21 days since the expedition

As the last rays of sunset faded from the sky, Petra wrapped her arms around her knees. For about half an hour, she'd taken a seat on one of the weighty branches above the level of her hideout, staring into the shadowy haven within the wood. Her fingers played with her upper lip and each breath she took felt like it was being dragged into her. Her heart pulsed in an uneasy rhythm, as her chest constricted.

The fingers on her free hand twitched and moved towards one of her trigger handles. The urge to return into that dark hole was like a newborn flame, rising higher and higher. You'd be safe one night if you went back. The fear within her tried to remind her. You'd have another day to try and form a better plan.

Petra closed her eyes and brought both hands up to cup her face.

No. She'd waited long enough, had more than adequate time to come up with a better solution. Resources and energy were draining from her. She had to try while she was still strong enough. No amount of that unease could really make a persuasive, argument at this stage.

You've got to fight the fear, Petra, her father had taught her years ago. Her and her sisters had learned and re-learned that lesson over and over each time they came upon something that frightened them. Running away won't help you at all. It'll just let your fear grow big enough to catch you. Stand up to it and find out for sure what you can make of it. You might find that the great scary thing about it is just a shadow.

Her sister Jaime had picked up on that lesson well, Petra thought as she rubbed her forehead on the back of her hand. She was so damn fearless. The image of her sister in that dream days ago made Petra shudder with unease, raising her head and rubbing at her eyes. It was frightening how much Petra could imagine Jamie joining the Scouts out of vengeance against the titans if something did happen to Petra. Worst of all, Petra didn't think she could see herself doing anything differently if their roles were reversed. She groaned into the air. I guess we're both just stubborn pains then.

God, she wanted to see Jamie again, and Hannah and Celeste. She wanted to help her mother in the kitchen and laugh at all the ways she scolded Petra for the way she cooked. She wanted to listen to her father's tales about his weird experiences down at the tavern. She wanted to listen to her sisters argue and watch them pinch each other. But to have all of this, to watch it all once more, she had to survive.

A cold whisper of wind brushed against her skin, like a hand pulling her from stillness and into a walk. Petra felt her joints wake up and renewed determination begin to fill up her body. Carefully she rose to her feet and turned away from her safety net. The sunlight was almost entirely gone and the subtle blue of dusk was settling over the sky. The trees began their nightly transformation into shadows in front of her.

Time to go, Petra thought as she stepped off the branch and fired off her hooks.

—

She used only a short burst of gas to propel herself towards the edge of the forest. After that she began to walk at a brisk pace.

The growing shadows teased her already prominent anxiety, as if someone was sprinkling wood shavings over an open fire. But it kept her senses keen. Her eyes darted to any movements, any sounds, any shifts of air around her and her hands gripped the triggers even harder, the material digging into her palms.

More and more open sky began to show itself through the thinning out presence of trees as she walked. The chill of the night air grew with the view. Petra welcomed it as she approached the edge of the trees, drinking in the expansive horizon that stretched out ahead of her. It had been so long since she'd been foraging for supplies around here on that first night, since she had ridden into these woods with her comrades. All of that seemed like it had happened in a different life.

Stepping out of the shadows of the trees and onto the great moonlit plains felt like a weight had slipped off her shoulders. Petra sagged from the absence of it as she walked. She glanced back over her shoulder at the darkening woods and a great thrill of triumph coursed through her.

You're out. You're free. You're on your way home.

Petra returned her attention to the horizon once more, a renewal of motivation filling her at once. She set off at a light jog, loosening her grip on her gear as she did. She was running into the wind but the cool temperature kept her concentration sharp. All of the food she'd finished off earlier had given her more energy than she'd had in a while. As long as she paced herself, she could run for a while.

Her mind thought back to the endurance runs back in training, back when she had first joined Levi Squad. Being criticized for her technique, then praised by the captain for addressing her problematic movements and for improving. A tug moved inside her chest, one of familiarity and nostalgia. I'll be with you soon, Captain. I will.

