P.I.S.S.O.F.F.

Ch 10

ISDH

121

Ron was not having a good day.

First that Muggle-bitch would not 'help' him with his homework, and then for no reason, she hauls off and decks him. In the Great Hall no less. Then, to rub salt in the wound, the Headmaster takes points from Him! His own Man!

Next, the drunk Trelawny, used him instead of Potter in her 'Telling's and while not death, they were not pleasant. That was what Potter was for!

Before his next class, word came through a chain of Paintings, that the Headmaster wanted to see him. As he approached the gargoyle, he looked about, before whispering "whisper." the stone beast shifted to the side, to allow the boy to squeeze by, before settling back on its perch.

"Ah, Ron, my Boy." The Grandfatherly fool greeted him warmly, as if he had not stripped away points this morning. "How goes your mission?"

"What Mission?" the Redheaded roughen, groused. "Potter?" He spat, "He has had me running about, working on my Keeping. Then he goes and gets his name in the Goblet, and turns his back on the House, the Team, and the School!"

"Actually, it is a good thing that he stepped away from the School, for now." Albus smiled at Ron, "Covered my Arse, he did, with that prank. He is correct, the Rules state, One Champion per School. As a Hogwarts student, We were in breach of those rules." he popped a lemon sour into his mouth, before offering the bowl to the boy. Ron took one. "As for Quiditch, I was asked by the Minister to hold it off, so we could spotlight the Tournament. Potter turned Malfoy to reinstating the season, and just before the first Game, has to bow out, leaving you sitting pretty. Can you hold it together long enough to show us in a good light?"

Ron grumbled, "What about Potter? What am I to do about him now?"

"Nothing." the wise wizard smiled, "As far as your assignment is concerned, Potter is done. I need you to focus on keeping the outside elements away from him."

Ron frown at the man, "Okay. Why did you take points from me this morning?"

"Because if I didn't, McGonagall would have stripped you to the bone, and then pulled points. I need you to learn to watch your mouth, boy." the gentle grandfather faded, as the Leader of the Light shone through, "You need to learn to pick your battlefields better. If you are going to rile up the bint, Do Not do it in the Great Hall! That is what the Common Rooms are for. And thanks to the Boy's monuvore, He can not protect her in the Common room, nor in Class. Your Brothers have joined him, leaving you the only Weasley son in the Dorms. Get it through your thick skull, Potter is only a means to an End. A stepping stone on the road to Our Goals...My Goals! If you do anything to jeopardize my Plans, you can join your Uncles!"

"My Uncles?"

The Old Man grinned, "Gideon and Fabian." it was not a nice grin, "Sacrifices for the Greater Good."

The boy paled, "Yes Sir."

"With that taken care of," the Grandfather guise slid back into place, "Here is this week's payment, try to make it last the full week, hmm?" a paper wrapped parcel slid across the desk, and was quickly hidden in the boy's robes. "Do you have anything else to report?"

"Not really." Ron frowned as he turned his thoughts back over the last few days. "With Harry gone, most of the House is quiet, Granger is a bit mouthy, but that will fall away as she finds herself without friends. With the Twins gone, there was no party, but like that will stop they the Older Years for long." Ron counted on his fingers. "The Team was a bit depressed, with Potter leaving, but there is word that he is coming to the Tower this evening, for something. When I asked if he thought he could be returning to the Team, the Chasers told me to stuff it." Ron shrugged, "Nothing much really."

The old man nodded, scribbled a note, passing it to the boy. "This should get you out of Potions, but you will have to show for Charms after Lunch. Dismissed." he flicked the note at Ron who snagged it from the air.

121

The Owl, harnessed by Gringotts, was delivering two scrolls. Bones took the time to first read the one addressed to the Director of the DMLE. "I have been invited to a Will reading...Potter,James and Potter-Evens, Lily?" She looked at the young man before her, "Can you tell me why?"

"My answer is that there is a few things that will be shown to Us, that need to be seen." He shifted in his chair, "But I fear that the other scroll is what you are going to want to talk about."

Bones read the second scroll…'Marriage contract... Next week… Talks with…' "Potter?"

"I will tell you now, Susan is not my only Contracted, for House Potter. I have a total of three, two are asking for Continuation. I am willing to talk Continuation with House Bones, or buy a Skip, whichever House Bones prefers." the lad was flustered. "Please, Any and All questions, Direct to Regent Black, aka Headmaster Black, now at Hogwarts." He smiled.

"Regent Black?"

"He transferred House Black to his Heir, me, as soon I took the Ring, something my Managers found amusing. I passed House Potter to a Proxy, that will shake up the 'Mot, and Named Padfoot my Regent, and am thinking of Naming Madam Tonks as my Black Proxy."

