She is

by
Sakura-chan Master of the Clow
Track 08: RED

Disclaimer: I do not own any original characters from CardCaptor Sakura. They belong to the beautiful members of CLAMP. I also don't own any of the songs or lyrics referenced in this fanfiction. All belongs to the brilliant writer, composer, singer-songwriter, poet, and artist that is SHINee's Jonghyun and all those who helped create the album. However, the storyline for this fanfiction is all mine–inspired by the album "She is" itself, of course–so please no copyright.

~🎵º✨✨✨✨✨º🎵~

I may have made a mistake. It was meant to be a gift for Sakura ahead of our three-year anniversary, but now I wanna give the damn thing back. Ever since I got her that stupid cat she has been paying more attention to it than me. I know, it's silly to get jealous over a cat but can you blame me? How can you compete with something your significant other finds cute no matter what it does? Using your hand to teeth? Cute. Knocking over a candle off the table? Cute. Scratching our furniture? Cute. Rolling on its back for a belly rub? Cute. Okay, that last one is pretty damn adorable.

Sakura even introduced the cat in a vlog to our audience and now that's all that anyone is gushing about. I knew she would love it and thought it would all blow over by the time we celebrate our three years together… Boy was I wrong.

"Sakura," I finally call out. "Relax. I'm sure the kitten will be fine for one night with Eriol and Tomoyo-san."

"She's still so small though." Sakura pouts as she stares at her phone, no doubt staring at one of the many photos she's taken.

The waiter at the restaurant we are at comes over and asks if we need anything. We're pretty much done, so I ask for the check.

"Mind if I stop by the bathroom to freshen up before we go?" Sakura asks.

I smile, knowing she's most likely to facetime Tomoyo-san and check in on the kitten more than anything. But who am I to stop her? "Go ahead."

As soon as Sakura turns the corner I hear a low whistle to my left. "Wooooow. Sucks to be beaten by a cat, huh?"

It takes all my courage to not glare at Sakura's brother. I plaster on my best smile and turn to face him. "As long as she's happy, that's all I care about."

"Right." The smirk on his face tells me he's enjoyed seeing me get beaten jealous over a cat. I notice the stain on his apron.

"The food was delicious, Kinomoto-san. Please give my compliments to the chef."

Touya Kinomoto raises a brow. "Yuki is handling the bar tonight, I'll take your compliment as trying to butter me up?"

Ah, so he's heard already. I should have expected so. Also ahead of our three-year anniversary, I stopped by Sakura's old home on my own to formally ask her father for her hand in marriage. I plan to propose to her tonight. When I asked where she would like to eat especially today, she said her brother's and Yukito's restaurant. We've been busy and haven't seen her family in a while. We had brunch with her father earlier today and had a date around her hometown of Tomoeda before coming here. I had originally planned to propose to her over dinner, but no way I was going to do that with her brother breathing down my neck.

"I already have your Father's blessing. I'd be more at ease if I had yours too."

"Sakura is my baby sister. Like hell I'd give you my blessing." Of course. "However, I can at the very least tolerate you at family gatherings for her sake."

I'm taken aback. That's as much of a blessing from him as I'm going to get. Honestly, I'm honored. "Thank you," I say. "I will continue to treasure her."

Touya grunted. "Make her cry anything but tears of joy and your dead."

"Onii-chan, would you please not threaten my boyfriend," Sakura said joining us. I can tell she did freshen up her make-up, not that she needs it normally; she looks stunning nonetheless.

"We were just having a man-to-man talk, weren't we, kid?" He glared at me, daring me to expose him.

I want to keep his non-blessing. "Right," I say. "Just a friendly man-to-man talk." I internally facepalm as soon as I say it. Sakura doesn't look convinced.

"How did you enjoy dinner, Sakura-san? Li-san?"

Yukito Tsukishiro, Touya's partner, always comes in to ease the tension when you need it.

Sakura's eyes beam at seeing him. "Dessert was delicious as always. Thank you Yuki-san."

"Always glad to hear it."

As the four of us catch up, I see the way Sakura's eyes sparkle when she looks at Yukito and am reminded that he was her first love. I know she has no such feelings for him now, but I still worry there is always going to be a part of him in her heart. I can't help but wonder if there is even any room for me. Before long we bid our farewells and head to our car. It's only now that I'm getting anxious.

I drive around town towards our old elementary school. I spot the playground nearby lit up with stalls and lights hanging on the trees.

"What do you think is going on there?" Sakura asks.

"Would you like to check it out?" Sakura turns to me and nods happily. I laugh softly. "Alright."

