HINT #8- The time Kaminari was caught off guard (and slipped up really bad)

Family had always been a touchy subject for Kaminari.

That was pretty much to be expected, given he'd been tortured physically and mentally by those who called themselves his parents, but he'd never really understood the concept of it. It was just so...foreign. Seeing his classmates talk so fondly about their mother, fathers, and siblings was just so strange to Kaminari.

Don't get him wrong, the months he'd spent with his friends at the school were the best he'd ever had. It had been the first time in his fifteen years of living that he'd received praise, received compliments, basically just received any form of love at all.

It was, for lack of a better word, incredible. Though his classmates, as fantastic as they were, couldn't make up for fifteen years of being unwanted, unloved, and degraded, the fact that they cared about him at all was more than enough for Kaminari. It gave him an almost euphoric feeling, making his heart all warm and his head all fuzzy whenever one of them so much as slung an arm around his shoulders. It was intoxicating, it was addicting, and Kaminari craved the feeling of being wanted and needed.

Who could blame him after the childhood he'd had?

Kaminari's classmates were always happy to indulge in his addiction, albeit unknowingly. Affection just came so naturally to most of his friends, especially from people like Kirishima or Mina. They gave out affection like candy on Halloween, and Kaminari absolutely basked in it.

In all, Kaminari knew it was silly. He was a charismatic dude, and he himself wasn't opposed to clinging onto someone for hours or casually pecking their cheek just to let them know he cared about them. He didn't know if it was because he was touch starved or what, but he liked to give out affection almost as much as he received it. He had to make up for lost time, after all.

The point is, the past seven months of being genuinely loved by nineteen wonderful people had been the best seven months of his life.

But the fact that the rest of his classmates had been receiving that kind of love for almost their entire lives made him just a little bit jealous.

It was understandable, though, of course, because in Kaminari's opinion his classmates deserved all the love in the world, but he still couldn't scratch that stupid itch. What was worse was the fact that he knew some of his classmates didn't exactly have a perfect home life, but that didn't stop him from being envious every time the topic of family came up.

Sure, Midoriya's dad had disappeared to who knows where, but at least his mom loved him more than anything else in the world.

Yes, Bakugou's parents yelled an awful lot, but not out of anger or hate. It was their own strange version of tough love, and probably the only kind they knew how to express. He would know, especially since Bakugou was the exact same way.

Hell, even Endeavor, a man who was borderline abusive and was hated universally by both heroes and villains, at least remembered his son's birthday. The only reason Kaminari still knew his was because he, Toga, and the other two kids in the assassination ring would come together secretly every year to celebrate it.

Kaminari was in no way trying to undermine his classmate's trauma. Hell, he'd roundhouse kick Endeavor in the face in Todoroki's name if he could, but the point was that all of his classmates had received years worth of love more than Kaminari ever had, and probably could ever hope to. He'd always be behind in that department, whether he liked it or not.

Of course, Kaminari had no problem with that. His classmates deserved to be loved by everyone and anyone, least of all their parents. Hell, Kaminari would relive his childhood a hundred times over again to just keep any one of them from experiencing anything even remotely close to what he went through, and he'd be okay with it. They deserved the world as far as he was concerned.

He just tended to get a little distant and clam up whenever the topic of childhood came up; that's all. He couldn't exactly stop his classmates from talking about their family experiences, no matter how many unpleasant memories unearthed themselves when they did. He'd never deny all of his friends something just because it was a little uncomfortable for him, so he usually just opted to shut the fuck up and let his mind wander.

"Yeah." Kaminari could faintly hear Yaoyorozu's voice in the back of his mind before he promptly forced it out again. At least assassin training was good for something, he supposed, even if that something was completely tuning out his classmate's voice so he wasn't plagued by memories of gore and torture every time the word 'childhood' came up. "It was honestly one of the most luxurious vacations I've ever had in my life! The beaches in Bora Bora are amazing, I swear!"

"Bora Bora certainly is a beautiful country!" Iida adjusted his glasses. "My family and I spent two weeks there in our private beach house. It truly was an experience." The class president soaked up Yaoyorozu's self-satisfied nod and turned to the rest of the class, who were either watching him with mild amusement or an awe-struck expression (cough Uraraka cough). "Has anyone else gotten the pleasure to experience Bora Bora's luxurious beaches? Todoroki, perhaps?"

