Author Note: A somewhat more comedic take on the goblins and their greed. A quick resolution to the cup. Moving onward.

Hermione, Luna, Neville and Harry were eating their breakfast. Harry smiled at how Hermione's hair had been tamed by Tinky into a wavy brown cascade when she was relaxing, today it was pulled back in a single braided plait. They were going to be visiting the goblins.

"Are we ready Hermione?"
"I believe so. I've got a copy of the Betrothal agreement between Rodolphus and Cygnus Black. Requiring her to produce a child within a year and a day of their marriage or he would forfeit her dowry which is the contents of her personal vault. As you are Lord Black, head of the Black family you can declare their marriage null and void and reclaim her vault contents."

"And you really think she has one of those things?"
"It makes logical sense Harry." Luna said while Hermione nodded, "She was one of Voldemort's most trusted lieutenants, as well as fanatically loyal to him."
"Luna is correct Harry." Albus' portrait said, "Lucius Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange were the top two followers of Tom. That is how Lucius received the diary. Bellatrix has to have one of the other items."
Harry nodded, "Okay. I still don't understand why we don't tell the Goblins and let them deal with it."
"Because the goblins do not care what Wizards and witches do to or with each other as long as the coins continue to fill their coffers." Luna said.

"That seems rather short sighted." Harry said hiding a grin.

Albus chuckled, "I suppose it is because wizards have always thought so little about them."

Neville shook his head, "Small wonder they hate us."
Luna sighed, "They do not hate us. They just have a culture that values material wealth and the acquisition of such wealth above anything else."

"Okay Luna. I'm sorry for having a wee bit of fun." Harry snickered but stopped when Luna kept staring at him with her silvery blue eyes. "So Hermione will present this Rothak with the papers, we'll explain I am claiming the vault of Bellatrix Lestrange, pay the required fees and then investigate the contents."

"Yes and do not forget to negotiate. They find if someone will accept the first offer to be weak and exploitable." Luna pointed out.

"Right never pay more than you have to." Hermione confirmed.

"Okay. Well let's get ready and go."

…...

Harry and Hermione presented their papers to Rothak. He looked them over and sighed.

"Ahh Lord Black are you certain there is no child of this union?"

"They did present any to the Head of the Black family as required by the codices of her duties." Harry firmly said.

Hermione pointed out, "It is impossible to prove a negative. As they have not shown positively that there is a child logically we must continue to act as if there is no child."

"That is sound. I presume you would like this to be handled quietly and quickly?"

"Yes please." Harry said.

"Well the standard legal fees, confidentiality fees, expediting fees. key transfer fee, processing fee, dormant vault reactivation fee and notarization fee all come to 825 galleons." Rothak said with a grin.

"Excuse me? Eight hundred and twenty five galleons? Are you out of your mind?" Luna exclaimed.

"Excuse me? That is giving Lord Black the head of household discount."
"Bah. You are padding your already plush pockets scoundrel. The percentage for those should be at most 275 galleons." Luna brusquely stated as she leaned back imperiously.

"Lord Black do these females speak for you?"

Harry crossed his arms and sticking his nose in the air like he remembered Snape, Draco and Lucius do said, "Yes they do. They have full authority to speak for me."
Rothak looked like he was going to swallow the elaborate mustache he wore. Looking from one girl to the other he asked, "Lord Black what is your relationship with these women?"

Luna snapped her fingers and said, "Rothak. Ta'Lomak."

Rothak frowned, "Snata, Rothak, domax qualim Shya Black."

Luna huffed and said, "Hermione Shymoo." Pointing at her hen pointing at herself she said with narrow eyes glaring at him and a sneer, "Luna Parmaq fo shymoo Hermione."

Rothak's eyes sprung open as he looked between the girls. Hermione had no idea what Luna had said but sat up straighter and looking imperiously at the goblin said, "So about the fees?"

Rothak bowed slightly, "My apologies. I was unaware of who exactly I was dealing with. Perhaps after some revision and application of certain other discounts we can come to the entirely reasonable sum of 680 Galleons."

Luna shook her head, "No that is not at all reasonable. We would be willing to graciously bless you with perhaps 450 Galleons. For our time and trouble in listening to the dull flatulence that is your voice."

"You must understand. I am held accountable to the board of directors for this. I have expenses I must cover. Please understand the value of 590 Galleons is a mere pittance compared to the effort required."
"My condolences honored Rothak. I did not consider those problems. You are right 540 Galleons is a mere pittance that you are fully deserving."
"I feel that we are in accordance here as we have come to understand each other so well Parmaq Luna. What we settling at 565 Galleons."
"Yes billing House Black 565 Galleons for this is a very reasonable deal."

"Then we have an accord?" Rothak said with a toothy smile.

"We have an accord."
…...

They had been granted access to the vault and after some searching found the Cup of Hufflepuff. A brief discussion later they allowed Luna to sketch it before Harry swung the sword cleaving the cup. The spirit that shot out of it screamed and hurled vile invectives at them but otherwise faded harmlessly.

Putting the remains of the cup in a glass display case with the remains of the diary, the four settled down to dinner.

"Luna what did you say to Rothak that made him change his tune?"

"Oh. I explained to him that you were Harry's Matriarch of House Black. The Goblins are a Matriarchal society." Luna said slurping her Udon noodles.

"And that parmaq title you told him?" Harry asked.

"Oh that translates to Pleasure wife."

"Pleasure wife?" Hermione chuckled, "That sounds interesting."
"Does it mean what I think it means?" Harry rolled his eyes teased.

"Not entirely. It means I am the primary wife that serves at the pleasure of the matriarch. It would be my duty to execute any of her husbands that fail to perform his duties satisfactorily. Among other duties she may require."
"Oh. I like that idea." Hermione said with a wide grin.

Harry and Neville shook their heads as Luna just enigmatically smiled.

Review Responses:

DennisUd: Thank you. And yes this Voldemort has got a few marbles short of a game.