DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Naruto universe but I do have an imagination of my own.

Thinking

Emphasis

Biju, etc. speaking

Biju, etc. thinking

Kurama and his siblings had lived since the days of their father, the Sage of Six Paths. They had been bound to their father when he was the ten tails jinchuuriki, then they had all been absolutely free. After that, of course, men came and enslaved them, wanting their power to harness for their own wicked purposes, chaining them, and attempting to put them into servitude. Kurama had eventually hated mankind, his hatred growing over every generation. They were so different from his father! Each cared only for his or her own narrow goals. Rarely did he ever see flesh bags who attempted to look forward to seeing what their actions could mean for the future.

Oh no!

Even though he had listened carefully to his old man when he told him and his siblings that one day there would be someone who would treat them like he did, he no longer believed it. Then came Naruto. No matter what, the girl (who was pretending to be a boy because her village was so unsafe for her,) had a ludicrously different outlook on life. Even the brat's mother was jaded in comparison, although with the destruction of her village, maybe that was understandable - although Kurama did not think so back then. He had hated the red-head who kept him chained and had stakes driven through his great tails. Who wouldn't have hated that? Whether it was her fault the seal kept him pinned that way or not, it was painful and it sucked!

Still, he remembered when he felt a sense of deja-vu and wondered what was going on. It began when he realized the red-head had a fetus growing within her. His first thought was, "How can I kill this thing," naturally. But then he sensed it: Asura. What in the world was his father's child's chakra doing here, inside his red-headed crazy vessel's future child? He decided to wait and watch because he felt that something unusual was going to happen, and sure enough, something did happen but not in any of the ways he anticipated.

A fucking Uchiha. Isn't it always them?

And as if that wasn't enough, it was a masked one! Everyone - even the dumbass meat bags should know that Uchihas don't mask themselves - no matter how ugly they are. But that guy was masked. Ugh, an orange mask of all things. Sickening. A nice, natural, burnt orange is a great color for fur, but neon orange, in a swirl pattern? What kind of weird Uchiha was that?

Well, he was powerful and he summoned him. Madara had been the only one able to summon him: that asshat. But there was no way Madara Fucking Uchiha would wear a mask: that guy was too in love with himself. Oh, he was also in love with Hashirama Senju, Kurama was pretty sure. He remembered that from the days of that bitch, Mito. Of course, the Senju guy loved the Uzumaki woman, the weird (and the worst) person that he was. Kurama wanted them all to fuck off and die.

He had just breathed in the air of the forests of Konoha when he suddenly remembered that he had done this before. Naruto? Where had Naruto gone? He looked around and saw shinobi coming at him, shooting pathetic jutsus and throwing bombs and such at him, and was shocked. Wasn't I just in the Fourth Shinobi War? Weren't Naruto and I…

The Yellow-Haired Idiot and the chief of those damned amphibians then landed on his head and all he could do was roll his eyes. Fucking hell. Kami, he hated those toads! If there was one thing that he and his pathetic little Tanuki brother could agree on, it was that Gamabunta deserved a special tar pit in hell for jumping on superior beings' heads. He just laid there for a bit and looked at the Yondaime, nearly smiling, despite himself, at how much he looked like Naruto. The Idiot took no notice and teleported him out of there.

Kurama felt that this time it would be different. He was just waiting around for Naruto's shrimpy kit body to show up, figuring that this time around she could have her parents in her life. Then suddenly, he must not have been in control of himself anymore - once again. When he became fully aware of his surroundings, he was already aiming his claw through Naruto's parents' abdomens. All he could feel was horror and shame. Although he figured what had happened was the same thing that had happened the first time around and knew logically that it was ultimately the Uchiha's fault, he would forever feel that he should have prepared himself better.

Failing to that same Uchiha? Failing Naruto again? Upon finding himself behind the bars of Naruto's seal, a tear rolled down the great nine-tailed fox's snout.

Now, so many years later, he felt that whatever had put them in this position had been a blessing. For one, they had a certain degree of foreknowledge. Secondly, his kit was calmer and far more mature. She also had friends - smart ones at that. Not to mention she had him as her partner since the beginning. Most of all, Kurama was no longer blinded by hatred. He should have cared for the kit at least a bit throughout their past lifetime, or at least seen the kit as simply the child she was. It had never been the child's fault that her chakra reserves were the most vast, and therefore she had been chosen to be his vessel after all.

In many ways, Naruto was the same brat she had always been, but she no longer had to put on an act. She also had budding confidence that she had never felt before in her abilities and in reaching her goals. Most of all, Kurama was happy that Naruto was happy this time around. Living with the deer-herders was good for both of them.

Unfortunately, something had happened that made him lose years of memories, just as Naruto had. He could only hope that his father had something to do with this, but Kurama remained highly suspicious that they'd been fucked with by another Uchiha.

