Suffice to say, I have had a very, very bad year
My brother died while I was writing this chapter. Editing and rewriting took an additional four months. It has become very difficult to focus on writing, so I don't want to make any promises about getting the next chapter out sooner than this one, but I do want to thank Kris, Orange, and especially Abby for beta reading and helping me revise this chapter.
This story has always been a source of emotional comfort for me, it just wasn't enough this time. Thank you so much for reading and for leaving reviews. Some of your comments have truly helped me during a very dark time. Never underestimate the power of a review given several months after the last update. It may help the author more than you will ever know
Chapter 25
Caged
"We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." -E.M. Forster
Fenton's shoes landed on the polished school floor. Another dull thump let him know Phantom had landed beside him. They waited, invisibly holding hands as they both searched the hallway for witnesses.
Phantom's grip tightened.
Okay, well, Fenton searched. Phantom could just be staring down at their clasped hands for all Fenton knew. He was probably reluctant to let Fenton go, but the end of lunch was only minutes away. They couldn't waste anymore time.
"I don't see anyone," Fenton whispered.
Phantom's fingers squeezed his again, holding on for a second longer…
Two seconds…
Three…
"Phantom," Fenton whispered urgently.
Phantom sighed. He released Fenton's hand, and their fingers slipped apart. Fenton popped into sight immediately, but he wasn't expecting Phantom to do the same. The flight had wreaked havoc on Phantom's hair, and it now lay in a disarrayed sprawl above those eyes. Every inch of Phantom glowed, but his white hair looked especially bright. The contrast between his pure white hair and glowing eyes against the backdrop of the school hallway made Fenton's heart pound.
The ghost's intense green eyes lifted to meet Fenton's. A small smile slowly spread upon his lips.
Fenton's next breath was a little harder to draw. He reflexively took a step back and glanced down the hallway behind Phantom.
"You're going to get us caught," he whispered.
"I have to give you back your hoodie," Phantom replied in a soft voice. His natural echo sounded even more pronounced within the empty halls of the school.
Fenton pinched his eyes shut and forced himself to breathe. "Fine, just hurry."
He sensed Phantom moving and opened his eyes to steal one last glimpse of Phantom in the hoodie. The odd warm rush in his chest that followed was awkward, but Fenton didn't fight it. It was his last chance to experience it.
Had Phantom known Fenton was watching him, Fenton was sure Phantom would have made a show of it, but Phantom simply grabbed the hood, ducked his head, and began sliding the hoodie off without any teasing.
Fenton bit his lip as he watched. His chest felt tight, the warm feeling in his chest twisting into something painful. He almost wished Phantom had winked at him. If Phantom had only teased him, Fenton could have buried the warmth and its pain beneath justified annoyance.
Phantom's head popped out from the bottom of the hoodie. He shook his head, futility trying to settle his disarrayed hair. He held the hoodie out to Fenton and offered him a small smile. "Here." He brushed the fingers of his free hand through his white hair, smoothing his fringe over his forehead again. "Thanks for letting me borrow it."
Fenton accepted his hoodie back and forced his shoulders to shrug, the movement jerky. "Not, uh, not a big deal. It's yours too, right?"
Phantom's fingers stilled in his hair. His eyes rose and stared into Fenton's. He didn't say anything. He didn't need to say what he was thinking; his eyes spoke the question loud enough to summon it to Fenton's mind.
Fenton caught his breath. He quickly began turning the hoodie around in his hands, searching for the bottom. His fingers moved clumsily, almost shaking as he bundled the hem up around the neckline. Phantom tilted his head as he watched. His attention made Fenton feel twice as clumsy.
"Do you remember when I said your clumsiness was cute?" Phantom asked.
"Vaguely…" Fenton mumbled evasively. Phantom had just been trying to make Fenton lower his guard—difficult to practice kissing on someone who kept flinching away from you—but Fenton's cheeks warmed anyway. "You were trying to make me relax."
Phantom snorted. "No, I really thought you were cute, but…"
Fenton slipped the neck hole over his head and began pulling the hoodie down, unraveling it until he found the sleeves.
Phantom continued watching him, a faint crease between his eyebrows. "Fenton…do you think you'll ever stop being so nervous around me?"
"Before Friday you mean?" Fenton slipped his arms through the sleeves, using it as an excuse to avoid Phantom's gaze. "No."
Phantom coughed as if he hadn't expected Fenton to answer so bluntly. "Why not?"
"You're—" Fenton pulled the hoodie down, "you're too—" he settled the hem around his hips, his fingers shaking slightly as they slid along the chilled fabric, "you're…too, uh…"
Phantom's ice core had saturated the fabric, embedding his chilly aura into every fiber. Fenton struggled to breathe. He took a step back, but it did no good. Phantom's unique presence surrounded him.
It was the hoodie. It was the damn hoodie. Fenton could run to the other end of the hallway and he would still feel Phantom's aura on his skin so long as he wore the hoodie.
Fuck.
"I'm too…what?" Phantom prompted.
Fenton glanced up. Phantom was still watching him—not really a surprise—but there was something soft and expectant in his eyes now. Fenton forced his lungs to draw in their next breath. His chest expanded within the chilled hoodie, amplifying the feeling that Phantom was hugging him. Fenton couldn't remember what he was saying, the point he had been trying to make. It didn't seem all that important anymore.
"Did you do something to my hoodie?" he demanded instead.
Phantom's lips curled slowly into a smile. "No. Why?"
Fenton's heart started to race. "Well, it's a little cold…"
"Were you expecting it to be warm?"
"No. No, I knew it would be cold, I just…uh…"
Phantom lifted his eyebrows expectantly.
Fenton cleared his throat and brushed his hand roughly through his hair. "It's. Cold. That's all."
"I was a bit overwhelmed by how warm the hoodie was when I first pulled it on," Phantom said softly. "It was as if I could feel you all around me. Is that what has you so flustered?"
Fenton felt his cheeks growing hotter. He quickly pulled the hood over his head and ducked his chin. "No."
"You liked seeing me in your clothes…is this more of the same? Now that it feels like you're wearing my clothes?"
Fenton groaned. Damn Nasty Burger employee… He lifted his head and peered at Phantom from beneath the shadow of his hood, his cheeks burning. "Shouldn't you get going?"
Phantom's lips parted and his mouth dropped open, but no words came. He just stared into Fenton's eyes, lost. Whatever was wrong was with him, he probably shouldn't be looking at Fenton like that. Fenton desperately bit his lip and shifted uncomfortably in place.
Phantom shook his head, and the expression cleared. He reached for Fenton and pinched the edge of Fenton's sleeve, giving Fenton's arm a slight tug. "Will you be okay? After everything we discussed, the pressure from our classmates might be worse."
Fenton twitched his lips. "A little late to ask, don't you think? Can't put it back in the box. But, um." Fenton slipped his other hand into his pouch and clutched Sam's phone. He looked down the hallway, but almost inevitably, his gaze wandered back to Phantom. "It will give me something else to think about when all the attention becomes too much. So. Uh. Thanks. Sort of."
Phantom smiled wryly. "Not the most comforting distraction, is it?"
"Nooo," Fenton drawled, "questioning your entire existence? Comforting? Pft. No. But it could have been worse."
Phantom raised an eyebrow. "Worse?"
"Yeah, you could have said our life is falling to pieces because you can't stop thinking about me."
"I did do that."
"Did you?" Fenton pulled his hand out of his pouch and snapped his fingers. "Oh, that's right! You did. Silly me. Love confessions are just so normal next to all the other, life-altering shit that came after. Must have just slipped my mind."
Phantom's smile spread, his lips parting to reveal canines slightly longer than Fenton's own. "I can confess my feelings again if you need a reminder."
Fenton hastily stepped back. He tripped over his heel and quickly threw his hand out behind him, catching himself against the lockers. "Uh, no! I'm good. Once was enough. Besides, we're, uh, running out of time. We don't want you to get caught talking to me, right? And we really, super, don't want you to get caught doing, um, that. What you did with the. The tree and the, um…closeness."
