Chapter Seventeen: Confessions

I am an idiot.

Katsuki sat on the floor in his dorm room, head buried in his palms and fingers kneading his scalp in irritation. Why had he done that? He'd lured Aisla out into the forest in the dark and then whined like a baby about his poor, sad life. She probably pitied him so hard, and definitely thought he was pathetic now. She probably didn't even want to talk to him anymore after his cry session. Maybe she'd be too embarrassed to even be seen with him. When would she start avoiding him? Today? Next week?

"What can I do?" she'd asked him.

"Everything," he'd responded. "Please, it has to be you."

How humiliating. No wonder he hadn't seen her all day. She was definitely avoiding him. Well, it wasn't exactly a surprise. He knew her friendship had been too much to hope for from the beginning.

But that kiss…

The one they shared in the rain last night. Water had dripped from her eyelids and mixed with her saliva as their mouths opened. He barely even noticed the rain, however. He'd been too focused on Aisla and how much he'd been craving the taste of her kiss since that first day in the clearing. He hated to admit it, but he was starting to really like this girl.

He shook the thought from his mind and pulled his phone out of his pocket. He typed out a quick text and hit send before he lost the nerve.

"Meet me at the gazebo at noon. I want to talk."

That sounded reasonable enough. Quick and to the point. He didn't need to waste time on pointless small talk.

After a few moments, she responded.

"Okay. I'll bring lunch."

"'Lunch,'" he scoffed aloud. "Does she think this is a date or something?" Then, it occurred to him that maybe she did think he was asking her on a date. If that was the case, what was he supposed to do about it? He'd already disappointed her once by inviting her out and then accidentally standing her up. If he screwed up again, he wasn't sure she'd be as forgiving as the first time.

What the hell should I do, though? he wondered, annoyed at himself for getting into this situation. Aisla was such a complicated girl. He never knew what she was thinking, and even when he thought he did, it always turned out to be the wrong thing!

When they first met, he thought she was just a boring, two-bit extra like the other girls in his class. Then, he found out that her quirk wasn't just defensive, but honestly more badass than some of their other classmates—at least cooler than the invisible chick, tail guy, and the bug-whisperer. After accepting that she had some hero potential and going out of his way to train with her,he spent the better part of a month denying they had any sort of friendship at all. It wasn't personal, or…maybe it kind of was—but the prospect of being friends with a girl—especially this girl—had been too much of a pain to process.

That changed, too, when they started hanging out more and he learned that maybe having Aisla as a friend wasn't so bad after all. Now? He knew, even without experience in the matter, that he and Aisla were more than just friends. He hated to admit to it and he'd never do so aloud, but he knew they'd surpassed some kind of unspoken boundary that divided friendship from…well more than friendship. . Kissing in the forest wasn't exactly something normal "friends" did.

Then there was the "date" thing, the one he'd invited her on a few weeks ago. He'd been summoned by his asshole great-grandfather and was forced to endure the world's worst interrogation in which Grandpa Fartface all but decided his future. Aisla had waited for him for over an hour. Once he'd finally spoken with her later that evening—hours after they were supposed to meet—she was already upset with him. He didn't blame her, even if he kept telling himself that he hadn't officially dubbed their meeting a "date."

Katsuki Bakugo was an idiot.

What did Aisla Haru consider to be a "date….?" Was it just any encounter he invited her to? Or was it just the ones that involved food? If that was the case, she'd been the one who technically invited him on a date because she offered to bring the food, not him. He'd said nothing about lunch. He simply wanted to talk.

Which is exactly what you said the last time, he reminded himself. That was true, but he'd also asked to meet with her at a restaurant off-campus, alone. That wasn't something he did with his buddies. He'd sooner swallow nails than invite Deku to a café to talk. It was too intimate, too…romantic. With Aisla, it was obviously a date, right?

Forget wondering what Aisla considered a "date," Katsuki didn't even know what he considered a date. This was exactly what he meant when he thought girls were complicated. Friendships, relationships, technicalities, boundaries, social expectations were a hassle, a complete waste of time, and yet…

"I heard your little girlfriend went on a date with Todoroki the other day."

