Chapter 21

Almost a week after the "training" trip, Illya was snuggled inside the kotatsu with Berserker, quietly peeling tangerines and popping them into her mouth as Berserker inhaled prodigious amounts of wagashi while reading. Her Magic Circuits had taken some time to recover, even with the Spiritual Healing of the Einzberns, and Berserker had remained dematerialized for a few days before she was fully healed. She was grateful for the time it gave her to rest though, letting her relax a bit after the life-and-death situation marathon she had been through.

However, she hadn't been able to find the chance to ask Berserker about her past up til now, as she had either been in the tank, or drifting in and out of consciousness on her bed for the past week. Now was the first chance she had to actually chat with her Servant. Even as she peeled the tangerine, she opened her mouth to speak.

"Berserker, can you tell me more about yourself?"

An utterly normal question, like something two strangers meeting each other for the first time would say.

"Why the sudden curiosity Master?"

Berserker looked up from her book, vocalizing her words perfectly even with the wagashi stuffed in her mouth making her look like a chipmunk.

"I just, I just want to know more about you. Not as a Master, but as a human. Well, even though you're not human. But still, as someone who I entrusted my life to, and who in turn relied on me, it's only natural for me to want to know more about that person."

It was slightly awkward for her to say since she didn't really have any experience saying something like this to anyone else, but Berserker still got the gist of it.

"Oh, you can also just call me Illya. Master is a bit too, hmm, formal for me."

"Then you can call me Ecchan Ma-, Illya-chan."

"Illya-chan?"

"It's a term of endearment for loved ones in my universe."

"I see…" Illya's cheeks flushed slightly.

"Ah right! That's what I want to know more about, the universe you came from, and the things you've been through. Could you tell me more about them, Ecchan?"

"Hmmmm, where should I start…" Absentmindedly, she stuffed more wagashi into her mouth. Illya couldn't help but let sweat trickle down her forehead as she looked at the state of Ecchan's mouth.

*gulp*

The wagashi disappeared without a trace down her throat, her bloated cheeks returning to normal.

"I wonder if those "Alternium" crystals generate black holes in her stomach." Illya could think of no other reason for the food to vanish so quickly.

In a separate room of the castle, Jubstacheit clenched a piece of paper until his fingers started tearing holes through it.

"How did one Servant start accruing expenses making up almost 10% of our total expenditure? What manner of sorcery is this?"

The accountant homunculi at his side spoke up.

"Going by projected growth rates, she might end up taking up almost 45%-50% of our total budget."

Jubstacheit crumpled the paper into a ball and lit it on fire before tossing it out the window.

"DAMN IT AAAAALLLLLL!"

Back in the room, Berserker finally made up her mind.

"Alright, I'll start from when I was born."

"Did it have to take that long for you to think!" Illya yelled in her mind.

"In a galaxy far, far away…"

It took Berserker most of the day and night as Illya stayed up to listen to her, asking questions whenever her interest was piqued. She learned about the Servant Universe, the Ether Galaxy, the immortality of all its inhabitants, the different particles like Ether, Artorium, Eliza, Gudaguda, the existence of the Dark Rounds and their enemies the Secret Society: Galactic Police Organisation and so much more. By the end of it, Illya's brain was bursting to the brim with useless but interesting facts about a Universe that she would most likely never visit in person.

"Wow, I get it!"

"What did you "get"?"

"That the Servant Universe is a joke universe written to push out new servants for events!"

"What are you talking about Illya? Have you gone mad? Although I agree that the writers could have put more effort into world-building during the first Saber Wars event, in the end they did patch it up with the amazing backstory in Saber Wars II."

Is what they would have said if they could break the fourth wall. Unfortunately, for the moment they could not, and Illya fell asleep at the kotatsu, dreaming about Saber Stars, Sabers and a blue-jersey wearing Ecchan chasing an unidentified red-haired boy with her Necrocalibur.

Far away in a city named Fuyuki, a boy sneezed as he fixed up appliances in the student council room.

"Emiya, are you catching a cold? You've been sneezing quite regularly these past few weeks."

"No, I don't feel sick or anything. Maybe someone's been talking about me a lot recently." The blue haired boy with glasses and a stiff air made a small "Hmph!" as he pushed up his glasses.

"It had better not be that witch Tohsaka. I'm quite sure she can actually curse people just by looking at them. You should be most careful of her."

"Come on Issei, she's not that bad. She's always on good behaviour at school, and she's got amazing grades too. There's no reason to doubt her so much."

"I know, but I just can't shake off that feeling. Well, take care of yourself then Emiya, I'm sorry to bother you with such work and leave, but I still have other duties to attend to as the student council president." The boy called Issei stood up and bowed slightly towards Emiya, with a regretful look on his face, speaking apologetically.

"Don't worry about it. I like helping out after all, and it's not too much trouble for me to do something I'm good at. I'll take them back to their original places after I'm done fixing them all ok?"

"Much appreciated. See you then." The president walked out of the room as the red-haired boy prepared to perform Structural Analysis on the aged machines.