I drive around a bit before finding some decent parking. We walk into the park and Sakura is almost immediately enamored, looking at all the different food stalls and games around.
"Ah!" Sakura claps her hands together and announces, "It's Tsukimi!"

"How do you figure that?"
"The foods being sold like dango are typically for it, plus look up! The full moon is rising."

I look up and sure enough, it is—its silver light fully shining on us. I slip my hand into hers. "Then, shall we walk around a bit and join in the moon viewing?"

Sakura smiles. "I'd like that."

We walk around, play some games, buy souvenirs for our friends and of course food to eat. We gather some food and find a secluded part for the two of us which surprisingly turned out the be the playground area. We settle into the swing set and gaze at the moon as we eat. I'm glad she wanted somewhere more private; even just walking around, Sakura attracts attention. I can only pity them at this point because I know she only has eyes for me. I have the privilege to admire her beauty every day. I'm so caught up in my head that I startle when her green eyes turn and focus on me instead.

"Something wrong, Syaoran-kun?"

"Hmm?" I say in a daze. "Oh…no. It's just you're so fine," I say honestly. Just seeing her ebbs away at my previous anxiety. Sakura blushes and looks away, still not used to receiving compliments.

"The moon is beautiful, but it's making me miss Tsuki-chan more. Should we head home soon?"

Of course, even now she still misses the kitten.

"Sure, but first…" I stand up and kneel in front of her so we're at eye level. She follows my movements, slightly confused. Determined before my resolve slips away, I take her in my arms and kiss her. As soon as our lips touch, Sakura relaxes and melts into the kiss. I wonder if it always feels like the first time we kissed for her too, the way my body sings when our lips meet. I could never tire of kissing her as you could never tire of your old favorite song. Her hand rests on my cheek, even as we draw apart to breathe.

"Wow," she says, running her hand through the hairs behind my neck. "The romantic atmosphere got to you too, huh?"

"Shhh." I grin, enjoying the feel of her fingers playing with my hair, but I must concentrate now. "Let me be in the moment."

"Oh?" she says, amused. "What moment is that?"

I hesitate. Suddenly I can't find the words so lean in to kiss her once more, embracing her even closer until I can feel both our hearts pounding. I know my actions won't help hint at my proposal but I'm fine with that as long as I can have her in my arms.

"Syaoran-kun," she whispers. Her lips are sweet from the Dango we ate; we kiss and kiss. It's only when I feel my hand move on its own to her leg, sliding up her dress that I break apart. Sakura's moan in protest almost has me go back and pick up where we left off. Instead, I lean my head on her shoulder.

"Sorry," I say. "I got carried away."

"You know I won't mind if you do."

I grin but continue. "I was jealous of Tsuki-chan," I confess. "I felt jealous that she was all you could think and talk about when I was right in front of you."

"Oh," Sakura says. She cups my face in her hands and shifts it so we face each other, her jade green eyes full of love and understanding. "I'm sorry I made you feel that way today. From here on out, you have my undivided attention." She seals her promise with a small kiss.

"It's fine," I reassure her. "I love watching your eyes light up when you talk about her."

"Still though," she says stubbornly. "I'm here for you."

I look down at our hands as I lace them together. "Thinking back, I think I was jealous of you too when I first came here. I was so used the being the best at everything, doing things perfectly by the book because that was the expectation for me. But then I met you and were just as good as me at everything I prided myself in and it made me bitter. Through all that, even when I wasn't kind to you, you were to me."

I raise my eyes to her. Every time I look at her it's like when I realized my feelings for her. It still felt like a punch to the solar plexus, like I didn't have quite enough breath in my chest. The only thing reasonable to do back then was run away. But not this time. This time I'm telling you how I feel without holding back. "You mended my heart," I whisper. "You picked up the pieces of a broken, angry boy, and made him into a happy man."

"No," she says, her voice shaking. "You did that on your own. I just—cheered you on."

"I wouldn't be here without you," I say softly. "Not just you—Eriol, Tomoyo-san, and everyone I've met here in Tomoeda—but you are my heart."

"And you are mine. You know that," she says. "Even now that we have a new addition to our little world."

I grin. "Remember when I told you that if I'm with you, I can go anywhere?" She nods. "So, will you?"
"Will I what?"

"Stay by my side," I say. With a shaking hand I pray she doesn't notice, I pull out a small velvet box from my pocket. Upon realizing what it is, Sakura's breath hitches. "Marry me?"

"Marry you?" Sakura echoes. Surprise filled her unguarded eyes as I open up the box, a ring, with rose gold cherry blossoms designed on the side, and pink diamond in the center of the flowers, and a white diamond in the center. She looked from the ring to me and back again. "You mean it? You're really asking?"

