I do not own Everyday Life with Monstergirls.
Chapter 32 Monster-girl parties are Wild.
"Thank you for sharing that with us, Tetra." The Mistress nodded slowly.
Tetra nodded back. This time she didn't cry while recalling her past. She did pause and squeeze Jack's hand at a couple points. Sometimes fairly hard, but he didn't complain.
"That is quite a tale." The Mistress continued. "Have you reached out to this Hector yet?"
Tetra's gaze lowered. "I, I haven't." An unspoken question prompted her to elaborate. "I, I think I should spend more time around other humans before I..." She trailed off.
The Mistress shook her head. "My dear, you have more experience with humanity than most of my colony combined, save for Serilla." Tetra blinked and faced up. Jil'tanith lifted a hand. "And you're not going to get any more meaningful insights on how to interact with humans down here with us." She casually waved at Jack. "You're mate's presence notwithstanding."
She approached her newest member to within a half-arm's length. "In my experience, one of the best ways to learn something is to just do it." A lingering uncertainty in Tetra's mind was banished by the Mistress' next words. "You're not alone anymore Tetra. And you already have the greatest resource for learning about humans." She nodded at Jack, who smiled back.
"Don't let your doubts become another obstacle." She continued. "We are arachne, if we can't trap it, we get around it. If we can't slice it, we exhaust it till it drops."
"Or we just smash it." Valura smirked with a raised fist. The other women chuckled, Jack snorted.
"Or we just smash it." Jil'tanith sardonically repeated. She inclined her head. "I won't order you to meet with this man, but I will strongly implore that you do so."
Tetra took in a sharp breath. She was in a colony again. She answered to her mistress. "I, I will Mistress."
Jack cocked his head. "Do you, already know where he is?"
Tetra glanced down at him. "I don't but, Ms. Wolfe provided me his phone number." She lifted a hand. "I can contact him any time."
The Mistress hummed positively. "Well then, it seems there's only one thing left to do." Her smile flashed. "Start the party."
Agent Smythe rubbed his thumb and middle finger over his forehead.
"You're certain that he's safe?"
Agent Serilla nodded. "Of course sir. Mistress Jil'tanith has given her word that he is a guest. No harm will befall Jack as long as he is under their protection." She raised a hand to her chest. "My people will put themselves in harm's way before he's hurt."
The senior coordinator drew in a slow breath and leaned back from his desk. "I really do not appreciate being unable to contact them and get an update. He was just supposed to retrieve Tetra."
"Tetra has joined the colony sir." She reminded. "There's no need to 'retrieve' her."
Agent Smythe almost grimaced but resolved to keep any further sign of displeasure from his features. "He had to pick the one forest with the one arachne colony underneath it." He intoned with annoyance.
Serilla cocked her head and smirked. "I can always go back myself sir."
He shook his head curtly. "No. No...I won't give your mistress any reason to suspect a lack of trust. We stick to the agreement as written."
She nodded. "As you say sir. May I resume my regular duties then?"
He raised a finger. "Yes, but as soon as you hear anything, you contact me."
She nodded again. "Of course sir."
He swallowed. "And agent?" She raised her head attentively. "I will want a face to face with the madam at her soonest convenience."
She raised a hand. "I will inform her as soon as I am able." She retreated to the office door and lingered. "Is there anything else sir?"
A pause. His brow furrowed. "Tell me again agent." He propped up his elbows and laced his fingers. "Tell me I'm not going to have a repeat incident of an arachne harming one of my hosts."
She dipped her head solemnly. "There is no reason to fear for Jack's safety sir. I am sure Mistress Jil'tanith and the rest of the colony are taking every precaution."
"AAAAAHAHAHAHA!"
Jack slide down the arachne constructed silk slide at breakneck and irresponsible speed. The smooth threads allowed him no purchase to arrest his momentum. Clusters of bio-luminescent fungi on the cave walls whipped by overhead. They were the only sign that he wasn't falling into pure darkness.
The slide roiled and pitched, launching Jack into the air.
"HOOOLYYY SHIIIIIII!"
Something snagged the back of his waist and yanked him back onto the slide. He craned his head back and caught just a glimpse of a creature waving at him.