But she could never be with the others again. Even so, there were still plenty of people back home waiting for her.

—

It was a struggle to judge pacing, Petra found. The need to leave the forest behind and return to the Walls as quickly as she could battled with the fact that she needed to conserve energy because she didn't know how long the journey on foot would take. Even a light jog sapped at her energy levels more than she would like meaning she had to slow to a walk quite often. The food she'd finished off between naps in the day had helped to boost her but still, she wasn't quite at her best.

Once upon a time she could have kept up a moderate jog for a couple of hours (with very minimal pauses) on a really good day, A light jog would have been maintained even longer. She used to be able to power walk for a while as well. Back when she was strong.

She was out of sight of the forest within the first hour and she was met with wide plains, the occasional cluster of abandoned houses and sporadic trees. Now and again she would pass a sprawled out, lethargic titan laid out on the grass or against a house or tree. She considered killing them but quickly dismissed the process as a waste of energy. She couldn't kill every titan that might catch up to her. She had to keep all the energy she could for home.

—

The hours of night passed by faster than the miles. Petra limited her stops to very short periods even if that meant taking the rests more frequently. The landscape was harder to read at night but if she kept moving forward, she'd come across the wall at some point.

The boxes of blades banged relentlessly against her thighs when she ran. She ignored the pain but knew she'd have bruises there tomorrow. Over 20 days of wearing straps all the time wouldn't look so good on her skin either. But these worries were as fleeting as they were thoughts in her head. Now wasn't the time to get lost in her thoughts. Now was the time to put everything into moving forward.

So she ran and ran. Ran as her body ached. Ran as her head throbbed from the exhaustion. Ran as the chill of night deepened and threatened to freeze her insides. She tugged her cloak further around her although the benefit had long been lost. She lowered her mouth and chin behind it.

You can do this. Ilse did it. She evaded titans for at least a day or so before one found her. If you can make it to the Walls, you'll be okay.

—

Dawn soon crept over the horizon, filling the sky with light that sparkled on the dew that clung to leaves and the grass. Petra heard the wet swipe of the grass as she lurched through it, the balance in her exhausted legs giving out over and over. Even as she jogged, fatigue wore at her. She had to fight to keep her eyes open but they continued to fall half-closed every now and again. Her vision blurred in front of her and she kept blinking to clear it, more and more.

The increasing sunlight seemed to chase her, pushing aside any possibilities of sitting down and resting. Every second lost was a second a titan gained in sunlight. Besides, if she stopped, she didn't know if she would be able to get herself going again. If she wasn't destined to make it out of this then she'd rather black out than be conscious when a titan came to eat her. Petra scrubbed at her eyes with the back of her hand, streaking her face with dirt and tired tears as she did.

A particularly slippery patch of grass beneath her feet sent her flying forwards. "Ack-" she grunted as she hit the ground, sliding along, mud and grass sticking to her face. Her mind seemed to roll over itself. Colours and shapes danced in and out of clarity. Her eyes fluttered then tried to close again. Drowsiness swept through her, inviting her down into a dark, sweet oblivion. Do it. Let go. All your troubles will soon be over.

Petra's fingers clenched in the grass and she exhaled, fighting the feeling as the faces of her parents, sisters, the captain, Nifa and her friends floated into her head. Even her former commandant at the Cadet Corps came to mind. Never just lie there and take it. Fight until you can't any more. You never know when a situation can turn.

Raising her head with some difficulty, Petra rubbed her sleeve against her filthy mouth and reached for sturdier ground. She planted her palms down hard and pushed. Protest shot through her whole body as her arms took her weight and lifted her. She brought one knee forward and then another then shifted to one foot and finally the other until she was crouched.

Her joints burned with overuse but at least they were still working, Petra thought as she rose up and began to walk again. Only as she returned her eyes to the horizon properly, blinking away the urge to sleep again, did she freeze up. How had she not noticed that before?

