Chapter 17
"The T is for Trauma"
Wherever she was, it was quiet and dark, which was kinda nice because her head felt like it was trying to work through mud and molasses all mixed together.
She blinked a few times, trying to clear her vision from the haze that covered it.
But she was struggling, and nothing wanted to work properly.
She could barely make out the ceiling of a hut, and she squinted trying to see anything. Tilting her head, to the side, she jolted at the sight of white hair. Scrambling to sit up, her body shook and she practically fell on her face trying to reach him.
"Inuyasha!" She rasped, her voice barely above a whisper as she dragged herself over him. Her arms shook as she saw the bandages wrapped around his torso. She pressed her hand on his cheek, fingers trembling, because he was so still.
He never slept on his back like this.
Oh God.
She'd done it. She'd killed him.
All that had been a dream, and now she was awake. She hadn't wanted this—she didn't want to wake up like this!
"Inuyasha," she whispered, her eyes watering as she rasped out his name. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
She slumped over on top of him, sobbing as she curled against him, not caring about how much it hurt.
She didn't want to think of what else she'd seen and how much of it had been real.
Inuyasha did not move under her. He did not wake. He did not speak, and in doing so, he could not forgive her.
She buried her face into his chest, scraping her cheek along his bandages.
He was cool to the touch, and she finally lifted her head to look about the room. She needed help. She needed something; she just didn't know what.
It was the shrine.
Behind her were Sango and Miroku, still and pale.
And Kaede, throat slit and laying still upon the ground, her unseeing eye staring at the wall beyond Kagome.
Hina—the creature—whatever it was—was long gone. There were no sounds, no movements from anything except herself. She looked at her friends in the twinkling darkness and felt an astounding emptiness.
Not everything had been a lie, but the truth, perhaps, was worse.
Kagome Higurashi wished, for the first time in her life, that she had not woken up.
She jerked as she woke up, hands lifting to grab onto something, though she wasn't quite sure what it was. Her eyes searched the dim hut as she twisted around in her bedding.
Her clothes clung to her skin, damp with sweat and whatever else.
How had she gotten here? Who brought her here?
What had happened to everyone else?
Inuyasha!
Where was Inuyasha?
Pushing herself up, she strained her eyes to see, frantically searching for anyone that looked familiar.
Her body throbbed, and her head felt like it might explode at any given minute, but she needed to see someone—anyone.
"Kagome?"
She shrieked, spinning on her butt and trying to pathetically scuttle away, only to twist herself into a pretzel with her blanket.
"Kagome?" Sango asked behind her, and she shrieked again.
"Shit! Take it easy." Inuyasha winced, reaching to untangle her feet from the blankets.
She watched him squat at her ankles, ears flickering to the side as he pulled at the blanket she'd managed to wind around her legs. She launched herself at him, tackling him back to the floor as her arms wrapped around his neck.
He grunted, one arm wrapping around her waist.
"You're okay," she whispered. "You're okay." She could feel her eyes starting to water, and the crying threatening to build up in her chest, which already hurt.
"Kagome?" Sango asked again.
"She's fine, Sango," Inuyasha told her, and Kagome twisted around to look at her friend.
Sango was sitting by the fire, still in her bed, and Kagome stared at her for a long moment.
"You're okay?" She squeaked out, eyes scanning over Sango's form trying to detect any injuries.
"Keh, everyone's fine," Inuyasha said, tugging at her blankets, finally freeing her ankles.
"You too?" Kagome asked, whipping her head around to face him.
"I told you, I'm fine," he said, wincing as he leaned over farther. He hissed, straightening up, and Kagome looked at him.
"You're not fine! Where are you hurt?" She asked, and she started patting him down.
"Kagome, stop," he groaned, grabbing her wrists to stop her search. "I'm fine. It'll be healed over in a day or two. So stop before you pull a stitch."
"Kaede took my stitches out already!" She grunted as he refused to let her go, sighing in exasperation.
"Not those, the ones on your arm."
She realized that her forearms were bandaged all the way from wrist to elbow. When had that happened?
Inuyasha, sensing her confusion, released her wrists, letting her look at her arms.
"You got burned," Sango added from behind her, and Kagome glanced over her shoulder at her friend, who hadn't gotten up from her bedding.
That was—that was strange, right?
"Sango? You sure that you're okay? And where's Miroku?" She twisted around the to look for the wayward monk.
"He's asleep," Inuyasha added. "He's been dozing off and on all day."
"Why? What happened?"
Miroku groaned off to the side.
"I purified the youkai possessing you. Sango has a minor injury, and Inuyasha has been overbearingly annoying, so I'm sure he's fine. You have reiki burns and a cut on your arm." Miroku took a small breath. "There. Happy? Great. Now everyone go to sleep. These are conversations for the morning, not the witching hour." Miroku made a noise, before rolling over in his blankets.
"Grumpy little fucker when you're tired, aren't you?" Inuyasha remarked.
"If it wouldn't upset Kagome, I'd purify you right now."
"I'd like to see you—!" Inuyasha let out a hacking cough before clearing his throat.
"Inuyasha! You said you were fine!" She started pushing at his clothes to try and see what was wrong with him. He shoved her hands away, still coughing.
"I am fine!"
"You're coughing! You never cough!" He snagged her wrists after letting out a particularly wet cough, glaring at her.
"I am fine. Let it go!"
