Bella POV
Rosalie froze. I wanted to reach out and touch or hug her, or something. But I didn't. I stayed on the bed and patiently waited for her to come back to me.
I don't know how long I wanted. My head snapped up when I saw her move again. "I'm sorry Bella," she said softly. I didn't meet her eyes. "I wasn't expecting to hear that."
I finally looked up. She looked upset though I couldn't understand why. "I'm sorry," I told her.
"Don't be," she said. "It's my fault." She shifted so she could pull me against her body. She grabbed the blanket and attempted to wrap it around me so it was between our bodies to protect me from her cold skin. I gently pulled the blanket out of her hands and covered both of our bodies with it. I didn't want anything separating us. Her cold skin was a comfort. "Do you still want to hear my story? It's not a good one. Then again none of ours are good. Esme, Edward, Emmett and I, were dying when Carlisle changed us. It's one of his rules. It makes him feel less guilty."
I couldn't focus on anything she said, other than the fact that she had almost died. It was ridiculous since I already knew that. She was dead, technically, all vampires were. Yet she was here beside me, holding me in her arms. The thought of her dying was too much for me to handle.
"Bella love. I'm right here. Breathe Bella," she muttered in my ear. "I'm alive. I'm okay."
Rosalie kept talking to me, kept reassuring me she was alright. I heard some of it. The rest was like white noise. After a while I started to relax in her arms. I couldn't understand why I reacted so strongly. It was dumb, I knew that, but the panic was overwhelming.
I gripped her shirt and my knuckles grazed her stomach. The cold, hard texture of her skin was perfect in my panic. It helped calm me. I shifted so I was laying on top of her. My hands resting under her shirt, my face buried in the crook of her neck. Rosalie didn't seem to mind.
"I'm sorry," I muttered against her neck. I pressed my lips to the cold skin. She tightened her grip on me.
"It's okay. I didn't realize how strongly you would react," Rosalie whispered. "Are you sure you want to hear this?" she asked again.
I hesitated. Did I want to hear her story after all? Part of me didn't. I was afraid of what I would hear. I couldn't bring myself to say no. I loved Rosalie and I wanted to know every part of her. The good and the bad.
"Yes," I said.
I could feel Rosalie taking a deep breath, an unnecessary breath. "I was born in Rochester, New York in 1915," she began. "I was turned in 1933, during the Great Depression. My father was a banker and my family didn't suffer, but I saw the other families. I was vain and self-centered back then. I was beautiful even as a human and I liked when people noticed me. I was admired by men constantly, and the occasional woman, though it was always subtle."
I wasn't surprised to hear she was beautiful even as a human, or that men and women admired her.
"One morning my mother had me dress up to bring my father lunch at the bank," Rosalie continued. "It was strange because she usually took him his lunch. It didn't take long for me to figure out why. The banker's son, Royce King III, was there. My parents had hoped he would be interested in me and he was. He sent me violets, to match my eyes, and he courted me."
My fists clenched at the thought of Rosalie with someone else.
"It wasn't long before we were engaged. I loved the idea of marriage and having children of my own. I didn't care that I didn't love him, that I only loved the idea of him."
I could feel her arms tightening around me as she continued.
"One night I visited my best friend Vera. She'd recently had a baby boy and I wanted to see him. It was getting dark and I needed to head home. Vera's husband offered to drive me but I insisted I could walk. It was only a couple blocks away.
I could feel her shake her head.
"I was almost home when I saw Royce and three of his friends. He called me over and of course I went to him. He was drunk and wanted to show off."
I tensed up. I had a bad feeling.
"He commented on how pretty I was. He was proud of it. His friends joked that they couldn't tell because of all the clothes I wore. Royce…" she paused before continuing, "he tore off my clothes so he could see my body better. The four of them… they took turns…"
I touched her face. "You don't have to finish," I told her. I knew the ending without her saying it.
"After they were done they made jokes about Royce finding a new bride," Rosalie continued. "Carlisle found me not long after. He smelled the blood. He felt bad for me, for how my life was taken from me. He wanted to help though at the time I thought he wanted to hurt me too. He changed me. Back then we wanted me to be for Edward what Esme was for him. It didn't take long for him to realize that would never happen."
"I'm glad changed you," I said softly. It was selfish to say so but I was glad she was here. "What happened to them?" I hoped they suffered.
"I killed them all," Rosalie said. "I saved Royce for last. I stole a wedding dress and wore it. I was bit theatrical back then. The things I did to them…" She shook her head. "I never spilled a drop of their blood but I made their deaths as painful as possible."
"Good," I said darkly. They deserved to suffer for what they did to Rose, my Rose. "Bella love, you're going to hurt yourself," Rose warned.
She gently pried my hand from her shirt. I'm surprised the fabric didn't rip in my hands. If I was a vampire it would have. "Sorry," I muttered relaxing my hand.
"If you want to rip off my clothes all you have to do is ask," she joked.