He scowled at the memory. Mineta had been the one to inform him of Aisla and Icy Hot's impromptu meeting off-campus. No one knew what they'd been doing, only that they'd gone off together for nearly two hours. He'd seen them later that day in the woods but they hadn't filled him in on their private adventure. Katsuki had been too embarrassed and maybe a little angry to call her out on it. It wasn't like he had any right to. At that point, he hadn't given her any indication that he wanted to be with her. But Todo? He was so obvious, people on the moon could probably see his intentions shining like a damn beacon.

If anyone should be brain dead and clueless about dating, it should have been Todoroki. There was no way he was better at taking a girl out on a date than Katsuki was. The loser was too literal to be suave and as clueless as a blind detective. If Aisla was going to go on dates with anyone, it needed to be Katsuki.

"Well, hell," he grumbled aloud. "Now I have to show up that damn icy hot freak!"

Not that he'd made his decision solely based on jealousy. Aisla was so different from any of the other girls he knew. There was something about her that appealed to him. Something that caught his attention and ensnared his thoughts.

"I shouldn't even bother," he told his reflection as he combed out his hair. The tangles were horrendous today and picking them out was just making him angry. He growled and threw the comb at the mirror. It bounced off and hit him in the forehead.

"Dammit!" he growled, rubbing the spot where he'd been struck. If that thing left a mark, he'd never live down the embarrassment. He'd have to make up some badass story about how he got into a fight with a villain or something.

After a quick brush of his teeth, he grabbed some shoes and headed out of the room. Unfortunately, someone else was coming his way just as he shut the door, and he had no time to turn back around and pretend not to exist. He scowled at the person and decided it was better to just stand there and wait rather than make a run for it.

The intruder advanced slowly as if he had all the time in the world, making Katsuki's agitation grow with each step.

"What do you want?" he finally snapped.

The intruder shrugged. "I was heading back to my room and thought I'd see if you were still up here."

Katsuki scowled. "Why the hell would you want to know that?"

"I heard you're meeting Aisla this afternoon."

Katsuki gritted his teeth in anger. "That's none of your damn business, Icy Hot!"

Dual-colored eyes flashed with some emotion. Anger? Jealousy? "As her best friend, I believe that it is. At least, it will be if you disappoint her and she comes crying to me later."

Oh, I get it, he's in one of his arrogant moods.

"SHUT THE HELL UP, WHO SAID I'M GONNA DO THAT?!"

Todoroki met his glare with one of his own. "Just don't disappoint her again, Bakugo," he warned. "If you don't like her, then you should just let her know because she's under the impression that you do. For whatever reason, Aisla likes you a lot, so stop screwing around with her feelings and just be straight with her." He turned around and headed back down the stairs without waiting for a response.

Katsuki watched him leave, slack-jawed. It wasn't like it was some secret that Aisla had feelings for him, but the fact that her loyal labrador had to come barking up Katsuki's tree meant that she still had her doubts. He thought he'd cleared those up the other night. He'd opened up to her about his grandfather and asked for her help. He felt like a damn fool for allowing himself to act like such a girl, but he'd wanted—no, needed—her to know that he was serious. Why would she tell Icy Hot that she was worried he might not show up today? He felt guilty for even thinking she would trust him. Then he felt guilty for thinking that, too, because the only reason she couldn't trust him was because of him.

"Dammit," he cursed under his breath. He needed to come up with a plan, one that would earn Aisla's trust once and for all. He didn't know why it bothered him so much, but he somehow knew he'd feel better if she no longer doubted his intentions.

Do you, though? he asked himself. Are you sure of your own intentions with her?

"Yes," he decided aloud. "I am."

A few hours later, Katsuki sat in the gazebo he'd summoned Aisla to a few days before. This time, however, it was bright and sunny and the air was warm. He'd been waiting there for half an hour already because he wanted to prove Todo wrong. He wouldn't disappoint Aisla again.

