of our lives. But…I saw the surprise, the shock on her face. I just…I'm almost certain nothing has changed." She shook her head trying to get the image of her mother out of her mind. Seeing the struggle, Arizona kissed each cheek and said, "You know I will support you in whatever you want to do. If you want to call the babysitter and go back to that hotel and see her tonight, I'll be right next to you holding your hand. If you never want to see her again, then we keep going just as we have been and get through this like we always do, together." Callie brought her hand up and tucked an unruly blonde curl behind a soft pale ear, cupped Arizona's cheek and whispered, "I love you. Do you know that?" Arizona rolled her eyes toward the sky as if she had to think about it, looked back into cloudy brown eyes, winked, smiled, and said, "You may have mentioned it once or twice." Callie closed her eyes briefly, let out a sigh, smiled sweetly and pulled Arizona toward her to connect their lips in a soft loving kiss.
Realizing she never asked, Arizona questioned, "What did your dad say? Did he know she was going to be there?" Callie sighed, "He said he knew she had a speaking engagement here later this week. Apparently she came early to take a few days off and relax. He apologized profusely and said if he had known she was there today, he would have had his lawyer come to me." Arizona furrowed her brow and asked, "If she was going to be there, why didn't he just have her sign the papers?" Callie let out a deep breath and explained, "She can't sign anything, not for that hotel." At Arizona's questioning look, she asked, "Do you remember how I told you daddy gave me some of my inheritance early and I used it on the house?" Arizona nodded and Callie continued, "For the past few years, he's been moving money into my and Sofia's trust funds, putting my name on certain holdings and properties, and when I moved to New York, he named me as beneficiary and put my name on the paperwork for The Aria. I can sign off on things, but I need a notary at this point if it's a financial decision. He has never said why he's doing all this, but it doesn't take a genius to figure it out. With the way they've disowned me, I think he's worried that Aria and my mother would find a way to keep me from my share of the inheritance if something were to happen to him. I mean, they are both lawyers. He's trying to make sure we are taken care of." Arizona took in that information, she wasn't certain Lucia could be that vindictive, but she couldn't ever imagine a mother not seeing their child or grandchild for nearly a decade either.
Realizing she hadn't said anything yet, she blinked a few times and breathed out, "Wow." Callie smiled ruefully and said, "Yeah. We don't talk about them. I mean, we kind of have this silent agreement, I don't ask about them and he doesn't offer information. I'm sure it's the same way with them. You'd think she'd have seen pictures of Sofia at least, but…I don't know. Part of me doesn't want to know, ya know. If she has asked to see pictures, if she's curious, why doesn't she come out and meet her? Then the other side of me thinks she doesn't care enough to ask. Either way it goes, I get mad and hurt all over again if I let myself think about it too long." Arizona nodded in understanding then said quietly, "I promise." Callie raised her eyebrow in question and Arizona immediately brought her hand up to smooth it out and explained, "I promise, no matter what happens, we will never make Sofia feel like you have felt. She will always be healthy and safe, well taken care of and loved…" Callie smiled and finished "…because we are her mothers." Arizona winked and teased, "Don't think I didn't catch that earlier Torres."
Callie smirked and defended, "Hey, I haven't stolen a speech in a week or two, that seemed like the best time." She then tilted her head and asked, "Speaking of which, what did you say to her?" Arizona smiled, shrugged her shoulder and answered, "I just imparted some of my awesome wisdom and told her how wonderful and amazing you are and that she was missing out by not seeing that." Callie shook her head and chuckled then asked, "So you gave her the Arizona Robbins special like you did my dad huh?" Arizona nodded and joked, "Oh, way better than what I said to your dad. I was still a little afraid he would shove me against a wall. I figured I could take Lucia. I mean, between her age and my leg, it would be a fair fight." Callie let out a bark of laughter at just the image and was already starting to feel better, then retorted, "Well in that case, I'm sure she will be knocking on our door at any time." Arizona smiled, caressed Callie's cheek and added seriously, "One of the things I have always loved about you is that you have no idea how truly amazing you are. You have done so many great things and you mean so much to so many, but you are so humble and down to earth and just so very easy to love. I know it hurts baby and nothing I can say or do can fix that, but you aren't alone and she truly is the one who is missing out." Callie brought her hand up to rest on Arizona's and responded, "You do though, you make it better. You make me better and I love you so so much." Arizona connected their lips in a soft kiss and returned, "I love you too."