"Why won't you just show me? How bad is it?"
"It's not bad," he said. "And it's almost healed anyway."
"But—" she started, and he huffed in annoyance.
A bright flash of light illuminated the frame of the doorway before a ear-splitting crack roared overhead, shaking the very earth.
She squeaked, nearly jumping at Inuyasha, clinging to his haori. His hand settled onto her arm, as he pulled her into his lap.
She remembered what it felt like. She remembered the weight of the tree. The cold pelting of the rain against her skin. What it felt like to breathe when there was nothing but water surrounding her.
A blanket draped around her shoulders, and she pulled it closed.
"You're safe," he told her quietly, and she gave him a singular, tentative nod not looking away from the doorway.
"It's gone, right?" She asked him, and he let out a long sigh.
"Yeah, Miroku got it. It's gone."
She glanced away from the door, looking up at his eyes glinting in the dim light of the dying fire, before another deafening boom of thunder rolled overhead, making her bury her face into his chest like a frightened child. She should be ashamed of herself, but she wasn't.
He rubbed her back with his hand, and she felt the slow drag and pull of sleep surrounding her.
Kagome woke slowly.
And painfully.
It only took her body a moment to register that she was awake.
She was stiff all over, and she groaned at her own consciousness.
"Hey," came a quiet and familiar voice. Her eyes felt like someone had glued them shut, and it took a few hard brushes of her fingers to get them free enough to blink. "You've been out for a while."
She groaned again, and twisted into his chest trying to block out everything that was making her head ache and throb under the weight of merely existing.
"How do you feel?"
"Sore," she rasped, throat raw and aching.
"Yeah, well," he said, shifting her slightly. "You've been through some shit."
He leaned away, grabbing a bottle of water, and holding it to her lips.
"Here, drink some of this."
She drank greedily, letting the coolness of the water soothe her throat. Her fingertips brushed the bottle, helping him hold it in place. He pulled it away after a few moments, and she coughed, wincing at the pain radiating up her chest, slumping back against his arm.
"Everything okay?" She asked, letting her eyes drift closed. It all seemed to hurt less when she closed her eyes.
"We're all fine," he told her.
She hummed, trying not to do too much that would aggravate the aches in her body.
"Hag wants you to bathe as soon as you're able."
The thought of a bath was both appealing and revolting. The idea of rinsing herself off? Idyllic. But the idea of going anywhere without Inuyasha terrified her.
Her lack of response seemed to set off her hanyou's alarm bells.
"What's wrong?"
"Oh, nothing, just—" She felt foolish. It was all over, right? It was all said and done, and nothing could hurt her anywhere again. But it didn't feel over. It felt like it could appear at any moment. It felt like this could be a dream; she could wake up and everyone would be dead again.
"Just what?" He urged, helping her sit up a little more.
"You swear it's all over?" She asked him, and he let out a soft sigh. He was annoyed with her, and she was acting like a scared little girl.
"It's over. Miroku got it all this time. They even went up to the shrine to check. There's nothing left."
She frowned.
"How long have I been asleep?"
"A little over a day," he said. "Kaede said that your reiki was drained."
"Is that why I feel like crap?"
He gave her a slight shrug.
"Dunno. Probably."
He had to be the least helpful person when it came to details.
She tried to shift herself, feeling her arms quake and tremble at her efforts. In fact, had it not been for Inuyasha physically moving her, she probably would've failed.
She had no muscle strength or endurance. In fact, if she tried to bathe, she'd probably drown.
He kept an arm behind her, supporting her, and keeping her upright.
"You're sure that everything's okay?" She asked again, trying to peer around the small hut and figure out why something seemed off.
"Everything's fine," he repeated.
"Where's Sango?" She asked.
"You want Sango?"
"She was hurt, right?" She looked around the hut, head snapping around as she reached up to grab a fistful of his sleeve. "So where is she? Where is Sango?!"
"Kagome, calm down," he started.
"No! No! Where is Sango? What happened to Sango?" She shouted at him, trying to scramble off his lap and away. This wasn't real after all! This wasn't real, and he wasn't real! He wasn't the real Inuyasha!
"Kagome, stop," he reached for her, but she slapped his hand away.
"This isn't real!" She tried dragging herself towards the door, but clawed hands pulled her back against his chest and wrapping around her middle tightly.
"Stop! This is real! It's me! You're awake!" He clutched her to his chest, and she grabbed his wrists as her body slumped in his hold.
"Sango rode Kirara and went to check on the shrine with Miroku and Kaede," he explained. "Okay?"
She sniffled and gave him a small nod.
"I'm awake?" She asked, turning her head to look at him as he dragged her back into his lap.
"You're awake," he confirmed, pulling her close. "It's over, Kagome. I swear it is."
She took a deep breath and swallowing down her fear and concern.
"Do you want me to take you to see them?" He asked. "I can grab the bag so you can bathe. Sango will probably want to come too," he grumbled.
"You'll stay? The whole time?" She asked him and struggled to let go of his sleeves. She stared at his face, silently begging and pleading with him to not let her go.
"I'll stay as long as you want."
"The whole time, then," she answered, letting her head fall forward so that her forehead rested against his jaw. He leaned against her, and she tightened her grip on his sleeves.
"The whole time," he repeated, nudging her head. "Can you sit on your own for a minute? Kaede prepared a bag for you to take. I need to grab it from over there."