A few minutes later, he heard the soft footsteps signaling her approach. He listened to the sound of her setting something down on the ground next to them and then felt her settle in beside him.

"Hi," she greeted in that sugary sweet tone of hers.

He turned and found a soft smile on her lips. He almost smiled back.

"You're here," he stated dumbly.

She giggled. "I said I would be." She poked his cheek. He pouted in response, which only made her laugh once more. "What did you want to talk about? Is everything alright?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" he asked defensively. Why did she think something was wrong? What gave her that impression? Was it so hard to believe he just wanted to spend time with her?

She shrugged and folded her hands in her lap. "I don't know. You don't usually ask me to meet you at places like this."

Oh. That was the problem. It really was hard for her to believe he wanted to spend time with her. After all, he usually only gave her the time of day when he wanted to train together. He still hadn't made it up to her for standing her up a few weeks ago, either.

You're such a scumbag, he thought in irritation. No wonder she wanted to hang out with and go on dates with Todo instead. At least he made an effort to do things with her outside of school.

"Sorry…" he muttered under his breath.

"What was that?"

"NOTHING, DAMMIT!" he snapped at her, too embarrassed to repeat the apology. Already, his cheeks were hot and his palms were sweating.

"Okay," she agreed easily. "Do you want to talk while we eat? I brought food." She turned around and reached for a small blue bag. She pulled out two bento boxes and offered one to him. "I hope you're okay with what I made. I wasn't sure what you liked."

He took the proffered box and put it in his lap. For once, he was speechless. No one had ever made food for him before. Hell, his own mother made him put together lunches on his own from the time he was in preschool. He wasn't sure what this gesture meant coming from Aisla. Did she think that making him a bento meant they were…dating?

He didn't know what that word meant anymore. He liked spending time with her, and it wasn't horrible when they…did other things (he definitely wasn't thinking about kissing right now), but was that enough? He wasn't very nice to her, and if what Todoroki said was true, then she did have moments where she was upset enough to cry because of him. She didn't go to Katsuki in those instances; she sought out someone who would actually be there for her. Sure, they were on a "date" thing right now, but did Aisla consider this thing between them exclusive? Did she think of him as her…boyfriend?

He sighed and opened the box, ignoring the weight of her stare on the side of his head. He could feel her eyes boring right into his skull, reading his thoughts and trying to decide what to say in response to whatever she heard there. He didn't blame her. He wouldn't know what to say to him either.

He started eating just for the excuse not to talk to her. He was too embarrassed and ashamed and angry with himself to muster up much of a conversation. She probably hated that part the most about him, how he could go long periods of time without saying a single word to her. Sometimes the silence was unbearable and even Katsuki couldn't stand it. He didn't know what it must be like for her—this bright, sunny girl who always tried to be optimistic even in the worst of times, to be stuck with someone whose personality was akin to a storm cloud.

"It's such a nice day," she commented. "I really like spending time with you, Katsuki. Sometimes it's nice to just sit in silence with someone you like."

He scowled. He hated when she did that.

Stop prying into my mind, he silently scolded her.

Irritation made him bite a piece of cucumber a little too sharply, causing him to chew right through his own cheek.

"OW! DAMMIT!" He clamped a hand over the offended cheek.

Aisla leaned over and placed a hand over his, reflective blue eyes full of concern. "What happened?"

He stared into her gaze for much longer than necessary, trying to remember why he'd sworn in the first place. Then his cheek throbbed in tandem with his beating heart. "Nothing, I bit my cheek," he answered through a mouthful of food. He swallowed roughly even though he hadn't really finished chewing.

Aisla rolled her eyes when he started choking and reached over to grab a water bottle. She popped the lid and placed the straw against his lips. He took a long chug before he realized that this was her water bottle, the red one with the cat paw prints on the side that she carried around everywhere. The one she'd had her own lips on.

He pulled back and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

"Better?" she asked, still holding the bottle between them as if waiting for him to take it.

He nodded and cleared his throat. "Of course, I am," he mumbled. He closed the bento and set it on the ground between them.

