AN: Sooo much love going out to my amazing Alpha and Beta, SyrenGrey and Kiridraca. I've been obnoxious with this chapter and next and your support has really pulled me through.

Love you guys!

XOX

Olivia had a hard time adjusting to their return to the castle. Their weekend away solidified in her mind that she wanted Severus more than anything in the world. She had fallen quickly for the man and wanted nothing more than to utter those three little words to him.

But she wouldn't.

She knew him well enough at this point that should she confess something heartfelt and raw, he would hex her and run as far away as , she dealt with the butterflies in her stomach when their eyes would meet, the surge of lust she felt anytime they were alone together but couldn't act on it.

Their brewing sessions continued, although to be perfectly honest, she hardly worked. She spent most of her time watching him and his dexterous fingers work their magic. Severus aside, she loved the unofficial apprenticeship Poppy offered her. She was learning so much and frankly didn't want to give it up. One afternoon, Olivia stood at the cabinet, stocking potions and bandages when a student came in, crying. Her hands were horribly blistered. Olivia immediately recognized her from before, months ago when she had been hexed to have her teeth grow, Hermione Granger. Olivia took her back to a private room, calling for Poppy to come heal the poor girl. She wasn't supposed to treat any Hogwarts students anymore, not since Maxime had put an end to it.

"Just what do you think you are doing, Olivia?" Maxime had escorted a Beauxbaton student to the hospital wing for a quick pepper-up potion to find Olivia standing beside Poppy, assisting with a Hogwarts student. "You work for us, not with these…people." Her voice was low and full of disdain, as if associating with anyone else was repulsive.

"I'm only assisting, Madam Maxime. Madam Pomfrey has been kind enough to teach me more effective methods of treatments, Knowledge I can bring back with me."

"There will be nowhere to bring this information back to, girl. You have been completely absent from our school. You chose to board yourself here, to work here. Do you not remember your place, girl? We're here to win a championship, not fraternize with the competition."

"But I'm not -"

"Do not think your liaison with that dark man has gone unnoticed Olivia. Word travels quickly around here. You have made your allegiance known. I want you out."

"Madam, please! You are overreacting. I'm just learning -"

"I do not wish to hear of it. You will finish out your little…lessons. But they will not be practical lessons. I do not want you practicing healing on anyone not from our school. At the end of this competition, you will clear out your things and find employment elsewhere." Maxime paused to look over at Olivia with such disgust, such…disappointment. "You were sorted into Bellefeuille. You are supposed to be loyal above all else." Maxime turned and left, leaving Olivia sobbing and completely distraught.

Where would she go? What would she do? She felt hopeless.

Poppy calmed her down, assuring her that everything would work out. Within two weeks, she had officially been offered an apprenticeship at Hogwarts which she gratefully accepted. This school had already taken her in, and treated her like one of their own. That night, she was able to find comfort and celebrate with Severus… twice in fact. She had no idea how or why this position was offered, but she wouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. She was going to get to stay in Scotland… with Severus.

Their relationship was doing remarkably well. Over the next few months, they saw each other every day and nearly every night. Occasionally Severus would say he was too busy, having night patrols or other head of house duties, and sometimes he was a complete bastard after a run-in with the Defense professor, Moody, and she'd seek asylum in the hospital wing. Those were the loneliest nights for her; she hated sleeping alone and often times would seek out Poppy for a cup of tea and a good chat in the hopes that she'd be able to doze off. It never worked though. Evidently she was unable to sleep without a pair of strong arms wrapped around her, she even missed the little snores he claimed weren't from him.

She found Severus to be more physical than he used to be, constantly holding her hand under the table or a possessive hand on her thigh or a quick kiss in the hall if he could get away with it. Once, he slid one of his torturous fingers under her skirt, rubbing her clit as they sat at the High Table. wincing when she snapped her thighs closed on him. Her bottom was sore for a complete week after that, but it was worth it to hear him growl about being denied what was his.

Lucius had sent over a few more invitations but Severus never let her read any. Sometimes he would smirk at the letters, other times he'd toss them straight into the fire, relaxing only when she'd use her mouth on him, not that she'd ever complain. Hell, any excuse to suck him off was fine by her. She did sneak a peek once, reading a sexy threat from Lucius as well as teasing him about his desire for the witch. She only read a few lines before it was snatched away and thrown into the fire.