The two sat quietly just holding one another enjoying the time alone before they had to go back to work in the morning. Looking up and noticing it was still quite early, Callie asked, "Are you tired?" Arizona looked up into clear brown eyes, thankful the storm had passed for the moment at least and responded, "Not really. Which is surprising given this is the longest we've been still for a few days." Callie shivered just thinking about some of the activities that took up a great deal of their weekend then asked, "What do you say to a movie, popcorn, and more cuddles? We haven't done that in a while." Arizona smiled and nodded her head, "I think that sounds like an amazing way to finish up our weekend." Callie tapped a slim hip indicating she wanted to get up and suggested, "I'll get our favorite blanket and the snacks, you pick the movie." Arizona tilted her head and asked, "Parameters?" Callie smiled and said, "No Disney, no death, no gore." Arizona huffed and pouted, "Well that just cut my choices in half." Callie stood, kissed her nose and said, "I'm sure you'll find something." She squealed when Arizona pinched her ass and headed off to the bedroom to find their blanket.
Just as Arizona turned and started to arrange the throw pillows on the couch so they could lie down, she heard a soft knock at the door. Furrowing her brow, she walked into the foyer and looked out the thin window by the front door to see if she could identify the visitor. Her heart started racing when she realized who it was. Looking toward the bedroom, she took a deep breath, unlocked and opened the door and was greeted by the cautious smile of Lucia Torres. She watched as anxious eyes darted around her surroundings and frail fingers twisted themselves into knots and smiled internally as she immediately recognized the actions that were inherent in both her girlfriend and her daughter. Keeping her voice level and her face impassive, she asked, "May I help you?" The older woman attempted a more genuine smile and offered, "I know…I don't deserve your hospitality…but I was hoping I might speak with you…both of you." Arizona blinked her eyes and furrowed her brow in confusion, this was certainly the last thing she expected when she opened the front door. Before she could say a word, Callie appeared from the bedroom saying, "Hey honey, I forgot that blanket was on the couch last night and needs washing so I brought the quilt your mom made us for our first…" Her voice trailed off as she walked further into the room and saw Arizona standing at the open front door with her mother. Her mood instantly souring, Callie couldn't control the harshness in her voice as she asked, "What are you doing here?" Lucia took in the appearance of both women who were obviously dressed for bed, if not for comfort, her daughter in sweatpants and a tank top and Arizona in yoga pants and a long t-shirt. Feeling even more as if she were intruding, Lucia looked down at her hands and tried again, "I know it's late to be receiving guests, but I…you always had a strict bedtime and I assume coming from a military family you did as well, Arizona and I thought Sofia would… I didn't want to upset your daughter's routine, so I came when I figured I could speak to the two of you alone." It wasn't just her mother's presence, that unnerved Callie, but also her vulnerability. This woman who always seemed to have such a grand presence appeared so small, so meek in that moment.
Lucia stood in the doorway of the beautiful home and watched as startled blue eyes snapped to equally surprised brown and the two young women appeared to be holding a silent conversation. Callie stood at the entryway to the foyer with a death grip on the well-used quilt as it was the only thing grounding her at the moment. Looking into Arizona's eyes, the only thing she could think of was the words she said jokingly not even twenty minutes before about her mom showing up on their doorstep. She watched as a little twinkle appeared in concerned blue eyes and realized her girlfriend was thinking the same thing. She wanted nothing more than to think, to hope, her mother had come to their home with only the best of intentions. With a barely perceptible nod from Callie, Arizona pushed the door open wider, stepped aside and invited, "Come in, please. Can I get you something to drink? Coffee or tea maybe?" Lucia offered a genuine smile and accepted, "Tea if it wouldn't be too much trouble." Arizona returned the smile and replied, "No trouble at all. Calliope?" By the look on her girlfriend's face, she could use a shot of tequila, but in lieu of that informed, "I'll put some coffee on too." Callie smiled, reached out and gave her fingers a squeeze, then murmured, "Thank you." Arizona slipped into the kitchen and worked as quickly as she could, not wanting to leave Callie alone for too long. Filling both the coffee pot and tea kettle, she got them started and looked back into the living room to find Callie seated on the sofa and Lucia walking around the living room looking at pictures, neither saying a word.