Phantom released Fenton's sleeve and glanced down the hallway, toward the cafeteria. "I suppose you're right." He returned his gaze to Fenton, his eyes soft but his expression unhappy. "Do I need to keep my distance from you again?"
Fenton shifted closer to the lockers. He tugged his hood as far as it would go over his head, desperate to hide any lingering traces of his blush. "Yes."
Phantom lowered his gaze, his shoulders sinking. "Ah yeah, I…should have expected that."
The kicked puppy look twisted Fenton's heart. Before he could stop himself, he blurted, "There's just too much gossip about…us. I don't want to get caught hanging out with you."
Phantom's eyes flicked up to him. "Would that be so bad?"
"We're merging into one person again on Friday, so, uh, yeah, it's bad. I'm already attracting too much attention. I don't need people watching me when I need to go ghost."
"Yes, but can you imagine a more effective way to protect our secret?" Phantom twisted his lips in another wry smile. "Can't fall in love with yourself, right?"
Fenton groaned. "Phantom…"
"Fenton," Phantom mocked. "Think about it. Please. I'm sick of hiding. It's like I'm in a cage, and the bars are the secrets we built around ourselves. There's no reason I can't openly hang out with you and our friends like this. If you and I can be seen as separate people, our secret identity would be even more protected, not less. And…there's no reason I can't let everyone see how I feel about you when no one knows who we are." He leaned closer to Fenton, their foreheads nearly touching. "Including us." His green eyes glowed brilliantly between them, brighter than usual. "Who are we, Fenton?"
"That's—we—" Fenton stopped. He forced himself to breathe in deeply. He let the breath out as a low, drawn out exhale. They didn't have time to argue. "What about Valerie?"
As Fenton had hoped, mentioning Valerie calmed the wild gleam in Phantom's eyes. His expression became more somber, and he stood back from Fenton. "Oh. Perhaps after you explain things to her?"
"So…what? She can see us as separate people after I've told her the truth? Do you even want her to believe me? What's the point of telling her anything if you're just going to disprove it by showing her how you've fallen in love with yourself anyway?"
Phantom flinched.
Fenton eyed the ghost uneasily. "You don't think things through, do you?"
"I guess not." Phantom sighed. "I just…"
Fenton chewed on his lip, waiting, but Phantom seemed unable to find the words he wanted. Fenton cleared his throat. "You need to get going."
Phantom closed his eyes, looking pained. He forced a smile onto his lips. "I suppose I should stop pushing my luck. You already…" He stopped and cleared his throat. "This lunch meant a lot to me, Fenton. I…" He hesitated, mouth open but voiceless. He ducked his head down and whispered, "I've missed you."
Fenton's face went hot. His head swam, vision blurring until all he could see was Phantom's white hair, bowed head, and sad expression. Fenton had only seen him like that once before, when Phantom had woken him that morning in search of comfort. Phantom wasn't watching Fenton's expression this time, he was just…waiting.
Waiting.
Fenton crashed his back against the lockers again. "Don't!"
Phantom looked up at him, sad eyes pleading. "Am I not allowed to miss you either?"
Fenton cringed, his heart twisting. "You're not allowed to just say it. Not like that."
"You will know how I feel about you one way or another on Friday."
"That's Friday." Fenton forced himself to swallow. "Hearing you say it is different."
One corner of Phantom's lips lifted. "Just like with the meteor shower… You felt that way on Sunday too, did you not? You said you needed to hear an explanation from me even though we were about to merge."
Fenton closed his eyes and groaned. "Damn it."
He had vague memories from their last merge in which Phantom marveled, not that there was a difference between experiencing a moment as one and experiencing it together, but that Fenton recognized it too. It meant something, Fenton knew it meant something, he just didn't have time to figure out whatever romantic faux paus he had just admitted to.
"Just go, okay? You need to get going before someone fucking sees you."
"Did you have a good time? With me? Hanging out with me?"
"Phantom…"
Phantom stepped forward again, his eyebrows pleadingly lifted. "Please, Fenton. It's important."
"Why?" Fenton demanded. "Why is it so important? Who even cares? It doesn't matter, we'll be gone after Friday anyway. If I liked hanging out with you, that's just—it's—fuck! It's not important. It's not! It's just—"
The bell rang.
Fenton swore.
Phantom held his gaze for several seconds, green eyes reaching into Fenton's heart where things were twisting, aching, painful—
Loud chatter from the direction of the cafeteria echoed down the hallway.
"You have to go," Fenton hissed.
"It hurts, doesn't it?" Phantom whispered gently. He stepped into Fenton's space, mere inches separating them. He touched his fingertips to Fenton's hand. Fenton's heart pounded in his chest and his vision narrowed, brightened. Each breath brought with it the lingering scent of the grass Phantom had laid on. "The more we get to know each other, the more we have to lose."
Fenton tore his eyes away from Phantom's and looked down the hallway. Any minute, someone would turn the corner and see them. Any minute…
"We have not truly spent time together since our practice," Phantom continued, recklessly dragging this out, "and we both know how much you hated that. I wanted a second chance. I wanted to do better this time. I wanted you to feel better and…not be so uncomfortable around me. That is why it's important. Are you…are you at least glad you said yes? Are you glad you spent your lunch…with me?"
Fenton pinched his eyes shut. His classmates were getting closer. Louder. Multiple conversations bounced off the walls, blending into noise. He needed to get moving. He needed to move, but he couldn't. Phantom wasn't restraining him; he was barely even touching him. He just couldn't move.
Fenton…didn't want to move away?
He opened his eyes and stared into the intense green of Phantom's irises. "Yes," he whispered. "I—I—if there wasn't—if I could just see you without—without everyone—everything—falling apart, maybe we could…" He drew in another breath. He forced the words out in a rush, "M-maybewecoulddothisagain?!" Shit. Too fast. Fenton cringed and repeated himself, slower, "Maybe we could…" his words faltered. "Um…"
Phantom's expression softened. His eyelids lowered over his eyes and his lips spread in a slow, gentle smile.
And then he vanished from sight, finally activating his invisibility. Fenton breathed a little easier as the pressure left his chest. He could still feel Phantom's light touch on his hand, his cold aura in the space before him, but no one would see Fenton talking to Phantom now. No one would see—
The contact was so light Fenton almost didn't notice the soft touch of cold lips on his cheek. He flinched, jerking away from Phantom in surprise. Phantom's cold aura and the touch of his fingers vanished. Fenton froze, holding perfectly still, his lungs drawing in one slow, final breath as his mind pieced together what had just happened.
Slowly, hesitantly, he touched his fingers to his cheek where the cold trace of Phantom's lips still lingered on his skin. His wide eyes searched the space in front of him for signs of Phantom, but he couldn't see or sense any hint of the invisible ghost.
The other students rounded the corner, entering his part of the hallway. Fenton turned and quickly began spinning the lock on his locker.
The locker popped open with a click. Fenton shoved his head inside to better hide his face because he had no idea what it was doing, what his expression might be saying. His heart pounded frantically against his ribs, trying to break free of its cage. His lungs struggled to keep up with its frantic pace, forcing Fenton to breathe faster.
Phantom had kissed him.
Despite the dozens of kisses he had shared with Phantom, despite this latest being nothing more than a chaste kiss on his cheek, Fenton had never felt like this before. It was like he was falling and flying at the same time, like the world was tumbling out from beneath his feet.
He had kissed him.
Fenton pressed a hand to his chest and curled his fingers around the hoodie in a desperate, clawing fist. The chill that had soaked into Fenton's hoodie remained, holding Fenton in a phantom embrace even though Phantom was—hopefully—gone. Fenton shivered and belatedly realized his face was burning.
What was happening to him?
Sometime after Danny's ice powers manifested in late spring, Sam had managed to convince him to sign up for 3D Sculpture as his elective in the following school year. It was supposed to be their chill class. She and Danny often spent the period teasing each other about their sculptures or talking about their problems. So long as they worked on their clay sculptures, the teacher didn't care if his students spoke amongst themselves. It was like having an extended lunch.
It was Sam's favorite class. It had been Danny's too.
Today was different. Today, their classmates were crowding around Danny like vultures when Sam arrived at the art studio.