"What the hell was-"
He had maybe four seconds to deduce what had transpired when the slide pitched him off again.
"OHGODAAAAHHH!"
This time he could see the four arachne he was flying toward, perched on two stalactites. They unfurled a large net between them and caught his body. But instead of wrapping him up like he expected, they heaved the net and launched Jack back at the slide.
He hit on his feet and immediately started tumbling ass over tea kettle. "Woah! Woah, Wha!"
Something caught his wrists and the spinning stopped. He looked up into the face of the long legs breed that held him. She was suspended by a thread of her own and they swung in tandem through the darkness.
She gave a wink with three eyes and then let go.
"Nononono-ufff!"
Jack was back on the slide, no longer tumbling but still careening toward death.
A brightness ahead of him grabbed his attention. The end of the slide was rapidly approaching. Larger clusters of fungi lit up the region. Several arachne were arrayed in a semi-circle at a landing. Two of the large breed held the end of the slide above their heads, forming a ramp.
"Shitshitshitshit NOOOO!" Jack propelled off the end into the air. This time there was no net to catch him. He was flying off into solid darkness.
"Wulrfff!" He was tugged by his whole body. The world blurred in reverse.
Then it stopped.
A thunderous barrage blasted his ears and he looked about. Half the colony was cheering all around him.
He glanced down and recognized the chitinous dark gray arms of his girlfriend around his chest. He giggled like a loon and glanced up at her face. "Hehehe. Caught me again eh?"
She smiled and kissed him while nicking several threads off his person. "You're quite welcome, Jack." She loosened her grip and let him down.
He regained his footing and leaned over, panting and holding a hand to his pounding chest. A few of the small breeds starting pointing and giggling at him.
He blinked rapidly. "What? What are you?" Something felt off about his pants and he examined them.
"Ah godz. I pissed myself." Some more of the crowd started laughing. "I pissed myself." He chuckled incredulously at his predicament. "I don't know if it was the first time I flew off or the second?" He rattled his head and gave up trying to pinpoint the exact moment he lost bladder control.
"Doesn't matter." He faced them all and announced. "Okay!" He pointed outward with both index fingers. "I am going to change my pants. And then someone better get me back up there. 'Cause we are doing that again!"
The crowd roared their approval.
"Do we have any idea when he's going to be back?" Syleris whined. "It feels weird, like that time he ran out of the house without telling us."
Dawn handed over a dry plate. "No, but Tetra's with him. He'll be fine."
The harpy shook her head. "I'm not worried about that." She carefully placed the plate on a stack in the cupboard. "It just...it's his house, and we're all the guests."
Dawn shrugged and set another pot into the sink. "Maybe the negotiations got complicated and some details need to be ironed out. Just be patient."
Syleris dipped her head and stepped back from the counter. "I wanted to go out and shop for more books today."
The yuki-onna turned and faced her friend. "Sula's got a decent collection. You could ask to borrow some of hers."
The harpy hummed. "I doubt those are useful as medical texts..." Dawn raised an eyebrow and narrowed her other eye. "But it's better than nothing." Syleris lamented.
"Cheer up." Dawn encouraged. "I'm sure they're just discussing important legalities and cultural bylaws around a table. The boring but necessary stuff that the Exchange has to contend with."
Syleris sighed. "If you say so." She sullenly padded out of the room to search for their other housemate.
"Read 'em and cry."
Jack's eyes fixed on the dark-haired large breed arachne across the table. Like Valura, her frame resembled the upper half of a heavy-weight body builder attached to a ginormous dark tarantula. Her thick hair was black at the base but lightened to an almost silvery white at the tips. He could just make out her six black eyes from her midnight colored face by their glossy reflections from the glowing mushrooms just overhead.
Behind a huge toothy grin she laid her two cards face up. A queen and an ace of diamonds.
Two cards that matched suit with the three other face-up cards in the center.
He sobbed (internally) for a second and then cleared his throat. "The phrase is, 'read 'em and weep'."
She brushed her dark claws through her silver-black mane, dismissing his correction. "Same t'ing." Her other hand pointed a claw across the table. "Unless you've got somet'ing bettah."