Her fingernails dug into his arms as she gripped him to stop him from leaving.
"Don't leave!" She shouted as she felt him shift under her.
It was too risky still. At any minute, everything could just unravel under her fingertips, and she couldn't risk it.
"Kagome, stop," he chided.
She shook her head, clamping her eyes shut against the tears that were threatening to overflow.
"Here," he hefted her up in his arms and walked over to a woven tote bag in the corner, resting her on his knee as he swung the bag up on his shoulder. She wrapped her arms around his neck, as he shifted her again and stood with ease. "Let's go check on everyone and then we get you cleaned up, alright?"
She didn't answer, instead she opted to hold onto him as he moved them outside into the sun. She blinked, burying her face into his shoulder to block out the intensity of the light.
He leapt up to the shrine, keeping her close as he landed. She tilted away from him to look at the damage.
Except that there wasn't any.
Shouldn't there be some sort of sign that—that something happened?
She was glad that it wasn't overly damaged, but she wanted some sort of physical sign of her suffering these past few weeks. Some definable proof that she could point at and say, 'See? That's what I went through,' but there was simply nothing. Just the shrine as it had always been.
"Hey!" Inuyasha shouted as they walked inside the door. Sango was sitting on the step leading down into the shrine floor, while Miroku and Shippo were scrubbing at different spots on the floor. Kaede was at the front of the shrine. All of them looked up from where they were working to stare momentarily at Kagome.
"You're awake!" Shippo shouted, and Sango shifted gingerly so that she could face them. Kirara bounded off her lap and to the side.
"How do you feel?" Sango asked, as Kaede headed towards them.
Kagome looked to each and every one of them. Eyes lingering on their forms, checking them, making sure that they were real and this was real and not a dream.
"Kagome?" Sango repeated, brows furrowing as she tried to ascertain what was wrong.
"What?" Kagome asked.
"Are you feeling okay?"
"She's a little out of it and weak," Inuyasha filled in.
"Ah, that is to be expected considering recent events. I see ye have my bag," Kaede pointed out, motioning to the bag on his shoulder.
"Yeah, I'm taking her to the hot springs to rinse off the last of that goop. Figured it'd be a good idea for Sango to help."
Sango's face brightened considerably as Miroku came to stand beside her, and Kirara slipped past them outside.
"You're sure?" He asked, looping an arm around his neck as he pulled her to her feet.
"Your leg," Kagome whispered, and Sango gave her a small smile as Miroku helped her step up and begin to limp towards a Kirara who'd already transformed into her larger size.
"It's just a small cut. Nothing serious. It'll be fine in a week," she said with a casual wave of her hand.
"Or two," Kaede added.
Kagome turned towards Inuyasha, trying to confirm that what Sango said was honest.
"She's fine. Miroku'd be bawling like a baby if she wasn't."
"Really? Mr. Snarl-at-everyone-who-gets-close?"
"Shut your whore mouth, lecher."
"Tsk, such anger to be claiming so much innocence," Miroku countered as Sango limped next to him.
"Stop antagonizing him," Sango told him as Kirara lowered her belly to the ground for Sango to climb on easier. Miroku hefted Sango up onto her back, making sure that she was settled before stepping back and letting go.
"You've got the soap and everything?" Sango asked, and Inuyasha shifted a little to show off the bag over his shoulder. "Are you going to be able to go that far?"
"Fuck you, Sango," he scoffed.
Sango merely sighed before looking back at her.
"Are you ready, Kagome?"
Kagome turned towards her and nodded.
"Alright. We'll be back shortly," Inuyasha called over his shoulder and leapt off through the trees. This was real. Inuyasha promised her that it was real.
She was awake. She could handle a bath. It would probably feel good to be clean again.
The run to the spring was silent between them, and Inuyasha landed in the midst of the clearing. She'd kept her hands fisted into his haori, holding herself close to him as he ran.
Sango landed a few moments later with Kirara lowering herself down to the ground again. Inuyasha moved to the edge of the pond, kneeling down on one of the flat stones beside the water.
"I'm gonna help Sango over. Just stay here."
He let go, and Kagome couldn't stop herself.
"No! No! Please!" She scrabbled to find some sort of purchase to keep him there next to her. His fingers wrapped around her wrists, holding them away from her. "Don't leave! Please!"
"Kagome!" He snapped, golden eyes staring at her, through her. "Stop." She let out a low sob, completely unbidden, and Inuyasha sighed, letting go of her wrists, and she pulled them towards herself, holding herself close.
"I'm sorry," she cried.
"It's—it's fine. I'm not angry. So stop crying."
Kagome nodded, another sob escaping her, as she tried to restrain herself.
"I'm gonna get Sango. Stay here, got it?"
Kagome nodded again, sniffling, and flinching as she reached out to grab his pant leg and stopped herself a moment later.
This was real.
She was awake.
Her eyes followed Inuyasha as he stepped over to Sango and helped her down. He never left her line of sight.
It was fine. He promised that it was all over. She had no reason to be afraid anymore.
So why wasn't her brain accepting that?
Kagome watched Sango limp over towards the water, leaning heavily on Inuyasha, who lowered her down slowly to the rocks at the edge of the water.
"You good?" He asked, and Sango nodded, and he turned back towards her. "Okay, I'm going to be—"
"No!" Kagome shouted, snagging a fistful of fabric in her hands. "No," she whispered. He needed to stay close, within touching range. "Can't you just—" She frantically tried to find a compromise though none sounded good enough in her mind. "Can't you just sit here?"
