Part II
(Current, Sengoku Period, mid-Bushuugi...)
A torrential rain pour had begun in the country side, causing rivulets of water to flood the streets of the small, sparsely inhabited village. Water slashed against tree leaves, battered the tops of thatched homes, and created muddy puddles that pooled at the bottom of hills and filled up the divots created by cart wheels. Outside of the patter of raindrops, there was no sound in the village and no one ventured out into the storm. The few buildings that comprised of the village were lit up with warm firelight from their occupants. On the far end of the village stood a single large building utilized for storing goods and outside of it, a lone figure stood gazing up into the rain.
It had been a long time since Rin had last traveled outside of Kaede's village. Her feet had grown callused again from the many miles of walking and she stood now with her toes free of the rope sandals that she had been wearing since leaving. They were more practical for traveling a long way than her other footwear and she had only worn them after Jaken had scolded her for attempting to leave Kaede's without any shoes at all. If it had been up to her, she would have gone barefoot as she had done as a child.
She had been deeply relieved that Sesshomaru had chosen to bring her with them when they decided to seek out Bushuugi. Outside of her fear of being targeted again, left only with Sango and Miroku as protection, her heart had been heavy with Kagome's disappearance. She knew, just as Sesshomaru had said, that she could not control what Kagome had done and there was very little else that she could have done to change the course of that moment. It did not make her feel any less guilty. Inuyasha had not said anything directly to her about Kagome's disappearance and while he had treated her the same as always, she hated to see the shadows behind his eyes when he thought no one was looking. She wished that she could have been taken instead, yet the thought of putting Sesshomaru through such trouble similarly pained her. No matter how she looked at it, there was no easy alternative to what had happened.
It had been this plaguing thought that had brought Rin outside for some fresh air. The village had given them use of the store room to sleep in overnight, recognizing Inuyasha from when he had passed through earlier that year. Most of the time, she was able to keep her mind occupied and distracted from the thought of Kagome trapped in Bushuugi's castle. She spent most of her time watching Kouga, who had been avoiding talking to either her or Sesshomaru during their travels from Kaede's village. In fact, he had been rather quiet altogether. It had taken her a long time to grow comfortable in his company and even after torturing herself by watching the wolf demon and curling up next to Sesshomaru to fall asleep at night, no amount of exhaustion would ease her conscience.
"You look tired," Kohaku's voice broke into her thoughts, causing her to start in alarm. She had not heard him come outside to join her.
She looked down at her feet, digging her toes a little in the dirt. "I'm not used to traveling anymore, I guess."
"You're holding up pretty well. You haven't complained even once."
Rin smiled to herself at this remark.
When she had first began traveling with Sesshomaru, her feet, legs, and hips had been so stiff and sore from the repetitive movement of walking for hours. The arches of her feet would ache painfully and her hips would get so stiff that she had begun to believe they would lock up in such a way that she would never be able to bend down again. At the end of the day when Sesshomaru and Jaken stopped for the night, she would stretch herself out and inspect the new blisters on her toes and the bleeding cracks of her heels. After washing them out with water and smearing an herbal concoction she had learned over the years for cuts, she would gratefully roll onto her back at night and fall asleep staring up at the stars or leaves of trees.
She had done this ritual for nearly a month until one day, as she was rubbing her feet and staring up at a particularly bright star, Sesshomaru had announced to Jaken that he was leaving and for them to stay there. As he made to walk past them, he caught sight of the dried blood on the bottom of Rin's feet and had stopped, frowning at her. Hastily, she dropped her foot to the ground, turning her round-eyed gaze to him.
"Rin."
She had tucked her feet underneath herself, more conscious than ever of how mangled they must have looked. Even as a child, she had wanted to impress Sesshomaru in her own way, of showing that she was capable of caring for herself so that she would not hinder him in his quest. She had not wanted him to see her in pain or even acknowledge that she might not be handling the traveling as well as they did. It was her child's ego that had come into play and her fear of being a problem rather than an asset to Sesshomaru.
"Yes, Lord Sesshomaru?"
"Do your feet hurt?" Rin had hesitated, dropping her gaze, causing Sesshomaru to add, "Don't bother lying. This Sesshomaru will know."
"They do," Rin had answered slowly, "but it's okay."
Sesshomaru had eyed her for a few moments before saying, "Jaken. Go get the dragon beast for her."
"B-but, my lord...," Jaken had tentatively said, "I thought you were leaving?"
"Then you had best not waste my time."
It had taken Jaken more than two nights to fetch A-Un while Sesshomaru remained with Rin, continuing on foot with her trailing behind him. He had said nothing about her feet after Jaken's grumpy departure, nor did she bring up the strangeness of his comment while they traveled alone. It was only when Jaken returned with A-Un and Sesshomaru had picked her up and deposited her onto the back of the dragon beast that she had understood. Only after that did he depart, leaving Jaken and Rin alone together and with her to stare at the inquiring gaze of the two-headed beast. It had been one of the few gestures in their early acquaintance that had reinforced her belief that, like she had thought when she first encountered Sesshomaru, there was a kindness to him that even he had not recognized.
Now, as she thought of that memory, she could not help but smile. She knew that she would never complain of how tired or sore she was from the grueling hours of trekking or even the weather. Like when she had been a child, she did not want to burden Sesshomaru with the knowledge that she was uncomfortable. She had wanted to be as resilient as he or Jaken were when traveling and, knowing that she was already being kept close to remain safe, she could never conceive voicing a complaint to him or anyone else. It was enough that she was lucky enough to be free, that she could walk alongside him and the others. She did not take for granted that, unlike Kagome right then, she was with her partner, even if her feet ached.
"I have it easy," she told Kohaku presently. "And my body will get used to it. That's what happened last time. I was really proud of how strong my feet got by the time I started living with Kaede! I could climb trees pretty well. Besides, I don't want to worry anyone. If I'm strong, then I can protect myself a little."
Kohaku looked at her curiously. "You don't honestly think that anyone expects you to, do you?"
"No, but I'd like to."
"Why? Because of what happened to Kagome?"
"Not exactly." She sent him a sidelong glance. "I know why you asked Lord Sesshomaru to come. You're not very clever in hiding things from me."
"I don't ever think I'm clever," he joked, shifting a bit in sudden embarrassment. "What I said to Lord Sesshomaru was true – I wouldn't lie to him. But yeah, of course I'm worried about you. Not because I think you're weak or anything. I just feel like you have a bigger target on your back than you think, especially now."
"Why do you say that?"
Kohaku rubbed the back of his head, frowning out at the landscape. "I've talked to Jaken and Inuyasha about what's going on and I don't think it's as simple as Bushuugi not liking someone or it just being a fight between two demons. Even Inuyasha said he thinks its political. Sango and I both had to study demon territories when we were kids, so I know a little bit about their land structure there. What we had were outdated maps from when their dad was still alive and it marked where the dog demon clan's lands were and what treaties they had. He had made a treaty with the demon slayers a long time ago, promising to protect the humans in that realm and, if rogue demons went into his territories, we had jurisdiction there to fulfill demon contracts. From what I remember, he had the majority of the land in the west, which is why I think he had the title of Lord of the Western Lands. It could mean that whoever has the most amount of land and is able to get enough support will get that title."
"But isn't that Lord Sesshomaru's title?"
"I don't know. I always kind of got the impression that he didn't care about that kind of thing. But if it's just a bloodline thing, that would give Bushuugi incentive to want to get rid of him and Inuyasha and especially you and Kagome." Kohaku sighed, dropping his hand to clasp the back of his neck. "That's why I thought I should be here. Lord Sesshomaru can keep you safe without me, I know that, but wouldn't it be better for him to be able to concentrate on fighting knowing that I've got your back?"