Kaminari hummed to himself. Ah yes, the rich kid trio, unintentionally flexing their wealth since day one. Thankfully, it didn't seem like this wasn't one of those rare in-depth talks about everyone's past. It mostly seemed to be just about vacations and lavish experiences and such that only the three resident bazillionaires could relate to.

Kaminari shifted forward in his seat a little, not really paying attention but not as wary as he usually was during impromptu class reminiscing sessions.

Todoroki shrugged in response to Iida's inquiry, his face stoic as usual. "My father never believed in taking time off. However, I do believe we had a trip planned to some beach or other, but those got canceled after my older brother passed away."

Kaminari fell out of his fucking seat.

Luckily, no one seemed to notice over their own horrified gasps and sympathetic words.

Oh. Right. Touya Todoroki's death hadn't exactly been a public scandal. This was probably the first time any of his classmates were hearing about it.

"Oh, Todoroki!" Uraraka was up in a flash, crossing the common room and going around the couch to give him a back hug. "I'm so so so so sorry. That must've been awful."

"Yeah." Midoriya nodded along, face sympathetic and soft. "When did this happen?"

Todoroki gave a half shrug, immediately averting his eyes from his classmates. "I was young." He thought for a moment. Kaminari could faintly hear Todoroki choke up, which was arguably more alarming than that random confession. Todoroki never cried. "Six years ago, I think. Maybe less."

"Babes!" Mina sprang up from where she'd been styling a (reluctant) Bakugou's hair and slid into the seat next to Todoroki, shoving Mineta off the couch as she did so to make room. "That's awful, honey. No one should have to go through a relative dying, especially one as close as a brother."

"Yeah." Todoroki simply nodded, face contorting into an expression akin to pain but not letting any tears fall. "It was...a hard year."

"Mmm." Hagakure hummed in response, petting Todoroki's hair from somewhere behind him. "I don't mean to pry, but when did this happen? I feel like something like that happening to the number two hero's son would make headlines for weeks."

"Don't say anything if you're not comfortable," Kirishima added from the loveseat. "I know it was a long time ago, but we're here for ya, man."

Todoroki smiled softly in thanks, and Kaminari had to scramble to regain his composure and get back into his seat before someone looked over because what the fuck had just happened.

He didn't think he would ever hear anyone mention Touya Todoroki again, not in the depths of the black-market, and definitely not relaxing in the common room with his friends.

To make matters worse, he had handled that whole situation so badly that it was a miracle no one had noticed his strange reaction.

Kaminari frowned and curled up tighter in his seat, observing from afar as the girls and a few other classmates comforted Todoroki. He was so not prepared for this.

As much as Kaminari wanted to go over there and offer Todoroki a hug or reassuring words of his own, he couldn't. No matter how much assassin training he had, it wouldn't change the fact that he despised lying to his friends in any way, shape, or form unless absolutely necessary.

So how could he tell Todoroki "I'm sorry for your loss" when his supposedly deceased big brother was just a phone call away?

xxx

To be fair, Kaminari didn't even know if the phone number worked anymore, or even if they were still friends. They had been once. A very long time ago. Touya, though Kaminari knew him as Dabi, had often said he thought of the blond as a little brother. He'd always appreciated that.

Kaminari hadn't spoken to Dabi in, hell, it must've been ages. He hadn't since he'd run away, and certainly not after he'd entered UA. After all, his classmates would probably find it pretty weird if they saw him casually talking with someone from the League of Villains in the dead of night.

Kaminari did a double-take at that thought.

Oh god. The League of Villains. So Toga and Dabi were together? He mentally slapped himself. That should've been the first thing he'd connected when Toga had told him of her new profession! Though to be fair, he'd been too caught up in seeing someone he'd thought bit the fucking dust for the first time in forever to think about Dabi at that moment.

