Chapter Nineteen – 'Five Dollar Buffet'

"Can I go with you?" Brandine asked as her and Comic Book Guy stretched out on the river bank.

"I don't think you can." He answered. "But this game doesn't seem to have many defined rules."

Brandine thought for a minute. "Well, in that case, why couldn't you just stay here with me?" She suggested this in hopes that he would stay.

"I think I have to go when it is my turn." He answered again. "When this game is over, I'm sure I can come back. Or maybe if I win, I can take you with me."

"That would be great. Take me where? Are you sure you can't come back and visit?" Brandine asked more questions hoping for a favorable response. "There is a good possibility that you will come back to visit me here on the farm."

Comic Book Guy sat up when he heard this. "What is your theory to confirm this?"

"Well..." Brandine sat up too. "There are only forty spaces in your game. So if you just count them every time you move, you should have an idea of when you will be back." Brandine smiled at him when she said this. "I would love for you to come back and visit me. Maybe you can get the sea-captain's space and we can see what the farm on the other side of the road contains."

"That sounds like a plan." Comic Book Guy agreed with her and stood up to make his plan sound more powerful. "I shall count every space. This is the third space and there are forty total. Sounds like simple math." He smiled at her as he continued to voice his plan. "I will also do whatever it takes to own the houseboat by the dock. Future expansion plans are always a possibility."

"That's the spirit." Brandine stood up and cheered as she noticed the MyPad had just lit up. "Is that a sign it's time to go?"

"What sign?" Comic Book Guy asked as Brandine grabbed the MyPad and held it up. "Oh that. I guess it is time for me to leave."

"Can I push the button?" She asked. "Please. Just for good luck."

"I don't know that you can..." Comic Book Guy started to say, but could not be heard because of several loud booms overhead.

Brandine stared at the MyPad as the dice displayed a six. "I guess I can press the button." She handed the MyPad back to Comic Book Guy. "You might need this on your journey. Shall we head back toward the road?"

"I guess anyone can use the MyPad." Comic book Guy commented. "That's strange. I would have thought that only the players can use the MyPads."

"Why do you think that is strange?" Brandine asked. "Does that mean..."

"Possibly." Comic Book Guy finished. "So what prevents someone else from taking my turn for me?"

Brandine looked down the road then back at Comic Book Guy. "Well, on this space is the fact that I'm the only other person."

He laughed as they both started down the dirt road back towards the silver wheelbarrow. The sky had changed to a slightly darker shade as night started to ascend across the landscape. As they passed the inaccessible farm-house, Comic Book Guy turned his head. "When I come back, I'll show you around there. I promise." He said to himself as he started to formulate a plan.

They passed the farm-house and the tomacco field before seeing their destination of the main road and walked up to the wheelbarrow parked there. "I want to try something really quick." Brandine said as she climbed inside the wheelbarrow. "Quick, hand me that thing." She said as she pointed at the MyPad. "Is anything supposed to happen?"

"I'm usually sitting in it when I press the button." Comic Book Guy explained. "Then I hear loud booms, or the fireworks you thought they were."

Brandine blushed as she heard this. "I was hoping it was fireworks. You know what they say about meeting someone and seeing fireworks in the same night."

"Yes." Comic Book Guy agreed. "Something magical may happen."

Brandine looked behind Comic Book Guy. "I think I found your magical happening." She said as he turned around to be face to face with a blue holographic Burns. "Is that normal?" She asked.

"I don't know." He answered. "I thought they were green. The one in the tomacco field was green." He stared at the hologram a second before it spoke.

"Rule violation." The blue hologram said. "You are being informed of a rule violation. Rule 39b states: An assigned mayor of a space may not participate in the game. Please dismount the wheelbarrow."

"I guess I better listen." Brandine said as she hopped out of the wheelbarrow. "You may need this back too." She handed the MyPad to Comic Book Guy. The blue hologram disappeared as fast as it had appeared.

"That does seem odd." Comic Book Guy said as he took a last look at Brandine. "You can press the button, but you can't ride the wheelbarrow. It said mayors can't play." He thought for a second, if only to delay getting in the wheelbarrow. "Maybe next time I come back, you won't be mayor."

"But I'm the only one here." She answered him.

"Maybe not." He hopefully said. "I should jump in and continue the game so there is a next time. Until next time Brandine."

"Come back when you can. I'll be here." Brandine said as she started to wave.

Comic Book Guy jumped into the wheelbarrow and it started to move down the road. "I promise I'll be back." He waved as Brandine shrank out of sight.

The wheelbarrow continued down the road as Comic Book Guy admired the scenery. It passed the first dirt road after Baltic Avenue, but turned down the second dirt road on the right.