Jack briefly scanned his king and ten of hearts. There's still a chance...
He eyed the currently naked long legs arachne who had elected to be the permanent dealer for this game (after losing the first round) just to his right. Her name was Sarrelki and she was almost the complete opposite of his opponent, appearance-wise. She had bright pink straight hair and six amber eyes. Her flawless ivory skin was offset by her ghostly white carapace. When Jack first saw her (when she still had clothes on) he thought she was some sort of... arachne apparition. Being able to examine her casually in the glow of the fungi from mere feet away dashed his rather fantastic notion. Although it wasn't as fantastic as one might think.
I do know a ghost personally...and isn't that a weird thought to have.
She glanced back and hovered a hand over the deck. Jack set his teeth and grimly nodded.
Sarrelki overturned the top card, a seven of spades, into the discard and placed the next card face up in the center.
He sucked in a small breath as a ten of clubs entered play.
Rikalitesh, or 'Rikal' for short, raised a eyebrow. "Sure you wan' to take dis to t'e end?" She set her elbows and crossed her enormous claws just under her chin. "Fold now and you only lose two."
As it was explained to Jack, arachne-style strip poker uses Texas hold 'em rules as a base. But instead of betting chips and cash, they bet clothes. For each stage the game advances the losers forfeit an additional garment. Consequently, these games tend to last only one or two hands. Arachne generally only wear three items or less at a time.
Jack gripped the cards in his hand a little tighter and side eyed his (also naked) girlfriend to his left. "How did you get me into this?"
Tetra raised her chin and batted her eyes innocently. "Get you into what, Jack?"
His shoulders dropped and he rotated a full glare at the obliquitous monster that he loved. "How did you get me into a strip poker game?"
Her mouth split into a wide grin. "I seem to recall that you agreed to play cards with us."
Jack gritted his teeth again. "You didn't say it was strip poker."
His topless girlfriend shrugged. "You didn't ask." The motion jostled her bare chest and briefly attracted his focus.
"Oi. Loverboy." Rikal called. "Eyes on t'e game."
Jack focused his glare at his opponent. "Next card." He bit out.
Sarrelki slid the top card off and placed it in the discard. Jack tried to hide his grief as she threw his salvation, a king of spades, away. The next card sealed his fate, a lowly two of clubs.
Jack grimaced and set down his cards. "Dammit."
"Ah." Rikal exclaimed upon examining his hand. "Went for t'e full house, eh loverboy?" She leaned over the table and leered. "Nah let's see it."
Jack held a grimace and lifted his left leg under the table. He removed his remaining sock and deposited it on the table for a scant second before his girlfriend swiped it into a sack containing all the losers forfeits.
As per the rules he proceeded to remove his belt and...his t-shirt. Rikal kept her grin as she got an eyeful of his bare chest.
"I must commend you Tetra." Sarrelki commented. "If anyone deserved to be saved from that treacherous bint..." She flicked her eyes back at the human. "It's definitely him." Tetra smiled fully and regarded her mate.
Jack grimaced harder but ignored the implication that his body made him worth saving. "Just deal."
Sarrelki gathered up the cards and began to shuffle them. "Merely a compliment Mr. Keysman." She skillfully flicked both players their new hands without reaching over the table. "I'm sure Tetra would have saved the man she loved regardless of his fitness."
She laid out the flop while expounding. "We sometimes have to settle for unfit, slovenly, undisciplined men to keep our species going." Jack blinked once as she continued. "We don't usually get emotionally attached to mates that can't withstand the bondage aspects of a long term relationship no matter how carefully we handle them."
She smirked and eyed him up again. "You're a uncommon treat for one of us Mr. Keysman." She waved a clawed hand. "It's only natural that we'd congratulate one of our own for their good fortune."
He glanced down at the table and tried to take the praise at face value.
"I'll admit that I'm showing you off here, Jack." Tetra commented shamelessly.
He snorted at her admission and shook his head. "Is that why you tricked me into this?"
She blinked and reared her head. "I..w-well. I wouldn't say I...exactly...tricked..."
