Chapter 17. Moving plans.
"It's the next day, why is it still saying relocating?" Jack asked, looking at the screen from the meeting room.
"It usually takes a while," Moxxie told him.
"Yeah, you should know that, since it always takes a while," Millie said.
"He's just impatient," Poch commented.
"Well before it shows up we gotta discuss how to start our mobile business," Blitzø commented.
"Mobile business?" Loona questioned.
"Well yeah, if this goes to another ring we're gonna have to move!"
"Why are we moving?" Moxxie asked.
"Oh! I know!" Millie cried out, "It's cause that's where the exterminators are going, mainly Poch and Jack!"
"Exactly!" Blitzø said, "where our angel slaying employees go, so do we!"
"So we're gonna start a traveling business?" Moxxie asked.
"No, just a moving business! Like pilgrims!"
"Pilgrims? Really?...were spreading the word of death for a price, would you please donate brother!" Poch said in mock religion, making Loona laugh.
"Very funny Poch, but I'm serious!"
"Sir, we don't have the money or resources to go to the ring every time the Cleansings gonna start , then come back," Moxxie explained.
"Uh, that's why we're gonna stay in that ring. What'd you think I meant by moving, ya smooth brain!"
"Were gonna stay there!?"
"Yes, for the entire time the cleansing will happen!"
"For the entire time!? Sir, we'd have to find a place to stay for who knows how long, while still being able to get clients!"
"Relax Mox," Jack spoke, "I'm sure the boss's Boyfriend will cover us."
"Huh...y'know that's actually a good idea! I'll just ask Stolas if he can use his connections to get a second base for both work and exterminations!" Blitzø realised.
"How's your Boyfriend gonna do that?"
"He's royalty! He knows a lot of demons in the other rings!"
"So your boyfriend can get us hooked up?"
"Yep! Just gotta call and ask once we find out where!" He noticed everyone smirking at him. "What?"
"You didn't deny Stolas was your boyfriend," Millie smirked.
Blitzø blushed. "I-I was too focused on figuring things out for us! We- Im not- w-were not like that!"
"Oh just admit you love him already," Loona rolled her eyes.
"Why don't you admit you're in love with Poch!"
Loona turned red. "We're just friends! I don't love him!" She barked.
"Oh yeah? Then how come you cuddle that plushy he got you so much?"
"Plushy?" Poch got curious.
"B-blitzø, shut up!" Loona blushed.
"Oh but it's cute how you growl when I try to take it in your sleep!" Blitzø gushed.
"Blitzø!"
"Hes...he's not talking about the plush I got you from Jack and Crack right?" Poch asked.
"...maybe." She answered avoiding eye contact.
"I thought you said you didn't like it?"
"Well...it felt like a memento...of when we first officially became friends...so I kept it."
Poch was surprised but smiled. "I'm touched, Loona...though I didn't take you for a plush cuddler."
"Oh shut up, you're the plush around here shorty," Loona smirked.
"Oh yeah? Wanna cuddle me then?"
"You wish."
"Maybe." Poch blushed as soon as he said that.
"Wait what?" Loona blushed.
"Uhhh."
"See what I mean! How can you not sense the chemistry!?" Blitzø shouted.
"Shut up!" Poch and Loona yelled.
A loud ringing came from outside.
"What is that?" Jack asked.
"Oh, they got a location!" Blitzø told him.
Everyone looked outside at the billboard while Poch just glanced at Loona's phone since she had an app to track the Cleansing. On the screen it said "Wrath ring." Beside it showed a map of the ring and it zoomed in on a specific location. Under it was the countdown.
"The Wrath ring, huh? And it's in like three weeks."
"Wait...I know that area," Millie said.
"Millie isn't that where your folks live?" Moxxie asked.
"It is!"
"Uh oh," Jack commented.
"Blitzø they're taking it to my folks place!" Millie said, full of worry.
"It's ok Mills, in fact this can help us!" Blitzø told her.
"Help us!?"
"Yeah, now we got a place to set up base! Just call your parents and we can offer them free protection!"
"Uh Blitzø, that's not gonna work."