Maybe half a mile ahead of her, the great stone barrier of humanity loomed towards the skies. Petra's heart dropped a great deal of its tension at once. Wall Rose. Her eyes were pricked with what remained of tears but none actually fell. She felt dry and drained and empty. Except for the feeling of hope that now rose up within her.

Home.

Come on now, she told herself as she began to jog again, trying to ignore the punishing sensations on her body with each stride, with each swing of her arms. Just a little further and you've done it. The surprise had jolted a bit of wakefulness and clarity into her and she seized upon both.

The effort of running punched the breath out of her but she threw everything she had into moving forward, to try and make it to that gate. She tried to summon it all into one last burst, her eyes drinking in the welcome sight of the Walls with the tiny patrolling figures along the top and the…

… boulder blocking the gate.

Petra stumbled to a clumsy walk as she scrubbed at her bleary eyes again.

This wasn't Karanes. It was Trost. She'd come a different way.

Even so, it was within the Walls. It was still home.

So she continued to run as quickly as possible. Light rose up behind her, stretching out ahead of her. The titans would be waking up now. She couldn't afford to stop anymore, she realized, fighting against the agony. She needed someone to hear her. She needed to get close enough to the Wall to use her gear and get onto the wall. She could ask for help then.

Her head hammered in protest from her thoughts, the physical exhaustion and the fear that battered away inside it.

Run. Just run.

—

The doors to the lift opened and the 104th gang trotted out of it onto the sturdy stonework of the walls, stretching their arms and staring out at the expanse of wild territory leading into the horizon. A low level of chatter and grumbling began to rise up among them. There was very little appreciation on their part for being pulled into a dawn session supervising and observing Eren's titan form. The ride in the lift had been accompanied by Connie asking why they were all needed for this and Sasha asking when they were next going to eat. Jean had been dozing off against the side and had been thwacked awake by an irritated Levi while Hange had lectured them all on the importance of being part of Eren's training together so they all understood where he was at with his progress.

There was a sadness to getting used to training without Historia among them but she was settling into her new role as Queen. There was a great deal of paperwork still to do and official business to observe before she would take an unsupervised role. But the young woman already had ideas for how things could be improved and she had the support of all the commanders of the military in her plans to do so.

Eren walked towards the edge of the wall, shielding his eyes from the rising sun. "Should I turn now?" he called back to Captain Levi and Hange who were disembarking from the lift. He half-turned towards them, one hand already balling into a fist.

"Not yet." Hange called to him, folding their arms and rubbing their chin thoughtfully.

"Hold your horses, Eren." Levi added.

Eren stiffened but then nodded. "Yes, Squad Leader, Captain."

"We should wait until we see our first titan." Hange told the teenager. "There's no sense in having you wandering around in titan form with nothing to do."

Levi stepped away from Hange and began to walk among his new squad. "However that doesn't mean you can all just stand around, doing nothing. Patrol this area and keep an eye out for titan movement. Report back when you see one." He then fixed his gaze on Eren. "Don't turn until Hange or I tell you."

"Sir." Eren answered loudly enough but Levi could hear the unease that had been sitting in his voice since his capture by Rod Reiss. While Eren's ego had been in need of a little humbling and calming down, what had happened down there had all but completely demoralized him until they#d heard Shadis' story. That, at least, seemed to have given the boy some peace of mind. Levi took a small measure of comfort from that and chased that recognition away. It was just concern for his charge's mental state. That was all. It would be easier all around if Eren wasn't too emotionally imbalanced.

Levi observed as Armin placed a hand on Eren's shoulder and led the scruffy haired boy away with him and Mikasa. At least his friends would keep an eye on him and keep him in line somewhat. That would make Levi's job a lot easier. The fact that Mikasa was also an Ackerman played a significant role in his reassurance.

"He's still not quite right. is he?" Hange asked as they joined Levi at the edge of the wall, their gaze falling on Eren as well. They let out a sigh that was too quiet for them but Levi heard it with his proximity. He watched their eyes soften sadly as they watched Eren. "I'd hoped that Shadis' story would have helped him a bit more."

