As he scrambled through the window to get on the balcony Chandler realized – rather belatedly if not too late – that he should have put on a coat. Not just because it was freezing outside, but if he had put on his coat he could have put the phone in a pocket. Now he had to hold it in his hand while he was clambering and twisting his way out without dropping it or tearing his pants. Or both.
At last it was done, and all in good time too, there were still about ten minutes to go until midnight. Behind him apartment #20 was dark and quiet since the New Year's party was at his and Joey's place this time. Rachel had left after Christmas to visit her parents and Monica was still at work – she still seemed to cling to her delusion that working double shifts at her new job would finally get those jerks of her coworkers to stop hating her. So the coast was clear. Now if only the phone network wasn't too overloaded yet… With his fingers already stiffening from the cold he hit the redial button and held his breath. For what seemed like an eternity the phone was silent as if his call had gone out into a cold black void, forever searching its connection, reaching out across the distance … only to be terminated abruptly with the hectic, unforgiving busy signal. Again. Chandler swore and clenched his fist.
"Can't get through?" Monica asked from the corner of the balcony behind him and Chandler nearly jumped out of his skin, dropping the phone and fumbling it for what seemed like an eternity until he had retained his grasp on it again. Panting he turned around.
"You! You - - uh, um, startled me! What are you doing here?! I thought you were at work!"
"No. The boss sent everybody home at eleven."
"Then why aren't you at the party?" Monica just shrugged, her face shut and Chandler sighed.
"Aw. Are you still upset because they all hate you at work? I thought you'd fixed that with Joey!"
"No. Now they hate me because I fired Joey." Monica said listlessly. "But it's okay, don't worry about me. I'm too tired for the party. I just wanted to watch the fireworks – you know, see the New Year in and then go to bed."
"Aw. That is so –" Searching for the right word Chandler stepped closer to her. "I don't know. Wrong? Shouldn't you at least be with the others at the countdown?"
"Why? You're not at the party either." Monica indicated the phone in his hand. "Are you trying to call Kathy?"
"Yeah. Oh, I almost forgot –" He hit the redial button once more and swore when he got a busy signal again. Monica clucked sympathetically.
"Damn, I knew I should have started earlier! Now she's waiting for my call and I just can't get through!"
"Maybe she's talking to someone else …" Monica offered.
"No, it's the network. It's overloaded. Everybody's calling everybody else." Clenching his teeth Chandler tried again. And again. And again.
"Can I try?" Monica held out her hand and after a moment's hesitation he let go of the phone and started to rub his hands in a futile attempt to warm them. Monica pushed the redial button and put the phone to her ear, but only for a short moment, then she held it out again.
"Here you go," she said calmly and when he could only gape at her "Come on! The call is going through!"
"But how – when – how did you – oh my god, you did it!" When she thrust the phone at him he pressed it against his ear, still unbelieving. But she was right, there was the ringtone going through. Ringing … ringing … still ringing …
"She's not taking it! Why doesn't she take the call?"
Monica shrugged. "Maybe she can't hear it?"
Then suddenly there was a tinny, far away voice at the other end, against a background of multiple chattering and laughter. Chandler clamped his hand over his other ear and hunched his shoulders to hear it better.
"Hello? Kathy?"
"Who is this?" This didn't sound like her voice, even with all the party noises.
"It's me! Chandler! Kathy? Is that you?" He only realized that he was yelling when Monica winced. It didn't seem to do much for his efforts to make himself understood either.
"Who?"
"Kathy, are you Kathy?" He saw Monica looking at him curiously.
"I'm not Kathy ..." The tinny voice informed him amidst giggles.
"But this is Kathy's number … Isn't it?" How could he have screwed this up? Had he made a mistake with the number? But they had tried it out earlier and it had worked. It had worked!
"Kathy's left. She gave me her phone so I could call my folks. But I can't get through!" the voice wailed.
"What? Why?"
"The busy signal all the time, that's why. Maybe if I texted them?"
"I mean Kathy, why did she leave? Where is she?"
"I don't know! She went with Nick. I'd like to try again, it's almost midnight –"
"With Nick?!" Chandler froze, his mouth hanging open. "But … but..."
"Whatever. I'm hanging up now. Happy New Year, whoever you are."