I've never seen you act this way before, Severus.

So possessive…so animalistic.

I do hope you change your mind and return soon.

Cissa is very disappointed she wasn't able to sample your offerings.

Come for her birthday at least?

Perhaps there will be an engagement by then to celebrate as well?

Lucius

PS: You're going to get one hell of a caning when I get my hands on you again, Poppet. Don't think your behavior went unnoticed.

Of course, she had wanted to ask all about the allusion to an engagement, she knew they had a son, Draco. The platinum-haired young man was difficult to miss, strutting about the school like a young cockerel. Perhaps he was in a serious relationship? She'd have to remember to ask how old he was. She was also positively salivating at the idea of watching a caning, but was too intelligent to bring that thought into his head when he was in a foul mood.

Winter changed to spring rather quickly. The Beauxbatons were all pleased to have the weather change into something a bit warmer. It seemed the entire academy was rallying behind their champion, eagerly awaiting the instructions for the third and final event. The final week in May was finally upon them. Fleur had been informed that she was to go to the Quidditch pitch that evening at nine o'clock sharp where Mr. Bagman would give her instructions for the final event. Fleur was under the impression that they would have to use underground tunnels to look for some sort of treasure. Olivia doubted that very much, but she would wait to hear the clue, attempting to show school pride, before she'd sneak off to meet with Severus. She needed his comfort tonight for some reason, she just felt a bit uneasy.

The Beauxbaton champion returned at half past nine, visibly confused. They had been told it would be a maze of sorts. She was disappointed that it sounded so straight forward. They had been told there would be obstacles and creatures. Still, she was determined to try her hardest. The two Hogwarts boys were ahead in points, and of course she had Krum to deal with as well. Together, the school plotted, coming up with the best strategy possible.

XOX

When Severus had returned from Malfoy Manor, he found himself distracted more than usual. He wasn't a stupid man, he understood what this crippling feeling deep in his belly meant. It's just that he never meant to feel that way again. There was too much to unpack there.

Was he betraying his love for Lily? He supposed not. It was more of an infatuation with someone who showed him the slightest bit of mercy in his fucked up youth. Feelings were never returned and nothing had ever happened physically. Besides, he was keeping his debt to her by keeping her child alive. How often had he saved the arrogant little lad from life threatening adventures?

What about putting her at risk? He couldn't protect Lily, couldn't save her. Should the Dark Lord return, would he be willing to take that chance again? Dumbledore kept assuring him there was nothing to fear but Severus knew in his gut something was wrong. As the months progressed, not only had his mark darkened, but a few times he swore it was moving, coming to life as it had back at the start of term. Severus knew in his heart of Voldemort were to return he'd have to give her up. But maybe that wasn't the right answer? Surely, he could protect her better, if needed, if he were to remain her partner? He wasn't sure he would be able to let her go; she was his. Severus didn't want to go back to being a lonely, bitter man.

It didn't help that Lucius kept sending him post, teasing him about Olivia and trying to lure the both of them back to their marital bed. Most of the letters he burned. Some were mildly entertaining, others completely lascivious. All of them discussed how passionate he was with Olivia.

Lucius had even thrown the "L" word around a time or two. He wasn't ready to admit that to himself, let alone his witch. It was a close call; she had read over his shoulder but thankfully he tossed it in the fire before she read too much.

Severus,

Your silence has intrigued me, my friend. Did we go too far for you? Or not far enough? I know you've missed my cock, Severus. I bet you're twitching now just reading this. Why don't you let the princess read with you?

Is she there? Perhaps under your desk, squeezing your thighs as she runs her tongue over your cock? It feels good, doesn't it? I remember the feel of your witch vividly. How is her hot little mouth? Is it as good as her cunt?

Perhaps you'll start stretching her tight little arse so we can share her properly. I'll be generous enough to let you keep that hole, I'm more of a cunt man, anyway.

Cissa could ride your cock as Olivia slides over mine. Would you like that? Would you try to hurt me again? We both know that was naughty of you. I thought you were better trained. Perhaps it's time for another lesson, hmm?

It's so obvious, isn't it? The reason why you're so hard reading this and yet so very angry. Is your cock as red as your face? I would bet every last galleon to my name that it is. Is your cock weeping for me? Do you want to fuck me and choke me? Did it feel good to finally dominate me for once?