"Kagome," Sango started, and Kagome looked at her pleading.
"Just promise that you won't look," she countered, and he gave her a look, one of pity, but she didn't care. She needed him within touching range. "Please," she added after a moment.
He sighed.
"Okay, fine. I'll sit here. Back turned and everything." He looked at Sango. "Just make sure she's clean."
Sango gave him a nod as he turned his back to them both, and Kagome turned slowly to face Sango. Sango slipped off her shoes and pulled her kosode and wrap skirt off, setting them to the side.
"Come on, Kagome," she encouraged, slowly sliding into the water and letting out a short hiss as she did.
"You okay?" Inuyasha asked.
"We're fine. Just stings a bit," Sango answered. "The water feels great, so let's get those dirty clothes off."
Sango limped towards her in the water, before tugging her closer to the edge of the rock.
Kagome helped her untie the belt around her kosode and then strip it off, leaving it on the rock behind her. She guided Kagome into the water, urging her to sit on the rock.
"You okay?"
"Yeah," Kagome spoke softly, glancing over her shoulder at Inuyasha, making sure that he was still there with them.
"It's safe, Kagome. I promise," Sango reiterated Inuyasha's words to her.
But it didn't feel safe. It didn't feel like it was over.
Especially when curls of black started drifting off her skin, floating top of the water like oil.
Sango leaned back, digging into the tote that Kaede had packed and pulled out a small bar of soap, rubbing it between her hands.
"Can you wet your hair for me?" Kagome took a breath and slid off the edge of the rock and beneath the surface of the water before popping back up again. It was difficult to say what exactly made it all feel like the thing—whatever it was—was waiting just around the corner for her. But she did feel the twinge and pull of a large bandage across her shoulder blade.
Her eyes darted for Inuyasha again, and she found him sitting in the same place and in the same position that she'd left him.
Was he—?
An ear flicked back at her, and she took a shuddering breath.
"You okay?" He asked, coughing once.
She nodded before realizing that he wouldn't see her.
"I'm okay. Are you?"
"I'm fine, Kagome. It's just some leftover bullshit, that's all."
His ears stayed flicked backwards though, listening for her. Sango moved behind her running her fingers through her hair and scrubbing at her scalp.
"Kaede said this soap would help remove any traces left by the demon," Sango gently kneaded her fingers through her hair, working her fingers through the long trails of hair.
"Do we know what it was?" Kagome asked her.
"We were waiting to talk when you were awake." Another quick scrub of her fingers and Sango pulled away slightly. "Okay, I'll help you rinse it out now."
Kagome took a breath, ducking under the surface as Sango continued to rinse and scrub at her hair.
Water swirled around her, like a river, and her lungs suddenly felt too tight. There was no air, and no way to breathe, and the pressure of Sango holding her under made her realize that this was what she'd been waiting for. Proof that something was wrong.
She came up sputtering, nearly hacking, as she back away from Sango.
"Kagome?" She asked, looking genuinely concerned.
"Don't!"
"Kagome?" Inuyasha asked this time.
"Don't! Don't touch me!" She shouted at her, backing up to the edge of the hot spring.
"Kagome, calm down," Sango said, edging towards her again.
"No! No! This isn't real! It's not real!"
Kagome twisted slightly to pull herself back onto the rocks behind her, when Sango grabbed her around the middle, trying to pull her back in, but she made it out into the cool air of the fall and slammed into Inuyasha's back.
"What the hell are you doing?" He snapped, turning his head ever so slightly to look over his shoulder.
"I was literally rinsing out her hair!" Sango growled back at him. "Kagome? What's wrong?"
"It's not real," she muttered. "Not real, not real, not real."
Inuyasha started to move, and Kagome locked her arms around his middle to keep him from leaving. He couldn't leave her behind. He couldn't!
Warm hands covered hers as they shook from fear and effort.
"No, please."
"Kagome, calm down. It's just me and Sango."
But his fingers didn't attempt to pry her from his clothes. Instead, they rested gently over hers.
She buried her face into his back and desperately tried to stop crying.
A burst of wind froze her damp skin, making it feel like the temperature had dropped twenty degrees.
"This—This is real. You're awake and safe here. There's nothing else here but us."
She sniffled and nodded against his back.
"Get back in the water before you freeze. I can feel you shivering."
Forcefully pulling herself away from him, Kagome lowered her body back into the water, turning to face Sango-who-might-not-be-Sango.
It was hard listening to them. He could feel the fear radiating off her, and she was trying so damn hard to do what they asked of her.
What had that fucker done to her?
She didn't even think that it was all said and done and over.
If that stupid fuck was alive, he'd gut it over and over again just for what it's done to her.
"Kagome, with your shoulder, it would be easier if I helped you," Sango said, and he heard Kagome move in the water.
"No, no! It's fine. I'll make sure that it's all out! Just—just—you know—relax over there."
There was a slight giggle that fooled absolutely no one, and he sighed.
"Why don't you want me to help? Did I do something?"
"No!" Kagome nearly shouted the word. "I just—It's something that I want to do myself."
She shifted closer to him in the water.
"Kagome, what are you afraid of?" Sango asked.
"That feels like a lot like a trick question."
"I don't understand—" Sango started, but Inuyasha understood exactly what Kagome was thinking.
