Chapter 37: Proving honor

[23rd – 27th of Frostfall 4E 201]

After we had spent about two weeks at High Hrothgar, the Dragonborn and I had separated. While Fiona was heading towards Ustengrav with her two housecarls, I had found two orphaned saber cat cubs to 'adopt', and I had come back to Whiterun with Mia, the Bosmer Alchemist, former resident of the Alchemist's Shack in the Rift. I had introduced Mia to Arcadia, the city's master alchemist, and she had been hired as assistant on the spot. Back at Jorrvaskr, the Companions had pushed me through lots of exercises during the next days, so that I was really tired and exhausted when going to bed.

Another day started with my usual routine, some morning training and exercising, and a light lunch. Skjor sat next to me, and when we had eaten, he told me:

"Whelp, your time has come, as it seems. Last week a scholar came to us, claiming that he knew where we could find another fragment of Wuuthrad. He seemed a fool to me, but if he's right, the honor of the Companions demands that we seek it out. We have decided that this is going to be your final test and trial."

Naturally I replied that I'd be honored to help with that, and he continued:

"I like your spirit. Do well, and you will be counted among the Companions, no longer a whelp. Farkas will be your Shield-Sibling on this venture. Try not to disappoint, or to get him killed."

"One question, Skjor, before you go – what exactly is Wuuthrad?"

Of course I already knew the answer, but I wanted to check if the local lore here was the same as in the game.

"Wuuthrad is a relic of Ysgramor. Through that weapon, we trace our line straight to the first harbinger of mankind in this land. What fragments we have are displayed in honor, but we always seek more. Farkas will answer any further questions you may have."

Vilkas' brother was already waiting, and although the day was already more than half over, he told me:

"Better get prepared and hurry – I will meet you at Dustman's Cairn!"

"Can I take my cubs with me?"

The Companion shook his head and replied: "It's supposed to be your trial, and you should not have any kind of others around, not even animals."

I understood, and while Farkas was leaving, I quickly brought Hanni and Nanni to Mia, who was happy to take care of them for a day or two. Once I was fully equipped and left the city, I realized that finding the place and getting there safely was part of my trial, and I was happy that I had already purchased a good map. While I had a pretty good idea where the place was, finding a location in a real world was much more challenging than following a quest marker in a game, specifically when the map did not mark your own position like a GPS marker.

This time I paid attention to my environment and made sure that no saber cat or other predator could get close to me while I was on the road. A few wolves tried to hunt me, but I used the opportunity to find out how fast I could run, and, due to my long and strong legs, I could actually outrun them. My frequent jogging exercises in the morning had also helped, for sure.

I had mostly followed the roads and only cut across after the Western Watchtower, and although I had had to stop a few times and consult the map and study the area around me carefully, I still managed to arrive at my target right before dusk. Farkas was already there, of course, and he greeted me:

"You have made it in one piece, whelp, and quite fast, too."

"I may not be the best fighter in the hold, but I can run. So, what are we supposed to do here?"

"Look over there, this is the outer part of a barrow. Out here it's not so impressive, not like Bleak Falls Barrow for instance. But none of us Companions have been inside for a long time."

"So, we expect draugr inside?"

"Aye, that we do, and more. Let's go!"

In we went, and we exchanged the last sunlight outside with the dim torch light inside. After descending a set of stairs, we found three draugr dead next to the stone crypts they had most likely come out from.

Farkas did not like this and said so:

"Looks like someone's been digging here, and recently. Tread lightly."

I replied with a smile:

"I sure will, but how will you manage in your heavy armor?"

He clapped me on my left shoulder and just smiled back.

We proceeded, and all too soon we arrived in that larger chamber with the alcove and the lever inside. While Farkas asked me to search for a way to open the gate which blocked our way forward, I knew what to do and pulled the lever, only to find myself locked in within a second. Farkas came to the gate and told me:

"Now look what you've gotten yourself into. No worries. Just sit tight; I'll find the release."