"Good. I thought it would be difficult to drag you all the way back to Recovery Girl if you passed out from choking," she said dryly.

For a moment, he wasn't sure if she was joking or not. One look at her twinkling eyes said she most definitely was, which only made his own narrow. She responded with a wink.

He scoffed.

"You're a funny guy," she mused.

"Yeah, whatever." He stood to his feet and stretched his arms over his head. Aisla followed suit a moment later and packed up their bentos. She placed the bag on one of the benches, then stood there expectantly.

"What?" He didn't mean to snap at her and felt a little bad when her eyes lost some of their light.

"I thought you wanted to talk or something," she reminded him.

Oh yeah, I guess I did say that, he thought. But then they hung out and spent time together and it was like a date, so there was nothing for him to say. The best thing to do right now would be to tell her he had fun and that they should do it again sometime. Yep, that was the kind of behavior that made him a better dating candidate than her "best friend." Except, now he was thinking about the aforementioned bastard, and even though he meant to tell her he had a nice time and that her hair was especially blonde today, instead he blurted, "You were with Todoroki."

Her eyes registered surprise but she looked more curious than anything else. "I was," she answered slowly. "We had breakfast this morning. Was that what you wanted to talk to me about?"

No, he thought in irritation, because he couldn't stop the words from spilling out of his mouth. When he was with her, he said all sorts of stupid things he wished he could take back. The thought of her doing stuff with Todoroki made him feel gross inside and he still didn't want to acknowledge the reason why.

"Is that all?" he pressed. He didn't know where the sudden anger had come from, but he felt his fists clenching as they spoke.

Aisla must have noticed it, too. Her eyes glanced down at his hands then back up again. "Of course," she replied. "What else would there be?"

Nothing, he thought. There would be nothing. I'm being irrational, sorry I said anything. By the way, I like that ribbon in your hair and your blue eyes and I really want to hold your hand again. That was what he should have said, but again his stupid mouth blasted off with the intensity of his explosions and he loudly declared, "I don't want you two kissing!"

There. He said it.

Wait. Why had he said it?! What was he thinking?! He was such a damn fool. She was going to hit him now for sure.

He braced himself, feeling his cheeks grow impossibly hotter by the second.

Aisla's face was unreadable. She studied him unblinkingly for a long moment without saying anything. He was about to take the words back and tell her he was only joking when she finally let out a soft sigh.

"Katsuki, what makes you think Todoroki and I would be kissing?" she finally asked him. "And moreover…why would it matter if we were?" Her words were soft and her eyes gentle. She wasn't trying to make a biting remark, she was genuinely asking him. That brought him up short. He opened his mouth to speak but wasn't able to come up with a reasonable response. Why did he care if she was making out with Icy Hot? Why did it bother him so much?

"I don't know," he admitted quietly. "I just hate thinking that you might be."

Aisla took a step forward and took one of his hands in hers. Her crystal eyes focused on his. "Katsuki," she whispered, "I've never kissed Todoroki. He's my friend. There's nothing more between us." Her hand squeezed his and her eyes shone with sincerity. "I promise. The only person I want to kiss…is you, Katsuki."

Before he could overthink the situation, he leaned down and captured her lips with his own. Her free hand pressed against his chest and for a moment he thought she might push him away. Instead, she clutched his shirt with her fingers and let out a shaky sigh into his mouth.

He slid a hand behind her back and pulled her closer as their kiss deepened. She was so warm, like the afternoon sun in the middle of summer. He liked the way she felt in his arms more than he wanted to admit. He felt himself wanting more, to envelop himself in her sun and let it burn him alive until there was nothing left but a pile of ash.

"Aisla," he breathed into her mouth. He traced the shape of her lips with his tongue, causing a shudder to run down her spine. He was just about to slip his tongue inside when—

"What…hell?"

Katsuki and Aisla jumped apart.

Katsuki swore under his breath and aimed a punch at the intruder. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" he roared.