Jack sighed heavily and closed his eyes. "It's alright Tetra. I'm not that angry." A devious smirk formed on his lips as he looked back up. "In point of fact, I approve."
Tetra's eyes widened at his response. "You do?"
"Oh yes." He nodded and waved a hand. "After all, Madam Jil'Tanith told me herself that she wished she had a dozen of me."
All the ladies jaws dropped. Jack held his smile.
"Hohohoho." Rikal chortled and glanced at Tetra. "Quite t'e braggart you've caught newbie."
Tetra blinked a couple times. "She...she really said that?"
Jack set his cards face-down and folded his arms. "Oh yes. She even said I'm a gift from the goddess."
Sarrelki's eyes narrowed but her lips curled up. "No way."
He raised his chin. "Ask her yourself, if you doubt me."
The ladies exchanged looks of amused shock and disbelief.
He picked his cards back up and glanced smugly at them. "Are you going to keep gawking or can we play?"
Rikal grinned and leaned forward. "Oh we are playing." She jutted her chin at the dealer. "Next card."
Sarrelki rattled her head and coughed once but complied with the request. She discarded an ace of hearts and placed an eight of clubs in the center.
Jack finally studied his hand and the community cards. His brow furrowed in a degree. Almost nothing matched. Each of the community cards bore a different suit and they were at least two positions off a proper sequence.
"What is dis garbage?" Rikal whined from across the table.
"Hmph." Tetra agreed. "Looks like it'll be a high card game."
His girlfriend's comment reminded Jack of another quirk of playing arachne style poker. One that gave him a fighting chance.
"Last card." He requested.
Sarrelki nodded and discarded a ten of clubs. Her claws placed a three of spades in the center.
He drew in a small breath and glanced at his opponent. Rikal grimaced. A silent accord compelled both players to lay their hands simultaneously. All four briefly scrutinized the field. As Tetra predicted, neither player had so much as a two pair. But they each had a face card.
"Damn..." Rikal breathed as she regarded Jack's queen of diamonds against her king of clubs.
He leaned back and exhaled softly. "You know, if we were playing standard poker that king would've been the high card."
The large breed harrumphed. "In human poker, maybe." She flicked a claw toward the floor. "But down here, kings are lower than queens."
Tetra clapped her hands together. "Congratulations Jack." He nodded appreciatively.
Sarrelki smirked at the large breed. "Come on loser, strip." Rikal mock-sneered back but didn't object. She lowered her hands and drew up her shirt.
Jack raised a finger. "You... don't have to do that." The three ladies all blinked and stared at him.
"She lost Jack." Tetra iterated. "She has to follow the rules."
Sarrelki shook her head. "Winners can't change the rules just because they won."
"I'm not-" Jack started to protest but averted his eyes toward his girlfriend. Rikal finished discarding her shirt and proceeded to remove her skirt.
"What's t'e matter Jack?" She taunted. "Too much woman for ya?"
He sighed and attempted to keep his eyes from drifting back toward – Damn those are huge-no stop!
He coughed and jerked his head away. Intimate visions whirled through his mind without any restraint or control. He adjusted his legs and swallowed.
Tetra stepped around and presented her fully nude self. "It's alright Jack." She laid a hand on his knee. "I'll help with your..." She glided her palm over his thigh and snickered. "...little problem."
Jack frowned at her not-so-subtle, and incorrect, implication. He pretended not to hear the giggles from the other two.
Her hand slid up his leg... then abruptly lifted off right before his waist. "After the tournament." She concluded.
He blinked rapidly and started forward. "After...Tournament!?"
Tetra backed a step and waved toward the other poker tables and their mostly naked players. "Well, you won. So you go on to the next round."
Jack's jaw unhinged and his eyelids lowered in egregious shock "Wat?
She smiled brightly. "I know you'll do your best."
His head hung there a moment while he processed the ridiculous scenario. "I... you..." He leaned back in his chair. "Okay." His arms folded. "Now I'm mad at you."
She folded her arms back and inclined her chin. "You said you approved Jack." All six eyes narrowed confidently.
"I..." Jack shut his jaw and glared back. Teeth bit into his lower lip. "Fine." His pointed right at her. "But you are going to owe me a big favor for this."