Naturally, as I knew what would happen, I was not worried at all, and I watched when enemies were coming up; I just relaxed and enjoyed the scene with the bulky Companion turning into a werewolf and eliminating all of them. He was gone for a few minutes, and soon the iron gate blocking me lifted; when Farkas was back, in his armor again, he asked:

"I hope I didn't scare you."

"No, you did not. As a matter of fact, I expected something like that."

"You did? Really?"

"I am a Khajiit, and your smell indicated something in that direction. I smelled the same on Aela when I hunted with her, too, but not on Ria and the other more junior members."

"True – only the Circle have the beast blood. It's supposed to be a secret, but obviously there are a few people knowing or at least suspecting that."

"I imagine that being able to turn can be helpful at times, like you just proved."

"Honestly, it is both a blessing and a curse. Yes, it makes us stronger, but it is sometimes difficult to control ourselves when we are turned. In addition, a true Nord longs to be in Sovngarde after death and not in Hircine՚s hunting grounds."

"By the way, Farkas, those people who attacked you – why did they all wield silver weapons?

"They are the Silver Hand, bad people who don't like werewolves. So they don't like us either."

He refused to elaborate further, and I accepted this for now. After all, I did have some more knowledge of the background, although I had not bothered to read all of the books and listen to all of the dialog when playing the game.

For the next two hours we proceeded side by side, defending ourselves against draugr, more Silver Hand, and some frostbite spiders. Farkas turned out to be scared by spiders, so that I took care of those, but he was very aggressive against the Silver Hand. Finally we arrived in what I assumed to be the final room. There was a large table visible at the other end, on some kind of pedestal, and there were rows of alcoves and coffins along the walls. Farkas was about to walk across the chamber, but I asked him to stop:

"Farkas, maybe we should try to even the odds a little."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I assume that you have been in a few places like this before, right?"

"Aye, I have."

"So, would it be wrong to assume that all or at least many of those coffins will spawn a draugr at some time?"

"Maybe."

"Let's try first if we can get some of them out prematurely."

"And how would you do that, whelp?"

I prepared flames in my hands, approached the first alcove, and cast a short blast of fire against the ground and the coffin – nothing happened. I tried again with the second one, and this time the coffin opened and a draugr stepped out. It was not a very strong one and quickly dispatched, and I went on to the next coffin. Half an hour later I had managed to get a little less than half of the draugr out, and Farkas just hook his head:

"We would have managed all of them!"

"Yes, but not without injuries, I think."

"Okay. It's your trial, and I understand your motivation. So, what now?"

I stepped to the table, admired the rounded wall behind it – I should tell the Dragonborn that there was a Word Wall here! – and picked up the fragment on the table. Naturally, the remaining draugr woke up now, and we got into fighting mode. I had trained with Vilkas a few times, and my way of using the battle axe had improved a little; alternating between short fire blasts from my left hand and powerful swings with my right one I managed quite well, expect for a gash in my right arm I received when I did not pay enough attention and moved out of the way too slowly. The wound was getting very cold, and I suspected that the sword had a frost enchantment. Farkas killed the last of the undead and I sat down to heal my wound as soon as enough magicka had been restored.

"Back to Jorrvaskr!" Farkas called out when we had rested for a few minutes. Did this guy ever sleep?

We easily found the back exit, through one of the empty coffins on the upper level, and found that we had spent almost all of the night in the barrow; the sun was already rising again. I started to yawn, but Farkas was having none of that and insisted that we walk back to the city together right away.

In early afternoon we were back home, and Vilkas was already looking out for us. He nodded when we approached and signaled for us to come to the back yard. The entire group of Companions was gathered there already – how had they known we'd arrive just now? – and Kodlak looked at me proudly. When we had found our places, Kodlak started:

"Brothers and sisters of the Circle, my fellow Companions, today we are going to welcome two new souls into our mortal fold. Both Ria and B'lushona have gone on their trials with their respective mentors; they have endured and shown their value, and they are going to be one of us now, rather than the whelps they used to be for some time. Who will speak for them?"

Vilkas responded first: "I speak for Ria, and I stand witness for her courage and endurance."

Farkas was next: "I speak for B'lushona, and I stand witness for his courage and prowess."

"Would you raise your shield in their defense and raise a sword in their honor?"