"The kid's not had much time to deal with any of this shit," Levi grumbled. "Guess we should be glad he's at least keeping some of his shit together."

"Even so, I wonder how long that can last," Hange's tone was unusually hard. "If he falls apart when it comes to the Wall Maria mission-"

"I won't let that happen, Hange." Levi interrupted, his focus still on the retreating back of the boy in question. "I'll have it out with him one way or the other."

Hange's face shifted into a smile. "My, that sounded almost paternal, Levi."

"Did you forget that the brass put me in charge of the brat as part of our custody of him?" Levi retorted irritably. "Unlike some I take my job seriously."

"Sure, that's all it is, suuuuureeee," Hange cackled quietly, ignoring his bait, and moved to take a better look at the horizon. They withdrew a small set of binoculars from their pocket and raised them to their eyes with a sad huff. "I hope some titans come along soon." They spoke the wish with such reverence. "It's a shame that we have to kill them. I miss my experiments," they add. "Annie's not around to ruin them this time."

Levi turned and began to pace along the wall in short lengths. "You and your titan obsession can wait, Four-Eyes."

"As it often has to," Hange sighed dramatically and continued to watch the landscape for signs of titan movement. "Nothing," they observed with an annoyed huff. "Not even a-" Suddenly they stopped talking, their shoulders squaring, their head leaning forward, mouth twisting in confusion.

"Spotted one of your pets?" Levi sneered.

Hange lowered their binoculars and then raised them again. "No," they answered quietly. "I thought I saw but…" Their frown deepens. "No, there- there it is again. That's got to be a trick of the light. It can't be. That's not- there's no way…"

Levi began to advance on the Squad Leader. "There what is? For fuck's sake, speak sense, Shitty Glasses."

Hange lowered the binoculars again, looking sideways at Levi as he reached them. "Look over there." They tell him as they hand the binoculars over. "Tell me you see her too," they add, raising their arm to point in the specific direction.

"See who?" Levi took the binoculars, gave them a wipe with a handkerchief and put them to his eyes. Following Hange's arm, he landed the binoculars focus on the spot they were pointing at. Levi's own body went still with disbelief as he endeavoured to process what he was seeing.

Running along the worn down road that had been created by the Survey Corps over four years of expeditions was a soldier - by her uniform, a Scout - covered in grass and mud. Although her strides were quick, they were also clumsy and unsteady. Every so often the woman seemed to be on the verge of toppling over but managed to just about catch herself. Levi's breath was stolen from him as her growing proximity gave him a better look at her, a better confirmation of just who he was looking at. The way the light set her ginger hair aflame, the way he could glimpse her rounded face whenever she lifted it to look at the Wall. How can she be here?

Petra

Something loosened in his chest, a feeling that Levi was completely unaccustomed to because fate had never given him anyone back before. Everyone who had disappeared on him had never come back except for Kenny and even then he wasn't someone that Levi had wanted to come back. Yet here was Petra now and the strangeness of that reality took him out of his senses for a moment. Lightness sprung up and the corners of his mouth twitched up for a moment. That pain in his chest, the one he'd learned to live with ever since the conversation with her parents, ever since he'd filled out her death certificate, returned and then faded all at once, leaving him with a bizarre tingling feeling. Like he was stepping out of a dream.

He snapped back to reality, lowering his binoculars. "How can she be out there?" he asked Hange.

"Her body was never found." Hange mused. "But even so, she's been around titans for so long. How has she avoided them?" Already Levi could see the cogs turning behind Hange's glasses. "This is unprecedented. No one has survived outside the Walls for this long."

Levi handed them the binoculars. "We're about to find out how, I guess." He walked towards the edge of the Walls.

"TITAN!" Connie roared from the left just as a rumbling sound accompanied his words.