"I know. I'm sure he's thought of that, too," Rin said, turning away from him with a frown. "I just hate that I can't do anything for myself."
"Don't say that. You've come a long way, even in the last two years. Your archery's really good and you managed to keep yourself safe from Hiroshi, too. It's not like you can't do anything at all. You just have to keep practicing is all."
"I hear that a lot." She smiled quickly to dispel any bitterness behind the words.
Kohaku gave a tiny smile in return. "Inuyasha and I are going to scout ahead tomorrow to see how the mountain pass is. After we cross these mountains, we'll officially be in Lord Sesshomaru's lands. I've never been this far west before."
"Me neither."
He leaned forward slightly to look at her. "What's going on, Rin? Why're you out here?"
She hesitated, not meeting his gaze. She trusted Kohaku and knew that she could talk to him about anything, yet also still worried about leaning on him too heavily. He had said he wanted to be friends and she knew he was here with her interests in mind, but it disconcerted her to think that he might be taking comfort in her company in some way. She knew that it was not so simple to separate friendship and a deeper type of love. She had tried doing that for years with Sesshomaru with little luck. She could remember how much she had tortured herself and did not want to inflict the same type of pain.
At the same time, she did not want to avoid him or isolate him, either. As his friend, she would ask him for advice and knew that he would speak honestly, regardless of whether the words would hurt her ego. He had never shied away from conflict and was unafraid of laying out facts. His feelings for her had never altered that aspect of his character.
"I can't stop feeling like so much of this is my fault," she quietly admitted. "If I had stayed with Kaede that night rather than tried to fight with Kagome or if I hadn't been in the village at all, then Bushuugi wouldn't have come to there at all. Or...if I had never met Lord Sesshomaru – "
"Have you talked to him about this?" Kohaku interrupted.
"Well, yes, of course."
"What did he say?"
She grimaced. "He said it was his and Inuyasha's fault."
"Then why are you blaming yourself?"
"Because that's not how I see it. How could they predict where Bushuugi was or where Kagome and I were?"
Kohaku crossed his arms, his gaze dropping to the ground. When he spoke, he did so in a slow, methodical manner like a man choosing his words carefully. "I agree with Lord Sesshomaru. Inuyasha had been saying he felt something was going to happen that night. He should have prioritized being in the village with Kagome rather than going on the outskirts. Neither of them should have been doing patrols away from you or Kagome. And, honestly, it's their fault for taking humans as wives. That automatically puts you both in danger. I'm not saying that makes it right, but that's how it is. I know how you are, Rin – you've got a big heart. But Kagome wouldn't want you to beat yourself up for this and..." He hesitated, looking suddenly uncomfortable. "I hate to say this, but if she dies, there's less of a loss. Lord Sesshomaru could revive her with Tenseiga. That's not true for you anymore. When you die, that's it. You can't come back. He's already gone into the netherworld and brought you back with the meido stone. It would be a miracle if he found another way to bring you back from the dead."
"That almost makes it sound like Kagome's life is worth less."
"I know that's how it sounds. That's not what I'm trying to say, I just – " He suddenly stopped himself, raising his hands and dropping them in exasperation. "Everybody here loves you and care about you, including Kagome. Nobody wants to see you die. And you're talking like she got killed, but even Inuyasha now is convinced that Bushuugi kept her alive. Don't waste the chance that she gave you to be free because I don't think that's going to be the only attempt he makes to take you from Lord Sesshomaru. Focus on now and don't let the guilt weigh you down. You need every bit of energy and strength for this journey."
Rin gave him a tremulous smile. "You're right. Thank you, Kohaku."
"Don't thank me," he said briskly. "We've been through way worse, so I know you've got this."
She nodded and, feeling a little less glum, decided it was time to go back inside. A wind had begun to pick up, causing sharp rain to hit them and rattle the doors behind them. She ushered for him to follow her inside and the two of them stepped into the warmth of the storage building, closing the doors behind them. Unlike the breezy, coolness outside, the air here was thick with tension. Jaken was poking at the fire in the irori, oblivious to it while Inuyasha made a show of cleaning out his ear with his pinky finger, appearing resigned. Sesshomaru, who was sitting against one of the walls, glanced over at the pair when they walked in while Kouga glared daggers at him from his crouched position on the other end of the room.
Rin took all of this in, surprised that neither she nor Kohaku had heard any signs of disruption outside. She cast an inquiring look to him, to which he shrugged in response. Evidently there had been no argument when he had left to join her.
She was about to speak up when Inuyasha broke the awkward silence.
"I'm not surprised, really," he said, inspecting his pinky with a nonchalant air. "I don't know why you are. We've both seen demon tribes kill each other off."
"That's not how the wolf demon tribe is!" Kouga snarled, whipping around to face Inuyasha. "We've never been like that!"
"What other motivations does Bushuugi have for targeting your tribe then? What Sesshomaru said makes sense – obviously the western wolf demon clan made an alliance with him for some reason, we just don't know what he's getting from them in return for all of this."
"An army," Sesshomaru said calmly. "Bushuugi lost most of his men when he tried to face me. He'll try to use other demon lords and clans this time."
"That's just not possible!" Kouga shook his head in disbelief. "I've seen Kinrokuro, stayed with his family, even hunted with them. I haven't given him a reason to go after us like that."
"You clearly don't understand how demons operate in the west," Sesshomaru remarked. "They don't need a reason to kill you. All they care about is whether you're in their way."
"I've given Kinrokuro everything he's asked for – "
"Would you actually listen for once?" Inuyasha snapped, having grown irritated with Kouga's defensive arguments. "Isn't it obvious what he's saying? Kinrokuro wants to be the wolf demon tribe leader. You even said yourself that you got resistance from all of the clans when you came to power because of how young you were and the northern clan even broke off from the tribe because of it. It doesn't matter what you gave him if all he wants is you dead."
Kouga stared at him, stunned. All of the blood had drained from his face and he slowly sank back to the ground, his back slumping in a defeated posture. From her vantage point, Rin could not help but feel some semblance of pity for him. It reminded her powerfully of her own fractured friendships, to think that those who had once been friends were no better than a common enemy. She was sure, after all that the wolf demon had endured, that he was experiencing this in a much larger degree.
"I knew that they didn't like me, but I never would have thought they'd go to these lengths," Kouga said in a hollow voice. He stirred slightly, raising his head to look at Sesshomaru again. "But how did you find that out? How do you know that Kinrokuro made an alliance with Bushuugi?"
"I can answer that," Jaken said from his position by the irori, causing Kouga to look at him. "Bushuugi had promised a portion of land where multiple human settlements were to Kinrokuro's clan, along with helping eliminate the eastern and northern wolf demon clans. But that land was Lord Sesshomaru's father's – he had not taken it over yet and had no right to promise it to the wolf demon clan. One of the settlements was a village that the Great Dog Demon had created for a half-demon settlement and they told me that the wolf demons had been raiding them and saying it was their clan's land now by order of the new Lord of the Western Lands. Of course, I thought they meant Lord Sesshomaru!"
"Bushuugi's calling himself that already?" Inuyasha asked, scowling.
"So it would appear! I immediately consulted with Lord Sesshomaru and when we caught one of the wolf demons that were raiding the village, he confirmed that it had been Bushuugi who had promised the land to Kinrokuro. Since we were in the Western Lands this past year, they haven't raided those lands. He might be biding his time, waiting for more news from Bushuugi."
"All of this for land and a title," Kouga muttered in disgust.