Kaminari furrowed his brow, his mind running a mile a minute. Were he and Dabi still friends? He hadn't put much thought into it before now. For one, Dabi was definitely aware of Kaminari's whereabouts and actively knew that the League of Villains had been hunting him down and attempting to capture him for the past five or six months, but that didn't make sense, right? Dabi was one of the primary reasons Kaminari escaped his parents in the first place. There was no way he would try to return him to that hell hole. Right?

Dabi wasn't inherently evil, but he was a villain. Kaminari knew him well enough to know that he wasn't someone who murdered people for fun, but he wouldn't protest if someone asked. His hatred was less for innocent civilians and more for the hero commission, which Kaminari couldn't really fault him for because A: the hero commission was arguably more corrupt than the assassination ring and B: Endeavor was his dad, which was pretty self-explanatory.

In fact, Kaminari specifically remembered that Dabi had vowed from the very first moment he'd met him that he'd do everything in his power to become the exact opposite of his father, whether that meant becoming a villain or not. Kaminari had accepted it, because who was he to tell Touya Todoroki no?

But now Toga was with him. Had he been the one who made the decision not to tell her that they were hunting down Kaminari? Tell her that he was alive? Had he purposely hidden that information from her for a reason, whether that be their friendship, emotional attachment, or something else? Had Toga told Dabi of their interaction in the forest?

Kaminari could barely think. There were just so many things, so many variables that didn't make sense.

On the other hand, Dabi had never directly targeted Kaminari, which could either be a coincidence or an attempt to keep him safe and out of harm's way.

Dabi had told him that he thought of him as a little brother, but Kaminari had to keep into consideration that his actual little brother was enrolled in the same class he was. How had Dabi reacted to that? Did he know? Was he making a conscious effort to keep Todoroki safe as well? Did he even care about Todoroki anymore? How would Todoroki react if he found out he was alive? Did Todoroki know he was alive? What if he was just faking?

Kaminari was spiraling, and he knew it.

It was just sheer luck Bakugou decided at that very moment to snap at him.

"Dunce Face?" Bakugou's tone was more questioning than mean, but Kaminari's head shot up nonetheless. His eyes were wide, his face was pale, and he probably looked a lot more suspicious than he should've, but all the eyes staring at him grounded him to some extent. "You good? You look like you've seen a fucking ghost or something."

"Oh." Kaminari almost slapped himself. Why couldn't he have at least waited until he was alone or something to have an existential crisis? "Sorry. Just zoned out for a second there, I'm all good."

"You sure?" Sero didn't sound convinced. "You were kinda staring off into space there, Denks. You looked like you were about to have a panic attack."

Kaminari paused before plastering on an easy smile. "No, I'm alright. Just my quirk messing with my brain again, you know how it is." He turned to Todoroki before anyone could say anything else. "I'm really sorry about Touya though, Todoroki. I'm sure he loved you a lot."

Kaminari realized he'd fucked up the second the words left his mouth.

Todoroki turned so fast to stare at the blond that he was lucky he didn't get whiplash.

Kaminari flinched, actually flinched, because he had never seen such a look plastered on his friend's face before. His eyes were wider than he'd ever seen them, succeeding in nothing except increasing Kaminari's nervousness tenfold. His lips were pursed, and he was rubbing them against each other as if trying to decide what to say about Kaminari's apparent slip-up.

The electricity user could practically see the gears turning in his friend's head, and if Todoroki was as smart as everyone gave him credit for, Kaminari was in for a hell of a ride.

Luckily, the rest of his classmates weren't so perceptive. None of them seemed to had noticed Kaminari's blatantly obvious mistake but Todoroki, and he could only pray that his duel-haired friend wouldn't call him out of it in front of everyone. He would already have a hard time talking his way out of this one to one person, let alone nineteen others.

"Kaminari. My room." Todoroki's voice was strangled. "Now."

Dread pooled at the bottom of Kaminari's gut.

He was fucked.

xxx

Todoroki yanked Kaminari along to his dorm, leaving the surprised cries from their classmates behind.

On the outside, Kaminari seemed relatively unbothered and a little confused, but on the inside, his heart was pounding like it never had before. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd been this nervous. When he'd escaped his parents, maybe? Was it the first time he ever had to kill someone? The time he'd accidentally hurt Bakugou?

