Fitz and Liv arrive at Katz Deli. Liv wonders how he knows that is her favorite spot to get a pastrami sandwich. He's so nervous. He feels like this is their first date and he wonders if he suggested the right thing. Who would suggest Pastrami and Coffee? He thinks to himself. Liv is wondering who is this Fitzgerald Grant? He has a driver. A shiny black SUV with a driver. Who is this Fitz? What does he do? They take their seats at a table that is secluded that she didn't even know existed in this place. When Fitz walked in, the people scrambled like he was the President of The United States.
Fitz pulls out her chair and she sits down. She watches him intently as he takes his seat. He notices the stare, "I hope this is okay. This place can get a little noisy but.."
"It's the best pastrami in town," she finishes.
Fitz bites his lip, almost bashfully, with a laugh. "Exactly."
"Who are you?" Liv asks simply.
"What do you mean?" He boyishly smiles.
"I mean, you have a driver and a gorgeous Lincoln Aviator. You walk in this place and the greet you, Mr. Grant, as if you are royalty. What did I miss besides your mystery?"
He sits back in his chair, sexily, which she can't help but notice. He sits sideways, crossing his legs. "I am a mystery, Ms…..I am going to go out on a limb and say it's not Mrs."
"Pope, Olivia Pope," she answers. She becomes flushed and he can tell. What is it about this man that evokes so much inside of her?
"Olivia Pope. I like it," he smiles.
"You still haven't answered my question," she says, distracted by those perfect thin lips that he licks intermittently.
"I'm sorry. I was distracted by your beauty. It just seemed more important to take it all in."
Liv throws her head back, letting out a breath that comes from the pit of her stomach. "You are charming Mr. Grant." Now he is the one blushing.
"Well, I've only seen you in a jacket, gloves and hat. It's always hidden all the features I've always wondered about. Now you are disrobed, so to speak, and I can see more than those beautiful eyes and very kissable lips," he grins. He knows he has her squirming and she is. "Thank you by the way for that kiss. It was worth it," Fitz finishes.
"I've never done that before in my life," she laughs nervously.
"You've never been kissed," Fitz says surprisingly.
"No silly! I've never kissed a man I just formally met. I don't know what came over me,"
"I know what came over me," he says confidently.
The waiter comes over taking their drink order and food order. Fitz orders them a large pastrami with a half and half order of french fries and onion rings. Liv is surprised, she didn't know they had onion rings.
"I never knew they had onion rings," Liv says.
"They don't. They do it just for me," Fitz says. "So now whenever we come back, you know we can have it."
"The next time," Liv says tilting her head to the side.
"I am confident there will be a next time," Fitz says.
Liv clears her throat, "They make you whatever you want. So, who are you again?"
"I'm a lawyer. I own my own firm, which is in the family. We have a firm in Los Angeles and here. My father came from money and he made more money. He raised his boys that way. I've also invested in some businesses that have been very lucrative for me."
"What kind of law do you practice?" Liv asks.
"I am an Intellectual Property Law Lawyer," Fitz answers.
"What is that?" Liv asks.
"I handle legal matters for inventions, designs, artist work and trade secrets. I also handle some property aspects of the law."
"Very smart," Liv smiles.
"I'd like to think so but it's not lost on me that I had an advantage being born into this. I know I was handed a silver platter but I work my ass off to prove I'm just not here because I'm a Grant."
"You seem like the ambitious, determined, and focused type. I am sure you've earned your name."
"I am very determined to go after things that I think are worth the work," Fitz says as he sips his water. He then scrunches his nose. "I need liquid courage, the alcoholic type."
Liv laughs at him, "Why do you need courage?"
"You Ms. Pope. I am going to need all my wits about me to keep up with you," he smiles. She drops her head shyly.
The waiter comes back to the table with their food. He sits it on the table for them. They didn't know they were as hungry as they were until they started digging in. Fitz orders a Stella Artois and Liv decides she'll have one. She never drinks beer but tonight has proven to be a wild side for her. Why the hell not have a beer?
"What about you?" Fitz continues. "What do I need to know about the mysterious Olivia Pope?"
"Well….," Liv takes her time. She's so mesmerized by his eyes. She can't look away. "I shouldn't be eating this at all. The cholesterol and fat in this sandwich is off the charts but I love it. And then you added to my weakness by ordering these fries and onion rings. As a studying doctor I know I shouldn't eat this. It's definitely not good for the heart but it's delicious."