"So how do I look," Naruto asked Shikamaru as she posed ridiculously in an extremely fancy blue kimono, the same shade as her eyes. It had jewels and all kinds of sparkly things that she didn't know whether or not were real, but they were super pretty. The man-turned-boy wouldn't look at her for some reason but groaned. Yoshino was helping Naruto finish her makeup and repeating tips on using proper etiquette in the formal attire, but Naruto wasn't really paying attention. She certainly wasn't going to tell Yoshino-san that she had weapons strapped to her arms and legs underneath the garment.

"Shika-kun! Tell Naru-chan how beautiful she looks," chided the Nara matriarch. "Just look at her!"

Naruto gave a sickeningly sweet smile and rapidly batted her lacquered eyelashes at the Nara heir. "Troublesome," he responded. The girl snorted before laughing out loud. The young man only scowled at her and shook his head.

"What's your problem today, Shika-kun," the blonde smiled. "Are you okay?" The Nara grunted (like a buck) affirmatively. You learn these things after living with someone for all these years, she thought happily. Looking in the mirror at her hair as well as the back of the kimono, she was pleasantly surprised. "Oh, look, Shika: the Uzumaki spiral is on the back of my kimono! Isn't it beautiful?" The spiral was in the same shade of blue as the rest of the kimono, but had a different fabric and was outlined with more jewels - or whatever they are.

"I noticed that right off, Naru-chan. Of course, I was standing behind you at the time, so yeah," the shadow user responded with a yawn and shrug that seemed really fake. She frowned at him, questioning his attitude. The Nara simply shrugged his shoulders.

Fine, two can play that way.

"Now it's time for you and Shikaku to head off to the Hokage Tower, Naru-chan. Don't want to keep the Sandaime waiting!" Yoshina merrily pushed the blonde out of the bedroom she was in before Naruto could do something to her son, into the living room where Shikaku was sprawled out over a couch.

"Troublesome girl. Are you ready to go?" Naruto nodded her head, noting that her long hair was a little wobbly in the elaborate hairstyle she was wearing. "Don't move your head around so much. Yoshino will kill us if you mess up your hair or anything," the man grumbled, getting to his feet. "Sunshinning will also ruin your hair… What a drag." The two left the Nara Clan Compound and headed into the middle of Konoha.

An incessant pecking on his window told him all he needed to know: he had a message from the Hokage. He had just woken up at the sound and had only been home from his mission for a few hours before that, but the shinobi quickly trudged his way to his window to stop the infernal racket and check his message. Wasn't he supposed to be off following his mission?

Apparently not. No fair. Attached to the messenger bird was a summons to see the Hokage immediately, because of "circumstances beyond his control." What does that even mean? The silver-haired man rubbed his masked chin and eyes tiredly, trying to remember a time when he had heard something like this before and could not come up with anything. He was sure something serious was going on, however: all of his shinobi instincts told him that. He dressed quickly and headed to the Tower.

He was not prepared for what awaited him.

Marriage.

"Sir? Umm…" Kakashi cleared his throat. Hiruzen dipped his hat so that the Hatake couldn't see the single moment of amusement that crossed his old features. Kakashi wasn't normally one to let his figurative or literal mask slip. "Gomennasai, Hokage-sama. What I mean is, what marriage? And with whom?"

"I believe this file will explain everything, Kakashi-kun." The Hokage handed over a file with a blank cover. The first pages had most of the information blacked out: it was heavily classified to all eyes other than the Hokage, apparently. Turning the fourth page, he nearly dropped the whole packet. Not only did he see the name of his intended, but he found pictures of her as well. Kami-sama. He had to purposefully stop his hands from shaking in front of his leader.

"Why don't you sit down and review the information for a few moments, Kakashi-kun?"

Said man simply nodded as he nearly fell into the seat that was behind him.

She was beautiful - much too much for a man like him. And she had his exact coloring. Kakashi had to keep his breathing in check. She had bigger eyes, shaped like her mother's, and she certainly did not look her age. No, she looked older. He quickly moved past those photos, feeling a little sick that he had even noticed. But how could I not notice that?

Quickly scanning the rest of the file he winced. Assassination attempts, hospital stays - most of it from years back, but it looked bad. And where was I? Avoiding her like the plague. I'm worse than scum. Kakashi accidentally let out a groan. Minato-sensei and Kushina-nee hadn't wanted to know if they would have a boy or girl. Kakashi knew they'd named the child Naruto, and he had figured that it was a boy. Wait: wasn't that a character in one of Jiraiya-sama's books? The one sensei always had? Cripes.

She should've been my sister!

And he'd completely put the girl out of his mind after seeing her in that bar so many years ago.

As Kakashi continued to read the file he felt anger building within himself. The council wanted to do what with her now? He looked up at the Sandaime darkly, who nodded at him - no pleasantries left on his face. "I see. When will this take place?" He resigned himself. He'd been a coward long enough. It was time to repay his sensei and protect the man's daughter.

"Right now," the Sandaime replied, pulling out a bag of what was probably clothes. Kakashi could only gape.