"So you think he'll get in trouble for this?"
Sula waved off her husband's concern. "Nah. Agent Smythe's very adept at circumventing the cumbersome aspects of the Exchange laws." Her tail curled around itself under the rec-room table.
She turned her head and regarded her three children by the games shelf as they discussed which board game to try playing with their parents.
"It's not like Jack ran out on us, like that one time." She faced back to Joseph and shrugged one shoulder. "Whatever Tetra's issue is, it's just taking longer to resolve." She nodded confidently. "He hasn't forgotten us."
Joseph shook his head. "Just seems weird, not being able to contact your host."
Sula rolled her eyes. "That's arachne paranoia at work." She took a sip of her lemonade and gazed downward. "Well, maybe paranoia is too strong a term." Her eyes unfocused as she reconsidered her words. "The point is, he's not in any danger and we'll get him back when they're done."
Joseph tilted his head and smiled lightly. "You really trust a cave full of arachne?"
She glanced up and fixed her golden gaze on him. "I trust Tetra." She lifted a claw. "If anything happens to Jack, she'll answer to me."
Her husband smirked and snorted. "Scary wife is scary."
Her fangs glinted with a grin. "Scary housemate in this case." She clarified. "She knows who really runs things around here."
He chuckled and closed his eyes briefly.
"Besides," She continued. "Agent Serilla already told us that he's considered a guest and Tetra's a full member now. Smythe has no reason to doubt their word."
He leaned back in his chair. "Alright. I suppose I'm just uncomfortable being the only man in this..." He waved an arm around in a wide motion. "...mansion."
She hummed and nodded. "Not like home." Her eyes fell again. "Not like home at all."
"...Do you miss it?"
Sula paused. "I did." A small smile grew and her fangs parted again. "But then home came to me."
"I think we got one mama." Maria slithered toward the table with two colorful boxes. Her sisters accompanied her with a pair of similar sized and even more colorful boxes in their arms.
Joseph's eyes narrowed as he scrutinized their cargo. "One?"
Priscilla placed her boxes on the end and retrieved her smartphone. "It's all part of the same game papa." She slithered around with her screen displayed. "See?"
Joseph grasped the device and quickly reviewed her findings. "Huh...interesting."
Their mother smiled. "Do you have the rules?"
Maria nodded and lifted the lid off one of hers. "I think they're in here. This one's the heaviest and I could hear something sliding around." Her claws deftly retrieved several large pamphlets. She selected the plainest looking (comparative to the others) and set it aside. "I'm positive this is the base game's rules."
Sula picked up the object and read the title aloud. "Sentinels of the Multiverse."
"Yeah!" Lissa pumped a fist. "We get to pick heroes and fight villains together."
"Hmm, sounds exciting." Joseph commented.
Maria lifted a fist. "I call the woman with all the guns!"
"I think there's one that shape-shifts into different animals." Lissa mused, a claw at her chin.
"If we get a really hard villain we might need healing." Priscilla cautioned while scanning one of the open boxes. "I should probably take a hero with good heals."
"Who do you want Papa?" Maria asked.
Joseph shrugged. "Is there a French speaking hero?"
"Yeah there is." Lissa ran a claw over and plucked a deck out of a box. "Here." Their papa reared his head in mild but pleasant surprise. It featured a ruggedly handsome blonde named Stuntman.
"Mama?" Priscilla prodded. "Who do you want?"
Sula held a claw to her chin and hummed. "Give me the strongest female hero."
Each of her daughters glanced at several remaining decks. "Fanatic is pretty strong." Lissa commented. "And there's that alien girl Skyscraper. She grows really big..."
"Oh but," Priscilla interjected. "Doesn't Legacy have a female version..."
"Yeah he does." Maria confirmed and plucked out a deck. "I think it's his daughter." She handed it over to her mother. "She shoots lasers out of her eyes."
"Ah! There you are."
Jil'Nathlee waved down her charge and scrambled up to them. "We've been waiting for you."
"Oh." Jack took a step back and turned his head askance. "We...we were just..."
"Waiting for what?" Tetra cut him off gently.