"What's this?" He questioned excitedly. "This direction leads to the river. Maybe I rolled the correct number to visit the houseboat of the sea-captain." His excitement grew as the river once again came into sight. "I can see the river." He tried to stand up in the wheelbarrow, then realized how bad of an idea that would be.

The river came closer and as the wheelbarrow looked like it was going to drive straight into it, it made a quick sharp left and continued down the riverbank.

"I don't see the houseboat." He said as he put his hand to his forehead to try to see farther. "I guess I'll just ride and see where it goes."

He continued down the bank, until he arrived at a populated area around a dock sticking into the river.

"There aren't any houseboats, but it looks like something is here." He said as the wheelbarrow slowed down and parked along the river bank just before the dock started.

"You have arrived at Connecticut Avenue." The MyPad announced and showed the six spaces he had traveled before the screen went blank.

"I better keep track of this." He thought. "Three plus six equals nine. Thirty-four spaces to get back to where I was." The thought lingered for a second before he focused on the task at hand.

He took a quick look around to try to figure out where he was. It was a dock that extended into the river, just not the dock he had hoped it would be. He jumped out of the wheelbarrow and started the short walk to the beginning of the dock.

"Connecticut Avenue." He said as he looked at the arch that stretched over the beginning of the dock. "Baltic Avenue was a dirt road, and now Connecticut Avenue is a wooden walkway. Neither of these meet the definition of an avenue. No cars, no pavement, and no median." He said with a slight attitude. "Who came up with these names?"

Comic Book Guy walked under the arch and stopped for a second to get a better look, however his view was obscured by a large light blue anchor. He approached it and noticed a large 'For Sale' sign hanging from the top.

"I would assume that the property is for sale just like the last one, but I could be wrong and only the anchor is for sale." He said to himself as several people passed by him. "This dock doesn't look too large, so let me start exploring it and see what is here." He stepped around the anchor and noticed a large influx of people entering a store.

He took a few more steps and had several people bump him along the way toward that store until he noticed what it was. "Is that what I think it is?" He said as several kids ran past him. "It is. It looks like a movie memorabilia store and a toy store put together." His eyes got wider as he picked up the pace to get there.

Outside the store were large displays of toys that matched the large black cat with big cartoonish eyes. "That looks really familiar." But the closer he looked at it, the more different it appeared. "It looks like Itchy, but it doesn't." He looked across the entrance and noticed the cat's counterpart was standing there too. "The other should be Scratchy the Mouse, but it's not. It's a dog." A large brown dog with cartoonish eyes was standing there staring at the cat. "I guess it's fine. Cats and dogs fight like... well cats and dogs."

He shrugged as he entered the store, but didn't get very far because it was crowded. Too crowded to turn around and look at anything without bumping into someone. "Excuse me." He called out loud. "Does anyone know where I can find a stone statue of an old man?"

The answer was almost deafening as everyone tried to talk at once. "Yes! Pick me." Someone shouted from deep inside the store. "I'm standing right next to it. If you just follow my voice."

"Oh. I see it." Comic Book Guy said as he excused his way through the crowd. "Thank you young man. You have made my mission easier than I could have imagined."

The boy tried to run out of the store, but couldn't with all the people. "Wonder what his hurry is?" Another patron mentioned.

"Beats me. Now let me see." Comic Book Guy said as he stood in front of a stone Burns statue at the back of the store. "It should be easy to complete my mission here, all I have to go is place..." He said as he placed the MyPad in the statue's hands.

But nothing happened.

Comic Book Guy waited a few seconds and still nothing happened. "Where is the hologram for me to buy something." He said as several people turned to look at him with confused looks. He stared at it and still nothing happened. "Worst... Burns statue... ever." He said before grabbing the MyPad from the statue. "Excuse me again everyone. Does anyone know why this statue doesn't work. Is anyone in charge here?"

"I am." A voice announced from the entrance to the store. "If you come here I can take you to the real statue."

"Real statue?" Comic Book Guy questioned. "Isn't that an oxymoron?"

"Yeah, but if you want to keep trying on the broken statue, be my guest." The voice said.

"I recognize that voice." He said. "Especially the thick accent. Excuse me everyone. I must meet someone important at the front of the store." As he made his way past the last shelf of toys, he recognized the voice and the face. "Rainier Wolfcastle. I thought it sounded like you."

"How do you know me? I don't know you." Rainier asked. "You seem to know a lot about me."

"You are a world-famous actor." Comic Book Guy excitedly said. "All of the McBain movies and... other movies with lots of action."

"You must be a big fan of those movies." Rainier said. "I've seen those movies too many times to count. I really enjoy being in them. Makes me feel macho."

"If I may ask a question..." Comic Book Guy started. "When is the next McBain movie coming out?"