Sam clenched her hands into fists and stormed over to their worktable. Danny looked up from the table at her approach. His blue eyes pleaded with her from beneath the shelter of his hood. It made her want to start shoving their classmates away from him. She wanted to shout and curse at them to. Back. Off.
Could they not see how stressed he was?
Sam grabbed Danny's arm and hauled him to his feet. "You wanted to try out the pottery wheel, right, Danny?" she asked as she forced her lips into a smile.
"Uh…yes?" was Danny's uncertain reply.
Good enough.
Sam dragged him away from the crowd and toward the pottery wheels at the back of the class. Danny's gathered 'fans' protested, but no one followed them. The glare Sam directed over her shoulder might have warned them off, but there were also only two wheels and therefore two seats, and once the wheels started spinning, questions and answers would need to be shouted in order to be heard. It was too much bother for people who were only casually interested in Danny Phantom's personal life.
Such tactics wouldn't work on fans like Paulina, but Paulina would never sign up for 3D Sculpture if it meant getting her hands dirty.
Danny sank onto his stool with a low groan. "Thanks, Sam."
"That's what friends are for," she replied lightly. Far more lightly than she felt. "Do you know how to work this thing?"
"No. Do you?"
"Just the basics." Sam studied the machine dubiously. "We can ask Mr. Coalson once he finishes rollcall."
She leaned her shoulder against the wall and slid her gaze back to Danny. His shoulders were still hunched and pulled inward. He was staring at the wheel, but his eyes looked unfocused, like the wheel was just somewhere for his eyes to rest while his mind wandered.
What had his ghost half said to him during lunch?
There was a little red blush dusted across Danny's cheeks, but that could have been from the vultures asking him personal questions. It didn't have to mean anything. Danny could just be feeling self-conscious over all the attention.
Sam wanted to believe that, she just…she couldn't banish the memory of Phantom staring at Danny from her mind.
The two of them had been alone together all lunch. What if Phantom had made a move? What if Danny now knew how his ghost half felt about him? What if Phantom had confused him? What if Danny was actually considering it, as crazy as that sounded?
Sam knew how charming Danny's ghost half could be, but if Phantom was the lover, Fenton was the fighter, and she didn't think he would give into that sort of pressure without a fight.
There just had to be a way for her to ask without stressing him out further.
"So," she drawled carefully, "where were you during lunch? Tuck and I missed you."
Danny started a little. Focus returned to his eyes, and he looked up at her as if suddenly remembering she was there. "Oh. Um. Phantom wanted to talk. We didn't want anyone eavesdropping on us, so we, uh. We left."
They left.
Phantom swooped in, saved him from a couple bullies, took Danny's hand, and flew him away from all his troubles. Nothing special. They just left.
"What did he want to talk about?" Sam asked.
Danny looked down. His head dipped down low enough for his hood to block his eyes. "Nothing important."
He plucked at the sleeves of his hoodie.
"Danny…" Sam stood up from the wall. She placed her hand on his shoulder and bent low so she could see his eyes. "We're friends. You can talk to me about anything."
He snorted without lifting his eyes. "Sure, Sam. Let me just spill my problems to you during a class where anyone can wander over here at any moment."
"So, you admit there is a problem?"
Danny's eyes finally rose, narrowed in a glare. "Duh. Do you want a list? Let's start with how no one will leave me alone."
Sam pulled her hand away. She felt her face trying to scowl and quickly smoothed it into a neutral expression. She slouched against the wall again, further illustrating her signature disaffected scowl. "Just trying to help, no need to bite my head off about it."
Danny groaned. He dropped his head into his hands with a quiet, frustrated hiss. "Fuck. You're right. I'm sorry. I just." One of his hands went to the top of his head and roughly brushed his hood down. "There's a lot going on right now, Sam."
"Let me help you with some of it."
Danny lowered his hand and stared, unfocused at the wheel. His black hair had become disheveled from the hood and his fingers, parts of it standing nearly upright. Sam longed to brush it back into place, but she didn't know if this half of Danny's personality would understand or appreciate that. Phantom seemed to think the human half held all their romantic feelings for Sam, but what if he was wrong?
This incarnation of Danny Fenton was supposed to be the fighter.
"Okay," Danny said, sighing out the word. "Maybe you can help with…something." He glanced up at her, and his expression looked pleading and…afraid? Lost? "Do you. Do you remember the portal accident?"
Sam frowned. She had been expecting something about Phantom. "What about it?"
Movement from the corner of her eyes drew her attention, and she hissed a quiet warning. Danny's mouth snapped shut, whatever he was about to say about the portal accident becoming locked behind pinched lips. Sam looked up from Danny and saw Kwan's beaming face. He was approaching them with his arms extended.
"Fenton!" he shouted. "Sam! I didn't know you two liked pottery too!"
He bent down and wrapped one arm around Danny. He reached the other out to Sam as if expecting her to willingly submit to his embrace. She stared back at him, blank-faced. Danny's own face went red. He tugged at Kwan's arm and tried to wiggle his way free, but the jock's arm had locked over Danny's shoulder and around a portion of his chest.
Sam had not forgotten Kwan was in their class, but she had hoped Danny's rescue at Phantom's hands would have dissuaded Kwan from being a nuisance.
Apparently not.
"What do you want, Kwan?" she demanded.
"To help you two spin pots, duh," he answered, laughing. He pulled back the arm reaching for Sam and slapped his hand to Danny's chest instead. "I've done, like, a hundred pots in this class. You've done none, right? I can totally show you how."
"Get," Danny growled through clenched teeth, "your hands off me."
Kwan laughed again. "Right, right! Of course. You're a one-man kind of guy. Don't want Phantom thinking I'm making a move or something."
He stood and released Danny's shoulder, but instead of removing his hand completely, he placed it on top of Danny's head and ruffled his hair. Danny's face darkened to a deeper red. If he had still been in possession of his ghost powers, Sam was sure his narrowed eyes would have flashed a bright, acidic green.
"You mean Valerie?" Sam said dryly. "Danny's not dating Phantom."
Kwan shrugged. "Yeah, but, like, who am I to argue with a ghost? They get possessive, don't they?"
He finally removed his hand, and Danny sulkily began trying to fix his hair.
"Have you ever known Danny Phantom to be possessive?" Sam countered.
"No, but I never knew him to be interested in boys either, and yet here we are!" Kwan flashed her another beaming smile.
"Could we not talk about this, please?" Danny demanded. He gave up on trying to resettle his hair and just gave his head a hard shake. "I'm not talking about Phantom, Kwan, so you can just do whatever. I don't want to talk about him."
"Yeah, no, that's cool!" Kwan clapped his hand onto Danny's shoulder. Danny went to brush it off, but Kwan lifted his hand away before Danny had the chance. "I came over to help you learn how to spin pots. It's really relaxing once you know how. And you look, like, really tense. You definitely need to just chill for a moment."
Sam rolled her eyes. "In other words, Kwan is convinced you're his ticket to Phantom, and he's trying to make friends with you now."
"Duh," Danny muttered.
"Wow, rude." Kwan's smile finally faltered, but not for long. He shrugged, and it came back. "I can keep people off your back. I'm not the only one who can benefit from this."
Danny crossed his arms. "Not interested."
"Really? I can be your bodyguard!"
"I don't think you're the kind of person he wants guarding his back," Sam said tersely. "As soon as Phantom loses interest, you'll be back to stuffing him into lockers, tripping him in the cafeteria, shoving him in the hallway, slamming him into lockers, insulting him—"
"Okay, okay, okay," Kwan interrupted, "but this is different. Now that I know Phantom's your friend, there's no way I'd mess with you. You really should have said something ages ago, you know. Like, man, come on. We never would have been so hard on you."
Danny snapped back, "You shouldn't bully people at all!"
Kwan shrugged. "It's high school! Besides, everyone else was doing it."
That was such an infuriating response, Sam actually felt her eye twitch.
"Anyway, that's not the point right now," Kwan continued.
"Isn't it?" Danny huffed.
"I can keep people off your back! You don't want to be mobbed. I want a chance to redeem myself in Phantom's eyes. We can help each other out. Win-win for everyone!" Kwan hesitated then added as an afterthought, "I can teach you how to spin pots too. But. Like. I don't really have a choice there. Actually, Mr. Coalson instructed me to make sure you two don't hurt yourselves."