Don't think I'll allow it again, Poppet. I'm not that generous. But it was so obvious, wasn't it? You love her. It's hard to miss. You've never been that tender with anyone before. I saw you in the garden, making love to your witch. I'm just glad you're happy, Severus, truly. What else, besides love, could make you so jealous of me? So eager to show your dominance.

You're quite sexy when you want to be, I'll have you know.

I've never seen you act this way before Severus.

So possessive…so animalistic.

I do hope you change your mind and return soon.

Cissa is very disappointed she wasn't able to sample your offerings.

Come for her birthday at least?

Perhaps there will be an engagement by then to celebrate as well?

Lucius

PS: You're going to get one hell of a caning when I get my hands on you again, Poppet. Don't think your behavior went unnoticed .

That was the final straw. He needed to get things sorted. If he was so obvious that Lucius fucking Malfoy was aware of his heart, a conversation needed to happen soon, they must be more careful.

Severus was able to distract himself throughout winter. Olivia warmed his bed most evenings and he found on the rare occasion she wasn't with him, he couldn't sleep. Hugging her pillow was embarrassing and left him feeling empty.

He knew he was being too careless with his affections. Minerva had made several comments about catching them holding hands or a quick peck on the cheek between his classes. He just shot her a glare and went on about his life, well aware of the cackling witch who looked too pleased with herself.

One night, he nearly hexed that damned French giant for making his paramor cry. How dare she punish his witch for furthering her education and training. Perhaps he'd mention the possibility of an apprenticeship to Poppy. Surely the woman would take her on? That thought only led him to the heartbreaking realization that in a few short months she'd leave and go back to France. They hadn't discussed the looming inevitability of her departure, and the idea that he'd lose his witch made his heart clench.

The next day, he marched himself down the hospital wing, seeking out the Mediwitch. She had teased him relentlessly, of course, bringing Minerva in on the conversation as well. They found it deeply romantic that he wanted to set this up for Olivia and couldn't help taking the piss out of him. The two witches marched off to Headmaster later that evening and propositioned for a new position for the young witch. Severus hadn't been made aware of the details, but thankfully the Headmaster eventually agreed to it.

XOX

The last week of May, the champions were to meet at the quidditch pitch. Minerva had given Severus a heads up prior to the students' nine o'clock meeting, in case he wanted to eavesdrop with her. He declined, naturally, opting to go to bed early. Olivia had mentioned seeking him out after she learned of the task, and he was hoping to get a quick nap in before he ravaged her all night.

At 8:00, he had awoken, stumbling to the shower to not only wake up, but groom himself before his witch came over. She was constantly commenting on how much she loved how he smelled, not to mention, he'd try to put more effort into his hair, even if it was only for her benefit.

As he reached for the handle to shut off the water, he felt a shock in his arm. He hissed, instantly pawing at his Mark. It wasn't a summons. Those were much stronger. This felt more like a zap. A quick little burst of magic that electrified his skin and then quickly returned dormant.

That was the final straw. Severus quickly dried his body and quickly buttoned his sleeves and frock, protecting himself in a suit of armor for the battle he was willingly engaging in. He quickly strode to the headmaster's office. Severus would refuse to leave without any answers.

XOX

Severus found himself pacing in the Headmaster's office. He had been granted entry but the old man was nowhere to be seen. Snape swore the man did this on purpose, any time he knew Severus had something important to share he'd always show up late and make some sort of entrance.

Where is he?

Severus was getting dizzy, promenading the circular room, being driven crazy by all the tinkling noises from his Merlin-forsaken trinkets and whispering portraits. He stomped over to the large, clawfoot desk, placing his fingertips on the surface and leaning forward, head down, pensive. The Headmasters were all busy gossiping about his behavior when Dumbledore decided to arrive.

"Severus, what a pleasant surprise, my boy. Please, have a seat."

You just granted my entrance to your office, Albus… pleasant surprise indeed.

Severus huffed, inelegantly slouching in the padded chair across from the desk. He knew Dumbledore enjoyed making his guests sit across from him, giving off the illusion of a student in trouble, always one to hold his power over you, even if disguised as a twinkling grandfather figure. Intimidation tactics didn't work on Severus Snape.