"But … yeah, you too …" But she had already hung up. Chandler stared at the phone dejectedly, feeling as if he was rooted to the spot.
"Chandler? What's wrong? Who did you talk too?"
"I don't know … oh, a friend of hers I guess. From her acting class. Or the play she's in –", Chandler swallowed hard. "Kathy gave her the phone. Before she left. With Nick."
"Who's Nick?"
He shrugged. "The lead actor. Her partner in the play. I think."
"And she left with him? Why?"
"How should I know?" Only when she drew back he realized that he had yelled at her and wanted to kick himself. "Sorry. I didn't mean to – oh god, this is so screwed up."
"Maybe she realized you wouldn't get through to her cell and now she's trying to call you on the land line?"
"No." Chandler closed his eyes in resignation. "It was my idea. She doesn't know – I wanted to surprise her." He looked at the phone in his hand and then stuffed it into his pocket. "I should have known. Nothing good comes from my surprises."
"Oh don't say that." Monica put a hand on his arm. "I think it was a great idea."
"Yeah, and look what it got me. A big fat surprise." Chandler winced. "If I hadn't tried to call her, I would at least believe I still had a girlfriend."
"Of course you still have a girlfriend! This might not be what you think it is! There could be another explanation!"
"Oh yeah? When she's with Nick? He of the seven feet, shirtpoking pecs and jolly laughs?"
"Chandler! At least wait until you can talk with her before –"
"Before what? Ditching her?" She only looked at him reproachfully and he sighed. "But you're right. I'll talk to her when she gets back. If she comes back."
"Chandler!"
"I know. I shouldn't take it out on you. It's just … If I can't be with her when the New Year starts I want to at least talk to her on the phone."
Monica put an arm around him. "I'm sorry you can't be with your girlfriend now. But at least you have a girlfriend. I've got no one."
"You don't have a girlfriend?!"
Glaring at him she punched him on the ribs. "Stop it!"
"Okay. But apparently I don't have a girlfriend anymore."
"You don't know that!" Now she glared at him. "Don't get out your sweatpants yet!"
Chandler sighed deeply. "You're right. So, if you don't have a boyfriend and I don't have a girlfriend, and the New Year is about to start …"
"… and?"
Feeling her expectant gaze on him he started to mumble. "Well … there's nobody else … and it's almost time … and … I mean, do you just want to leave it like that?"
"What else?"
For a long moment he hesitated, torn between his anguish over his lost hopes and his practical sense, feeling colder every moment he spent there on the balcony.
"I think we should go back to the party" he said at length. "You know, join the countdown … have a toast with the others …"
Monica's face clouded. "Maybe. But I don't feel like it."
"Oh come on! It can't be that bad." He looked closer at her, suddenly alarmed. "Is it?"
Monica winced. "No. It's okay. It's not the end of the world. There will always be another New Year's Eve, won't there? Who knows maybe I'll get lucky next time! And someone to kiss at midnight on New Year's Eve."
"Oh, is that what's it all about? Kiss someone at midnight?"
She squirmed. "Well … not quite like that … but …"
"I know. And of course you will. Get a boyfriend. And kiss someone at midnight. I'm sure you will have a boyfriend next year at this time."
"And if not?"
"But you will! You're bound to! It's inevitable! Because you're … you're Monica! You deserve it! Much more than I deserve to have a girlfriend. And if I can get a girlfriend, you will have a boyfriend too!"
"But you just said you don't have a girlfriend …" she pointed out. Then her shoulders slumped.
"It's okay. You're right. I'm just … depressed, that's all."
Her expression seemed so sad and, even worse, resigned, he felt the all-encompassing need to help her at all costs. Monica resigned? Giving up? Crawling into a corner? It didn't bear thinking, so Chandler frantically started to wreck his brain for something to cheer her up.
"You know, I want that too. To kiss someone at midnight. So why don't we make a pact? Right here and now."
Her eyebrows rose. "A pact? About what?"
"To kiss at midnight." When she drew back, frowning, he grasped at her arms. "No, hear me out! If you and I, if both of us are single at next New Year's Eve, we will kiss each other at midnight." He gulped at her quizzical expression. "As friends. As each other's back-up. Purely as friends, for good luck."
For a long moment she continued to look at him searchingly, then she smiled.
"A back-up? For a kiss at midnight? Oh my!"