"Don't act like you're any better," Inuyasha said to him sourly. "You were just as bad – the only difference is you went after Shikon shards."
"To protect my people! I wasn't out killing my own tribesman for them!"
"Maybe that's how he sees it."
"We shouldn't fight amongst ourselves," Kohaku broke in when Kouga made to angrily reply. "Bushuugi will use that to our advantage if we give him the chance. Bringing up the past will only lead to a fractured group."
"You sound like Miroku," Inuyasha grumbled, crossing his arms in something of a defensive posture.
"Kagome wouldn't want you two to fight, either," he added, with a glance towards Kouga. "You should at least respect that."
The two of them settled into a brooding silence, neither of them looking at either each other or Kohaku. His words seemed to have affected them enough to make them silent. Even though Kagome was not present, the reminder that she would not approve of their bickering was enough to sway them. It was a calculated move on Kohaku's part, mentioning her. Rin had to give Kohaku credit in knowing how to manage people when it was needed.
Jaken had returned to poking at the fire, feeding it another piece of wood while Rin slowly made her way from the doors to join Jaken at the warmth. She stretched her hands out, unbothered by the exchange for the most part. Living in the same village as Inuyasha, one became accustomed to arguments breaking out and, traveling with Sesshomaru, she was all too familiar with people becoming offended by him.
"It could be useful to try and win the wolf demon clan over," Kohaku said after some minutes, breaking the heavy silence that had fallen over the group. "Or at the very least, if we could ensure they remain uninvolved. Lord Sesshomaru could give them land if that's all they wanted as a means of promising his silence."
Jaken frowned and glanced uneasily at Sesshomaru, causing Rin's gaze to also drift toward him. Sesshomaru's eyes had darkened slightly, the only sign that there was something in that suggestion that displeased him.
"Lord Sesshomaru can't," Jaken said, returning his gaze to the fire and giving it a vigorous jab.
"What do you mean? He's the Lord of the Western Lands – he has the authority."
"Nobody holds that title. Ever since the Great Dog Demon died, his lands have remained unconquered and the title died with him. The only people who have a real claim to the title are Lord Sesshomaru and Inuyasha, but neither of them have taken it. Until then, none of the other demon lords can take it."
"That should be easy to do, though, isn't it? I would assume that it's just a matter of proving one's lineage."
"Weren't you trained in the politics of demons? Isn't that part of being a demon slayer?" Jaken asked him with a suspicious glance. "It's not as easy as coming in and saying that you're the Great Dog Demon's son. Lord Sesshomaru never established himself in the west and because the demon lords don't approve of him or Inuyasha, his authority at granting land to any of the clans would be put into question and no clan in the west that has a brain would accept such a proposal."
"You know, when I think about that, it doesn't make sense," Inuyasha said, frowning over at Sesshomaru. "Why didn't you take dad's title?"
"I don't negotiate with idiots," Sesshomaru answered, closing his eyes and leaning his head back against the wall.
"Right," was Inuyasha's sarcastic reply. "I should've guessed as much."
Looking over at Sesshomaru, though, Rin suspected that he had not been entirely honest. There were very few times that Sesshomaru had ever spoken of his father and, even as a child, she had taken note of it and respected it. Just as how Sesshomaru never asked further about her parents than to discover they were no longer alive, she had never pried into that area of his life. The spare few times she had asked about his childhood or when his father had been alive, his answers had been brief. Now that they were returning to the west, she doubted that Sesshomaru's attitude towards that would change.
Kouga had chimed in to discuss possibilities with Kohaku, the idea seeming to bolster his spirit somewhat. Jaken, hearing them, had gotten up from the irori to join him and Kohaku. As he spoke, he made it apparent that both of them were depressingly lacking in demon history and needed to be properly educated. Rin almost laughed aloud as Jaken took on a familiar, lecturing tone that she had heard many times when she was a child. Inuyasha was watching them from afar, but did not seem inclined to make suggestions in regards to the wolf demon clan. Like so often, he did not appear present with them, his mind having drifted far away from the building and the other men's conversation.
With the others occupied, Rin left the irori to sit next to Sesshomaru, inching in as close as she dared so that she could feel the warmth of his body. Away from the fire and the discussions, she could hear the roar of rain outside now, spattering violently against the building. Inuyasha was the only one that might overhear their conversation, but he seemed so preoccupied with his own thoughts that she did not think he cared to know what she said to Sesshomaru. After ensuring that the other three men were deep in discussion, she put a hand on the top of Sesshomaru's thigh and leaned forward slightly to look up into his face.
"What is it?" he asked.
Rin vacillated beside him, watching Inuyasha stare at the three men with a shuttered expression. She had never been fearful of Bushuugi and, when she reflected as an adult, the only ones that had truly frightened her had been demons who seemed bereft of reason. Listening to Kohaku and the others talk of politics humanized the demon lords of the west in a way that made them seem almost predictable. She had full confidence in Sesshomaru's intellect and knew that, even though he was strong, he also never acted without conscious thought. He, above all the people she had met in her life, acted within the realm of logic. She did not think it was a game that Bushuugi would be able to beat him at it.
In spite of that, she felt woefully ill-equipped to dive into a political battle. She had heard of the wars being the samurai warlords in the human provinces and when Miroku would try to teach her and the other children, she found herself mixing up families and quickly losing track of alliances. It had all seemed unnecessarily convoluted. She knew that Sesshomaru likely considered it a waste of time to discuss politics, but she hated feeling stupid and had no patience to listen to a full historical lesson from Jaken. She wanted a truncated version that would give her at least some idea of things.
"How many clans do you think Bushuugi has tried to get help from?" she asked him after a few seconds pause.
"Enough to make him feel safe."
"Well...why don't they challenge you for the title?"
Sesshomaru opened his eyes and she heard him release the smallest of breaths, as if he were frustrated with her questions. Nonetheless, he glanced down at her and said, "The title itself is meaningless. They came up with it when they moved from the north and south to settle there. Before that, it was only my father and a few smaller demon clans and mostly human settlements. Bushuugi's convinced them that, with their alliance behind them, they stand a chance against me. Their goal is to have a puppet that will drive the humans out of the west. Their mistake is thinking none of them are the puppets instead."
Rin smiled. As expected, Sesshomaru knew her intentions better than anyone else would and had broken it down into the simplest of explanations. Like himself, she did not care to know which clans were in power, who were allied with the others, or any of the finer details that Jaken prided himself on knowing. She simply wanted to know the motivation behind it all and how it related to Sesshomaru and now, to her.
"When you leave after all of this, what will happen? Won't another demon try to do the same thing as Bushuugi?"
"Inevitably."
"About how many years?"
"It's irrelevant."
Rin had to laugh, causing Inuyasha to glance over their way in confusion. Sesshomaru looked at her and then ran a hand over her hair before his hand landed on her opposing shoulder. She obligingly leaned in closer to him, resting the back of her head against his shoulder. She liked Sesshomaru best when he was in one of his particularly stubborn moods. Those were the times when Rin would enjoy watching the play of subtle expressions in his face, catching the slightest thought that might flit through his eyes. It had become one of her favorite past times, trying to discern his thoughts when he was not inclined to conversation. Even now, in spite of the somber tone of their trip and the strangeness of their group, she took pleasure in his eccentricities. He stood out amongst all the men with his behaviors, giving his general aura a different composition that she had never witnessed in another person. To another person, they would have found Sesshomaru's personality off-putting, but she found immense comfort in it.