"The heart," Fitz says with a catch in his throat.
"I'm a 4th year resident, Cardiology. I want to be a Cardiologist and I want to be the best," Liv says.
"You will be the cutest," Fitz tries to recover his sadness.
"My mother died of cardiac arrest when I was 15 years old. It was a shock. I think my father's heart stopped beating that day when she died. Thank God for my Grandmother being there for me and not letting me hate life because of losing my mother. But I made up my mind, the day I watched them put my mother in the ground that I would study the heart and how it works. I knew I wanted to make hearts better. I couldn't save my mother but I could save others," Liv explains. She is then caught in her emotion. She's never done that before. She's never shared that with a stranger. There is a sadness now masking Fitz's face. Liv can see the pain in his eyes. "Did I say something wrong?"
"No you didn't. I'm just….my daughter was 5 when she died," Fitz says.
Instinctively, without thinking, Liv grabs Fitz's hand and holds it, "I'm so sorry."
"Turns out she was born with a heart defect. She had Congenital Mitral Valve Anomalies."
"And they couldn't do the surgeries. I mean that's one of the worst ones that would be with her forever but.." She stops herself. "I am sorry. I shouldn't ask so many questions."
"No, we did a few surgeries but her little heart. I think she fought as long as she could."
Liv hasn't let Fitz's hand go. She keeps rubbing it. "Fate is something."
"What do you mean?" Fitz says lifting his eyes to hers. He has been watching her caress his hand.
"We have so much in common," she says.
"Yes we do. Her death is what led me to New York. I just didn't want to be there after she died. My wife and I couldn't last. We couldn't look at each other without sadness, without her. So we got a divorce and she moved to Paris. She started over in her career. She loves it there. We speak from time to time but the death of someone you love can change your life."
"Yes it does. And no one can understand it unless they live through it. My father sent me to live with my Grandmother because he couldn't look at me. All he could see was mother and that was too much for him."
"I understand. I don't understand leaving your child but I understand wanting to leave the pain. You weren't in pain but you were.."
"I was a representation of what he lost."
"I suppose so. It hurt nonetheless and our relationship has never been the same," Liv says sadly.
"My marriage couldn't withstand what was lost and our relationship was never the 's why I came here to New York to start over."
They both let a silence fall over them. They spend the next couple of minutes eating, just not saying a word.
Liv decides to break the silence, "Why the skating rink? Why Rockefeller center?"
Fitz puts down his french fry that's he's dolliped in ketchup. "That was the last place we took her before she fell so ill. She couldn't skate because she was so tired all the time and shortness of breath. But she wanted to go and we wanted her to smile."
"That's beautiful Fitz," Liv says.
"She died on the 24th of January," Fitz explains.
"That's why you are there, in that spot on the 24th of every month."
"Yes, that's why." Fitz stops, looking at the sadness in her eyes. "Why did you choose medical school and not the Olympics?"
"I'm not that good," Liv smiles.
"You are that good. You have amazing form," he smiles back.
"Are we talking about skating?"
"On hand washes the other," FItz says.
This man strokes a heat in her that she can only describe as an inferno. "My mother and I always went skating. She said I was a natural at it. I went to lessons. I had a teacher. Then, I had a bad accident and the doctor said skating to my fullest potential would never happen again."
He instinctively reaches his hand over to her, grabbing it and rubbing circles around it, "I'm sorry."
"It's okay. It's not as much fun as it used to be for me with her not there. But when I'm feeling lost or I feel like I can't feel her, I skate."
"What are you feeling lost about?" Fitz asks. He truly wants to know what's going on in that beautiful head of hers. He wants to know what makes those eyes dance with happiness and what makes them cry with tears.
"Around the holidays I always feel lost without her. I couldn't make my engagement work, that always makes me feel lost. When I am at work at the hospital, I feel alive. I feel like I am found."
"I understand that feeling, believe me," Fitz says."And what do you think about love? How does it make you feel?"
Liv is silent. She doesn't know how to answer him. "I supposed all the warm things I should feel and the feeling of being overwhelmed will come to me whenI fall truly in love."