One thing was for sure, though. This confrontation was either going to be really awkward or really bad. As far as Kaminari could see, there was no in-between.

The pair reached Todoroki's dorm in a matter of minutes, and Kaminari was practically thrown through the threshold as Todoroki followed right behind him, slamming the door the second he entered the room.

Kaminari honestly wasn't sure if Todoroki was angry, flustered, confused, or whatever, but he wasn't focusing on that right now. His primary concern was whatever upcoming interaction they were about to have, and he needed to play his cards right or else the carefully crafted facade he'd worked so hard down could crumble in a matter of seconds.

He would wait for his older friend to make the first move, and then he would improv the rest of his act based on that. Basic deception tactic, one that Kaminari (admittedly) used often.

The silence that settled between the two friends was suffocating.

"You knew his name," Todoroki whispered finally. Whatever ferocity and energy he'd displayed before tapered out the moment he'd opened his mouth. "I never told anyone his name."

"Oh," Kaminari said dumbly as if he didn't already know because of course he did. He'd been berating himself for the error the millisecond those words had left his mouth. "Yeah."

Todoroki lifted his head to look at him with sad, sad eyes, and Kaminari had never felt so guilty in his life. He shifted back and forth hesitantly. He was half hoping he would develop some sort of mind-reading quirk right about now, but no such luck.

"You knew his name," Todoroki repeated, and Kaminari couldn't even deny it.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, because that was really the only thing he could say. He was sorry for fucking up. He was sorry for unlocking such painful memories. He was sorry for Todoroki's terrible childhood. He was sorry for Todoroki's awful family. He was sorry he wasn't able to protect his friend sooner. He was so, so, so sorry Todoroki couldn't see his beloved big brother ever again without getting his heart broken a second time.

In all of his fifteen years of living, Kaminari had brutally assassinated thousands of people, been the victim of ruthless torture, watched countless people die, and Todoroki bursting into unrestrained tears at his apology was still the most painful thing he'd ever seen.

Kaminari wasted no time in leaping from his seat on the floor and onto his friend, wrapping his arms around his shaking form and hugging him like his life depended on it.

To the electricity user's relief, Todoroki didn't pull away. He melted into the embrace, relaxing entirely in Kaminari's hold and twisting around so he could sob into his shirt.

That was fine. If it meant Todoroki could get his feelings out, he could stain as many shirts as he wanted.

xxx

They sat there for a bit, one teenager crying his eyes out and the other rubbing soothing circles on his back and feeling so incredibly guilty he could barely breathe. God, the one time he let something slip it had turned Todoroki, Shouto Todoroki, the kid who was so utterly unbothered by everything the world threw at him, into a sobbing mess.

He hated it. God, he hated it.

"Please," Todoroki mumbled into his shirt, so softly that Kaminari wasn't sure if he'd imagined it or not. The duel-haired boy tightened his grip on Kaminari's sleeve, fisting it in a way that was borderline desperate. "How did you know?"

Kaminari sighed. "Todoroki..."

"Please." He whispered again, and Kaminari swore his heart broke a little. "Please, just...just tell me. I won't tell anyone, I swear. I just...I j-I need to know. Please." He looked up at the electricity user with wet, wet eyes. "There were no news reports, no rumors, no gossip, no anything about him! No one knows it happened, Kaminari! No one except my family, a few heroes, and now all our friends! But you did!" He took a deep breath, trying and failing to steady himself. "I know you came from a really fucked up childhood, and I can't ask you to relive those memories, but I need to know I...you knew Toga, right? That's a humongous coincidence, right? Did my brother come to you? Did something else happen to him? Did you meet him? Is he not actually dead, did...I...no I just...did he not want me I just don't understand-"

"Todoroki..." Kaminari repeated softly.

Todoroki broke down all over again.

"Please." His voice was borderline hysteric now. "You know something; you have to know something. You know his name, that's something, right! No one knows his name. I never said his name, so how do you know his name! I just...I can't-"

"Shhhh." Kaminari guided Todoroki's head back into his chest. "I'm sorry." His voice was barely audible over Todoroki's shaky breaths. "I shouldn't have said anything if I knew it would upset you this much. I'm so, so, so sorry."