"What does Dash say about all this?" Sam asked. "Aren't you worried about your A-list status if you start hanging out with us misfits?"
"Are you kidding?" Kwan laughed. "The three of you are friends with Phantom! You aren't losers anymore, duh. Popular by association."
Another Danny might have been pleased, but this one, Fenton, only grunted and curled his shoulders inward as if trying to protect himself. Sam scowled at Kwan, but he was either blind to their reaction or he simply ignored them.
"Dash will understand," he continued. "He's too proud to say he's sorry too, but he'll get over it."
"What do you mean 'too?'" Danny muttered. "You still haven't said you're sorry."
"I haven't?" Kwan actually looked a little surprised for a moment, but then his smile was back. "Oh! Okay, well, hey. Sorry about all that, man. No hard feelings?"
"Wow," Sam deadpanned, "I'm convinced."
The teacher began calling out rollcall. It wasn't the end of the conversation, far from it, but it paused as they waited for their names to be called out. Kwan smiled hopefully down at Danny. Sam watched from her place against the wall. If she had been more confident about how Danny felt, she would have moved between them and ranted at Kwan for being a grade A jerk, but this wasn't Danny, her Danny. This was Fenton.
He was like Danny but…different.
Danny would have been more outwardly derisive of Kwan's offer even as his smile betrayed his excitement. He had always wanted to be popular. He had finally stopped chasing after the A-lister's crumbs last semester, but his ego still would have appreciated the recognition. He never would have accepted.
Fenton hid his emotions behind a veneer of defiance and only allowed his true, almost shy self to be seen when he felt safe. He was constantly on edge because of all the attention. Sam didn't know if he would agree or not, just to have someone at his side who could shield him from the worst aspects of being in the public eye. Would having Kwan play 'bodyguard' make him feel safer?
Fenton kept his head down and didn't meet either of their eyes.
After roll, Sam managed to steer the conversation away from Danny and onto the art of pottery. Kwan lit up in his excitement, and Danny sent her a grateful glance midway through his excited explanation.
Sam held onto that tiny smile. She could help him. She would help him. She just needed to know what was going on between him and Phantom first.
How long had this been going on?
Was Fenton even aware of Phantom's feelings, or should they rename him Clueless One again?
What about Valerie?
What about Sam?
Tucker had warned they wouldn't be able to get down to the bottom of things until after Danny's detention, and Sam reluctantly admitted to herself he had been right. Danny was under too much scrutiny and too tense for them to draw answers out of him like this.
He was already stressed. She didn't want to make things worse.
But damn it, she wanted answers.
Lancer rubbed his aching eye, trying to alleviate the strain the computer had caused. He leaned back in his seat and looked past his monitor to the poor child caught in a maelstrom of hyped-up social scrutiny. For the moment, Danny had the peace of Lancer's detention. An algebra book was open on his desk, but Danny stared out the window instead of struggling with his homework. One hand idly tapped his pencil down on the book while the other propped up his cheek. His expression looked more thoughtful than distressed, but the tense set of his shoulders…
Lancer had feared Danny's parents had perhaps captured Phantom, and the student body was harassing Danny for it, but no, it was worse. Lancer had dealt with several difficult situations in his long years at Casper High, enough to know that the current situation was…delicate. It had all the ingredients necessary to cause an explosion if he didn't treat every element like a volatile catalyst. There was the potential for parental abuse, disownment, retaliation against a teenager…
A blunder now could cost Lancer more than just Danny's trust; it could endanger his life and Phantom's safety.
But Lancer had to do something.
Lancer glanced at the clock. Two minutes. Very well.
Now. How to begin…
Lancer turned back to his student and spoke for the first time since detention began, "Would you like to guess why you are here and Dash is not?"
Danny closed his eyes. When he opened them again, his eyes looked back at Lancer without Danny having to turn his head away from the window. "Favoritism?" Danny suggested dryly.
"Hardly. Dash's punishment will be carried out by his coach. I believe for starting a fight with another student, he will be forced to sit out for the game next Friday."
Danny's brows lowered and his lips pulled tight in a frown. "Seriously?"
"The consequences for Dash's actions are carried out in a less official manner." Lancer set his elbows on the desk and stapled his fingers together in front of his mouth. "I assure you, however, that he will and does face consequences for his actions."
Danny's frown deepened, but he didn't speak his thoughts aloud.
"This detention is meant to offer you a similar arrangement. Detentions are not usually carried out on the same day the infraction occurs as I'm sure you're aware. In an official capacity, I would have summoned your parents and Dash's to my office, and then I would have explained what happened on school grounds. Your parents and Dash's would have undoubtedly learned what started the fight between the two of you in the first place."
Danny's face paled.
"I assume," Lancer continued, lifting his mouth above his fingers as he raised an eyebrow, "you don't want your parents to know Danny Phantom kissed you?"
Danny dropped his hand to the desk, producing a dull thunk. His face growing paler still, Danny gave his head a tiny, robotic shake. Aside from the silent "no," he seemed frozen. Perhaps he hadn't considered the consequences of the fight. Normally, Lancer would have been required to inform Danny's parents about what was happening at school. Most professional teachers or vice principals would have.
Fortunately, Lancer had a unique perspective on parental problems of this nature.
"That's what I thought," Lancer said, "which is why your parents only know that you are staying behind after school to make up for an assignment you missed."
Danny blew out a relieved sigh, the tense set of his shoulders relaxing.
"Before I let you go, I must ask…are you in any danger from your parents?"
"No," Danny said, quickly.
A little too quickly?
Lancer frowned. "Your parents' anti-ghost feelings are well-known, Danny. You don't think they will take steps should they learn of this?"
"I'm kind of hoping it all blows over before it reaches them," Danny admitted.
"And if it doesn't?"
Danny didn't answer.
"Will you be in danger?" Lancer considered his own question for a moment and then clarified, "When parents disapprove of who their child dates—be it for homophobic or some other prejudiced reason—sometimes they threaten to kick their child out to force them back into line. Is that likely with your situation?"
"Phantom is just—I'm—it's not like that. We're not dating."
The way Danny broke eye-contact while stuttering through his denial…Lancer hummed and pressed his fingers against his mouth again.
Clearly there was something there Danny didn't want Lancer to know.
He at least cares about him, Lancer decided. It was the safest conclusion he could reach without outright guessing Danny's feelings on the matter.
"But if you were to defend him from your parents," Lancer suggested slowly, "would you be in danger? What would happen?"
Danny glanced at Lancer. "Nothing."
"Nothing? Are you sure?"
"I already stood my ground about the news report this morning. They promised to keep a more open mind."
"The news report? About the car accident this morning?"
"Yeah."
"Not anything to do with Phantom having romantic feelings for their son?"
Danny didn't answer.
"You don't think that will change things?" Lancer pressed. "A ghost kissing their son is certainly more personal than a car accident involving a stranger. If they find out, will they still be so open-minded?"
"That's—what's with the twenty questions anyway?" Danny shot back. "Why do you even care?"
"Believe it or not, Danny," Lancer sat back in his seat and placed his arms on the armrests instead of in front of him to convey through body language his willingness to listen, "I care about the safety of my students, in and out of the school. I need to know if you are in any danger, either from Phantom or your parents. Coming out of the closet in this way could result in…an unfortunate backlash, given your parents' feelings toward ghosts."
He had seen that too…albeit, not involving a ghost.
"I said Phantom kissed me," Danny said mulishly, "I never said I kissed him back."
"Are your parents likely to accept that distinction?"
Danny's jaw clenched. He narrowed his eyes and waited a few seconds, his gaze alert and focused on Lancer.
"That's between me and my parents," he finally said.
"I understand, but—"
"Can I go now?"
Lancer sighed. He didn't bother checking the clock. "You may. Detention is over."
Danny flipped his algebra book shut. He reached down for his backpack and pulled it onto the desk in front of him.
"Would you be willing to discuss these matters with a counselor?" Lancer asked.