"Yes! We'll call it the balcony back-up. In one year at this time we will …" he swallowed again. "… kiss. Here if you like. Or wherever you like."
Her smile widened. "You'd do that for me? That's so sweet!"
"Really? Oh, that's such a relief."
"What?"
"I thought, you'd trot out that 'why will I still be single in one year' again. Or 'you're very sweet, but you'll always be the guy who peed –"
"Stop it! Ugh! You're ruining it!"
Chandler pulled himself together. "So it's a deal?"
She frowned. "Deal? I'd prefer promise. But are you sure?"
"Me? Of course I am. Of course, Joey won't be too pleased when he hears about it, but…"
"Joey? Why?"
"Remember how he kissed me at midnight three years back? Yeah, he's been my back-up ever since. Not that he's ever kissed me again, but there's always next year …"
"He's not here now either."
Chandler glanced at his watch. "Yeah, he likes to cut it close. There's still a minute to go though. Oh, is that the countdown? Aw, look, Ugly Naked Guy's got the TV on!"
From where they were standing at the railing they could see the TV screen in Ugly Naked Guy's living room where the countdown had started. All around the yard between the buildings voices were raised in chorus repeating the numbers as the last minute before midnight expired.
"Forty-one! Forty! Thirty-nine!"
Chandler put an arm around Monica and smiled.
"So in one year ..."
She smiled back. "Yes. But shouldn't we – you know, seal it? The pact?"
"You mean, like shake on it?"
"More like, well, implement it." Now she moved closer. "With a trial run …"
He swallowed nervously, not sure where she was going, or even if she was going somewhere. In the distance the countdown continued.
"Twenty-seven! Twenty-six! Twenty-five!"
"A trial run?" he repeated vaguely. "What, you mean like – now? But …"
Still holding his gaze she nodded. Definitely nodded. And then drew even closer, putting her hands on his chest and working her fingers under the lapels of his blazer.
"Just as friends. For luck. Because I really, really, really could do with some good luck right now." She gestured vaguely around. "The last time I kissed someone here really ended horribly." When he looked blank, she shrugged impatiently. "You know, Timothy? Richard's son?"
"Oh. That was here? Well, I never met the guy. Because I was living in a box? But I believe you."
"And I really don't want that to be my last kiss here any longer."
"Fifteen! Fourteen! Thirteen!"
"Alright. Okay." When her eyes lit up and she smiled, his heart seemed to miss a beat. "Okay, I'll kiss you. I'm only doing it for good luck though. Oh, and before I forget, this is only for us. You can't pass this kiss on to Rachel or Phoebe if you change your mind. Or even Joey."
"Eight! Seven! Six!"
Somehow she managed to keep a straight face. "I won't. I promise."
"Then okay." He lowered his head a bit until their noses were almost touching and he could feel her breath on his cheek. It fairly made his head swim.
"Four! Three! Two!"
"Ugh, and no tongue, right?!"
"One! Happy New Year!"
Dimly he felt her kicking him, just a split second before their lips met and pressed together. Then they were doing it, they were kissing, he was kissing Monica, his friend and neighbor for almost seven years (somehow the phrase seventh time lucky kept reverberating in his brain over and over), who'd kept starring in his deepest darkest fantasies ever since he'd watched her come down the stairs in that amazing dark red clinging dress, after her metamorphosis from the caterpillar of an overweight awkward teenager to the butterfly of a hot, radiantly beautiful woman. Passionate, energetic to the point of all-out obsession, with a tongue almost as scathing as his, neurotic, determined, tireless, enervating, neat-freaked, anal, warmhearted, kind and always soooo hot Monica. It couldn't be real, and yet it was. Actually it felt as if time had stood still at the very moment of midnight, forming a bubble of timelessness around them where reality had no meaning, where nothing counted except that they were kissing each other. For luck, for friendship, for the merging of two lonely imperfect souls who had kept searching for and never found each other except here in this fragile shimmering bubble of a moment in time, to become one – if only for that one little moment.
Or rather these little moments. Chandler thought he had closed his eyes when their lips touched but now he realized that he could still see. See, and marvel at what he saw.