"Why not?"
"We don't have a place to put you all, nor do we have room at our house for you all."
"We can just put Moxxie, Pochy, and Jack into the barn!"
"There's no room there either, plus it ain't proper."
"Proper?"
"You really want to be protected by groggy exterminators with midnight back pains?"
"I...good point."
"So you're gonna have to call your boyfriend."
"Fine I'll call- he's not my boyfriend!"
"Just call him!"
"Alright, al-!" Blitzø's phone rang. He picked it up. "Oh, speak of the owl." He hit answer and put it on speaker. "Hey stolas!"
"Hello my darling hunk!" Stolas said with a lusty tone. Blitzø groaned while the others snickered.
"Oh my fucking- you're on speaker!"
"Oh? Who's all there?"
"My employees and our exterminators."
"Oh, great! I wanted them here in the first place! You've seen where the next Cleansing will be, correct?"
"Yeah we saw."
"No doubt you and the exterminators will need a place to set up base if you're going to protect the demons there and I have no doubt you were already about to give me a call hout this, weren't you Blitzy."
"Maybe."
"Well, no worries! I got you all covered, and I don't mean how you cover me Blitzy!"
"Oh god…"
"I shall get something arranged for you all to be not only settled there but also be able to continue business while you stay there!"
"Really!?"
"Alright!" Millie and Jack cheered.
"You'll have to give me some time as I'm also setting up something for the exterminators," Stolas said.
"For us?" Jack and Poch said in unison.
"Yes, but I'm not going to spoil the surprise, but I will give a hint."
"What the hint?" Poch asked.
"Russian, Tommy gun."
"What?"
"I'm sure Dundy will get it."
Jack and Poch looked at each other and shrugged.
"Anyways, you'll have to give me about a week to get everything set up. I'll keep you updated. Until then I'd suggest getting you things in order and prepare for a move."
"Thanks Stolas!" Blitzø told him.
"You're always welcome, Blitzy! Love you!"
"Love you too!" Stolas hung up and Blitzø realised what he said, feeling his employees grinning at him. "I only said that cause I was happy ok!"
"Sure you were." Jack said smugly.
"Must've been really happy." Moxxie was equally as smug.
"A-anyways this is a good time for us to set up our site!" Blitzø announced.
"Our site?"
"I know Stolas said he'd help but this is a great way to get business from other rings! It just dawned on me that we can do that too!"
"The use of the internet just dawned on you?" Loona said in disbelief.
"He's a boomer," Poch said.
"Oh right."
"I'm not a boomer!" Blitzø defended.
"Sir, I feel like we should wait to expand before we move online," Moxxie suggested.
"Expand? Moxxie, does it look like I have the money to buy a bigger place?"
"Not like that sir, I mean hire new employees."
"We don't have the money for that! Y'know how expensive this place and our training grounds are?"
"It can't be...wait...training grounds?"
"Yeah, remember that place we took everyone to to train? Were Pochy sliced you and Millie up? Well I decided to turn it into a proper training grounds by hiring some imps to renovate it and some others to keep it cleaned and maintained."
"You did that for us, boss!? Thanks!" Jack thanked Blitzø.
"You're welcome! But they're expensive so I don't think we can hire any new people just yet!"
"How much do you have saved up?"
"Uhhh lemme just show ya," He tried to pull up his bank account, "hit this, hit this, aaand here." He showed Jack his screen.
"Oof. Yeah you can't hire yet."
Moxxie peaked his head between them. "Lemme see."
Blitzø swatted him away. "None of ya business Mox!"
"Well it's not like business is bad, just that you got expensive shit to pay off. Ya Know you'd think after that interview you did, explaining about us exterminators, you'd get an increase of clients." Jack analysed.
"Well you're still sort of an enigma to people plus we assassinate humans, regular humans, not high demons with powers like a monarch or an overseer, so what would having an exterminator here do that's already different especially if it's not angel related?" Moxxie explained.
"Huh...didn't think about that," Blitzø admitted.
"Yeah it's not like they get paid by the demons of hell for killing angels."