Vilkas was first again: "I would stand at her back, so that the world might never overtake us."

Farkas agreed: "And I would stand at his back, fighting for the better together with him."

"And would you raise a mug in their name?"

Vilkas responded: "I would lead the song of triumph as our mead hall revels in her stories."

Farkas smirked and added: "And I would drink with him even when it's only juice rather than proper mead, to have the Bards tell his stories."

There was some laughter around, Ria even giggled for a moment, and I smiled as well. Even Kodlak could not suppress a quick smile, before he continued:

"Then the judgment of this Circle is complete. Their hearts beat with fury and courage that have united the Companions since the days of the distant green summers. Let them beat with ours, so the mountains may echo and our enemies may tremble at the call."

All of the Companions replied together: "It shall be so!"

Well, that had been different for sure, and I was very glad that Ria had been initiated together with me. She was a tough Imperial warrior and surely earned it. While we stood here in the yard, I realized that I knew the Companions around me better than I had had ever known my neighbors and even most of my few friends in my previous life, and I was both proud and happy about that. Of course, joining the Companions had been a mandatory part for almost all of my Skyrim characters, but still – I felt like I had found a family, with Kodlak being our father, Tilma our mother, or maybe grandmother, and the others my brothers and sisters. Yes, I liked it.

Now, with the procedure behind us, I found that I was getting very tired. Farkas and I had done my trial mostly during the night, and while his beast blood probably enabled him to stay awake for a longer time, I sure needed a nap, and thus I went down to my bed to get some sleep.

Farkas woke me for the big banquet in the evening, and I had not had enough sleep at all. Alas, that would have to do for now, and I was looking forward to getting back to sleep later.

After the dual initiation there was, of course, a reason for celebration, and we drunk, ate, talked and sung for quite a few hours. As usual, most of the Companions drank a lot of mead, and Tilma and I were probably the only ones sticking to juices and tea. When I was finally almost about to retire, a courier came in and brought a letter for Ria, and when she had read it, she became pale and excused herself very quickly, running down to the sleeping area. Nobody bothered to check what the problem was, and after ten minutes or so I excused myself as well and went down. Ria was on her bed and sobbing, with her hands covering her face. Slowly I stepped closer and asked her what the problem was. She needed a few minutes to calm down and eventually told me:

"I just got a letter from the man I am sweet on; he lives in Rorikstead. I thought that he really liked me, and I had hoped that we were going to marry some day. He wrote that he is getting tired of me being on some kind of quest almost every time he comes to visit, and he is basically telling me that I'd better quit my work for the Companions or he will not come to see me again."

"Oh Ria, he does not understand that this is your life!"

"Yes, exactly! He does not see me for what I am…"

"...but for what he would want you to be like, but that's not the real Ria."

She sobbed again and nodded.

I was not sure what I could do to comfort her and thus just waited, and when she looked up again, she asked:

"Balu, can I ask a very personal favor, please?"

Of course I nodded, and she told me:

"Can you please hold me during the night? I badly need some comforting, and there is nobody else I'd want to ask this from."

"You want me to get into bed with you and hold you, so that you can sleep and have nice dreams?"

"Yes, that's about it. I know, this is an odd request, and I feel bad about asking that from you; I mean, it's not my habit at all to ask a man – or a male Khajiit, that is – to join me in my bed, but if it would be all right for you… just for sleeping, I mean."

Yep, I had had times as well where having a companion in my bed just to hold me and comfort me would have been nice, and I could understand her motivation, or so I thought at least. I had no idea how this would actually work out, but I nodded:

"It will be an honor and a pleasure for me to hold you and comfort you tonight, Ria."

We prepared ourselves for bed and changed into our nightclothes, which was a thin tunic for Ria and short pants only for me, and then Ria pushed me into her bed, towards the wall, and made me turn around. She pushed her own body into mine, with her back against my chest, so that I was spooning her, and while one of my arms served as her pillow, she pulled the other one around her chest, making sure that it was also lightly touching the underside of her boobs through the tunic.

"Is this comfortable for you?" she asked after some time.

"I think so, yes; it has been some time since I have had a pretty woman in my bed."