He saw himself and Monica kissing, not once, not now, but many more other times in different places, each one ensconced in its own shimmering timeless bubble that preserved that one moment of their midnight kiss forever in that dark space where time and reality had no meaning. There seemed to be uncountable versions of the two of them – he saw one where Monica was wearing a gorgeous clingy shoulder-free dress with silver sequins all over it as she curled her fingers around the lapels of his dark green coat, then there was another where she was wearing short blue pajamas and nothing else, in yet another they were somewhere outside in the middle of a crowd of cheering excited people, their breath steaming white from the cold as their lips touched. He still had his goatee in that one. He thought he recognized the hallway between their apartments in one and her apartment door with the mirror frame around the spyhole in another. In some he had his arms around her, in others he was cupping her head in his hands. And in all of them their bodies were drawing close until they seemed to melt into each other, becoming one in their never-ending midnight kiss. And now all those bubbles were swirling around them, faster and faster until they became a blur, a streak of colors and flashes, like fireworks, dissolving into a vortex of light, so bright he had to squint as he opened his eyes – for real this time. He only realized that it was for real when he heard the fireworks going off somewhere high above their heads and saw the explosion of colorful lights reflected in Monica's eyes. He was still holding her by her shoulders, but the kiss had ended. The moment had passed – again, this year's bubble joining the others in their eternal timeless floating...
"Happy New Year, Chandler" Monica whispered, her smile seeming to light up her face.
"Happy New Year, Monica" he replied hoarsely, his voice sounding strange to his ears. He still felt numb from what he had seen and what it meant. Had they really been kissing each other once every year? How could he have forgotten that?
"Did … did you see it too?" he stammered at last and her smile widened as she nodded.
"But … how? And why?"
"Shshsh …" now she put her hands to his face. "It doesn't matter. It doesn't count."
"So it's not real?"
"It's real if you want it to be real." She gently drew his head down until the tips of their noses touched, their lips almost brushing against each other. He felt her warm breath wafting over his cheeks as she spoke.
"Do you? Want it to be real?"
Chandler gulped, trying to rid himself of the lump that seemed to have lodged itself in his throat.
"I wish I could." For a long moment she held his gaze and he felt despair rising in him like a dark freezing flood. Then their foreheads bumped gently as she closed her eyes and leaned against him.
"I know."
"It would be… like what Ross did to Rachel. I'm definitely not Ross. And you –"
"I'm definitely not that copy shop girl."
Was that a smile? The ghost of a smile perhaps, flickering at the corner of her mouth. "You're right. It would be cheating even if it wasn't. Even if it didn't count, wasn't real. It still would feel like cheating."
He thought about Kathy as she had been earlier that day – the day before rather, before she had left for work. The theatre company she worked for had staged a New Year's event where she had to participate, on the stage until long past midnight. She couldn't help it, it was her job after all. Her livelihood, and he hadn't wanted to interfere with that. It was an essential part of her and he had accepted that already before they finally got together. Finally after they had both cheated on Joey, and for all the wrong reasons too. It would have been so easy to tell Joey the truth at once and upfront, but instead he had avoided the confrontation, choosing to pine for her and go behind his best friend's back instead. Cheating. As she had, then, and maybe now too, and on him. Maybe. But maybe not.
Slowly he raised his hands from her shoulders and put them over hers, closing his fingers around her wrists.
"But we'll always have Paris" he said, grinning when she frowned.
"Paris?"
"Or London? I like London. And oh, I meant our pact. The balcony back-up. That's still on, is it?"
The relief on her face was almost palpable. "Oooh, yes! Definitely!" Now she twinkled.
"So in one year from now, if we're both single … we will kiss at midnight."
"For luck."
"For luck" she agreed and her expression softened. "Thank you."
"For what? It's I who should thank –"
"For kissing me this time. Even though you still have a girlfriend." Her eyes were shining. "This year will be lucky, for both of us. I'm sure of it. This year will be the one. 1998. You'll see!"
He took a deep breath, suddenly almost giddy with relief, the happiness bubbling over in his mind.
"You're sure it was enough though? One kiss? Without tongue even? Ouch!"
.
.
"Chandler! Chaaaanndler! Wakey-wakey!"
He tried to open his eyes, but they seemed somehow stuck, as if someone had gummed them together. Which was probably just as well as the little bit of light that did get through hurt like blazes, even after he squeezed them shut again.