"That's Sango. She ain't possessed if that's what you're thinking."
"How would you know? You can't smell it!"
"Yeah, but she wouldn't be this nice about shit if she was."
"You don't even know what it—" Her mouth snapped shut with an audible clack of teeth, and he could hear water sloshing. Fuck, she needed to finish so he could fucking see what was happening. "I'll be quick, okay? Just stay over there."
There was a long pause, and he strained to listen for anything that would give her away.
"Kagome?" Sango asked, and his head turned ever so slightly out of reflex.
"It's fine. I just need a moment."
"Kagome, it's not fine. You're shaking," Sango pointed out, and he heard the sharp sob burst out of her.
She didn't speak for a bit as she cried, and Sango moved slowly through the water towards her.
"It's okay."
"No," she sobbed out, "it's not."
Fuck.
His claws gouged out the earth and rock beneath him as he did nothing but sit and wait for her to be properly dressed and clothed before he could do something.
"Alright, let's finish washing out the soap so we can get out."
Water sloshed, and he heard Sango move away from her. It was silent for a good while, and he strained to listen to everything that wasn't being said.
"Kaede packed us some towels, and she borrowed a clean yukata from one of the women in the village for you to change into."
He listened to them climb out of the water and dry off, dressing, but one of them, presumably Kagome, was rushing through the actions, and he only heard her scurrying towards him before she'd promptly dove into his lap, arms wrapping around his neck, and her hair damp against his clothes. Her entire body trembled, even though her skin was warm to the touch.
"You cold?" He asked her, but she didn't answer, curling herself tighter around himself.
He chanced a look at Sango, who was finishing tying her wrap skirt around her waist, but wore a sad look on her face at the sight of Kagome. Inuyasha slowly wrapped his arms around her, tugging her close as she sniffled into his shoulder.
Sango struggled to her feet, hobbling towards them with towels in her hand. Inuyasha watched her, holding his hand out to help her lower herself.
"You're gonna pull a stitch if you keep that up."
"I'll be fine," she retorted as she stretched her leg out to the side. "Besides, you're one to talk." She gently pressed a hand onto Kagome's shoulder. "Kagome?"
But the girl didn't speak or respond to her in anyway, opting instead to remain as physically close to him as she could get.
"I'm going to towel your hair a bit, so it's not so wet, okay?"
Sango waited a beat and glanced at Inuyasha before shrugging and gently starting to pat her hair dry with the towel. Kagome shivered against him, and Inuyasha sighed before shifting slightly to pull off his haori. No point in letting her get sick.
He dragged his haori off, tugging it out of her hands. She whimpered, scrabbling to grip onto his kosode once he pried his haori from her fingers. He draped it over her shoulders as Sango worked to dry her hair in the cooling afternoon air.
He met Sango's eyes as she glanced up from what she was doing, giving him a worried look but not saying a word as she worked.
"Kagome?" Sango asked, continuing to dry her hair, but the girl didn't answer her at all.
He could feel her breathing and hear her attempting not to sniffle. His shirt was damp where she'd pressed her head against it.
"I think that's the best I can do at the moment," Sango answered, letting her hands fall into her lap with the towel.
"Kagome?" He asked, and her arms tightened around his neck. "You ready to head back to the village?"
She nodded slightly against his neck and shoulder, and he let out a short breath.
"Here," he started to pull away from her, but she whimpered. "Put on my fire rat so you don't catch cold. I'm going to help Sango get on Kirara."
She made a noise of protest in the back of her throat, and Inuyasha pulled her arms back. Kagome struggled against him, and he shook her slightly to get her to look at him.
"Kagome, stop!" She pulled away from him, curling into herself. It wasn't like anything that she would do normally, and he kept hold on her arms to stop her from pulling away even more. "Look at me!"
Her teary eyes slowly rose to his, and he held her gaze for a moment before speaking again, to make sure that she was listening.
"Put this on," he pointed to his haori that he'd just draped over her shoulders. "I'm gonna help Sango before she reopens that cut on her leg. And you," he pointed his finger back at her, "are going to sit here, and then I'll take us back to the village. Okay?"
She nodded, hands shaking as she started to pull the haori on over her shoulders and arms.
He remained squatting on the ground next to her for a moment before deciding that getting up and helping Sango was probably the best thing that he could do at the moment. Kirara wandered up next to them, and he easily lifted Sango up off the ground and placed her onto Kirara's back.
"Thanks," she said, eyes shifting back to Kagome. "Take your time. I'll let them know that you're behind me." He nodded, watched Kirara take off into the air, heading back to the village.
He let out a long sigh, walking back to where she sat wearing his haori and looking every bit like the beaten puppy.
"Hey," he said, but at the sound of his voice, she almost seemed to withdraw from him even more. "Kagome," he started again, and she sniffled, still not looking at him.
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
"Don't." He rested a hand on her shoulder, and she looked up at him. Her eyes were red and teary, and she hiccuped a breath.
"Can—can I have a hug?" She asked him, and without any hesitation, he drew her in close, feeling her arms wind around his neck. Like she ever had to ask for it, and like he'd ever deny her.
Her hair was still damp, though not wet, and that soap left behind an unusual smell, though not completely unappealing, but she didn't smell like herself.
She sniffled into his shoulder, and they sat like that for a while, long enough that he knew someone would eventually come looking for them.
"Ready to head back? Kaede should have some answers by now."