"Headmaster. I believe the time has come where we need to consider the Dark Lord's imminent return."

"Oh? Have you gathered some sort of new evidence? From Karakaroff? Or Lucius, perhaps? If memory serves, I believe you two were quite close." Dumbledore peered over his half moon spectacles, with a challenge in his eye, taunting Severus to deny it.

Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, he responded with "Have you been receiving the Daily Prophet? There are more articles about the disappearance of Bertha Jorkins, not to mention, a mysterious illness for Barty Crouch. Why has this not been discussed? Two Ministry workers have gone missing under mysterious circumstances. Not to mention the reinstitution of the Triwizard Tournament after 200 years…and Potter's name. These all seem to have too much in common, Headmaster. These events should have been investigated months ago."

"Perhaps they have been, Severus," Dumbledore responded tersely. Severus chose his words carefully, seeing as his initial response would not have been appropriate in polite society.

"Who have they been discussed with, might I ask? I have not been made aware of any information since the night Potter's name was pulled. If I might be so bold, Headmaster, but I hardly think that asking a washed up wizard who, frankly, has lost the plot, to 'keep an eye' on Potter was hardly enough protection."

"Was it not you, Severus, who informed me to let the events unfold? Do you take your own advice with such little authority?"

Severus sneered. Of course, at the time, that was the reasonable response. To lay low and see what tactics the enemy would use. He was a soldier, spying was in his nature. Dumbledore was supposed to be a General. Someone to lead his men into battle and develop their strategy.

"Of course not, Headmaster."

"Perhaps you have been too distracted of late, my boy. There is…great beauty to be seen in the castle these days. But perhaps a more…pensive outlook on life would be more beneficial?" There was a long silence between the men, each well aware of what the other was intending with their words.

Severus stood, walking toward the large window, lacing his fingers behind his back as he looked out over the grounds.

"You have confidence in your abilities, Severus. I have watched you grow from a young boy into the man you are today. I know you are tough enough to follow through. That you are wise and brave enough to make the…hard decisions that will be necessary, when the time comes."

Severus turned to look at the old man. He had walked over to his Pensieve, looking down at the swirling memories that he hadn't returned to their vials yet.

"The past often effects our present and future, Severus, as I am sure you are well aware. Sometimes I like to look back at the past, reflect on it, and adjust my behaviors accordingly." Dumbledore stood and started walking back towards his desk, a sorrowful look on his aged face. "Young Harry will need you, when the time comes, Severus. Harry will need your complete attention and loyalty. No one can come before him, you understand that, I'm sure."

No. I'm finally happy. Finally living…feeling.

Severus gripped the window sill, nails digging into the stone and every muscle in his back tensed. He loosened his grip, only slightly, when he felt the trickle of blood leaking from his fingertips, already callused from years as a Potions Master. Dumbledore hadn't turned to look at Severus. He missed the flash of anger, of pain, that crossed his features.

"He has his mother's eyes. You do remember them, don't you, my boy? They were hard to forget."

No… Please. His chest squeezed painfully, the guilt ripping through his body. How could he have forgotten Lily? He felt numb, dead inside. All of the warmth and joy that Olivia had brought, snuffed out with a single sentence: he has his mother's eyes.

Fuck. He should have known better than to let down his guard. He had a duty, a life debt owed that could not be forgotten or exchanged for happiness. But surely, even a fucked up person such as Severus Snape deserved to be happy for once? He was lost, drowning in a sea of despair, and the only thing he could think of was to find something…someone… to keep him afloat.

"Indeed," he whispered, barely audible. He grit his teeth, blinking back the burning feeling of tears that he'd refuse to let fall. He'd return to his dungeon, full of darkness, seeking the only light in his life. She would be arriving soon and he'd find solace with her for as long as he could.

"Is there something you wish to tell me, Severus?" The Headmaster's eyes were glittering again as he turned to look at Severus, lowering his eyes to Snape's left arm, challenging the man, as if to imply he already knew.

Snape crossed his arms behind his back, right hand gently caressing left, comforting himself. He raised his occlumency shields, something he hadn't had to do for a while but suddenly his trust in the old man was wavering. He contemplated telling him about his Mark, how it only moments ago felt electrified. After all, wasn't that why he was there in the first place?

"No, Headmaster."