A light bulb went off in Blitzø's head. "Moxxie that's it!"
"What is?"
"We'll start a charity fund for the exterminators! Donate money to the poor demons that saved your sorry asses!"
"Smart but, might not wanna falsely advertise us as poor," Poch said.
"Why not? You look poor."
"What!?"
"Have you seen his place? He is not poor," Loona defended.
"Nor do I look it!"
"Well when you wear out of style clothes everyday it's hard not to think it," Blitzo said.
"This is my armor! I wear it every day for a reason! Plus you're one to talk!"
"Hey, this is my work clothes and I wanna look stylish as I work!"
"What do you mean by armor?" Millie asked.
"Oh, Gen's friend actually made those clothes to be resistant to damage from our angel invaders! I'm trying to convince Jack to get me one!"
"Why do you need one?" Moxxie asked.
"Protection, duh, we do help them out y'know. Anyways, back on topic, how should we start this charity?"
"I don't know. Online?"
"How would we share the link?"
"Make a sign and maybe add an address for the money?" Millie suggested.
"Don't have money for that, and I ain't risking my place getting ransacked and robbed by weirdos."
"Why don't you let me handle this? I know someone that can help," Jack offered.
"Oh yeah, who?"
"A good friend to say the least. I'm gonna need the book though."
Millie looked at him curiously. "What for?"
"Classified info. Just gotta trust me."
"Alright, I'll leave it up to you Jack!" Blitzø announced.
"Thanks boss! I'll leave right away!"
Jack knocked on the front door of Nala's house. The peephole opened and a periwinkle colored eye looked through. The peephole closed and the door opened.
"Thanks, Collin," Jack said, getting out of his human form as he walked in.
Collins Closed the door and smiled at Jack. "You're welcome." He was wearing a punk rock sleeveless shirt that had Doom guy on it and a black jeans. He had grown a foot and a half taller and gotten a bit lean.
"Like the look. You grow some?"
"Thanks! Nala got it for me after showing me the band! Who knew metal was actually good music! My growth, however, may be cause i've been working out, or the effects of staying on earth for a while."
Kenzie came by holding a box. She was wearing a red short sleeve shirt with a skull on it and short shorts. She grew too, gaining a foot and four inches in height, and gained a set of double D breasts. "Oh hey Jack!" She turned around to set the box down next to the night stand by the door to the living room, grabbing stuff out of it and setting it on the stand, showing that her butt also grew a noticeable amount. Each cheek was now the size of a regular balloon.
"Damn, she grew too!" Jack commented.
"And you won't hear me complaining and she knows that," Collin smirked.
"Sly sheep!"
As Kennie was setting things down she yelled out to Nala. "Hey slut! Your brothers here!"
"What'd she call my-!?" Jack was about to get his scythe.
"Tell him I'll meet him in the living room ya skank!" Nala yelled back.
"It's a game they're playing. Whoever snaps first has to do one thing the other says, no matter what," Collin explained.
"Ah ok."
"Jack, you heard Nala, go ahead and take a seat on the couch," Keenie told him.
"Sure thing, bubble butt," Jack said heading to the living room.
"Watch it."
"Can I?" Jack leaned back, almost getting swatted by Keenie. He sat himself on the couch, waiting on his sister while Collin and Keenie did whatever they were doing.
Nala walked in. "Hey bro! How's it going?"
"Hey Nals!" Jack got up and hugged her, "going good. I actually need your expertise but I also need some angelic questions asked."
"About Collin and Keenie?" She sat down with him.
"Yeah. Let's do those first. The hell happened to them?"
"Well I was just teaching them to Loosen up on things and then one night their bodies changed fully."
"Fully?"
"Yeah, it was slow at first especially for Keemie since Collin seemed to be more accepting of it. Honestly...I think this is the true them."
"Whatcha mean?"
"I learned a few things while staying with them. That bullshit purity thing runs deep. They were told and raised to suppress their impure and unholy thoughts, to reject them less they be corrupted and corrupt hell. Sounds like bullshit to me, cause if that was possible, then they would've already been corrupted. They agreed after the change, cause they realised something."