She didn't answer him directly, but she did give him a subtle nod.
"You okay if I pick you up?"
Another nod.
This wasn't going the way that he'd expected.
At least she wasn't afraid of him.
Sliding his arm underneath her knees, he picked her up off the ground, shifting her weight slightly before taking off back towards the village.
Kagome felt like she did when her father passed. She felt little, tiny, and afraid of everything.
And tired.
She was so tired.
But sleep, real sleep, felt elusive and taunting, like the thing was waiting for her to fall asleep again and then it would reveal itself in all its ghastly horror.
Inuyasha landed, remaining still for a beat, long enough that Kagome raised her head from his shoulder to see the village, operating as if there had not been some great evil creature that tried to kill all of them yesterday.
He pushed the mat aside with his shoulder, angling them in so he didn't strike her legs on the doorframe. She kept her face buried in his shoulder for the moment, unable to face anyone and everyone else.
It was silent, and she could feel them all looking at her.
"How are ye feeling, Kagome?" Kaede asked, and she flinched at the question.
"Fine," she answered, though her voice was soft and lacking.
Inuyasha moved through the hut, and she could both see and feel the heat of the fire pit as he knelt down, presumably to let her go.
"No!" She shouted, hands fisting in his shirt to keep him there.
"Kagome," he started, and she shook her head, rubbing her forehead against his jaw.
"Please," she begged, and after a long beat, he sighed, shifting so she remained in his lap as he took a seat against the wall. She slowly released his kosode, letting herself relax against him once it seemed likely that he wasn't going to make her get up or release her.
One arm remained around her back, and the other rested across her thighs. Turning slightly, she was able to see Miroku and Sango sitting next to each other. Kaede sat opposite of them across the pit.
"Ye look much better," Kaede commented. "Though I would daresay that some food might help ye gain some of ye's strength back."
She gave a small bowl to Shippo who brought it over to her, holding it up carefully. She took it carefully with one hand, glancing up at Inuyasha before letting go of his kosode to hold the bowl and her chopsticks.
Shippo watched her eagerly, sitting beside her feet, one paw resting on her shin.
"We just gonna sit here, or are you going to talk?" Inuyasha said, and Kagome was glad that the attention wasn't all on her anymore.
"We can speak about what we do know, and perhaps Kagome could fill in some of the blanks," Kaede answered.
Miroku cleared his throat, and Kagome noted the purple bruise that covered the lower portion of his jaw.
"Well, one thing we do know is that it is not an Amanojaku."
"Really?" Sango asked. "That's what you open with?"
"What? It's a fact! It's helpful!"
Sango smacked his shoulder.
"Ow!"
"You're lucky that I can't use Hiraikotsu right now," she warned.
"Am I though?"
"Children," Kaede interrupted as Sango growled at Miroku. She gave them a good non-verbal eye lashing, before clearing her throat and continuing. "We are very clear on what this creature was not. It was not solely a ghost or spirit—"
"Or an Amanojaku," Miroku added, ignoring Kaede's sigh of irritation.
"As I was saying, it was not solely a ghost or spirit of youkai or human origin."
"But it's gone, right?" Kagome asked, her voice quiet, and she found her fingers gripping his pale kosode sleeve in front of her.
"Aye, Miroku nor I feel any presence of it."
"But you never felt it before," Kagome pointed out still clutching the sleeve resting over her legs. "So how can you be so sure now?"
Glancing between the two other reiki users in the room, she watched as they clearly shared a knowing look though she wasn't sure what that look meant.
"I felt it give way when I attacked it," Miroku stated. "And Kaede saw it burn under the ofuda I used."
"Aye, that I did."
"You're sure? Completely?"
"Aye, it's gone, child. There's nothing left for ye to be afraid of."
She stared at the bowl of food resting in her lap, and despite the good news, it still felt wrong. She swore that she could feel it out there, lingering, waiting for her guard to drop and then it would attack her at full force again.
"Kagome?" Her head darted up to look at Inuyasha, who was staring down at her in what she would describe as a scowl, but she knew it for what it was: concern, worry, and everything in between.
She started to say something about how it didn't feel over. But she wasn't quite sure how to describe the feeling. The fear that this was all a dream. That she would wake up alone, everyone dead or possessed, her eyes drifted to Sango, and at the same time, she didn't know if she wanted to leave the dream either.
But that swarmed her with guilt too. What if they needed her and she was just—relaxing—in this world? Just enjoying her time here among friends and they needed her—were dying because she was too content to leave this place.
But this felt so real too. So real, that she didn't know what was and what wasn't anymore.
"I'm tired. I think—I think I want to lay down," she finally met Inuyasha's gaze again, intense and penetrating, and she had to look away, fiddling with her fingers.
"Of course, child. Inuyasha, ye can set her behind the screen. Ye know where the blankets are?"
"Keh," he scoffed. "'course I do. Ain't like you've changed anything in the last century."
He handed her bowl of food off to Shippo, rising easily with her in his arms, and striding to the back of the hut behind Kaede's changing screen. There was a small mass of blankets there, and he set her on top of them, before reaching into the chest behind her and pulling out a couple more.
He looked at her expectantly.
"Well, you gonna sleep or not?" He asked, holding the blankets hostage.
"Inuyasha, be nice," Sango chided from the other side of the room.
"Why don't you get up and make me?" He snapped back. "Fucking slayers," he mumbled under his breath, turning back to her expectantly.