Levi's hands were at his gear handles, his teeth gritted. "Shit." His attention snapped back to Petra who was still running. Why hadn't she engaged her gear yet? She was in range now. But instead she was headed straight for the blocked hole in the wall.

Sure enough, from the right, a titan came lumbering into focus, making a beeline for the human hurrying into its path. The creature had messy sandy hair and huge watery eyes, as if it was a harmless beast. Both its arms outstretched towards Petra as it ran towards her. Levi's blood turned to ice inside him.

"EREN!" Levi shouted. "Engage that thing now!" He pointed towards the titan as he cried out. He leaped off the wall, sending his hooks into the stone as he descended to the ground sharply. He heard Eren give an answering cry as he plummeted. Seconds later, a golden light filled up the air and Eren's titan roar followed after it.

The ground rumbled as both Levi and Eren landed. Levi spared one look towards Eren as he rushed at the titan which had stopped to watch the light of the transformation. It bought Eren time to reach it. The dark haired titan crashed into the pure titan and they both went sprawling across the ground.

Levi's attention returned to Petra and his heart flew into his mouth. She lay flat on the floor, hand outstretched with drooping eyes, her body stilling before him. He began to sprint. His heart slammed in his ribcage, pumping a variety of emotions throughout his body: desperation, relief and frustration among them.

—

The Wall was so close now, Petra could have laughed with joy if she had the energy. Instead, it was taking everything just to keep moving and not black out.

Her fingers grasped at the triggers of her gear but they kept sliding off them, her grip fading away almost instantly each time she tried to get a good hold of them. Concern rose up and quickly began to transform into panic with each failed attempt.

Why? She wanted to yell at her fingers. Why are you failing now?

She was almost at the Wall. She was close enough to engage, she was sure. The world was blurring a little now and her thoughts faded in and out of cohesion. Her fingers just grabbed clumsily at the triggers, sometimes missing and touching her cloak instead.

Come on. Come on.

Her fingers, also heavily dripping with sweat, just slid off the handles once again.

Petra gasped out a weak, broken sob as she stumbled forward.

Something pounded in the distance. Regular beats like giant footsteps. Petra turned her head sluggishly, horror slow to crawl on her face as comprehension crept in.

I'm dead. I failed. The realization hit Petra like the fall from a horse. It rattled through her and stole the breath from her lungs. She willed herself to change course or to stop but nothing happened. Her legs kept moving, kept carrying her forward but why, she didn't know. What was the point? She wondered as she raced ahead. The titan's path was about to cross hers and then it would be over.

A shout cut through the air but Petra's brain was too panicked to make sense of it. However a familiar golden light filling the air behind the titan caught her eye.

Her legs finally caught onto the danger and stumbled, forcing her to slow to a stop. She tripped and hit the ground again with a thud, eyes still on the light.

The fall should have made her an easy meal but the titan had stopped too, diverted by the explosion of sound and light near it.

That would have been Petra's cue to keep moving but all of her strength had abandoned her. She lay limply on the ground, struggling to even regulate her breathing, her eyelids drooping heavily as she watched her predator's diversion. The aches in her bones and joints returned at once, overwhelming her with discomfort and pain, mingled with a rush of relief that she'd stopped moving at last.

I tried… she thought as she battled to stay awake.

She thought she heard other sounds against the ground. Perhaps more titans were coming from far away. She sighed into the grass. Guess it didn't matter now.

She kept her eyes on the titan that was staring at the distraction. In a moment, a familiar-looking titan raced out of the light and charged her would-be killer, bringing them both to the floor with a crash that sent shockwaves rattling through her. She saw the long dark hair and the luminescent emerald eyes of the saviour titan.

Eren… so he's okay.

Her eyes began to droop shut again and her hand, reaching out, lays flat on the floor, her body finally giving up.