Jil'Nathlee raised a hand. "Well, dancing of course!" She pointed right at them. "You two have to dance. We can't start without you."
Jack raised a hand to question and possibly protest, but she pivoted around and skittered toward a tunnel leading to a lower level.
"Okay..." He furrowed a brow. "Not giving us a lot choice here..." His arm withered back to his side.
Tetra shook her head and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Come on Jack. It's still a party." 'For me' she didn't say.
He sighed and accepted his fate. He strode forward and followed the younger arachne. Tetra let him go and kept pace right beside him.
"You know, I realized something."
She glanced down in mild curiosity. "What's that, Jack?"
A pause. "I think I know why you like The Princess Bride so much."
The tall arachne halted. Her mate slowed and turned back to face her. She didn't say anything. She just waited for his explanation.
Jack sucked in a small breath. "You're Inigo Montoya."
The monster blinked slowly once. Her face maintained a neutral pondering. Then she lifted a hand and examined her claws.
"I did...imagine... stabbing mother and screaming in her face..." Her hand closed into a fist "The first time I saw that scene..." Another slow blink. "I nearly cheered." She nodded her head slowly. "Imagining the... satisfaction, I would feel." Her arm lowered back to her side.
"I already admitted, that I would try to kill her if I ever saw her again." She eyed her mate a moment. "Does that make me a bad person?"
Jack breathed out once and folded his arms. "If you were human, I'd say 'that makes you human'." She cocked her head. "Wanting revenge...that's natural."
A pause. "That doesn't answer my question." She stated.
He glanced up into her eyes, "I think you've already answered that." He lifted a finger. "'Intentions are immaterial' remember?"
A knuckle settled on her upper lip. A small smile creased behind her hand. "I suppose you're right."
Jack smirked up at her. "You mean that you, are right."
Her eyes narrowed and she placed both fists at her waist. "Appealing to my ego? ...dangerous."
He shrugged casually. "I can't help it, if it works."
The monster girl leaned over him and pressed her lips firmly. Jack didn't flinch. Instead, he advanced and kissed her. She didn't resist.
They broke off gently after an extended passionate moment. But Jack's eyes fell to a neutral position.
Her neck quirked at an angle. "What is it Jack?" Curious concern colored her question.
He stayed silent a spell. And then: "If you wanted...to go after her...and finish it." He faced up again. "I wouldn't stop you." There was a hardness to his eyes. A vicious cold blaze seated in the pupil. She'd seen it before.
He blinked and glanced away. "Not that I even could."
Oh Jack.
One of her shoulders drooped and she cupped his chin up with a palm. "You could stop me Jack."
He rattled his head at the absurd notion and was about to inquire further...but her lips peeled back into a knowing naughty grin.
"You know my safe word."
There was a brief moment of incomprehension... and then a laugh caught in his throat. "Hah. Ha ha, ho...really?" He shook his head in mock disbelief. "Really?"
"That's what it's for? Isn't it?" She placed that hand on his shoulder. "To keep me from going, too far?"
He lifted a finger and opened his mouth to object but, no good arguments came to mind. Instead he closed his eyes and shook his head slowly.
Jack breathed out. "Yeah. That's what it's there for."
"Are you two going to get down here?" A slightly panicky shrill called up to them. Jil'Nathlee stood just outside the tunnel exit, her arms stretched out. A pleading expression on her face.
The human dipped his head guiltily. "Sorry. We're coming now."
Tetra offered her hand. "Come on, Jack. Let's not keep my colony waiting." Jack took it and resigned himself to whatever was next.
This cavern was much better lit than Jack was expecting. The bioluminescent mushrooms were much more concentrated in clumps and more than a few fully lit chandeliers hung from the cave roof.
To his mild surprise the cave floor was smooth, finished. As he stepped onto the surface he gazed down and tried to determine the nature of what he was walking on. There were striations and knots in the...wait a minute...
"That's not rock...that's..." He glanced up at his girlfriend. "Is that laminate wood?"
She opened her mouth to reply...
"IT IS MY GREAT PLEASURE TO PRESENT." An amplified voice announced. "FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME, MISTRESS TETRA AND JACK KEYSMAN!"