Closing her eyes, she could hear the drumroll of the rain around them and the lull and peak of the men's voices, Kouga and Jaken's voices rising above Kohaku's calm, level one. Beneath it all, she could hear the subtle crackle of the fire popping and snapping. Even though her eyes were closed and she was taking in the accumulation of sound around her, she could feel Sesshomaru's gaze on her. Opening her eyes, she met his gaze from her comfortable position against his shoulder. His eyes were far clearer now, the dark storm that had lied there previously having faded. Her mouth curved in a smile as she stared up into his gaze. This was the expression she attributed to a satisfied Sesshomaru – calm and clear-eyed. It made her glad that she could ease some of his tempers.
He looked away from her, towards the group that was discussing the wolf demon clan. Inuyasha had gotten to his feet and was feeding the fire in the irori when Kouga called him over. The half-demon's mouth twisted in annoyance, but he reluctantly made his way over to them.
"Are you wanting to help the wolf demons?" Sesshomaru asked Rin. "They're worthless as warriors."
Rin blinked in surprise and straightened up, glancing from the group and back to him. She had not been expecting him to ask her opinion. "I don't think I'm the right person to ask, Lord Sesshomaru," she told him honestly. "Kohaku seems to think it might be useful, but I don't know anything about politics. It's not something I really tried to learn when Miroku was teaching us as kids." She plucked at her kimono absent-mindedly, embarrassed at the admittance. She was unsure why she suddenly felt embarrassed – surely Sesshomaru had noticed how poor of a student she had been when Jaken had tried to teach her anything.
"There's nothing to learn," he said, turning back to look at her. "It's useless knowledge. But there's value in your perspective."
It was such an innocuous statement, yet it made her flush with pleasure. It was not the type of compliment that girls like Hana and Akai would receive from the boys and, in truth, it was not romantic at all. To Rin, though, she was deeply flattered that he felt she could contribute in some way to the conversation even though she was no better versed in demon society than Inuyasha, who Sesshomaru insulted regularly. It was, she recognized, one of the few such small gestures he made to impress upon her that she was no longer just his travel companion or a mere acquaintance. It was Sesshomaru's subtle way of making the distinction and, while not romantic, it was a good deal more respectful than how most men treated their partners.
"Well," Rin said slowly, "it wouldn't hurt to have someone to distract the other demons. They probably have other allies and that could give us time to focus on Bushuugi. It might mean that Kouga stays with us, too. Him and Inuyasha can get Kagome away while you handle Bushuugi."
Sesshomaru stared at her, though there was an almost amused glint in his eyes. "I see."
"Wh-what?" Her face began to warm in renewed embarrassment. "Was that the wrong answer?"
"No," he replied, "only an interesting one."
"Lord Sesshomaru?"
He had rested his head back against the wall, closing his eyes. She took this to be his signal to end the conversation and, still feeling a bit flustered at his response, she settled back against his shoulder. As she rested back against him, tucking her legs underneath her, she saw Inuyasha glance towards them. She smiled quickly at him and he returned the smile a little more uncertainly. Inuyasha was not yet comfortable or accustomed to seeing the two of them together, something she was sure would take time.
The lull of the men's voices and the warmth of Sesshomaru and the mokomoko began to make her doze off. She did her best to stay awake in case another conversation broke out amongst them, but her head kept bobbing uncomfortably, jolting her awake. After a few times of this, Sesshomaru reached up behind her and moved her so she was nestling more comfortably. She gave a dainty yawn and smiled apologetically up at him before closing her eyes.
Almost thoughtfully, he said to her as she began to drift off to sleep, "You still manage to surprise me, Rin."
Inuyasha sighed, rubbing the back of his head as he stood at the top of the rocky pathway. Several days earlier, he and Kohaku had scouted the entrance to the mountain path and after spending the day trekking inside the mountain pass and finding it no more dangerous than expected, the pair had returned and given the clear to the remainder of the group to travel. The higher up they went in elevation, though, the colder it had become until a fine dusting of snow had begun to fall. There were patches of newly fallen snow and they had to make their way around precarious snow bridges and glacial ice falls that were too dangerous to tread upon. They had been making their way through the boulder field for the past two days, their advancements slow due to the uneven terrain and changeable weather. He and Sesshomaru could have easily made their way through the mountain pass without a problem, but their companions were not so well-equipped.
Kouga and Jaken, in spite of being demons, did not come from northern clans and could not handle the cold well. Kouga loudly complained when a particularly freezing wind whipped around him and Jaken had to be snatched by Kohaku or Rin in fear of him being blown off the mountain entirely. Kohaku was better at managing the cold, though when his skin began to look wind-chapped and a little too blue, he was forced to stop and briskly warm himself. Like Kohaku, Rin had no trouble with the cold, but the boulder field was providing a challenge for her. Inuyasha had kept an eye on her as she carefully wiggled her way between boulders and slogged through the scree on the mountain, half-expecting her to fall down or wrench her ankle. After a day of watching this, he voiced his surprise that A-Un had not accompanied them to which Jaken had said that he had sent A-Un ahead so as not to bring attention to their party. This made sense, of course, but Inuyasha thought that it made the travelling a fair bit more uncomfortable for Rin, though she never did complain.
Sesshomaru, surprisingly to him, did not offer to give Rin any help during their time in the mountain pass. Outside of occasionally stopping while she and Jaken caught up to him, he appeared to be unconcerned for her travel conditions. At night, Rin would bundle herself up by the fire next to Sesshomaru and outside of covering her feet with the mokomoko, she did not ask Sesshomaru to help with any sort of accommodation. This was clearly normal for the trio, as Jaken did not appear to be worried for Rin, either and similarly did not offer her anything.
Now, as a chilling wind tore through his hair and blasted snowflakes into his face, he glanced behind him. Kohaku was shielding his eyes, peering up at Inuyasha with squinted eyes. Rin was a few steps behind him, bracing Jaken against her legs so that he would not fall back down the slope. She did not seem bothered by the flurry, more worried about Jaken than herself. He supposed he had grown used to traveling with Kagome, who had always indulged in the finer comforts of her previous life. She would always have a pack full of snacks, would whine about being too cold or dirty until they stopped for the night, and would wake up in a terrible mood the next morning if they were forced to sleep out in the open without any type of shelter. Even Sango had been similarly spoiled, though her reactions had never been quite as dramatic.
I miss that, he thought with a pang, waiting as the rest of the group slowly made their way towards him. Sesshomaru had paused next to Rin and Jaken, causing her to give him a quick smile before urging Jaken ahead of her, her hands on his shoulders. That should've been me and Kagome.
Irritated with himself, he quickly shook the thought of his head as Kouga joined him at the top of the path while the others continued towards them. He knew he had been letting his bitterness get the best of him lately. Outside of the usual bandit and demon attacks, he and Kagome had lived a peaceful life ever since they settled in Kaede's village. When they had gotten married, he had made a vow to himself that she would not live a life of battle like Kikyo had and that she would not endure the pain that his mother had when she had been with his father. He had wanted a better life for her and himself – a simple life.
He had always known on some level that one day that would get disrupted and not purely because of his own existence; Kagome was now known as the Shikon Jewel priestess, the "Priestess from the Other World," and that brought on its own set of complications. They had been fortunate that the demons that sought her out in the past years had been easily eliminated, yet it was always in the back of his mind that the two of them, as a couple, would attract unwanted attention. He had never considered that attention from one of his father's old enemies would be included.