Lucia looked at the collage of older pictures, the frames filled with newer memories, taking in the people who filled her daughter's life over the past several years. She could see the progression of each year of Sofia's life, her daughter's life, and her heart ached at the memories she will never be a part of other than her glaring absence. She couldn't help but notice there were several pictures of the two women as a happy couple when they were younger and the newer frames capturing recent memories, but there was a clear gap, she wasn't certain how long it was, but she knew there was a divorce or separation of at least a couple years. She saw pictures of the man she recognized as Sofia's father and recalled there was also a death stemming from a plane crash which Arizona herself survived. Her heart ached again recognizing she didn't know any of this firsthand, she half-heartedly listened as her husband pleaded with her to reach out to their daughter in her time of need. But she couldn't force herself to do it, how would it appear as anything but hypocritical? How could her daughter even forgive her? Would she even want her with her at such a time? Her attention was drawn to the larger picture at the center of the collage where two women in wedding dresses stood holding one another, looking into the other's eyes, huge beautiful smiles on both faces and tears stung the backs of her eyes as she realized that was the day after the last day she laid eyes on her daughter, shortly after condemning her to hell and walking out of her life.
Hearing a throat clear behind her, she turned to see Arizona had returned with a tray of drinks. She watched as Callie dumped several heaping spoons full of sugar into one cup of coffee, poured a splash of cream, stirred it, then handed it off to Arizona who smiled gratefully and kissed her cheek. She then set about preparing her own cup with far less sugar. Arizona looked up to see their guest still standing and invited, "Please, take a seat, I wasn't sure if you wanted lemon, but we have some if you'd like me to get it for you." Lucia smiled at the woman's offer, took a seat in the recliner opposite the couple and replied, "No, thank you, milk and honey is perfect." Arizona nodded then sat back and smiled when Callie placed her hand on her leg. Seeing that her hosts were waiting for her to speak, Lucia took a sip of her tea and sent up a silent prayer asking for strength and guidance, cleared her throat and began. "I deserved everything you said to me today. That and more actually." At the two shocked expressions, she continued before she lost her nerve, "I don't know, I can't honestly say if or when I would have gathered the courage to come here, to talk to you, if we hadn't run into each other." Callie scoffed, shook her head and opened her mouth to say something and immediately closed it when Arizona tightened her grip on her hand encouraging her to just listen. Lucia lifted her cup to her mouth primarily to hide the smile that crossed her lips realizing just how easily Arizona could tame the beast that lived within her daughter.
Taking a small sip of her tea, the older woman continued, "It's not that I haven't wanted to, that I haven't thought about it many many times…I just…" She trailed off, waved her hand as if to dismiss herself and said, "Well, that's neither here nor there." At the confused expressions on both women's faces, she looked to Arizona and explained, "You were right. What you said earlier. Every parent has hopes and dreams for their children. It was my hope that my daughter would grow up, get married, have children, and lead a successful life." Seeing that both women were about to argue, she quickly continued, "The day she was born, I immediately envisioned her future, growing up, getting married, having children. But what I lost sight of was the happiness. What a true marriage was. I wanted her to marry someone who would take care of her, protect her, love her with every fiber of their being. I wanted her to marry someone she never wanted to be apart from, someone who challenged her, completed her, complimented her, understood her, tamed her inner demons. I wanted her to find someone who she loved and defended and put above anyone else. I wanted her to find a partner, a best friend, the other half of her soul." Callie and Arizona looked at one another, both certain the woman didn't intend to, but described what they felt about the other perfectly.