Danny didn't even bother looking up from his backpack. He slipped his algebra book into his bag and zipped it shut. "Nope."
"Danny, there are resources available to you."
Danny snorted. "Last time I tried that, I nearly got my soul sucked out of me. No fucking thank you."
Lancer's eye twitched at the curse, but he decided to ignore it during such a stressful conversation. "Very well. I will at least block the website on the school's Wi-Fi tomorrow. That should help slow the spread of these rumors and remind the students to focus on their education."
Danny's eyes cut to Lancer and narrowed. "Website? What website?"
Lancer grabbed his flat screen monitor and spun it around to face Danny. On the screen was the website Kwan had (reluctantly) written down for Lancer, a social media site where fans of Danny Phantom had congregated to gossip about Phantom and the other ghosts.
And, as of last week, Danny Fenton as well.
Danny grimaced. "Figures. Do you even know how to navigate that site?"
"Of course." Lancer spun the monitor back around. Compared to the MMOs he played, the forum was child's play. The greatest challenge had been catching up with three days' worth of near constant teenage gossip and trying to interpret their slang. "Not that it was particularly hard to find the topic relevant to today's altercation. You have gained quite the following."
"They just want to use me to get at Phantom," Danny grumbled.
Lancer raised his eyebrow. Certain replies had suggested Danny was gaining a belated fanbase of his own, but perhaps Lancer's inability to understand online jargon had caused him to miss something.
"There will be an announcement to address the problem on Friday," Lancer said. Danny's eyes went wide. "Perhaps we should have held one sooner. Ghosts are a common element in our lives. It was only a matter of time before relationships between ghost teenagers and human teenagers became a concern."
"Whoa," Danny said, holding up a hand, "hold on. Back up. What is this announcement supposed to be about, exactly? Because if it's about me and Phantom—or what people think is going on between me and Phantom…"
"Not specifically about you, but related to these events, yes. I would rather focus on Phantom. His presence has long been a distraction, but if he is taking a romantic interest in our students—"
Danny groaned and leaned his head backward, straining his neck.
"—then we need to address ways for the students to keep themselves safe should his advances become unwanted. We will also need to address our protocols regarding guests on school grounds, on the presumption a relationship might someday spark between him and a student. He won't be allowed to simply come and go as he pleases."
"Everyone is going to know you're talking about me," Danny whined.
"Not necessarily. Until recently, I believe Ms. Sanchez and others believed herself to be Phantom's main interest among the students."
"That was then!" Danny objected. "Now I'm—he's—everyone is talking about me being his—his crush…thing!"
"And tomorrow," Lancer said implacably, "it may be one of the football players or one of your friends they think holds his attention. Gossip is a fickle beast, Danny. I realize the attention and good opinion of your peers seem particularly important at this stage in your life, but rumors like this are mere flashfires. It will burn itself out in due time."
"Ha," Danny muttered, "sure it will. And then your assembly will throw me right back into the fire."
"Perhaps. Which is why I would like your permission to address the assembly about the recent harassment you have faced."
Danny rolled his head to the side until his cheek rested on his shoulder. Lancer wished he wouldn't do that—it made his own neck twinge just watching. He held himself still as Danny's narrowed eyes studied him, as if searching for some sort of angle.
"Why do you care?" Danny demanded. "You've never done anything about the bullying before."
"I think both of us can agree this is a little more serious than the pranks you play on Dash."
"What—" Danny sat up. "I meant Dash's bullying! This isn't the only time he has tried to beat me up! It's just the first time I fought back."
Lancer grimaced. "Let us stay focused on recent developments for now," he suggested. "This fight between you and Dash was no accident. There are users on that website that are borderline hostile toward you. It has spilled over onto school grounds and caused any number of distractions among the students. What started as a fight can easily lead to much subtler attacks against you if we don't nip this in the bud."
"And calling attention to it during a school-wide assembly is supposed to stop that from happening?" Danny asked, incredulous. "No, fuck that. You don't have my permission to make things ten times worse."
"Danny—"
"Hell no. Keep me out of it."
Lancer sighed. "I understand our policy on bullying has failed you in the past—"
"It didn't fail. You and the other teachers just pretended not to see anything. You failed me, not some words scribbled down on paper."
Lancer's face went hot, but he continued his sentence, speaking a little louder, "—but I will inform the other teachers of what riled up our students and instruct them to interfere should they suspect another student is harassing, bullying, and/or otherwise distressing you over your connection with Phantom. There are systems in place that are meant to help keep you safe so that you may focus on your education. Counseling—"
"Soul-sucking, remember? No thank you."
"What about your sister?" Lancer pressed.
Danny hesitated. He opened his mouth, but something like indecision flickered across his face and no words followed. After a moment, he shut his mouth and looked down at his desk.
"Obviously, a fully trained adult would be preferable," Lancer added, "but your sister is a remarkable young woman. If you won't speak to a stranger about your mental health, at least speak to your sister. If she has any concerns or recommendations concerning your wellbeing, she still has my phone number. I won't ask for any details."
Danny furrowed his brow. "Jazz is…she's…" He ducked his head, hiding his eyes behind his black hair. "I don't want her to worry about me. She does that enough already."
"Can you think of anyone else you might speak to instead?"
Danny thought a moment and then wordlessly shook his head. "Not about this."
"Then perhaps it's time to let your sister help you."
Danny kept his head down, but Lancer thought he heard him mumble, "Yeah…"
"In the meantime," Lancer slid a manilla folder into the center of his desk, "I would like your opinion on how we at the school might handle a situation in which Phantom dates one of our students. Believe it or not, I have actually been anticipating something like this."
Danny lifted his head, but only to give Lancer an incredulous look. "You knew Phantom would want to date me?"
"Not you, personally," Lancer corrected, "just one of my students."
Lancer pulled a piece of paper from his folder and scanned over the notes he had begun writing a little over a year ago, ever since Paulina had begun hero-worshipping the elusive Ghost Boy. Lancer had known a day might come when he would need an established plan ready to present to Ishiyama concerning how they might handle the situation. His plans for how to handle the situation was neatly printed onto a single sheet of paper, now that they were likely to be implemented soon.
The only problem was that, like so many others, Lancer had assumed Phantom was straight. Lancer was slightly ashamed of himself, but he had never gotten close enough to Phantom to read any signs that hinted the infamous Ghost Boy was otherwise. No one had. How could Lancer have known? Phantom kept his distance from the human population he protected.
"I expected it to be Paulina," Lancer admitted. He was rewarded with Danny's ironic eyeroll. "My plan has changed over the years as Phantom proved himself more of a hero than a villain, but it seems it must change again. Your situation is…unique."
"Yeah," Danny muttered, "tell me about it."
"I want you to take this paper with you. Read over my notes and write down any concerns or suggestions you might have. You know your situation best, and you are old enough to start making your own choices. There are some things I will not budge on, but, obviously, alerting the student's parents could be disastrous in your case."
Danny's lips pulled tight, but he nodded.
"This may ultimately prove unnecessary in your case," Lancer continued. "These plans were written with the expectation Phantom had already started dating a student. There is always the possibility Phantom may lose interest in you, but as the two of you have been close in the past, I imagine you will have invaluable insight regardless on how to minimize Phantom's disruptive presence without banning him from school grounds. Such an act might prove disastrous given how many ghost attacks happen at or around the school."
Danny stared at Lancer a while longer as if not quite sure he believed him. But then he sighed and began stowing the rest of his school supplies in his bag. Lancer waited, thoughtfully tapping his finger on the desk. He hoped he was making the right choice by not involving the boy's parents. With queer children, there was never an easy answer, but Danny's situation was even more complicated. Phantom was an unknown factor. He could put Danny in danger, even accidentally, and so Lancer should alert his parents. But Jack and Maddie were hostile to ghosts, especially this one. Lancer's warning could cause the very danger he was trying to prevent.
Danny stood, pulling his backpack onto his shoulder. He approached Lancer's desk and reached out his hand for the paper Lancer held out to him. Even as Danny took it, however, he didn't meet Lancer's eyes.
"Um, thanks," he mumbled. "For not calling my parents about the fight."