"What's that?"
"Purity is impossible for a person, and that's ok. Collin already liked rock music, and other "sinful evil" things but he was punished and forced to suppress that side of him, and if he persisted he was threatened with something called a holy cleaning, which they said it in a way to make it seem like some sort of aid. Really pissed me off hearing about it!"
"Wow...glad I chose hell."
"I mean, what's wrong with a little sin! I cuss and kick ass when someone messes with me, but I help those who I can and I'm not a bad person! You know what's proof that those running heaven are full of shit?"
"What?"
"They're still Angel's, not fallen Angels, regular Angel's! Heaven is an uptight hellhole who are a bunch of pansies to the smallest harmlessness of sin! If that's how they wanna be then take me to hell baby!"
"You tell them, girl!" Collin yelled out.
"Thanks Collin!" Nala leaned back. "As far as I'm concerned, Keenie and Collin are just free."
"Leaving them with you was a good idea, sis," Jack smiled.
"Damn straight! Now what's your other problem?"
"Well boss is trying to start a charity thing for us in hell to gain profits so we can then hire more demons to work I.M.P. among some other things, before we head to the wrath ring."
"What are you heading to the wrath ring for?"
"Oh, the next Cleansings gonna be there."
"Oh it moves?"
"Yeah apparently it's a periodic thing and sometimes it won't change rings, just regions, least that's what I heard."
"Huh. Has it ever been in the wrath ring?"
"Before I left Millie actually told me it's the second time it's been there."
"Too bad you can't just move to another ring."
"Oh definitely not, they tried region moving but that just made the Cleansing relocate so they think ring moving will do the same. Plus you gotta think about overpopulation and resources available."
"That's true. So what do you want me to do?"
"We were thinking about making it accessible to everyone as easily as possible while also spreading the word about it as cheaply as possible. Any ideas?"
"Well hell's internet is different from earth's but only by accessibility. Hell still has the same apps and online services but it's just a different version mainly due to it being in hell, meaning you can only see hell stuff in it. Like using a VPN but it's the...dimension version? I don't fucking know. With that said, since I'm the tech savvy between us,"
"The tech nerd." Nala punched him in the arm. "Ow!"
"Don't interrupt the nerd. Anyways, I can set up a program onto your phone that you can use with any charity app and once you find a good popular charity app, you can use the program with it to set up your charity page."-
"Sweet! What about publicising?"
"That's easy. You guys got an insta right?"
Jack facepalmed. "Duh."
"Dumbass," Nala chuckled, "I'll go set up that program, until then," she got up, "Collin, dick muncher, get down here!" She yelled.
Collin and Keenie flew down the stairs and came in. "We're here, pale ass," Keenie said.
"Hah, good one! I'm bout to work on something for Jack, so why not take this time to ask Jack about that problem."
"Oh um...we don't have to right now...besides it's not his problem."
"Keenie, if Jack's willing, why don't we ask? We don't know how bad things will get with him, especially with how we look, he could get hostile," Collin told Keenie.
"I know but,"
"Plus, Jack's an exterminator, he could protect us if he tries anything."
"Protect us? You act like he'll attack us! Don't you know him!?"
"That's exactly why I said what I said. I know how drastic he can be at times. So do you."
"...you're right," Keenie sighed.
"Uh, what's going on?" Jack asked.
Keenie and Collin approached Jack. "...we need a favor…" Keenie started.
"It's about Cletus," Collin finished.
Poch and Loona were at Stylish Occult in the accessory area.
"Your pride really that hurt over what Blitzø said?" Loona asked.
"No, I just want a nice necklace," Poch told her.
"Uh huh, so why didn't you get one last time we were here?"
"I...wasn't in a necklace mood."
"Sure you weren't." She was looking at the collars. She was gonna suggest it but remembered what she saw at the haunted house. She tread carefully. "So uh…what's your thoughts on collars?"
"Ehh...I'm not a big fan."
"Oh."
"...but if you find a good one I'd be willing to try it at least."
"You sure?"
"Yeah. You'd probably pick a good one like yours."