"How can you even think like that?" I asked. I thought back to earlier in the day when I was grinding against her. I felt horrified by what I had done. "And earlier…I… you…" I couldn't talk. I was panicking. How did she not hate me?
"Bella." I could hear her but I couldn't focus on her voice. "Bella… Bella," Rosalie shouted this time. I glanced at her face. "I want you to listen to me, okay?" I nodded. "You did not do anything that I didn't want. Do you understand?" I nodded again. "I love you and I want you but that wasn't the right time. For one, it's cold outside and you would have froze."
"I…" I didn't know what to say. I felt guilty.
"I love you Bella," she repeated. "Don't feel guilty. I promise, you did nothing wrong."
I pushed myself up so I could kiss her. She held me close. Her fingers were running through my hair. This had nothing to do with sex or lust. It was about love. I don't know why it took so long for me to realize it. Had Jasper known I loved her, was in love with her? If he did, he never said anything. Same with Alice.
I pulled away from Rosalie. Her eyes were dark, almost black. Part of it was lust but the other part was hunger. I touched the dark circles under her eyes. How long had it been since she hunted? Weeks? I didn't know.
"You need to hunt," I muttered. I wasn't afraid. I've never been afraid of her. Even when she was this hungry.
"I'll hunt later," she said, holding my hand against her face.
"Rose," I sighed. I didn't want her to hurt because of me.
"When you go to sleep," she promised.
I kissed her. "Should I move?" I tried to get off the bed, although I would rather her kill me then move. But I didn't want to make her uncomfortable.
"Silly Bella," she said. "Your blood holds no temptation for me."
"Why haven't you hunted?" I asked her. I didn't want her to suffer. Even if I wasn't a temptation for her, she had to feel the thirst.
Rosalie shrugged. "I honestly didn't think about it. I wanted to be with you. Hunting was the last thing on my mind."
"Promise me you'll hunt when I'm asleep," I told her.
She leaned forward and kissed me. "I promise. Do you want Alice or Jasper to stay with you while you sleep?"
I bit my lip. "Can Emmett stay?" I was still a little nervous around Edward. I knew he wouldn't hurt me but if something were to happen, I wanted someone like Emmett to be there. Besides Alice and Jasper needed to spend time together.
"Of course love," Rosalie said. "You should go to sleep love. It's late."
I leaned against Rosalie, enjoying the comfort of her body. I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.
I knew this was a dream. For one I was looking at a very human Rosalie, dressed in clothes I had never seen her wear before. Her beautiful violet eyes were full of fear.
Four men surrounded her. I didn't know who they were, only that one of them had to be Royce. I growled as he grabbed her.
I ran forward to try to save her. But no matter how fast I ran I could never get to them.
"Can't see anything with all those clothes," one the men grunted.
I screamed for Rosalie as her clothes were ripped off.
"Rose, Rose… Rose, no," I screamed.
"Bella," I could hear Emmett's voice but it wasn't registering. I was trapped in my nightmare, watching them hurt my Rose. "Jasper."
There was movement and I could feel cold hands locking my wrists down at my side. "Bella, we need you to wake up," Jasper muttered. "Em, you need to get Rose now."
I was half-awake but I couldn't open my eyes. I was barely aware of my surroundings. I was locked in those horrifying thoughts. I thrashed around in the bed. My hands were pinned but the rest of me wasn't. Moments later I felt my legs behind pinned under strong thighs. My body was pressed against a hard, male body. Jasper had shifted underneath me so he could keep me from hurting myself.
"Jasper, what's…" It was Rose. She was back.
"You need to wake her," he said gruffly. "This was the only think I could do to keep her from clawing herself."
"Bella," Rosalie said softly. I felt the bed dip. I wanted to open my eyes. I wanted to come back to the present, to feel Rosalie's arms around me. But I couldn't. I was afraid all I would see is those images of those men hurting her. "Jazz let her go."
"Rose…" he began.
"Let her go," Rosalie repeated. Jasper released me and I suddenly found myself against a far more comfortable body. "Bella, I need you to wake up. I am right here love." She took my hand and placed it against her chest. There was no heartbeat but it was enough to get me to open my eyes.
"Rose," I breathed. She was here in front of me. Her eyes were bright gold. At least she was able to hunt.
"What happened Bella?" she asked concerned. She touched my face and I felt a sting. "You scratched yourself, not enough to draw blood but there's definitely a mark."
I glanced at Jasper. He was no longer on the bed but hovering by the door, waiting to see what would happen. "I'll be outside if you need me," he said leaving the room.
I turned my attention back to Rosalie. "I had a nightmare," I said embarrassed. "They hurt you and I tried to get to you but I couldn't reach you."
"Oh Bella," Rosalie said sadly. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have told you."
I shook my head. "Don't be sorry. I'm glad you told me. I like knowing about you, even the bad stuff. I… I love you Rose."