Applause erupted from all around them as dozens of arachne cheered and clapped for the couple. Jack blinked rapidly and tried to locate where the louder voice had come from.
Across the cave, several torches blazed into existence and illuminating a set of five spider-ladies on a raised platform about four feet high. Two held electric guitars, one had an electric bass in her claws. The other two sat behind a drumset and a keyboard.
"WE ARE 'UNTHREADED!'" The long-legs arachne at the keyboard announced into a mic. "WELCOME TO MISTRESS TETRA'S INITIATION PARTY AND CONGRADULATIONS TO THE HAPPY COUPLE'S FIRST NIGHT. MAY THERE BE MANY MORE TO FOLLOW."
Jack was struck speechless, utterly stunned.
It wasn't until a guitar riff started playing over several speakers mounted all over the cave, that his brain started to reengage.
"Oh I love this song!" Tetra exclaimed right next to him and started dragging her mate by the arm.
"Wah! Tetra I-I don't-" He started to protest.
"Oh don't you dare look back
Just keep your eyes on me
I said you're holding back
She said shut up and dance with me
This woman is my destiny
She said oh-oh
Shut up and dance with me."
"Oh wait." He relaxed as she turned back and took his other hand. "I do know this song. It's by uh...Walk the ...something. " Tetra displayed a huge smile and harmonized with the last line of the verse.
Jack had no real idea how to dance with his seven-foot tall girlfriend but, he did have one problem not to worry about. "At least there's no chance that I'll step on your toes."
She giggled and placed her pedipalps lightly around his waist. "Just keep up Jack!"
"We were victims of the night
The chemical, physical, kryptonite
Helpless to the bass and the fading light
Oh we were bound to get together
Bound to get together."
Tetra's legs rapidly skittered and skipped about, and her arms would tug at his, yanking him around the floor. At first he floundered and nearly tripped over himself, but her pedipalps would tighten and brace his hips, keeping him from falling.
"She took my arm
I don't know how it happened
We took the floor and she said
Oh don't you dare look back
Just keep your eyes on me
I said you're holding back
She said shut up and dance with me
This woman is my destiny
She said oh-oh
Shut up and dance with me."
He tried to visually follow her legs and anticipate where he had to step next, but they were moving too fast for his eyes to keep up. He was a gamer dammit, he had excellent hand-eye coordination, not feet-eye coordination.
"A backless dress and some beat up sneaks
My discotheque Juliet teenage dream
I felt it in my chest as she looked at me
I knew we were bound to be together
Bound to be together."
Then he noticed that her hips would pivot just before she swung her abdomen in the same direction. There was maybe half a second gap, but it was enough that he could get at least one foot in place.
She took my arm
I don't know how it happened
We took the floor and she said
Oh don't you dare look back
Just keep your eyes on me
I said you're holding back
She said shut up and dance with me
This woman is my destiny
She said oh-oh
Shut up and dance with me.
Oh c'mon girl."
He managed a delayed shuffle to match with her movements for the last chorus. "I- I think I'm getting it!"
"Deep in her eyes
I think I see the future
I realize this is my last chance
She took my arm
I don't know how it happened
We took the floor and she said."
"Follow my pedipalps Jack!"
He blinked up at her face a second as the song entered a mellower bridge. He focused internally and tried to- "Oh."
Not only were her pedipalps keeping him from tipping over but she would slide one 'knee' back and the other forward. They telegraphed what direction she was pivoting and all he had to do was twist along and stay in the crux of each joint.
"Okay, okay. I get it. I get it." He closed his eyes and concentrated on the appendages over his hips, keeping his legs moving in time.
"Oh don't you dare look back
Just keep your eyes on me
I said you're holding back
She said shut up and dance with me
This woman is my destiny
She said oh-oh
Shut up and dance!"
"That's it Jack!"
He glanced back up with a big dumb grin. Her smile was just as wide. Little tears of joy sliding down her face.
"Don't you dare look back
Just keep your eyes on me
I said you're holding back
She said shut up and dance with me
This woman is my destiny
She said oh-oh
Shut up and dance with me."