After he had time to process the events of that night when Kagome had been taken, he had been ashamed of his own ignorant behavior towards Rin. When Sesshomaru had come to him with the information about Bushuugi, he had been blindly hoping that he and Kagome could remain outside the sphere of his awareness, but deep down he had known that if it was related to his father, they would eventually be dragged into the mix. As soon as his existence became known, his father's old enemies were quick to enact revenge upon him in spite of him having nothing to do with the dog demon clan and having never even met his father. It was no less true with Bushuugi. All of his father's old enemies took particular issue with him when they realized he was alive, a bitter realization that he resented each time he encountered one of them. Him being a half-demon had always been enough to turn their anger towards him rather than Sesshomaru, who only remained their enemy because he was the demon lord son of Toga. It was his mistake in thinking that he could ever pretend that his existence and connection to the Great Dog Demon as his half-demon son would not offend the other demon lords.
Outside of that, though, he should have known that Kagome would intervene for Rin. He had witnessed her going out of her way for Rin enough times even before Rin began to live in the village to know that she had a soft spot for the younger girl. With the absence of her actual younger brother, Rin had become something like a sister to Kagome and the two girls had connected throughout their time in the past years. Without any family of her own, Rin had begun to view her and Inuyasha as her surrogate siblings, especially when the three of them had been living together under Kaede's roof. There were not so many years between them that there was a great gap in age, either, making it easy for the two girls to interact and share stories.
In spite of all of this, Inuyasha still had trouble managing his emotions when it came to traveling with Rin and Sesshomaru. He knew it was ridiculous to be jealous of Sesshomaru, who had far less time with Rin than Inuyasha had with Kagome, but renewed anger about his mother's death and envy towards Sesshomaru that he had spent time with their father made it difficult for him to think clearly. He saw too many similarities in Sesshomaru and Rin's situation that reminded him of his parents. Kagome had warned him not to make the comparison and while he had done well throughout the years in processing his feelings about his parents, something in it had roused familiar resentments.
He and Kagome, while an unorthodox couple, were different in the sense that he was only a half-demon and she had inherited much of Kikyo's powers as a priestess. Kagome had come a long way since she had first come to this world and was able to credibly defend herself if needed. He intuitively knew that she was still alive. He was sure that his soul would have cried out if she had died. If the roles had been reversed and Rin had been taken, he was not so sure that she would have been kept alive. There had been malicious intent behind Bushuugi's designs towards Rin, which had been clearly directed towards Sesshomaru. He, like Inuyasha, must have seen the similarities between Sesshomaru and their father. In all the years that Inuyasha had lived with his mother, he had never seen her trained or even lift a weapon. She had been even more defenseless than Rin, who at least had learned rudimentary skills. Both women had been revived by Tenseiga and both had initially died because of their involvement with demons. The only difference was that Inuyasha had to witness his mother's prolonged heartbreak at losing Toga, whereas Rin was given the chance to be with Sesshomaru after her life had been returned to her.
The comparison caused a torrent of confused emotions and thoughts to run through his head during their travels. Concern warred with anger, which conflicted with his more selfish side that wanted to remain uninvolved in his brother's affairs. He was holding his tongue more often these days when it came to Sesshomaru, a rare feat in and of itself. He could not justify exploding on him about his partner choices just then when they had bigger issues at the forefront of their minds.
"Just how long are we going to be on this damn mountain?" Kouga asked, interrupting Inuyasha's muddled thoughts.
"Dunno," he answered, batting at one of his ears to get snow out of it.
"Hey, imp!" Kouga turned, rubbing his arms briskly as Rin and Jaken approached them. "Don't you have a map or something?"
"Who carries maps?" Jaken demanded with a scowl and then thrust his staff towards him. "This is the false summit. You can see the summit through the clouds there. Once we ascend that, we will be on the other side of the mountain pass, which will be the start of the Great Dog Demon's lands."
"We're that close to my old man's land?" Inuyasha asked in surprise.
"He had control over most of the western land that lies beneath the mountain shadow here," Jaken explained patiently. "There are mountains to the northwestern region where Ryukotsusei's clan lives, along with the western wolf demon clan. The remaining demon lords are along the coast and on islands west of there. By the way, after Lord Sesshomaru returned, there aren't very many noble demon clans between here and there. Most are smaller clans that were already aligned with the dog demon clan and human and half-demon settlements."
"I didn't ask to be lectured."
"The estate is on the other side of the mountain, too." Jaken turned to look at Sesshomaru inquisitively. "A-Un should be there by now, my lord. Are we intending to stop there?"
"What estate?"
"Father's estate," Sesshomaru answered for Jaken, although he was now looking up into the flurry of snow.
Inuyasha frowned and then also looked skyward. Very faintly, in the distance they could hear a strange whistling carrying over the wind. The flurries had begun to pick up and the wind gusts, which had been relentless since that morning, showed no signs of abatement. He cocked his head, straightening one of his ears as he focused on the sound. The closer he listened, the more he realized that it was not the usual whistling that wind made through narrow rocks, but an ethereal, musical sound that rose high above them.
"This storm...it's a demon." Inuyasha said slowly.
"I don't sense anything," Kouga remarked. "Besides, you and Kohaku already checked the mountain pass – you said you didn't sense anything."
"And I don't right now, either," he answered irritably, putting his hand on Tessaiga. "That doesn't mean there's no one there."
"We can't fight against a storm," Kohaku said reasonably to Inuyasha before looking to Sesshomaru. "We're too vulnerable here. We should hurry to get to the mountain."
Rather than replying, Sesshomaru lowered his gaze and continued forward. Rin and Jaken followed after, their pace a little quicker than usual. Reluctantly, Inuyasha continued walking as well, though he glanced around to see if he could perceive any other demons. The snow was so thick around them, the cloud coverage so low that he could barely see anything in front of him.
It took them several hours to pass over the false summit and begin the perilous journey to traverse over the glacial fields to reach the other side of the mountain. The snowstorm, rather than quieting, grew more intense in nature. Once, Jaken nearly fell down the steep slope if not for Inuyasha deftly catching him. His hands had slipped off Nintojo, which he discovered Rin holding when they caught up to her and Sesshomaru. Relief washed over her face upon seeing Jaken being forcefully dragged by Inuyasha back to her.
They trudged through the snow, clustering close together so as not to lose one another. Visibility had become so poor that they could not see much in front of them. Sesshomaru had taken the lead, plowing forward determinedly without hardly a backward glance. Behind him, Rin kept her hand tight around Jaken's clothing and when Inuyasha got close enough, he could see the warning pinkness in her knuckles. Looking back, he saw that Kouga and Kohaku were also looking similarly frostbitten.
Inuyasha swore beneath his breath before stopping, forcing Kouga and Kohaku to halt their progress. "Sesshomaru! We can't stay in this storm! We can't even see where we're going!" The latter demon paused, glancing over his shoulder at him as Inuyasha pulled out Tessaiga.
"What do you expect that will do?" Sesshomaru asked him in a voice that was so quiet he barely heard him.
Inuyasha ignored the question and swung Tessaiga high above him. Dragon scales formed onto the blade and he concentrated, listening to the very faint whistling sound. This storm, he knew, could only be formed from demonic energy. There was no other way that a demon could summon such weather. With a powerful swing, he ripped through the energy and felt something like a tear, as if he had cut through a stack of papers.
There was the sound of ice falling somewhere and just as the clouds and snow began to fade, he saw a horrifying ice fall crashing towards them. Alarmed, he grabbed hold of Kohaku and he and Kouga leaped out of the way. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Sesshomaru sweep Rin up, who had a firm hold on Jaken. The group landed farther up the slope, watching an avalanche of snow cascade down below them, the ground trembling beneath them. The clouds had dissipated, leaving a bright blue sky in their wake and after the sound of the avalanche had faded, there was a startling silence that followed.
Releasing Kohaku, Inuyasha looked around at the eerily calm landscape. And then, just as he was convinced that he had killed the demon instead, a figure jumped nimbly in front of them from an outcrop of rocks.