Albus narrowed his eyes, looking both curious and incredulous. Severus stood straighter, spine ramrod straight as he allowed the Headmaster to stare directly into his black eyes. He felt the slight tingle of betrayal as the Headmaster gently caressed his mind, failing to sneak inside unnoticed. Severus grit his teeth and raised his shields even higher, not wasting the energy to attempt to conceal his occlumency. Albus face morphed into anger…rage, for only a millisecond but Severus caught it. Within a blink, he was once again a frail old man, looking at a young man with that damn twinkle.

"Very well, Severus. You may go."

Severus swept out of the office, balling his hand into a fist before he punched the stone wall. He cradled his mangled hand, enjoying the pain and centering himself from it, as he stomped down the stairs and past the stone gargoyle. The wall was sliding shut behind him when he saw…him.

"Potter!" He sneered, luring the boy closer. "What are you doing here, Potter?"

"I need to see Professor Dumbledore!" he yelled over his shoulder as he ran up the corridor, skidding to a standstill in front of Snape. "It's Mr. Crouch…he's just turned up…he's in the forest…he's asking–"

Crouch.

"What is this rubbish?" his black eyes were glittering, hopeful that if Crouch was here and alive, that he was just overreacting, driven into paranoia from the deadly combination of Moody and Karkaroff. "What are you talking about?"

"Mr. Crouch!" he shouted. "From the Ministry! He's ill or something – he's in the forest, he wants to see Dumbledore! Just give me the password up to–"

"The Headmaster is busy, Potter," his lips thinned as he pressed them against his teeth, seething. So Crouch really was ill. What could this possibly mean?

"I've got to tell Dumbledore!"

Severus was furious. If Potter could just stop screeching for a moment, perhaps he could come up with a coherent explanation. "Didn't you hear me, Potter?"

"Look," the boy snapped. "Crouch isn't right – he's –he's out of his mind – he says he wants to warn –"

The stone wall to his back slid open, the Headmaster standing there with a mildly curious expression. "Is there a problem?" he said, eyes darting between professor and student.

"Professor!" the boy breathed, side-stepping Severus before he had the chance to speak up, "Mr. Crouch is here – he's down in the forest, he wants to speak to you!"

Dumbledore snapped his eyes to Severus before quickly responding, "lead the way."

Severus watched with a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach as the Headmaster swept off along the corridor behind the boy.

XOX

Severus was pacing within his quarters, firewhiskey in hand as he held a very thorough conversation within his head. Part of him hoped Olivia wouldn't come tonight, he needed time to think. Another part of him longed to hold her, take her, make her his while he still had the chance.

He stopped in front of the fireplace, staring into the embers while he rested his head against the mantle. He lightly bumped his head against the stone, not enough to hurt, just enough to feel. He had been numb since he left the Headmaster's office. His mind and soul were in agony.

What should he do about Olivia? The Headmaster had a point, she would be a liability. He still had nightmares from Lily. From finding out about her death… a death he caused and a life debt owed to her son. He couldn't live through that again.

Should the Dark Lord return, however, which he was now convinced was a matter of when, not if, he likely wouldn't have long to live himself. Was he willing to put Olivia through that kind of pain? Could he live with the knowledge that she could be used against him? Constranly dangled over his head to keep him in line. Tortured, maimed, killed, or… worse. Oh yes, the Dark Lord knew no bounds when it came to the control he held over his followers; he'd do anything to ensure their loyalty. Severus would rather suffer at the hands of the Dark Lord and live a cold half-life without his partner, than allow any harm come to her, be it from his death or her torture.

His brain, which was now thoroughly pickled in the smoky alcohol, transitioned quickly from Olivia to the return of the Dark Lord. 14 years ago this was discussed, he knew his role. The Dark Lord would return. Severus would return to his services. Voldemort would fall, and likely, so would the Potions Master. Before, this wasn't an issue, he welcomed it. A life for a life, a debt he was more than willing to pay. But now…now he wanted to live.

Severus took the final swig of amber liquid before throwing the bottle into the fire, glass glittering his floor. He had finally made up his mind. The only logical thing to do, would be to get rid of his reason to live. Then, he would be free to lay down his life. After all, you can't win against someone who has nothing to lose.

There was a knock at his door. She came.

Of course she did.