Seeing the soft smiles the two women shared, again only seeing one another, she continued, "I…don't know if either of you are aware, but Callie, when you spoke to me, you only mentioned how I treated Arizona and Sofia. You never once spoke of the pain I caused you." She looked to Arizona and said, "You Arizona, you did the same thing, you only spoke of Callie and Sofia, but what's more, you didn't scold me for how I treated them, you only told me of the things I was missing, of what I had done to myself by not being in their lives." Seeing she was being heard, Lucia continued, "When the two of you walked away today, I watched you. I watched how loving and happy your family was, how you innately gravitate to one another. I saw it then, I saw it when you first answered the door…how you communicate with just a look, and I see it now in how you touch and look at each other. I realize now, Arizona, you were also correct when you said she has that. Callie, you have found everything I wanted for you and more, you found the person I always envisioned for you, I just…I couldn't get past my beliefs, my prejudices, my own pride, to understand that it doesn't have to be a man. I've learned and realized a great deal over the years but I believe I learned my biggest lesson today." Lucia trailed off and allowed her words to sink in.
Callie stared at her mother unblinking. She was afraid to breathe, to move, for fear that the fog would lift and she'd be staring at an empty chair. She almost couldn't believe what she was hearing. She didn't want to believe it. She had spent so many years hoping for this exact moment. Swallowing the lump in her throat, Callie looked to Arizona then back to her mother and asked, "And what was that?" Lucia took a deep breath and tried to figure out how to word what she wanted to say and explained, "This beautiful, well behaved, helpful little girl appeared in front of me and the only thought I had was how much she reminded me of you Callie and it made my heart hurt with missing you. Then, when she thought I was ill, she was so concerned but lit up when she proudly told me her parents were doctors and quickly called for her mommy, and you came rushing over Arizona, you were smiling and so willing to assist a stranger. My only thoughts, the only thing I could think of was how lovely these strangers were and how I'd like to get to know them better." Both women stared at her as she shared her own version of what happened earlier in the day, then Callie stated flatly, "Then I showed up." She watched as her mother's eyes filled with sorrow. Lucia nodded and continued, "Then you showed up and your voice was so filled with pain and anger and I looked at you and took in all of your changes and as I watched the three of you, I appreciated how the two of you defended and supported each other, how clearly you belonged to one another, how carefully your daughter watched you, how you were such a solid family unit, I realized these three strangers in front of me, these three people I didn't even recognize…were my family. This beautiful girl and this lovely woman who I was willing to accept as strangers…I turned away as my family and because of my…judgmental views, because of my stubborn mindset, because of my outdated understanding of the world, I missed nearly a decade of your lives. I wasn't there when you all needed me most. I…I can never say how sorry I am, I can never tell you enough how ashamed I am of my behaviors, of my harmful words and actions. I don't even feel as though I deserve your forgiveness, but…that's why I am here. I am here asking both of you to forgive me, to allow me the opportunity to share in the rest of your lives and not miss another memory without my entire family." She paused looking at the two dumbfounded women on the couch staring back at her with open mouths and added nervously, "If…if you want to…however you want to…um…we can go slow."
Callie took Arizona's hands, intertwined their fingers, and turned to cerulean blue eyes to search for the answers she needed. She knew if she saw even the slightest bit of doubt, worry, or concern, she would ask her mother to leave, it would hurt, but Arizona's feelings were just as important as her own because her mother didn't just reject her, she rejected Arizona and Sofia as well. Arizona knew how important this was to Callie and though her biggest fear was she would get hurt again, she kept that to herself and did her best to convey all the love, support, and understanding she was feeling in that moment to the woman she loved. Smiling softly, she winked, and gave a slight nod letting Callie know whatever she decided to do, she would support her. Callie closed her eyes, took a deep cleansing breath, nodded once as well, then turned to look at her mother who was staring intently at her teacup as if she didn't want to intrude on their silent conversation.