"I wasn't expecting that," the woman said to them, eyeing Inuyasha with some interest, her eyes resting on Tessaiga. "It's been a long time since I've seen that sword. What memories!"
Inuyasha inspected her critically. By all appearances, she appeared human except for the strange hue of pinkness of her skin and startling green eyes. She reminded him of a noblewoman, her black hair piled high and wearing what appeared to be a white, silk kimono. When she smiled at him, she bared sharp teeth and looking closer, he saw the deadly sharp ends of her nails. With that expression, there was no doubt that she was a demon.
"Who the hell are you?" Inuyasha asked at last.
"Ujihime," she replied with a sarcastic little bow, "demon princess of the macaque monkey clan."
"That clan died off years ago," Kouga spoke up, scowling at her. "Don't try and pass yourself off as a princess."
"Many of us died off – not all," she corrected him with a disparaging glance. Her gaze landed on Sesshomaru and then Rin, who he still had tucked against his side. Her mouth stretched into a wider smile. "So, what Bushuugi said is true. The great Lord Sesshomaru really does have a human for a mate." She released a shriek of laughter, clapping her hands. "Oh, this really does take me back! Like father, like son, eh? Toga would have been proud."
Sesshomaru simply stared at her, neither threatened nor provoked by her words.
Ujihime smirked, tapping her chin with a finger meditatively. "I can't wait to see you cry when we tear her apart."
"This Sesshomaru," he said then, releasing Rin and pulling out Bakusaiga, "does not cry."
Just as Sesshomaru swung his blade, Inuyasha rushed over to Rin. Ujihime had moved to dodge Sesshomaru's attack and, it appeared, to try and use her energy to knock Rin away from Sesshomaru while he was distracted. Both he and Sesshomaru caught the move first and as Sesshomaru directed another attack at Ujihime, Inuyasha caught hold of Rin before the energy hit her.
"Thanks," she said breathlessly.
"Yeah, well, don't thank me yet," he grumbled, shaking out Tessaiga. The dragon scales faded and instead, the blade was surrounded by flames. He swung Tessaiga, a tunnel of fire soaring towards where Ujihime and Sesshomaru were battling.
Ujihime jumped back, cursing as her hand was burned. She held her hand and then punched the air, which made snow fly up from in front of her. They were hit with the heavy snow, pushing them back down the slope, towards the avalanche and ice fall. Inuyasha kept his hold on Rin, slashing at the snow, melting it as it tried to bury him. A quick glance when he surfaced showed that everyone else, including Jaken, were unharmed.
"This is fun and all," Ujihime said with a flutter of her fingertips, "but I'm only here as the welcoming party."
As she made to leave, Sesshomaru's green whip caught her ankle and made her crash back into the snow. Before she was able to get back to her feet or form an attack, he gave it a quick tug, dragging her along the snow. She scrabbled desperately, but as snow and ice went barreling towards him, he cut through it effortlessly with Bakusaiga. He stepped aside and released the whip from her ankle as she went sliding past him. With a quick, effortless movement, the tip of his blade found its target. When the momentum of her sliding stopped her, she rolled to her knees, panting frantically and grabbing at her torso. A brief look of relief crossed her face until she, like all the others, saw the stain of blood in the snow. Warily, she raised her hand to her face where Sesshomaru had cut a distinctive marking alongside her scarlet face.
"Take that as a warning to the other demon lords," Sesshomaru told her, sheathing his sword. "The next time I see you, I'll have your head."
"I-I-I could be an ally," Ujihime stuttered, the arrogance from moments ago long gone. "W-we could form a similar agreement to the one your father and my clan had."
"Could be useful," Kouga said thoughtfully. He, Kohaku, and Jaken had made their way back to where Sesshomaru and Inuyasha were standing.
Sesshomaru glanced at Inuyasha, though his gaze was not on him, but Rin, who was still held propped against his shoulder in one of his arms.
"No," Sesshomaru said flatly, looking back to Ujihime.
"'No'?" she repeated incredulously.
"I'd leave now if I were you," Inuyasha advised, hearing the tone of finality in his voice. "While he's still giving you a chance."
Ujihime frowned at him and then swayed to her feet, blood dripping from her face onto the pristine white of her kimono. She was still staring at Sesshomaru in disbelief. Fear seemed to have left in the wake of indignation. "My clan has always had an alliance with the dog demon clan. Even when we strayed a bit out of curiosity – after all, we're a very, uh, playful type – the Great Dog Demon always was understanding. That's how it's always been! I used to tease him about Izayoi, too, he never threatened to kill me over it."
"Your mistake is in thinking I'm like my father," Sesshomaru told her. "You should know now that I'm not."
Ujihime opened her mouth and then snapped it shut, seeming to think better of it. Without another word, she lifted a hand and a brief flurry of snow passed through, taking her with it. With her disappearance, the snowfield was once again cast in a bright sunshine, the blue sky stretching long and clear above them, and the top of the true summit only a few hours walk away. The silence of the mountain, though, was deafening.
Sesshomaru had not bothered to ask anyone else's opinion in regards to gaining an ally, but no one there was fool enough to bring attention to that fact. It was evident that his decision had been entirely predicated on Ujihime's comments and threats towards Rin. His actions showed how little he cared for maneuvering through demon politics in order to win against Bushuugi. Ujihime had not been expecting his reaction, thinking that he would endure her dangerous manner of playing in the same way that their father had done – this had only been a greater offense. If Sesshomaru had not rejected her offer, Inuyasha would have made it plain what he thought of her idea of 'teasing.' Inuyasha had a strong feeling they were going to encounter more demons here that thought Sesshomaru would be as forgiving as their father. It was a deadly mistake to make, especially in regards to Rin.
Rin began to shift out of Inuyasha's grasp and he obligingly released her to stand again. She crossed the snow to Sesshomaru, took one look into his face and then kicked some snow over the blood, bowing her head as she covered it up. No one else dared to move or speak, sensing the demon lord's deadly aura.
"I never liked monkeys," she said into the silence. "They throw rocks at you if you get too close." She smiled up at Sesshomaru. "I'm ready if everyone else is."
The simplicity of it broke the tension.
Kohaku relaxed somewhat and he and Jaken picked their way through the snow towards the pair, saying, "Let's get going. With the storm gone, we should be able to make good time."
Sesshomaru did not immediately look at Rin after her comment, staring out at the mountain for several seconds until he at last turned to her. His expression was as unchanged as ever, which was perhaps a good indication that any temper from earlier had disappeared. As Kohaku passed, she cast Sesshomaru one last, warm smile and then joined him and Jaken in striding through the snow.
"If Kin'u and Gyokuto were here, they would love the snow," Rin said to Kohaku conversationally.
"Those wretched creatures would be insufferable," Jaken said, although with an almost fond tone.
"Wasn't there one winter where they made you into a snowman?"
"It's a disgrace to my lineage, being used as a common children's prop!"
The three of them continued this conversation, Kohaku chiming in to reminisce about the river icing over that winter and the children sliding down it. Sesshomaru did not immediately follow the trio, glancing over his shoulder at where Rin had kicked snow over the blood. Even though his mood had shifted back to normal, there was still a brooding air about him that made Inuyasha suspect his mind was elsewhere. After a time, he turned and followed the three up the mountain, leaving the other two behind.
Kouga cast Inuyasha an inquiring look, but he merely shrugged, sheathing Tessaiga. Not even he could explain Sesshomaru's behavior to anyone, nor was he about to try within earshot of him. Rin, apparently, was the only one who understood him.