"I didn't pick this collar."
"Really?"
"Yeah Blitzø got it for me when he adopted me. Was an adoption present."
"He made a good pick."
"Yeah it goes with my clothes."
"And the color of your birthmark," Poch smirked.
Loona blushed. "Shut up."
"Kinda wanna see it again. Can i?"
"What?...um..we're gonna have to go to a changing room."
Pochs cheeks turned red. "W-wait really? I was joking."
"O-oh."
"Were you really ok with showing me it again?"
"I mean...it's not like I'm nude...it doesn't really bother me if it's you."
"I...ok...maybe I will ask to see it again...not right not though."
"Y-yeah obviously."
"...just to clarify, that just means we're really good friends."
"Oh right, right!"
They went through a few accessories, Loona checking collars while Poch checked necklaces, splitting up slightly.
"Hmm...oh hey!" She picked up a black collar with skulls on it. "Found a good o-" she bumped into a familiar large brown hellhound.
"Hm?" He turned around. "Loona?"
Loona looked up to him. "Vortex!?"
"Hey! How's it going? Haven't seen you in a while!" He smiled.
Loona nervously smiled and felt her legs get a little weak. "H-hey, long time no see. I've been...cool."
"That's great! Shopping for new collars?"
"Oh, no this is for-"
"Loona? You say something?" Poch came around the corner.
Loona turned to him and remembered the collar. "Oh hey Poch, yeah I found this!" She showed it to him.
"Oh nice!" He took a hold of it. "I think I can wear this."
"Hey, you don't have to force yourself if you don't want to."
"You picked it out for me, so that makes it easier."
"You sure?"
"I'm sure." He smiled.
"Um?" Vortex spoke.
"Oh sorry!" Loona just remembered him.
"It's cool. Who's this?"
"Oh! This is my friend Poch."
Poch extended his hand. "I'm Poch. Pleasure!"
Vortex shook his hand. "I'm Vortex." He smiled at Loona. "You made a friend girl? I'm so proud of you!"
"Ehehe." Loona blushed and twirled her hair.
"You two know each other?" Poch asked.
"Yeah, remember that time I told you about Verosika?"
"Oh yeah! That's when I asked how I was your first friend when you knew him."
"Well to be fair, we didn't know each other that well and I failed to get her contacts," Vortex chuckled.
"We...can exchange them now," Loona suggested.
"I'd better not, my girlfriends been real nosey lately and getting all up in my space."
"She having some insecurities?" Poch asked.
"Pft among other things." He rolled his eyes.
"Well how bout you get my number and I can communicate for the both of us?"
"Sounds good dude. But hey, I got a quick question."
"Yeah?"
"You wouldn't happen to be that exterminator Poch that I heard about, are you?"
"Yep, he's an exterminator! And a real good one at that!" Loona nudged Poch, "and I'm guessing a soon to be celebrity."
"Pfft, I hope not, I ain't got that celebrity lifestyle."
"Have you seen your place?"
"It's not that fancy!" Poch chuckled.
"Ahem," Vortex coughed, smirking.
"Oh sorry."
"It's fine. You guys seem real close."
"We're not that close," Loona and Poch said in unison.
Vortex laughed. "Well, still close enough. Anyways, yeah I'll take your number! We're actually gonna have a party next week, yall wanna come?"
"Really!? Yeah, we'll come!" Loona said excitedly.
"You guys can, I'll stay back," Poch said.
"Huh?" Loona looked at him confused. "Why not?"
"Eh, I don't think it'd be for me."
"Why not? You gotta at least try."
"Loona I dont think youd want me there."
"...vortex, can you excuse us real quick?" Loona pulled Poch to the side. "Whaddya mean I don't want you there?" She whispered.
"With some tension between Vortex and his girl, maybe you got a chance. I know you like him, so me being there will just make me s third wheel," Poch whispered back.
"If that's the case, you don't have to be around us, just mess around somewhere."
"Nah that's fine, I'll just chill at home."
"Poch, cmon, don't be like this."
"Loona I'm not going."
"...then I'm not going either." She crossed her arms.