Callie took a drink of her coffee to fortify herself and finally answered, "If I let you in…if WE let you in…it's not just my heart or Arizona's that would be hurt. Sofia was too young before, but now…she's this amazing tiny human with a mind of her own. She has this huge loving heart and if she loves someone, she loves them forever. If we let you in, you have to promise to put her heart first, to care for her and love her no matter what your beliefs are. If you change your mind about us…you have to still love her, be there for her, and above all else, keep your opinions about us to yourself. We won't have anyone making her think her parents are doing anything wrong for loving each other. I've changed, I keep changing, there are things I am just figuring out, so I'm letting you know up front, right now, I'm not the person you walked away from 8 years ago. If you want to be a part of our lives, you accept us all as we are." Lucia looked at her daughter, though she could clearly see the physical changes, many of the others were making themselves known, first and foremost, this fierce protector, her daughter always stuck up for the underdog, but this was different, she had become a wife, a mother, and she wouldn't let anything or anyone hurt her family if she could help it. She smiled proudly as she recalled Arizona's words, Calliope had indeed made her own dreams come true and on her own terms, just like she had done everything else in her life. She leaned forward and set her teacup back on the tray, stood from her seat, walked to stand in front of her daughter and said, "I wouldn't have it any other way." Callie sat looking up at her mother, still in disbelief, glanced over at Arizona, and when she felt the nudge to her ribs, set her cup down as well and stood face to face with her mother.
Lucia held out both hands palm up and waited nervously for her daughter to take them. Callie looked down at the hands that seemed so familiar yet so foreign at the same time, saw the slight tremor and wondered if it was from age or nerves and decided in that moment, it didn't matter and reached out and took her mother's hands for the first time in 8 years. Tears immediately sprung to both sets of dark chocolate eyes and Lucia restated, "I am so sorry I waited so long mija, I accept you and your family as you are because you are my daughter and that's what mothers do." Callie let out a half sob half laugh and pulled her mother into her, uncertain who was crushing who in that moment. Arizona sat silently on the sofa, hot tears streaming down her face at the precious reunion between mother and daughter. The look on Callie's face was unlike one she had ever seen before, she looked so much like their daughter in that moment, so childlike, so happy, and it just filled her heart to see that this one burden she had been carrying for so long was finally lifting, this wound could start healing. She was broken from her thoughts by two hands being held out to her, one that she knew as well as her own and the other was the older, more fragile version of that same hand. Looking up, she saw identical dark brown eyes watching her hopefully. Taking both hands, she stood as well and looked at Lucia as she said, "Arizona, I owe you an apology as well. I am truly sorry I never gave you a chance, I never looked beyond the fact that you were a woman nor did I try to get to know the real you. I hope you will be able, in time, to forgive me and allow me the honor of knowing who you are." Arizona took a deep shaky breath, looked to Callie who was looking back at her with anticipation and replied, "You are already forgiven. The greatest harm that was done to me was watching Calliope hurt. If she forgives you and welcomes you into our family, then I do as well." She let out a small squeal when she was sandwiched between the two women both whispering, "Thank you," in either ear.
After checking on Sofia, Arizona returned to the living room to see Callie and her mother looking at the photographs on the wall as Callie pointed to different events in their lives and described them to Lucia. Walking up behind Callie, she rested her chin on her shoulder and joined in on the story telling. After another few minutes, Lucia noticed the time and declared, "I really should be going, I am certain you two have work in the morning. Thank you both for…just thank you. You have a lovely home, maybe we can get together for lunch or something before I head home." Callie nodded, instantly feeling nervous again. A large part of her was afraid that her mother would leave and change her mind. Looking at Arizona, she watched as she pursed her lips, and nodded her head in her mom's direction. Realizing what she wanted her to do she said, "Uh, mom?" Lucia pulled her keys from her purse and looked up to see her daughter doing her little pee dance and smiled softly waiting for her to finish. Callie looked back at Arizona who smiled and nodded and offered, "We uh…since you'll be in town this week, we have this family tradition of taco Tuesdays and uh, if you'd like, maybe you can come for dinner, make your famous enchiladas and meet Sofia?" Lucia's face broke into a beautiful smile reminiscent of her daughter's and granddaughter's and responded, "I'd love to join you for dinner. You can reach me at the hotel, or…my number's the same if you…" "I still have it." Callie confirmed with a soft smile. She smiled again when her mother opened her arms and pulled both her and Arizona in for one final hug. Pulling back, she caressed a tan and pale cheek at the same time and said, "Good night girls."