"His name." Todoroki sniffled weakly. "What about his name."

"Shhhh, it's okay. This is all my fault." Kaminari soothed, running his fingers through Todoroki's hair as he racked his brain for a suitable answer. "I would try to stay out on the streets as often as I could, y'know? It was mostly so that I wouldn't have to face my parents all the time. Your brother and I met outside one day." He kept his voice soothing and his words smooth, all the while keeping up the comforting motions on Todoroki's back. "We hung out a lot. He would complain to me about Endeavor, and I would talk to him about my stupid parents. Even though you know Toga healed my wounds, your big brother was my emotional support system."

"He did go out a lot." Todoroki mused quietly to himself. Kaminari nodded. He knew well enough.

Dabi, or should he say Touya, had been 'visiting' the black-market day after day from the time he was thirteen up until he ran away and came to stay permanently at sixteen. It had been strange to have a hero's son in the compound for a few weeks, but the two had formed a close friendship early on.

Thinking back, in a way he had been Kaminari's emotional support system. Whereas Toga would nod and make sarcastic comments as the electricity user would talk about the things he had to go through, Dabi would offer advice and express his sympathy. In all, it was close enough to the truth to make Kaminari feel slightly more at ease. Lying to his friends sucked ass.

Todoroki gave a wet chuckle. "Small world, huh."

Kaminari nodded. Todoroki's breathing was steadily becoming less and less erratic. That was good. He continued. "One day, he didn't meet up at our usual spot. That day turned into weeks, and those weeks turned into months." He swallowed thickly. He had to sell this, or it was all over. "One day, three months after Touya disappeared, I overheard two pro-heroes talking the...um...the death of Endeavor's son. So I kinda just...connecting the dots and I've known ever since."

"I'm sorry," Todoroki whispered, and Kaminari wanted to die.

He shook his head quickly. "Don't say that. He's your brother." He unlatched his arms from Todoroki to look him in the eye. His friend did the same. "I'm sure it was much harder on you than it was on me."

Todoroki smiled. It was sad. Kaminari despised it.

"I idolized him." He said quietly. "But it sounds like you were closer to him than I ever was."

And that was true. Kaminari hated it, but it was true.

"He loved you a lot." Kaminari worried at his bottom lip. "He really did."

And that was true, too. Dabi used to go on for hours about his siblings, particularly his youngest brother. His desire to keep them safe from their father was one of his primary motivations for becoming a villain, actually. It was strange how easily things could get twisted.

Todoroki chewed his bottom lip. "So that was why you started panicking earlier, right? Because I brought that subject up?"

Kaminari paused. Wow, uh...that was actually a perfect explanation for his earlier behavior. Way to go, Todoroki. "Yeah, that's why. I just didn't want to say anything because...you know. It's a super-sensitive subject. For both of us, it seems." He waved his hands around as if to punctuate his statement.

"Hm." Todoroki scrubbed the tears off his face. His cheeks were stained red and his eyes were still glossy, but he was better, and he'd accepted Kaminari's answer wholeheartedly. It was kind of true, in a way. He'd just left out all the blood, torture, training, and illegal stuff, that's all.

That little loophole did nothing for the guilt eating him up inside, though.

Kaminari looked at Todoroki for a moment longer before straining his ears. From what he could tell, the rest of their classmates had vacated the common room and were now either in their own or each other's rooms hanging out or sleeping, which made sense. It was late, and knowing them, their friends would probably get a good night's sleep and then berate him and Todoroki early the next morning about what the hell happened.

Wordlessly, Kaminari grabbed Todoroki's wrist and carefully tip-toed out the door, keeping his feet silent and deliberately dragging the, admittedly a little confused, duel-haired boy with him.

Sure enough, when the pair entered the common room, the lights were off, and there were no classmates in sight.

Perfect. He knew exactly what both of them needed.

"Hey." He poked Todoroki's tear-stained cheek. "You wanna watch Cuna de Lobos?"