"They will find out eventually," Lancer warned. "Too many people are aware of Phantom's feelings for word not to reach them. You may want to have an answer ready should they ask how you feel about him."
Danny frowned but didn't lift his eyes.
"And, Danny…" Lancer grabbed the pen off his desk and gripped it tight, needing something in his hand for this, "if your parents should act poorly…if you need a place to stay…"
Danny lifted his eyes, and Lancer thought he saw something shift in the boy's gaze, like a puzzle piece sliding into place. "Is that why you care this time?"
Lancer frowned. "I have always cared."
"Then fucking do something about Dash and the other A-listers," Danny snapped. "If I like guys now—and I'm not saying I do, but if I like guys now—I liked them back then too, and you should have done something a long time ago to stop the bullying. Maybe then Dash wouldn't have thought it was okay to fucking punch me on fucking school property, and I wouldn't have needed to fight back to protect myself. It shouldn't matter that this time was about whether or not I have feelings for another guy, okay? Dash was still shoving me against lockers, tripping me in the hallway, and making fun of me and my friends last week. And you didn't do anything about that."
"Dash's situation is complicated," Lancer said firmly.
"So, you'll just let him get away with it?" Danny demanded. "How is that fixing the problem? It's just letting it cause more harm to more people!"
Lancer sighed and rubbed his free hand over his face. "All right, I will consider changing my approach, but, Danny, your parents—"
"If they kick me out," Danny interrupted, "I'll stay with Tucker and Sam while Jazz files for my guardianship. We've had this planned out for years. Why do you think Jazz is sticking around instead of running off to college the moment she graduated?"
Lancer's mouth dropped open, but before he could ask why they already had a plan in place for Jack and Maddie refusing to accept their son, Danny sped out of his classroom.
Ghostlover83: So, it's pretty much confirmed Phantom is gay, right?
Phanatic53: Creep. You just want him to be into guys so you'll have a chance with him.
Ghostlover83: Oh, hun, you're adorable. I'm a fucking lesbian. Nice try, though.
Moon-ghost-goddess: Why are you guys so confident he even LIKES Danny? The only one who can say how he feels is Phantom, and he hasn't said anything about any of this. Just because *Danny* said Phantom kissed him doesn't mean anything. I could say the same thing. That doesn't make it true. It's just wishful thinking.
GhostRose8: Have you seen how nervous Danny is at school, though? I really don't think he likes all this attention. I don't think he'd lie about Phantom kissing him when he knew that would just make things worse. Like, what would he stand to gain?
Inviso-billy: I believe him. Phantom has a thing for Danny. I bet he's the one Danny's been texting all day. You should see the way he's been smiling at his phone.
DangerZone75: I would smile if I was texting Phantom too, that doesn't really prove Phantom has feelings for Danny. It just means that DANNY has feelings for Phantom, and, like, who doesn't?
Undeadfangirl: IF he was even texting Phantom. He might have been texting his girlfriend.
Hi-Casper: I think Phantom's bi at the very least. I wouldn't discount him liking girls just yet. Paulina isn't wrong about those smiles he gives her, I just think this Fenton guy has something deeper going on with Phantom, you know? Fenton said he and Phantom have been friends or at least working together for two years, so something must have changed, and now Phantom is looking at those two years a little differently. Maybe he's only just beginning to realize he's bi. Maybe something changed between him and Fenton, and that's what made him start questioning his sexuality.
Ghostlover83: So, Danny Fenton was Danny Phantom's bi awakening? That's hilarious. You would think it would be the other way around, what with Phantom being a hero and everything. Nope. An average, dorky high schooler was the one who swept the hero off his feet and made him think guys are hot.
Moon-ghost-goddess: Guys, seriously, I really don't think Phantom's sexuality is any of our business.
Ghost-ate-my-homework: In all fairness to Phantom, Danny Fenton is kind of pretty. For a boy, I mean. You saw his picture, right? Those blue eyes? That black hair? His face isn't half-bad either. If I liked guys, I would probably be into him too. Remind me again why he's considered a loser at your guys' school?
Phanatic53: Because he's a weird ass dork. If you had grown up with his parents busting into your school every week you would understand. Danny's just as freaky as his parents. Weird things are always happening around him like he's some sort of magnet for trouble.
Ghostlover83: Well apparently you need to be a little bit freaky to catch a ghost's eye. Kudos to Danny for scoring.
Phanatic53: HE HASN'T SCORED ANYTHING SHUT THE FUCK UP
Phantom's lips spread in a quick, fleeting smile that faded as quickly as it had appeared. As amusing as the speculations were, they were starting to make him feel somewhat powerless.
Why was he just watching people talk about Fenton when he could do something about it?
Phantom looked up from his phone to watch the Casper High football team perform suicide drills. Braced against the rail of the bleachers, he cupped his jaw in his hand and set his elbow on the rail. He let his unfocused eyes follow the football players from one side of the line to the other, safely invisible should they decide to look up at the stands.
What should he do about Dash?
Phantom's bored gaze landed on Dash, and his frown deepened. Fenton seemed to think Phantom had made things worse by confronting Dash, and, in all honesty, Phantom suspected Fenton was right. To some extent. Phantom had forced Dash into backing down, humiliated and probably hurt his feelings in doing so, and as per the usual routine, that meant Dash would lash out at someone else to make himself feel better.
He was a bully; hurting others to make himself feel better was what he did. Disappointing Phantom was just one more bad grade, one more lost game. Dash would just take his frustrations out on his next victim. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Dash's retaliation had yet to land on Fenton, however. There was probably another student with aching bruises somewhere, but Dash and Kwan had yet to tell anyone about what had happened in the locker room as Fenton had feared. It wasn't all over Paulina's website, at any rate. The users on that site were still bickering about Phantom's connection to Fenton. They weren't acting as if the rumors had been confirmed. Dash and Kwan were the only ones who knew Phantom had been texting Fenton, and for the moment, they were keeping it to themselves.
Why?
More importantly, why was Phantom disappointed?
He didn't really want anyone to know he had been texting Fenton, if for no other reason than that they would start trying to get Phantom's number, but…
But if Dash and Kwan had told the others, the rumors may have swung more favorably in Fenton's direction once others knew Phantom wanted Fenton safe. Better yet, Phantom could have openly acknowledged there was something between him and Fenton. If everyone already knew, what was the point in keeping it secret? If it were confirmed, Phantom could…
Phantom closed his eyes against the thought and bowed his head. He clenched his jaw as helpless frustration placed a bitter taste on his tongue.
He could…what? Openly visit Fenton? No longer hide how he felt?
What good would it do? The merge would still happen on Friday, Fenton would still refuse to acknowledge they could be true, separate people, and Phantom would still be pining for someone he was never meant to develop feelings for. Nothing would have changed except the pressure placed on Fenton.
Granted, Fenton had admitted outside pressure had played a part in convincing him their feelings for Sam were legitimate…
If people knew how Phantom felt, and they saw how Fenton blushed and stammered because of it, they might start to call the two of them lovebirds. Peer pressure might be able to do what Phantom could not.
Phantom hesitated a moment. He considered the pros and cons, considered whatever right vs wrong moral objections Fenton and Sam would guilt him over, and then decided to hell with it.
He navigated around Paulina's website until he found the option to make an account. It asked the standard information: email, age, username, password, ect.. Unfortunately, Phantom had to use his and Fenton's email address, but he didn't expect the account to survive long anyway. Once he and Fenton merged, it would be deleted.
He used a selfie he had taken while flying as his profile picture and navigated back to the thread, scrolling to the latest response.
Ghost-ate-my-homework: I just wish we knew what had changed. It must have been pretty big. I mean, girls (and guys!) have been trying to get Phantom's attention for years and no dice. What did Danny FENTON do that was so different?
Wind blew Phantom's hair back from his forehead, tousling it across his brow as he smiled.
He knew how to answer that. It was a moment burned into his memory. In some ways, it had come to define him. No one could ever understand how truly remarkable it had been when Fenton changed everything, but Phantom suddenly wanted to share it. He wanted the world to know about the moment he looked at Fenton and felt…amazed. He wanted to shout about it. He wanted everyone to know.