She chuckled a little, and we both managed to get to sleep quickly. When I woke up again, Ria was still in my arms and starting to stir; she turned around so that she faced me, pressed a kiss on my cheek and told me:

"Balu, this was one of the nicest things a man has ever done for me, and I do feel so much better today, mostly thanks to you. If I had a thing for Khajiit, you'd be my first choice, that's for sure. Can we still be good friends?"

"Of course we can, Ria, and I will cherish this friendship."

That was quite all right for me. If she had asked me to become intimate with her, I might even have accepted – she was quite pretty, and I liked her a lot after all. However, having her as a good friend was much better. After all, I did not have a clue how intimate relations worked in a Khajiit body, and I wanted to know a woman much better before seriously going in that direction. Even if I had been one of those OP characters depicted in some fan fiction stories I had read, one of those with charms good enough to get almost any woman in Skyrim into their bed willingly, there was no way I'd be going to exploit that. Maybe I was old fashioned, but I did have some moral standards.

We got up now, and I soon met Farkas. He stopped me and said:

"Shield-Brother, I have heard about Ria՚s grief. What you have done by holding and comforting your Shield-Sister without taking advantage of her proved your honor once again; I am proud of you!"

After breakfast I first picked up my cubs again. Mia had taken good care of them, but they were visibly happy to see me again. Once I had thanked Mia for her services I visited Adrianne, the blacksmith at Warmaiden՚s, and as she had some time, she actually offered to give me a few short lessons on forging and smithing. I gladly accepted and managed to create a very crude dagger, further sharpened on the grindstone. I was not proud of my work at all, and although it was good to know that I could operate a forge in general, I was not sure if I was willing to spend time and effort to also produced something useful. While I sweated and worked on the dagger, I noticed that a younger Nord woman was constantly busy at the tanning rack, with a young girl watching and sometimes assisting her. In a break I asked Adrianne about the two, and her reply was:

"Oh, this is Doria, my assistant. She is getting quite good on leather and hide working, including the tanning and all. That's part of the work I don't like so much myself; I prefer the forge. The girl observing her and, I hope, learning from her, is my daughter Silvia. Hopefully she will be able to do both smithing and tanning when she grows up."

"So, why don't you just focus on forge work, if you like it better?"

"I would, but that's not good enough. See, metal smithing is Eorlund՚s specialty, and there's no way I can compete with the Skyforge. My metal is only asked for when Eorlund is too busy or when people ask for a type of metal he does not bother with; after all, most of what he's working with is Skyforge steel. Hide and leather though, he only uses where needed, like for straps and such. He does not do any armor which is not at least mostly made of steel, so that people looking for light armor, mostly made from hide and leather, need to go somewhere else. That's where I come in, and I'm so glad that Doria does most of the tanning and crafting."

That seemed to make a lot of sense. Surely heavy armor was needed a lot by the Companions and probably the soldiers and guards, but normal citizens who needed armor for hunting and such might prefer lighter wear.

While I was here, I had a question for Adrianne:

"I am curious about something. Is there a way to make my leather armor more sturdy, like to prevent wolf teeth from penetrating? I don't want to get heavy armor and want to keep the flexibility, but maybe just using thicker leather or multiple sheets or so?"

"You have come to the right place, my friend. Doria can craft a new armor for you, with thicker and better leather, and some metal chain reinforcements at critical locations. It will be a little bit heavier than what you currently have, but not by much. That will cost you, let's say, 300 septims."

That was quite some money, but affordable for me, and I nodded. Doria took my measurements, and she promised to have the new armor ready in a few days.

[Author's Notes: So, Balu becomes a full member of the Companions after about two months of being a whelp. This 'probation period' is still much shorter than a typical probation period in a company – six months in Germany – but much more reasonable IMO as in the game, where you can easily rush through the entire Companions questline in a week or two.

And yes, if you are looking for a story where the main male character has lots of intimate relations with multiple female characters, this is not the right story for you. I have to admit that I am somewhat disappointed when I see how much attention some of those stories, with an OP male main character charming many females, seem to get, compared to other stories which have, IMO, a much better story line.]