Their steps finally matched with the song until Tetra pushed one of his shoulders out and lightly yanked with her other arm. Jack almost stumbled but managed to take the cue and spun out (somewhat awkwardly) away from her. At the end of her reach, she pulled back just as the music ended. He slid back in and kissed her hard.
The crowd erupted with applause. Though the happy couple hardly noticed.
"Hehehe." He pulled back a bit. "Didn't think that was gonna work."
She just pressed her eyes closed and leaned toward one of his ears. "I had a dream about this." He blinked once and froze in place. "Thank you Jack."
The band started up another lively song as the rest of the crowd skittered onto the dance floor. Jack stepped back into position and waited for her next move. She lifted his chin up with a knuckle. "No Jack, you can lead this time."
The early evening summer sun's fading rays provided just enough illumination for Verandys to wash off her trowel and spade with the garden hose without any artificial lights.
"There." She wiped one arm across her brow and trotted over to the open garage. "That's a good place to stop for today." She placed her cleaned gardening tools in the aluminum cabinet and prepared to press the garage door button. She halted when she heard an automobile slow and turn into the driveway.
"Oh. Jack might back with- huh?"
Her hope was dashed as she spotted a brown four-door sedan stop and park right outside the door. She didn't know much about human transportation vehicles, she couldn't even tell the make by the unfamiliar symbol emblazoned on the grill. She was, however, very certain that her arachne roommate could not fit comfortably, or at all, in the car that just arrived.
She blinked and stared as the driver's door opened.
An elderly male human with an only slightly receding batch of white hair exited. He sported a well-trimmed full beard and mustache. Faded hazel eyes were lined with many creases in the skin around them. Creases that seemed accustomed to smiling as much as stern scolding.
He wore a light blue button-up office shirt and a pair of black slacks with a very dark brown leather belt. Somewhat offsetting the image was a pair of white sneakers. His slight but not quite frail frame reminded Verandys of her maternal grandfather.
"H-hello miss... centaur." His voice was strong, firm. Only a hint of wavering age in the tone. "I hope it is not too much of a bother if I park here." He waved one hand back toward the driveway. "I don't like to leave my car on the curb. Even in safe neighborhoods."
Vera blinked and momentarily pondered what this strange human meant by 'safe neighborhoods'. Then she rattled her head and answered back. "I don't think it's a problem." She held up a hand. "Is there something I can help you with?"
He smiled lightly. "I hope you can. Would this be the new domicile of one Jack Clark Keysman?"
Verandys blinked at the unexpected middle name of her host. "Yes, this is the Keysman residence."
The old man bowed lightly. "Oh good. Is he home at the moment?"
Vera shook her head. "No he is not."
He sucked in a sharp breath. "Am... am I too late?" A quiver betrayed a deep fear in the old man. A fear that Vera couldn't help but sympathize with. A fear that she knew wouldn't be quelled until she saw Jack safe and sound herself.
She turned her head askance. "Too late for what?"
"I.. I need to..." The old man lifted up a hand, but then trailed off.
The centaur swallowed. "Jack should be home soon. He called us about an hour ago."
The stranger's eyes brightened back up. "He did? Oh thank the merciful Lord."
Vera tilted her head. She'd heard versions of that expression from a few humans already, but she never asked for its meaning or origin. She found it especially odd for Americans (who, to her knowledge, didn't have an official aristocracy) to acknowledge a local 'lord' for their fortunes.
She regarded him for a moment and determined that, whoever he was, he was genuinely concerned about her host's well being. "If you would like, I don't think Jack would mind if you wait in the den until he arrives." She waved toward the double doors that led to the kitchen.
"That's very kind of you." He held his hand out. "I'm Pastor Mark McKay. Retired."
Vera smiled, trotted up and clasped her hand with his. "I'm Verandys."
They let go and he asked. "Could I trouble you for a glass of water in the meantime?"
She shook her head and pivoted toward the doors. "Not at all sir. Please follow me."
A/N: Happy New Year readers.
For reference the song was "Shut Up and Dance" by Walk The Moon.
And yes, Jack is finally coming home. Arachne don't like to let things slip out of their claws hehe.