"Ooommph … hum? Wha- - Mon?" No, that was the wrong name. Oh god, now he'd done it, like Joey he couldn't remember her name, the name of his girlfriend who was still shaking him by the shoulder and brushing her lips over his face –
"Mom? I'm not your mom!" Now she gently pushed up his eyelids with her fingertips and laughed softly when he finally focused on her. "Must have been some party last night!"
"Ka – Kathy?!" Oh the blessed relief, although it was immediately followed by a new worry.
"What are you doing here?" 'Here' being his bedroom where he was lying in his bed, practically naked too – at least his modesty almost hysterically insisted that he was even though he was still in his boxers and t-shirt.
She laughed again, in a way that felt a little forced to him, though he was prepared to chalk it up to his headache. And the horrible taste in his mouth. Not to forget the ringing in his ears, or even more important, his parched throat.
"Oh, I don't have to be at the theatre until three" she said. "So I thought I'd come over and see how you were doing." Now she got serious. "And wish you a happy New Year."
"Oh… right. Yeah, happy New Year to you too."
"You poor sweetie." Now she drew closer, cupping his head in her hands. "I'm sorry I couldn't be here yesterday. I hope you still had some fun!"
"Mmmh … Not really. Although Phoebe's brother fell into the punchbowl." He winced at the memory. "Twice."
Kathy giggled. "Wow! I really wish I'd been here. It was so dull at the event."
"Is that why you left early?"
"What? I didn't leave. I couldn't. Why –"
"It's just that I tried to call you at midnight and –"
"Call me? How?"
"On your cell, only I couldn't get through and –"
"What cell? I don't have a cell phone." Now she stared at him in total confusion and all at once Chandler felt reality rearrange itself in his head, and none too gently either. In fact it hurt like hell.
"Um … never mind. It must have been – I guess it was a dream. Oh god." He had tried to sit up and immediately wished he hadn't.
Kathy looked relieved. "A dream? You dreamed about me? That's so sweet!" She held him close, ruffling through his hair and Chandler closed his eyes again as he pressed his face against her shoulder. She smelled amazing, of some fruity/nutty shampoo and a very light fragrance that he couldn't put a name to.
"So, at three? What time is it anyway?"
"Half past two." She winced at his woeful expression. "I'm sorry I couldn't get here earlier, but you were still asleep anyway. But hey, it could be worse! At least you were at the party. Joey just told me that Monica had to work too. That is, she could have gone home, but she got so caught up with cleaning the kitchen that she never noticed when it was midnight!"
"Cleaning into the New Year? Yeah … sounds like her alright." Somewhere behind all that dull hammering and buzzing in his head a thought or a memory weakly tried to get his attention and failed, dissolving in the hot pounding darkness again. Something with Monica, and a … back-up? But he didn't need a back-up. Not anymore. He had a girlfriend. True, they hadn't done it yet, there had never been a good time somehow, but it was only a matter of time, wasn't it? And now they had a whole new year before them.
As if to echo his thoughts Kathy nestled closer, rubbing over his back and sliding her hand under his t-shirt. "And I'll make it up to you. In a few more days I've got a week off! We can be together then!"
"Wow! A whole week! Why, in one week we could – do a lot of stuff!"
Her eyes sparkled. "And there's always next New Year's Eve."
"So there is" he agreed. "We'll always have that."
.
.
A/N I'm not 100% sure yet, but I guess this could very well be the last of my Happy New Year chapters. Since Chandler and Monica get together in 1998 (which also means that next year will see the 20th anniversary of the London episodes – woohoo!) there's no point in these little scenarios because the goal has been achieved. If you haven't read it already you can find the description of their first "real" New Year's Eve kiss in chapter 22 'Secret New Year Kiss' of my story 'Stuck on London Time'. However I have toyed with some ideas for other Happy New Year stories set in a different time – like maybe 1988, the year of the toe-cutting, which would fit nicely since we get a 30 year anniversary here – but it's all very vague still. I guess it's just as well that I'll now have one whole year to think about it, and anything can happen in one year, right?!
All this notwithstanding I'd like to thank everybody who read, favorited, followed, reviewed and best of all liked these stories and kept encouraging and supporting me all through the last four years (how can it have been this long already?!) and wish all of you out there in the Friends fandom a wonderful, exciting, successful, healthy and above all HAPPY New Year!