"You will want to double the Auror Guard, and make sure they are Goblin Friendly." Lupin sighed, shaking off the Fear of being in this office. "The Lad is set on shaking up all of Britain."

"Noted." she scribbled a note on her blotter, an idea of what the Lad had done. "Now as the Assault on yourselves, by an escaped prisoner…"

"Throw the Book at the Bitch." Potter sneered, "House Potter wants Justice, but House Black wants her and her supporters to bleed Red and Gold."

"Done. How far do you want this to go?"

"Exclude House Potter allies, in the First wave. If there are two reasons to crush Potter Allies, take them. If only one, leave them with a warning." the Lad had gone cold, "Potter does not run from a fight, but Black is to be Feared. For now, House Potter and House Black are using the Law. Next, We will use House Privilege."

"And just who is Allied with Potter."

"The Cub does not know of his Father's nor his Grandfather's Alliances." Lupin piped up, "The Old Man has Failed in his duties to House Potter, and none of the Others have approached to reaffirm."

"Not for lack of trying." Bones snarled, "Susan tried many times in her First year, but was blocked by Weasley, Claiming that Potter had no interest in the Old Alliances. Second Year, was the same until the Dueling incident… where the Lad's … gift scared off the whole of Hufflepuff."

"Ron was not acting under my orders, nor Wishes. Please pass the word to Susan, she and a Friend are welcome at my side, anytime." Harry bowed his head, "While no longer a Hogwart's student, I am open to visiting any of the Four Houses, bar a few Select persons, who will be informed personally. House Potter asks House Bones to also tell the Other's of the old Alliances, We are open for talks. Ignore the words of the Youngest Son of Weasley, as I fear that he answers to someone who does not have my Interests in Heart if not Mind."

"A Friend?" the Matron asked. "What Friend?" her smirk barely hidden.

"Hannah Abbot, I believe." Harry looked the Witch in the Eye, "The two are rarely separated, and Hufflepuff rarely travel alone." He looked at his Uncle, "Especially after our Second year."

"There were a few discrepancies in Umbridge's paperwork. Otherwise I would have handled it last night." The witch opened a folder on her Desk, "She and Fudge have been pushing hard for the 'Kiss' for Black, but with the paperwork I have found, just in the Archives, something was not adding up. When I set a few Rookies to combing the Files of her Office, a ledger came to light. It seems that she is Blackmailing or taking bribes from most of the 'Mot, and no few of the above drone class Ministry workers. Fudge is showing signs that his fingers are in the Pies as well, but with everything going through Umbridge, that she might just be putting pages before him to sign, and dribbling a few gold coins before him."

Just then, a knock on the door, redirected the attention of everybody…

"Come!"

The wild haired head of the Wand Maker poked his head in, "Bones. You call for me in an Official Capacity?"

"Ah, Garick. Yes, I need you to Identify and 'read' this Wand, For the Record. It was used against Umbridge this afternoon, according to testimony."

The Wand Maker, stepped in, closing the door behind him. Taking the Wand between his forefingers, he whistled. "Holly with a Phoenix Tail feather, 11 inches, Supple." He glared at the young lord, "And you have Burned out the Core! The Wood is crystallised from the inside, and …" His eyes went wide… "By the Holy Tree, Just have you done?"

"Just Defended myself from an attacker…" Harry frowned, "At Least that was today. Ever since the end of Second Year, she has been a bit off. But she changed yet again at the end of Third Year. And now…" He waved his hand at the stick held between the old man's pointers.

"Director Bones, The last spell cast by the wand was an 'Expelliarmus' not even an hour ago, but I can see it fading as we speak. The Lad's Magic has burned the Feather, and infused the ash to the wood. It will still function for him and him alone, but if what I am hearing is correct, he is Going to need a new wand." He handed the wand back to the Witch, "To anyone else, that is just a pretty stick. I can not even use it to recore a new wand for the Lad. I will need him to come by for a refitting."

"Thank you Garick. That is all."

The Wand Maker bobbed his head, and left.

"Anything else you need from me?" the boy wiped his face with his hands, "It has been a long day, and I skipped breakfast, and missed Lunch. I would like to go grab something before returning to the Castle."

"Just to sign some forms." a few sheets from her filing cabinet, she quickly quilled the Paperwork, "The primary charges for today are, but not limited to…"

"Assault and Attempted Murder of Lord Potter-Black, the Chosen Champion and the Deputy Headmaster of the Potter Insitute, and risking the Lives and Safty of the Puplic Of Diagon Alley." Harry frowned, "I will leave the exact wording up to you, and please feel free to include any and all charges you can. The Pettier, the Better. I do not know why, but that hag rubs me the wrong way." he rubbed the back of his left hand. He signed the bottom of the Page offered to him. "I do hope that we can meet for something more unofficial, next time."