It wasn't the kissing—well, it wasn't only the kissing—or the hours they had spent together; it was just a single moment in time when Fenton had stood up and said enough.
If everyone could just see Fenton the way Phantom did…
Fenton's image flashed through his mind, blue eyes staring uneasily at him from beneath the shadow of Fenton's hood. "You don't think things through, do you?"
Phantom's stomach twisted. He quickly backed out of the reply he had been about to make, feeling a little ill. He lifted his chin from his hand and slid his fingers into his hair.
Phantom wanted Fenton to see him as his own separate individual just as Fenton's actions on Saturday had forced Phantom to see Fenton, but unleashing his fans on the problem wasn't the right way. It was just so easy and so tempting when the stakes were so high.
If Fenton would only give life as separate people a chance…
Phantom's phone vibrated in his hand. Phantom glanced down at the screen.
Fenton.
Phantom stood up from the rail and almost dropped the phone in his rush to open the message.
"Sam and Tucker are waiting for me at the picnic tables," Fenton had sent. "I have to give Sam her phone back. I don't know if she'll let me borrow it again tomorrow. So, I guess, this is goodbye for now?"
Phantom read the message twice before he let out a quiet sigh. He couldn't tell if Fenton was angry with him or not. Despite how often they had texted at the beginning of the day, this was the first time Fenton had texted Phantom since lunch ended.
It seemed Fenton had chosen to ignore the kiss.
Given Fenton's long silence, Phantom supposed that was the best he could hope for.
Phantom chewed on his lip as he thought. Finally, he texted back, "Will you ask? I enjoyed texting you."
That seemed like a safe reply. He wasn't begging, at least.
Phantom turned away from the football field and began to levitate. He floated to the topmost seat of the bleachers but didn't sit down. He fused his legs into a tail and allowed it to flick and ripple in response to his anxiety.
"I'll ask," Fenton replied a couple moments after Phantom sent his request, "but Sam let me borrow her phone because you were pretty depressed this morning. I don't think she'll let me borrow it again just so we can chat."
Phantom closed his eyes and inhaled slowly. He was no longer so depressed, that was true, but Fenton's silence these past few hours had been painful in its own way. If Fenton insisted on Phantom keeping his distance, then losing the ability to text him would take Fenton beyond his reach entirely.
Again.
Phantom had only just discovered how wonderful it was to talk to Fenton. He couldn't lose him now, not with Friday so close.
"If she won't," Phantom wrote, "Tucker might. And if not Tucker…" He stopped typing and stared blankly down at the screen. Was it worth taking a stance on? Phantom firmed his jaw and finished typing the sentence, "then I will just have to visit you. Invisibly."
Barely a second after he sent the text, Fenton replied, "You CAN'T visit me at school."
Phantom snorted. "Do you think you can stop me?"
"You SHOULDN'T visit me at school," Fenton's next text amended.
"I will be discreet."
"No, you won't, you're the biggest attention seeker I know."
"I managed well enough at the Nasty Burger."
Phantom paused after sending the text. He had managed well enough at the Nasty Burger…by wearing Fenton's hoodie to disguise himself. No one had recognized him, and…Fenton had stammered over his words, refusing to look directly at Phantom.
Phantom raised his eyebrows. A grin spread upon his lips as he reclined in midair. Now that was an idea.
"I will wear your clothes again and pretend I am another student," he sent.
"No!" Fenton's immediate response read, followed half a second later by, "Stay away from my closet!" and then, as if to emphasize Fenton's panic, "DON'T!"
Phantom laughed quietly to himself and drifted down to the bench. He smiled at his phone as he laid down on the cold metal, his tail draped lazily over the side. He could just imagine Fenton's face turning red, his blue eyes going wide, his mouth spluttering incoherently as he became more and more flustered. Phantom had seen it before, and he thought it was absolutely adorable.
Would it be Phantom wearing his clothes Fenton objected to the most, though? Or the possibility of someone catching Phantom with Danny Fenton? Neither outcome would appeal to Fenton, but would he object so much if Phantom, say, wore Tucker's clothes instead?
Or if I had clothes of my own to wear?
The thought crossed Phantom's mind like a whisper, and not for the first time. It had started to bother him ever since Fenton's reaction to Phantom wearing his hoodie. Phantom had nothing of his own. No clothes, certainly, but no bedroom either. No place to call his own. He had nothing he could share with someone he felt deeply for, nothing that was his. It was all either Fenton's or (technically) theirs. Even the phone was Fenton's.
It had come to reflect a deeper ache, an annoyance that chafed against the restrictions set on him, because Phantom was supposed to be nothing more than Danny Fenton's superhero alias. Alter egos weren't meant to exist on their own. They were meant to save the day and then be shut away until the next time their powers were needed.
Danny Phantom wasn't meant to exist as a person.
Unfortunately for the status quo, Phantom had gotten a taste of freedom. He no longer wanted to be Fenton's shadow, he wanted to be.
Phantom looked past his—Fenton's—phone and stared up at the sky. A white cloud drifted lazily overhead. The wind tousled his hair. He closed his eyes to further experience the sensation, to place himself in this moment so he would remember.
Danny—a fully united Danny—would do his best to return to normal. He would strive to forget Phantom and everything Phantom had felt because it challenged everything they had ever known. What use was it to begin living when the merge would just take it all away? Even the account Phantom had just opened on Paulina's website would be deleted after Friday.
Fenton had taken their picture in the park, but how long until a united Danny chose to delete the picture because it no longer meant anything to him?
How long until Phantom went back to being nothing more than an alter ego?
Phantom sighed and forced his eyes open again, his gaze locking onto the white cloud still drifting by overhead. He couldn't break his promise to Fenton. He could only hope Fenton might change his mind about merging.
Fenton had feelings for Phantom, Phantom knew Fenton must have feelings for him, but unless Phantom could get Fenton to accept those feelings and what it might mean for them as separate people, Fenton and Phantom would be lost to the merge. The only hope Phantom had of changing Fenton's mind was in keeping the lines of communication open.
Phantom tapped his finger thoughtfully against the phone. Finally, he texted, "If I can't visit you, I can leave notes in your locker." It wasn't the communication Phantom wanted, but he found the idea oddly appealing.
"Cliché much?" Fenton replied.
Oh. That was why he liked it. Phantom hummed ruefully to himself, feeling his cheeks cool as he blushed a little.
Fenton's second text, "Why not just leave flowers in there while you're at it?" dripped with sarcasm, but he really should know better than to challenge Phantom by now.
Smiling, Phantom sent back, "I will if you insist. How does a bouquet of ice flowers sound?"
"Like you're trying too hard. Besides, nice try, but we both know you don't have that kind of control yet."
Phantom frowned. He sat up and split his tail into legs again so he could cross them on the bench. He held out his left palm and willed his ice powers to concentrate there. A visible ice crystal appeared in Phantom's invisible palm readily enough, but when he tried to grow petals, the shape morphed into something more akin to a blossom with thorns as petals. He grimaced and held his hand out to the side, letting the warped crystal fall. It plinked against the concrete floor of the bleachers.
Phantom tried again, this time concentrating on rounding out the ice as it formed, but he couldn't seem to make it look like a rose. The petals were round-ish, but they weren't forming like a blossom. Phantom wasn't sure it even looked like a flower.
Recreating something more complex than an ice crystal was going to take some work…
Phantom grumbled his irritation and allowed the ice…thing to join his first attempt on the floor. They both began to melt in the August heat, but not quickly. Phantom was still chilling the air around himself. He had been directing his core to channel the icy energy into the air around him, continually dispersing cold energy so it wouldn't accumulate into "chill Fenton with an icy touch" levels ever since he had learned he could comfortably hold Fenton's too-warm body if he just got rid of enough ice from his core, but it seemed that didn't count as actual practice.
Phantom ruefully returned his attention to his cellphone. "WE didn't have that kind of control," he texted to his human partner. "I, on the other hand, have a lot of free time on my hands. I will start practicing."
He stared unhappily down at the slowly melting ice until his phone vibrated with a new message.
"Sure," Fenton's text replied. "Just don't forget to patrol the city while you're at it. I've almost reached Sam and Tucker. I need to delete these messages before I give the phone back to Sam. I think they want to talk to me about something."