The dead man ducked just in time to avoid Katsuki's fist, face registering shock and a little bit of anger. Honestly, it would have been an impressive feat if Katsuki hadn't been so humiliated. The guy was disgustingly tall and had to practically bend in half to avoid Katsuki's fist. He was probably used to having fists aimed at his face and found it instinctual to move out of the way.

He was some kid Katsuki swore he'd never seen before. All gangly with dark blue hair that hung in front of his face with one sharp yellow eye peeking from behind the strands of blue. His pale skin and creepy stature reminded Katsuki of some kind of gargoyle. What the hell kind of stalkerish ghost-kid would be spying on a couple in the forest anyway? If he saw that kiss, Katsuki was going to blast his skull off his body.

Aisla caught him around the waist from behind, effectively stopping any further attacks. "Let's not and say we did, Katsuki," she suggested as she struggled to hold him back. "I'm sorry!" she pleaded with the stranger. "We didn't mean to intrude. Are you the one who takes care of the flowers here?"

Katsuki couldn't give two shits about flowers or playing nice. He was more concerned with forest voyeurs coming in and ruining his dates. "I'LL KILL YOU FOR WHAT YOU JUST SAW!" he raged.

The gargoyle sighed and pushed back his dark blue hair. "This…is mine," he mumbled.

"What did he say?" Aisla asked.

"I think he said he's a DEAD MAN!" Katsuki pulled against Aisla's hold but he didn't put too much effort into the action. He was aware enough in that moment to realize that hurting her was a probability.

The other guy scoffed. "I'm not…this place…" He gestured at the gazebo and the vines dangling from its roof. Then, he groaned as if the very words themselves were painful. "Just leave," he finally got out.

Aisla finally released her hold on Katsuki's torso and came to stand beside him. She offered the weirdo a sweet look. "Look…whoever you are, we weren't trying to bother anyone. We were just having a little picnic. See?" She gestured at their discarded bento boxes.

He narrowed his eyes. "Didn't look like eating… Soiling my sacred grounds… doing it in front of the flowers…"

Katuski seethed. "LOOK YOU FUCKING WEIRDO, WE WERE JUST LEAVING! SO SHUT THE HELL UP ABOUT WHAT WE WERE OR WERE NOT DOING, YOU GOT THAT?!"

He shrugged in response and said something Katsuki couldn't hear.

"Whatever," Katsuki muttered. He grabbed the bento boxes and stormed off in the opposite direction. "Fucking weirdo," he grumbled as he walked.

Aisla hurried to catch up, water sloshing in her bottle as she ran. "I think that was another first-year," she observed. "I'm pretty sure I saw him with the business course students before. His name is… Fujiwami? No…Fujishi… Hm." She shook her head and sent him a sly smile. "Well, at least that was an entertaining afternoon."

Katsuki didn't know why, but something about that made him suddenly burst out laughing. "That was fucking shitty, you mean!" he argued, though his anger was evaporating by the second. She had that effect on him.

After a moment, she joined in with a tinkling laugh of her own. "You're right, but at least the curry was good!"

"Yeah, you're not a terrible cook."

She gave him an affronted expression. "Excuse you, Mr. Doom-and-Gloom, but my cooking happens to be top-notch." She kissed her own fingers then winked at him.

He chuckled. "You're so weird."

"You like it!" she rebutted with a wide smile.

He thought about that. Did he like this weird, chipper side of her? Or did he prefer when she was more serious? Maybe he liked when she just smiled softly at him and fluttered her eyelashes in that way that paralyzed him?

All of that, he decided. He liked everything about this strange girl. He didn't know why, but it was getting harder and harder to deny the feelings he had for her.

That didn't mean he was going to tell her that, though…

"Maybe," he agreed with an eye roll.

A small hand slipped into his without permission as they walked. He glanced down in surprise as if unsure how it got there. Aisla's dainty fingers gripped his firmly. Her eyes shone with something he couldn't describe.

"Aisla," he started.

She put a finger to her lips. "Shh. Just let it be, Katsuki. No one is going to care if we hold hands." She looked away for a moment and bit her lip as if trying to decide what to say next. Or maybe she was trying to decide if she was going to say anything at all.