Todoroki hummed. "Yeah." He dabbed at his eyes again, his passive demeanor slowly but surely falling back into place. "A telenovela sounds good right about now."

xxx

A bottle of whipped cream, three bags of popcorn, and a season finale later, the pair groggily said good night and made their way back to their respective dorm rooms.

It had been two in the morning when they finished the show, but it was somewhere around three when they managed to untangle themselves from their mass of pillows, blankets, and each other to actually clean up and get to bed.

Kaminari honestly never would've pegged Todoroki for the cuddly-affectionate type, but countless nights of practically laying on top of each other with half-lidded eyes as they watched drama after drama had proved to him that the poster child for indifference was just as clingy as he was while watching people curse each other out in Spanish.

Binging telenovelas in the dead of night with Todoroki was the fucking bomb.

Kaminari groaned as he swung the door to his dorm room shut, flopping down on his bed and rubbing his eyes. He felt terrible about making Todoroki stay up so late, especially with everything he'd been through that day, but it wasn't like they hadn't pulled all-nighters together before. Plus, Todoroki needed something to take his mind off everything for a little while, even if it meant he'd be a bit tired in class the next day.

Kaminari groaned and pushed himself up on the bed, considering. He glanced at his phone on his bedside table for a moment, weighing his options.

In the end, he decided there was really no harm in doing it.

He plucked his phone from the table and typed in the passcode. He clicked on 'Messages' and scrolled through his contacts, not stopping until he got to the very end where an unedited and unnamed number sat.

It was stupid, he knew, and the number probably didn't even work anymore since he'd gotten it so long ago, but Kaminari typed out a message anyway, albeit hesitantly. He was probably just getting his hopes up, but whatever. He could send out one simple text message no sweat.

He settled on six words.

xxx

Me: Shouto misses you. I do too.

xxx

He pressed send before he could second guess himself.

If the text had been to anyone else, Kaminari would've made the message a lot longer, capitalized random words, and added a bunch of emoticons, but this was Dabi. Chances were he'd find him and kick his ass for doing something like that.

Of course, he wasn't suspecting a reply anyway. The chances the number was still active and in use were already small enough, and the chances that someone as no-nonsense as Dabi would even take the time to reply were even slimmer.

That was one trait the two Todorokis in Kaminari's life shared. They both sucked ass at responding. That, and their poker-faces were literally unreal.

So when his phone vibrated on the table approximately thirty minutes later, he'd flinched so hard he nearly stabbed himself with the knife he'd been cleaning.

He hastily set the weapon down and grabbed his phone, typing in his passcode and wasting no time in opening the messaging app. He clicked on the conversation, holding a breath he quickly released when he realized he actually got a reply back holy shit. And it was long.

xxx

Unknown: Shouto's a good kid. Keep him out of trouble for me, would you? And stay safe yourself, Goldie. I can only keep you safe from Crusty Ass for so long, but I'm trying what I can to keep you from going back to that shit hole with your fuckass parents. Himiko's being really fucking annoying by the way and wants me to tell you she loves you so much, but that's fucking disgusting, so I'm just gonna say she says hi. Don't die, kid. Come see us sometime or something.

xxx

It was only after Kaminari finished reading the text message that he realized he was smiling.

He didn't dare text back, clearly understanding that the conversation ended there, but it cemented the fact that he and Dabi were still friends. That was a relief, at least. It was also something he could potentially use to his advantage in the future.

As amazing as that was, it also proved that if it came down to it, Dabi and Toga would pick the League over Kaminari if they had to make a choice, which was honestly quite understandable.

The League of Villains had become to them what UA had become to Kaminari. A home, of sorts. A place to feel loved and be loved unconditionally. Though Kaminari couldn't comprehend how a bunch of villains, assassins, and vigilantes could possibly feel the same love for each other as Class 1-A did, he respected it.

The truth of the matter was that Toga and Dabi were doing everything in their power to keep him safe, and in turn, he was doing the same.

After all, as Kaminari had stated before, they weren't inherently evil. The world had wronged them. They just wanted revenge. That was really all there was to it.

Be as that may, and though he understood, Kaminari hoped to whatever god was listening that it would never actually come down to the three of them facing off.

They all already had enough scars. They didn't need and others.

Plus, that shit would get messy real fast.