I can see her mind behind her eyes. "Yes," I answer. "This isn't a dream, Sakura."

Sakura chokes up a laugh.

"I want to marry you, Kinomoto Sakura. I want to stay by your side and keep growing together," I say. "Do you…want to marry me?"

With a shaken breath she says, "Yes."

I smile and slip the ring into her finger. I'm not sure if she noticed, but the same place I first confessed to her has now become the same place I asked for forever with her.

~🎵º✨✨✨✨✨º🎵~

We might not make it home. Even in the dead of night, Sakura is captivating and oh so distracting. On one hand, she's like a streetlight; a soft light that wraps around me on top of the highway. On the other hand, just having her sitting on my right side is distracting. Top that with her playing with her new ring and looking at me with such wide eyes, half wanting and half mischief every five seconds. I can't concentrate. Can't stop with the brakes. Ever since we invested in a car, this has always been a little dangerous. I should have suspected something was up when she asked me to drive. Sakura loves testing my chastity, seeing if she could break it.

"Sakura, love," I call out. "Please stop."

"Stop what?" she says innocently. I'd believe her if she wasn't sending my nerves on overdrive just by caressing my hand in hers.

"I love you, but I need to concentrate on driving."

Sakura grins. "I promised you would have my undivided attention for the rest of the evening, didn't I?"

Oh, sweet Jesus. I should've known she'd find my jealousy over our cat cute. I dug my own grave there.

Just one kiss, I tell myself. I can handle that.

But I could barely stop myself back at the park. Now it's just us, in an enclosed space, and Sakura seems more than willing.

I nearly jump when I feel her hand on my thigh. A little too close to an increasingly excited fellow down there. "Sakura," I breathe.

"Hmm?"

The approaching light turns yellow and I begin to slow down to stop. I grab her hand in mine, stopping it from traveling further up. I need her. I need to kiss her.

"When the light turns red," I say, "then kiss me. But only then."

Sakura smiles and nods.

I come to a full stop before yellow changes to red. It's then that we become one and Sakura pulls me into a kiss, soft and lingering. "Don't stop," I say as she begins to pull away.

"Wasn't planning to. This is payback for leaving me hanging back in the park."

I grin. "I apologize but you did get a ring out of it."

"True."

She pecks my lips but I deepen the kiss. "There's no need to hesitate. This place is only for you and me."

It's late and there is no car behind us. I'm now glad this red light takes forever to change. There's only darkness, there's only amazing words I can't express to her. I feel her hands travel down my chest. We're at an uncontrollable speed. It's like our first kiss back at the beach all over again.

Like back then, I cup her face in my hands and hold her back. Again, she mews in protest. "Please relax, baby. It's too fast." I open my eyes and see her pouting. I know she feels the same as me. She leans it to close the gap between us. I do nothing to stop it. The honking of a car behind us stops us in our tracks. Flustered I hit the gas pedal and we begin to move.

"Listen, I would love nothing more than to take you here and now, but there is time a place. Despite wanting to respect your Father's wishes, I want our first time to be romantic, too. A car is not romantic."

"We were only kissing."

I sigh at hearing the mischievous grin in her voice. "If you come on to me like this, I won't be able to hold it in."

"What if I don't want you to hold it in?"

How can she say that with such a beaming innocent smile? I thump my head on the steering wheel. "Sakura, please I'm telling you. I can't just look at you, you know this. "

"And you think I don't feel the same?" Sakura retorts. She takes my hand in hers. "I'm happy, Syaoran-kun. Really happy. I want to express how happy you made me today, and not just with words."

I know it's dangerous, but I can't hold it in. Not when she says something so cute and pure like that. I'm falling in the danger zone now. When we kiss it's like the world stops. There's no one but us two.

"Okay, I give in." I squeeze her hand in mine. "But while I'm driving we will hold back. And only kissing during a red light."

"Deal," Sakura says. "But you have to kiss me. Really, really kiss me."

"Okay."

I look at the road ahead. So far we've only been hitting green lights. We are still a good way away from Tokyo. Surely we'd hit a stop soon. There's only one thing chanting in my mind: Red light. Red Light. Give me a red light.

~🎵º✨✨✨✨✨º🎵~

Chapter published August 31, 2022

On this day, our fandom name was released! Happy birthday, Shawols! Only one chapter left. Before that gets published I'm thinking of going back and fixing all the previous chapters and changing the perspective a little to be more in line with the perspective of the songs. I will let you know next chapter if that has happened or not. I think it'd be a cool change and I might even add extra scenes I had in mind but hadn't made it in. Thank you for sticking by me so far.

Sakura-chan Master of the Clow