Phantom sighed unhappily. That was the end of their communications then. "Alright. If I don't hear from you tomorrow, I'll leave notes in your locker."
"Yay, love notes."
Phantom raised an eyebrow.
Sure enough, a second message from Fenton appeared almost immediately after. "Shit, wait. I meant that in a sarcastic, 'Haha, you're so hopeless' sort of way, not in a flirty way. Or anything. I wasn't teasing."
"I liked my idea of visiting you better too," Phantom texted with a grin.
"Ha, no. I'll take a love note and some melting flowers instead, thanks. Look, I'll ask Tucker, and if he won't let me borrow his phone, maybe Jazz will. It's not the end of the world if we can't talk tomorrow."
"Isn't it?" Phantom whispered to the empty space around him.
He closed his eyes for a moment and forced himself to breathe slowly. Their phone call that morning and the texting throughout the day had made a difference in Fenton's behavior toward Phantom. Fenton had been stiff and uneasy when Phantom healed him in the classroom yesterday, and yet today during lunch he had allowed Phantom to carry him away from the school and had followed Phantom into the park without any fear of them being alone together.
They had talked. For the first time since this all began, they had been able to sit down and discuss who they were and how they felt. Not about each other, unfortunately, but how they felt about Valerie, Sam, and Phantom's fears.
There was finally a chance, a real chance Fenton might change his mind. Phantom finally had hope, and it was all because they had opened the lines of communication.
He didn't know how to explain that without scaring Fenton off, however, so he simply texted, "We shall see."
He waited for Fenton to text him back, but after a couple minutes had passed without any sort of response, he sighed. He laid down again and set one foot on the bench. He lowered his phone onto his chest and turned his head toward the football field.
The jocks were still only performing exercises to the beat of the coach's harsh whistle. Neither Dash nor Kwan would be alone any time soon. Phantom wasn't sure he wanted to follow them around until then. He would rather see if Sam or Tucker wanted to hang out before he began his evening patrol, but he would have to wait in that case too. Wait until they finished speaking to Fenton.
Or… he thought to himself, I could join them? Whatever concerns Fenton in their eyes likely concerns me as well. It shouldn't be a problem. And I would get to spend a few minutes in Fenton's company.
It was tempting. It was very tempting.
Phantom lifted his phone off his chest and texted Fenton one last time. "What do Sam and Tucker want to talk about?"
He stared at the screen a moment, and then he lowered the phone onto his chest again, sighing. Fenton had likely handed the phone back to Sam already.
So, it was a surprise to feel his phone buzz from another incoming message. Phantom lifted it quickly.
"I don't know. Something's not right. Tucker looks nervous and Sam's biting her nails. Have they said anything to you about it?"
Phantom frowned. Sam and Tucker weren't easily rattled. "I haven't spoken to them since last night," he texted Fenton. "I told them about my memories feeling off, and a little about my lack of feelings for Sam, but I doubt it was enough to make them worried."
Phantom had come out to them as bi, however.
He chewed thoughtfully on his lip. It was possible they were planning to ease Fenton into a confession, but it seemed strange for them to be nervous if that were the case.
Phantom's phone vibrated again, and he refocused his attention on the screen.
"I'm probably just letting all the drama at school get to me," Fenton's text read, "but what if they're starting to buy into it? What if they really think you're crushing on me?"
"You mean, what if they know the truth?"
Phantom meant for his message to be teasing, but Fenton's reply was a one-word answer, "Yes."
Phantom hummed. He had actually wished he could tell Sam and Tucker the truth last night; he didn't see how them discovering the truth would be a bad thing on its own. If they knew, they could help Fenton and Phantom navigate their feelings and maybe even offer support. Unlike the people on Paulina's website, Sam and Tucker actually knew the full story.
Well. Most of the full story.
Them learning about the most recent chapter was something Fenton had been dreading. Sam and Tucker knew the truth about their past, they knew Fenton and Phantom were supposed to be one person, and that was where Fenton's shame lay. If they confronted Fenton on the possibility his "ghost half" was in love with him…
Phantom sent another text to Fenton, offering, "Do you want me there with you?"
"I don't know, maybe? Can you?"
Phantom sat up quickly. "I'm nearby. I can be there soon."
"Can you stay invisible and just, like, offer support? Like you did with the date? This may not be anything serious, but if it is, maybe I can downplay it."
Phantom smiled, both at the memory and in Fenton's willingness to try playing a deception when he had been so doubtful that morning. "Sit close enough for our shoulders to touch? Whisper suggestions into your ear? Sign me up."
"Don't make this weird."
Phantom's smile gained a devious edge as he floated into the air, his legs blurring into a spectral tail. "Me? The 'lover half?' Make things weird? Would I do that?"
He tucked his phone into the utility belt and flew above the football field. The picnic tables were just outside the fence of the field, and once Phantom was high enough, he could spot three people sitting at those tables. Sam and Tucker looked like every other teenager from this distance, but Fenton's red hoodie was easily identifiable. Excitement stirred in Phantom's chest.
It was a full hour after school had ended, but Phantom searched the area for any lingering students before he sped toward his friends.
Whatever Sam and Tucker wanted to talk about, Phantom assumed they wouldn't want an audience.
Not a visible one, anyway.
Should I feel bad for eavesdropping? he wondered. He shrugged a moment later.
He would find out what they were saying when he and Fenton merged on Friday, anyway. Two days early wouldn't make much difference.
My initial plan for this last scene was for Fenton to meet with Sam and Tucker on his own (and in fact, I have over 2k of that scene written lol) but I want all four friends to finally be on the same page with each other (for reasons) and I wanted Fenton to request Phantom's support. It shows him reaching out to Phantom in the same way Phantom has been reaching out to him.
And if it feels like Fenton is softening toward Phantom...yes. Reluctantly. Phantom's theory could change things between them, and it's affecting how Fenton sees him.
I like to headcanon Lancer as a closeted gay man, and in this story he has been hiding his sexuality ever since a romance during his cheerleading days in high school led to him and the boy he was interested in facing backlash in much the same way Fenton and Phantom are except...worse. Much worse. Because same-sex couples have only recently (like, a decade recently) been openly accepted. This caused Lancer to turn away from the boy, bury his identity, and ultimately end up alone. I tried to drop hints because I'm afraid I won't be able to address it in-story. I will try, though. I want to tie it into how he treats the A-list crowd vs the bullied.
If you liked Lancer's scene, you can thank Orange and Abby for that especially. My original scene involved Lancer trying to convince Fenton to open up about his feelings toward Phantom/talk about his problems. Unfortunately, this is not a conversation Lancer could or should have with Fenton. I wanted to draw attention to Lancer being somewhat unethical (particularly in his bias toward athletes and cheerleaders) but questioning his student about his sexuality was a step too far when they were alone and Fenton couldn't leave. I don't mind writing a character making a bad decision (particularly since his backstory made it possible for Lancer to feel personally invested and therefore willing to overlook his better judgement to keep Fenton from making the same mistakes he had), but it was out of character for Fenton to let him get away with it. I could either rewrite it with Fenton and Lancer arguing, or I could rewrite Lancer as being more aware of his position and Fenton's need for privacy. I decided on the second.
It was a painful revision, but necessary. The original had a rant by Fenton I was really sad to lose, but I'm hoping to bring it back when Fenton opens up to Jazz. Or perhaps Sam/Tucker.
Speaking of, Sam and Tucker get some answers next chapter. I know a lot of you were/are looking forward to that, so I'll try my best! I have a plan for how it all unfolds. I just need to implement it, and so far it's giving me trouble (the focus thing, ugh)
If you have any concerns or thoughts about Sam and Tucker speaking to Fenton (and Phantom) about what's going on, feel free to share them! I have plans, but I'm not perfect. I want to try to cover as many angles as I can. What I can promise is Sam won't be bashed. Tucker won't be either, but I know Sam is the one who usually gets the worst of it. This is a trio (quad) of friends, and I want their friendship to be the thing you feel the most, even when there is tension amid the group.
Thank you so much for reading and for sticking with me for so long