The Lad and the Wolf made their excuses, and exited to the Office.

121

Twenty minutes later, Harry and Remus sat in the outside dining area of Florean Fortescue's awaiting for their order. The busy buzz of the public hurrying about, brought a smile to the lad's face. Their robes were an Island of White in a swirling sea of Dark Blues, Greys, and Greens. No two were completely the same, be it shade, tone, cut, or material.

Any wool-gathering was disrupted as two platters with their lunch orders were dropped before them, as the Propietter nodded at the lad who had spent most of the Summer at his place, over a year ago. "Mr. Potter. Good to see you, but are you not in School?"

"Florean, May I introduce my Uncle Remus Lupin, Deputy Headmaster and Master of Defence for the Potter Institute of Spells, Sorcerory, Occultism, Familiars, and Foci." He grinned at the Mustachioed Man, "Uncle Moony, Florean Fortescue, Deli Master and Provider of Popular Potibles and Partakeables."

"Show off." the shopkeeper smiled at the young man.

"You do know that he is no longer Mister Potter." Lupin smiled at the young Lord, "He is now Lord Potter-Black." Looking up at the man, "You can now Boast that this the Prefered dining establishment of Lord Potter-Black."

"In that case, Afters are on the House. Your Usual?" at the young Lords nod, he turned to the , with a raised eyebrow.

"Three scoops of Triple Mint Chocolate Death, and we will be needing them to go." The Wizard Wolf sighed, "You no doubt heard about the incident out front of Quality Quiditch?" At the big man's nod, "It seems two wands were rendered non-operational with his Lordship's Disarming charm. His Power was too great for it, and now Ollivander wants him in for a refitting."

Florean grunted, before smiling at the two before him. "Afterwards, head down Knockturn to Aberrant Batons, Tell the Wand Crafter that I sent you. Garrick is good, but Toni is better. And remember to get a different wand holster for each."

Harry tore into the Prime-rib steak sandwich before him, as Lupin snacked on his chips. As the plates were quickly cleaned, two cardboard boxes, charmed to keep them waterproof, and chilled. After Wiping lips and fingers, the two dropped three Gold, and crossed the street, to Ollivanders.

As the Door closed, "I did not expect you to show so quickly" The wild haired Crafter stepped from the shadows. "Main Question, Are you going to keep that wand?"

"No, Not really." Harry drew his Holly wand, setting it on the counter, "You claimed it was fragile. It has served me very well, if a bit dodgy after I was bitten by the Basilisk and heal by Fawks."

The Wand MAker's eyebrows went up "Basilisk Venom? Phoenix Tears?" His eyes drifted to the Wand, "And you said dodgy?

"Yeah, like a wagon with an untrue wheel on the rear, and then Last Year, when I drove off the Dementor Pack with my Patronus, it went Wonky, like a wagon missing a front wheel. If I kept the load balanced, and the speed slow, she would carry me home, but…"

Garric gently picked up the wand, "Patronus you say, Fully corporeal?" at the boy's nod, "Out of Curiosity…"

"A Stag," Looking at the Man at his shoulder, "Prongs."

The Wolf sniffed.

"Any Idea how many were driven Off?"

"It was the Whole contingent that was stationed about Hogwarts last year. My Friend Granger estimated it to be about a hundred."

The old wizard hummed, "and this year?" He looked at the boy over the wand between his finger tips, "What has changed in the last few days, it completely altered the inner structure of this Wand."

"Between me being chosen for the Tournament, Which led to me being declared of Age, which in turn allowed me to claim not just my Heir Rings, but due to the Arse that is my Godfather and Headmaster of the Institute, both Lord and Head Rings as well. Heir Potter Ring loosened up something, and the Lord Potter put me to my knees, breaking most of them. As for Black..."

[Flashback]

"… is good enough to know that my Dogfather is so going to be threatened with a Neutering."

Moony snorted, as he tried to contain his laughter.

Ashrack quickly got down to business. First it was the ritual for the Heir Ring, which caused Harry to grasp his scar, hissing.

As the Heir Ring was slid onto his finger, the Lordling felt a prickling run up his arm and a sharp, stygian stab in his Scar.

$What is this stain on the House of Black? What is this stigma on our Heir?$ the voice was in Harry's head, and yet not. $This one is Impure!$

$It is a scar from when I first faced the last Heir of Slytherin. Or so he called himself.$

The cold pin-pricks about his scar shifted, as if whatever he was talking to had changed its point of view.