"You can talk to me, you know…" he offered in his best attempt at a gentle tone.

She looked back up at him with surprise in her eyes. "I know that, Katsuki." She sounded almost sincere, but there was still that small, barely noticeable doubt in her words, the one Icy Hot had hinted at this morning.

"Do you?" he pressed. "You don't, you know…" he looked away and cleared his throat, "talk. To me, that is. Is it that hard for you? Am I…I don't know, mean or something?"

God, my face feels so hot. I feel like such a girl right now.

"Of course not!" she assured him, giving his hand a squeeze. "I don't think you're mean at all. I like the way you are. I've never met anyone like you before, Katsuki. You're funny, brave, you always help out your friends, you're really smart, too! And I like how sweet you can be when you don't even try."

He scoffed at that last part. "Sweet. I don't think that's the right word to describe me."

She gave a half shrug. "It is, though. You can be really sweet, Katsuki, even if it's by accident." She winked with this. "But I also like how strong and determined you are. I also really like that no matter what happens to you and no matter what anyone says, you stay true to who you are. You don't try to change yourself to fit society's mold. You're just Katsuki Bakugo and that's good enough for you. That's good enough for me, too."

"You stupid idiot," he said fondly, laughing softly as he shook his head in amazement. Someone really thought of him in such positive ways? He never thought that was possible. Kirishima and Kaminari thought he was a bro and liked hanging out with him because he was tough and smarter than them. His parents were forced to love him because of blood or some bullshit. Deku thought they were best friends, but that nerd definitely didn't count. But Aisla…she genuinely thought he was a good person.

"Do you think of me…as a friend?" she asked him, voice barely audible. She was avoiding eye contact again, which made him wonder what she was trying to hide in her expression.

He thought about her question for a moment. Why would she feel the need to ask him that? Obviously, he thought of her as a friend.

"We're more than that…"

He inwardly cringed at his own words. He kept forgetting what a total freak he'd been the other night. He understood, though. She didn't want to know if he thought of her as a friend, she wanted to know if that was as far as his feelings went. Did his affection go beyond friendly appreciation?

"We're together…" Maybe those words hadn't been enough for her. She still had her doubts. Because of the things he said? Or were his actions to blame this time?

"I don't kiss my friends…" he mumbled, feeling his cheeks turn hot again.

"What was that?"

"I SAID I DON'T KISS MY DAMN FRIENDS, OKAY?!" he shouted. "ARE YOU HAPPY?!"

She smiled warmly and nodded. "Yes. I'll accept that answer. For now."

He gaped at her. "For now?! Don't you dare expect me to express my undying love like some bachelor on a stupid dating simulator!" He'd seen one or two of those on her phone before and heard the girls fawning over their favorite anime crushes or whatever—not that he ever listened to that kind of girl talk.

She giggled. "Of course not. I would never expect you to be so open like Zen or Jumin. Oh Seven, too."

He stared unblinkingly at her.

She laughed outright. "Your face is so cute when you get confused!" She poked his cheek before he had a chance to come back to reality.

He pouted and brushed her off. "Shut up! I'm not confused! Or cute!"

"Okay," she agreed. "Want to go train for a bit before we go back? I bet I can knock you out before you even have the chance to say 'uncle'~"

His eyes lit up at the challenge. "Oh, you are so on!"

A/N: Happy Friday! I hope everyone had a wonderful week, once again! For those of you who celebrate, I hope Thanksgiving was a nice time spent with your families. As for Katsuki and Aisla, they won't be celebrating that particular holiday, for obvious reasons. However, I do have some other fun holiday chapters in store for you all that I hope you'll enjoy!

Reviews:

MeMyselfAndI82907: Of course! I try to respond to every review. It's something I started when I was publishing chapters for another story of mine and everyone seemed to really like it. I love talking with you guys and sharing our thoughts with one another, so feel free to chat away! Theories and opinions are always fun to hear, if you have any! Have a splendid day!