Ftiz sits back in his chair, crossing his leg again. "You've never been in true love."
Liv sits back in her chair, "I don't believe I have." She bats her eyes a few moments at him, studying his posture. "Your marriage, it's over. But was she your true love? Can you find true love again."
"I don't think we can," Fitz answers. "I supposed if we were in love, nothing could have torn us apart. I believe we could have found a way through because of love but…"
"Are you looking for love?" Liv asks.
"I think I'm looking for my heart," Fitz answers. "A piece of me died with my daughter. I won't deny that. But there's a part of my heart left to be filled."
"I suppose there's a part of mine that is empty, looking for the same thing," Liv admits.
The waiter comes by to take their empty plates as he cleans up around them.
"What's your favorite color?" Fitz asks out of the clear blue.
"That's an odd jump," Liv smiles.
"Don't ask me why I want to know. I need to know," Fitz says.
"Lilac," she answers.
"That's an odd color," Fitz laughs.
"But beautiful no doubt," Liv responds. "What's your favorite color?"
"Navy blue," he answers.
"That's strong. That's masculine. And most of all, it accentuates your eyes," Liv answers as Fitz has now turned a couple shades of red.
"I won't ask your favorite food, because it looks like we covered three tonight."
"Yes we did," she giggles.
"What kind of music do you like?" Fitz asks.
"Classic Soul," she answers surprisingly. " You?"
"Adult Contemporary."
"You are a romantic," Liv decides.
"Yes I am. Some might call me hopeless. I haven't properly tested that yet but hopefully soon," he says as he never breaks eye contact with him.
"I believe in romance. I just never found a man who knew how to do it and do it well," she flirts as she brings the beer glass up to her lips and drink.
"What's your favorite position?" He boldly asks.
Liv instantly chokes on her beer. She's coughing trying to find her words. He rushes to her side. "I'm fine. I'm fine," she says waving him away.
He sits down. He can't help but find a little laughter in the moment. Liv is patting her chest. She tries to regain her composure. "Was I too forward?"
"Forward but surprising," she says.
"I apologize. That was inappropriate," Fitz says feeling like a dick. "I have never asked a woman that. I don't know what came over me."
She can see the regret written all over his face. "My stomach," she answers. She wants him to know the answer and she feels embarrassed just knowing she's having these thoughts about a man she's just truly met.
His eyes widened and stretched. HIs dick is being unforgiven to him at the moment in excitement. He has no words except to take a sip of his beer. He thinks to himself, Noted.
"Did you not expect that answer?" Liv asks.
"No I didn't but your answer pleases me," Fitz replies.
"It does," she smiles.
"It does."
"What's yours?" She bites the bullet to ask.
"On my knees," he answers quickly.
She instantly feels a throb in core. She thinks to herself, I can only imagine what that tongue can do.
"Does that answer please you?" He asks.
"It does," she smiles. They both absorb each other's stares. Olivia feels a shiver in her body and shakes in her core just looking at him. Olivia looks at her watch. "I should probably get home. I have an early flight in the morning."
"A flight," Fitz says, almost a little disappointed.
"Yes. My grandmother lives in Rochester and I am going to spend Christmas with her. I'll fly back this weekend," she explains.
"I am sure she will love that," Fitz says.
"I have, as they say, a slew of cousins. It's always a wonderful time," she says. She looks at him. "What about you? What are your plans tomorrow? Well, I mean today."
"Well, I've already spent the start of Christmas with the most beautiful, most enchanting woman in New York City. Best present I could have received."
Olivia can't help but blush involuntarily. "Stop it."
"I tell the truth," Fitz says.
There is a silence again as they study each other. Then at the same time they both speak, "I would like to see you again." This brings out a laugh.
"I would really like to," Liv says.
"I would really like to as well," Fitz responds.
"So what do we do next?" Liv asks.
Fitz takes a deep breath, "I reluctantly bring you home. I go home and I call you and tell you goodnight. Then I hope that you dream about me."
"Are you going to dream about me?" Liv asks.
He looks her up and down, "Oh, I most definitely will."
Liv wants to jump in this man's arms and stay there. "We better go."
"Okay," he says as they get up from the table and leave and go to her home in Brooklyn. They sit in the car, both not wanting this to end. They've been holding hands the whole ride home.
"This is me," Liv says.