$The Last Heir, First Facing of?$

$I have so far faced him, or his shade/ghost, and walkway alive, if not victorious, three times now.$

$I am sensing more then just this dark magic in our Heir.$

$The second time I faced him, I killed his host, as it could not stand the touch of my hand. The third time I killed a Beast he had bound to his will, as it bit me. I survived as I Destroyed what had Kept his shade alive, with the very venom that was flowing through my veins. I only survived by the wits and Luck of befriending a Phoenix, who cried into my Wounds.$

$All this, as the Heir of House Black?$

$No, Did not know of my Station as a Scion of Black until two months ago, and even then was unaware of my Statius as Heir of Potter. My Godfather was too Slytherin for his own good, and was sent to a Hell of our Enemies making. He escaped to protect me, and when I was deemed to be 'Of Age' by the same fools, He, the unclaimed Lord of Black, named me Heir and sent me to claim my Rings. I had no Idea that the Sneaky Bastard had doubts of his ability to produce an Heir of his Body, and so Passed the Future onto me.$

The prickling grew more intense, as if a millipede had strapped pins to its feet and was dancing about the scar.

$There are two soul shards in this wound, one is stronger than the other, but she is weakened by bindings on you, though they are freshly broken. The Darker one is too weak to take you over, but it is oozing into your… Heir, where are your defenses? Your mind and core are laid bare!$

$Defenses?$ Harry was confused, only to grab his head, as the Ring surged, and then to scream as the scar split open, and a black puss and smoke were ejected.

[flashback ends]

"... I had to defend myself when we were attacked outside Quality Quiditch, where my disarming charm not only knocked my attacked across the alley, but knocked her out, and broke her wand.

"Broke. Wand." the look of horror on the Crafter's face, a sacrilege of the highest order… a wand breaking another. "Who?"

"Umbridge." snarled Moony. The hate twisting his face, as if the Wolf wanted to rip from within.

"Oh." the old man turned his attention back to the wand in his fingers. "So, you have charged your core, changed your blood, and snapped bindings on your Magic… You should have brought me your wand in during your stay in the alley…" he than hummed, "I will have to craft you a new wand… the changes in your blood require a durable, firm yet flexible wood, with a high capacity core... " He turned to the backroom, "Follow me."

The two wizards in white followed in his wake.

In a room filled with blank blocks of wood of all types and lengths, Garrick waved a hand at the walls. "Close your eyes, and wave your hand as you cast… Lumios."

"Lumios."

A block of wood launched from the Back wall, aiming for the lad's head, and just before it hit, he snagged it from the air. The Wand Carfter nodded, before turning to another room.

"I normally use only use Dragon Heartstring and Unicorn mane and tail strands, with the odd Phoenix feather now and again, but they are not the only material available."

"Where do you get your…"

"The Heartstrings come from Dragon reserves, and Hagrid usually brings me strains of Mane and Tail strands, to fund his Bar bills and Poker habits." Garric waved about the room, filled with shelves of terracotta jars. "I travel for about a month each year, collecting samples here and there, and some travelers bring me things they find… the Lovegoods use it to fund their expeditions now and again." He smiled at the lad. "Here the process is different. Close your eyes, and reach out with your magic, your are looking for a 'sound' that blends with you and your magic."

Harry did as he was told. Six 'tones' returned. Two were sharp, and painful to his ears. He pulled his magic from them. The other four warbled, before one fell silent. "I have three, sing to me." Harry then pointed them out.

Garric looked bewildered, and yet excited, "My Boy, this is going to be one doozy of a Wand." he Collected the three clay jars that Harry had pointed to. "Now I just need to match your wavelength…" he led the way into the workroom. Setting the jars on the bench, he pulled a selection of wands from a cubby, and turned to the boy. "Lets see, your last was eleven inches, so… let's try a ten…" the old man traded the block in harry's hand for a dowel of pine. "No, too flat… let's try thirteen…" the stick was traded to a longer on, "No, too sharp. A twelve?" the third rod bucked in harry's hand, but the old man sighed, "Twelve and a quarter. Okay, Do you want to return for it today? Or do you want me to mail it?"

"How long will it take?" Lupin asked.

"I am looking at two, maybe three hours, pending on the reactions of the cores." He returned the rods to their cubby, "So that just leaves payment."

"Mail it." Lupin sighed, "I am needed back at Hogwarts. Our Headmaster has a penchant for trouble."

"Okay." the wand maker led the way back to the front counter. "Custom Wands, are different than stock wands. Your first wand is co-paid by a Ministry Subsidy, as this is your second wand, that does not apply here." he pulled up a muggle order form and biro, "Ten Galleons for the wand, Forty galleons per core, brings us to a one hundred thirty galleons. I will throw in a new deluxe wand care kit and a hit wizard wrist holster. Now, will that be coin or ring impression?"