She stretched out, and he draped them over her legs, spreading them out and over her and tucking them in around her form.
"You good?" He asked, and she nodded, expecting him to leave, but he settled down beside her, sitting cross legged, and leaning back against the wall.
She stared at him for a moment, questioning what he was doing. Shouldn't he be going to sit with the others? Why was he here?
"Go to sleep, Kagome," he ordered, and she let her eyes drift away from his face. He was close enough that she barely had to reach out to him at all to touch him, and she was so glad for it. Her hand snaked out, tentatively grabbing onto the extra fabric of his hakama, and nestling her head into the pillow of her own arm.
It took less time than he thought it would for her to pass out and go to sleep. It worried him though. He'd thought that she'd be relieved that it was over and slip back into normal Kagome, but here she was wound just as tight as before. Maybe even more so.
Not to mention that she'd barely taken a couple bites of her food. Also disconcerting.
She hadn't eaten anything really of substance in what felt like a long time, and it worried him. Humans got sick from shit like that, and he really didn't want her ill after everything else she'd already gone through.
He waited for a bit longer than was actually necessary before rising to his feet and settling down at the fire, leaving the sleeping girl behind the screen.
"She's asleep?" Sango whispered, and he gave her a short nod.
"Is she supposed to be this tired?" Inuyasha asked.
"Kagome's reiki stores are larger than anything I've seen," Miroku said with a shrug of his shoulders. "Maybe it takes her longer to recover when she's spent it all."
Inuyasha glanced back at the screen where she slept, frowning. He kept one ear turned towards her, listening for any signs of distress or upset, even though she slept soundly at the moment, probably a good thing.
"Perhaps," Kaede agreed with a nod of her head. "She is quite stronger than any priestess that I have ever seen, even Kikyo did not have the raw power that she does."
Something felt—off. Like it was just out of whack enough that he couldn't place what was wrong with it all. It was just there, mocking him and his gut.
"You're sure the fucker's gone?"
Kaede nodded.
"There was nothing left of it at the shrine and no evidence that anything may have escaped."
"We checked, Inuyasha," Miroku insisted. "Thoroughly. There was nothing left of it."
"Do ye feel that something is amiss?"
He grit his teeth together in frustration.
"Dunno. Just seems almost too easy."
Sango scoffed.
"I'm not sure what you thought was easy about any of that," she said with a wide motion to her thigh.
"Yeah, but after all that bullshit it put her through, and that's it? It's just gone?"
"I think we've been dealing with Naraku for far too long. Not all youkai are able to produce incarnations or steal their heart away," Miroku mused, staring at the fire for a beat. He was still tired, and it showed in the dark circles under his eyes that matched the bruise across his jaw, though not as badly as this morning.
Inuyasha stared at the fire, growing more and more anxious as the silence wore on.
"So what do we do?" Sango asked, looking over her shoulder at the separating screen. Her fingers wove patterns into Kirara's fur as she stroked the small fire cat curled peaceably in her lap. "She's terrified about everything if you're not with her."
He tried to fight down the blush threatening to show on his cheeks, because he didn't mind her needing him like she was. It was actually kinda nice. Just not the part about her being completely terrified over everything and anything. That part he could do without.
He looked back at the screen again, scowling at the girl laying just beyond his scope of vision.
"Should she go back to her time?" Miroku asked with a slight shrug.
"Like that?" Inuyasha motioned broadly to the girl behind them. "She can't even stand on her own. Her mother is going to lose her shit."
And he was sure that he was the one that was going to get blamed. Not that he was completely innocent in that regard, but still!
"Then what do we do?" Sango asked, looking at Kaede, who merely sighed.
"Unfortunately, we do not know what the creature wanted from Kagome before it was killed. So we are left with some unanswered questions."
"No shit," Inuyasha remarked, pausing as Kagome shifted in her sleep, but then settled back down.
"So what do we do?" Miroku interrupted. "She can't go on like she is."
Kaede sighed again.
"Time, unfortunately, will be her greatest help."
Inuyasha groaned as his head tipped backwards.
That was not what he wanted to hear, but it was also not wholly unexpected.
"So what the fuck do we do then? Just wait and fucking hope that she gets better?"
"Patience is key, Inuyasha," Kaede countered. "Kagome needs time and reassurance is all."
"Whatever," his ears flicked back as Kagome let out a small noise. "How long?"
"There is no definite timeline for these sorts of things. Every person moves at their own pace."
Well, that was no help at all. He growled in frustration at their lack of help and knowledge. He needed some sort of timeframe so that he'd know if something was wrong.
"Perhaps taking her home is not such a terrible idea," Kaede offered, holding up her hand to stall Inuyasha's tirade preemptively. "Her time has much more knowledge about these sorts of things. And a break from this place may do her some good. Allow her to heal faster than she would here."
He glared at the fire, not liking the idea of it, but not really having another suggestion or reason to refuse otherwise.
"There is nothing said against ye staying with her either way," Kaede added, and he fought the blush on his cheeks for a second time.
It wasn't like he'd been planning on leaving her alone like she was. She was too fragile for that, and he wanted to make sure that everything was alright and stayed that way.
Kagome let loose a quiet whimper, and his ears flicked back towards her again, waiting, but there was nothing more than that.