"What!?"
"You heard me."
"Loona, why do you want me there?"
"Well...It wouldn't feel right going without you."
"Why?"
"Because...you're my first friend and this will be both our first party...I don't wanna experience it if you're not there with me."
"..." poch sighed. "Fine, I'll go...if you let me tap your birthmark." He smirked, expecting her to change her mind.
"Fine." She blushed.
"What?"
"Fine! You can tap it, once!"
"You want me going that bad!"
"Yes!"
"...ok...then I guess I'll be going with you."
"Great!" She smiled. They went back to Vortex. "We'll both be going."
"Sweet!" Vortex took out his phone to exchange numbers with Poch, "some of the guys are probably gonna be livid to have an exterminator coming."
"Oh yeah?" Poch gave his number to Vortex. "Alright. Just send me a text of when and where."
"You got it!" Vortex's phone rang. "Oh it's my girl. I gotta go, see ya!" He waved them off, leaving.
"Welp, guess I gotta find some party wear."
"I'll help you pick something out," Loona told him.
"You better." Poch grinned. "Guess I'll get this collar while we're here."
"Wear it at the party, it'll look cool." She and him went to the register.
"Think I'll do just th-" His exterminator symbol lit up on his hand and he felt a tingle, "the hell?"
"Whys your symbol glo-"
"Poch!?" A voice from behind spoke.
They looked back to see a female five foot two inch tall blue and white demon fox. She wore a white button top, had size c breasts, wore blue Jeans, a slender waist, and had a whip on her belt. Her eyes were red and her sclera was yellow. Poch froze seeing her. Her right hand had an exterminator symbol glowing on the back of it.
"It is you!" She angrily walked forward.
"Oh shit," Poch said.
"Who's that?" Loona asked.
"Loona, do me a huge favor and wait for me up front!"
"What, why?"
"Please!" He looked desperate.
"Ok ok!" Loona left for the front area.
Poch turned to the fox demon. "Hey Claire, what are you doing here in hell?" He smiled.
"I don't know, what are you doing alive!?" She shouted.
"Oh well...you see...we uh...we kinds faked our deaths."
"Faked it!? Wait, we!? Whaddya mean we!?"
"Uh...we as in...Dundy, Shelly, and...Jack."
She got madder. "You all faked your deaths! You pieces of shits!"
"Wait lemme explain!"
"Oh yes! Please explain why we wasted tears on you dying after having lost your brother! Tell us why we had to deal with the pain of losing someone we once called a friend!"
"The cleansing."
"What?"
"The Cleansing is why we faked our deaths."
"The fuck is the cleansing?"
"You really don't know? How often do you come here then?"
"Today's my first day here. What's the cleansing?"
"It's an event where Angel's invade and kill demons."
"That...sounds like the Purge." Her anger slowly died.
"Let me tell you what's been happening."
"So Jared knew!?" Claire yelled.
"Albest told him not to," Poch said.
"So he didn't trust me!?"
"It's not like that. Besides, why are you here?"
"Oh well, my master sent me here to pick up a few things. He was too drunk to do it himself so I volunteered."
"That's nice of you."
"Don't think I'm not still pissed at you." She glared.
"What was I supposed to do? I can't contact anyone on earth unless they got a mark."
"Then give me one!"
"You're gonna have to talk to Albest."
"Fine! But you still owe me for my tears!"
"Uh...well...Loona and I are going to a party...I can ask Vortex if a friend of mine can go?"
"Oh, I'm already going to that party."
"What!?"
"Yeah just talked to the dude, we got all friendly and he gave me an invite."
"Sunnuva, ok what can I do?"
"...you can wear a dress and send me a pic of said dress."
"...not pink."
"That's fine."
"Deal." They shook hands. "Well I'll get that mark and send you a text, and I better get a dress pic as my first message."
"Got it."
"Seeya." She left.
Poch exhaled heavily. "Well that was unexpected." He went to meet up with Loona.
"Who was that?" She asked when he came to her.
"Long story….know where I can get a good dress?"
End
Next chapter. Surprises.