"Petra!" A voice reaches her, deeper and more piercing than any she'd heard in the forest. A voice so distinctive, so heart-provoking, that it was enough to make her lids lift open as a blurry figure in green and brown appeared next to her. Her heart throbbed in aching recognition and her throat released a tiny cry as she tried to respond. She tilted her head so she could see up into the narrow eyes and dark bangs of a familiar face. The sunlight lent his pale complexion a cozy, warm glow.

She exhaled shakily. "Captain," she breathed. At least I get to see him one more time. "Thanks for finding me," she managed to rasp before her eyes fluttered shut. "I can't… I'm sorry…" she breathed.

"Hey," Levi shook her shoulder. "stay awake, Petra. I'm gonna get you out of here."

"Can't… can't use my gear," Petra murmured, her eyes still closed. In the background, she could hear Eren's titan roaring and ripping his opponent apart. But that sound was growing steadily quieter as blackness crept in on the edge of her vision. "My hands won't work."

"Doesn't matter," Levi told her, giving her shoulder another squeeze. "I'll take you." His hands began to unfasten her blade boxes and he shoved them aside immediately. Petra groaned softly at the absence of their weight against her. "Just stay awake."

"Mmm, can't. Too tired, Captain."

"You can sleep soon. Just keep talking to me," he murmured, tucking her into a sitting position, leaning her side into his sturdy frame. "Put your arms around me," he instructed, one hand rubbing her back as the other moved to hold her elbow.

Petra's arms moved of their own accord, instinctively crawling up and around his neck.

There was a whoosh of cable movements and another finger dropped into Petra's line of, admittedly blurry sight. Someone with dark hair.

"Tie her wrists together," Levi said to the figure. "She won't be able to hang on on her own."

"Yes sir," a young, female voice sounded. Petra thought she recognized the stoic tone of Eren's friend Mikasa. Petra felt small, sturdy hands binding her wrists together behind Levi's neck. "Do you want me to help carry her?"

"No, I can manage," Levi's tone was firm. "Keep an eye on Eren with Hange. Keep watch for any more titans."

"Of course, sir. I can take some out if many come."

"Don't engage unless you have to. This is Eren's training session, not ours."

"Sir."

"Take her blades back, if you can manage them," Levi added.

Petra heard Mikasa grabbing at the boxes and examining the blades. "There's only two left. I'll take them." Next came the sound of two metallic slides and the rush of cables being fired again.

Petra slumped against the captain's chest with a small groan. Her eyes had well and truly closed now.

"Almost there, Petra." Levi assured her before a couple of shouts from far above had him cursing. From behind them, some thundering footsteps sounded. Petra felt one of Levi's hands on the back of her head while the other instantly covered one of her ears. "Eren! Incoming!" he shouted away from her.

An answering cry from the direction of Eren's titan was quickly followed by rumbling footsteps.

Levi stood up, pulling Petra against him like a limp doll. She weakly cried out at the movement. Levi's hands, now in fists around his triggers, pressed against her back to hold her steady. Petra's face leaned into the warmth of his neck, her cheek on his shoulder. She was too tired to worry about how filthy she was making him right now.

In a second there was another whoosh of cables and they lifted off from the ground. Petra felt her stomach jolt uncomfortably as she and Levi rushed through the air.

"Urgh," Petra mumbled against him.

The feeling lasted mere seconds as Levi landed them onto firm stone. The impact of it had Petra's feet knock into the floor and her body sagged even more. Her linked wrists and Levi's hands kept her from falling to the ground. Her eyes opened and she lifted her head in a daze.

"Let's get her laid down," Petra recognized Hange's voice though it sounded garbled as though Petra was hearing it from beneath the surface of water.

Blurry green figures moved about her. Her wrists were unlinked and she felt Levi's hands on her back, lowering her to the ground. She felt something soft beneath her and a slow smile crossed her face at the feel of it.

"Wanna sleep now," she whispered.

"Not yet." Levi was kneeling next to her. "Stay with us a bit longer. We're going to get you to the hospital." His words faded away to silence.

Petra could only smile at him as darkness clouded over her and consciousness was finally taken away.