"Some rest might help her as well," Miroku added. "Her reiki is severely depleted, so her resting is crucial in her recovery. That can sometimes play some tricks on your mind as well."
"Aye, that can add to the delirium as well. I know my sister had strange dreams that often haunted her for days after taxing herself too heavily."
"Yeah," Miroku winced, "Reiki dreams can be very strange and incredibly disconcerting."
Inuyasha hadn't known that about Kikyo at all, but that did dredge up the weird ass conversation he'd had with her during his search for Kagome when she was missing. She'd been weird and vague—more so than normal.
"Inuyasha?" Miroku asked, bringing him out of his thoughts. "Something wrong?"
"No, but," he glanced in Kagome's direction, "something doesn't feel right. How did this fucker manage to travel through the well?"
"Maybe it didn't?" Sango suggested.
"So what, there's two assholes out for her now?"
"No, one of the many possibilities that Miroku and I spoke about was that it was a youkai or a spirit that existed in both times."
"How the fuck does that even happen?"
"Well, right before everything happened, remember Kagome asking about hitobashira?" Miroku asked.
"Right before everything went to shit, you mean."
"Exactly. Kagome claimed she was seeing the child that was sacrificed for the well-being of the shrine. And the shrine exists now and in her era."
"So wait," Inuyasha rubbed the bridge of his nose, trying to wrap his brain around this concept, "that fucker has been there this entire time?"
"Potentially," Miroku said with a nod. "It would explain how it existed in her era and ours, and how it knew so much about Kagome in particular."
"So, when I take her back to her era, am I going to have to fight off this fucker all over again?" He glanced back over his shoulder with a sigh.
"We destroyed it here, so, in theory, it should be vanquished in Kagome's time as well."
"Good," he said, turning to face the fire again. "I don't know if Kagome could handle another round of this again."
"Agreed. I believe we all need some time to recover from this ordeal," Kaede agreed.
Inuyasha stared at the fire, listening to all the small sounds for just a moment before his mouth blurted the question out before he could stop or filter it.
"Why did it call you 'little sister'?"
Kaede stared at him for a moment, almost blankly before shrugging her shoulders.
"I have not a clue, Inuyasha. Kikyo and I would often bring food during Obon for our own parents and the boy spirit of the shrine. Perhaps in his corruption, he thought of us as family."
"But what corrupted it to begin with?"
Kaede held her hands out in question, looking at Miroku, who shrugged as well.
"Human spirits are strange things. They are easily influenced for both good and evil. How many times have ye seen a spirit angry and commit crimes it would not have when alive?"
"A fucking lot," he answered, chin in hand, as he rested his elbow on his knee.
"Exactly. Somewhere along its path, the spirit of the shrine garnered enough power, and perhaps anger, to manifest into what we saw."
"You think the shards had something to do with that?"
"Eh," Miroku hummed. "Almost anything is a possibility when it comes to the jewel. It's possible that it leeched power from them and that's what helped it manifest, but there's no way to know for sure without questioning it, and I, for one, am glad that it's dead."
But for Inuyasha, the act of not knowing bothered him. Because if it was the shards, how did they stop it from happening again?
"The important thing is that it's all over, and Kagome is safe."
"Aye, and with time, she will recover." Kaede pushed herself up to her feet. "Now, if ye will excuse this old woman, I am still weary from the past few days and will take my leave."
"Night, Kaede," Sango and Miroku chimed.
Shippo had been unusually reserved, and when Inuyasha stood, the kit leapt up to his shoulder.
"Stay with Sango or Miroku tonight," Inuyasha said, nodding towards their friends. "She's restless."
At his statement, Kagome shifted in her blankets, and Shippo let out a small sigh.
"You'll stay with her though?" Shippo whispered.
"Keh, 'course I will."
Shippo leapt off his shoulder, and Inuyasha slipped back behind the screen, already noting the crease in her forehead and the uneasy way her face crinkled in discomfort as she slept. Lowering himself down where he'd been sitting previously, he leaned forward slightly to brush some of the hair from her face, flicking it back behind her. His thumb moved to gently rub the lines in her forehead until she relaxed a little more and they disappeared entirely.
She was safe now. Safer than she had been in a while apparently.
Her hand fisted in her blankets, and he slid his fingers under hers until she latched onto him instead.
"Kagome will be okay, right?" Shippo murmured quietly.
"Kagome will be fine. Inuyasha's with her. He'll keep her safe," Sango said with more confidence than he felt at the moment. He hadn't exactly done an amazing job of it lately.
Leaning back against the wall, he let himself doze for a bit while she slept, fingers still wrapped around his own.
She woke, still slowly, but without all the noise and lights of Kaede's hut that she was expecting. It was quiet and calm, and something about that felt strange and odd and foreboding in the most sincere form of the word.
Pushing herself up slowly, she noted that it was so dark she could barely make out shapes of things around her. Everything was shadows and darker shadows.
"Inuyasha?" She whimpered, hands skirting the area around her as she reached out for him, looking for where he'd been previously.
But only empty space and shadows greeted her.
Something was wrong; she could feel it.
She wasn't alone here, and they both knew it.
"Inuyasha?" She asked, louder this time.
Moonlight slowly filtered across the floor from the window and the familiar appearance of needle-like teeth stretched out before her in a wide, sadistic grin.
Miss me?
A/N: Happy Spring Break! I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter; I really struggled with this one more than the others, but I hope it turned out! Thank you all so much for reading!