Callie watched as her mother pulled away, closed and locked the door, turned, and fell into Arizona's waiting arms, letting out a huge sob. Arizona rubbed soothing circles on Callie's back but made no other attempt to calm or soothe her. She knew these tears did not stem from pain or grief but from relief. These tears were a release of all the tension and stress that had built up throughout the day and the evening. They both knew while the most difficult part was over, the rebuilding of an already tenuous relationship would not be easy and they still had to explain to Sofia the sudden reappearance of a grandmother who was never spoken of. Pulling back just slightly, Callie kissed Arizona's forehead and whispered, "Thank you." Arizona squinted her eyes and scrunched up her nose and asked, "For what?" Callie caressed her cheek and responded sincerely, "For what ever you said to her, for supporting me, for defending me, for loving me." Arizona wrapped her arms around Callie's neck, kissed her softly and responded, "I will always support you, defend you, and love you. You're mine and I protect the things I love." Callie smiled, tilted her head and asked, "You're really okay with this?" Arizona let out a deep breath, looked her girlfriend in the eye and answered truthfully, "I am wary, but only because I don't want you to be hurt again and I certainly don't want our daughter to get hurt. But she is your mother, she is a Torres, and she is stubborn, so I know it took a lot for her to come here, say what she said, apologize and ask for forgiveness. I don't think she would have done all of that if she didn't want a relationship with you. I want to trust her and believe her, so I will take a page from your book and I will do that until she gives me reason not to." Callie smiled, kissed Arizona again and whispered, "Thank you, that's all I can ask."
The two made their way to their bedroom turning off lights and checking doors as they went. After washing up and brushing their teeth, they crawled into their own side of the bed and let out a sigh of relief. Arizona released her prosthetic and rested it on the wall between the bed and her night table and turned to find Callie sitting next to her waiting to massage her residual limb. Turning on her side to give her girlfriend more access and a better angle, she closed her eyes and nearly groaned as she felt the muscles relax slowly. Looking up, she saw Callie staring into nothingness and asked quietly, "How are you taking everything?" Snapping back into reality, Callie responded, "I'm not sure it has set in yet. My biggest concern right now is telling Sofia. She's only asked about my mom a few times and all I've told her is we aren't close like you and grandma are." Tilting her head, Arizona asked, "Do you think it would help to talk to Dr. G? Maybe she could give you some advice about that." Callie shrugged, "I had been wondering since we left the hotel if maybe I should call her. You…that would be okay? All of this has brought up a lot of feelings about my mom and not just the whole disowning me thing, the other stuff that you and I talked about before. Now that she's back in my life, I really don't know how she will react to…this." Callie waved her hand up and down her body in explanation. Arizona sat up, took both of Callie's hands in hers and advised, "Then go see her. Of course it's okay and I won't be upset if there are things you can't share with me yet. I just don't want you to feel like this, to hold things in. It doesn't mean you don't trust me or you don't want me to know, it just means you are trying to understand it yourself first. That's what processing is and sometimes we need a professional to help us do that. But if you don't want to go alone, I will go with you. Whatever you need to continue to be happy, to grow, and to feel your authentic self is what I want for you."
Callie raised their joined hands to her lips, kissed the back of Arizona's hand and asked, "What did I do to deserve you?" Arizona repeated the action and replied, "I'll let you know as soon as I figure out what I did to deserve you." Leaning forward, she captured Callie's lips with hers then pulled back and said, "I am so very proud of you Calliope." Callie smiled softly, pulled Arizona down with her and settled her on her chest in their usual sleeping position and whispered, "I'm proud of us. I couldn't have gotten through this day without you." Arizona smirked and argued, "Well, you could have, but the sex wouldn't have been half as hot." Callie chuckled, kissed her girlfriend on the head and said, "Good night my love." Arizona snuggled in tighter and murmured, "Good night tiger."
A/N: Thank you so much for the love and support. I feel like my mojo is returning slowly but surely. No summer school for me this year, so hopefully I can throw in a few surprise chapters soon.
I know there are two camps when it comes to Lucia, some believe she will never come around, and some who believe she will. Obviously I am in the latter of the two (so far). I was fortunate enough that my mother, as old school as she was, accepted me for who I am. I am also a parent and can't imagine anything my daughter could do that would make me disown her. I am also a sucker for a happy ending and want to see Callie and Arizona get theirs.
All characters belong to Shonda and all that, I'm just borrowing them for a little while.