"You live alone," Fitz asks.
"I do," she smiles.
"Can I walk you to the door?" Fitz asks.
She is so lost in his eyes and the way he's tracing his fingertips on the top of her hand. She's lost in his touch. She finally comes to herself, 'No."
He's taken aback. He repeats, "No."
"No, because if I let you walk me to the door, you won't leave. I won't let you leave. And we can't do this tonight," Liv says.
"No we can't," he says unconvincingly. He decides there is one thing they can do. He grabs her face and kisses her hungrily. Their hands are everywhere over each other. They are getting familiar with each other's body as they grab at each other's clothes to get a feel of each other's skin. He's parted her lips with his tongue, sliding it into her mouth without fight from her. There is a moan when their tongues come in contact. His hands roam her body, latching her on to her breast as he massages her. Her hands travel under his sweater and shirt as she takes the chiseled features of his chest. It causes her to moan again in delight.
She pulls away, "Fitz…."
"I know," he says as he breathes life into her lips with his. "I need to see you again." She is out of breath.
"I need to see you too," she says breathless.
"Will you go out with me, New Year's Eve?" Fitz asks almost with desperation.
"Yes," she says without hesitation.
"Yes," he says happily.
"Yes."
"I wasn't going to take no for an answer," Fitz answers.
"I wasn't going to say no, believe me," she smiles.
He bites his bottom lip, staring at her. It's a nervous thing he does that he doesn't even realize. She notices it and she thinks it's adorable. "I should let you go," Fitz says sadly.
"I should go," Liv smiles.
Fitz gets out of the car. He holds out his hand for her. The chill of the night air doesn't seem to bother them. The heat from their bodies makes them warm. He pins her to the car. He kisses her neck and then slowly moves to her lips. "Goodnight."
She kisses him back, "Goodnight!"
They stand there in the same position, not wanting to let go. Their lips are grazing and foreheads pressed together. Fitz speaks, "Go inside!"
She doesn't answer. She breaks from his embrace and goes toward her stairs. She turns, "Thank you for tonight."
"How can I call you?" Fitz asks.
"Check your pocket," Liv smiles as she goes up her stairs. He fumbles in his coat to find her a piece of paper with a note and her number. The note reads, I'll wait up for you.
"When did you?.." He asks, shocked.
"You have to be fast to keep up with me," she giggles as she goes inside her secured building leaving her delight and mystery with him.
His driver, who never speaks much unless spoken to, says, "She's a lovely lady."
"Yes she is. Yes she is," Fitz says as he gets in the back of his Aviator and is driven home.
Liv gets inside of her building. She closes the door and rests her back on it, letting out a big breath. "What just happened?" she says.
She takes a shower and is lying in bed. She should be asleep. After all she has a flight at 8am and here she is at 3am waiting for him to call. She won't be able to sleep without speaking to him. She stares at her phone, willing it to ring and it does.
"Hi," she says.
"Hi!"
"You made it home," she says.
"I did. I'm alone unfortunately," he grins.
"You need a bed warmer," Liv teases.
"You mean a person to warm my bed," he says.
"Or an electrical blanket," Liv says coyly.
"Now that's just cruel," he laughs. She's thrown her head back on the pillow laughing. He stops to say something important and good. "I had a good time tonight."
"So did I."
"I don't know what the future holds. I don't know what tomorrow holds. I just know I am glad I didn't let another Christmas go by with nothing. I partly never said a word because I didn't want to feel like I wasn't focusing on my daughter. But then, I remembered the last thing she said to me," he says shakily.
Liv can hear the tremble in his voice, "What did she say?"
"I always called her my angel. The night we lost her she said, I'll always be your angel daddy. And there was a little voice that told me my angel will never leave me. I have to live my life and I had to know this earth angel who skated in and out of my thoughts."
"I was afraid to speak to you too. Many times I thought about it and then I talked myself out of it. The what ifs always won out. I want to get to know you. I want to…" She stops, she's overwhelmed by her own thoughts and feelings.
"I want to get to know you too," Fitz says. There's the pace, that silence. "I really should let you go. You don't want to miss your flight."
"No I don't. She may take a switch to me," Liv chuckles.
"A switch," Fitz says confusedly.
"Yes. To spank me for being bad," Liv explains.
"Spankings aren't all bad."