In spite of Kohaku's optimism, the group did not make it to the bottom of the summit that evening, let alone to the dog demon clan estate. There were no renewed storms and as the descent from the summit was much faster, they managed to make it halfway down before it would be too dark to travel safely. As luck would have it, they had stumbled upon an abandoned warming shelter near a hot spring before sunset. The buildings were somewhat dilapidated, but the pools of hot water had not yet dried up and were still delightfully warm. It had been Inuyasha who had made the decision to stay there that night, even though Kohaku and Kouga both were eager to press on. They had been holding a grueling pace set by Kohaku and while Inuyasha did not revel in the idea of sleeping on the same mountain that Ujihime might be on, he also did not want to deal with a surprise attack in the dark.
Kouga and Kohaku went ahead of them to survey the buildings, leaving Inuyasha behind with Sesshomaru and Rin. Jaken looked more exhausted than Rin, giving a loud sigh and following the two with a weary trudge. Kouga yelled back at him to hurry, causing the little imp to pick up the speed of his scamper towards the two men. Inuyasha side-eyed the other two when they had gone, noticing that neither Sesshomaru nor Rin had said much to each other on the trek after the encounter with Ujihime. It did not seem they were inclined towards conversation just then, either.
It only occurred to him when he was alone with them that he had never really spent any time with Rin and Sesshomaru when it was just the three of them, not even when she had been younger. Any time that Sesshomaru had been in the village, he tended to remain away from the rest of the village or, if he ventured in, Inuyasha had been with Kagome or in his own group when encountering them and Jaken was usually only a few steps behind Sesshomaru. Even while traveling together now, Kouga and Kohaku had always been with them. He had, of course, observed them from afar, yet had no reason to approach Sesshomaru or Rin previously.
It was, he had to admit to himself, strange to look at them up close together. Without Jaken there, something in the lens that he viewed them shifted. Inuyasha had always had trouble differentiating the teenagers in his mind, something that Sango had scolded him for previously when he had gotten into the habit of treating Kohaku as a kid even after he had turned fifteen. It had taken Kohaku being away from Sango and the other teenagers for him to see the subtle appearance differences. It seemed he had a similar problem with Rin. Without Jaken, the noticeable difference in her maturity was clearer to him. She was still slight for her age, true, but somewhere down the line, she had developed a woman's form and her round face had filled out into delicate angles and lines.
There was also the air of familiarity between Sesshomaru and Rin. He had seen Rin touch Sesshomaru from time to time, the barest of touches between two people and she usually slept between him and Jaken at night while he remained awake. It was not that intimate, really, when one witnessed it, so it was strange that when they stood together, he could find anything noteworthy in their dispositions. The way that Rin stood next to Sesshomaru, however, was that of a partner of equal respect. She was not keeping distance behind him as she once had done and Sesshomaru had remained close enough to her that she could have touched his arm if she wanted. Inuyasha could not think of anyone that he had seen stand so close to Sesshomaru without it ending in their death or otherwise injured. He doubted he would have allowed it from anyone else.
It embarrassed him to consider any of this. Inuyasha dropped his gaze to the snow, toeing it idly as he waited for the other three to return. He felt awkward for some reason, like a son waiting with his parents. He knew this was ridiculous, especially considering Rin was the youngest out of all of them. Part of it was that he disliked thinking of Sesshomaru as a normal person with the same drives and desires as himself. Even when he had known Sesshomaru cared for Rin, he never stopped to consider why; in fact, he had been happy to keep his mind from wandering there, knowing that it would make his perception of him too convoluted. But ever since he and returned and learned of their partnership, Inuyasha could not avoid the questions running through his head. They were questions that always led him back to his father and what he had known had been a deep hatred for his mother on Sesshomaru's part.
When Kouga returned to cheerfully tell them the building was empty and that Kohaku and Jaken had found somewhere to start a fire and rest for the night, Inuyasha almost ran in relief at no longer being alone with Sesshomaru and Rin. They followed Kouga to the building that, while damaged, was at least dry and seemed to be the most secure area of the old shelter. The irori was broken, but Jaken had managed to coax a fire alive while Kohaku set up meat to roast.
"Your feet are bleeding," Kohaku said in alarm when Rin took off her shoes as soon as they were inside. She wiggled her toes experimentally and then shrugged.
"It's not that bad," she told him. "It's mostly dried, anyway."
"Kohaku," Sesshomaru spoke up from the doorway. He had not entered the room, still standing outside on the engawa. "Take her to the hot springs for her feet." Without another word, he turned away and disappeared behind the wall, leaving Kohaku staring at where he had been with a baffled expression.
Rin giggled, covering her mouth quickly when she caught sight of his frown.
"Should we really be going outside? It's dark out," Kohaku said almost to himself.
"Lord Sesshomaru is probably going to keep watch," Jaken told him tiredly from his spot by the fire. Kohaku perked up a bit at this and looked to Rin inquiringly.
"They're just going to bleed again tomorrow," Rin said, setting her damp shoes by the fire, "but at least it'll make them feel better for the night. Come on, Kohaku – you should soak yours, too." She made her way to the doorway and said to the room at large, "We won't be long!"
"I'll be right back," Inuyasha said to Kouga and Jaken, following the two of them outside.
He closed the door behind him, watching Kohaku and Rin make their way towards a small pool near the steps. Rin quickly sat down, submerging her feet and releasing a sigh as she leaned back upon her palms. They were not far from the building, so if anything happened, they would be able to come to their aid quickly. Looking around, he spotted Sesshomaru standing on top of one of the badly damaged buildings with a good vantage of all of the springs that were near them. Pulling himself up onto the roof, Inuyasha made his way to the one that Sesshomaru was on, springing across the gap to land nimbly on the other side where the roof had begun to concave.
Sesshomaru did not acknowledge him, instead watching Rin and Kohaku's silhouettes at the spring. Kohaku was saying something that made Rin laugh, though Inuyasha did not catch what he had said as he had not been paying them any mind. Standing there next to Sesshomaru, he hesitated on whether or not to say anything. Given Sesshomaru's reaction earlier and all of his interactions regarding the subject, Inuyasha knew their father was a sensitive topic and that clearly had not changed over the years; nonetheless, now that they were going directly to the clan estate, he felt it was better to at least air out some things.
Kagome would have been proud of him. Shoving every thought and emotion down as far as he could had been his way of handling conflict until meeting her. The years spent with her had made at least a little progress on that front, not that he would ever give her props to her face.
"I got a question for you," Inuyasha said at last. As expected, Sesshomaru did not even stir. "What's the point of going to the old man's estate? Is there something there that can help us or something?"
"The estate has a spell on it that keeps it hidden," Sesshomaru answered mildly. "All of father's contracts are there, as well."
"Oh."
Sesshomaru glanced at him and, without Inuyasha even needing to voice it, added, "He never took your mother there. If you were hoping to find some memory of her, you'll be disappointed."
"I wasn't hoping for anything," Inuyasha defensively said, scowling. His gaze flickered over to Rin and Kohaku again. "But...speaking of my mom..." He trailed off, aware of the danger in treading into this territory of Sesshomaru's life. He did not know Sesshomaru as well as Rin or Jaken, but he knew his temper better than anyone. It had been directed at him enough times to know which sort of things could set it off. Ujihime had learned that the hard way, as well. He had not wanted to involve himself too much in his and Rin's relationship partially because he had witnessed how quickly Sesshomaru's temper rose to the surface in regards to her. It did not take much taunting for one to get a reaction from him.
"Your cowardice is coming out again, Inuyasha," Sesshomaru remarked, turning his head to at last look at him. "If you're going to waste my time, at least make it entertaining."