"There aren't anymore." Rainier said much to the disappointment of everyone standing around him. "I'm sorry everyone, but that series ended after the seventh movie. After that I was given the chance to get into politics. I became the mayor of this dock." He pointed to the giant anchor. "That anchor represents my career." He turned and pointed to the big lighted building at the end of the dock. "But now I am the mayor of that Planet Hype, mainly because it is a living museum to me."

"Sounds like a fun place to see movie props. Is there actually anything interesting in there." Comic Book Guy sarcastically said. "If that anchor represents your movie career..."

"It was golden like my career, not heavy and sinks like a rock." Rainier explained, but no one laughed. "It changed to light blue yesterday, and is a sad reminder of the evil plots I ruined with the help of the men in light blue. Anyways, the real statue you want to see is in the Planet Hype. This one is the original that doesn't work."

Comic Book Guy said as he rolled his eyes. "What's wrong with it?"

"When testing, the purple hologram did not appear." Rainier said and captured everyone's attention.

"Purple?" Comic Book Guy questioned. "What does the purple one do? I've seen blue and green, but never purple."

"I don't know." Rainier answered. "But I was told that the purple hologram is very important."

"I guess I'll eventually find out." Comic Book Guy conceded. I need to see the Burns statue. Will you show me where it is?"

Rainier thought for a second. "I'll show you. Come with me if you want to live."

"Live?" He asked. "Is something wrong?"

"Not that I know. Just heard something about this space has two statues on it. This dock would be a great starting point if needed." Rainier explained.

"Starting point?" Comic Book Guy asked slowly. "I thought... I'm confused. I'm nine spaces from the starting point. Anyways, let's just go to the real statue."

"Follow me." He said and walked toward the Planet Hype.

They passed many people entering and leaving the Planet Hype, and two patrons held the double doors for the mayor and his guest. Inside was a huge restaurant with enough memorabilia to fill a movie themed restaurant.

"Welcome to my restaurant. I would like to invite you to lunch." Rainier offered.

"Gladly. Right after you invite me to the Burns statue." Comic Book Guy felt anxious as he was close to finishing his mission. "Where can I find it?"

"You already passed it. Turn around, and look beside the double doors." The mayor said as they both turned and saw the statue. "I put it next to mine, even though I am much taller than this Burns character."

"You are definitely taller." Comic Book Guy commented. "Shall we see if this statue works?" He approached it, and it looked like the one located in the movie store. He placed the MyPad into its hands and a green hologram appeared. "It works."

"I called to have the other one returned, but they said I couldn't." Rainier disappointedly said. "So I just moved it over there."

"Who did you call?" Comic Book Guy asked.

"The only person I could remember was..." Rainier started before being interrupted by the hologram.

"That statue isn't going anywhere." The green hologram said to both men. "Leave it alone."

"Well, it obviously doesn't work. I already tried." Comic Book Guy said.

The green hologram seemed to change his look to a meaner tone. "How do you know it doesn't work. You don't know what we are capable of anyways." It paused and the expression changed back to a blank look. "Greetings and welcome to Connecticut Avenue. This property is for sale, but be aware out of the three in this color group, one has already been purchased. The cost for this one is one hundred twenty dollars." Comic Book Guy frowned upon hearing this information. "The cost of a five-star meal inside the restaurant will be eight dollars. Do you wish to purchase this property?"

"Eight dollars?" Rainier said disappointedly. "No wonder my restaurant isn't making a profit."

"That's because we control the money." The hologram snidely said. "What is your decision?"

Comic Book Guy reached up and pressed the Buy icon. The hologram smiled then disappeared. Three pieces of paper printed out and Comic Book Guy grabbed them.

"Another title-deed." Comic Book Guy scoffed. "This was expected. It goes with my other one. A sales receipt. Also expected." It showed his fourteen hundred forty dollar starting amount minus one hundred twenty dollars for this property, leaving him with thirteen hundred twenty dollars. "At this rate, I can easily pay for one of your five-star meals Rainier."

"Don't remind me. With no profit, how is this restaurant still in business?" He asked rhetorically.

Comic Book Guy read the third piece of paper. 'Free meal for two to discuss the purple hologram'. "That's weird. It's like it was listening to us..." Comic Book Guy said cautiously.

"I guess this means we can go eat and discuss the purple hologram, and then my plans to become the governor of this city, and maybe the president." Rainier suggested.

"Yeah, that would be the day..." Comic Book Guy started but was silenced by several loud booms from outside.

"I didn't hear you, but it sounded like you don't think I could go from being an actor to a mayor and then a governor." Rainier questioned.

Comic Book Guy started walking toward the restaurant. "Look, a buffet. I think we can discuss it over some crab legs. Maybe you can be a governor."

"I will." Rainier proudly said.

"Let's discuss it. I have some free time between turns." Comic Book Guy said as he piled a plate full of crab legs. "Are these fresh from the river?"