Liv clears her throat, "We should say goodnight before the rabbit hole becomes far too deep for us to dig out."
"Merry Christmas ," Fitz says.
"Merry Christmas Mr. Grant," Liv answers as they hang up the phone. The warmth of each other's lips and the lingering feel of each other's hands lull them into sleep and the thoughts of days to come.
Fitz is sitting alone in his brownstone. He's thinking about Olivia. He's wondering what she is doing now. He's wondering if she's with her family, laughing the way she does. He's wondering if she's thinking about him the way he's thinking about her. The last three Christmases he's spent it alone by his own choosing. It's hard for him. He's watching the Christmas basketball doubleheader while enjoying a perfectly prepared meal.
He's going to get up for seconds when the phone rings. He picks up, "Hello!"
"Fitz," The voice says.
"Mellie," he responds.
"Hello," she says.
"Hello…," he stops. Realizing he's already greeted her. "How are you?"
"I'm good. I'm good. I just wanted to call and you know.."
"I know," Fitz answers.
"How are you?" Mellie asks.
"I'm good too," Fitz answers.
"Merry Christmas Fitz. I know this is as hard for you as it is for me but I.."
"Thank you for thinking of me. Merry Christmas to you too."
"Has it gotten easier for you?" Mellie asks.
"Each day I breathe a little easier. A smile a little more and I feel a little better. She would want that for us you know," Fitz answers.
"Yes she would," Mellie answers. There is a silence, "I've met someone."
"That's wonderful. That's good. I'm happy for you," Fitz says genuinely.
"He's a good man. He's respectable and…."
Fitz stops her, "You don't owe me any explanations Mellie. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to live a good life."
"What about you?" Mellie asks.
"I am working on a new life for myself. I've met someone. I don't know where this is going but I like her. I like her a lot," Fitz says.
There is a bit of a silence. "You met someone."
"I did."
"You deserve it too Fitz," she says with a twinge of sadness.
"I better go. You take care," Fitz says.
"You take care too," Mellie answers as they hang up.
It felt good. It felt good to be able to say he felt good. It felt good to say there is hope out there. It felt even better to say there's someone who is making him smile and making him feel alive again. Today, he felt good.
Olivia made it safely to her grandmother's and she's found some alone time with her grandmother away from the chaos that is her family but it's good chaos. She knows her grandmother has noticed the plastered smile she sported since she arrived but she'll try her best to make her believe there is no such person. At least for now.
"You are working too hard baby. You need to put some meat on those bones."
"Grammy, I eat enough. Just last night we had a pastrami sandwich with french fries and onion rings…" she grins at the thought.
"That was last night. You are working these long hours. You work too much. You need to take better care of yourself."
"Grammy, I am trying to be a doctor. I have to work those long hours. It comes with the job. Imagine when I am saving lives. I'll lose sleep. I'll forget to eat sometimes. I'll forget to match my clothes. I'll fall asleep in a chair, barely able to make it to the bed but Mommy would be proud," Liv explains.
"She's looking down on you. She is proud. She doesn't want you to kill yourself in her name. Don't let your pain be the cat you are chasing. Chase your dreams. Chase your goals but don't chase the past Livvie."
Olivia takes in her words. There are so many questions in her head. "When did Pop Pop first kiss you?"
Her grandmother looks surprised by her question. "Kiss me."
"When did Pop Pop first kiss you?"
"The first night we met. He said he had to and since he was going to marry me we might as well do what people do," she answers much to Olivia's surprise.
"You and Pop Pop?"
"Yes and don't worry, I didn't wear white on our wedding day or a veil," Grandma Alice laughs.
"Grammy!"
"What is his name?" Her grandmother says.
"What do you mean?" Liv says feigning confusion.
"What is his name? And did you enjoy that pastrami with him last night. You said we. And most of all, that smile on your face has left since you got here. I know how much you love my pork roast but that's not why you are smiling," Alice asks.
"How do you do that?" Liv says.
"I'm 75 years old. Age before wisdom."
Liv lets out a breath she seems to hold when she thinks about him. "Fitz."
"Fitz. What kind of name?"
"Fitzgerald Grant," Liv clarifies.
"Fancy….He sounds like a President," Grandma Alice jokes. It makes Liv blush. "Was he a President?"