The urge to punch Sesshomaru came so quickly that Inuyasha had to physically restrain himself by crossing his arms. "You know it's the same, right?" he said in a flat voice, nodding towards Rin. "Her and my mom? What happened today should be proof enough."
Sesshomaru stared at him unblinkingly for a moment before he snorted, looking away again. "Wrong, as usual."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
This time, Inuyasha was not sure that Sesshomaru intended to answer him and he glanced at where he was gazing. Rin and Kohaku had gotten up from the hot spring and were making their way back up the steps to the building. Rin had paused on the bottom step and her head seemed to turn their way for a mere few seconds before she followed Kohaku inside. The night seemed darker and colder without their presence and the mountain seemed now devoid of sound. Steam rose languidly above the pools of water, yet it still seemed so inhospitable. Inuyasha was glad that he did not live in the mountains.
"He gained nothing from being the Lord of the Western Lands," Sesshomaru said after time had passed. He did not sound angry, as Inuyasha had expected, but reflective. "I chose my path. Rin won't die again because of me."
"But how do you know? You can't control what other people do to her."
"Do you plan on living your entire life this way? Lingering on the dead?" Sesshomaru asked him, looking to him with his usual, stoic expression. "Let them remain where they belong – in the past."
"I'm not 'lingering on the dead,'" Inuyasha stated peevishly. "There's some obvious correlations."
"You weren't even born yet. What could you possibly know?"
"I know enough, alright? From what my mom said when I was a kid and Myoga and Totosai – "
"Your mother," he interrupted coolly, "chose to run away than stay with father when she was revived by Tenseiga. She let herself die without setting you up with any way of living, even though she had raised you like a human. Don't compare her pathetic existence to Rin."
"You bastard, don't you talk about her that way!" Inuyasha crouched down, grabbing at the hilt of the Tessaiga.
"Let me remind you, little brother, that it was because of her that our father died from the hands of a common human."
"We both know it was because he was injured by Ryukotsusei! Or is that her fault, too?"
"Yes. There's no room for love as the Lord of the Western Lands," Sesshomaru said plainly. "He knew that and rather than choose one, he tried to hold onto his title and be with a human. It's no problem of mine if you're too obtuse to understand that."
"What did you expect her to do? Talk Takemaru out of killing him? From what I heard, our old man told her to leave with me. The whole building was on fire – she couldn't do anything about that!"
"I expected nothing from that woman." Sesshomaru turned away from him, stepping towards the edge of the building.
"Then what about Rin? What are you expecting from her? To die for you if a building's on fire?"
He cast a disparaging glance over his shoulder, as if the question was too stupid to entertain. "Unlike your mother, Inuyasha, Rin isn't a coward when it comes to those close to her. And I'm not like father – I know what's required of me to keep her safe. Next time, I won't be as tolerant about your comparisons. Be aware of that before you open your mouth."
His warning delivered, Sesshomaru floated down to the ground and swept up the stairs and inside the building. Inuyasha was left alone on the top of the building, still gripping Tessaiga and staring at the top of the steps. Only after a few moments did he slowly straighten, his hand dropping from the hilt of Tessaiga. His anger had drained out of him as fast as it had come, leaving him feeling hollow inside.
Slowly, he lowered himself to a kneeling position on top of the building, hunching his shoulders against the cool breeze that wafted against his back. Sitting alone, he was reminded of Kagome's words when he had first voiced his concerns about Sesshomaru and Rin: "...you can't assume that Rin's going to end up like your mom just because she's with Sesshomaru." He had not wanted to talk about his parents with Kagome and had let the topic die instead. Now he regretted not discussing it with her, feeling that he could have avoided the ugliness that had just transpired between him and Sesshomaru. He had grown accustomed to the lack of civility between them, but something about this had felt deeply personal, as if he had not only insulted Sesshomaru to his face, but had said something incredibly tactless about Rin, too.
Sesshomaru was right. He had just been born when their father died and had only been a child when his mother passed on, too. He did not know anything about their relationship or the world that his father had been living in – he had barely understood his mother's world. His memories of her, while tender, had not always been happy ones. She often cried, he remembered, and had little company outside of him. She had been ostracized in spite of being a noblewoman and when she passed away from an unknown sickness, it had been a quiet affair. After she had died, he had been taken far from the family estate and deposited in the middle of the woods. They had fed him drugged food to get him to sleep so that when he awoke alone, he had no idea where he was or how to get back to the estate.
He had never spoken to anyone about what had happened to him after his mother's death, only Sesshomaru knew what had happened. He had appeared to him days after he had wandered the woods. To this day, he still did not know why Sesshomaru had been there. His knowledge of his brother had only been through Myoga, who would visit occasionally and tell Inuyasha stories about the demon side of his family.
"Who are you?" Inuyasha had asked from where he had been sitting at the river embankment, drinking water.
"So, this is what our father left us for," Sesshomaru had said, smirking humorlessly. "A waste of the Great Dog Demon's bloodline."
"Are you...Sesshomaru? My brother?"
"Unfortunately." Sesshomaru had inspected the area around Inuyasha at that time before saying, "This is your world now, Inuyasha. That woman's no longer here to hold your hand. The next time I see you alive, be prepared to fight your older brother. Otherwise, you will die."
It had been only one of a handful of encounters Inuyasha had with Sesshomaru until he sought him out for the Black Pearl. Each fight with Sesshomaru had been more unpleasant and dangerous than the last, yet strangely enough, he always seemed content with beating him down rather than killing him. Everything he knew about his father, Sesshomaru, and Izayoi had been learned in those moments. He had been too focused on surviving for the first bit of his life to think twice on Sesshomaru or his parents. He had taught himself to tuck away the pains and traumas of childhood into a little corner where they could be temporarily ignored. At some point in his life, he had developed a bitterness towards his father and only through Tessaiga had he been able to resolve that feeling of resentment. He had been angry with him for dying, even though it had been a nonsensical, childish emotion. As a result, he had been jealous of Sesshomaru for knowing him, for having time with him, yet too prideful to ask him questions about their father.
And, even though he knew that, he hated to hear Sesshomaru speak poorly of his mother. Sesshomaru's words had cast doubt onto his perception of her, as little as he liked it. He knew that she had grieved Toga until the day she died and he wondered now if she had felt complicit in his demise. It did not change how much he loved his mother or still grieved for her death, but it raised more questions about his parent's relationship. She had suffered for her association with Toga and when he had died, he had left her alone to deal with the cruel backlash of that choice. He could remember very few people being kind to his mother and even fewer willing to treat him with any common decency or humanity. He could not remember her ever speaking up or attempting to defend either herself or her half-demon son. Instead, she would always quietly steer Inuyasha away and try to make the best out of their situation, playing with him alone or spending days lounging in the garden with him and Myoga for company.
Reflecting back on it, it made more sense why Sesshomaru had been so angry with the comparison.
Rin had a strong sense of her place in Sesshomaru's world. She would defend those against Sesshomaru when she felt strongly about them and had tried to talk sense into Kohaku even when he had been possessed by Naraku. Inuyasha had seen Rin throw herself in harm's way for Sesshomaru and Jaken both enough times to know that she would not leave Sesshomaru's side even if he told her to run. She would get out of the way of battle, but never leave completely. He had witnessed it with Ujihime, still going to Sesshomaru in spite of knowing that he had been the true target. Out of all the women that he had crossed paths with, Rin had showed unfailing loyalty to Sesshomaru where it would have failed most people.
Inuyasha lowered his head against his knees, sighing heavily.
Not for the first time, he wished his father were still alive. Just for once, he would like to hear the story of him and Izayoi from him. Perhaps then he could, as Sesshomaru had said, leave the dead in the past.