15 - Vignette- Post- Reaper's Game - Shiki's Perspective

xxxxx


All to Myself

"So, when am I going to meet Eri?"

It sounded like a simple question enough, but by now it was one that had been asked over and over again, with varied wordings and different tones. The one Neku used today was casual.

"You'll see her soon," I told him, though I purposefully didn't specify exactly when 'soon' was.

He sighed, holding his hands behind his head and leaning on the wall we were standing by. Neku and I were 'people watching' again. After the game, for one reason or another, we met up outside ten-four every now and when we had nothing else to do, we resorted to watching the people of Shibuya walk by, going on with their daily lives.

"You don't want me to meet her." It was a statement, not a question.

And it wasn't totally untrue. I gave him a look that said "guilty as charged" before turning my eyes back to the passer-bys.

I tried to ignore the feeling of him staring at me, but it wasn't working very well, even though I knew he was just trying to get me to talk.

Finally he spoke again, "Well, what's the reason?"

Yes, that was the question. There were too many – too many reasons floating around in my head. There have been countless situations I've imagined up where Eri met Neku, and the majority aren't…preferable.

But this was Neku and I couldn't just not tell him. "You know how every time you said Eri should join us at Hachiko I've said she was busy? I kind of lied sometimes." The feeling of his gaze intensified. "Okay, I lied most of the time." I could see him nod slightly out of the corner of my eye. Of course he knew I was lying all those times; he just wanted me to admit it. He's frustrating like that, but I feel better when I'm talking to (or at) him.

"The truth is, I've been a bit selfish. Eri's my best friend, but she has a lot of other friends too. She used to invite me along with them but I just couldn't quite fit in with them. And I didn't mind – having Eri for a friend was enough for me. That's what I told myself, although it did get lonely sometimes. But after I met you and the others, I just felt like I really belonged," I said quietly, still watching the crowd, though I let the corner of my lips tug upwards in a small rueful smile. "I'm afraid that you guys will like Eri more than me. And that I'll be left behind again…"

My voice trailed off as I waited for Neku's response.

"Idiot."

"What?" My eyes found their way to Neku's, which looked pretty bored. I felt offended. I clenched my fist and held it against my chest. "I just poured my heart to you and all you can say is 'idiot'?!"

"There's no other way to describe those 'troubles' but idiotic." Damn the way he can pull of insults in a monotone voice.

"I'm so sorry that my problems-"

Neku cut me off. "It's idiotic because I've already told you. You'll never be Eri, you're you. You're Shiki. And we all like you for being Shiki. Even if we all end up liking Eri too, you're still going to be our friend." Somehow the lack of expression on his face assured me. As if what he said was just common sense and that us being friends was a hard-ground fact.

Suddenly it felt like a huge weight had been lifted off me. A smile found its way onto my face. "Thanks Neku."

And just like that, we continued watching the people of Shibuya, in a comfortable silence. It was almost like this conversation didn't even happen.

Only, after a while, I heard Neku's voice again.

"Even when I do meet Eri, I'm positive that I'll like you better."

Neku had said this with so much confidence that it surprised me. "How can you be so sure?"

"No matter who I meet, I think you would always be my entry fee."

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A/N: Oh my feels. I think I just gave myself feels with that last line because I just cannot get over how Shiki was Neku's entry fee. I think there should be a song dedicated to that one fact. Someone go make a song about her being his entry fee. Anyway, since I couldn't help myself:

Extra:

"Eri, I've got to introduce you to my new friends."

"Ah, the ones from your, erm, death game, right? You mean I can finally meet them?"

"Yes, they're ready to meet you now. You will not believe what one of them said today…"

"Ohmegosh no way!"

"Yes, I can't believe it, he was just so sweet."

"He likes you. He so totally likes you."

"No way. It was just a sweet platonic thing that he said-"

"I've got to text Ai and Mina about this. Let's see, 'Shiki's got herself a boyfriend' -"

"W-what? No!"

"Too late. It's done."

End.