"No Grammy! He was not a President but he's very successful, a lawyer in fact. He's very nice and very charming and so good looking."
"And you are here with me and these knuckleheads when you could be celebrating Christmas with him?"
"Grammy it's Christmas. You would have gotten a switch and came to the city to hunt me down," Olivia explains.
"I am going to get a switch to you if you don't get your little chocolate buns back to the city and go get to know this man."
"We haven't even been on a date yet. I mean last night wasn't exactly a date. It was a first but not a date," Liv tries to reason.
"And he was hoping you'd be in town today didn't he?"
"Yes," Liv shakes her head.
"Get out of here and go find that man," Her grandmother says.
"What?"
"Get out of here. Get back to the city and find this President," Grammy continues.
"What about?"
"What about nothing? Family is family. We will always be here. Have you thought of anything but that kiss he gave you last night?" Liv starts to immediately blush. "That's what I thought. Go find him and spend what's left of this holiday with him."
"He could be with his family. I can't go and embarrass myself. We have a date on New Year's Eve."
"I bet you he's hoping you were there instead of here," Grammy continues.
"But…" Liv fights.
"But nothing. Trust your Grammy on this one." Her grandmother gets up from her chair, ushering Olivia to her bedroom to pack her bags.
"You are really making me leave," Liv says.
"Yes I am and someday you'll be glad I did," Alice says.
With that, Liv packs her bags and luckily gets a seat on the last flight leaving out of Rochester going back to the city. The problem is, how in the world does she find where this Fitzgerald Grant lives. Liv spends her time perusing the internet. She must find this address and save herself from a switch to her chocolate buns.
Liv arrives safely. She grabs the first cab she can get. Thank goodness she flew into LaGuardia. It makes it a little easier for her to get to the city quicker but she's nervous. She's sweating bullets and her hands are sweaty. She thinks she's found his address. Now her biggest worry is that he won't want to see her. Maybe he's not even home. She'll just look like a fool. She decides to try another approach. She will call him first and go from there.
She makes it to what she thinks is his humongous brownstone. She sees his Aviator parked outside. She knows she's in the right place. She pays the cab to just stay there in case she needs to just keep going after being rejected. She calls his cell phone. It rings a few times and she thinks he's asleep or just busy.
He knows it's her number. He answers accordingly. "Hi!"
"Hi," she answers.
"This is a pleasant surprise," Fitz answers.
"Is it?" Liv asks.
"It is. I started Christmas with you and I'll end it with you. Well, not physically but talking to you. That's close enough for me," Fitz explains.
"You don't mind me calling," Liv says.
"No I don't. I'd like it better if you were here, so we could continue last night but.."
"You have a beautiful home," she answers.
"Thank you," he responded quickly, not realizing what she was saying and he stops. "Where are you?"
"I am shamelessly embarrassed to be standing outside of your door," she says.
He doesn't answer, he begins to run to the door. He stops looking around the brownstone to see if everything is in order. He goes to the door, opening hurriedly. "Hi!"
"Hi," she says. "Merry Christmas again!"
"Merry Christmas," Fitz smiles. They both just stare. He comes to himself, realizing she's just standing there in the door, in the cold. "Please come in," he says letting her in. She walks in, taking in this grand structure before her. "I can't believe you are here," he says. "How did you find my address?" Liv opens her mouth to speak. He stops her, "I don't care. I am just glad you are here."
"Are you sure you don't mind?" She asks.
He answers her in a very different way, he reaches for her and envelopes her in a kiss. Before she knows it, she drops her bags and has her arms completely wrapped around him. He stops, not letting the chance go to trace her lips with his tongue. She moans with pleasure as the moisture builds between her legs, "I don't care what brought you here. I am just glad it did."
"I can't believe I'm doing this," Liv says as she kisses his lips slowly.
"Does this feel right to you?" Fitz asks.
"That doesn't matter," Liv says breathlessly.
"It feels right to me and that is what matters," Fitz says as he pulls her in closer to her, caressing her ass with one hand as he moves his other hand up her form grabbing her breasts and rubbing circles on her nipples through her clothes.
"What happens next?" Liv asks.
"Whatever we want to happen," Fitz says.
They begin to kiss for what seems like an eternity not wanting to feel that closeness. The question is, what do they do next?
